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1
00:00:01,936 --> 00:00:03,702
ng Theory...
2
00:00:03,771 --> 00:00:04,970
We just published
a few months ago.
3
00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:06,305
How did you have time
to design an experiment?
4
00:00:06,374 --> 00:00:09,441
This whole thing is
actually a gigantic accident.
5
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,144
You weren't even thinking
about super-asymmetry?
6
00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:13,479
Thinking about it?
(chuckles)
7
00:00:13,547 --> 00:00:16,682
We don't even understand it.
(both laugh)
8
00:00:16,751 --> 00:00:18,283
Uh, can you believe this?
9
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:19,685
Doctors Pemberton and
Campbell have been doing
10
00:00:19,754 --> 00:00:22,821
a press tour trying to take
credit for super-asymmetry.
11
00:00:22,890 --> 00:00:24,923
So what? I mean, no one's
gonna give them credit
12
00:00:24,992 --> 00:00:26,992
for accidentally
discovering something.
13
00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:27,993
WOLOWITZ:
Yeah, who remembers the guy
14
00:00:28,062 --> 00:00:29,128
who was trying to find India
15
00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:30,696
and discovered America instead?
16
00:00:30,765 --> 00:00:32,598
What was his name again?
(chuckles)
17
00:00:32,666 --> 00:00:34,600
Now stop trying to steal
our Nobel Prize.
18
00:00:34,668 --> 00:00:36,535
You come up with your own idea.
19
00:00:36,604 --> 00:00:38,504
Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
20
00:00:41,042 --> 00:00:42,341
ELLEN (over TV): Have a seat,
thanks for being here.
21
00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:44,743
I feel the same way about you.
22
00:00:44,812 --> 00:00:46,178
This is nice.
23
00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:48,981
All my friends hanging out,
watching Ellen.
24
00:00:49,050 --> 00:00:53,018
It's like, what am I gonna do
with my other two wishes?
25
00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:55,020
It's not nice.
She's having on the scientists
26
00:00:55,089 --> 00:00:57,256
who are trying to steal
our Nobel Prize.
27
00:00:57,324 --> 00:00:59,058
Although I will enjoy
watching her expose
28
00:00:59,126 --> 00:01:00,392
Pemberton and Campbell
29
00:01:00,461 --> 00:01:03,028
for the coattail-riding
frauds that they are.
30
00:01:03,097 --> 00:01:05,731
That is Ellen's brand,
gotcha journalism.
31
00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:07,699
Yeah, you should've
seen her take down
32
00:01:07,768 --> 00:01:09,201
John Krasinski last week.
33
00:01:09,270 --> 00:01:12,838
Got him to admit he loved
his wife. It was brutal.
34
00:01:12,907 --> 00:01:14,139
(shushing)
All right, our next guests
35
00:01:14,208 --> 00:01:15,841
are a couple of physicists--
don't turn the channel.
36
00:01:15,910 --> 00:01:18,510
They've been doing
some viral videos online
37
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:21,480
about what it's like to be in
the running for a Nobel Prize.
38
00:01:21,549 --> 00:01:23,582
Please welcome
Doctors Greg Pemberton
39
00:01:23,651 --> 00:01:25,117
and Kevin Campbell.
40
00:01:25,186 --> 00:01:27,853
(cheering, applause)
41
00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:31,523
Why does she even want
to have scientists on?
42
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,826
Uh, silly question. Who
else will give her audience
43
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:36,662
causal explanations of
natural phenomena?
44
00:01:36,730 --> 00:01:39,865
I love you, honey, but think.
45
00:01:39,934 --> 00:01:41,233
So you guys
46
00:01:41,302 --> 00:01:43,869
have discovered something
pretty amazing in the universe.
47
00:01:43,938 --> 00:01:46,405
Obviously, I understand, uh,
high-level physics
48
00:01:46,474 --> 00:01:49,541
because I'm a comedian, but...
(laughter)
49
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,543
...can you explain it
to the audience?
50
00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,812
Well, I don't know, I'm not
sure we're even smart enough
51
00:01:53,881 --> 00:01:55,180
to understand it.
(laughter)
52
00:01:56,951 --> 00:01:59,751
Look, look, the audience is
laughing at them. It's starting.
53
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:03,088
I hate to say it, Sheldon, but
I think the audience likes them.
54
00:02:03,157 --> 00:02:05,657
Well, that will all change
when Ellen asks them
55
00:02:05,726 --> 00:02:08,594
how super-asymmetry explains the
cosmological excess of matter
56
00:02:08,662 --> 00:02:10,496
over anti-matter
and they panic,
57
00:02:10,564 --> 00:02:13,265
like Leonard trying
to do a pull-up.
58
00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:15,000
Hey, what'd I do?
59
00:02:15,069 --> 00:02:17,836
Not a pull-up.
60
00:02:17,905 --> 00:02:19,204
People have been
loving your videos,
61
00:02:19,273 --> 00:02:21,140
especially the-the songs
that you've been posting.
62
00:02:21,208 --> 00:02:22,541
Oh, thanks.
Thank you.
63
00:02:22,610 --> 00:02:25,244
Uh, this may be pushing
it, but I have to ask.
64
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:27,846
Would you mind singing one
of those for us right now?
