Original subtitles

CHECK OUT THE YO-YO.

WHAT A DORK.

THERE'S THE YO-YO KID.

OH, MY GOSH. I CAN'T BELIEVE HE BROUGHT IT TO SCHOOL.

WILL!

HOW'S IT GOIN'?

GREAT, CHUCKIE.

POSITIVELY GREAT.

REALLY? ISN'T TODAY REPORT CARD DAY?

YEP. AND ONCE AGAIN, I'LL SHOW YOU

THAT THE WILL BROWNING METHOD OF SLIDING BY

JUST CAN'T BE BEAT.

SUCH CONFIDENCE. I LOVE IT.

WATCH AND LEARN, CHUCKIE. WATCH AND LEARN.

OH, HI, WILL.

IS THIS YOUR LOCKER?

MAYBE. WHY?

WELL, I MOVED MY LOCKER HERE.

I WANTED TO CHANGE MY LOUSY SPOT.

SO, WILL, I WAS JUST WONDERING--

I MEAN, WITH THE JUNIOR SOCIAL JUST AROUND THE CORNER--

SORRY, HEATHER. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DANCE.

I GOTTA GO. WE'LL TALK SOMETIME, THOUGH.

DO LUNCH.

REALLY? WHEN?

UH, SOMETIME.

DO LUNCH? WHO ARE YOU, TOM CRUISE?

IT'S AN EXPRESSION. IT MEANS, MAYBE NEXT MILLENNIUM.

AND AS I GIVE YOU YOUR REPORT CARDS,

I THINK THIS IS A GOOD TIME TO REMIND YOU

THAT YOUR SCIENCE PROJECTS ARE DUE IN THREE WEEKS.

I GOT IT COVERED.

FOR SOME OF YOU

THE PROJECT IS VERY, VERY, VERY IMPORTANT.

BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T GET AT LEAST A "B,"

I'LL BE SEEING YOU AGAIN IN THIS CLASS NEXT YEAR.

THAT BAD?

NAH. IT'S NO BIGGIE.

WATCH IT, BROWNING.

SCOTTIE DESOTA.

MAN, DOES HE HATE YOU!

I GET THE GUY IN TROUBLE ONCE

AND HE HOLDS A GRUDGE FOREVER.

TROUBLE? YOU GOT HIM SUSPENDED.

THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

I BETTER GET HOME AND WORK ON MY SCIENCE PROJECT.

WHATEVER IT IS, THROW IT AWAY

AND DO A REAL ONE, WILL.

YOU GOTTA NAIL IT.

COME ON. WHO NEEDS AN "A," ANYWAY?

UH, YOU DO.

VOILA!

DOES IT HAVE A NAME?

OH, IT'S OAT BRAN WITH SOME VARIETAL TREE BARK.

IT PROMOTES HEALING, PEACE,

AND TOGETHERNESS.

HONEY, WE HAVE NO PLATES.

NO, NO. WE DON'T NEED PLATES.

THIS IS A COMMON POT.

WE ALL EAT FROM IT.

IT'S A FAMILY BONDING THING.

YEAH, RIGHT.

MAYBE WITH SOME GLUE,

YOU COULD BOND ME AND GOOFBALL.

ALLANA.

SO, WHERE ARE WE GOING ON OUR NEXT FAMILY VACATION?

I LOVE IT WHEN WE TRAVEL TOGETHER.

ANYONE WANT TO SEE MY REPORT CARD?

I CAN HARDLY WAIT.

UM, ALLANA, THIS IS TERRIFIC.

I GUESS IT RUNS IN THE FAMILY.

RIGHT, WILL?

ALLANA.

THERE MUST BE SOME MISTAKE.

A "D" IS SCIENCE. AN "F" IN SOCIAL STUDIES?

SOCIAL STUDIES, WILL?

YOU CAN GET AT LEAST A "C" IN SOCIAL STUDIES

IF YOU ANSWER EVERY QUESTION "WASHINGTON."

AND THE SAME COMMENTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

"DOESN'T APPLY HIMSELF."

"NOT ENOUGH EFFORT." "NOT TRYING."

I TRY. YOU KNOW I TRY.

BUT, WILL, IF YOU'RE TRYING,

WHY DO ALL YOUR TEACHERS SAY YOU AREN'T?

YOU LEAVE US NO CHOICE--

WE HAVE TO GO TO PLAN "B."

PLAN "B"?

I'M NOT GONNA LIKE PLAN "B," AM I?

CAMP SPARTICUS.

YES!

NO! PLEASE! ANYTHING BUT THAT!

IT'S A PRISON CAMP!

IT'S A HIGHLY RESPECTED SUMMER BOOT CAMP FOR BOYS.

IT'S NOT A PUNISHMENT.

A SUMMER AT CAMP SPARTICUS WILL TEACH YOU DISCIPLINE AND RESPONSIBILITY.

IT'LL TEACH YOU TO PUSH YOURSELF.

IT'LL TURN ME INTO A MINDLESS, UNIFORM-WEARING MACHINE.

COOL.

NO MORE DISCUSSION, WILL.

UNLESS WE SEE A SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT IN YOUR GRADES,

YOU'LL BE SPENDING THE SUMMER AT CAMP SPARTICUS.

IT'S UP TO YOU.

SPARTICUS, THE CAMP OF MISERY AND DESPAIR?

WHAT AM I GONNA DO?

HOW 'BOUT SCHOOL WORK?

MAYBE START WITH YOUR SCIENCE PROJECT.

I MEAN, APPLY YOURSELF FOR A CHANGE.

WHO ARE YOU, MY ANNOYING THIRD PARENT?

NO, JUST A GUY WHO DOESN'T WANT TO SPEND HIS SUMMER

WITHOUT HIS BEST FRIEND.

[ Knocking ]

I GOTTA GO. BYE.

MOM, DO YOU THINK CAMP SPARTICUS WILL STILL LET ME IN

IF I CAN SOMEHOW MAKE ONE LEG SHORTER THAN THE OTHER?

IT'S A PRETTY CLEVER IDEA.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD USE SOME OF THAT BRAIN POWER

ON YOUR SCHOOL WORK, HUH?

WHATTA YA THINK?

SORRY, MOM. ALLANA GETS "A"s, NOT ME.

SWEETHEART, I DON'T CARE ABOUT "A"s.

I CARE ABOUT EFFORT.

AND SO DOES YOUR DAD.

HE CARES VERY MUCH.

JUST TRY, WILL. THAT'S ALL WE ASK.

DON'T HOLD BACK SO MUCH.

YOU ARE A WONDERFUL, SMART, TALENTED GUY.

LET PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT IT.

THAT'S ALL I WANTED TO SAY.

GOODNIGHT, SWEETHEART.

"GROW YOUR OWN FUN!"

HELLO, SCIENCE PROJECT.

"OCEAN PUPS"

ONE BECOMES TWO, VICTOR.

HYPERCLONING.

THE GREATEST ADVANCE IN SCIENCE IN 100 YEARS.

WE'RE GONNA BE FILTHY RICH.

CONRAD, HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU?

IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MONEY.

IT'S ABOUT EVERYTHING WE CAN BUY WITH IT.

THAT'S RIGHT.

SOON WE'LL BE OUT OF THIS MISERABLE PLACE.

WE WON'T HAVE TO USE THIS COMPANY AS A FRONT

TO HIDE OUR RESEARCH ANYMORE.

WE'RE GONNA WORK IN A HI-TECH LABORATORY.

WITH REAL WHITE LAB COATS.

AND LAB ASSISTANTS.

WITH NAME TAGS.

GRAPE JUICE?

HMMM.

YES!

"SCIENCE HAS NEVER BEEN THIS MUCH FUN."

"THESE PETS ARE SURE TO AMAZE."

I'M READY TO BE AMAZED.

"THE WATER TEMPERATURE MUST BE MORE THAN 68

BUT LESS THAN 75 DEGREES."

PERFECT. 72 DEGREES.

NEXT, THE EGGS...

DON'T LET ME DOWN, BOYS.

MY SUMMER RESTS ON YOUR LITTLE LEGS.

OR WHATEVER YOU GOT.

WEIRD-LOOKING THINGS.

WHERE'S THE STIRRER?

GUESS A LITTLE OF MY HAIR WON'T HURT.

NOW WHAT?

"YOU SHOULD SEE SOME RESULTS

WITHIN THE NEXT 48-72 HOURS"?

TWO DAYS?

OR LESS.

CUSTOMER SERVICE. I NEED CUSTOMER SERVICE.

[ Ringing ]

OCEAN PUP. "YOU PROVIDE THE WATER, WE PROVIDE THE FUN."

YEAH, HI. MY NAME'S WILLIAM BROWNING

AND I JUST USED A KIT I ORDERED--

WAS IT SATISFACTORY?

