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1
00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:04,920
Thank you.
2
00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:54,280
It'd be so good for you Love you like
you want me to
3
00:00:54,280 --> 00:01:01,200
It'd
4
00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:06,800
be so good for you Love you like you
want me to
5
00:01:36,780 --> 00:01:40,400
Here's a special announcement for the
owner and rider of number two, Lily Law.
6
00:01:40,980 --> 00:01:44,020
Will you make your way to the parade
ring as soon as possible?
7
00:02:13,880 --> 00:02:15,860
I don't know what I'm doing here.
8
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I could be doing other things, you know.
9
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The dogs.
10
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Hackney. Dogs?
11
00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,360
Terry, this is where it's at.
12
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Your own county set.
13
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:26,560
The Mark Phillips lot.
14
00:02:27,420 --> 00:02:28,420
Contacts, isn't it?
15
00:02:28,780 --> 00:02:29,980
Combined business with pleasure.
16
00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:32,800
I've got a smashing lance here I'm
trying to unload.
17
00:02:34,180 --> 00:02:36,760
1979 logbook. Only 14 ,000 o 'clock.
18
00:02:37,420 --> 00:02:38,480
Not a trace of rust.
19
00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,200
Got a bomb with a chin. It's wonderful,
I should think.
20
00:02:42,460 --> 00:02:45,900
God, I smell the affluence. You don't
get that at Hackney Dog Track.
21
00:02:47,279 --> 00:02:48,720
Now, it's done.
22
00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:50,800
You're standing in it.
23
00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:03,820
Declarations for the next race, the
adjacent post -maison race, close in ten
24
00:03:03,820 --> 00:03:04,820
minutes' time.
25
00:03:05,820 --> 00:03:07,640
Declarations for the next race...
26
00:03:17,420 --> 00:03:18,420
That's my one.
27
00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:20,420
It's got a bent on it. So?
28
00:03:21,020 --> 00:03:22,420
Wouldn't say no to her either, is it?
29
00:03:22,760 --> 00:03:23,760
Lily Law?
30
00:03:24,540 --> 00:03:28,360
You can't fancy that. What's with a name
like that? You of all people.
31
00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:29,900
I fancy it.
32
00:03:31,340 --> 00:03:33,940
No chance. No chance at all. Look at his
legs.
33
00:03:34,220 --> 00:03:35,360
Look at his own quarters.
34
00:03:37,900 --> 00:03:38,900
What are you going on about as
principal?
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00:03:39,140 --> 00:03:42,340
Want to stick a once on its nose, not
give it one? Yeah, stick a fiver on the
36
00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:43,340
other grave for me.
37
00:03:43,980 --> 00:03:46,060
Be advised, Terry, stand on me.
38
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Lily law.
39
00:03:49,860 --> 00:03:50,860
L -A -H.
40
00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:52,100
L -A -H.
41
00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,120
L -A -H.
42
00:03:53,220 --> 00:03:55,560
L -A -H.
43
00:03:59,460 --> 00:04:03,340
There you go, seven quid on spring
return.
44
00:04:03,930 --> 00:04:06,770
£28 for seven. Spring return. Ticket
number 301.
45
00:04:11,630 --> 00:04:12,630
Excuse me.
46
00:04:14,810 --> 00:04:15,810
There you go.
47
00:04:15,910 --> 00:04:16,909
Four to one.
48
00:04:16,950 --> 00:04:17,950
Four to one?
49
00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:19,050
He must have seen you coming.
50
00:04:19,649 --> 00:04:21,350
Some of the others added a seven to two.
51
00:04:22,670 --> 00:04:23,670
Do it yourself.
52
00:04:24,050 --> 00:04:25,050
A couple of quid, yeah.
53
00:04:39,090 --> 00:04:41,790
Now, just walk up, slowly, slowly.
54
00:04:43,570 --> 00:04:44,810
Slowly on the line.
55
00:04:45,650 --> 00:04:49,070
They're under starter's orders, and
they're off for the open race.
56
00:04:49,390 --> 00:04:52,970
They're settling down, going to the
first. Lily Law goes into the lead.
57
00:04:53,190 --> 00:04:55,510
And at the rear, Spring Return has
started slowly.
58
00:04:55,830 --> 00:05:00,030
Lily Law clear in the lead. Phone bill,
lantern, and fly exchange. I'm on my
59
00:05:00,030 --> 00:05:01,030
side.
60
00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:11,840
Bugger's balked at the first. Billy Law
goes clear, going to the second.
61
00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:16,020
And on the run -in, it's Billy Law
winning easily from flying stations and
62
00:05:16,020 --> 00:05:17,020
bills.
63
00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,620
Here is the result of the open race.
64
00:05:20,180 --> 00:05:23,620
The one I fancy pissed it. That's always
been your problem, Terry, hasn't it?
65
00:05:23,660 --> 00:05:24,519
What has?
66
00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:26,160
Tethering about, chopping and changing.
67
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,360
What's known in the psychiatric
profession as a grasshopper mind.
68
00:05:29,980 --> 00:05:32,100
In the good old days, you could get
treatment for it.
69
00:05:32,380 --> 00:05:36,260
Pelmanism. If you have a fancy, a
feeling in your water, stick to it.
70
00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:39,640
But it was you who talked me out of it.
That's the point I'm trying to make,
71
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:40,760
isn't it? You shouldn't have listened to
me.
72
00:05:40,980 --> 00:05:42,880
You've got to be strong -willed in this
world, Terry.
73
00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:44,600
Implacable, like me.
74
00:05:45,060 --> 00:05:46,940
Now, come on, twist me arm and take me
for a drink.
75
00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:57,160
Listen, if you're going point to point
again, let me know.
76
00:05:57,560 --> 00:05:58,660
I'll arrange to be busy.
77
00:06:02,700 --> 00:06:03,700
Hang about, Terry.
78
00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:05,500
We may have done our bread.
79
00:06:06,410 --> 00:06:08,210
But maybe it's only cast on the waters.
80
00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:09,570
Eh?
81
00:06:09,750 --> 00:06:12,830
Clock the keys in the wind in the
willow's waistcoat and snap your felt
82
00:06:12,830 --> 00:06:13,830
there.
83
00:06:16,050 --> 00:06:17,130
That's Watson Everett.
84
00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:19,170
Who? Watson Everett.
85
00:06:19,690 --> 00:06:23,250
Stroll on. Come in, Terry. He's only one
of your genuine NH trainers.
86
00:06:23,490 --> 00:06:24,490
He's not rubbish.
87
00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:28,070
Hey, that old bloke has got a couple of
jumpers with him.
88
00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:31,050
The Honourable Jeremy Burnham -Jones.
89
00:06:32,110 --> 00:06:33,810
He's swallowed the yuzu or something.
90
00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:38,080
What's the Jeremy Burnham Jones when
it's at home? It's compact, isn't it,
91
00:06:38,100 --> 00:06:40,860
Terry? Only one of your bright and true
blue jet set.
92
00:06:41,460 --> 00:06:43,400
Everly into antique commemorative
pottery.
93
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,280
I'd forgotten he was also everly into
GGs.
94
00:06:46,860 --> 00:06:50,880
So what good's that going to do us?
Because, Terry, as well as being everly
95
00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:54,940
GGs, I am not entirely disassociated
with antique statue work.
96
00:06:55,900 --> 00:06:56,900
Since when?
97
00:06:57,540 --> 00:06:59,440
Subsequent to a favour I did a geezer
yesterday.
98
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:03,660
Can't you, Wade? You.
