All language subtitles for Minder s07e05 The Last Video Show

Looking like you're walking through.

What is it?

All right, open her up.

Don't you bloody dare.

If you want to talk to me, Freddy, all
you've got to do is pick up the phone.

Get in the car, Jack.

No, Barry, I am not satisfied.

I'm a long way from satisfied.

In fact, I have the serious ump with
you. There you go. You're cutting

vampires from the grave times four.

What am I talking about, Barry? I'm
talking about these T -shirts.

500 of the bloody things.

No, no, no, no. I've no quibble with the
garments, per se.

They've all got sleeves and always in
the right places. It's a spelling.

Barry, to my certain knowledge,
Hollywood is not the movie capital of

It's somewhere in the Essex marshes.

Oh, watcher. It's Arnie.

Where did you get all this?

Big house up at St John's Wood. Geezer's
got in the place.

Do you know, too, it never ceases to
amaze me that people just don't realise

what they're flying away, do they?

I bet they don't know.

About time, too.

I'll see if Nigel's on his way. Have a
look at these lions. They're

these lions.

Sensational lions?

Yeah. Oh, dear, look at that.

What? It depends, Arnie. It depends.

Yeah, it depends what Nigel says,
doesn't it? Hello, am I talking to

Oh, splendid.

Good morning to you, too. Good morning
to you, too.

Have you ever seen anybody bow on a
phone?

Nigel, where exactly are you?

I can't hear.

There's a lot of noise, Nigel.

Hello?

Can you hear me?

Hi, Nigel. Hi.

Wait. Oh, hi, Nigel.

Infectible timing. The items in question
have just arrived. So I see.

Get those gates measured up, will you,
Martin?

God, look at those lions.

Yes, one is a little bit foxed round the
arse here.

It's not the only one, is it, either?

There he is.

Oh, no, I think they're terribly witty.

Witty?

No, Arthur said that. He said, my word,
what witty little lions, he said. Didn't

you, mate?

Shut up.

Yes, I'll have them. I'm very fond of
putting things like that indoors.

On your mantelpiece?

Something like that, yes.

What? What, Martin?

Right, Arthur, I'll have the gates, the
fireplace and the lions.

I'm afraid that those urns are not for
me at all, though.

Those urns are sensational.

Sensational? No.

No, I don't know. They're somehow deeply
naff.

Naff?

You heard what the man said. Those are
naff urns.

Now, help Mr Miller's man load this
stuff onto his van.

Nigel, word inside.

Certainly, Arthur.

I'll see you later down the Winchester,
all right?

I do acquiesce with you about the urns,
Nigel, but you're quite happy about the

rest of the gear? Fabulous stuff,
Arthur. Oh, fabulous. I'm such a

Look, if anything else comes up that you
want, just give me a bell. You never

know what's going to turn up. Someone
might leave the whole house on a skip.

Sorry, Tony, not with you.

Terry. The name is Terry. Terry, Terry,
don't interrupt when money is changing

hands. Why don't you come down to the
site this afternoon, Arthur? Have a look

round. Something I'd like to discuss
with you. That is, if Terry here doesn't

object. Oh, no, I'd be delighted, Nigel.
Any news about my premises?

Nothing definite. I've had a word with
the managing agents. The thing is, these

people are killing to get into these
retail units. They would, they would. I

can't wait to get my foot in the door of
a free enterprise zone.

Hang in there, Arthur. I'm working on
it. I'll see you this afternoon.

Oh, hang about, hang about.

Complementary T -shirt.

My compliments.

Fabulous.

See you, Nigel.

What is the matter with you, winding
young Nigel up like that?

He's a wrong and a new know -it.

He's one of those greedy sods who loves
doing a deal but don't want to get their

hands dirty.

And if you think that architect Nigel is
going to set you up in a video shop in

his new complex, you're wrong.

All he's doing is stringing you along so
you keep knocking out that hooky gear

to him. He is not stringing me along and
it is not hooky gear.