I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN I GOT FLASHING LIGHTS AND WATER SPOUTS--

LIGHTS AND SPOUTS?

OK, MR. BROWNING, LET ME GET MY HANDBOOK.

[ Both Screaming ]

AAAH!

MR. BROWNING, THERE'S NOTHING IN THE HANDBOOK

RELATING TO YOUR PARTICULAR PROBLEM.

WHAT?!

WELL, I'VE DONE AN EXHAUSTIVE SEARCH

THROUGH ALL OF OUR DATABASES.

I ALSO CHECKED THE INDEXES OF EARLIER MANUALS FOR OUR KIT--

WHAT?!

I EVEN CONSULTED OUR RESEARCH DEPARTMENT

AND THEY CONFIRMED THAT THE HANDBOOK

DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT LIGHTS AND SPOUTS.

DON'T!

NO, IT DON'T.

MAYBE YOU COULD DESCRIBE YOUR PROBLEM AGAIN.

NO. PUT IT DOWN.

NO? NO!

SIR, ARE YOU THERE?

YEP. I'M HERE.

SIR, HELLO?

GOTTA GO. LOVE YOUR KIT. BYE.

WE GOTTA TALK.

FOR STARTERS...

PUT THAT ON.

NO. NOT LIKE THAT.

LIKE... THAT.

YOU LOOK JUST LIKE ME.

ME?

YOU SPEAK?

SPEAK?

THIS IS TOO WEIRD.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

I MEAN, WHERE'D YOU COME FROM?

MISS PINKERSON TALKED ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS IN SCIENCE CLASS.

"CLONING: THE CREATION BY LABORATORY TECHNIQUE OF AN ORGANISM

THAT IS AN IDENTICAL COPY OF ITS PARENT."

HOLY "A" IN SCIENCE CLASS!

I MADE MYSELF A CLONE!

THE GREATEST SCIENCE PROJECT EVER!

"THE SCIENCE OF CLONING IS STILL IN ITS INFANCY."

YOU CAN READ?

INTENSE.

MY PARENTS ARE HOME.

ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP.

IN A FEW MINUTES I'M GONNA HAVE TO GO DOWNSTAIRS

AND SCARF SOME DINNER.

SCARF?

EAT. CONSUME.

IT'S ALL IN THERE. READ ABOUT IT.

AND STAY HERE.

PUT ON SOME CLOTHES.

PUT ON SOME CLOTHES.

KEEP QUIET.

AND KEEP QUIET. SHHH.

IT WAS A STRANGE PHONE CALL.

I MEAN, THE KID, HE SOUNDED SO STRANGE.

I THOUGHT IT WAS WORTH SAYING SOMETHING.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS ARE DOING IN THERE, ANYWAY.

I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD'VE GOTTEN RID OF THESE ANIMALS!

GAME OVER, PAL. THAT'S IT.

OUR SECRET'S OUT. POOF. GONE.

GONE TO SOME KID NAMED...

WILL BROWNING.

THE KID JUST GOT A WEIRD REACTION.

IT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING.

WHAT IF HE ACCIDENTALLY CLONES SOMETHING?

HIS DOG OR HIS CAT?

WE DON'T HAVE PATENTS, REMEMBER?

"WE DON'T NEED THEM YET," YOU SAID.

"NO ONE WILL EVER FIND OUT ABOUT HYPERCLONING," YOU SAID.

FEEL BETTER?

MUCH BETTER.

SORRY ABOUT THAT.

SO WHAT'S OUR NEXT MOVE?

WE'RE TAKING A ROAD TRIP.

WELL, WILL, WHAT'S THE SCIENCE PROJECT YOU'VE BEEN WORKING ON?

I'D RATHER NOT SAY.

I DON'T WANT TO JINX IT.

HA. DING, DING, DING.

THAT MEANS, FOR OUR HOME VIEWING AUDIENCE,

THAT WILL ISN'T WORKING ON ANY PROJECT AT ALL.

I HAPPEN TO BE WORKING VERY HARD ON ONE.

DONE!

DONE.

WE HAVE A WINNER AND A NEW CHAMPION.

AND HERE ARE YOUR PRIZES.

A BRAND NEW REFRIGERATOR,

A BRAND NEW FREEZER--

YEAH, CRANKING IT UP ON THE DARK SIDE

IS THE NEW SHAWN PEAK KICKER,

WITH HIS LATEST FABLED ADDITION

TO HIS MULTI, MULTI-PLATINUM CATALOG.

NOW STAY IN THERE, LITTLE BIGBEES.

BIGBEE.

WE'VE GOT LOTS MORE HITS COMING YOUR WAY.

[ Both Screaming ]

WHAT? WHAT'S WRONG?

UH, NOTHING. I'M FINE.

WILL, YOU SCREAMED.

SCREAMING IMPLIES SOMETHING BAD.

NO, I JUST SCREAMED.

A LITTLE.

MAY I BE EXCUSED?

BEFORE DESSERT? I MADE RUTABAGA POPSICLES.

TEMPTING, BUT CAN I GO?

HELLO?

WHERE ARE YOU?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE?

WHO'S THAT?

THAT?

IT'S JUST A MASK.

IT'S NOT REAL. SEE?

OOOOOH. GRRRRR.

IT'S FAKE. JUST PRETEND.

FOR HALLOWEEN.

IT SCARED ME.

I SCREAMED.

WHOA. TALK ABOUT SCARY.

THE UNDERWEAR GOES IN THE INSIDE.

AND YOU GOTTA KILL THE TIE.

KILL IT?

TAKE IT OFF. LOSE IT.

YOU KNOW, I SCREAMED TOO.

AT DINNER.

WELL, WHY DID YOU SCREAM?

YOU KNOW HOW TWINS CAN SUPPOSEDLY

COMMUNICATE PSYCHICALLY OR SOMETHING?

NO.

YEAH, WELL...

NEVER MIND.

WHAT WERE YOU DOING IN THE CLOSET, ANYWAY?

I TOLD YOU TO LOOK AT THE BOOK.

I FINISHED THAT BOOK.

YOU READ THE WHOLE THING?

NO WAY.

YES WAY.

THE CHAPTER ON THE CLASSIFICATION OF MATTER-- INTENSE.

ALL RIGHT, TELL ME ABOUT AZURITE.

AZURITE. A BLUE MINERAL WITH THE FORMULA Cu3(OH)2(CO3)2.

IT IS OFTEN ASSOCIATED WITH THE GREEN MINERAL MALACHITE,

SINCE THEY'VE BOTH BEEN USED AS PIGMENTS AND AS GEMSTONES.

YOU'RE A GENUS!

NOW WHAT?

I NEED TO SCARF.

OH, RIGHT. I MEAN, YOU MUST BE HUNGRY,

BEING NEW TO THE PLANET, AND ALL.

I'LL GET YOU SOME FOOD. IT'LL ONLY TAKE A SECOND.

SO STAY RIGHT HERE.

WILL?

WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS?

IT'S A PICTURE OF MY FAMILY.

AND MY FAMILY?

NO. MY FAMILY.

ALTHOUGH, IF YOU WANT 'EM...

NOW GET BACK IN MY ROOM.

I'VE GOT TO KEEP YOU HIDDEN UNTIL I KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO WITH YOU.

Allana: YOU BETTER NOT BE IN THE BATHROOM.

MY SISTER! COME ON.

AND STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF, DIP BOY.

YOU'RE NOT THAT INTERESTING.

SHHH. QUIET.

C'MON, C'MON.

STAY CLOSE. FOLLOW ME.

HONEY, THIS CALCULATOR'S DYING ON ME.

BATTERIES ARE IN THE UTILITY ROOM. RIGHT HAND DOOR.

GET OVER THERE.

PSSST. C'MON.

FIND 'EM?

FOUND THEM.

OH, NO.

OH. HI, WILL.

HOW'S IT GOIN'?

FINE.

AAH!

WEREN'T YOU JUST...

WHY ARE YOU...

DIDN'T YOU...

WEREN'T YOU JUST WEARING--

NO, NO. I'M JUST...

HONEY, COULD YOU JUST...

OPEN THE FRIDGE DOOR?

PLEASE?

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

TO THE KITCHEN.

WHY? TO GET A SNACK.

YOU JUST ATE DINNER.

I'M HUNGRY.

SNACKS ARE BAD FOR YOU.

ARE YOU KIDDING?

WITH YOUR MOTHER'S COOKING,

SNACKS ARE WHAT KEEP ME ALIVE.

RIGHT.

EXCUSE ME.

OOH.

OF COURSE YOU CAN.

I'LL JUST REHEAT IT.

WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO?

JUST STAY WITH ME.

WAIT A SECOND. WEREN'T...

WHAT'S YOUR MOTHER PUTTING IN THIS FOOD, ANYWAY?

UPSTAIRS. MY ROOM. GO.

OH, CHOLESTEROL.

SWEETHEART...

