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1
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_
2
00:00:09,307 --> 00:00:10,907
MAN: Attack!
3
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(all grunting)
4
00:00:12,944 --> 00:00:15,078
(laughs, groans)
5
00:00:15,747 --> 00:00:16,880
Mind if I...
6
00:00:16,915 --> 00:00:19,015
- cut in?
- (cheering)
7
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- LASERON: All right, Zorn!
- (phone buzzes)
8
00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:23,987
Ah. Hey, guys, sorry.
9
00:00:24,022 --> 00:00:26,089
I got to split, it's my kid's birthday.
10
00:00:26,124 --> 00:00:28,491
Ah, the little bone
crusher's 17. Can you believe it?
11
00:00:28,527 --> 00:00:30,426
- Say hi to the wife for us.
- (snap)
12
00:00:30,462 --> 00:00:31,639
- I mean, technically,
- (slice)
13
00:00:31,663 --> 00:00:32,996
she's my ex-wife, but, you know,
14
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there's still some hot
embers in that fire, right?
15
00:00:35,167 --> 00:00:37,267
Sounds like you've got a
beautiful family, Zorn.
16
00:00:37,302 --> 00:00:39,135
I really hope to meet them some day.
17
00:00:39,171 --> 00:00:40,715
Don't worry, you
definitely will, Skunk Man.
18
00:00:40,739 --> 00:00:41,938
- (screams)
- Well,
19
00:00:41,973 --> 00:00:44,140
at least he died doing what he loved,
20
00:00:44,176 --> 00:00:45,508
wanting to meet my family.
21
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Here I come, son.
22
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("Everybody's Talkin'"
by Harry Nilsson plays)
23
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(grunting)
24
00:01:00,926 --> 00:01:01,925
(squish)
25
00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:03,793
Ah, come on.
26
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Unbelievable. Unbelievable.
27
00:01:06,064 --> 00:01:07,263
You want a baby wipe?
28
00:01:07,299 --> 00:01:08,198
"Baby wipe?"
29
00:01:08,233 --> 00:01:09,799
(chuckles)
30
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This guy just offered me a baby wipe.
31
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Can you believe that?
32
00:01:14,472 --> 00:01:16,306
I know you're fake-sleeping.
33
00:01:16,341 --> 00:01:18,208
So is that, is that
a no on the baby wipe?
34
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You're right, that's a no, I'm good.
35
00:01:20,378 --> 00:01:22,011
(chuckles) Yeah.
36
00:01:22,047 --> 00:01:23,880
(humming, clicking tongue)
37
00:01:23,915 --> 00:01:26,316
I'm, uh, on my way to Orange County
38
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to see my wife and kid.
39
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:29,475
- Oh?
- Yeah, I'm on my way to Orange County
40
00:01:29,499 --> 00:01:30,899
to see my wife and kid.
41
00:01:30,934 --> 00:01:32,100
They're gonna be so pumped.
42
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(chuckles) I mean,
43
00:01:33,349 --> 00:01:35,293
nothing, nothing more emotional
44
00:01:35,464 --> 00:01:37,639
than a soldier coming home, am I right?
45
00:01:37,674 --> 00:01:39,307
Oh, by the way, I'm Zorn.
46
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Defender of Zephyria,
47
00:01:40,410 --> 00:01:42,243
Conqueror of the Tribes of Aegon,
48
00:01:42,279 --> 00:01:44,112
Decapitator of the Dark Herdsmen of...
49
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Okay.
50
00:01:47,286 --> 00:01:51,030
♪ I'm going where the
sun keeps shining ♪
51
00:01:51,065 --> 00:01:54,600
♪ Through the pouring rain ♪
52
00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:56,508
♪ Going where the weather ♪
53
00:01:56,626 --> 00:02:00,506
♪ Suits my clothes ♪
54
00:02:00,542 --> 00:02:02,108
(alarm blaring)
55
00:02:02,143 --> 00:02:04,410
♪ Banking off of the northeast winds ♪
56
00:02:04,446 --> 00:02:06,179
ZORN: Uh, excuse me, sorry. Uh, sorry,
57
00:02:06,214 --> 00:02:08,247
eh, um, that's
mine. Uh, the-the sword...
58
00:02:08,283 --> 00:02:09,849
If someone can grab that ple... (sighs)
59
00:02:09,884 --> 00:02:11,150
No one could grab that, huh?
60
00:02:11,186 --> 00:02:12,785
No one? Great. Thanks, guys.
61
00:02:12,821 --> 00:02:15,888
- (horns honking)
- Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
62
00:02:15,924 --> 00:02:16,923
No, no, no, I'm fine.
63
00:02:16,958 --> 00:02:18,391
Please, continue.
64
00:02:18,426 --> 00:02:20,387
(coughing, clears throat)
65
00:02:22,374 --> 00:02:23,774
Ah, let's see what we got here.
66
00:02:23,798 --> 00:02:24,964
Oh, there he is, there he is.
67
00:02:24,999 --> 00:02:26,899
My little bone crusher.
That's what I call him.
68
00:02:26,935 --> 00:02:28,468
He's probably, like, I don't know,
69
00:02:28,503 --> 00:02:30,403
seven feet tall by now. (chuckles)
70
00:02:30,438 --> 00:02:31,838
Oh, uh, by the way,
71
00:02:31,873 --> 00:02:33,873
I'm Zorn, Defender of Zephyria,
72
00:02:33,908 --> 00:02:36,264
Conqueror of the Tribes of
Aegon, Decapitator of the...
73
00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:38,148
You've got to be (bleep) me.
74
00:02:38,235 --> 00:02:43,588
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
75
00:02:44,213 --> 00:02:46,313
Yeah, you could just
toss that right there.
76
00:02:46,348 --> 00:02:48,682
Hey, you don't have
change for $100, do you?
77
00:02:48,717 --> 00:02:50,195
No, I'm kidding, I'm not
gonna tip you. (chuckles)
78
00:02:50,219 --> 00:02:51,218
(doorbell rings)
79
00:02:51,253 --> 00:02:52,886
Hello, Zorn.
80
00:02:52,922 --> 00:02:54,054
(hearty laugh)
81
00:02:54,089 --> 00:02:56,484
There's my gal! Ex-gal, whatever.
82
00:02:56,643 --> 00:02:57,791
That trip was rough.
83
00:02:57,827 --> 00:02:59,538
You know, I called the
flight attendant a "stewardess."
84
00:02:59,562 --> 00:03:01,995
- Bad move, he was not pleased.
- Come in.
85
00:03:02,031 --> 00:03:05,571
Oh, not how I remember
that photo being framed,
86
00:03:05,732 --> 00:03:07,134
- but...
- Did you get bangs?
87
00:03:07,169 --> 00:03:08,936
Oh, yeah, yeah, I don't know,
88
00:03:08,971 --> 00:03:10,237
I'm still getting used to them.
89
00:03:10,272 --> 00:03:11,583
Well, you know, I
mean, they just started
90
00:03:11,607 --> 00:03:12,808
to cover a forehead wound.