One man's junk is another man's object
dark.

Here. Your prejudice against Nigel
because he's done well for himself.

He's the sort of bloke that's putting
his country back on its feet.

She'd understand.

Come to think of it, Nigel looks a bit
like her, doesn't he? Don't be

disrespectful. Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot
you fancy her, don't you? I do not.

Now, get a move on.

You do. You said today... I said it was
a meeting of minds.

Though I do have to admit she...

She does have womanly qualities.

You're disgusting.

Now relax.

There is no point getting wound up in
these kinds of

situations.

Look at that.

The TV generation.

One brain cell ticking over.

What's your trace?

Morning, my dear. Just popped in to pick
up the takings.

There's four more kung fu vampires.

Put them out blue label, 150 a go.

Hey, what are you doing?

Sorry, Arthur. I'm off.

You're what?

I'm sick of it, Arthur.

You give me 20 quid here and a tenner
there. I mean, a ten hours a day for

people complaining about your poxy
videos.

Now, Tracy, be fair. I only do copies of
filth.

If the punters want art, they get kosher
tapes.

If they want filth, they can squint.

Will you listen?

I've got a job in a wine bar and I start
today.

Some kids will give their right arm for
this position.

Wait. Watch her lips.

She's got another job.

Very nice.

Free water, eh?

I'm afraid it'll take a bit more than
that this time, Jack.

Tell me more.

Well, the thing is that we can put you
outside a factory in Tottenham, let me

see, February 12th last year. Yes, we
can put you on the pavement outside the

factory with a mask on your face and a
shooter in your mid.

I've never heard anything so silly in
all my life.

I agree.

This filthy grass has put you there.

I don't mean to argue.

But what?

The thing is, Jack, you've had a good
run.

We've had a good run.

The thing's getting a bit iffy on my
side, and I've got to make a bit of a

splash. I mean, there are rumours going
around that you and I are good friends.

You like to get one of these new video
cameras, Freddie?

I can't say I don't have a camera.

Brilliant, now.

My pal Charlie, right?

Never taken a photograph, even. He can
pick one up, press a button, bingo.

Play it back on the telly.

Could be the news at ten.

Brilliant.

So? Well, remember last year when I
rented that villa in Spain and you come

for, what was it, liaison?

with the local law.

And you came by the villa for a drink at
the pool.

Vaguely, Jack, vaguely.

Yeah. Well, remember those two riches
that came over? Remember the one with

big... Well, Charlie was inside messing
around with the video camera.

Well, Freddie, a bit saucy.

I mean, you and the one with the chest
were getting, well, a bit saucy.

You invest in you, and what do they do?

And yesterday, Arthur.

Spit in your face.

Good morning.

I'm disappointed in you, Tracy.

A wine bar. Where is it?

Transylvania? Oh, bloody hell.

I'd like to return these.

Well, don't give them to me. I don't
work here anymore, thank God.

There's gratitude for you. See you,
Terry.

Yeah, good luck, love. And don't let the
old fart grind you down.

Would somebody please take these tapes?
Yes, give them to my assistant, will

you? He's temporarily in charge.

No, no, I'm sorry. No, it's nothing to
do with me.

Oh, by the way, I'm Arthur Daly.

It's not often I get the chance to meet
our members.

Listen, you, I'm not working here. Look,
I am in a hurry, actually.

Oh, don't leave empty -handed.

We have the new Jack Nicholson.

Any news, Charlie?

Yeah, that was Jack.

What'd I tell you?

They're letting him go.

I really thought they had him this time.

Nah, not Jack.

He's got the gift he has.

I'm not working here.

Terry, please.

No, no. One day.

The punters will go elsewhere if I close
down.

They won't bring the tapes back, please.

Just for me.

Just one day? One day.

All right, then. Terry, you are
beautiful.

On one condition.

Any condition.

