Original subtitles

Hi, George.

Oh, good. You're finally up.

I'm thinking of doing something kind of nuts, and I wanted to give you guys a

chance to talk me out of it.

What is it?

Dick, Joanna, I'm thinking of getting a pair of regular jeans.

I'd say go for it, George, and hell with what society is going to think.

Thanks. I'm going to do it.

Oh, just one more thing. Should I get the ones with the zipper or the button

fly?

On that one, George, you're going to have to follow your heart.

You know, honey, I think we're witnessing the end of an era here.

I'm a little sad.

Zipper, George.

Definitely zipper.

Hi, Brunch Bunch. Is my birthday babe around?

Why does he always come up to our table?

Michael!

And one to grow on.

Hi, dear Joanna.

What can I get you?

How about French toast?

Yeah, me too.

Okay. And you can get me an unlimited supply of Misty Lilac nail polish, a

credit card holder, fully stocked. We have copies of your birthday list.

Okay, but just remember there's only three shopping days left.

Steph's another year older and we're all deeper in debt.

Sorry, sorry, Steph.

Uh, Michael.

I need to talk to you about my birthday.

Now, don't take this as criticism, but what you did for the last three years

all wrong.

When have I failed you, my little fajita?

Michael, one birthday, you bought me a book.

Well, Stephanie, we just met for a while there. I thought you might be deep.

This year, I promise you a perfect birthday.

Oh, good, because, Michael, I've decided I want a nice big party.

Well, Steph, if it's a party you want, it's a party you'll get. I'll send

out for decorations, I can get Dick to put them up, and I can get Joanna to

up a birthday feast.

Um...

No, how? I just can't do it.

George, you're wearing your regular jeans pretty sissy.

Thanks. They were inspected and everything.

Number 21 did all right by me.

So you like them so far, George?

Yeah, except you have to think a lot more wearing these.

What do you mean?

Well, for one thing, your shirt shows more, so you got to pay extra attention

that.

And then there's whether to wear a belt or trust your hips.

Jeans can complicate a life.

George, you want to help me with the balloons?

Well, I was going to go out and strut.

I smelled cake.

Nick's that drool handyman.

Where's Stephanie now? She's out returning one of my gifts. She didn't

it. She just knew.

She's good.

Stephanie, I still have my overalls up in my room.

I don't think that's interesting.

Deb, please stop. I can't bear to see you cry.

You're right. Get all puffy and red.

Stephanie, just please try to calm down and tell us what's bothering you.

Send those tears packing right back to their little ducks with just two words.

Plastic surgery.

When the time comes, you ought to be able to nip and tuck your way to at

another seven, eight years in my heart.

You must really love her.

Stephanie, there's more to life and relationships than looks.

Really?

Just what would you look like?

Michael, if you love Stephanie now, you'll love her when she's 80, right?

say we go down to that party.

and you have the perfect thing to say to cheer me up?

Not exactly. I couldn't sleep thinking about that cake.

Don't bother waking on it. It doesn't work.

This is the worst I've ever felt in my whole life.

You know, Stephanie, I'm sort of older and it's not so bad.

There are a lot of pluses. If you make it to 100, that fat weather guy will

announce your name on TV.

at any age. Knock wood.

I am my looks.

I'm pretty.

Okay, I'm beautiful.

Dazzling people with my looks is all I do.

I'm a single threat, George.

Maybe when I lose my looks, nobody will like me anymore.

Stephanie, you're not just pretty. There's a lot more to you than that.

I've ever seen.

And you like that about me?

No. Actually, it's kind of annoying.

I'm not really cheering you up, am I?

No.

Darn. See, if you'd said no, but thanks anyway, I could have said you're polite.

See, that's the kind of thing I need to go on.

I don't think I can count that one.

Gee, I wish I could make you feel better, Stephanie. Would it help if I

Let's guess no.

Well, good night.

Morning, everybody.

George, what happened to your regular team?

Well, I took them for a trial walk through town this morning, and I

they just weren't me.

I mean, if I can't feel... my knee through my pocket, there's something

with my... I guess I understand.

And it wasn't just that.

A lot of people in this town aren't that used to designer labels.

I didn't really enjoy people squinting at my bottom.

I guess that's where we're different, George.

Boy, it's a great feeling not having to back out of a room.

Here's your pancake.

Here's your juice.

Here's your French toast.

Thank you, Stephanie.

How is everything?

forget something this morning, like grooming.