91
00:03:12,952 --> 00:03:15,353
And then I was like, "Yeah,
what the hell, it's summer."
92
00:03:15,377 --> 00:03:17,377
Uh, hey, by the way, where's
my little decimator?
93
00:03:17,413 --> 00:03:19,046
Thought you said he'd be home by 3:00.
94
00:03:19,081 --> 00:03:21,415
I actually said his
bus gets here at 4:00.
95
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(chuckles)
96
00:03:22,852 --> 00:03:24,484
Look at us, fighting like the old days.
97
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:25,719
I miss this.
98
00:03:25,754 --> 00:03:27,254
Man,
99
00:03:27,289 --> 00:03:28,422
I cannot wait to see him.
100
00:03:28,457 --> 00:03:29,946
He's gonna be so pumped!
101
00:03:29,959 --> 00:03:32,197
Kid's just like his
old man, he's a warrior.
102
00:03:32,261 --> 00:03:34,141
BOY: Oh, wait, your
dad's coming to town, right?
103
00:03:34,273 --> 00:03:36,135
BOY 2: Yeah, I'm actually
pretty excited about it,
104
00:03:36,136 --> 00:03:37,598
you know? I mean, last time, sure
105
00:03:37,633 --> 00:03:39,032
he showed up half-naked,
106
00:03:39,068 --> 00:03:41,869
like, swinging a sword
around, yelling my name.
107
00:03:41,904 --> 00:03:45,005
- Just like, "Alangulon!"
- Yeah, no, I remember.
108
00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:46,351
That's why we got the metal detectors.
109
00:03:46,375 --> 00:03:47,352
I like the metal detectors.
110
00:03:47,376 --> 00:03:48,709
They're cool. It's like...
111
00:03:48,744 --> 00:03:50,388
It's like we're at the airport,
you know, you can pretend.
112
00:03:50,412 --> 00:03:52,179
I can't bring my Altoids in anymore.
113
00:03:52,214 --> 00:03:54,481
Okay, but that's the
price of travel, right?
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(laughter)
115
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Yeah.
116
00:03:57,686 --> 00:03:58,797
ZORN: The other day (chuckles)
117
00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:00,719
Vulchazor sends a bunch of
118
00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:03,201
ice bats to attack the
palace, and next thing you know...
119
00:04:03,225 --> 00:04:05,726
MAN: Edie, did you hide my Crocs again?
120
00:04:05,761 --> 00:04:06,793
What the hell?
121
00:04:06,829 --> 00:04:08,262
I can't find them any... Hey.
122
00:04:08,297 --> 00:04:12,065
- Hi.
- Wow. Uh, you must be Zorn.
123
00:04:12,101 --> 00:04:13,700
It's a pleasure to finally meet you.
124
00:04:13,736 --> 00:04:15,369
Zorn, this is Craig,
125
00:04:15,404 --> 00:04:16,837
my fiancé.
126
00:04:16,872 --> 00:04:18,105
Fiancé?
127
00:04:18,140 --> 00:04:19,439
Oh.
128
00:04:19,475 --> 00:04:21,875
Really... just really great to meet you.
129
00:04:21,911 --> 00:04:23,343
Really great.
130
00:04:23,379 --> 00:04:24,678
Zorn, it's obvious that you're
131
00:04:24,713 --> 00:04:26,313
applying way too much pressure
132
00:04:26,348 --> 00:04:27,425
to my hand right now, and...
133
00:04:27,449 --> 00:04:28,548
Uh-huh.
134
00:04:28,584 --> 00:04:29,728
- Actually, it hurts.
- It does?
135
00:04:29,752 --> 00:04:31,184
- It really does.
- Oh.
136
00:04:31,220 --> 00:04:33,186
In addition to that,
you're emasculating me
137
00:04:33,222 --> 00:04:34,988
- in front of my fiancée.
- Craig is
138
00:04:35,024 --> 00:04:36,334
- a professor of psychology.
- Oh.
139
00:04:36,358 --> 00:04:37,724
- Okay.
- EDIE: Oh,
140
00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:38,904
don't you have a lecture at 3:30?
141
00:04:38,928 --> 00:04:39,993
Oh, yes.
142
00:04:40,029 --> 00:04:41,728
Shouldn't you be logging on?
143
00:04:41,764 --> 00:04:42,841
What do you mean, "logging on"?
144
00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:44,765
Craig teaches at an online college.
145
00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:45,977
Yeah, but you said, "lecture".
146
00:04:46,001 --> 00:04:47,034
Okay, I-I can see
147
00:04:47,069 --> 00:04:48,201
where this is going.
148
00:04:48,237 --> 00:04:49,381
Let's just stop it right here.
149
00:04:49,405 --> 00:04:51,705
Yes. I teach online.
150
00:04:51,740 --> 00:04:53,907
Does that make me less of a man
151
00:04:53,943 --> 00:04:55,976
than any other professor out there?
152
00:04:56,011 --> 00:04:58,011
- (inhales)
- I'd say no.
153
00:04:58,047 --> 00:04:59,257
Am I an embarrassment to my family?
154
00:04:59,281 --> 00:05:00,914
Yes.
155
00:05:00,950 --> 00:05:03,383
An embarrassment to my
father, to a lesser extent,
156
00:05:03,419 --> 00:05:04,952
my mother.
157
00:05:04,987 --> 00:05:06,464
- To several bro...
- Well, you don't want to keep
158
00:05:06,488 --> 00:05:08,055
that Internet waiting, now do ya?
159
00:05:08,090 --> 00:05:10,324
- I'm gonna go in there.
- Okay.
160
00:05:10,359 --> 00:05:12,192
ZORN: Wow. So...
161
00:05:12,227 --> 00:05:13,427
He's cool.
162
00:05:13,462 --> 00:05:16,029
You know, I could see
someone being into that.
163
00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:17,164
Wanting that.
164
00:05:17,199 --> 00:05:19,132
- You're an idiot.
- No, I'm not.
165
00:05:19,168 --> 00:05:20,467
Craig is kind.
166
00:05:20,502 --> 00:05:21,709
- Oh, is he?
- And dependable.
167
00:05:21,710 --> 00:05:23,381
- I love my life here.
- You should love your life here.
168
00:05:23,405 --> 00:05:24,549
- (chuckling): I mean, we have...
- No, no...
169
00:05:24,573 --> 00:05:26,373
so much fun.
170
00:05:26,408 --> 00:05:27,374
We have an avocado
171
00:05:27,409 --> 00:05:28,909
- tree in the back,
- No!
172
00:05:28,944 --> 00:05:30,455
- And we make our own guacamole.
- No, come on.
173
00:05:30,479 --> 00:05:32,112
- You know...
- Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
174
00:05:32,147 --> 00:05:33,380
Come on... Edie.
175
00:05:33,415 --> 00:05:35,782
You remember that
time we had that fivesome
176
00:05:35,818 --> 00:05:37,217
with those mountain trolls?