65
00:02:27,915 --> 00:02:30,215
Oh, why not?
All right.
66
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:33,752
Come on, Ellen, they're right
there. Go for the jugular.
67
00:02:33,854 --> 00:02:37,122
♪ Let's get physicist,
physicist ♪
68
00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:39,825
♪ I want to get physicist ♪
69
00:02:39,894 --> 00:02:42,728
♪ Let's get into physicist ♪
70
00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:45,497
♪ Let me hear your boson talk ♪
71
00:02:45,566 --> 00:02:49,234
Come on, Ellen. ♪ Let me hear
your boson talk... ♪
72
00:02:49,303 --> 00:02:52,771
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
73
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:56,074
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
74
00:02:56,143 --> 00:02:57,743
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
75
00:02:57,811 --> 00:03:00,445
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
76
00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:02,948
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
77
00:03:03,017 --> 00:03:05,651
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
78
00:03:05,719 --> 00:03:07,553
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
79
00:03:07,621 --> 00:03:09,188
♪ Bang! ♪
80
00:03:14,809 --> 00:03:16,141
Dr. Pemberton.
81
00:03:16,210 --> 00:03:17,476
Dr. Campbell.
82
00:03:17,545 --> 00:03:20,012
Doctors Pemberton and Campbell.
83
00:03:21,115 --> 00:03:22,748
Morning, buddy.
84
00:03:22,817 --> 00:03:23,983
I am not your buddy.
85
00:03:24,051 --> 00:03:26,218
What's wrong?
I'll tell you
what's wrong.
86
00:03:26,287 --> 00:03:29,121
You went on TV
and were charming.
87
00:03:29,190 --> 00:03:31,156
Thanks, man.
That's what my mom said.
88
00:03:31,225 --> 00:03:32,524
PEMBERTON:
W-Why don't you come in
89
00:03:32,593 --> 00:03:34,693
and have some parfait?
Yeah,
90
00:03:34,762 --> 00:03:36,962
we ordered it from room service;
it cost, like, 12 bucks.
91
00:03:37,031 --> 00:03:39,498
It's just yogurt in a glass.
92
00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:42,001
I don't want your yogurt.
93
00:03:42,069 --> 00:03:43,068
Then what do you want?
94
00:03:43,137 --> 00:03:44,737
I want you to hold
a press conference
95
00:03:44,805 --> 00:03:47,206
where you admit that you blindly
stumbled into super-asymmetry
96
00:03:47,275 --> 00:03:49,074
and it was really our discovery.
97
00:03:49,143 --> 00:03:51,677
Oh. No, thanks.
98
00:03:53,347 --> 00:03:55,281
You know, just because we proved
something by accident
99
00:03:55,349 --> 00:03:57,016
doesn't mean
we didn't prove it.
100
00:03:57,084 --> 00:03:58,284
PEMBERTON:
Yeah, I wasn't trying
101
00:03:58,352 --> 00:04:00,219
to prove that my wife
was cheating on me
102
00:04:00,288 --> 00:04:01,520
when I came home early
one Friday,
103
00:04:01,589 --> 00:04:04,323
but I'm still sleeping
on his couch.
104
00:04:04,392 --> 00:04:05,991
I told you,
you can do better than her.
105
00:04:06,060 --> 00:04:08,394
Thanks. It just hurts.
106
00:04:08,462 --> 00:04:10,729
And when you win that
Nobel Prize, she's gonna realize
107
00:04:10,798 --> 00:04:12,831
that she was wrong,
you are not a fraud.
108
00:04:12,900 --> 00:04:15,734
She is not wrong.
109
00:04:15,803 --> 00:04:19,071
Wow, I can't believe
you're siding with Linda.
110
00:04:19,140 --> 00:04:20,773
Shame on you.
111
00:04:25,112 --> 00:04:26,946
Look at this. They
posted another video.
112
00:04:27,014 --> 00:04:28,380
It's not even about science.
113
00:04:28,449 --> 00:04:30,149
They're on a
celebrity bus tour.
114
00:04:30,217 --> 00:04:32,284
Those are fun. I-I went on one
115
00:04:32,353 --> 00:04:34,286
and saw Tom Hanks talking
to his gardener.
116
00:04:34,355 --> 00:04:37,289
He's even nice when you plant
the wrong color azaleas.
117
00:04:38,726 --> 00:04:40,826
Those guys are good at
self-promoting, so what?
118
00:04:40,895 --> 00:04:43,128
No one ever won a Nobel
for being nice.
119
00:04:43,197 --> 00:04:44,129
KOOTHRAPPALI:
Yeah, but if they did,
120
00:04:44,198 --> 00:04:45,864
do you know who would win one?
121
00:04:45,933 --> 00:04:47,599
Are you gonna say Tom Hanks?
122
00:04:47,668 --> 00:04:51,003
He picked up a shovel
and helped the guy replant.
123
00:04:52,673 --> 00:04:53,872
SIEBERT:
Dr. Cooper,
124
00:04:53,941 --> 00:04:55,841
there you are. I just wanted
to tell you not to worry
125
00:04:55,910 --> 00:04:58,310
about this Pemberton
and Campbell publicity blitz.
126
00:04:58,379 --> 00:04:59,511
Are you worried?
127
00:04:59,580 --> 00:05:00,913
Not at all.