HI, HONEY.

WILL?

HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE?

I... DROPPED A...

THING.

I'LL BE LEAVING NOW.

JUST, UH, EATING SOME...

YUMMY LEFTOVERS.

YUMMY.

IT'S EVEN BETTER COLD.

SUCKING UP TO MOM TO SAVE YOUR LIFE

WHEN YOUR GRADES TANK?

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO.

ALLANA, YOU CAN'T BEGIN TO FATHOM WHAT I'M UP TO.

HMMM.

ENJOY THAT, HUH?

UH-HUH.

I GUESS IT TAKES ALL KINDS.

[ Burps ]

I'M LOSING AIR.

THAT WAS A BURP.

A BELCH. PERFECTLY NORMAL.

YOU'VE GOT NO LEAKS.

WATCH...

[ Burps ] SEE?

ANYTHING YOU WANT TO KNOW ABOUT BODILY FUNCTIONS, JUST ASK.

[ Yawns ]

WHAT WAS THAT?

A YAWN. IT MEANS YOU'RE TIRED.

ALL THAT RUNNING AROUND MUST'VE GOTTEN TO YOU.

YOU'VE HAD A BIG DAY.

WAS IT A BIG DAY FOR YOU TOO?

THE BIGGEST DAY OF MY LIFE, SO FAR.

EVEN BIGGER THAN WHEN I GOT MY TONSILS REMOVED.

THE TONSILS PLAY NO PART IN THE HUMAN BODY.

THEY AND THE SPLEEN ARE THE ONLY ORGANS

THAT CAN BE REMOVED WITH NO CONCERN.

THAT'S WHAT YOUR BOOK SAID.

IT'S SO AMAZING.

YOU LOOK LIKE ME, YOU TALK LIKE ME,

BUT YOU HAVE A COMPUTER BRAIN.

IT'S YOUR BRAIN TOO.

IT'S GOTTA BE.

I'M YOUR CLONE.

HEY, WHATTA I CALL YOU?

THE OTHER ME?

WILL TWO?

TWOIE?

TWOIE.

TWOIE?

WILLIAM?

[ Knocking ]

HONEY, ARE YOU ASLEEP ALREADY?

I LOVE YOU, SWEETHEART.

GOODNIGHT.

SHE THOUGHT YOU WERE ME.

I AM SUCH A GENIUS.

GET SOME SLEEP, MY FRIEND.

'CAUSE COME MONDAY,

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SCHOOL AS MY SCIENCE PROJECT,

YOU'RE GOING TO SCHOOL AS ME.

[ Sighs ] OH!

DON'T TELL ME WE'RE ACTUALLY HERE.

YOU AND YOUR COMPUTER MAPS.

I'M NOT IN THE MOOD.

SO LET'S JUST RAID THE PLACE

AND FIGURE OUT WHAT THE KID CLONED.

[ Blows Horn ]

TWO WORDS-- BREAKING AND ENTERING.

THEY'RE BAD WHEN YOU USE THEM TOGETHER.

FIRST, WE OBSERVE.

OBSERVE?

WE DROVE HALFWAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY TO OBSERVE?

OBSERVE WHAT?

WE LOOK FOR TWO OF ANYTHING.

TWO POODLES, TWO HOUSE CATS, TWO HAMSTERS...

WHERE ARE WE GOING NOW?

TO LOAD UP ON COFFEE

AND POORLY PREPARED FAST FOOD.

WE ARE ON A STAKEOUT.

A FAMILY OF GRIZZLY BEARS HAS CHOSEN THIS SPOT TO TEST THE FISHING.

THE FAMILY UNIT IS ESSENTIAL

TO THE SURVIVAL OF THE CUBS,

WHO ARE JUST BEGINNING TO EXPLORE THE WORLD AROUND THEM.

SOMEBODY SAY AMEN.

AMEN!

AMEN! AMEN!

DID I HEAR YOU SHOUT "AMEN"?

MAYBE.

WELL, WE'RE WAITING FOR YOU,

SO HURRY UP.

ALL RIGHT, NOW LISTEN UP.

I'VE GOTTA GO VISIT GRANDPA MORDECHAI IN THE NURSING HOME.

HE'S YOUR FAMILY?

YEP. OLD, OLD, OLD FAMILY.

FAMILY IS GOOD.

THE FAMILY UNIT IS ESSENTIAL TO THE SURVIVAL OF THE CUBS.

THE FAMILY UNITS ARE WHAT SEND YOU TO BOOT CAMP.

I'LL BE BACK IN A FEW HOURS.

JUST WATCH TV.

FAMILY.

LIKE THE GRIZZLY BEAR,

I MUST EXPLORE THE WORLD AROUND ME.

HI, DAD.

HEY, MORDECHAI. HOW YA DOIN' TODAY?

WE BROUGHT THE KIDS ALONG, MORDECHAI.

HI, GRANDPA.

HI, GRAMPS.

HE'S IN HIS ZONE AGAIN.

TWOIE?

TWOIE?

OK, THINK. WHERE COULD HE BE?

HEY, CAN I PLAY? CAN I PLAY?

GRASS...

PICNICS.

THE PARK!

ALL RIGHT, GO GET IT.

NICE CATCH!

ALL RIGHT, BRING IT HERE, BOY.

HEY, CAN I PLAY?

MOM!

TWOIE.

TWOIE!

HI. ISN'T THIS PLACE GREAT?

I TOLD YOU NOT TO LEAVE THE HOUSE.

YOU SAID, "WATCH TV."

I DID THAT.

YOU GOTTA START USING YOUR HEAD!

I COULDN'T FIND YOU.

HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS HERE?

IT JUST CAME TO ME.

LIKE WHEN YOU WERE SCARED AND I SCREAMED.

SAME THING.

DO I HAVE A FAMILY?

NO, I HAVE A FAMILY.

YOU... YOU'RE JUST A CLONE.

LET'S GET OUTTA HERE.

STAY A BLOCK BEHIND ME,

THEN WAIT IN THE GARAGE TILL I GET YOU.

I'VE GOT TO START TEACHING YOU THE FINE ART OF BEING ME.

NOW, SHOW ME THE WALK.

OK.

LET'S SEE SOME ATTITUDE THIS TIME.

HOW WAS THAT?

UP...DOWN...

YOOO! OW.

RAY CORNING. HE'S IN MATH CLASS.

HE SMELLS LIKE CABBAGE.

NEXT, SCOTTIE DESOTA.

WE GOT HIM SUSPENDED. WE DON'T LIKE HIM.

VERY GOOD. YOU'LL BE OK.

ALL RIGHT, HIGH FIVE.

OOPS.

SORRY.

MY FAULT.

NO, NO, NO. YOU DON'T JUST WALK UP TO GIRLS

AND SAY, HEY, BABY.

BUT THE MAN ON TELEVISION DID.

THAT WAS AN OLD MOVIE.

DIDN'T YOU NOTICE IT WAS IN BLACK AND WHITE?

YOU MEAN NEW YORK CITY DOESN'T LOOK LIKE THAT?

SOMETIMES YOU SOUND SO SMART,

I'M AFRAID YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A GEEK.

AND SOMETIMES...

I'M SORRY, WILL. I'M REALLY TRYING.

MY SISTER!

TWOIE!

TWOIE!

UUH!

WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO, GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK?

WHAT'S YOUR MALFUNCTION, TOAD?

DARK.

WHAT?

YOU ARE MULTI, MULTI, ALL THE WAY TO THE PEAK KICKER.

YOU ARE ONE CRANKIN' LITTLE BIGBEE.

ALL THE WAY TO THE FABLED ADDITION.

OH, I JUST HOPE I'M AROUND WHEN YOU DO THAT IN PUBLIC.

HOW DID A CLONE LIKE YOU KNOW STUFF LIKE THAT?

A THING CALLED A MUSIC VIDEO.

YEAH, WELL, YOU'VE GOT TO LEARN TO KEEP THAT STUFF TO YOURSELF.

I MEAN, SHE LAUGHED AT YOU.

THAT WAS THE WORST.

WHY IS THAT THE WORST?

WHY?

WELL... BECAUSE IT IS. TRUST ME.

NOW WE'VE STILL GOT A LOT OF WORK AHEAD OF US.

WHO'S THIS NEXT TO ME?

CHUCKIE. HE'S MY BEST FRIEND.

WHO'S THIS ON THE OTHER SIDE?

HEATHER JOHNSON.

SHE'S GOT A RIGHTEOUS CRUSH ON ME.

PERFECT. NOW, MY MOM'S IN THE KITCHEN.

CRUISE THROUGH. SAY, GOTTA GO.

GIVE MY MOM A KISS, GO OUT THE DOOR.

GOTTA GO, KISS, OUT THE DOOR. GOT IT?

GOT IT.

HANG IT OVER ONE SHOULDER.