99
00:07:04,140 --> 00:07:05,140
Why not?
100
00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:08,280
Is there anything you're not into?
101
00:07:09,140 --> 00:07:10,640
Yeah, that's one of two things.
102
00:07:11,340 --> 00:07:13,100
Still, you never know your luck.
103
00:07:14,620 --> 00:07:21,440
An honest
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00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:23,760
opinion. A connoisseur's assessment.
105
00:07:24,380 --> 00:07:25,380
Me?
106
00:07:26,140 --> 00:07:27,140
You.
107
00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:28,680
What it's worth, you mean?
108
00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:29,920
Yeah.
109
00:07:36,650 --> 00:07:38,670
Well, for a start, is it nicked?
110
00:07:39,490 --> 00:07:40,490
Terry.
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It's old, isn't it? Yeah, mid -19th
century, yeah.
112
00:07:45,150 --> 00:07:46,250
Well, it's an ornament.
113
00:07:46,570 --> 00:07:47,690
It's a statue.
114
00:07:48,870 --> 00:07:49,910
It's a geezer.
115
00:07:50,450 --> 00:07:52,690
I don't think Arthur Negus could have
nailed it better.
116
00:07:52,950 --> 00:07:54,110
It's China, Terry.
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00:07:54,350 --> 00:07:55,289
Is it?
118
00:07:55,290 --> 00:07:56,430
You ain't got slant eyes.
119
00:07:56,650 --> 00:07:58,070
Not Chinese China.
120
00:07:58,350 --> 00:08:00,530
Not bamboo shoots and prawn ball China.
121
00:08:01,770 --> 00:08:02,770
Staffordshire China.
122
00:08:02,990 --> 00:08:08,420
Oh. A fine, unrecorded Staffordshire
figure holding a book and resting his
123
00:08:08,420 --> 00:08:13,320
on a pedestal. That is how your bona
fide art world auctioneer will classify
124
00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:14,440
It's Milton.
125
00:08:15,060 --> 00:08:16,060
Milton who?
126
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:18,720
Milton. The false teeth merchant?
127
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,160
The poet Milton.
128
00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:22,560
Paradise lost, paradise got back, all
that.
129
00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:24,520
Go on, go on. Put a price on it.
130
00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:27,680
Yeah, but am I buying or selling?
131
00:08:28,460 --> 00:08:32,400
To the punter, what you are holding,
Terry, is worth 80 quid.
132
00:08:32,700 --> 00:08:33,740
95, top whack.
133
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:35,600
Is it really?
134
00:08:36,679 --> 00:08:37,679
Yeah, it's nice, isn't it?
135
00:08:38,460 --> 00:08:39,460
Handsome.
136
00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:40,960
Bet you wish you had 100.
137
00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:44,320
Too gross.
138
00:08:45,340 --> 00:08:46,340
God, blimey!
139
00:08:47,540 --> 00:08:50,720
Fakes! They are 100 % genuine
reproductions.
140
00:08:51,140 --> 00:08:53,980
Well, you're holding then, aren't you,
son? All you need now is some punter to
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00:08:53,980 --> 00:08:54,980
get rid of them for you.
142
00:08:55,340 --> 00:08:58,320
That is where my friend Jeremy Burnham
-Jones comes in.
143
00:08:59,140 --> 00:09:01,440
What, a geezer from Brighton who's into
pottery and horses?
144
00:09:02,380 --> 00:09:04,780
Context, Terry. That is what life is all
about.
145
00:09:05,060 --> 00:09:06,140
I've been on a blowout to him.
146
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:09,100
He does me a favour, I do him a favour
in return.
147
00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:10,440
Oh, yeah?
148
00:09:10,740 --> 00:09:12,420
And what favour are you doing him?
149
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:18,040
Oh, be fair, Arthur. I mean, credit
where credit's due.
150
00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:20,980
Your average punter is not going to
stand for it.
151
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:25,200
Terry, your average punter is going to
stand what he's told to stand for
152
00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:26,860
your average punter is a mug.
153
00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:29,480
All right, all right, I won't argue with
that.
154
00:09:29,840 --> 00:09:31,400
Your average punter is a mutt.
155
00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,580
But he's not a bleeding lunatic, is he?
156
00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:35,220
How come?
157
00:09:35,460 --> 00:09:40,760
Look, your average punter is not going
to lob out 85 or 90 sods on
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00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:45,840
an antique Staffordshire statue that was
manufactured by a factory full of
159
00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:49,380
Pakistanis round the back of Orient
football ground, are they? Think not.
160
00:09:50,260 --> 00:09:51,260
No, Arthur.
161
00:09:51,940 --> 00:09:52,940
Highbury may be.
162
00:09:53,220 --> 00:09:54,220
Orient, no.
163
00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:58,980
Terry, I'll mark your card of your
average punter for you. He goes into an
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00:09:58,980 --> 00:10:02,180
antique shop, picks up a little piece of
pottery. He's got a sticker on its
165
00:10:02,180 --> 00:10:03,580
bottom saying 350.
166
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:07,360
He is astute enough to know a piece of
rubbish when it's put in front of him.
167
00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:09,640
Vodka and tonic. No, only light ales.
168
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:11,420
Two light ales, then.
169
00:10:12,260 --> 00:10:17,880
If, contrary -wise, the sticker says 90
nicker, he knows enough about the
170
00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:20,880
subject to know a bargain when it's put
in front of him.
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00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:24,420
Hello, hello, hello, says your Mr.
Average Nice Guy Punder.
172
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,960
90 nikka, this can't be rubbish.
173
00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,260
Ipso facto, we got a result, Terry.
174
00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:30,540
£1 .60.
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00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:38,320
288 times 90 is... No, no, no, it's not
all profit, Terry.
176
00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:43,260
They are genuine reproductions.
Pakistani craftsmen are no Pakistani
177
00:10:43,380 --> 00:10:43,919
Oh, yeah.
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00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:45,580
It cost me six quid apiece.
179
00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:49,680
And there's overheads, travelling
exits... Meals. Exactly.
180
00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:54,160
And what little I do come out on top
with. I've got to split down the middle,
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00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:55,220
haven't I?
182
00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,900
And Jeremy Burnham Watson's going to
want a cup of coffee, isn't he?
183
00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:03,320
Sad but true.
184
00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:06,360
But life isn't just material
possessions, Terry.
185
00:11:07,460 --> 00:11:09,220
Do you know what life is really all
about?
186
00:11:10,140 --> 00:11:11,140
Contacts. Right.
187
00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:13,920
Brighton is Mecca for your antique
tourist punter.
188
00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:15,660
Jeremy has friends at court.
189
00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:18,760
What I was thinking, what keeps going
through my mind is...
190
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:23,560
While you're bugging around all these
antique mortars, what am I going to be
191
00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:24,560
doing?
192
00:11:25,740 --> 00:11:27,880
I'm not surprised they turned it in, you
know.
193
00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:30,540
Your theatrical night. Shut up, market
lot.
194
00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:32,040
Turn what in?
195
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:35,380
Commuting. London to Brighton. Brighton
to London.
196
00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:36,640
Regulars, clockwork.
197
00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:38,700
Before it was Elbow.
198
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,000
What was Elbow?
199
00:11:40,460 --> 00:11:41,460
Brighton Bell.
200
00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:43,660
Champagne and kippers.
201
00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:44,960
They all did it.
202
00:11:45,420 --> 00:11:48,760
Johnny Gilgall, Ralphie Richardson,
David Sexton.
203
00:11:49,700 --> 00:11:53,680
Every morning of the week, we had
Pullman cars then.