128
00:05:00,982 --> 00:05:03,415
Not even a little bit.
(laughs)
129
00:05:03,484 --> 00:05:06,285
Look, i-it doesn't matter
130
00:05:06,354 --> 00:05:08,320
if they have popular support,
131
00:05:08,389 --> 00:05:10,689
we're gonna get the scientific
community behind us.
132
00:05:10,758 --> 00:05:12,591
He's right, the Nobel Prize
is about the work,
133
00:05:12,660 --> 00:05:15,394
and as your fellow scientists,
we support you and Amy.
134
00:05:15,463 --> 00:05:17,596
That's great, Scooby Gang.
135
00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:20,065
Now, the university
is gonna host
136
00:05:20,134 --> 00:05:22,468
a reception for you
and Dr. Fowler
137
00:05:22,536 --> 00:05:25,904
where we invite as many
academic luminaries as we can,
138
00:05:25,973 --> 00:05:28,440
uh, give them a chance to meet
you, hear about your work.
139
00:05:28,509 --> 00:05:30,409
Uh, that's a great idea.
Uh, yeah.
140
00:05:30,478 --> 00:05:32,411
Who needs to be likable
when you have Nobel Laureates
141
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:33,645
campaigning for you?
142
00:05:33,714 --> 00:05:34,813
Oh, yeah-- wait a minute.
143
00:05:34,882 --> 00:05:36,548
Do you not think we're likable?
144
00:05:36,617 --> 00:05:38,550
That's what's great about you,
145
00:05:38,619 --> 00:05:41,353
you never stop asking
the tough questions.
146
00:05:48,062 --> 00:05:50,062
(door closes)
147
00:05:50,131 --> 00:05:51,797
Hey. Kids asleep?
148
00:05:51,866 --> 00:05:54,366
Nope. I've been trying
to get them down for hours.
149
00:05:54,435 --> 00:05:56,035
Apparently, Halley's afraid
of the dark now
150
00:05:56,103 --> 00:05:57,169
and I can't turn on
the night-light
151
00:05:57,238 --> 00:05:58,737
'cause it makes Michael cry.
152
00:05:58,806 --> 00:06:00,139
Why doesn't he like
the night-light?
153
00:06:00,207 --> 00:06:02,007
Jot that down, we can ask him
154
00:06:02,076 --> 00:06:04,810
as soon as he learns to speak.
155
00:06:04,879 --> 00:06:08,747
We can also find out what's
so damn funny about birds.
156
00:06:08,816 --> 00:06:11,116
(Halley fusses)
157
00:06:11,185 --> 00:06:12,751
I'll go talk to her.
158
00:06:12,820 --> 00:06:16,588
I don't know why she's suddenly
so afraid of everything.
159
00:06:16,657 --> 00:06:19,725
Honey, remember,
she's my child, too.
160
00:06:24,031 --> 00:06:25,464
WOLOWITZ (over monitor):
Hey, sweetie,
161
00:06:25,533 --> 00:06:27,499
I heard you were afraid
of the dark.
162
00:06:27,568 --> 00:06:31,036
I know someone else
who was afraid of the dark once.
163
00:06:31,105 --> 00:06:33,505
Your daddy,
when he was in space.
164
00:06:33,574 --> 00:06:34,840
(Wolowitz chuckles)
165
00:06:34,909 --> 00:06:38,777
And just like you,
I was wearing a full diaper.
166
00:06:40,214 --> 00:06:42,314
Hey, good news.
167
00:06:42,383 --> 00:06:45,050
They're inviting several Nobel
Laureates to our reception.
168
00:06:45,119 --> 00:06:46,785
Oh, great, like who?
169
00:06:46,854 --> 00:06:49,021
Uh... Makoto Kobayashi.
170
00:06:49,090 --> 00:06:51,156
Da-- ooh.
171
00:06:51,225 --> 00:06:53,325
What?
172
00:06:53,394 --> 00:06:54,993
Well, I may have been
less than kind to him
173
00:06:55,062 --> 00:06:57,896
about his Nobel Prize win.
174
00:06:57,965 --> 00:06:58,997
Why?
175
00:06:59,066 --> 00:07:00,999
I was jealous, angry
and new to Twitter.
176
00:07:01,068 --> 00:07:02,534
It was a dangerous combination.
177
00:07:02,603 --> 00:07:05,671
Okay, so scratch Kobayashi.
178
00:07:05,739 --> 00:07:07,739
Uh, George Smoot's on here.
179
00:07:07,808 --> 00:07:10,075
(hisses, groans)
180
00:07:10,144 --> 00:07:12,578
We have a history.
181
00:07:12,646 --> 00:07:15,080
Saul Perlmutter?
182
00:07:15,149 --> 00:07:16,515
(groans):
Oh!
183
00:07:17,618 --> 00:07:19,818
What about Kip Thorne?
184
00:07:19,887 --> 00:07:21,553
(stammers)
That was a misunderstanding.
185
00:07:21,622 --> 00:07:23,255
I didn't know
he was right behind me.
186
00:07:24,992 --> 00:07:28,260
So you've alienated everyone
we need to help us?
187
00:07:28,329 --> 00:07:30,462
Well, Amy, if I had known
that someday we'd need them,
188
00:07:30,531 --> 00:07:33,665
I would never
have insulted them.