A tonne in the hand now. You must be
mad.

Yeah, and I was beautiful just now. A
tonne in the hand. All right. The shop

stays closed, all right?

As I was telling Detective Constable
Mellish, I've recently had a

amount of renovation done on my house.
Yes, sir. If you'd done mine, Mr

Sinclair, my colleague, would tell me
all the details.

That's what I haven't told you about. If
you would just concentrate on the

photographs, would you, sir, please?

Yes.

Right. The builder leaves all this
rubbish in our friend's front garden.

Our friend hired some cowboy by the name
of John to get rid of it.

Our friend says, quote, when I get back
this evening, I don't want to see so

much as a brick.

And? Well, this John does a good job.
Our friend doesn't see so much as a

He also doesn't see his raw iron gates,
his bronze dolphin door knocker, and his

lines.

His what?

Lines, Gus.

The kind that sits on the gatepost.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, of course. Silly me.

Well, no, just get a statement off him
and get shot at him, will you?

I've got more important things to do
than worry about a bloke who can't hang

to his bloody gates. Yeah, but the thing
is, Gus, I think I see a pattern

emerging. Oh, really? Yeah, I mean, look
at what's been reported stolen over the

past two weeks.

Three farm places, 30 -foot vote
banners, borrowed staircase, two front

ornament fountain.

It's a right little crime wave, isn't
it?

I wonder if the Mafia are rebuilding
their London headquarters.

That's the man.

That's him.

I'd swear.

Suddenly I'm interested.

I'm sorry, mate, but these should have
been in two days ago.

Look, I told you, me mother was rushed
into hospital the night before last. The

wife's working nights, so I'm left with
the kids, right?

Hold on, you just said your dad was in
hospital.

He is. He's been in for months, but now
me mum's in.

The health of my entire family is up to
spout, and I'm supposed to remember your

bloody videos.

Oh, God, all right.

You people. All you think about is lying
in your own pockets.

I said all right, didn't I? I'm letting
you go.

Yeah, right and all. I shan't be coming
in here again.

Bloody marvellous, innit, eh? My mum's
on the critical list and he's trying to

nick a quid off me.

Ah, excuse me.

Oh, yeah.

Have you got your membership card? Yeah.

Excuse me, can I ask you something?

Have you got Stormtroopers in
suspenders?

Well, we do have it, yeah, but if it's
not on the shelves, it's not in. Ah, no,

excuse me, because apparently it is due
in this morning.

Yeah, well, some did come in earlier.
Hold on, will you?

This is yours.

Some of these, eh?

Oh, there you go. Bingo.

Stormtroopers in suspenders.

Right.

Now, that'll be six quid.

Including the charges for fumigation, of
course.

Don't mind my saying.

You've got a very funny attitude to
somebody who should be serving the

If you don't mind my saying, I'm being
extremely nice at the moment.

Jack, I just want to know what happened.

They look in here, did they? What?

Yes, they did.

And I've got a bone to pick with you,
Jack, last.

They pulled out this porn video. I
didn't know where to look.

Oh, now, my darling, this is not a porn
video.

This is an epic masterpiece.

Confessions of a Copper.

Starring Inspector Freddie Dyer.

Wait a minute.

What's this, Ordinary People?

Ordinary People?

Jack, what is going on?

Sandra, where is the video that was in
this case?

I don't know. The old bill was chucking
them all over the place.

If they're not here, God help me.

God help me.

Maybe it... What?

Well, it's just that I took some rented
videos back this morning. I mean, I

might just possibly have put the wrong
tape back in the wrong box.

I do not believe what I'm hearing.

Are you trying to tell me that you were
stupid enough to... Well, how was I

supposed to know?

How am I supposed to know that some
bloody porn video is important?

You never tell me anything.

All right. All right.

Just tell me where you got the videos
from.

The usual place.

Next door to the shop.

Daily, the video.

Hello, Martin. Good afternoon, Mr. Daly.
He's in there.