WILL, HONEY, I MADE SPROUT MUFFINS FOR BREAKFAST.

GOTTA GO. KISS. OUT THE DOOR.

WHAT DID YOU SAY?

GOTTA GO. KISS. OUT THE DOOR.

HE'S GOTTA BE FROM A DIFFERENT GENE POOL.

WILL! HEY, BUDDY.

CHUCKIE?

I MEAN, CHUCKIE.

HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU THIS WEEKEND?

I CALLED A FEW TIMES BUT YOU NEVER CALLED BACK.

WHAT WERE YOU, BUSY?

YEAH, BUSY.

AND NOW I FEEL LIKE SOMETHING'S CRAWLING IN MY STOMACH.

DID YOU EAT SOMETHING BAD?

NO, I JUST FEEL STRANGE.

NERVOUS, EXCITED.

YOU SURE YOU'RE OK?

SURE, PEAK KICKER TO THE MAX.

OK, THEN.

SO FAR, SO GOOD.

THIS PLACE LOOKS GREAT.

WHY DO I HATE IT SO MUCH?

MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'RE CONSTANTLY ON THE VERGE OF FAILING EVERY SUBJECT.

THIS IS GONNA BE COOL.

♪ I'M TRYING TO DANCE WITH MY FEET ON THE FLOOR ♪

♪ SEEMS A LITTLE LIKE I'VE NEVER DONE THAT BEFORE ♪

♪ THIS SMILE, IT JUST WON'T QUIT ♪

♪ TODAY'S MY DAY ♪

♪ AND I'M TAKING IT ♪

♪ FEELS LIKE I'M WALKING ON THE MOON ♪

♪ OR FLOATING HIGH IN A BIG BALLOON ♪

♪ EVERYTHING FEELS LIKE NEW ♪

♪ THERE'S A JUMP IN MY STEP ♪

♪ I'VE GOT NOTHING TO LOSE ♪

♪ EVERYTHING FEELS LIKE NEW TODAY ♪

♪ AND I LIKE IT LIKE THAT ♪

WILL, MAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

DONE!

♪ SO MUCH FUN SEEING THROUGH THESE EYES ♪

♪ THE WORLD CAN HAND ME ANYTHING ♪

♪ I'LL TRY IT ON FOR SIZE ♪

♪ GOT THE SUN, GOT MY FRIENDS ♪

♪ HOPE THIS DAY NEVER ENDS ♪

♪ IT'S CRAZY BUT YOU KNOW THAT IT'S TRUE ♪

♪ YEAH, YEAH ♪

♪ EVERYTHING FEELS LIKE NEW ♪

♪ THERE'S A JUMP IN MY STEP ♪

♪ I'VE GOT NOTHING TO LOSE ♪

♪ EVERYTHING FEELS LIKE NEW TODAY ♪

♪ AND I LIKE IT LIKE THAT ♪♪

PIZZA, RIGHT?

UM, YES, WILL.

DOUGH BAKED AT HIGH TEMPERATURES,

TOMATO SAUCE AND CHEESE.

SOMETIMES THEY'RE TOPPED WITH MEAT,

LIKE PEPPERONI AND SAUSAGE.

OK, THAT'S IT. LOOK, WE GOTTA TALK.

YOU'VE BEEN ACTING STRANGE ALL DAY.

IF YOU'RE TRYING TO PULL SOMETHIN',

YOU KNOW, LIKE TO GET YOUR GRADES CHANGED

ON ACCOUNT OF BEING CRAZY,

LET ME KNOW SO I CAN BACK YOU UP.

BUT IF NOT, I'D APPRECIATE IT IF YOU'D TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON.

YOU'RE ANGRY.

ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?

WHAT?

YEAH, OF COURSE,

BUT FRIENDS HAVE TO BE ABLE TO TELL EACH OTHER

WHEN ONE IS MAKING A REALLY BIG BONEHEAD OF HIMSELF.

SO I GUESS WE'RE GOOD FRIENDS.

I GUESS SO.

YEAH, WE ARE.

THIS IS DELICIOUS!

IT'S ONLY A FROZEN PIZZA.

NO. I MEAN, I'VE NEVER TASTED ANYTHING

SO UNBELIEVABLY DELICIOUS!

FROZEN PIZZA ROCKS!

UH, WILL...

ALL RIGHT.

♪ BRINGIN' DA NOISE ♪

♪ BRING DOWN THE HOUSE ♪

♪ WE CAME HERE TO TURN THE PARTY OUT ♪

♪ SAY COME ON, COME ON ♪

♪ LET'S RAISE THE ROOF AND GIVE 'EM PROOF ♪

♪ THAT WE CAN GET LOOSE, Y'ALL ♪

♪ BRINGIN' DA NOISE ♪

♪ BRING DOWN THE HOUSE ♪

♪ WE CAME HERE TO TURN THE PARTY OUT ♪

♪ SAY COME ON, COME ON ♪

♪ LET'S RAISE THE ROOF AND GIVE 'EM PROOF ♪

♪ THAT WE CAN GET LOOSE, Y'ALL ♪

♪ WE NEED TO GET DOWN ♪

♪ THE SCENE IS SET SO RIGHT ♪

♪ EVERYBODY'S IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT ♪

♪ LOSE YOUR MIND ♪

♪ LET YOUR BODY TAKE CONTROL ♪

♪ YOU'VE GOT TO FEEL IT IN YOUR SOUL ♪

♪ I'VE GOT THAT FEELIN', BABY ♪

♪ YOU KNOW IT DRIVES ME CRAZY ♪

♪ AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS HIT THE FLOOR ♪

♪ I WANNA SHOUT IT, Y'ALL ♪

♪ SO MAKE IT LOUDER, Y'ALL ♪

♪ AND TURN IT UP SOME MORE ♪

♪ BRINGIN' DA NOISE ♪

♪ BRING DOWN THE HOUSE ♪

♪ WE CAME HERE TO TURN THE PARTY OUT ♪

♪ SAY COME ON, COME ON ♪

♪ LET'S RAISE THE ROOF AND GIVE 'EM PROOF ♪

♪ THAT WE CAN GET LOOSE, Y'ALL ♪

ISN'T THAT YOUR BROTHER?

IT CAN'T BE.

♪ SAY COME ON, COME ON ♪

♪ LET'S RAISE THE ROOF AND GIVE 'EM PROOF ♪

♪ THAT WE CAN GET LOOSE, Y'ALL ♪

SOMETHING IS GOING ON WITH HIM.

HE'S ACTUALLY ACTING COOL.

♪ BRINGIN' DA NOISE ♪

♪ JUST SHAKE IT, GIRL ♪

♪ AND ENJOY THE RIDE ♪

♪ DO WHAT YOU FEEL INSIDE ♪

♪ 'CAUSE IT'S YOUR WORLD ♪

♪ ALL YOU WANT AND MORE ♪

YOU WANNA COME UP?

♪ SO, BABY, GO AND GET YOURS ♪

♪ I'VE GOT THAT FEELING, BABY ♪

♪ YOU KNOW IT DRIVES ME CRAZY ♪

I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T DANCE.

I MOVE TO THE GROOVE.

HOW 'BOUT THE SOCIAL?

I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU'D LIKE TO GO WITH ME, WOULD YOU?

WILL THERE BE PIZZA THERE?

I'LL BRING SOME WITH ME.

OK.

REALLY?

REALLY. 'CAUSE I LOVE MY PIZZA.

♪ COME ON, COME ON, LET'S RAISE THE ROOF ♪

♪ AND GIVE 'EM PROOF... ♪

I THINK I'M HAVING AN OUT-OF-BODY EXPERIENCE.

♪ WE CAME HERE TO TURN THE PARTY OUT ♪

♪ SAY COME ON, COME ON, LET'S RAISE THE ROOF-- ♪

YOU GUYS GOTTA TRY THIS.

PARK IT HERE, DESOTA.

WELL, LOOK WHAT WE GOT HERE.

BROWNING BUTT IN THE FLESH.

ISN'T THAT NICE?

IS IT? I'M NOT REALLY SURE.

SOMEONE SAID I WAS IN BIG TROUBLE.

NOT AS BIG AS THE TROUBLE YOU'RE GONNA BE IN

WHEN I GET YOU ALONE ONE OF THESE DAYS.

YOU'RE STILL MAD ABOUT ME GETTING YOU SUSPENDED.

BUT IT WASN'T RIGHT OF YOU TO STEAL MY LUNCH MONEY.

WHAT DID YOU SAY?

ALTHOUGH I SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN AFRAID TO TALK TO YOU MYSELF.

RATHER THAN TELLING A TEACHER.

I MEAN, THERE'S NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF, RIGHT?

YEAH. RIGHT.

I'M SORRY.

BUT I SHOULD'VE BEEN BRAVER.

DUDE, THERE'S SOMETHING SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH YOU TODAY.