You noticed?

Well, sort of.

I just wanted to see if people would treat me differently if I didn't look

perfect, like usual.

And you did.

You were mean.

We weren't mean. We were just a little upset here. But now that we've had a...

time to adjust.

I think you look... Fine.

Really?

Well, one of us said it, didn't we?

Well, maybe aging isn't as bad as old people make it seem.

Honey, I know I don't say it often enough, but thanks for grooming.

idea what a horrible thing you did to Stephanie last night. Look, you don't

to tell me. I know I've been a Dudley do -wrong.

I'm gonna make it up to Steph. She's gonna be seeing a brand new Michael

today, I'll tell you that.

And you're going to be seeing a brand new... You'll see.

Hi. Hi, how you doing?

It's just the new me.

Or should I say the old me?

Whoa. Ghost of Steph's future.

Well, could you live with this?

Locked in my room for eternity.

Dick, you've got to talk to her.

Me? But honey, you're so good at making people feel better.

Remember when I thought I was going to get fired from my job?

You said just the right thing to cheer me up.

I asked you to marry me.

Yeah, I got fired and I didn't even care.

All right, I'll do it. I hope I can come up with something besides that proposal

thing.

Stephanie, sit down.

For starters, I didn't hear any creaking.

Stephanie, I know you've been worried about getting older, and everyone gets

older, and there's nothing you can do about it.

I feel much better.

I thought I was good at this.

Uh, Stephanie, you... You wouldn't want to marry me, would you?

Hi,

I'm Larry. This is my brother, Daryl, and this is my other brother, Daryl.

We was wondering if we could borrow some carbon paper.

Daryl here wants to try banging his fist on a table in triplicate.

Hi, Miss Stephanie.

Hope you had a blissful birthday yesterday.

Did you get our birthday gift yet?

I don't think so, Larry.

Daryl, you and your overnight couriers.

Well, just so you won't have to wait any longer, we'll go out and trap you in an

even bigger present.

being so nice to me?

I think I speak for all of us when I say, huh?

Haven't you noticed that I'm ugly?

Miss Stephanie, you could never be ugly to us. We like you.

Yeah, but will you like me when I'm old and gray and

sagging?

How shallow do you think we are?

There's some depth beneath this glitz.

We know that beauty's only skin deep.

You take the weasel.

Ain't a prettier creature on earth.

But once you skin them, they look kind of, well, if I may quote Mad Magazine,

blessed.

But fortunately, underneath the beauty, there's still a lot to recommend to

skinned weasels.

Aside from the obvious gross -out appeal, they're darn good eating.

underneath my obvious and usually stunning beauty?

You betcha, Bob.

I mean, there's times when we've come over here feeling bluer than a whale.

And you'd say something nice.

Not necessarily to us.

But still, it'd cheer us up like nobody's business.

Really?

I do that for you?

Well, I could do that even... With flappy arms.

Oh, thank you, Larry.

All of you.

Oh, guys, here's the carbon paper.

I, uh, I got four for you.

Go for the record.

Oh, boy, thanks.

Oh, and Miss Stephanie, remember, when you're 80 or 90, you'll still have us as

friends. We like old people. We enjoy playing what do you see in the wrinkles.

Bye, guys.

Stephanie, you're better.

You thought about what I said, huh?

No, about what Larry said.

What Larry said?

What did Larry say?

Well, I don't want to get into all the details, but it had to do with Skinny

Weasel.

I heard that.

I was going to get to that.

Stephanie, I've got to talk to you.

Me too.

Michael, I found out I have qualities underneath my looks.

I'm not sure.

I think one of them is I can be nice, and, well, maybe we could find the other

ones together.

You know, Steph, I think you're on to something here, because I had an amazing

revelation, too. Are you ready?

Steph, you're not the most beautiful girl in the world.

Michael, say something else, fast.

Steph, don't you see? You're still the only one for me, which means I must love

you not only for your looks, but for something.

Besides your looks, too.

What besides my looks?

Well, like you said, Steph, we'll find those.

You know what else, Michael?

I'm the only one who's realized that I'm not blossoming anymore.

So I won't actually have to be kind or find those other traits until other

people start noticing I'm not blossoming.

And that won't be for years yet.

That's my Steph.

Forever and ever?

That's what we found out.

That I'll be able to love you no matter what you look like.

Oh, Michael.

Give me a hug.

Oh, wait a minute.

Let's go through this together.