All right, go on.

Nigel.

Arthur, hi.

Hi.

Who's that?

That's Daly, the chap I'm getting all
this fabulous stuff from.

Hasn't got a clue.

What about that suit?

A bit of grunge on the old hush puppies.

Never mind, Arthur.

This is my partner, Simon. Simon Arthur
Daly.

I've just been clocking the commercial
premises opposite.

One of them will do very nicely.

Nigel's going to help me get a foot in
the door here.

The premises opposite?

I don't understand.

Yes, I, um...

Said I put in a word for Arthur here.
What was it, Arthur? A video shop.

Yeah, well, I see. I mean, this is all
going to be wall -to -wall media folk

city types around here, isn't it? And
let's face it, they like their leisure.

Crack a bottle of Bollinger, stick the
feet up, bung the old video on. Lovely.

Well, I can see you've done your
research, Arthur.

Well, I think you can say I've got my
finger on the pulse, Nigel.

Well, in that case, perhaps you know
something about these things here.

A music centre?

Well, I'm very into using these stoves
at the moment. Oh, it's a cooker.

Particularly second -hand. You know,
with that slightly distressed, knocked

-about look.

You know what I mean? I just thought I'd
mention it.

I think I'll get your gist, Nigel.

Good man.

Raise the arms up, would you, Jack?

Oh, are you kidding? I don't need to be.
Why do I?

I've got all I need in glorious
Technicolor. Where is it, then?

Oh, it's somewhere safe. I can't lay my
hands on it at the moment.

You said you could.

I'm funny like that. Sometimes I say
things.

I think you're a sodding liar, Jack.

I think this video is one of your little
fantasies.

So arrest me.

You've got till tomorrow.

Then I will.

Right then.

Hello, Winchester Club?

Put me through to the library, please.

Dave, that's not very nice.

Listen, if Arnie comes in, tell him to
dwell there, will you? I want a word.

Yeah, OK.

Ta -ra.

No, no, it's all right. It's all right.
Don't worry.

Have the last ten minutes on me.

Thanks.

No, I'm sorry. I'm closing.

Oi, I said I'm closing.

Don't mind him.

He's only been helpful.

I've got one of your videos here.

Ordinary people.

Well, where's the box?

Ah, you've already got that.

You see, my old lady made a bit of Le
Mans.

She brought back four videos this
morning, but one of them was mine.

Am I, uh... Am I getting through?

See, I give you this back, then you give
me mine.

What's it called?

Stormtroopers in suspenders. Yeah, we
wouldn't want that to go missing, would

we? Just get it, pal, will you?

Ah.

No, there is one slight problem. It's
out on hire.

Yeah, well, that'll be yours, won't it?

No. No, you see what I mean?

Because you've got two of them now,
right?

And one of them's mine.

Right, Charles, I think I'll hear.

Yeah. Sorry I didn't quite catch that.

Why don't you have a little check
around?

And then...

You can go and have a nice drink. Here,
see?

How much do you earn in this rat hole,
anyway?

Look, there's more.

Loot. Lovely loot. The root of all evil.

Suddenly, it won't be such a bad day
after all, is it?

Good boy, good boy.

This isn't it.

It's a different label.

It's the same film, isn't it?

Just take it, will you, and take your
money as well, and stick it somewhere

intimate. No, no, no.

I'll take two quid of that for the video
that's overdue.

You don't understand.

This is not my video.

No, see, your video is out on hire, so
you can't have it. Am I getting through?

Well, just tell me who you loaned it out
to, and I'll go round and make the swap

myself. Well, I couldn't do that.

A member's address is strictly
confidential.

Do you know who I am?

Do you know who you're talking to?

This is Jack Last, my friend.

That mean anything to you?

I don't care if it's Jack the Ripper.

I'm setting up shop.

Now, if you want your video, come back
tomorrow, eh?

Let me give him a smack.