204
00:11:54,020 --> 00:11:55,560
They had vintage cars and all, didn't
they?
205
00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:57,080
London and Brighton.
206
00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:04,720
I mean, can you see Johnny Gielgud, Sir
Johnny Gielgud, no less, with his light
207
00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:08,140
ale slopping around in his plastic
beaker while he stuffed an individual
208
00:12:08,140 --> 00:12:09,340
pie into his North and South?
209
00:12:09,780 --> 00:12:10,820
Not on anybody.
210
00:12:11,320 --> 00:12:14,360
What, sitting here like this? He
wouldn't stand for it.
211
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:16,740
You know what I keep thinking is...
212
00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:19,000
Why do you need the heavy brigade?
213
00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:21,040
Heavy brigade?
214
00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,400
Yours truly.
215
00:12:22,860 --> 00:12:25,200
Who down there needs leaning on?
216
00:12:26,700 --> 00:12:30,800
Nobody. A little seaside trip for you,
isn't it? Fresh air, all that.
217
00:12:31,180 --> 00:12:32,180
Put money on it?
218
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:33,960
Much as you like, my son.
219
00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,160
You'll find you're on a loser.
220
00:12:55,260 --> 00:12:56,280
Yes, that was great.
221
00:12:56,780 --> 00:13:00,320
He worked well on the bridle over six
furlongs. He'll be there in time for
222
00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:03,440
plumbing. He'll be all right in time for
the race, all right. No fear in that
223
00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:05,020
score. Yes, Governor.
224
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:06,640
Make sure he's done it properly.
225
00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:08,980
Right. I did that right enough.
226
00:13:37,490 --> 00:13:40,890
19th century commemorative Staffordshire
equestrian figure you've got there,
227
00:13:40,910 --> 00:13:43,070
Terry. Birth of Bob or two, I can tell
you that.
228
00:13:43,570 --> 00:13:44,950
Well, more than milk. What?
229
00:13:45,490 --> 00:13:48,830
Your pottery equestrian's a different
class, your pottery poet, isn't he? I
230
00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:51,910
mean, that's really kosher. You're into
the ton and a half club there, I should
231
00:13:51,910 --> 00:13:52,950
say. Really? Yeah.
232
00:13:53,590 --> 00:13:54,730
Rather more than that.
233
00:13:54,990 --> 00:13:57,850
Yes. Hello, Jeremy. How nice to see you
again.
234
00:13:58,830 --> 00:13:59,830
Thank you.
235
00:14:00,650 --> 00:14:02,870
So this is the friend you were telling
me about, Arthur?
236
00:14:03,070 --> 00:14:07,070
Yeah, Terence McCann, the Honourable
Jeremy Burnham Jones.
237
00:14:08,070 --> 00:14:09,210
Nice place to meet you.
238
00:14:09,610 --> 00:14:10,610
Hello, Terence.
239
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:12,490
You're like the archer.
240
00:14:13,230 --> 00:14:14,230
The what?
241
00:14:15,110 --> 00:14:18,850
The Fred Archer, Mr McCann. He rode over
2 ,750 winners.
242
00:14:20,170 --> 00:14:26,130
Six ledgers, five derbies, four Oaks, 2
,000 guineas four times, 1 ,000 guineas
243
00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:27,990
twice. Greatest ever.
244
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:30,400
You haven't heard of him?
245
00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:32,340
No, it's not up my street.
246
00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:35,340
No, no, it's not his strongest subject,
a history of the turf, Jeremy.
247
00:14:35,700 --> 00:14:37,880
Now, that, that's more like it, isn't
it? What?
248
00:14:41,260 --> 00:14:46,140
Martha McGrath, winner of the Brownlow,
Starris Brick and Douglas Cups.
249
00:14:46,340 --> 00:14:49,180
The only dog ever to win the Waterloo
three times.
250
00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:51,500
Hardly the sport of kings.
251
00:14:53,260 --> 00:14:54,720
How about queens, Jeremy?
252
00:14:57,620 --> 00:14:58,620
Royal command.
253
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,780
was presented to Queen Victoria at
court.
254
00:15:02,060 --> 00:15:03,780
He will have his little joke.
255
00:15:04,660 --> 00:15:08,300
And all the same, one hopes that Mr
McCann will prove rather better than
256
00:15:08,300 --> 00:15:09,940
when it comes to earning his keep.
257
00:15:11,100 --> 00:15:12,220
I want a word with you.
258
00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:13,539
Yeah, of course.
259
00:15:13,540 --> 00:15:14,540
Outside.
260
00:15:16,180 --> 00:15:17,180
Don't worry, Jeremy.
261
00:15:17,980 --> 00:15:19,980
Underneath all that, solid gold.
262
00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:21,900
All that glitters, Arthur.
263
00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:23,120
Exactly.
264
00:15:26,210 --> 00:15:29,150
Since when have I been on his payroll?
You know, I was going to tell you,
265
00:15:29,250 --> 00:15:32,250
but I was just waiting for the opportune
moment, you know. Like now?
266
00:15:32,470 --> 00:15:36,830
Yeah, well, look, as I explained to you,
Jeremy is doing me a favour, apropos
267
00:15:36,830 --> 00:15:37,829
the milks, right?
268
00:15:37,830 --> 00:15:42,590
Yeah, all right, yeah. And I, in return,
and by courtesy of you, am doing him a
269
00:15:42,590 --> 00:15:43,590
favour back.
270
00:15:43,790 --> 00:15:47,250
What sort of favour? No, no, don't lose
your bottle. Nothing big, nothing you
271
00:15:47,250 --> 00:15:48,250
haven't handled before.
272
00:15:48,630 --> 00:15:51,770
Sort of, um, watchdogging type of thing,
you know.
273
00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:54,310
What sort of watchdogging?
274
00:15:56,580 --> 00:15:59,520
Well, watch your thing, really. I mean,
to be absolutely clinical.
275
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:05,200
Me? Sleeping there?
276
00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:06,480
Leaving out?
277
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:08,840
Terry! No, no, no, it's not nice, is it?
278
00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:10,500
What do you mean, it's not nice?
279
00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:13,440
Me, keeping down with a bleeding neck.
280
00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:15,700
No, I'm sorry, mate, it's not on.
281
00:16:15,980 --> 00:16:17,600
Terry, this is the countryside.
282
00:16:17,860 --> 00:16:19,200
This is your great outdoors.
283
00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:23,060
Look, you could be sitting behind a desk
in a solo club.
284
00:16:23,689 --> 00:16:25,970
Breathing in all that ciggy smoke and
all that rubbish.
285
00:16:26,810 --> 00:16:30,390
Grappling with legless marauders from
Man United's far -flung legions.
286
00:16:30,790 --> 00:16:31,790
Having aggro.
287
00:16:31,970 --> 00:16:33,230
This is Shangri -La.
288
00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:54,220
No, Alfred, it's not on.
289
00:16:55,380 --> 00:16:55,979
Don't mean.
290
00:16:55,980 --> 00:16:57,560
Even the old pals act as its limit.
291
00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,120
Yeah, but it's only for a few days. Just
put it on.
292
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:01,680
Make sure you don't get knobbled.
293
00:17:01,940 --> 00:17:03,740
I'm not pipping on straw, Finito.
294
00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:06,540
That was good enough for our saviour,
Terry.
295
00:17:06,819 --> 00:17:08,780
But you wouldn't have to be kipping down
on the straw, Patrick.
296
00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:10,119
We've an armchair.
297
00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:11,619
Especially for that specific purpose.