SO, WHAT DID YOU DO TO GET HERE?

I STARTED A RIOT IN THE LUNCH ROOM.

THAT WAS YOU?

I BET YOUR OLD MAN'S GONNA GO MEDIEVAL ON YOU, HUH?

OLD MAN?

I MEAN, LIKE, YOUR DAD.

MY DAD?

YOUR FATHER, STUPID.

I MEAN, YOU DO HAVE A FATHER, RIGHT?

I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A FATHER.

MY DAD LEFT ME AND MY MOM WHEN I WAS TWO.

I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A FATHER, EITHER.

YOU KNOW WHAT, BROWNING?

YOU'RE ALL RIGHT, MAN.

[ Bell Rings ]

GUESS WHO'S BEEN PRACTICING.

SO, HOW'D IT GO? TELL ME EVERYTHING.

OH, IT WAS GREAT. I MADE LOTS OF FRIENDS.

I LOVE SCHOOL. I WANT TO GO AGAIN TOMORROW.

MY FRIEND, YOU HAVE MY PERMISSION

TO GO EVERY DAY UNTIL THE END OF THE YEAR.

WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?

OUR HOMEWORK.

AM I A GENIUS OR WHAT?

[ Phone Rings ]

HELLO.

HI, WILL. IT'S HEATHER.

HEATHER?

WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING ON WEARING?

WEARING TO WHAT?

WEARING TO THE SOCIAL, SILLY.

THE SOCIAL?

YOU KNOW, NEXT WEEKEND.

HEATHER, I'VE GOTTA GO TAKE CARE OF SOMETHING.

I'LL CALL YOU BACK.

YOU INVITED HER TO THE SOCIAL?!

NO, SHE INVITED ME.

UUGH! IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO SAY YES!

SHE'S BRINGING PIZZA.

SIX YEARS SPENT AVOIDING HEATHER JOHNSON

DESTROYED IN ONE DAY.

[ Doorbell Rings ]

STAY HERE. DON'T TALK TO ANYONE.

IF THE PHONE RINGS, DON'T ANSWER IT.

STAY!

[ Both Scream ]

GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU, BROWNING.

YOU LEFT THIS AT THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE.

I DID?

YEAH. THOUGHT I'D DROP IT OFF FOR YOU.

YOU DID?

IT WAS COOL TALKING TO YOU TODAY, MAN.

IT WAS?

I'LL CATCH YOU TOMORROW, BROWNING.

YOU WILL?

WHAT WAS WITH THAT WEIRDNESS TODAY AT LUNCH, DOUGH BRAIN?

YOU HAVE TO TEACH ME THAT DANCE, OK?

EVERYBODY'S BEEN ASKING ME WHERE YOU LEARNED IT.

I'M KIND OF LIKE A CELEBRITY SISTER.

MIKE CARMICHAEL EVEN ASKED ME OUT.

WHAT IS GOING ON AROUND HERE?

EXCUSE ME.

ARE YOU WILLIAM BROWNING?

WHO WANTS TO KNOW?

UH, WE'RE FROM THE OCEAN PUPS COMPANY.

AND, UH, WE'RE...

WE'RE HERE...

HERE. RESPONDING TO YOUR CALL.

RESPONDING TO YOUR CALL OF A FEW DAYS AGO.

THAT'S RIGHT.

OH, THAT'S NICE OF YOU.

IT WAS NOTHING, REALLY.

UH, WELL, WE UNDERSTAND THAT, UH,

THAT YOUR KIT-- YOU EXPERIENCED

SOME STRANGE REACTION.

WEIRD THINGS GOING ON?

NO, IT WASN'T THAT STRANGE.

LOOK, WE'RE HERE TO HELP YOU.

YEAH.

SO JUST TELL US EVERYTHING,

AND HELP US HELP YOU.

NO, REALLY. EVERYTHING'S FINE.

THE KIT WAS LAME. I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP,

BUT I'D TAKE A REFUND.

UH...

WELL, WE'LL GET BACK TO YOU ON THAT.

YEAH, WE'LL HAVE TO DO THAT.

I'M KINDA BUSY HELPING MY DAD IN THE BACKYARD.

DAD, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE!

OH, NO, THAT'S FINE.

WE'RE SORRY TO HAVE BOTHERED YOU, AND BYE.

OK.

DO YOU THINK THE KID'S TELLING THE TRUTH?

THINK? I DON'T NEED TO THINK.

THIS DEVICE ANALYZES VOICE PATTERNS

AND CREATES A DETAILED PROFILE OF WHATEVER SUBJECT I'M STUDYING.

AND ACCORDING TO THIS,

WILL BROWNING IS...

A NERVOUS, FOUR-FOOT-TALL, RABID CHIMPANZEE.

LET'S JUST GET OUTTA HERE, OK?

WHATEVER IT IS HE'S CLONED IN THERE,

AFTER THREE WEEKS, IT'LL BE HISTORY.

THE BUILT-IN LIFESPAN WILL END.

HASTA LA VISTA. NO MORE HYPERCLONE.

OUR PROBLEMS WILL BE SOLVED.

NO, NO, NO.

I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE

UNTIL I FIND OUT EXACTLY WHAT HE'S CLONED.

NOW WE'RE ALREADY COMMITTED A TACTICAL BREECH

BY ANNOUNCING OUR PRESENCE.

IF WE WANT TO CONTINUE WITH THIS STAKEOUT,

WE NEED TO BLEND IN A LITTLE MORE.

WE NEED... CAMOUFLAGE.

Will: CHECK OUT WHAT'S IN THAT VAN!

LOOKS LIKE THE CIA JUST ARRIVED.

WHAT IS ALL THAT?

ELECTRONIC STUFF, LIKE FOR SPYING OR SOMETHING.

I'VE GOT A FEELING THOSE GUYS

ARE INTO A LOT MORE THAN OCEAN PUPS.

WHATTA YA MEAN?

I KIND OF USED AN OCEAN PUPS KIT,

BUT INSTEAD OF GETTING OCEAN PUPS, I GOT YOU.

YOU THINK THEY'RE HERE FOR ME?

HEY, RELAX.

WE'VE JUST GOT TO KEEP AN EYE ON 'EM, THAT'S ALL.

CAN I STILL LEAVE THE HOUSE?

HEY, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT MY GRADES HERE.

YOU STILL LIKE SCHOOL, DON'T YOU?

TOTALLY.

GOOD. AFTER YOU GET MY BUTT OUT OF SUMMER BOOT CAMP,

YOU CAN GO BACK UNDER COVER.

BUT NOW, THE MAIN THING IS,

YOU AND I CAN NEVER, EVER, EVER BE SEEN TOGETHER BY ANYONE.

ESPECIALLY THOSE GUYS.

DEAL?

DEAL.

WILL, AWESOME JOB ON THIS EXAM.

"A+"! WE'RE SO PROUD OF YOU, HONEY.

[ Yawns ]

WHOA! SORRY.

HEY!

OK.

I'VE READ THIS ONE, ALREADY.

LIKE SIX TIMES.

YOU'RE LATE. WHERE WERE YOU?

OH, CHUCKIE AND I WENT OUT FOR PIZZA WITH SCOTTIE DESOTA.

I BROUGHT YOU BACK A SLICE.

A SLICE OF PIZZA?

I'VE BEEN LIVING LIKE A PRISONER HERE,

AND YOU BRING ME BACK A SLICE OF PIZZA?

I'M JUST DOING WHAT YOU ASKED ME TO, WILL.

YOU DID THINK THIS UP.

YEAH, AND IF YOUR GRADES WEREN'T SO GOOD

I'D UN-THINK THIS UP RIGHT NOW.

I'M SORRY YOU'RE SO UPSET.

I WISH I HAD TIME TO TALK ABOUT IT.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

OH, CHUCKIE AND I ARE MEETING HEATHER

AND SOME OF THE KIDS DOWN AT THE ARCADE.

FORGET IT. YOU'RE STAYING HERE. I'M GOING.

I THINK I DESERVE TO HAVE A LITTLE FUN TOO.

WHY?

WHY? WHY?

THAT'S WHAT YOU DO ALL DAY IS HAVE FUN.

I'M THE ONE THAT DOES ALL THE WORK AROUND HERE.

FINE. GO.

WHATEVER.

LOOK, WILL, I THOUGHT STAYING HOME ALL DAY,

EATING JUNK FOOD, WATCHING TELEVISION,

AND NOT GOING TO SCHOOL WAS YOUR DREAM.

IT WAS MY DREAM.

MY DREAM STINKS.

$200 FOR THE ICE CREAM TRUCK RENTAL.

FIFTY BUCKS FOR A PORTABLE FREEZER.

WE WEREN'T DOING SO BAD.

WE WOULD HAVE BROKEN EVEN IN A COUPLE OF MONTHS.

I DIDN'T COME HERE TO START A SMALL BUSINESS.