Just a little one. No, no, no, no, no.

We come back tomorrow and we pick up the
video.

And if there's any problems, you ain't
got a video cop left.

Go on, sling your hook.

You know what I think?

I think the silly sod's gone and lost
it.

Get someone under the local nick.

Find out who owns that video shop.

Bonnie and Clyde.

Why don't we give him a tug, Gav?

Very tempting proposition, Mellish, but
I shall resist it.

What do you mean?

I have got bigger fish to fry.

That is what I mean.

So what are we talking about here then,
Arthur?

Microwaves? No, no, no. Your old
-fashioned kitchen range.

Look.

Like that.

Oh, yeah.

God, Otis, look at the state of that
kitchen.

No, no, no, that is the country kitchen
look.

Country pigsty look, more like. All that
fitted high -tech stuff is well parfait

now.

Well, I think it's an attempt to
recreate the rural past, but more myth

reality.

Pardon?

Well, that's what it says here.

Oh, look, will you be serious?

What I'm trying to tell you is, you find
any old cookers like that, you're on a

tour.

Result?

What, to tell you all right?

No. Right, John?

Um, I think I'll have a large brandy and
American, please.

One of those days, eh? Yeah, you could
say that, yeah.

They're all in here this evening.

The cream de la cream.

Is this for that yuppie twerp, Nigel?
Good evening, gentlemen.

Isn't this charming?

The lads are swapping ideas about
wallpaper.

That happens to belong to her indoors.

She's a regular subscriber.

What about you, Arnie?

You interested in homes and gardens, are
you?

No, I live in a tower block. We don't
have to bother with that sort of thing.

Excuse me.

They're at it.

I can tell.

I can smell it.

Oh, no.

I think that was Arnie, Gav.

He's always covered in deezer, ain't you
noticed?

Did you bring the takings?

No.

What do you mean, no?

I forgot, all right?

No, it's not all right. Look, you
extorted a one -er out of me for minding

shop. I need a cashier too. Just don't
give me any of your eight tonight, all

right? Just not another word.

Look, all I'm saying is... Right, that's
it.

Night, all.

Oi, hold on, where are you going?

Come back.

Terry.

Dave.

You know those old kitchen stoves, you
know, the ones with the doors?

No.

Who is it?

Me.

Go away.

Oh, come on, Terry. What's the matter
with you? Open up.

Come on.

Brought you a drink.

It upsets me when you get the ump.

Yeah, does it? Yeah, it does.

I care.

I'm concerned.

I feel like a father feels towards his
son.

Do what?

His brother.

Also, I still haven't got anyone to run
this shop.

Now, listen, you... Sorry, sorry.

I just thought I'd mention it.

Bloody shop.

That's where it all started.

What? Where what happened?

No, you wouldn't understand.

Terry, how can you say that?

Terry, my ears are yours for bending.

All right, then, look. I was sitting in
the shop today, and who should walk in

but Jack Last.

Jack Last?

Jack Last?

That's what I said, Jack Last, yeah.

He comes in with one of his men, right,
and...

Well, he's given it all that menacing
looks. And he asks about this video.

Now, the thing is, you see, I knew he
was, but he didn't know who I was.

Well, there was a bit of a
misunderstanding, and then he started

annoyed.

What?

But then he gets out his dough and
starts plonking ten -pound notes down on

counter.

And that's when it happened.

What? What happened?

It was a way that he was putting the
money down. I mean...

I could see him looking at me, thinking,
here's some wally who works in a proxy

video shop we've never seen a tenner
before.

And I thought, well, that's it, then, is
it? That's what it's come to.

Then he started making threats, and his
mate was really looking for a ruck,

and... Do you know what I did, Arthur?

You hit him?

No.

I walked away from it.

Do you see what I mean?

It was a very... depressing moment.

Oh! Very depressing moment. I do not
believe this.

Jack Last is making threats in my shop
and you are depressed.