177
00:05:37,252 --> 00:05:39,319
- (laughs) Do you remember that?
- Yeah. Okay.
178
00:05:39,355 --> 00:05:40,854
- Yes, that was the old me,
- Yeah?
179
00:05:40,889 --> 00:05:42,033
Sex with the mountain trolls.
180
00:05:42,057 --> 00:05:45,425
- A lot of fun.
- That was a long time ago.
181
00:05:45,461 --> 00:05:47,160
I'm with Craig now.
182
00:05:47,196 --> 00:05:47,973
Oh, that's interesting,
183
00:05:47,997 --> 00:05:49,207
because when you just said that,
184
00:05:49,231 --> 00:05:51,264
you were actually
staring at my quadriceps.
185
00:05:51,300 --> 00:05:53,367
No, I wasn't.
186
00:05:53,402 --> 00:05:54,501
I don't know.
187
00:05:54,536 --> 00:05:55,869
EDIE: I'm gonna...
188
00:05:55,904 --> 00:05:57,537
go make some hummus.
189
00:05:57,573 --> 00:05:58,405
Okay.
190
00:05:58,440 --> 00:05:59,639
No problem.
191
00:05:59,675 --> 00:06:00,474
(clears throat)
192
00:06:00,509 --> 00:06:02,576
- Hmm.
- Excuse me.
193
00:06:02,611 --> 00:06:04,878
EDIE: This is Craig.
194
00:06:04,913 --> 00:06:06,179
My fiancé.
195
00:06:06,215 --> 00:06:07,525
CRAIG: It's a pleasure
to finally meet you.
196
00:06:07,549 --> 00:06:09,182
EDIE: Craig teaches
at an online college.
197
00:06:09,218 --> 00:06:12,319
- CRAIG: My fiancée.
- EDIE: My fiancé... cé... cé...
198
00:06:12,354 --> 00:06:15,222
Fiancé? Huh. Give it a
week and Edie will be all like,
199
00:06:15,257 --> 00:06:16,990
"Oh, Zorn, please cut Craig in half."
200
00:06:17,026 --> 00:06:18,303
And I'll be like, "Yeah, no problem."
201
00:06:18,327 --> 00:06:19,593
- (yells)
- (thud)
202
00:06:19,628 --> 00:06:21,028
- Oh. Uh-oh.
- (bus ending rumbling)
203
00:06:21,063 --> 00:06:22,596
Uh-oh, look at this, look at this.
204
00:06:22,631 --> 00:06:23,830
I know who's in there.
205
00:06:23,866 --> 00:06:25,499
(laughing): Yeah, here we go.
206
00:06:25,534 --> 00:06:27,334
(brakes squeaking)
207
00:06:27,369 --> 00:06:28,602
Alangulon!
208
00:06:28,637 --> 00:06:30,404
Son of Zorn!
209
00:06:30,439 --> 00:06:32,506
Come out little boy, where are you?
210
00:06:32,541 --> 00:06:33,774
No, no, no.
211
00:06:33,809 --> 00:06:34,935
- Hello?
- He's half-naked,
212
00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:36,588
- I know you're in there.
- Waving his sword around again.
213
00:06:36,612 --> 00:06:38,857
Oh, my God, that's exactly what
you didn't want him to do.
214
00:06:38,881 --> 00:06:40,047
Don't make me tear this bus
215
00:06:40,082 --> 00:06:42,049
and all its occupants
to shreds. (chuckles)
216
00:06:42,084 --> 00:06:45,021
- Uh, driver, we-we should... can we go?
- ZORN: Hello?
217
00:06:45,206 --> 00:06:46,364
Uh, this guy back here
is freaking me out.
218
00:06:46,388 --> 00:06:47,954
He's super weird, I don't know him.
219
00:06:47,990 --> 00:06:49,801
- ZORN: I know you're in there.
- (door closing, engine rumbles)
220
00:06:49,825 --> 00:06:53,593
Uh... Alangulon?
221
00:06:57,032 --> 00:06:59,566
- Alan?
- Alan.
222
00:06:59,601 --> 00:07:02,736
- Hey.
- Where have you been?
223
00:07:02,771 --> 00:07:04,704
Yeah, I had, uh, my phone
off, or whatever, yeah.
224
00:07:04,740 --> 00:07:06,506
You knew your dad was coming over.
225
00:07:06,542 --> 00:07:08,508
He left you a birthday present.
226
00:07:08,544 --> 00:07:10,310
My birthday was three weeks ago.
227
00:07:10,345 --> 00:07:11,611
- I know.
- This is from Dad?
228
00:07:11,647 --> 00:07:14,848
I wrapped it, yeah.
229
00:07:14,883 --> 00:07:16,316
It's a brain gouger.
230
00:07:16,351 --> 00:07:17,584
A brain gouger.
231
00:07:17,619 --> 00:07:19,097
Why did I think he'd
be different this time?
232
00:07:19,121 --> 00:07:20,554
He doesn't have a clue.
233
00:07:20,589 --> 00:07:21,555
What an idiot.
234
00:07:21,590 --> 00:07:22,956
Alan, hearing how mad you are
235
00:07:22,991 --> 00:07:24,658
makes me want to take that brain gouger
236
00:07:24,693 --> 00:07:26,326
and gouge your brain out.
237
00:07:26,361 --> 00:07:27,494
- What?
- Honey.
238
00:07:27,529 --> 00:07:28,628
No, the part of your brain
239
00:07:28,664 --> 00:07:30,063
called the limbic system.
240
00:07:30,099 --> 00:07:32,365
It's the thing that's making
you angry right now.
241
00:07:32,401 --> 00:07:34,367
Oh, thanks, Craig.
242
00:07:34,403 --> 00:07:36,870
So... do you want to
call your dad or...?
243
00:07:36,905 --> 00:07:39,873
Nope, I'll just, you know,
wait around for another three years.
244
00:07:39,908 --> 00:07:42,068
Maybe I'll talk to him then
or something. I don't know.
245
00:07:43,312 --> 00:07:44,622
Hey, sweetie, do you
think he understood...
246
00:07:44,646 --> 00:07:46,046
- He understands.
- Okay.
247
00:07:46,081 --> 00:07:46,958
(Headbutt Man shouting on phone)
248
00:07:46,982 --> 00:07:48,048
ZORN: Aw, come on.
249
00:07:48,083 --> 00:07:49,368
Don't kill all the Glombeasts
250
00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:50,528
before I get back tomorrow.
251
00:07:50,552 --> 00:07:52,152
At least save me a couple wounded ones
252
00:07:52,187 --> 00:07:54,321
- I can mess around with.
- All right. All right.
253
00:07:54,356 --> 00:07:55,555
Hey, how are things going
254
00:07:55,591 --> 00:07:56,890
with Alangulon, by the way?
255
00:07:56,925 --> 00:07:57,924
Um... terrific.
256
00:07:57,960 --> 00:07:59,259
Yeah, he's playing soccer
257
00:07:59,294 --> 00:08:00,705
with his bus driver's head as we speak.