NOT TO MENTION THE FACT WE DIDN'T GET ANY SPYING DONE.

CONRAD, WHEN HYPERCLONING HITS IT BIG,

WE'RE GONNA LOOK BACK AT ALL THIS AND LAUGH.

MY ISLAND WE BUY WITH ALL THAT MONEY.

I WANT A LITTLE RANCH HOUSE,

A PICKET FENCE, FLUFFY WHITE PILLOWS.

IT'S NOT POSSIBLE.

WHICH PART?

LOOK, LOOK, LOOK, LOOK.

DOWN ON THE DRIVEWAY.

WHAT'S UP, MAN?

Victor: THE BEDROOM WINDOW.

ONE THERE, ONE THERE. TWO OF THEM!

TWO WILL BROWNINGS!

Both: HE'S HYPERCLONED HIMSELF!

A HUMAN HYPERCLONE!

CONRAD, DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?

IF WE GRAB HOLD OF THAT SPECIMEN AND RUN SOME TESTS,

WE'LL BE ABLE TO HYPERCLONE HUMANS.

THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF OUR LIVES!

NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS FIGURE OUT WHICH WILL IS WILL

AND WHICH WILL IS THE CLONE.

WHY DON'T WE JUST GRAB THEM BOTH?

NO. THAT'S KIDNAPPING.

WHEREAS, THE LAST TIME I CHECKED,

THERE WERE NO LAWS AGAINST CLONENAPPING.

SO WE WAIT UNTIL THE CLONE IS ALONE.

EXACTLY.

WE'VE STILL GOT THREE DAYS.

YOU SURE YOU WANT ME TO DO THIS?

HEY, IF YOU CAN HANG OUT WITH MY FRIENDS AT THE ARCADE,

YOU CAN HANG OUT WITH GRANDPA MORDECHAI.

BESIDES, IT'S JUST FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS.

JUST ACT MORE OR LESS NORMAL AND YOU'LL BE FINE.

GRANDPA MORDECHAI IS YOUR FAMILY.

TODAY HE'S ALL YOURS.

YOU'LL LOVE HIM. HE'S A LOAD OF LAUGHS.

IS THAT WHAT OLD LOOKS LIKE?

THAT'S WHAT VERY OLD LOOKS LIKE.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S JUST GO WATCH TELEVISION WITH MORDECHAI.

HI, DAD. LOOK WHO CAME TO SEE YOU.

HI, MORDECHAI.

HI, GRANDPA.

GO ON, DUFUS. SAY HI.

DOES IT HURT?

BEING OLD?

NOT TODAY.

WILL?

WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?

TELL ME YOU DIDN'T MESS ANYTHING UP.

YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT GRANDPA MORDECHAI.

HE'S A LOT OF FUN.

WE HAD A LONG TALK.

GRANDPA MORDECHAI DOESN'T TALK TO ANYONE.

HE TALKED TO ME.

[ Knocking ] WILL, CAN WE COME IN?

OH, YOU CHANGED YOUR CLOTHES.

YES. YES, I DID.

HONEY, YOUR DAD AND I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW

THAT THAT WAS THE SWEETEST THING YOU HAVE EVER DONE.

IT MEANT SO MUCH TO ME,

YOU BEING NICE TO GRANDPA.

YOU KNOW HOW MUCH FAMILY MEANS TO ME.

ANYWAY, I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW

YOU ARE A VERY SPECIAL PERSON.

DON'T YOU EVER FORGET THAT.

AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT YOUR MOTHER AND I

ARE VERY IMPRESSED WITH YOU LATELY.

I MEAN, THE CHANGES YOU'VE MADE AT SCHOOL,

AND YOUR GRADES ARE UP,

YOUR ATTITUDE'S IMPROVED.

IT'S LIKE YOU'RE A DIFFERENT KID.

I GUESS WE GOT THROUGH TO YOU.

AND SINCE THE CHANGES HAPPENED WITH YOU SO FAST,

SUMMER BOOT CAMP IS NOT AN ISSUE ANYMORE.

THE SUMMER IS YOURS.

DO ANYTHING YOU WANT.

GOOF OFF, HANG OUT AROUND WITH CHUCKIE,

ANYTHING. YOU DESERVE IT.

WHAT IF... THE NEW ME WAS ONLY TEMPORARY?

WHAT IF I WENT BACK TO HOW I USED TO BE?

YOU'D STILL LOVE ME...

RIGHT?

HONEY, LOVING YOU WAS NEVER THE QUESTION.

C'MON, YOU KNEW THAT, DIDN'T YOU?

HUH?

WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?

UM, TO SCHOOL?

NOT TODAY. I'M GOING.

YOU'RE STAYING HERE.

DO NOT LEAVE THIS ROOM.

UH, WILL...

MAYBE I SHOULD FILL YOU IN ON WHAT'S GOING ON IN SCHOOL.

THINGS ARE A LITTLE DIFFERENT NOW.

YOU KNOW, WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND EVERYTHING.

I THINK I CAN FIGURE OUT HOW TO TALK TO MY FRIENDS IN MY SCHOOL, OK?

OK.

THE NERVE OF THAT GUY.

"MAYBE I SHOULD FILL YOU IN ON WHAT'S GOING ON."

PLEASE. LOOKS LIKE HIS CLONE HEAD IS GETTING A LITTLE SWELLED.

HEY, THERE'S WILL!

WHAT'S GOING ON, WILL?

HI, WILL.

HI.

MY FRIENDS, MY LIFE.

HI, WILL. THANKS SO MUCH FOR HELPING ME REARRANGE MY ROOM.

IT WAS SO NICE OF YOU TO STAY LATE.

THIS IS MY SCHOOL, NOT HIS.

WILL!

CHUCKIE, DID I REALLY STAY AFTER SCHOOL

AND HELP MISS PINKERSON MOVE HER FURNITURE?

DON'T YOU REMEMBER?

SURE, I DO.

I JUST DON'T REMEMBER WHY.

WHY?

'CAUSE IT'S YOU, MAN.

YOU GIVE. YOU'RE ALWAYS UP FOR NEW THINGS.

IN THESE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS YOU'VE BECOME PRETTY, AH...

I GUESS THE WORD I'M LOOKIN' FOR IS POPULAR.

YEAH. RIGHT.

WILL, MY MAN. MY MOM SCORED SOME TICKETS TO SUNDAY'S BALL GAME.

RIGHT BEHIND HOME PLATE.

WANNA COME?

SURE.

HEY!

LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE SOME CLEANING UP TO DO.

BUT IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

GRIP IT, PUNK. AND PICK IT UP.

SORRY. I'M SO SORRY.

THANKS, BUDDY.

SO, THINK ABOUT THE GAME. WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT AT LUNCH.

SAVE YOUR SEAT?

THANKS.

COOL. SEE YOU LATER. YOU TOO, DUDE.

WILL? YOU OK?

WHAT TIME DO YOU WANT TO MEET TONIGHT?

TONIGHT?

THE JUNIOR SOCIAL,

REMEMBER, SILLY?

NO, HEATHER, I FORGOT. DUH.

HOW'S 7:00?

I WANNA BE THERE EARLY-- SO WE CAN TALK AND STUFF.

IT'S SETTLED THEN.

7:00 IN THE GYM.

SEE YA LATER, WILLIAM.

I'LL SEE YA... WILLIAM.

OH, MAN.

WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LIFE?

TWOIE?

TELL ME YOU'RE IN HERE.

I REALIZED YOU WERE MAKING VERY POOR USE

OF YOUR AVAILABLE SHELF AND CLOSET SPACE,

SO I INCREASED THE TOTAL STORAGE CAPACITY OF YOUR ROOM

BY 12.4 CUBIC FEET.

WANT TO SEE THE CHART?

NO.

THANKS.

YOU'RE MAD.

WOW. YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT.

YOU SURE YOU HAVE MY GENES?

EVERY LAST ONE OF 'EM.

THEN HOW COME YOU GET "A"s?

HOW COME GRANDPA MORDECHAI TALKED TO YOU?

HOW COULD ALL OF THIS HAVE HAPPENED FOR YOU

BUT NEVER FOR ME?

YOU'RE ME, AREN'T YOU?

OF COURSE I'M YOU. I'M NO BETTER OR WORSE.

YEAH. WELL, EVERYONE THINKS YOU'RE BETTER.

NO. EVERYONE THINKS YOU'RE BETTER.

NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT ME.

WHAT DO YOU DO THAT'S DIFFERENT?

I TRY HARD. AND I'M NOT AFRAID.

I'M NOT AFRAID OF ANYTHING.

I THINK YOU PRETEND NOT TO CARE ABOUT GRADES AND ALL.

BUT REALLY, I THINK YOU DON'T TRY BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID

YOU MIGHT NOT DO SO WELL.

OH, COME ON!