189
00:07:33,734 --> 00:07:35,567
Well, that doesn't
make it better.
Oh.
190
00:07:35,636 --> 00:07:38,470
Well, it's also not true.
191
00:07:42,910 --> 00:07:45,844
(door opens, closes)
192
00:07:48,215 --> 00:07:50,649
Hey.
Hey.
193
00:07:50,718 --> 00:07:52,784
Oh, that's cute.
194
00:07:52,853 --> 00:07:55,454
Did Halley draw that
at preschool?
195
00:07:57,057 --> 00:07:58,323
I drew it.
196
00:07:58,392 --> 00:07:59,558
Well, good night.
197
00:08:01,695 --> 00:08:03,896
It's supposed to be
an astronaut.
198
00:08:03,964 --> 00:08:07,232
And I'm supposed to be
living on my own at this age,
199
00:08:07,301 --> 00:08:10,802
but here we are.
200
00:08:10,871 --> 00:08:13,872
Halley was scared and Howard
told her the sweetest story
201
00:08:13,941 --> 00:08:16,575
about when he was in space
and I thought I could turn it
202
00:08:16,644 --> 00:08:18,410
into a book for her and Michael.
203
00:08:18,479 --> 00:08:20,779
Oh, well, I mean,
I am an artist.
204
00:08:20,848 --> 00:08:23,415
Uh, i-if you want,
I could do the drawings.
205
00:08:23,484 --> 00:08:25,184
Really? That'd be amazing.
Yeah,
206
00:08:25,252 --> 00:08:27,085
it'd be fun. And a,
207
00:08:27,154 --> 00:08:29,421
a nice change of pace
from what I usually draw.
208
00:08:29,490 --> 00:08:30,656
What do you usually draw?
209
00:08:30,724 --> 00:08:31,690
Well, good night.
210
00:08:36,130 --> 00:08:37,763
(device chimes)
211
00:08:37,831 --> 00:08:39,331
Someone texting you?
Uh, no,
212
00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:41,333
I just met my exercise
goal for the day.
213
00:08:45,339 --> 00:08:47,372
By doing the dishes?
214
00:08:47,441 --> 00:08:49,775
Hey, you have your goals,
I have mine.
215
00:08:52,346 --> 00:08:54,112
Hello.
What are you two doing?
216
00:08:54,148 --> 00:08:56,782
Mm, just finishing a workout.
217
00:08:56,850 --> 00:08:57,950
What's up?
218
00:08:58,018 --> 00:08:59,518
Do you have any cookie dough?
219
00:08:59,587 --> 00:09:02,321
Uh, I think so. Let me see.
220
00:09:02,389 --> 00:09:07,226
Yeah, we've got, uh, chocolate
chip and oatmeal raisin.
221
00:09:07,294 --> 00:09:08,660
Oatmeal raisin?
222
00:09:08,729 --> 00:09:10,996
I know at least two things wrong
with that cookie.
223
00:09:12,633 --> 00:09:13,966
It's for the Nobel Laureates.
224
00:09:14,034 --> 00:09:17,369
We need them on our side,
but unfortunately, Sheldon...
225
00:09:17,438 --> 00:09:20,472
No. "Unfortunately, Sheldon..."
that's all you got to say.
226
00:09:20,541 --> 00:09:22,641
Well, that's-- so you need
these people's support
227
00:09:22,710 --> 00:09:24,309
and you're sending
them baked goods?
228
00:09:24,378 --> 00:09:25,811
Yeah, they're pretty smart.
229
00:09:25,879 --> 00:09:27,379
Don't you think they're gonna
realize it's just a bribe?
230
00:09:27,448 --> 00:09:29,715
No, you'd think,
but sometimes brilliant people
231
00:09:29,783 --> 00:09:32,718
can be painfully oblivious
to social cues.
232
00:09:36,190 --> 00:09:39,258
Thank you for pointing
that out, Sheldon.
233
00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:40,926
Anytime.
234
00:09:47,001 --> 00:09:49,134
"Sheldon Cooper"? Hmm.
235
00:09:54,041 --> 00:09:55,207
"Sheldon Cooper"?
236
00:09:55,276 --> 00:09:58,143
(scoffs)
Pass.
237
00:09:58,212 --> 00:10:01,880
"Sheldon Cooper." Aw.
238
00:10:01,949 --> 00:10:04,750
Ugh, oatmeal raisin?
239
00:10:04,818 --> 00:10:07,619
Ugh.
240
00:10:07,688 --> 00:10:09,388
(phone chimes)
241
00:10:09,456 --> 00:10:12,624
Oh, it's from Saul Perlmutter.
242
00:10:12,693 --> 00:10:14,026
(gasps)
He sent me a picture.
243
00:10:14,094 --> 00:10:15,394
Ooh, let me see.
244
00:10:15,462 --> 00:10:19,631
Oh, he arranged the cookies
to spell out "thank you."
245
00:10:20,768 --> 00:10:23,602
Sheldon, that word
isn't "thank."
246
00:10:29,694 --> 00:10:32,795
Hi. I got you a surprise.
247
00:10:32,864 --> 00:10:35,698
What-- Oh. (chuckles)
What's the occasion?