258
00:08:00,729 --> 00:08:01,962
Hey, son!
259
00:08:01,997 --> 00:08:03,608
Why don't you knock that
off and go do your homework,
260
00:08:03,632 --> 00:08:04,598
you dead-eyed killer.
261
00:08:04,633 --> 00:08:06,032
(car door closes)
262
00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:07,908
- I got to call you back.
- (scream over phone)
263
00:08:20,449 --> 00:08:22,215
- (car alarm chirps)
- What the hell?
264
00:08:22,251 --> 00:08:24,384
Zorn?
265
00:08:24,419 --> 00:08:26,786
Wow, Edie, this is, like,
above and beyond.
266
00:08:26,822 --> 00:08:28,388
Hot Pockets!
267
00:08:28,423 --> 00:08:29,756
(laughing): Oh, all righ...
268
00:08:29,791 --> 00:08:31,391
oh, oh, oh.
269
00:08:31,426 --> 00:08:33,505
They didn't have the Bacon
Cheddar Cheese Melt flavor?
270
00:08:33,529 --> 00:08:35,495
- I don't know, Zorn.
- Oh, no, no, I'm sorry.
271
00:08:35,531 --> 00:08:37,297
It's good. It's great, it's great.
272
00:08:37,332 --> 00:08:39,166
Thank you. I'm, uh, I'm just gonna...
273
00:08:39,201 --> 00:08:41,401
I'm gonna save these
for later, you know?
274
00:08:41,436 --> 00:08:42,447
Just had a cat
right before you got here,
275
00:08:42,471 --> 00:08:43,448
so a little stuffed and...
276
00:08:43,472 --> 00:08:45,205
uh... yeah.
277
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:46,640
So, hey, um,
278
00:08:46,675 --> 00:08:49,242
do-do you know what's going
on with Alangulon?
279
00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:50,877
Uh, 'cause my flight leaves Sunday.
280
00:08:50,913 --> 00:08:53,246
I mean, is he not
gonna see me before I go?
281
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:55,549
- He might be a little upset.
- Upset?!
282
00:08:55,584 --> 00:08:56,816
(scoffs) That... you know,
283
00:08:56,852 --> 00:08:58,385
that brain gouger wasn't cheap.
284
00:08:58,420 --> 00:09:00,954
Well, you haven't
exactly been around much, Zorn.
285
00:09:00,989 --> 00:09:03,134
I mean, you come to visit every
few years and even then,
286
00:09:03,158 --> 00:09:04,357
you only stay for a weekend.
287
00:09:04,393 --> 00:09:05,670
How do you think that makes him feel?
288
00:09:05,694 --> 00:09:06,760
Yeah, well, I'm sorry.
289
00:09:06,795 --> 00:09:08,028
I've been busy, you know,
290
00:09:08,063 --> 00:09:09,529
fighting for my homeland
291
00:09:09,565 --> 00:09:10,942
and making sure
Vulchazor doesn't get his hands
292
00:09:10,966 --> 00:09:12,065
on the staff of Quiv, okay?
293
00:09:12,100 --> 00:09:14,167
The staff of Quiv is just a stick.
294
00:09:14,203 --> 00:09:17,620
- Yeah, but it's our stick.
- Alan isn't a kid anymore,
295
00:09:17,747 --> 00:09:19,506
and I'm just worried
you're gonna lose him.
296
00:09:19,541 --> 00:09:21,274
You need to be here.
297
00:09:21,310 --> 00:09:23,176
Uh, Edie, news flash.
298
00:09:23,212 --> 00:09:24,511
- I am here.
- No, but...
299
00:09:24,546 --> 00:09:26,246
for good. Get an apartment.
300
00:09:26,281 --> 00:09:28,081
Get to know him.
301
00:09:28,116 --> 00:09:32,018
This could be your last
chance to become part of Alan's life.
302
00:09:32,054 --> 00:09:34,287
(Edie sighs)
303
00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:37,857
I got to go before the
dry cleaners close.
304
00:09:37,893 --> 00:09:40,360
Let me know if that's not enough
toilet paper for you.
305
00:09:40,395 --> 00:09:41,773
Yeah, just looking at it right now,
306
00:09:41,797 --> 00:09:42,974
I can tell you that's not enough.
307
00:09:42,998 --> 00:09:44,731
HEADBUTT MAN (muffled): Hey, dude.
308
00:09:44,766 --> 00:09:47,133
I was listening to that
entire conversation.
309
00:09:47,169 --> 00:09:50,170
I was 90% sure that
was gonna end in sex.
310
00:09:50,205 --> 00:09:52,172
Yeah, yeah, but I-I don't
know, maybe she's right.
311
00:09:52,207 --> 00:09:53,506
HEADBUTT MAN: No, she's not.
312
00:09:53,542 --> 00:09:55,775
I didn't spend any time with my son
313
00:09:55,811 --> 00:09:57,978
when he was growing
up, and he turned out fine.
314
00:09:58,013 --> 00:09:59,012
See?
315
00:09:59,047 --> 00:10:00,614
Wait, wait, no!
316
00:10:00,649 --> 00:10:01,881
(screams)
317
00:10:01,917 --> 00:10:03,617
Oh, my sweet boy!
318
00:10:03,652 --> 00:10:04,985
Oh, God, no!
319
00:10:05,020 --> 00:10:07,387
I should have spent more time with you!
320
00:10:07,422 --> 00:10:10,357
(crying): I'd give
anything for one more second.
321
00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:12,492
Hey, Zorn, are you still on?
322
00:10:12,527 --> 00:10:14,294
I got to go, son cut in half.
323
00:10:14,329 --> 00:10:15,996
(phone beeps)
324
00:10:16,031 --> 00:10:19,633
MAN: It's $750 a month, plus utilities.
325
00:10:19,668 --> 00:10:20,834
Mm-hmm. I'll take it.
326
00:10:20,869 --> 00:10:22,469
- (car alarm blaring)
- Great.
327
00:10:22,504 --> 00:10:24,249
- Couple things you should know.
- Yeah, lay it on me.
328
00:10:24,273 --> 00:10:26,339
The girls in 6B are gonna
tell you I spy on them
329
00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:27,707
and that I put a camera
330
00:10:27,743 --> 00:10:28,853
- behind their bathroom mirror.
- 6B.
331
00:10:28,877 --> 00:10:30,243
- Okay.
- They're liars.
332
00:10:30,279 --> 00:10:31,945
- Naturally.
- And they're sluts.
333
00:10:31,980 --> 00:10:34,981
Also, I'll need the
first two months rent up front.
334
00:10:35,017 --> 00:10:36,661
Yeah, here you go. This
should take care of it.
335
00:10:36,685 --> 00:10:38,985
You know, there's actually a
couple extra jewels on there,
336
00:10:39,021 --> 00:10:40,798
so you can just apply
that to my next month's rent.