AND IT'S NOT JUST GRADES.

IF I WANT TO DO SOMETHING LIKE DANCE, I DANCE.

I DON'T CARE IF PEOPLE LAUGH AT ME. YOU DO.

WHY DON'T YOU CARE?

WHY SHOULD I?

I'M NOT HURTING ANYONE.

I'M JUST BEING ME.

IF PEOPLE LIKE ME FOR THAT-- GREAT.

AND IF THEY DON'T-- WELL THEN,

THERE'S A LOT OF OTHER PEOPLE OUT THERE

WHO I CAN BE FRIENDS WITH.

ALL I KNOW IS THAT YOU'VE MESSED UP MY LIFE.

YOU DIDN'T LIKE SCHOOL TODAY?

I DID. THAT'S THE PROBLEM.

AND NOW, EVERYONE'S EXPECTING YOU TONIGHT AT THE JUNIOR SOCIAL.

AND THEY'RE GONNA GET ME.

I SHOULD HAVE LET YOU GET ME A FEW GOOD GRADES,

THEN TAKEN YOU TO THE MALL AND DUMPED YOU.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

I AM?

I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS MORE AND MORE,

AND I DON'T BELONG HERE.

THIS IS YOUR FAMILY,

NOT MINE.

TWOIE, I--I--

I WAS THINKIN', IF YOU DON'T MIND,

MAYBE I'LL GO TO NEW YORK CITY.

SEE IF IT REALLY IS BLACK AND WHITE.

BUT--

I'VE DECIDED, WILL.

I'M LEAVING TONIGHT.

LOOK, THERE'S THAT JUNIOR SOCIAL THING.

I WAS GONNA GO, BUT MAYBE YOU SHOULD GO INSTEAD.

SEE EVERYONE AND HANG OUT WITH THEM FOR ONE LAST TIME.

THIS IS A BIG NIGHT FOR ALL OF US.

YOU, AT YOUR DANCE.

US, TAKING GRANDPA MORDECHAI TO A MOVIE.

OK. OK. HOW ABOUT A BIG SMILE FOR POSTERITY, HUH?

LOOK AT YOU.

I REMEMBER MY FIRST DANCE.

I WAS SO NERVOUS.

SOMETHING ABOUT A SCHOOL DANCE.

[ Drinking Straw Gurgling ]

THERE'S THAT STATIC AGAIN.

THERE WE GO.

LOOK. THERE'S ONE OF 'EM.

LET'S GO!

GOOD-BYE, TWOIE.

HEY, WILL!

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

WHY DID YOU STOP ME?

HOW'S IT GOIN'?

WE DON'T WANT ANY WITNESSES.

BESIDES, DID YOU SEE HOW HE WAS DRESSED?

HE'S GOING TO THAT SCHOOL DANCE.

THAT'S THE REAL WILL BROWNING.

WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR SPECULATION, VICTOR.

EITHER THE CLONE DRINKS THIS TONIGHT,

OR HE TURNS INTO OCEAN PUP EGGS IN THE MORNING.

Ocean Pup eggs.

WELL, YOU'RE THE ONE THAT PUT THE FOUR-WEEK LIFESPAN ON IT.

SECURITY PRECAUTION.

YEAH. WELL, AT LEAST WE KNOW THAT THE HYPERCLONE

IS SOMEWHERE IN THE BROWNING HOUSE. RIGHT?

UMM. GIMME THAT.

GIMME!

I WANT IT.

THE CLONE! THE CLONE!

OK. HE'S GONE.

WE KNOW WHERE THE REAL WILL BROWNING IS.

WE'LL GRAB HIM. PUMP HIM FOR INFO.

WHERE THERE'S A WILL, THERE'S A WAY.

SO, HOW YA FEELIN', MAN?

GREAT. WHAT'S THAT?

AHH, THAT WOULD BE THE SCHOOL MASCOT.

HE MUST BE VERY IMPORTANT.

YEAH. RIGHT.

WOW. THIS IS NICE.

I'VE NEVER SEEM ANYTHING SO...WHITE...AND SO SPARKILY.

♪♪

HI, WILL.

I BROUGHT THE PIZZA.

WOW. THANKS.

THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT.

HOW COME NO ONE'S DANCING?

COME ON, MAN. YOU KNOW NO ONE WANTS TO BE

THE FIRST GEEK ON THE DANCE FLOOR.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

COME ON. BROWNING NEEDS BACKUP.

HEEEY! HEY, DUDE. WILL YOU HOLD THIS FOR A SECOND?

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

GREAT.

I CAN'T EVEN BE MAD AT HIM.

YEAH.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

UH, I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

MAYBE I CAN SHOW YOU GUYS A NEW DANCE STEP.

WILL, WHY'D YOU CHANGE?

AND HOW'D YOU DO IT SO FAST?

I DIDN'T CHANGE.

IT WAS NEVER ME.

IT WAS MY CLONE.

YOU'RE SOMETHIN' ELSE.

I MEAN, I ASKED YOU WHY YOU CHANGED YOUR CLOTHES,

AND YOU'VE GOTTA COME UP WITH "THAT WAS MY CLONE."

MAN, YOU CRACK ME UP.

LISTEN TO ME!

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO WANT TO BELIEVE THIS, BUT IT'S TRUE.

SO I NEED YOUR HELP. OK?

YOU'RE DOIN' IT AGAIN, MAN.

YOU'RE BEGINNING TO FREAK ME OUT.

I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED.

UH-OH.

WHAT?

LET'S MOVE. WE'LL WALK AND TALK.

WHAT THE...

GOLD LEADER TO BLUE ONE.

I HAVE A VISUAL.

WAIT. I THOUGHT I WAS GOLD LEADER.

OVER BY THE DJ.

IT'S THE HYPERCLONE.

WE GOT HIM.

TIME TO GO.

HI, WILL.

I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE THIRSTY AFTER ALL THAT DANCING.

NICE CLOTHES. MUCH MORE YOU.

SO, YOU PROMISED US A NEW DANCE STEP.

I DID?

[ Kids Chanting ] WILL! WILL! WILL!

GO FIND HIM, OK?

BRING HIM BACK TO MY GARAGE. I'LL BE RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

ALL RIGHT.

AND, CHUCKIE, BE CAREFUL, MAN.

YOU GOT IT.

[ Chanting Continues ]

DO YOU GUYS WANT A NEW DANCE STEP?

YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!

WELL, GET REAL CLOSE SO YOU CAN SEE ME.

WHAT'S HE DOING?

HUH?

YO-YO.

PLUNGE.

TONGUE TWISTER.

WALK THE DOG.

YOU'RE THE BEST.

ALTHOUGH, I'VE KNOWN THAT FOR YEARS.

YOU DON'T THINK I'M BETTER NOW THAN I WAS BEFORE?

NO. I KNEW YOU'D COME AROUND.

I GOTTA RUN. BUT I'LL CALL YOU.

PROMISE?

YEAH.

OH!

HELLO?

BLUE ONE. I'VE LOST VISUAL.

YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T SEE HIM?

NO. I CAN'T SEE HIM.

I'M GOIN' IN.

YO!

ROTATE.

IN 5, 6, 7, AND...

TURN.

GOT 'EM.

WHERE?

OVER THERE. TWELVE O'CLOCK HIGH.

THIS WAY.

HEY, WILL.

YOU'RE NOT IN THE BATHROOM.

I MEAN, HE'S NOT IN THERE.

I MEAN, WHAT DO I MEAN?

WAIT A SECOND.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

SOMETIMES WE CAN COMMUNICATE PSYCHICALLY.

YOU KNOW. WE CAN HEAR EACH OTHER'S THOUGHTS.

IF ONE OF US IS REALLY STRESSED OR SOMETHING.

SHOOT! NOTHING.

THAT'S IT. YOU'RE MAKING ALL THIS UP. I KNOW IT.

CHUCKIE, YOU'VE GOTTA TRUST ME!

LOOK IN THE GYM. THEN GO TO MY HOUSE.

YOU TAKE THE SHORTCUT. I'LL TAKE THE LONG WAY.

THAT WAY IF HE'S OUT THERE...

...ONE OF US WILL FIND HIM.

THIS IS ONE HECK OF A JUNIOR SOCIAL.

HEY!

GOTCHA!

HELLO, MY LITTLE HYPERCLONE.

LEMME-- LEMME GO!

BUS NOW BOARDING FOR NEW YORK CITY.

NOW BOARDING FOR NEW YORK CITY.

HELP! HELP! HELP!

HOLD 'EM, MAN.

I'VE GOT 'EM.

LEMME GO!

LET'S GO, KID.

HEY. WHILE I'M YOUNG.

HYPER LITTLE HYPERCLONE, AREN'T YOU?

LET'S GET SOME DNA.

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS, CRAZY? LET ME GO!

NO, MY LITTLE ATM CARD, WE'RE NOT CRAZY.