298
00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:14,560
They've got an armchair? Well, that's
terrific, isn't it? I'll tell you what,
299
00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:18,359
Paddy. You get your head down. Go on, be
my guest. You sleep with Pelman. I
300
00:17:18,359 --> 00:17:19,309
mean, Pelman!
301
00:17:19,310 --> 00:17:20,970
What's wrong with Pelmet for a name?
302
00:17:21,349 --> 00:17:25,810
Nothing on a curtain rail. Listen, you,
there is no way I'm going case with
303
00:17:25,810 --> 00:17:27,790
several hundredweight of unprocessed dog
mates.
304
00:17:28,290 --> 00:17:30,590
That is one of the country's foremost
chasers.
305
00:17:30,930 --> 00:17:31,930
No, Arthur.
306
00:17:32,590 --> 00:17:35,150
Well, if you want to, Patrick, there's
always them that will.
307
00:17:35,490 --> 00:17:38,450
Yeah, well, you'd better get hold of
them. Listen, wouldn't it be the first
308
00:17:38,450 --> 00:17:41,030
that a stable after Stuttgart all night
lying down with the racehorse?
309
00:17:41,890 --> 00:17:42,910
A bird? Yeah.
310
00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:45,270
The mind boggles, doesn't it?
311
00:17:45,710 --> 00:17:48,370
I mean, what sort of scruffy scrubber
have you got to get who's going to sleep
312
00:17:48,370 --> 00:17:49,430
with a horse in a stable, eh?
313
00:17:49,770 --> 00:17:50,770
Hello.
314
00:17:51,430 --> 00:17:52,930
I'm Jocelyn Maxwell Saunders.
315
00:17:53,570 --> 00:17:54,970
Oh, I'm Arthur Edward Daly.
316
00:17:55,350 --> 00:17:58,930
Oh, you must be the good Samaritan who's
volunteered to give a watchful eye on
317
00:17:58,930 --> 00:17:59,609
this chap.
318
00:17:59,610 --> 00:18:01,510
Um, well, no, actually.
319
00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:03,710
No, it's, uh, it's me.
320
00:18:04,850 --> 00:18:06,290
Terry McCann. Oh, hello.
321
00:18:06,730 --> 00:18:08,170
It really is awfully kind of you.
322
00:18:09,330 --> 00:18:10,990
Absolutely. Any friend of Arthur?
323
00:18:11,310 --> 00:18:12,770
We're awfully grateful, Pell and I.
324
00:18:13,070 --> 00:18:14,070
Pell's his stable name.
325
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:15,780
I'm riding him next week.
326
00:18:16,420 --> 00:18:17,420
I'm Rita.
327
00:18:17,580 --> 00:18:20,520
I was going to get landed with the job
of spending me nights in there, so
328
00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:21,660
done me a right good favour.
329
00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:23,880
I've given up all hope of getting any
beauty sleep.
330
00:18:25,220 --> 00:18:27,140
Yeah, well, your need is greater.
331
00:18:27,460 --> 00:18:28,279
Any road.
332
00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:31,140
If there's anything I can do for you,
you only have to ask.
333
00:18:31,980 --> 00:18:34,520
No, I'll do my utmost not to be a
bother.
334
00:19:27,670 --> 00:19:28,890
You're a tough you are.
335
00:19:31,870 --> 00:19:33,350
God, dear Lord.
336
00:19:34,670 --> 00:19:36,250
Oh, that's nice, isn't it?
337
00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:58,200
I'd never do that again. I mean, why
couldn't you knock?
338
00:19:58,420 --> 00:20:00,800
I didn't like to knock. I thought you
might have had your head down.
339
00:20:01,180 --> 00:20:02,480
Only it fetched you a cup of cocoa.
340
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:04,720
Oh, Tom.
341
00:20:05,180 --> 00:20:06,180
Do you take sugar?
342
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:07,400
No, no.
343
00:20:07,460 --> 00:20:08,460
Oh, I thought you would.
344
00:20:08,860 --> 00:20:09,920
You look as if you do.
345
00:20:10,860 --> 00:20:12,360
Only you've put three spoonfuls in.
346
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:15,440
Well, I won't stir it, then, eh?
347
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,360
Nothing else you want?
348
00:20:19,580 --> 00:20:20,580
No, no.
349
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:22,220
Oh.
350
00:20:22,420 --> 00:20:23,420
Right.
351
00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:25,080
Well, I'll say goodnight, then, Terry.
352
00:20:28,270 --> 00:20:29,430
Okay. Good night then, Terry.
353
00:21:20,620 --> 00:21:22,220
It could do with a cork up your bum.
354
00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:25,860
Work day today, Rita. As soon as you
can. Let's have them tacked up early.
355
00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:31,440
Morning, Parrish.
356
00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:32,560
Have a nice night.
357
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,200
Perfect.
358
00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:35,800
Oi, Paddy.
359
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:37,279
Yes, Patrick.
360
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,560
I want a wash and a shave.
361
00:21:38,920 --> 00:21:41,620
Well, you're easily taken care of.
There's a standpipe right behind me.
362
00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:43,300
Well, no hot water.
363
00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:44,520
No hot water.
364
00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:45,960
How do you do it, then?
365
00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:47,280
Electric razor.
366
00:21:47,540 --> 00:21:49,340
That's what I've got. Where do you plug
it in?
367
00:21:49,850 --> 00:21:50,850
I didn't plug it in.
368
00:21:51,290 --> 00:21:52,290
Works on a battery.
369
00:21:56,150 --> 00:21:57,150
Morning.
370
00:21:57,210 --> 00:21:58,350
Oh, morning, Josh.
371
00:21:59,050 --> 00:22:00,050
Morning. Morning.
372
00:22:02,790 --> 00:22:04,770
Any chance of a cup of tea or something?
373
00:22:05,110 --> 00:22:08,630
Oh, there was a cup of tea for them that
was up in time for it, but there'll be
374
00:22:08,630 --> 00:22:09,630
nothing there till after the gallops.
375
00:22:10,770 --> 00:22:11,770
What, no breakfast?
376
00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:35,920
Morning, Miltons.
377
00:22:46,940 --> 00:22:47,940
Oh,
378
00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:51,120
my God.
379
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:13,240
It's funny.
380
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,400
What's that?
381
00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:19,600
Well, don't make it obvious, but if you
look to your right, I keep seeing
382
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:21,100
something glint in those trees.
383
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:25,400
Can't see anything?
384
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:29,500
No, you're right, it's gone.
385
00:23:30,340 --> 00:23:31,340
Probably not important.
386
00:23:33,140 --> 00:23:34,140
No, maybe not.
387
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:36,280
Possibly kids from the village fooling
around.
388
00:23:38,140 --> 00:23:39,840
It's a bit early in the day for kids,
isn't it?
389
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,720
Anyway, they're always on the go, aren't
they? Always dodging about.
390
00:23:43,740 --> 00:23:46,540
That's the third time I've seen
something in the same place in the last
391
00:23:46,540 --> 00:23:47,540
minutes.
392
00:23:48,540 --> 00:23:50,080
Do you think someone's trying to novel
Pell?
393
00:23:50,860 --> 00:23:51,860
What do you think?
394
00:23:52,980 --> 00:23:54,540
All things are possible, as the poet
said.
395
00:23:55,100 --> 00:23:55,879
What poet?
396
00:23:55,880 --> 00:23:56,880
Milton?
397
00:23:58,060 --> 00:23:59,720
Don't you think you ought to stroll up
there and take a look?
398
00:24:00,140 --> 00:24:01,140
No, no, no.