248
00:10:35,767 --> 00:10:37,533
I heard you tell Halley
that story the other night,
249
00:10:37,602 --> 00:10:38,801
and I thought it was
250
00:10:38,870 --> 00:10:42,138
so sweet that Stuart and I
turned it into a book.
251
00:10:42,207 --> 00:10:46,576
The Frightened Little Astronaut?
252
00:10:47,612 --> 00:10:51,013
That looks
just like you.
253
00:10:51,082 --> 00:10:54,917
Look how tiny
and scared you look.
254
00:10:54,986 --> 00:10:57,053
And the best part is,
Stuart showed it
255
00:10:57,121 --> 00:10:58,454
to a publisher
friend of his,
256
00:10:58,523 --> 00:10:59,755
and they're interested in it.
257
00:10:59,824 --> 00:11:02,925
That is so cool.
Absolutely not.
258
00:11:04,429 --> 00:11:05,494
Why?
259
00:11:05,563 --> 00:11:07,730
Because I don't want
the whole world to know
260
00:11:07,799 --> 00:11:09,999
I was the frightened
little astronaut!
261
00:11:13,471 --> 00:11:16,806
Maybe you should've called it
The Bitchy Little Astronaut.
262
00:11:21,212 --> 00:11:23,679
You want to tell me
what's going on?
263
00:11:23,748 --> 00:11:25,448
Is my distress
that obvious?
264
00:11:25,516 --> 00:11:27,483
Sheldon, please don't
take this the wrong way,
265
00:11:27,552 --> 00:11:29,151
but when you're quiet
even for a second,
266
00:11:29,220 --> 00:11:31,187
something's wrong.
267
00:11:31,256 --> 00:11:33,322
Well, it's true.
268
00:11:33,391 --> 00:11:35,992
The fact is, I feel
really bad for Amy.
269
00:11:36,060 --> 00:11:37,260
Well, we all do.
270
00:11:37,328 --> 00:11:39,996
But just for fun,
why do you?
271
00:11:40,064 --> 00:11:42,665
Well, she didn't
do anything wrong,
272
00:11:42,734 --> 00:11:45,801
but she's paying
for my mistakes.
Wow.
273
00:11:45,870 --> 00:11:47,303
What?
274
00:11:47,372 --> 00:11:50,106
No-- I'm just
honestly impressed.
275
00:11:50,174 --> 00:11:53,175
When did you start caring
about other people's feelings?
276
00:11:53,244 --> 00:11:55,745
Well, I laughed when Amy
got a shock from
277
00:11:55,813 --> 00:11:58,514
the broken Christmas tree
lights, so it was after that.
278
00:12:00,885 --> 00:12:03,986
So none of them are
coming to the reception?
279
00:12:04,055 --> 00:12:05,521
I don't think so.
280
00:12:05,590 --> 00:12:08,891
Okay, what did he say
that was so insulting?
(sighs) Well,
281
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:11,027
he may have suggested there was
282
00:12:11,095 --> 00:12:15,031
an inelegance to the quadrupole
normalization of Smoot's data.
283
00:12:15,099 --> 00:12:17,033
Damn.
284
00:12:20,204 --> 00:12:22,672
See, sometimes I wish I could
invent a time machine,
285
00:12:22,740 --> 00:12:24,707
so I could go back
and prevent myself
286
00:12:24,776 --> 00:12:26,175
from acting so rashly.
287
00:12:26,244 --> 00:12:29,845
Or moving forward, you could
think before you speak.
288
00:12:29,914 --> 00:12:32,014
I suppose so.
289
00:12:32,083 --> 00:12:35,818
But the time machine thing
is probably more likely.
290
00:12:35,887 --> 00:12:38,921
My problem is that
I don't always know
291
00:12:38,990 --> 00:12:40,890
when I've gone too far.
292
00:12:40,958 --> 00:12:43,159
Well, uh, if you like,
I could try to help you out.
293
00:12:43,227 --> 00:12:46,329
You know, and maybe let you know
if you're crossing a line.
294
00:12:46,397 --> 00:12:49,332
Oh, you mean, like,
with a code word?
Sure.
295
00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:51,901
How's "shut up"?
296
00:12:53,338 --> 00:12:55,338
That's perfect. People
say it to me all the time,
297
00:12:55,406 --> 00:12:56,505
no one will suspect.
298
00:13:00,278 --> 00:13:02,878
Hey, got a minute?
Sure. What's up?
299
00:13:02,947 --> 00:13:05,014
Uh, Bernadette said
300
00:13:05,083 --> 00:13:06,716
you weren't crazy
about the book.
301
00:13:06,784 --> 00:13:08,017
No. (chuckles)
It's great.
302
00:13:08,086 --> 00:13:09,719
I just don't want anyone
to ever see it
303
00:13:09,787 --> 00:13:11,387
or read it or know it exists.
304
00:13:11,456 --> 00:13:14,056
But this could be
really good for me,
305
00:13:14,125 --> 00:13:16,525
you know? Finally get
my artwork published.
306
00:13:16,594 --> 00:13:19,462
And-and come on,
it's a, it's a cute story.
307
00:13:19,530 --> 00:13:20,529
Oh, easy for
you to say.
308
00:13:20,598 --> 00:13:22,765
No one's gonna think
you're a coward.