337
00:10:40,822 --> 00:10:42,722
ZORN: Well, actually,
338
00:10:42,758 --> 00:10:44,924
I managed a whole team
339
00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:46,626
of mutilators by myself, yeah.
340
00:10:46,662 --> 00:10:48,061
A-and then, well, then I would
341
00:10:48,096 --> 00:10:50,330
coordinate the sharing of intelligence
342
00:10:50,365 --> 00:10:52,932
between my department
and-and The Fanged One.
343
00:10:52,968 --> 00:10:55,568
Oh, so... you're a coordinator.
344
00:10:55,604 --> 00:10:57,282
I mean, I was basically
doing the coordinator's job.
345
00:10:57,306 --> 00:10:58,549
Everybody knew it. You
know, the guy was a...
346
00:10:58,573 --> 00:10:59,884
(whispering): the guy was an alcoholic.
347
00:10:59,908 --> 00:11:02,509
No judgment, but, you
know, we got a job to do.
348
00:11:02,544 --> 00:11:03,910
You do realize you're applying for
349
00:11:03,945 --> 00:11:05,478
an entry-level sales position.
350
00:11:05,514 --> 00:11:08,348
You'd be selling industrial
soap dispensers.
351
00:11:08,383 --> 00:11:10,216
Definitely. Oh, yeah,
no, that sounds great.
352
00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:11,629
Really look forward... you
know, back in Zephyria...
353
00:11:11,653 --> 00:11:12,852
Zephyria?
354
00:11:12,888 --> 00:11:14,587
Uh, the... island nation of Zephyria.
355
00:11:14,623 --> 00:11:15,789
I found
356
00:11:15,824 --> 00:11:19,592
the dispensing of-of
soap, uh, to be very, uh...
357
00:11:19,628 --> 00:11:20,796
Do you own a shirt?
358
00:11:20,903 --> 00:11:22,540
Does a Grithian
herdsman have nine anuses?
359
00:11:22,564 --> 00:11:23,763
What?
360
00:11:23,799 --> 00:11:25,732
- Yes, I have a shirt.
- Hey, it's Alan.
361
00:11:25,767 --> 00:11:27,133
Leave a message.
362
00:11:27,169 --> 00:11:29,035
ZORN: Hey, Alangulon, it's Dad.
363
00:11:29,071 --> 00:11:30,915
I just wanted to let you
know I'm in town just...
364
00:11:30,939 --> 00:11:33,406
settling in, got a
place. Got a job lined up.
365
00:11:33,442 --> 00:11:35,608
This is a big move for
me, but, uh, you know,
366
00:11:35,644 --> 00:11:36,888
it's time for me to get to know my boy.
367
00:11:36,912 --> 00:11:38,489
So, uh, I say just, you
know, call me back
368
00:11:38,513 --> 00:11:40,637
- when you get th...
- (phone beeps)
369
00:11:40,639 --> 00:11:41,559
AUTOMATED FEMALE VOICE:
If you are satisfied with
370
00:11:41,583 --> 00:11:43,049
- your message, press one.
- Wha...?
371
00:11:43,085 --> 00:11:44,584
To review your message, press two.
372
00:11:44,619 --> 00:11:46,286
Oh.
373
00:11:46,321 --> 00:11:49,456
Hey, Alangulon, it's Dad again.
374
00:11:49,491 --> 00:11:51,157
Well, not again, not to you, at least.
375
00:11:51,193 --> 00:11:52,603
You know, I-I tried to leave a message
376
00:11:52,627 --> 00:11:54,794
before but for whatever
reason the, uh, little, uh...
377
00:11:54,830 --> 00:11:57,297
the voice mail thing, uh, cut me off.
378
00:11:57,332 --> 00:11:59,366
Anyway, okay, so, um...
379
00:11:59,401 --> 00:12:02,335
anyway, what I was saying
was, um... where do I start?
380
00:12:02,371 --> 00:12:03,848
Okay, oh, from the
beginning. Okay, so, uh,
381
00:12:03,872 --> 00:12:05,705
- I'm in town, I got a pla...
- (phone beeps)
382
00:12:05,741 --> 00:12:06,918
If you are satisfied
with your message...
383
00:12:06,942 --> 00:12:08,186
No, I'm not satisfied with my message!
384
00:12:08,210 --> 00:12:09,554
- To review your message...
- No, I don't, no,
385
00:12:09,578 --> 00:12:11,378
I don't want to leave a new message.
386
00:12:11,413 --> 00:12:12,779
I want to leave an old message...
387
00:12:12,814 --> 00:12:15,281
The one that I was leaving
two messages ago, actually.
388
00:12:15,317 --> 00:12:16,594
(on voice mail): Alangulon, Dad.
389
00:12:16,618 --> 00:12:17,795
- Got a place, got a job...
- (phone beeps)
390
00:12:17,819 --> 00:12:19,986
Damn it! Damn you! Damn...
391
00:12:26,117 --> 00:12:28,450
Do I really have to go do this?
392
00:12:28,486 --> 00:12:32,187
Look, I know you haven't
always had the best relationship
393
00:12:32,223 --> 00:12:36,992
with your dad, but he's
really making an effort to change.
394
00:12:37,028 --> 00:12:39,061
ZORN: Oh, nuts!
395
00:12:39,096 --> 00:12:40,295
The window was up.
396
00:12:40,331 --> 00:12:41,942
(muffled): I was
hoping to hit you in the face.
397
00:12:41,966 --> 00:12:43,532
Ah, that would have been hilarious,
398
00:12:43,567 --> 00:12:45,734
but your faces were good enough.
399
00:12:45,770 --> 00:12:47,069
You guys looked so scared.
400
00:12:47,104 --> 00:12:49,304
(muffled): Hey, don't
worry about that, okay?
401
00:12:49,340 --> 00:12:50,717
That's-that's not
gonna be a problem at all.
402
00:12:50,741 --> 00:12:52,474
Paper towel will get that right off.
403
00:12:52,510 --> 00:12:54,009
Oh, problem solved. Thanks, Zorn.
404
00:12:54,045 --> 00:12:55,844
- Alangulon! Come here,
- Hey, Dad.
405
00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:57,691
- You little psycho.
- I'm fine. I don't really want to...
406
00:12:57,715 --> 00:12:58,992
Let me throw your ass up into
the air and catch you.
407
00:12:59,016 --> 00:13:01,030
- Come here. Get over here, I got you.
- No. no!
408
00:13:01,031 --> 00:13:02,996
Zorn! He doesn't want
to be thrown in the air.
409
00:13:03,020 --> 00:13:05,254
He's 17 and he just ate.
410
00:13:05,289 --> 00:13:07,189
Yeah, no, right, right,
right, no, sorry, sorry.
411
00:13:08,059 --> 00:13:10,926
(Zorn grunting)
412
00:13:12,596 --> 00:13:15,698
Oh, hey, at, uh,
work, my boss, you know?
413
00:13:15,733 --> 00:13:18,200
Looks and talks exactly like a woman.