399
00:24:01,780 --> 00:24:04,860
No, if he sees me coming, he'll just leg
it somewhere else, won't he? He'll also
400
00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:05,980
know I know where he is.
401
00:24:06,740 --> 00:24:07,740
No.
402
00:24:07,750 --> 00:24:10,930
Always allow the enemy to believe he's
two moves ahead, right?
403
00:24:11,350 --> 00:24:13,330
But always be one move ahead of him.
404
00:24:13,610 --> 00:24:14,610
Who said that?
405
00:24:15,130 --> 00:24:16,130
Certainly not Milton.
406
00:24:17,510 --> 00:24:18,510
Wellington at Waterloo?
407
00:24:18,770 --> 00:24:19,770
No.
408
00:24:20,050 --> 00:24:21,050
Alexander at Elyria?
409
00:24:21,270 --> 00:24:22,270
No.
410
00:24:23,150 --> 00:24:24,150
Jules C. Scott.
411
00:24:25,890 --> 00:24:28,630
John, give me a rub over. Lay him down,
will you?
412
00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:39,000
Hey, I'll give you odds you've never
done a day's work like this before.
413
00:24:39,220 --> 00:24:41,300
Hmm? Being a bodyguard to a Gigi.
414
00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:46,420
Look, I spent a fortnight once before
Christmas being nursemaid to a load of
415
00:24:46,420 --> 00:24:47,420
residents of a topical.
416
00:24:47,500 --> 00:24:48,500
Oh.
417
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,600
They're not very much alike, though, I
wouldn't think.
418
00:24:50,940 --> 00:24:52,620
They're not turkeys and racehorses.
419
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,860
You'd be surprised, you know. Yeah.
420
00:24:55,140 --> 00:24:58,620
I mean, once they've boned and rolled,
you know, sage and onion stuffing, of
421
00:24:58,620 --> 00:25:01,460
course, and lashings of thick brown
gravy, smashing.
422
00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:02,840
Hey, listen.
423
00:25:02,900 --> 00:25:05,080
You're not one of them heathens that
eats horse flesh, are you?
424
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,980
I get it. The joke. Yeah. Roast
racehorse.
425
00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:10,320
That's very good.
426
00:25:13,220 --> 00:25:15,520
Did you hear that? Roast racehorse.
427
00:25:17,380 --> 00:25:18,380
Come on, Diglo.
428
00:25:20,340 --> 00:25:21,340
Oh,
429
00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:23,600
my God. Rita, no. No, Rita.
430
00:25:23,980 --> 00:25:25,540
Get out, Diglo. Get out.
431
00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:34,480
Sorry, Terry.
432
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:39,860
God, you're a terrible man.
433
00:25:46,940 --> 00:25:48,560
Right, what sort of menu do you have?
434
00:25:49,780 --> 00:25:50,780
What day is it?
435
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:53,080
Thursday, isn't it? Oh, it's Thursday
already.
436
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:56,680
Oh, in that case, it'll be, um... Beef
bourguignon.
437
00:25:56,920 --> 00:26:00,800
Eh? Beef bourguignon. Thursday is Joc's
day to put the chef's hat on.
438
00:26:01,660 --> 00:26:03,360
Now, if it was Rita's day, it'd be egg
and chips.
439
00:26:03,940 --> 00:26:05,260
It was egg and chips yesterday, wasn't
it?
440
00:26:05,500 --> 00:26:07,740
Yeah. Yeah, look, I prefer the beef
bourguignon.
441
00:26:08,380 --> 00:26:09,980
You're supposed to like my egg and
chips.
442
00:26:10,380 --> 00:26:13,340
I've nothing against egg and chips in
principle, but you see, beef
443
00:26:13,340 --> 00:26:14,340
got more protein.
444
00:26:15,180 --> 00:26:16,180
Have you got a minute, Langton?
445
00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:18,780
Oh, I'm totally committed to the
Washington upcoming.
446
00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:20,120
Oh, yeah, it looks like it.
447
00:26:20,500 --> 00:26:23,500
Well, if you've finished, Rita, tune the
crowd and give Joss a hand in the tack
448
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:25,040
room. I'm going down to the village.
449
00:26:33,860 --> 00:26:34,860
Here,
450
00:26:35,540 --> 00:26:37,260
Paddy, hands with your arm.
451
00:26:38,860 --> 00:26:40,740
Have you seen this geezer all the time?
452
00:26:41,100 --> 00:26:42,100
Oh, the phantom nobbler?
453
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:44,960
Yeah, I've seen somebody a time or two
up in them woods.
454
00:26:45,580 --> 00:26:46,580
Is that what you think it is?
455
00:26:47,140 --> 00:26:49,020
Somebody trying to nobble the honourable
Gigi?
456
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:51,220
Well, he's hardly word -watching up
there.
457
00:26:51,420 --> 00:26:53,900
I listen to the rumour going around that
someone's trying to get at the horse.
458
00:26:55,060 --> 00:26:57,840
And Jeremy would lose a few bob, right,
if he thought we'd got her?
459
00:26:58,360 --> 00:27:01,020
Yeah, well, he loses his prize money.
Picks 100 quid and thwarts past the
460
00:27:02,300 --> 00:27:03,340
600? Yeah.
461
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,340
Oh, dear, I know. I've seen more in the
pontoon kitty at the Fulham Conservative
462
00:27:06,340 --> 00:27:09,760
Club. Ah, yeah, but the cut glass
decanter goes with it.
463
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:11,400
Really?
464
00:27:11,900 --> 00:27:13,740
Must be hoping to make a killing with
the bookies, then, eh?
465
00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:15,160
No, he won't do that.
466
00:27:15,900 --> 00:27:16,819
Why not?
467
00:27:16,820 --> 00:27:19,600
Well, I think he'll start off as a red
-hot favourite, weigh out odds on. He's
468
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:20,600
not worth a bet.
469
00:27:20,940 --> 00:27:21,940
That much of certainty?
470
00:27:22,220 --> 00:27:23,500
Yeah, sure thing.
471
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,440
All he'll have to do is to turn up a
plummet on the day, and he's as good as
472
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:27,440
past the post.
473
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:28,700
And he'll turn up all right.
474
00:27:29,660 --> 00:27:30,660
Fit as a fiddle.
475
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:32,240
You've got you to see to that.
476
00:27:35,140 --> 00:27:36,140
What's he saying, this one?
477
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:37,200
Hmm?
478
00:27:37,610 --> 00:27:38,810
Oh, it's beef bourguignon.
479
00:27:39,770 --> 00:27:40,770
It's French.
480
00:27:41,270 --> 00:27:42,270
It's horrible.
481
00:27:42,510 --> 00:27:43,510
Huh?
482
00:27:45,930 --> 00:27:49,350
Hey, that's not... That's not beef
bourguignon you've got there, Patrick.
483
00:27:49,350 --> 00:27:50,350
did you get that from?
484
00:27:50,370 --> 00:27:51,370
At the pan over there.
485
00:27:54,110 --> 00:27:55,470
Oh, that explains it.
486
00:27:56,470 --> 00:27:57,269
Explains what?
487
00:27:57,270 --> 00:28:00,410
Well, you see, your beef bourguignon is
in the oven, and what you've got there
488
00:28:00,410 --> 00:28:03,710
is the special diet that I was heating
up for the three -year -old.
489
00:28:05,210 --> 00:28:06,089
Horse food?
490
00:28:06,090 --> 00:28:07,090
Well, what's wrong with that?
491
00:28:08,330 --> 00:28:09,209
He knows food.