309
00:13:22,834 --> 00:13:24,900
Are you kidding?
The other day
310
00:13:24,969 --> 00:13:27,803
in the comic book store,
a balloon popped and I threw up.
311
00:13:31,109 --> 00:13:33,542
Can't you just
take my name off it?
312
00:13:33,611 --> 00:13:36,746
No, uh, the only reason
the publisher's interested
313
00:13:36,814 --> 00:13:38,981
is 'cause a real astronaut
wrote it.
314
00:13:39,050 --> 00:13:42,218
Well, look, what if
we made a few changes?
315
00:13:42,286 --> 00:13:44,086
Uh, sure, yes.
316
00:13:44,155 --> 00:13:46,455
What-what do you have in mind?
Well, nothing major.
317
00:13:46,524 --> 00:13:47,890
But see here on the
cover, where it says
318
00:13:47,959 --> 00:13:49,925
"frightened little,"
what if, I don't know,
319
00:13:49,994 --> 00:13:52,962
it didn't say that?
320
00:13:53,030 --> 00:13:56,465
So, it would just be
The Astronaut?
321
00:13:56,534 --> 00:13:58,901
Yeah, you're right.
That doesn't quite pop.
322
00:13:59,003 --> 00:14:02,371
What about...
The Brave Astronaut?
323
00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:04,874
See, that's got
some zip to it!
324
00:14:05,977 --> 00:14:07,643
Okay.
325
00:14:07,712 --> 00:14:10,179
And here on this page,
where I'm crying.
326
00:14:10,248 --> 00:14:12,882
What if, instead,
I'm... punching a meteor
327
00:14:12,950 --> 00:14:16,318
into the sun with
my bare fists?
328
00:14:16,387 --> 00:14:18,287
So you have superpowers?
329
00:14:18,356 --> 00:14:21,157
I like the way
you're thinking.
330
00:14:23,928 --> 00:14:26,162
Professor Thorne?
331
00:14:26,230 --> 00:14:27,296
Dr. Hofstadter.
332
00:14:27,365 --> 00:14:28,964
Uh, you know
my wife, Penny.
333
00:14:29,033 --> 00:14:30,266
Sure. Hi.
PENNY: Hi.
334
00:14:30,334 --> 00:14:33,202
(laughs)
Uh, we wanted to talk to you
about Dr. Cooper.
335
00:14:33,271 --> 00:14:34,370
Now, before you say no...
336
00:14:34,439 --> 00:14:35,471
No.
337
00:14:37,542 --> 00:14:39,108
Well, then, after you say no.
338
00:14:39,177 --> 00:14:40,543
No.
339
00:14:40,611 --> 00:14:43,379
Okay, look, Sheldon's
a pain in the ass.
340
00:14:43,448 --> 00:14:45,114
But Dr. Fowler's
really nice.
341
00:14:45,183 --> 00:14:48,317
So if you average
them out-- math...
342
00:14:49,620 --> 00:14:51,020
...you got someone
who's okay.
343
00:14:51,088 --> 00:14:52,054
(stammers) But more
344
00:14:52,123 --> 00:14:54,857
than the person,
the Nobel is about the work.
345
00:14:54,926 --> 00:14:56,292
You should understand that
more than anyone.
346
00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:58,761
Yes, because of your work
on gravitational waves.
347
00:14:58,830 --> 00:14:59,995
You know my work?
348
00:15:00,064 --> 00:15:02,331
I do. But I'm-I'm really
hogging this conversation.
349
00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:04,166
Leonard?
(clears throat)
350
00:15:04,235 --> 00:15:05,701
Just give them a chance.
351
00:15:05,770 --> 00:15:08,337
Uh, science has a history
of difficult people.
352
00:15:08,406 --> 00:15:09,839
Look at, uh,
Newton, who was
353
00:15:09,907 --> 00:15:12,475
a jerk to Leibniz, and Leibniz,
who was a jerk to everyone.
354
00:15:12,543 --> 00:15:14,543
Yeah, you know, and I
don't need to tell you
355
00:15:14,612 --> 00:15:16,545
that gravitational waves
are disturbances
356
00:15:16,614 --> 00:15:18,380
in the curvature
of space-time.
357
00:15:18,449 --> 00:15:21,517
Or that the-- Hey, you worked
on the movie Interstellar?
358
00:15:27,558 --> 00:15:29,158
So what do you think?
359
00:15:29,227 --> 00:15:31,060
I think if you were in space
360
00:15:31,128 --> 00:15:34,263
without a shirt on, you'd die.
361
00:15:34,332 --> 00:15:36,065
Oh.
362
00:15:36,133 --> 00:15:37,600
No, I am wearing
a shirt.
363
00:15:37,668 --> 00:15:41,437
It's just skintight,
so you can see my pecs.
364
00:15:41,506 --> 00:15:43,606
When did you get pecs?
365
00:15:43,674 --> 00:15:47,776
Yesterday, when I made
Stuart add them.
366
00:15:47,845 --> 00:15:49,612
Howie, what I liked
about the other story
367
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:50,946
was that it was real.
368
00:15:51,015 --> 00:15:53,549
I mean, nothing in this
actually happened to you.
369
00:15:53,618 --> 00:15:56,118
(chuckles):
So, it's a children's book.