414
00:13:18,235 --> 00:13:20,536
I mean, the guy's going all
out, too... he wear skirts.
415
00:13:20,571 --> 00:13:22,604
I mean, you know, he's
carrying a, uh, a purse,
416
00:13:22,640 --> 00:13:23,772
he uses tampons.
417
00:13:23,808 --> 00:13:26,341
Yeah, I mean, he has
tampons in his purse.
418
00:13:26,377 --> 00:13:28,844
Honestly, if he wasn't above
me in the chain of command,
419
00:13:28,879 --> 00:13:30,367
I'd swear he was a woman.
420
00:13:30,369 --> 00:13:32,192
- Sounds like that's a woman.
- No, no, son.
421
00:13:32,216 --> 00:13:34,249
You're not listening. He's my superior.
422
00:13:34,285 --> 00:13:35,584
Hey, I got a question for you.
423
00:13:35,619 --> 00:13:37,219
What's the deal with that Craig guy?
424
00:13:37,254 --> 00:13:38,520
Craig? He's great.
425
00:13:38,556 --> 00:13:39,655
He's really nice.
426
00:13:39,690 --> 00:13:41,724
I've never seen Mom happier, uh-huh.
427
00:13:41,759 --> 00:13:43,399
Oh, yeah, no, I want
to kill his ass, too.
428
00:13:43,427 --> 00:13:45,527
All righty, you ready to
give it a go, Alangulon?
429
00:13:45,563 --> 00:13:46,707
Oh, you know what you can do?
430
00:13:46,731 --> 00:13:48,263
Pretend the balls are Craig's head.
431
00:13:48,299 --> 00:13:49,531
No, thanks.
432
00:13:50,768 --> 00:13:53,736
Look, I know this
is tough for you, okay?
433
00:13:53,771 --> 00:13:55,571
I've been out of your
life for a long time
434
00:13:55,606 --> 00:13:56,917
and there's a lot that I've missed.
435
00:13:56,941 --> 00:13:58,674
Just a decade. (chuckles)
436
00:13:58,709 --> 00:14:02,745
Right, but the point
is, I'm here now, and that...
437
00:14:03,981 --> 00:14:05,748
...erases everything bad I did.
438
00:14:05,783 --> 00:14:07,594
- Let's get some food, shall we?
- Are you for real?
439
00:14:07,618 --> 00:14:09,062
- Food whore! Waitress!
- Are you just...?
440
00:14:09,086 --> 00:14:10,597
- Say it's gonna be all-all fine now?
- You guys ready?
441
00:14:10,621 --> 00:14:11,998
Yeah, we're gonna both have the rib eye.
442
00:14:12,022 --> 00:14:14,323
- No, uh...
- And how would you like that cooked?
443
00:14:14,358 --> 00:14:15,758
Uh... not...
444
00:14:15,793 --> 00:14:17,259
I think, not, right? Yeah.
445
00:14:17,294 --> 00:14:18,660
Two rib eyes, both not.
446
00:14:18,696 --> 00:14:20,373
Actually, I'll have the
veggie wrap, please.
447
00:14:20,397 --> 00:14:21,942
- Oh, that's awesome. Great choice.
- One second, I'm sorry.
448
00:14:21,966 --> 00:14:23,465
You're confused, Alangulon.
449
00:14:23,501 --> 00:14:26,435
It says here the veggie wrap
is, it's only vegetables.
450
00:14:26,470 --> 00:14:27,736
Yeah, I'm a vegetarian.
451
00:14:27,772 --> 00:14:29,538
Maybe 'cause I'm,
like, informed and stuff.
452
00:14:29,573 --> 00:14:32,174
Oh, you should try the
carrot-ginger-kale juice.
453
00:14:32,209 --> 00:14:33,542
- Oh, really?
- Uh-huh.
454
00:14:33,577 --> 00:14:35,322
- Okay, I'm all about ginger, yeah.
- Oh, my God.
455
00:14:35,346 --> 00:14:38,147
- Yeah, bring on the ging.
- Bringing on the ging.
456
00:14:38,182 --> 00:14:39,593
- What the hell is happening?
- ALAN: It's like the hard stuff.
457
00:14:39,617 --> 00:14:41,027
- Double shot, no problem.
- Ginger is actually
458
00:14:41,051 --> 00:14:42,529
- really good for you.
- ZORN: You know what I drink?
459
00:14:42,553 --> 00:14:43,597
The blood of my fallen enemies
460
00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:45,621
out of the skulls of their children.
461
00:14:47,057 --> 00:14:48,023
Hey.
462
00:14:48,058 --> 00:14:49,391
You're Alan, right?
463
00:14:49,426 --> 00:14:50,726
- I'm Nancy.
- Cool.
464
00:14:50,761 --> 00:14:51,727
- Hey.
- I think I live
465
00:14:51,762 --> 00:14:53,337
- in your neighborhood.
- Oh.
466
00:14:53,472 --> 00:14:55,130
I drive past you
467
00:14:55,166 --> 00:14:57,599
sometimes... at the bus stop?
468
00:14:57,635 --> 00:14:59,279
Oh, I don't think that's...
that's probably not me.
469
00:14:59,303 --> 00:15:01,637
- I don't do the bus, really, so...
- Yeah, you do.
470
00:15:01,672 --> 00:15:02,716
Just the other day, your
mother was telling me
471
00:15:02,740 --> 00:15:03,639
how you take the bus.
472
00:15:03,674 --> 00:15:04,618
I didn't...
473
00:15:04,769 --> 00:15:06,153
ZORN: Oh, he definitely takes the bus.
474
00:15:06,177 --> 00:15:07,775
Why are you telling her
you're not taking the bus?
475
00:15:07,777 --> 00:15:09,990
Amazing people have
taken the bus, you know?
476
00:15:10,014 --> 00:15:12,014
You got Rosa Parks, took the bus.
477
00:15:12,049 --> 00:15:13,916
Even more famous than her, Keanu Reeves.
478
00:15:13,951 --> 00:15:15,951
For 100 minutes of
packed action, he did.
479
00:15:15,986 --> 00:15:17,319
(Zorn laughs)
480
00:15:17,354 --> 00:15:18,821
What? What'd I do?
481
00:15:18,856 --> 00:15:19,900
- Just tell me.
- I like your bracelet.
482
00:15:19,924 --> 00:15:20,956
- Thanks.
- It's cool.
483
00:15:20,991 --> 00:15:22,324
Oh, you a big bracelet nut?
484
00:15:22,359 --> 00:15:24,271
- Check this one out. Hey, look at that.
- (gasps)
485
00:15:24,295 --> 00:15:25,906
- Watch yourself.
- Dad, put that away. This is ridiculous.
486
00:15:25,930 --> 00:15:27,574
- Please tell me you're joking.
- You can't be in here with that.
487
00:15:27,598 --> 00:15:28,809
- I'm sorry.
- NANCY: Okay. No, seriously, guys.
488
00:15:28,833 --> 00:15:30,243
Right, yeah. Why, 'cause I'm
gonna kill you with it?