492
00:28:09,210 --> 00:28:11,350
Listen, there's nothing wrong with the
food we give the horses. There's nothing
493
00:28:11,350 --> 00:28:12,350
in there you couldn't eat yourself.
494
00:28:12,970 --> 00:28:13,970
You sure of that?
495
00:28:14,110 --> 00:28:15,029
Sure, I'm sure.
496
00:28:15,030 --> 00:28:16,070
I make sure of it myself personally.
497
00:28:16,290 --> 00:28:21,730
It's got oats and it's got bran and
it's... Well, there's just one little
498
00:28:21,730 --> 00:28:23,110
problem that you've got there, Patrick.
499
00:28:24,250 --> 00:28:27,770
What? Well, you see, the three -year
-old was on a diet for constipation and
500
00:28:27,770 --> 00:28:30,890
put some jollop in there to give the
horse the trots.
501
00:28:32,330 --> 00:28:34,930
So if I was here, I'd keep me klimpsoles
on for the rest of the day.
502
00:28:35,530 --> 00:28:36,530
You know what I mean?
503
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:51,280
You can't have out, Terry. If it were
humanly possible, you could. But I have
504
00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:52,420
given my word to Jeremy.
505
00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:56,080
But in his circle, your word is thingy,
isn't it? You know, sacrosanct.
506
00:28:57,220 --> 00:28:58,380
I've eaten horse food.
507
00:28:58,980 --> 00:29:01,920
During the war, we ate all sorts of
things. We ate whales.
508
00:29:02,380 --> 00:29:03,480
Even the odd snook.
509
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:06,600
No, I'm not spending another night
without horse.
510
00:29:07,220 --> 00:29:08,220
It farmed.
511
00:29:08,940 --> 00:29:13,840
We're none of us perfect, Terry. Oh, and
that silly cow, she's after me. Yeah?
512
00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:16,540
Yeah. She only soaked all my clothes,
didn't she?
513
00:29:17,700 --> 00:29:20,600
Really? Oh, well, you seem to be getting
some fringe benefits out of it all,
514
00:29:20,660 --> 00:29:21,660
don't you?
515
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,060
I'm not certain I haven't got a little
visitor, either.
516
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:28,160
If you've got fleas, you haven't got
them from the horse.
517
00:29:28,420 --> 00:29:29,900
And don't go giving them to the horse.
518
00:29:30,320 --> 00:29:31,840
Or questions will be asked in the house.
519
00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:35,320
You think you've got problems. You
should be where I am.
520
00:29:35,940 --> 00:29:40,160
I am where you are. Not of this
immediate moment, you nurk. I mean, in a
521
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:43,180
seat, wearing out shoe leather, trying
to knock out milts.
522
00:29:44,650 --> 00:29:48,390
Now, if I'd been asked to keep in a
proper stable with a derby runner or
523
00:29:48,390 --> 00:29:52,010
something, Plumwick Pelmet would leave
me out.
524
00:29:53,130 --> 00:29:54,610
Milton? Brighton?
525
00:29:54,870 --> 00:29:57,790
I thought they'd have gone a bomb with
you Yankee tourist punters.
526
00:29:58,250 --> 00:29:59,790
But they're all into royalty.
527
00:30:00,910 --> 00:30:03,210
Got no literary heritage they can call
their own.
528
00:30:04,710 --> 00:30:06,970
All they want is pottery kings and
queens.
529
00:30:09,150 --> 00:30:10,410
She's a pigeon fancier.
530
00:30:12,090 --> 00:30:13,090
What?
531
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:14,499
The Queen.
532
00:30:14,500 --> 00:30:15,600
The pigeon fancier.
533
00:30:16,340 --> 00:30:17,520
Hard to believe, really, isn't it?
534
00:30:17,740 --> 00:30:21,260
No, I used to win a few fags with that
in the scrubs. Used to carry around a
535
00:30:21,260 --> 00:30:22,540
clipping from titbits.
536
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:26,520
What have pigeons got to do with it? I'm
talking about American literature
537
00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:28,320
before your present 20th century.
538
00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:30,480
Mark Twain.
539
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:32,820
Moby Dick bloke.
540
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:34,140
Uncle Tom's cabin.
541
00:30:35,180 --> 00:30:38,180
And what's that one about the red Indian
with his short back and thighs? What's
542
00:30:38,180 --> 00:30:39,180
his name?
543
00:30:39,500 --> 00:30:41,780
Geronimo? No, no, no, no, no, no.
544
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:43,440
All guys up, though.
545
00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:46,800
Last of the... Mohegans.
546
00:30:48,500 --> 00:30:50,440
Oh, she's got class.
547
00:30:51,740 --> 00:30:52,900
Yeah, she has as it happens.
548
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:55,980
Really? You should see her at the
gallops.
549
00:30:56,580 --> 00:30:59,800
Firm young thighs clasped against the
horse's flanks.
550
00:31:00,260 --> 00:31:01,260
Holding it back.
551
00:31:03,340 --> 00:31:05,280
Didn't get that bit of purple prose, did
you?
552
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:09,460
You haven't been given it one, have you?
553
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:16,140
Nah, all I get from her is double
blanks. It's that other silly moo I'm
554
00:31:16,140 --> 00:31:18,620
off, trying to buy my body with mugs of
cocoa.
555
00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:21,360
You could travel further and fare worse,
Terry.
556
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:25,980
Well, she must have better manners in
the kit than your four -legged friend.
557
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:27,700
I'll leave it out after.
558
00:31:29,620 --> 00:31:32,620
That'll be one for your memoirs, Terry.
You'll get a result there.
559
00:31:34,980 --> 00:31:36,060
Oh, well, breath on.
560
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:39,060
I might have recourse to going back to
town.
561
00:31:39,700 --> 00:31:41,500
England? Yeah, London, yeah.
562
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,020
I've been considering the feasibility.
563
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,940
I mean, the milk's not doing the hot
cake back down here. I might just as
564
00:31:45,940 --> 00:31:47,120
chase my contacts up west.
565
00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:49,340
Well, it suits me. I've had a belly full
of this.
566
00:31:49,620 --> 00:31:50,620
Oh, no, no, not you.
567
00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:53,740
I have given Jeremy my word that you
will see this job through.
568
00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:55,700
And I am a man of my word.
569
00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:57,620
And you are a man of my word, too.
570
00:31:58,240 --> 00:31:59,280
Anyway, I'll keep in touch.
571
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:00,480
Oh, she wants you.
572
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:38,160
I'll be the Cocoa Queen.
573
00:33:24,770 --> 00:33:26,190
Grab that finger, sir.
574
00:33:28,530 --> 00:33:29,730
Get the other bucket out.
575
00:33:29,990 --> 00:33:31,110
Clear the table first.
576
00:33:31,470 --> 00:33:32,470
Move it.
577
00:33:40,410 --> 00:33:41,410
What the hell happened?
578
00:33:41,710 --> 00:33:42,710
Got a visitor.
579
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,400
He had a gun. You've got to look at him.
Do you reckon that's a lunatic?
580
00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:47,260
No. Oh, no. Next time.
581
00:34:23,210 --> 00:34:24,210
Enjoy the race, Patrick.
582
00:34:25,130 --> 00:34:27,610
You know, darling, somebody has to mind
the shop.
583
00:34:29,310 --> 00:34:30,310
Anyway,
584
00:34:30,610 --> 00:34:31,889
I'm not missing much.
585
00:34:33,969 --> 00:34:34,969
Hey, I'll tell you something.