Look, you asked me what was giving me
the ump. I just told you, all right?

Look, will you shut it about your
midlife crisis for a moment and tell me

was he making threats about?

Oh, I don't know. Apparently, one of
your videos got mixed up with one of his

and I loaned his out by mistake, that's
all.

Mind you, he did say that if... if he
didn't have his one back first thing in

the morning, you wouldn't have a video
shop left.

Makes you wonder, though, doesn't it?

No, it does not make me wonder. Well, it
should, Arthur. I mean, why would Jack

Last get all lathered up about some
soppy video?

I wonder how you can be so
irresponsible, upsetting Jack Last.

Terry, I do not want my shop burnt down.

You will get the video and return it
first thing, before the man gets really

nasty.

I'll think about it.

Terry, I beg you.

I said I'll think about it.

Depends on what?

If he asks nicely.

Righty -do.

Arthur Daly.

Who wants to know?

Inspector Dyer.

Serious crime squad.

Like a word with you?

Inside.

Serious crimes?

I've never committed a serious crime in
my life, Inspector.

Or a frivolous one, for that matter.

Right with Aladdin's cave you've got
here.

All legitimate stuff, I can assure you.
I have the paperwork to prove it.

Mr. Rycott can vouch for my legitimacy.

Rycott? Detective Sergeant Rycott from
our ever -friendly police station.

Him and me have a close working
relationship.

both being dedicated to law and order in
the local community.

A busy man, aren't you, Daly?

Yes, yes, that is true.

Then there's the video shop, isn't
there?

Come again? Daly Videos.

That's your business, isn't it?

Oh, yes, yes, that is true. That is my
business, yes.

So you know Jack Last, then, do you?

Jack Last?

Jack Last?

Daly.

What a patient man.

Jack Last has seen in your shop
yesterday.

Yes.

Now, either you stop giving me the
runaround and tell me all about it, or

assume that you're webbed up with him.
In which case, you're in very serious

trouble. Jack Last.

Yes, now you mention it, I do believe he
is a customer. Is that why he's got a

car parked outside your shop at the
moment?

God, what?

Why is that, do you reckon?

Well, I don't have much to do with the
day -to -day running of the shop, but my

manager did tell me there was some
confusion over it.

Believe me, that is the strength of it,
officer.

Stand on me, I've never ever met the
man.

All right, darling.

I'll be in touch.

Be very, very careful, Daly.

You don't seem to be taking this in.

Serious crime squad.

I mean, Rycott's one thing.

He's like a wart. You get used to him.
But these two were not nice, Terry. I

probably think you've been robbing
security vans with Jack last.

Now, if you were to get 20 years...

Even with remission, you'd probably
never see the light of day again, would

How can you joke about such things?
Easy.

Hold on, hold on, that's number eight.

This must be it.

God, look at the state of that.

There's always someone worse off than
you.

And I think he's it.

What do you want?

Hello, do you remember me from the video
shop?

Look, there's been a mix -up with the
tapes.

Yeah, not half there, Adam.

I've got a complaint to make about one
of them tapes.

I'm getting curious about this.

Would you mind if we came in and had a
look at it?

I'll go in there.

20 years old.

Look over there.

Look. It goes out of focus from time to
time.

You have a word there, Faye?

It only lasts for six minutes.

Got Barry Norman here.

Ticket, please.

No, thanks. I mean,

it's rubbish.

That's him!

That's the old Bill who was harassing me
this morning. You know who that is,

don't you? It was that flasket Freddy
Dyer who tried to nick me once when he

a DC.

Oh, look who's turned up.

Jolly Jack Last.

I thought we were going to get good
here.

My God, she's taking off her... Yeah.

But then it goes out of focus, and even
if you freeze frame, you can't see much.

Look at the size of those.

I think that's enough for you.

I mean, very handy.

Come on, let's get out of here.

Hey, what about the refund?

I had a question. You have just been
blackballed from the Arthur Daly Video

Club.