370
00:15:56,187 --> 00:15:57,853
I mean, cats
don't wear hats.
371
00:15:57,922 --> 00:15:59,722
And if someone gives you
green eggs, it ends
372
00:15:59,790 --> 00:16:02,291
with you on the toilet
trying to make a deal with God.
373
00:16:04,428 --> 00:16:06,462
But the real story was so sweet.
374
00:16:06,531 --> 00:16:08,564
The little astronaut
was afraid,
375
00:16:08,633 --> 00:16:11,066
but he still went to space,
and that's what made him brave.
376
00:16:11,135 --> 00:16:15,204
(scoffs) But in space,
the other astronauts...
377
00:16:15,273 --> 00:16:17,640
made fun of him,
and that's a thing
378
00:16:17,708 --> 00:16:19,542
he doesn't want to relive.
379
00:16:19,610 --> 00:16:21,277
I get that.
380
00:16:23,381 --> 00:16:25,281
I guess it would
just take a really
381
00:16:25,349 --> 00:16:27,416
brave man to put an embarrassing
story like that
382
00:16:27,485 --> 00:16:29,885
out into the world,
just so it might help
383
00:16:29,954 --> 00:16:32,288
some frightened children
not feel so alone.
384
00:16:32,356 --> 00:16:36,158
Wow. That is
quite the guilt trip.
385
00:16:38,462 --> 00:16:41,030
Are you sure you're not Jewish?
386
00:16:44,735 --> 00:16:47,403
I'm just a wife that is
so proud of her husband,
387
00:16:47,471 --> 00:16:48,904
and doesn't think
that he has anything
388
00:16:48,973 --> 00:16:51,006
to be embarrassed about.
Oh.
389
00:16:51,075 --> 00:16:53,742
You're sounding
less and less Jewish.
390
00:16:56,247 --> 00:16:58,414
Hey, we just heard that
you're the ones
391
00:16:58,482 --> 00:17:00,282
who convinced
the Nobel Laureates to come.
392
00:17:00,351 --> 00:17:01,283
Thank you.
PENNY:
You are welcome.
393
00:17:01,352 --> 00:17:02,284
You guys deserve this.
394
00:17:02,353 --> 00:17:03,385
Yeah, now get out of here,
395
00:17:03,454 --> 00:17:04,520
go talk to some
smart people.
396
00:17:05,790 --> 00:17:08,757
Wait a minute.
Yeah, sorry.
Sometimes I forget
397
00:17:08,826 --> 00:17:11,126
you're smart because
you're so sexy.
398
00:17:11,195 --> 00:17:14,430
I can see that.
Yeah.
399
00:17:14,498 --> 00:17:15,998
Dr. Cooper.
Dr. Fowler.
400
00:17:16,067 --> 00:17:18,500
I was just telling Professor
Arnold how you came up with
401
00:17:18,569 --> 00:17:20,336
super-asymmetry
at your wedding.
402
00:17:20,404 --> 00:17:22,504
It's a wonderful story.
403
00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:23,806
Ha, it really is.
404
00:17:23,874 --> 00:17:25,874
I wouldn't say it was the
highlight of the wedding,
405
00:17:25,943 --> 00:17:27,509
because I've been
told not to
406
00:17:27,578 --> 00:17:30,045
for reasons I don't
fully understand.
407
00:17:30,114 --> 00:17:32,381
Uh, but what he does understand
is how the universe works,
408
00:17:32,450 --> 00:17:33,716
and that's
what's important.
409
00:17:33,784 --> 00:17:36,318
Not what comes out
of his mouth. (laughs)
410
00:17:39,624 --> 00:17:40,623
Uh-oh.
411
00:17:40,691 --> 00:17:42,591
I haven't been to a lot of
parties like this,
412
00:17:42,660 --> 00:17:46,595
but what does a physics
rumble look like?
413
00:17:46,664 --> 00:17:48,731
Kind of like
angry chickens.
Hmm.
414
00:17:48,799 --> 00:17:52,635
Or-or-or-or like, uh,
when-when puppets fight.
415
00:17:52,703 --> 00:17:55,671
Dr. Cooper, Dr. Fowler,
good to see you.
416
00:17:55,740 --> 00:17:56,839
What are you doing here?
417
00:17:56,907 --> 00:17:58,273
Professor Smoot
invited us.
418
00:17:58,342 --> 00:17:59,908
We're Facebook friends.
Smooty!
419
00:18:02,546 --> 00:18:05,347
Well, this is our
reception, so go away.
420
00:18:05,416 --> 00:18:06,348
SHELDON:
Actually, Amy,
421
00:18:06,417 --> 00:18:08,150
I think we should
let them stay.
422
00:18:08,219 --> 00:18:09,752
Please, enjoy yourselves.
423
00:18:09,820 --> 00:18:11,487
Try some pigs
in blankets.
424
00:18:11,555 --> 00:18:13,522
And yes, that
is the plural.
425
00:18:13,591 --> 00:18:15,190
Great.
Thanks.
426
00:18:16,694 --> 00:18:17,893
What are you doing?
427
00:18:17,962 --> 00:18:19,428
If they stay,
everyone will see
428
00:18:19,497 --> 00:18:20,863
that their grasp
on super-asymmetry
429
00:18:20,931 --> 00:18:22,031
is tenuous at best.