586
00:34:35,409 --> 00:34:36,409
She leads from the start.
587
00:34:36,610 --> 00:34:38,630
And all the rest of them will be the
back of her bum.
588
00:34:40,489 --> 00:34:41,489
If I can.
589
00:34:41,610 --> 00:34:45,050
Yeah, well, tell her I'll find her,
mate. I'll see you. God bless, Patrick.
590
00:34:45,810 --> 00:34:48,310
Hey, keep taking the horse tablets.
591
00:34:52,070 --> 00:34:53,008
Come on.
592
00:34:53,009 --> 00:34:54,009
Ten o 'clock already.
593
00:34:54,130 --> 00:34:56,670
I want to get in there and settle down a
couple of hours before they are.
594
00:35:12,830 --> 00:35:14,690
Let him down just before you see the
steward.
595
00:35:15,090 --> 00:35:16,510
Where the hell's Rita got to?
596
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:34,360
Drop the time on you, Terry.
597
00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:36,080
Yes, thanks.
598
00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:38,540
Would you mind telling me? I've got a
watch, but I haven't got it on.
599
00:35:39,300 --> 00:35:40,300
Just gone 12.
600
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:41,800
It's at the mender's.
601
00:35:42,620 --> 00:35:43,620
Getting mended.
602
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:46,420
You on your own? You waiting for
somebody?
603
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:47,880
Yeah, something like that.
604
00:35:48,340 --> 00:35:49,400
Haven't you got things to do?
605
00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,620
Jock will peer into the stable. She
doesn't run until the 2 .15.
606
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:54,820
Only if you are on your own.
607
00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:56,400
I'm on my own.
608
00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:59,140
So I'll wait for the gates to open. You
could buy me a drink.
609
00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:02,520
Or on the other hand, I could buy you a
drink.
610
00:36:10,020 --> 00:36:12,600
Sorry, Reek. Got to see a man about
horse. See you later.
611
00:36:13,240 --> 00:36:14,240
Be lucky.
612
00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:22,160
Never another job like that one.
613
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:23,480
Hello, young lover.
614
00:36:23,780 --> 00:36:25,060
Not playing Goodsbury, am I?
615
00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:26,440
Open the boot.
616
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:28,760
Look at that.
617
00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:30,680
Oh, that's a bit tawdry, isn't it?
618
00:36:31,700 --> 00:36:33,100
Stone me, that's it. Pardon?
619
00:36:34,140 --> 00:36:35,560
Geezer who tried to bonfire me.
620
00:37:13,720 --> 00:37:15,120
One,
621
00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:18,280
two, three.
622
00:37:52,430 --> 00:37:56,630
you dare, and I'll do more than say of
something. I'll have you put away again,
623
00:37:56,770 --> 00:37:57,609
my lad.
624
00:37:57,610 --> 00:37:58,610
Hold thy tongue, woman!
625
00:37:59,030 --> 00:38:03,210
Thou art shapen in wickedness, and in
sin hath thy mother conceived thee.
626
00:38:03,450 --> 00:38:04,450
Build off!
627
00:38:07,790 --> 00:38:08,970
Is that a friend of yours?
628
00:38:09,210 --> 00:38:10,430
He's no friend of mine.
629
00:38:10,670 --> 00:38:11,770
You're on a bleeding quick.
630
00:38:12,010 --> 00:38:15,630
I know. I must have been off mine when I
married that dast dozy sod.
631
00:38:16,310 --> 00:38:17,930
Generation of vipers!
632
00:38:19,930 --> 00:38:23,900
Who are you? I warn thee from the wrath
to come. Shut your gob.
633
00:38:24,620 --> 00:38:26,020
Can't you leave me alone?
634
00:38:26,420 --> 00:38:31,720
Can't you let me live my life? I
wouldn't care. I've been separated from
635
00:38:31,720 --> 00:38:33,620
years. We've been divorced ten months.
636
00:38:34,020 --> 00:38:38,820
I knew it was you. I knew all along. And
you tried to give me some.
637
00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:41,440
I've got a quarter older on him from a
lesson.
638
00:38:41,740 --> 00:38:45,160
You know you'll suffer for it in the
long run. Why carry...
639
00:38:50,830 --> 00:38:51,930
and the bloody end.
640
00:38:52,170 --> 00:38:58,030
He follows me round the country and a
right good living job at a riding
641
00:38:58,030 --> 00:39:02,370
near Eddon Bridge run by a married
gentleman with a son at university.
642
00:39:02,690 --> 00:39:03,810
A Rotarian.
643
00:39:23,530 --> 00:39:27,930
morning when a couple of religious
maniacs kept him talking on the door.
644
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:16,560
Well, as the man said, it takes all
sorts. Very astutely put, my son.
645
00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,340
But if we're going to stand here
philosophising all afternoon, we're not
646
00:40:19,340 --> 00:40:20,940
to earn our wages, are we? Come on.
647
00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:24,040
Number
648
00:40:24,040 --> 00:40:32,800
three,
649
00:40:38,380 --> 00:40:39,380
permit,
650
00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:42,060
Miss Maxwell Saunders.
651
00:40:42,860 --> 00:40:44,160
Grey and gold.
652
00:40:44,940 --> 00:40:46,180
Any extras to declare?
653
00:40:46,420 --> 00:40:47,319
No extras.
654
00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:48,320
Allowance, three pounds.
655
00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:51,440
Daming, three pounds.
656
00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:56,260
And it's just... Go and get a cup of
tea.
657
00:40:57,840 --> 00:40:58,840
Next!
658
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:42,839
No, my son, one ton.
659
00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:44,200
Put yourself about, see what you can
get.
660
00:41:44,700 --> 00:41:45,598
A hundred?
661
00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:46,600
Yeah.
662
00:41:46,640 --> 00:41:49,220
It's going to be no price, is it? It's
bound to be odds on.
663
00:41:49,520 --> 00:41:50,840
Mac will catch a sprat then, innit?
664
00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:54,260
Look, I have it from the horse's mouth.
It's the biggest certainty since the
665
00:41:54,260 --> 00:41:56,820
tortoise walloped the air. And catching
a sprat's better than bugger all.
666
00:41:58,460 --> 00:41:59,460
Oh, go on, chill out.
667
00:42:00,600 --> 00:42:01,880
What's your last servant dial?
668
00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:03,960
Enlarged arteries.
669
00:42:07,700 --> 00:42:08,700
Excuse me.
670
00:42:21,350 --> 00:42:26,230
Here we go. Yes, sunshine.
671
00:42:27,390 --> 00:42:28,910
£120. £120.
672
00:42:29,690 --> 00:42:31,050
£734. £734.
673
00:43:00,950 --> 00:43:01,950
There you go.
674
00:43:02,130 --> 00:43:03,130
Five to one on.
675
00:43:03,610 --> 00:43:04,630
Five to one on?
676
00:43:05,090 --> 00:43:07,550
A hundred nigger to twenty. Is that the
best you could get? Yes.
677
00:43:08,270 --> 00:43:09,249
Do it yourself?
678
00:43:09,250 --> 00:43:10,790
Nah. Never do odds -on shots.
679
00:43:11,430 --> 00:43:14,310
So I walk away with twenty quid. That
can't be bad. Minus tax.
680
00:43:15,190 --> 00:43:16,190
No,
681
00:43:16,830 --> 00:43:17,830
I never have done odds -ons.
682
00:43:18,710 --> 00:43:21,070
In any case... They'll soon be calling
the line.
683
00:43:22,090 --> 00:43:23,290
In any case what, Tony?