489
00:15:30,267 --> 00:15:31,845
- Come here, come here,
I'm gonna kill you! - Oh, my God!
490
00:15:31,869 --> 00:15:33,402
- Don't murder her!
- Tom!
491
00:15:33,437 --> 00:15:34,937
Whoa, whoa, whoa. No. I was joking.
492
00:15:34,972 --> 00:15:36,650
- Gone! You're gone. Put that away,
you're gone. -Whoa. Okay.
493
00:15:36,674 --> 00:15:38,018
- So gone.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, you got it.
494
00:15:38,042 --> 00:15:38,985
- Put that away!
- Yes, sir.
495
00:15:39,009 --> 00:15:40,387
Hey, I hear you. Dad joke gone bad.
496
00:15:40,411 --> 00:15:42,511
(phone ringing)
497
00:15:44,481 --> 00:15:45,966
(sighs heavily)
498
00:15:46,100 --> 00:15:47,082
♪ ♪
499
00:15:47,117 --> 00:15:48,984
LITTLE ALAN: Whee!
500
00:15:49,019 --> 00:15:50,452
Higher, Dad!
501
00:15:50,487 --> 00:15:53,155
- One, two... three!
- Oh...
502
00:15:53,190 --> 00:15:55,324
Alangulon.
503
00:15:55,359 --> 00:15:58,360
Why do you suck so bad now?
504
00:15:58,395 --> 00:15:59,728
(sighs)
505
00:15:59,763 --> 00:16:00,963
LINDA: Zorn?
506
00:16:00,998 --> 00:16:02,030
What?!
507
00:16:02,066 --> 00:16:04,499
Can I see you for a second?
508
00:16:06,270 --> 00:16:09,171
It looks to me like it was
done with a giant sword.
509
00:16:09,206 --> 00:16:11,039
Ah, that's too bad. I love that table.
510
00:16:11,075 --> 00:16:12,352
Do you know anyone in the office
511
00:16:12,376 --> 00:16:13,842
who would do something like this?
512
00:16:13,878 --> 00:16:15,043
Um...
513
00:16:15,079 --> 00:16:17,613
First thought, Margie in HR.
514
00:16:17,648 --> 00:16:19,381
That is not a name
515
00:16:19,416 --> 00:16:22,184
I have ever heard before in my life.
516
00:16:22,219 --> 00:16:23,552
Take a seat, Zorn.
517
00:16:23,587 --> 00:16:25,932
O-Okay, okay, it's just,
you've got to understand something.
518
00:16:25,956 --> 00:16:27,589
I need this job.
519
00:16:27,625 --> 00:16:28,924
It's just been weird being back
520
00:16:28,959 --> 00:16:30,503
and around my
ex-wife, who's now engaged,
521
00:16:30,527 --> 00:16:32,995
and that's stirring up a
lot of emotions for me...
522
00:16:33,030 --> 00:16:35,197
Look, I'm trying to make
things right with my son,
523
00:16:35,232 --> 00:16:36,394
and he's just not getting it.
524
00:16:36,395 --> 00:16:38,645
And he's acting all weird
about taking the bus, it's like...
525
00:16:38,669 --> 00:16:40,380
- Okay. Let's just, uh...
- I don't think he's even seen
526
00:16:40,404 --> 00:16:41,570
the movie Speed before.
527
00:16:41,605 --> 00:16:42,771
Which is a whole other thing.
528
00:16:42,806 --> 00:16:44,706
- Zorn.
- Sorry. Sorry, go ahead.
529
00:16:44,742 --> 00:16:46,508
I didn't bring you in here to fire you.
530
00:16:46,543 --> 00:16:47,775
Oh, thank God.
531
00:16:47,890 --> 00:16:49,789
You don't think I want to
smash a table sometimes?
532
00:16:49,813 --> 00:16:51,324
You don't think I want to box the ears
533
00:16:51,348 --> 00:16:53,415
of that gum-snapping
receptionist like you did?
534
00:16:53,450 --> 00:16:55,262
Oh, no, she's the worst. I
almost chopped her in half.
535
00:16:55,286 --> 00:16:56,885
See that, Zorn?
536
00:16:56,921 --> 00:16:58,921
What you got there, that's passion.
537
00:16:58,956 --> 00:17:00,756
- You got a fire in you.
- That's right!
538
00:17:00,791 --> 00:17:02,280
A fire that will consume anyone
539
00:17:02,281 --> 00:17:03,770
- that stands in my way!
- A fire
540
00:17:03,794 --> 00:17:05,027
you gotta rein in.
541
00:17:05,062 --> 00:17:06,929
Gotta rein in that fire. Yeah. Exactly.
542
00:17:06,964 --> 00:17:09,331
Just... try to be more considerate.
543
00:17:09,366 --> 00:17:10,565
You know what that means?
544
00:17:10,601 --> 00:17:11,801
Uh, no, of course I do, yeah.
545
00:17:11,918 --> 00:17:13,546
Considerate. It's when
you look at someone
546
00:17:13,570 --> 00:17:15,837
- and imagine them melting.
- No.
547
00:17:15,873 --> 00:17:18,040
Yeah, no, it's... it's
like when two horses die
548
00:17:18,075 --> 00:17:19,886
- at the exact same time.
- I'll just tell you.
549
00:17:19,910 --> 00:17:23,478
It means you're thinking about
what other people want
550
00:17:23,514 --> 00:17:25,614
and not just what you want.
551
00:17:25,649 --> 00:17:27,049
Huh. Really?
552
00:17:27,084 --> 00:17:28,951
Yeah, we don't have
that concept in Zephyria.
553
00:17:28,986 --> 00:17:30,819
Yeah. No, but it's
good, though. I like it.
554
00:17:30,854 --> 00:17:32,220
Oh! You know what?
555
00:17:32,256 --> 00:17:34,556
I can use that idea on my son.
556
00:17:34,591 --> 00:17:36,591
You could also use that here at work.
557
00:17:36,627 --> 00:17:38,026
Hey.
558
00:17:38,062 --> 00:17:39,361
You're a good guy.
559
00:17:43,339 --> 00:17:45,172
(humming)
560
00:17:45,207 --> 00:17:46,473
ZORN: Hey, Alangulon...
561
00:17:46,508 --> 00:17:48,942
You know how you hate taking the bus?
562
00:17:48,978 --> 00:17:50,344
- Yeah?
- Well, why don't you
563
00:17:50,379 --> 00:17:52,379
come outside, check out your new ride?
564
00:17:59,603 --> 00:18:00,636
(Zorn laughs)
565
00:18:00,671 --> 00:18:02,004
What do you think?
566
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:02,971
It's all yours.
567
00:18:03,007 --> 00:18:04,606
(screams)
568
00:18:04,642 --> 00:18:05,774
Wait, this is for me?
569
00:18:05,810 --> 00:18:06,842
- This is mine?
- Yeah.
570
00:18:06,877 --> 00:18:08,243
No more waiting at the bus stop
571
00:18:08,279 --> 00:18:09,578
for my son.