430
00:18:22,099 --> 00:18:24,366
Oh. That's clever.
431
00:18:24,435 --> 00:18:26,869
Yeah, I don't just know
the plurals of things, Amy.
432
00:18:28,272 --> 00:18:29,638
Is this gonna be
a problem?
433
00:18:29,707 --> 00:18:31,840
Mm? No, no, no.
We have a plan.
434
00:18:31,909 --> 00:18:33,342
Uh, Dr. Campbell
and Pemberton,
435
00:18:33,411 --> 00:18:35,577
settle a bet for
Dr. Fowler and me?
436
00:18:35,646 --> 00:18:37,846
We were just discussing,
under what conditions
437
00:18:37,915 --> 00:18:39,982
the radiative corrections
to super-asymmetry
438
00:18:40,051 --> 00:18:42,184
could cause time
variation of alpha E.M.?
439
00:18:42,253 --> 00:18:46,055
AMY:
I say active galactic nuclei
at cosmological distances
440
00:18:46,123 --> 00:18:47,523
show a part per
million deviation.
441
00:18:47,591 --> 00:18:49,024
Dr. Cooper says
442
00:18:49,093 --> 00:18:52,127
this has been disproven recently
with quasar observations.
443
00:18:52,196 --> 00:18:53,295
What do you think?
444
00:18:58,502 --> 00:18:59,968
I agree with you.
445
00:19:02,506 --> 00:19:03,772
Good answer.
446
00:19:05,142 --> 00:19:06,408
Hey, uh, if we haven't
said it before,
447
00:19:06,477 --> 00:19:09,645
we just want to say...
thank you.
448
00:19:09,714 --> 00:19:12,147
Yeah. We couldn't have proven
super-asymmetry without you.
449
00:19:12,216 --> 00:19:13,916
Wait-wait. You all
heard them say it.
450
00:19:13,984 --> 00:19:15,150
They didn't do anything.
451
00:19:16,387 --> 00:19:18,954
Sheldon. Shut up.
Yeah-- Well, that's rude.
452
00:19:19,023 --> 00:19:20,456
No. Shut up.
453
00:19:20,524 --> 00:19:23,459
Oh, the code
word, thank you.
454
00:19:23,527 --> 00:19:24,827
You know, it's strange.
A few months ago,
455
00:19:24,895 --> 00:19:26,628
nobody paid any attention to us,
and now all of a sudden,
456
00:19:26,697 --> 00:19:28,163
we're getting all
these accolades.
457
00:19:28,232 --> 00:19:29,932
Yeah, have-have any
of you ever felt like
458
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,333
maybe you didn't
deserve it?
459
00:19:31,402 --> 00:19:33,035
Leonard, there's
something I need to say.
460
00:19:33,104 --> 00:19:35,637
Shut up.
Okay.
461
00:19:35,706 --> 00:19:38,307
It's crazy. We conclusively
proved super-asymmetry,
462
00:19:38,375 --> 00:19:41,310
and yet somehow we,
we still feel like imposters.
463
00:19:41,378 --> 00:19:42,911
There should be
a term for that.
464
00:19:42,980 --> 00:19:45,614
Oh, for crying out loud,
there is a term for that!
465
00:19:45,683 --> 00:19:47,750
It's called
"imposter syndrome"
466
00:19:47,818 --> 00:19:49,118
and you don't have it!
467
00:19:49,186 --> 00:19:50,919
Because you can't have it
if you are imposters,
468
00:19:50,988 --> 00:19:52,087
and you are!
469
00:19:52,156 --> 00:19:53,956
We're the ones
470
00:19:54,024 --> 00:19:54,990
who discovered super-asymmetry!
471
00:19:55,059 --> 00:19:56,125
So if anyone's
gonna feel like
472
00:19:56,193 --> 00:19:57,359
they have
imposter syndrome,
473
00:19:57,428 --> 00:20:01,163
it's us, because we're not
imposters! They are!
474
00:20:01,232 --> 00:20:03,966
You're imposters
and you're frauds!
475
00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:11,974
Is that what I would've
sounded like?
Yeah.
476
00:20:12,042 --> 00:20:13,575
Yikes!
477
00:20:17,582 --> 00:20:20,350
a time,
there was a little astronaut
478
00:20:20,419 --> 00:20:23,420
who was sitting in a rocket waiting to go to space."
479
00:20:23,455 --> 00:20:24,754
MAN (over radio):
Three... two... one...
480
00:20:24,823 --> 00:20:26,823
WOLOWITZ: And while all the other astronauts
481
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:29,526
laughed and joked, he stayed quiet,
482
00:20:29,594 --> 00:20:31,161
because he had a secret.
483
00:20:31,229 --> 00:20:34,664
He was scared. He had another secret, too.
484
00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:38,368
He was only pretending to be scared to trick the alien king.
485
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:40,303
Ha-ha!
486
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:42,372
BERNADETTE:
Howie.
487
00:20:43,508 --> 00:20:45,041
Fine.
488
00:20:45,110 --> 00:20:47,177
There was no alien.
(chuckles)
489
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,981
There was a bossy wife, though.
We'll get to her later.
490
00:20:53,485 --> 00:20:55,485
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