684
00:43:43,060 --> 00:43:44,060
What, Terry?
685
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:50,220
If coma is such a good thing, how come I
saw your oppo, Jeremy, putting all his
686
00:43:50,220 --> 00:43:52,340
dough on the second favourite, Linda's
lunch?
687
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:55,960
Linda's lunch? Yeah, six to one, not a
bad price, that, is it?
688
00:44:23,240 --> 00:44:24,238
He needed his rider.
689
00:44:24,240 --> 00:44:25,240
She got off.
690
00:44:25,980 --> 00:44:26,980
Come on, Linda.
691
00:44:27,280 --> 00:44:28,400
Come on, my beauty.
692
00:44:28,620 --> 00:44:29,620
What you on about?
693
00:44:31,860 --> 00:44:33,280
Go on, my son. Kick her on.
694
00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:42,140
I never fancied that pelmet
695
00:44:42,140 --> 00:44:45,660
anyway. Even before I saw this warm
chick putting all his loot on a second
696
00:44:45,660 --> 00:44:47,180
favourite. Just never fancied it.
697
00:44:47,420 --> 00:44:48,420
Why not?
698
00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:50,440
Feeling in me, Walter.
699
00:44:51,040 --> 00:44:52,200
You might have told me.
700
00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:53,319
What for?
701
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:54,440
Wouldn't have done any good, would it?
702
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:55,680
You're Walsh's name, aren't you?
703
00:44:56,420 --> 00:44:57,420
Implacable.
704
00:44:59,980 --> 00:45:00,980
Here's another thing.
705
00:45:01,420 --> 00:45:02,420
What?
706
00:45:02,500 --> 00:45:05,580
All that stuff you were giving me before
the off about it being the greatest
707
00:45:05,580 --> 00:45:08,420
racing certainty since the talk was well
up the air. What about it?
708
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:10,840
Historically inaccurate, innit?
709
00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:14,480
Before the start of that race, the air
was our Tom favourite, wasn't it?
710
00:45:16,060 --> 00:45:18,880
Amazing. Who do you think you are?
Bleeding Eshop?
711
00:45:19,340 --> 00:45:20,360
Oh, dear.
712
00:45:25,299 --> 00:45:26,420
Jeremy, you bastard.
713
00:45:26,780 --> 00:45:28,120
You had that race rigged.
714
00:45:28,620 --> 00:45:29,900
Wow, sir, as if I would.
715
00:45:31,240 --> 00:45:33,240
Justin's foot slipped out of the iron,
that's all.
716
00:45:33,500 --> 00:45:35,780
Leave it out. She took a dive. I had her
in me bins.
717
00:45:36,020 --> 00:45:38,680
You might have robed me in. You did owe
me a favour. I lent you Terry.
718
00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:40,100
Oh, I would have helped you.
719
00:45:40,340 --> 00:45:43,400
But one has to be discreet if one wants
to keep the odds out on the second
720
00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:44,400
favourite.
721
00:45:44,660 --> 00:45:46,200
How'd you get that bird to sling it, eh?
722
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:47,420
Break her arm or something?
723
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:49,200
Hello, darling.
724
00:45:54,290 --> 00:45:55,710
Dear, oh, dear, Terry.
725
00:45:56,230 --> 00:45:57,490
What is it all about, eh?
726
00:45:58,410 --> 00:45:59,410
Contact, isn't it?
727
00:46:02,210 --> 00:46:04,250
Sorry I couldn't help you push the
Miltons, Arthur.
728
00:46:04,930 --> 00:46:07,070
Give us a ring if ever I can give you
any help again.
729
00:46:08,190 --> 00:46:09,190
No, no, no, Terry.
730
00:46:10,050 --> 00:46:11,050
Yeah, go on.
731
00:46:11,250 --> 00:46:12,250
There's a copper.
732
00:46:16,670 --> 00:46:19,270
No, I never had her card marked as being
dodgy, I must say.
733
00:46:19,770 --> 00:46:20,589
And it?
734
00:46:20,590 --> 00:46:21,870
Well, he was definitely bent.
735
00:46:22,110 --> 00:46:23,110
He was bent.
736
00:46:23,790 --> 00:46:24,769
Oh, yeah.
737
00:46:24,770 --> 00:46:25,770
Been crooked.
738
00:46:25,970 --> 00:46:29,510
I thought we'd spent peculiar, you know.
We didn't study the form, Terry, did
739
00:46:29,510 --> 00:46:32,690
we? Ah, and your favourite finished well
down the field, didn't he?
740
00:46:33,590 --> 00:46:35,130
What don't a field be lost?
741
00:46:35,690 --> 00:46:36,910
All is not lost.
742
00:46:37,150 --> 00:46:43,130
The unconquerable will, the study of
revenge, er, et cetera, et cetera.
743
00:46:43,910 --> 00:46:44,910
Milton?
744
00:46:45,130 --> 00:46:46,130
The lad himself.
745
00:46:46,990 --> 00:46:49,790
Null desperandum, that's what I think
he's trying to tell us, Terry. Cop that.
746
00:46:51,930 --> 00:46:52,930
It's a paintbrush.
747
00:46:53,160 --> 00:46:54,240
That is your starter for ten.
748
00:46:54,720 --> 00:46:57,780
This is a pot of blue paint, this is a
pot of white paint. I want them all
749
00:46:57,780 --> 00:47:01,080
painted. Blue shirts, blue breeches,
white socks, nice pair of boots.
750
00:47:02,380 --> 00:47:03,380
Do what?
751
00:47:04,140 --> 00:47:06,120
I have another contact in commemorative
pottery.
752
00:47:06,640 --> 00:47:07,640
No, no, no, be honest.
753
00:47:07,860 --> 00:47:10,780
I've got a mate who's got a souvenir
shop not far from Stamford Bridge.
754
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:14,240
I'll stand a loss, but you'll knock him
out for me as Chelsea footballers.
755
00:47:17,440 --> 00:47:18,440
Let him fit out.
756
00:47:19,300 --> 00:47:21,660
He can't do that, he's a famous antique
poet.
757
00:47:22,240 --> 00:47:23,240
He's got a book in his hand.
758
00:47:24,720 --> 00:47:25,880
F .A. handbook, isn't it?
759
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:27,280
He's wearing a cloak.
760
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:29,500
Oh, paint it. Stick a number on the
back.
761
00:47:29,780 --> 00:47:32,240
Don't argue with me, Terry. Exercise
your artistic talent.
762
00:47:32,820 --> 00:47:33,820
Here.
763
00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:35,360
You have the blue.
764
00:47:38,820 --> 00:47:39,880
Here's another one for you.
765
00:47:40,600 --> 00:47:43,100
I live in Gaza at a mill with slaves.
766
00:47:43,660 --> 00:47:44,660
Samson Agonistes.
767
00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:49,200
I've got one for you.
768
00:47:49,600 --> 00:47:50,600
Oh?
769
00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:54,680
When the ball hit the back of the net, I
was over the moon, Brian.
770
00:47:56,040 --> 00:47:57,040
Kevin Keegan.
771
00:47:59,400 --> 00:48:01,700
I think you're an inside forward, my
son.
772
00:48:28,720 --> 00:48:32,800
Right people, right time, just the wrong
location.
773
00:48:36,660 --> 00:48:38,960
I've got a good idea.
774
00:48:40,720 --> 00:48:47,120
Just you keep me near. I'll be so good
for you. I could be so good for you.
775
00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:51,220
I'm going to help you. Love you like you
want me to.
776
00:48:58,060 --> 00:48:59,060
Peace out.
58505
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