BUT THANKS TO YOU, WE'RE GONNA BE VERY RICH.

NO! YOU'LL BE IN JAIL! THIS IS KIDNAPPING!

UH-AH.

CLONENAPPING.

YOU THINK I'M TWOIE, DON'T YOU?

YEAH, WELL, YOU GOT THE WRONG ONE!

I'M THE REAL WILL.

YEAH! ALL RIGHT NOW.

IF YOU'LL LET ME GO RIGHT NOW, I WON'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT YOU, OK?

WOULD YOU EXCUSE US FOR A MOMENT, PLEASE?

YEAH.

WHAT IF HE'S TELLING THE TRUTH?

IF WE GIVE A NORMAL KID THE SERUM, NO TELLING WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN.

I THINK WE HAVE TO GET THE OTHER ONE.

RUN SOME TESTS.

THAT'S THE ONLY WAY WE CAN BE SURE.

OH, YEAH.

CHECK THE ROPES. GOTTA KEEP THIS ONE HERE.

OK.

DON'T GO AWAY.

HELP! SOMEBODY, HELP ME!

BIG TROUBLE. I'M IN BIG TROUBLE.

IF I EVER GET OUTTA HERE, I--

TWOIE WAS RIGHT.

WHAT WAS I WAITING FOR?

NOW I'LL NEVER GET A CHANCE TO DANCE, OR SEE CHUCKIE OR HEATHER, EVEN.

OR ALLANA, OR MOM AND DAD.

I LOVE MY MOM AND DAD.

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. I MISS MY FAMILY.

TELL ME ABOUT IT.

TWOIE!

IN THE FLESH.

I WAS AT THE BUS STATION, AND I KNEW YOU WERE SCARED.

AND THEN THE NAME RED JACK MOTORS FLASHED IN MY HEAD.

YOU CAME BACK FOR ME.

WHY ARE YOU SO SURPRISED?

YOU SHOULD BE MAD AT ME.

WILL, IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU,

I WOULDN'T HAVE EVER TASTED PIZZA.

I OWE YOU ONE.

TWOIE, I GOTTA TELL YOU SOMETHING.

IF YOU DON'T DRINK SOME SPECIAL LIQUID

THOSE CREEPS IN THE VAN HAVE,

YOU MIGHT TURN BACK INTO OCEAN PUP EGGS.

THAT'S WHY I'VE BEEN FEELING SO WEIRD.

WE'VE GOTTA GET IT BACK FROM THEM.

WELL, THAT WAS STUPID, CONRAD.

COME ON!

"WE DON'T NEED GAS," YOU SAID.

"IT RUNS FOR THREE MILES ON EMPTY," YOU SAID.

HE'S GONE.

ALL RIGHT. HE'S GOTTA BE IN HERE.

NO WAY OUT.

RIGHT.

[ Whistles ]

WE BETTER SPLIT UP.

Come on!

WELL, WELL, WELL.

LOOKS LIKE WE FINALLY GOT OUR HYPERCLONE.

I'M WILL.

WE SWITCHED CLOTHES.

I DON'T THINK SO.

YOU DON'T NEED TO BE AFRAID.

WE'VE GOT YOUR BEST INTEREST AT HEART.

YOU NEED US.

SEE, WITHOUT THIS--

YOU'LL BE NOTHIN' BUT... CHEAP CAVIAR.

IT'S ALREADY STARTED. YOU CAN SEE IT IN YOUR FACE.

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH THAT?

OH. OH!

OOH! YOU GOT ME.

OW!

OH, NO!

STOP THE--

VICTOR?

VICTOR?

AAAHHHH!

GET ME A PARACHUTE, BOYS.

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO DO BETTER THAN THAT.

AAHHHH!

OW!

THOSE LITTLE CREEPS ASSAULTED ME!

COME ON!

YOU GO. GO!

GET 'EM! GET 'EM!

GOTCHA!

I GOTCHA, TWOIE. COME ON! I GOTCHA, BUDDY!

WHOA...OW!

TWO-- TWOIE!

TWOIE! TWOIE!

TWOIE! LET HIM GO! I'LL CALL THE POLICE!

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? HUH?

TELL THE POLICE THAT THE BAD MEN STOLE YOUR HYPERCLONE?

WHO'S GONNA BELIEVE YA?

THE WINDOW. THE BATHROOM WINDOW.

IT'S TIME TO TAKE YOUR MEDICINE.

COME NOW!

THIS SOLUTION WILL KEEP YOU RUNNING FOREVER.

YOU DO WANT TO LIVE, DON'T YOU?

WHY? SO YOU CAN EXPERIMENT ON ME?

WHY SHOULDN'T WE EXPERIMENT ON YOU? WE CREATED YOU!

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY YEARS WE SLAVED TO MAKE YOU POSSIBLE?

HOLD HIM STILL.

THIS WON'T HURT A BIT.

BUT THIS WILL.

OH.

MOMMY!

OH, THAT SMARTS.

AAAHH!

IS THERE A PROBLEM HERE?

THAT'S PRIVATE PROPERTY.

OW! OH!

TWOIE?

COME ON, TWOIE. DRINK THIS NOW!

COME ON.

SORRY, WILL.

NO! COME ON!

DRINK IT!

TWOIE?

[ Burp ]

WOW!

WOW! WOW! A-A-YOU!

AND YOU!

NEITHER OF YOU WERE LYING!

HOW DID YOU GUYS KNOW TO COME HERE?

I STOPPED BY THE SCHOOL ON MY WAY HERE,

AND I TOLD THEM TO GET HELP.

OK. THIS DOESN'T CONCERN YOU CHILDREN.

CHILDREN? GRIP IT, EINSTEIN.

AAHHH!

COME ON! LET'S GO!

OH, NO.

OFFICERS, THERE'S ANOTHER ONE OVER THERE.

OH, THAT'S MY--

WATCH IT--

COME ON, HONEY.

WILL! HONEY, ARE YOU OK?

WILL, WHAT HAPPENED? ARE YOU--

TWO OF THEM?

MY WORST NIGHTMARE.

WE'RE NOT CRIMINALS. WE'RE SCIENTISTS!

THAT'S OUR CLONE IN THERE!

REMEMBER THAT SCIENCE PROJECT I WAS WORKING ON?

YEAH, WELL, HE'S IT.

I'LL EXPLAIN EVERYTHING AT HOME, BUT PLEASE,

YOU GUYS GOTTA COVER FOR US.

PLEASE?

LOOK, I KNOW THIS IS GONNA SOUND LIKE A BIT OF A CRAZY QUESTION,

BUT, AH...

YOU TWO...

ARE...COUSINS. IDENTICAL COUSINS.

I'M WILL, AND THIS IS...

GILL.

GILL.

UHH, PUPMAN.

WE'RE COUSINS LIKE HE SAID.

I'M FROM BELGIUM.

COUSINS?

YEP. COUSINS.

IDENTICAL.

BELGIUM.

THEY'RE CLONES! IDENTICAL GENETIC SUBJECTS!

YEAH.

EVERY CELL'S THE SAME!

OFFICER, THAT MAN'S CRAZY.

WE MADE HIM!

OUTTA NOTHIN'!

YEAH, YEAH.

CLONES? WE'RE COUSINS.

NEVER COULD TELL THEM APART.

RIGHT, MOM? DAD?

WELL, OK, BUT WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO TAKE SOME STATEMENTS.

EH...TOMORROW.

THE, UM, COUSINS HAVE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH.

BUT...

UH...TOMORROW.

GILL,

LET'S GO HOME.

WILL, I THINK THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP.

SO, THIS WHOLE TIME HE'S BEEN LIVING IN MY ROOM,

DOING MY HOMEWORK AND STUFF.

BUT THE WEIRD THING IS,

HE CHANGED ME.

EVEN WHILE HE WAS BEING ME.

I-I-AM VERY CONFUSED. I AM SO CONFUSED.

SO...

CAN GILL STAY?

WHAT DO YOU WANT, GILL?

A FAMILY.

WELL, AS LONG AS YOU'RE LIVING UNDER THIS ROOF,

YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO MAINTAIN THOSE EXCELLENT GRADES.

THIS IS COOL.

WEIRD. BUT COOL.

AHH, BUT WE TELL NO ONE.

AHH, GILL IS A COUSIN WHO NOW LIVES WITH US.

RIGHT?

AN IDENTICAL COUSIN.

ANYONE WHO SAYS ANY DIFFERENT...

WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH ME.

WELL, OK. IT'S SETTLED THEN.

WELCOME TO THE FAMILY, GILL.

JUST DON'T GO TAKING TWICE AS MUCH TIME IN THE BATHROOM.

OK, THEN. I'M HUNGRY!

AND I DON'T WANT ANYTHING WITH TREE BARK.

PIZZA?

PIZZA!

PIZZA.

YES.

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