What are we going to do? We're in dead
stock whichever way we go.

Between the devil and the deep blue
what's -it.

And no fault of mine, I might add.

If you hadn't got those tapes mixed up
in the first place, we wouldn't be in

this situation. Now, if you don't stop
moaning, I'm not going to tell you how

get out of this.

What? Al, what do you mean? Look, we go
to the lock -up and we make a copy of

the tape, right?

Yeah. We give the original to Jack Last.

Yeah. And we keep a copy just in case
there's any aggro from Dyer.

Brilliant. Yeah, it's funny, you know. I
was thinking of a little similar...

Just get in the car.

Oh, yes, this could turn out extremely
nicely.

A bit of influence in Scotland Yard will
come in very handy.

Just remember, this is only a last
resort.

I mean, don't expect Freddie Dyke to
start inviting you to play golf with the

commissioner.

Don't worry, I wouldn't use you as my
caddy anyway.

It's them again.

The videos.

Do something.

Now, don't turn them off.

Just close the door.

It's Arnie.

Morning, Arthur.

Have I got a sensational old stove for
you.

Sensational stove?

Well lived in. Come take a look.

You have?

You'd better get it down to site. Nigel
will have a look at it.

Terry, you'll be able to finish this job
on your own, won't you? That's right,

Arthur. You run away.

Well, I think it's better if I'm out of
the way for an hour or so, don't you?

Oh, yeah, yeah. You go and have a nice
time with Nigel.

I'll stay here and save your skin.

I knew you'd understand.

Come on, let's have a look at it. Ta
-ra, Terry.

Thanks very much, Terry.

This could be it.

Hold on.

Daly's getting into his car.

I am not blind, Mellish.

We'll start the bloody car.

That's the second time he's done that.

Don't muck about. Have you got it or
not?

You tell him to turn that sign round,
and I'll tell you.

All right, do it.

Right.

Have you got my video?

You ask me nicely, and I'll tell you.
Let me ask him, Jack.

No, you shut your mouth, because every
time you open it, I feel sick.

All right.

All right.

You're a very hard nut.

I'm very impressed.

May I please have my video?

Because if you have it, I would be very
grateful if you returned it to me. Thank

you very much.

All you had to do was ask.

You got a back way out of here?

Yeah, all right, come on.

I can have him now, can I, Jack? You
might get.

It's a bit of public relations.

Er, we haven't done a left yet, Guv.

Or have we?

Just do it, Meles.

If we don't find them, I'm going to kill
you.

Dead.

You did what, Terry?

Terry, you are a mature adult. You're
not supposed to go around hitting

You'll have to pay for any damage if
there is any.

I'll talk to you later. Nigel's just
arrived.

Hi, Nig.

a lovely piece of lived -in kitchen
furniture.

Oh, fabulous, Arthur. It's got that
terrific, knocked -about look.

I should think so. Should have seen the
way we loaded it.

You think you could use the hoist to get
it up to the fourth floor, Martin?

It'll go nicely in flat nine.

Yeah, we can give it a whirl.

Nigel, could we talk money for a second?
Certainly.

All right.

Take her up a bit.

Now, Nigel, I've done my research here,
and I know these stoves can stand you in

two grand, second hand.

Two grand?

But as it's you, I'm prepared to talk
one and a half.

Seven -fifty?

There they are.

Put your foot down, Mellish.

Wycott!

And you, sunshine.

You can't arrest me. I'm an architect.

There's my port.

Right, cop.

I'm a troglodyte.

It's nothing more than a personal
vendetta against my person. That's

Arthur. And against mine. And mine and
all.

All right, all right. Let's have some
hush.

I am pleased. No.

I am delighted to tell you lot.

that you are in very serious trouble.

Now, wait a minute, Shirley. You don't
mean me.

I mean all of you.

You, Arthur, as the ringleader of this
little band of thieves, are in it

of all.