572
00:18:09,613 --> 00:18:11,458
- You paid attention to something I said?
- That's right.
573
00:18:11,482 --> 00:18:12,748
Because I'm considerate,
574
00:18:12,783 --> 00:18:13,949
my sweet little boy.
575
00:18:13,984 --> 00:18:15,317
Wow. (laughs)
576
00:18:15,352 --> 00:18:16,496
Go ahead, take it for a spin.
577
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:17,653
Uh-oh!
578
00:18:17,688 --> 00:18:19,755
- (laughs)
- ALAN: Sorry.
579
00:18:19,790 --> 00:18:21,356
You never taught me how to catch, so...
580
00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:22,758
Now, look, it's an older model,
581
00:18:22,793 --> 00:18:25,694
so it's going to have some
parasites living in its flesh.
582
00:18:25,729 --> 00:18:27,396
But the talons are still razor-sharp
583
00:18:27,431 --> 00:18:29,164
and it handles great on murder swoops.
584
00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:30,332
No! No! No!
585
00:18:30,367 --> 00:18:33,202
That is going right
back where it came from!
586
00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:35,137
- But Mom, it can fly!
- (squawks quietly)
587
00:18:35,172 --> 00:18:37,058
I don't care if it can
spit out flesh-eating slime.
588
00:18:37,058 --> 00:18:39,675
- ZORN: Which it can.
- I want it out of my driveway.
589
00:18:39,710 --> 00:18:40,676
Oh, come on.
590
00:18:40,711 --> 00:18:41,688
Don't act like you never rode
591
00:18:41,712 --> 00:18:43,178
a death hawk, Edie.
592
00:18:43,214 --> 00:18:44,146
Okay, I was 19.
593
00:18:44,181 --> 00:18:45,447
I was coked out of my mind.
594
00:18:45,482 --> 00:18:46,493
Y... Don't try to change the subject.
595
00:18:46,517 --> 00:18:47,983
This is what you do, Zorn.
596
00:18:48,018 --> 00:18:49,729
- Oh. Oh, okay, yeah.
- You're gonna come in here, make a big
597
00:18:49,753 --> 00:18:51,131
- mess and then disappear.
- Tell me everything about me.
598
00:18:51,155 --> 00:18:53,422
- And who's left to clean it up?
- (screams)
599
00:18:53,457 --> 00:18:54,968
Look at that thing. It stinks, it's huge
600
00:18:54,992 --> 00:18:56,658
and he doesn't have a helmet.
601
00:18:56,694 --> 00:18:59,061
Uh, maybe if Alangulon were the
fruit of your loins, Craig,
602
00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:01,029
your opinion would actually matter here.
603
00:19:01,065 --> 00:19:02,731
But he's not, so it doesn't, shut up.
604
00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:04,967
Okay, class, well, I've
been emasculated again.
605
00:19:05,002 --> 00:19:07,436
And, uh, so we're
gonna cut this class short.
606
00:19:07,471 --> 00:19:08,437
EDIE: Alan!
607
00:19:08,472 --> 00:19:09,872
- I said no!
- ALAN: What?
608
00:19:09,907 --> 00:19:11,206
- Why?
- ZORN: Fly, son!
609
00:19:11,242 --> 00:19:13,275
- Fly away!
- Zorn, if you don't
610
00:19:13,310 --> 00:19:15,455
get rid of this thing right
now, I'm calling Animal Control.
611
00:19:15,479 --> 00:19:17,479
Oh, no, no. This bird would
kill Animal Control,
612
00:19:17,514 --> 00:19:19,793
- if it wasn't so heavily sedated
as it is right now. - Zorn...
613
00:19:19,817 --> 00:19:20,782
I'm not kidding.
614
00:19:20,818 --> 00:19:21,717
I want it out, now.
615
00:19:21,752 --> 00:19:23,719
(Alan sighs, death hawk screams)
616
00:19:23,754 --> 00:19:25,187
Fine. Geez.
617
00:19:25,222 --> 00:19:26,655
Guy tries to bring
618
00:19:26,690 --> 00:19:28,390
a gift to his son, you know,
619
00:19:28,425 --> 00:19:29,903
and just be considerate of his feelings
620
00:19:29,927 --> 00:19:31,460
and his emotions...
621
00:19:31,495 --> 00:19:32,839
Next thing you know,
he's the bad guy here.
622
00:19:32,863 --> 00:19:34,040
It's like, give me a friggin' break.
623
00:19:34,064 --> 00:19:35,030
ALAN: What the hell?!
624
00:19:35,065 --> 00:19:36,965
- Oh!
- That's a living thing!
625
00:19:37,001 --> 00:19:39,468
- What are you doing?
- What? It was painless.
626
00:19:39,503 --> 00:19:40,847
I just went right
through its spinal cord.
627
00:19:40,871 --> 00:19:42,282
Didn't feel a thing. I've
done this a billion...
628
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:44,206
- (squawking)
- Uh-oh. Here we go.
629
00:19:44,241 --> 00:19:45,908
(grunting)
630
00:19:45,943 --> 00:19:47,309
Oh... come on.
631
00:19:47,344 --> 00:19:48,944
Oh...
632
00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:50,579
- (Zorn grunting)
- I'll get the hose.
633
00:19:51,415 --> 00:19:53,315
Edie, the drought...
634
00:19:53,350 --> 00:19:56,351
(grunting)
635
00:19:56,387 --> 00:19:59,054
ZORN: Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die!
636
00:19:59,089 --> 00:20:00,622
This is the problem with an older one,
637
00:20:00,658 --> 00:20:02,458
is they don't want to
die, so they just won't.
638
00:20:02,493 --> 00:20:04,593
(Zorn grunting)
639
00:20:07,965 --> 00:20:09,431
- (knocking at door)
- EDIE: Alan?
640
00:20:09,466 --> 00:20:10,565
Yeah?
641
00:20:10,601 --> 00:20:12,734
I just wanted to make
sure you were okay.
642
00:20:12,770 --> 00:20:15,270
After what happened with the bird.
643
00:20:15,306 --> 00:20:16,705
I'm fine.
644
00:20:16,740 --> 00:20:18,240
You know, your dad...
645
00:20:18,275 --> 00:20:19,908
he's... he's trying.
646
00:20:19,944 --> 00:20:21,677
He really loves you.
647
00:20:21,712 --> 00:20:24,479
He's just having a hard time realizing
648
00:20:24,515 --> 00:20:26,214
we're nothing like him.
649
00:20:26,250 --> 00:20:28,216
You're not like him at all.
650
00:20:28,252 --> 00:20:31,053
Oh, no, you're right.
I'm-I'm nothing like him.
651
00:20:31,922 --> 00:20:32,955
EDIE: All right.
652
00:20:32,990 --> 00:20:34,290
Good night, sweetie.
653
00:20:34,448 --> 00:20:35,803
Good night, Mom.
654
00:20:48,997 --> 00:20:54,596
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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