I hope you're all noting the verbal
harassment that I am being subjected to.

Let's see what we've got here.

Theft, receiving stolen goods,
conspiracy to pervert the course of

Malicious damage to a police vehicle
with a stove cooking for the use of.

I told you, I bought that stove off the
keys of that Arnie.

That's all right, Arnie, we'll see.

There will be other offences to be
considered.

Mellis, go and ring up Mr Sinclair, will
you, and ask him to get up the station

to identify Arnie here.

Right, go.

You remember Mr Sinclair, Arnie?

No, never heard of him.

Never.

Well, perhaps you recall his gates.

And his lovely lions, what's that on
them?

I bought those lions in very good faith
from Mr Daly here.

Thank you very much, Mr Miller, most
useful.

The yuppies are wrongin'. Rycott, I
demand that you

contact Inspector Dyer of the Serious
Crime Squad.

What are you on about, Daly?

Yeah, what are you on about, Arthur?

I insist on speaking to Inspector Dyer
immediately.

I think you'll find he'll cast a very
different light over this miscarriage of

justice.

You can squawk as much as you like,
Daly.

It will get you nowhere at all.

This time, they are going to lock you
up.

Do

you

mean you've got them all down in the
cells?

Yeah. We're just waiting for this bloke
to come in and identify Arnie, then

Maricot's going to charge him.

How's Arthur taking all this?

Thinks he's the bird man of Alcatraz,
doesn't he?

Bye, Sandy.

He started to scratch the days on his
cell wall.

He's only been down there 20 minutes.

We're never going to hear the end of
this, are we?

Keep screaming blue murder about some
inspector from the yard.

Dyer or something.

What's that about? One of Arthur's
fantasies?

Yeah, probably, yeah.

Dyer?

Um, I've got a certain videotape here I
think you might be interested in.

Yeah, that's the one.

Ah, no.

No, before I hand it over, you're going
to have to do me a little favour.

Yes, Inspector, I understand.

I normally wouldn't consider it, but in
view of the circumstances... I

appreciate it.

Of course.

If there's anything I can do in the
future... Don?

Ah, Sergeant MacArthur.

This is Inspector Dyer of Serious Crime.

How do you do?

Oh, hello.

He's come to ask us a favour concerning
one Arthur Daly.

He has?

I believe you have Daly and some others
in custody.

Oh, yes, I have. The thing is that we've
been mounting a lengthy investigation.

I prefer not to go into details.

other than to mention the name Jack
Last.

Ah, yes.

Jack Last.

It's an investigation that's been going
on for three years. And if Daly is

charged, then I believe that he could
jeopardise the whole operation.

Daly? He's instrumental in key areas.

Wait.

Wait, does this mean... You're telling
me, sir, I've got to... Let him go.

Yes, Sergeant.

We have to consider the larger issue
here.

Riker, are you all right?

What do I always say?

Trust Arthur.

Unbelievable, Arthur. They had to spank
the rights. Spank the rights.

Arthur Daly.

The man they couldn't hold.

I don't want to see either you or Daly
ever again.

The feeling's mutual, Cosa.

Oh, now, God, he did himself an injury.

I deserve it, Mennish.

I deserve the pain.

You should have seen him when he came
out. He said...

Have there been any great technological
advances while I've been away?

How long were you inside for, Arthur?

You can lock a man up, but you cannot
imprison his spirit.

It's up here.

If you've got it up here, incarceration
means nothing.

An hour and a half.

He was banged up for an hour and a half.

Surely you had a right result, thanks to
Terry.

Yeah, yeah, true, true, true.

Once Terry didn't make a pig's ear of
it.

Oh, cheers, Arthur.

We got out of that a treat.

No problem.

Yeah, no problem.

Give them the title. I wonder why they
buried a wheelbarrow.

Him, the title. Bloody Daly. Why they
buried a wheel.

If you want to obtain the situation.

It'd be so good for you