Original subtitles

All set, Dick.

I posted the closed sign out front.

Good, then we're ready to roll. I'm really looking forward to this trip.

be a nice break from lugging people's suitcases around.

Well, I finished wrapping Mr.

Vanderkellen's birthday gift. Are you sure you want to give a millionaire

slippers? It's a pretty good present. I mean, millionaire or not, at night, the

man's tootsies get cold.

Steph, I still don't understand. Why are you bringing empty suitcases?

Michael, it's not that complicated.

When we get to Newport, Mommy will say, Daphne, do you want to go shopping?

And I'll say, no, no, no, I don't need anything. And she'll say, come on, just

one outfit.

And I'll say, okay, but that's it. And then she'll buy out the store and I'll

bring it all back and eat.

Well, why even bring luggage if you're sure it's empty -handed? Maybe they'll

buy you that, too.

Michael, leave the bags.

Now, Steph, no arguments this time. On a long drive like this, I insist you wear

your seatbelt.

Michael, it rumbles my dress.

Sorry, Steph, but I don't want to see my cupcake flying through any windshield.

You can bet I'll be wearing my seatbelt. Yeah, George, whatever you like.

Well, we better get going. It's a five -hour drive to Newport. I've got some

great car games.

Let's play 20 questions.

I'll give you a hint.

It's a living person. David Hasselhoff.

Oh, that's right.

George, maybe we shouldn't play any more games. Oh, okay.

Ninety -nine bottles of beer on the wall. Ninety -nine bottles of beer.

If one of those bottles should happen to fall.

Twenty bottles of beer.

If one of those bottles should happen to fall.

Nineteen bottles of beer on the wall. George.

Hello, Victoria.

Hello. Miss, welcome.

Oh, you've had a very long drive.

Yeah, exactly 1 ,580 miles of beer.

I'll tell your parents you've arrived.

Hi, all these things.

Miss me?

You've lost weight.

Stephanie, my God. This is the most luxurious home I have ever seen.

Slippers?

cold marble to walk on in bare tuxes.

Can you imagine the plumbing they have here? It wouldn't surprise me if the

pipes were all copper.

I bet they are, George.

It's a pity they obscured them with this damn mahogany.

Stephanie!

Hi, Mr. and Mrs. V. Thanks for the invite. Can I stay in the East Wing this

time? Absolutely, but I'm afraid the fourth floor is closed. You see, we're

converting the screening room to Dolby.

Whatever that is.

Come along upstairs, everyone. I'll have the servants show you to your rooms.

Oh, just point the way. We'll be able to find them ourselves.

No, you won't.

Stephanie, do you want to go shopping?

No, no.

Could I see you for just a moment? Si, si, Mr. V.

Michael, it's obvious that you and Stephanie are very fond of each other.

I'd put it more strongly than that, Mr. Vanderkellen. She's... She's my main

muffin.

Quiet.

Well, I love Stephanie very much, too, so I've had this document drawn up.

A prenuptial agreement.

Well, there must be some kind of mistake. Steph and I aren't even

But you're clearly headed in that direction.

Now, if you marry, Well and good. But if you should divorce, that's when this

little baby kicks in.

It simply provides that Stephanie's money should remain hers.

Oh.

Are you sure all this is necessary?

Now, now, now, Michael, I don't want you to feel pressured into this. Read it

carefully, consider each point, think it over, and then sign it.

Oh, no, a fingerprint.

Please don't walk on that.

The floor?

Well, be careful.

Honey, will you relax? This is a guest room, not a museum.

Oh, my God, a Renoir.

Honey, don't worry. I won't walk on it.

Dick. Honey, just because these things are expensive doesn't mean they aren't

meant to be handled using...

In consolation, the floor is okay.

Oh, my God, we owe them $7 million.

I'm sure this is replaceable. We saw hundreds just like this all over Europe.

Well, not like this.

Coming.

Hi, all.

I need someone to witness my signature on this.

What is it? A prenuptial agreement.

I jumped to the same conclusion, Joanna, but I was wrong.

Mr. V is just playing it safe.

Michael, have you read this?

I started to, but they lost me after that first heretofore.

Besides, Mr. V trimmed the fat for me. This just says, if Steph and I divorce,

she gets to keep her fortune.

Well, if you think that's fair, I'll witness it. Great.

It is fair, isn't it? I mean, you'd sign it, right?

Well...

you wouldn't sign it? Well, you know, if it was me, I might feel some of the

phrasing could be construed as hinting that I was, you

know, a blood -sucking gigolo.

Whoa. I'm beginning to have second thoughts about signing this.

I better go mull this over in the hedge maze.

Haven't you finished with that ship arrival section yet?

In a moment, Arthur. I have friends arriving.

Well, I have ships.

Hello.

Oh, well.

How do you like your room?

Lovely. Yeah. Still filled with some beautiful things.

In particular, I'd like to talk to you about the music box with the ballerina

top. Oh, you noticed that?

Of course, it has no monetary value. You see hundreds like it all over Europe.

Its only real value is sentimental. You see, Churchill gave it to me.

Winston... Winston Churchill?

Actually, we call your room the Churchill Room.

Oh, so a lot of the things in there were from Churchill.

No, just the music box.

We built the whole room around it.

Would you like me to show you how the music box works? No, no.

I mean, I'm kind of into reggae.

Oh, dear.

Arthur, one of your super tankers went down.

Again?

I better go buy another one.

He took that awfully well.

Oh, it's just a boat.

It's not like he was sentimentally attached to it.

Dick, you have to tell him. Tell him what? That his room was built around a

of rubble?

Oh, George, thank God you're here. Boy, what a day.

Dexter, the head maintenance man, took me on a complete tour of the grounds.

I don't think there's a duct in the place I haven't had my head into.

Oh, and the plumbing is copper.

Dexter told me if you took all the pipes and laid them end to end, you'd have a

really long pipe.

George, I need your help. I broke the Vander Cullen's music box, and I was

hoping you'd be able to fix it.

Gee, Dick, I'm on vacation.

I kind of wanted to get away from all that handyman stuff.

George, you just stuck your head in every duck. Come on.

Hi, everybody. Where are you going?

Upstairs. Dick broke the... Ow!

Steph, there you are. Look what your father gave to me.

Ew, legal stuff. I'm bored.

Steph, this is a prenuptial agreement your dad wants me to sign. Oh, Michael,

don't know anything about business. Let's order a snack in the intercom and

hide from the servant.

You don't understand, Steph. This document is an insult.

So don't sign it. But, Steph, your papa -son is turning the screws.

Well, I can't let him ruin our vacation like this. I'll talk to him. Great. Be

strong. Don't let him bully us.

Daddy!

Daddy, IBM went under!

What did you say?

Nothing, Daddy. I just wanted to talk to you.

Michael told me about this stupid prenuptial agreement.

Oh, I wouldn't call it stupid, Princess.

Well, Michael doesn't want to sign it, and it's interfering with my funds, so

where's the paper shredder?

Now, Princess, you just listen to me.

You see, you're in love, so you're not objective.

Am too.

No, you're not. For instance, do you find Michael attractive?

Attractive? He's the handsomest man in the world.

Wrong. He is cute, I'll give you that. But there are many men far...

This, uh, Sally chat springs to mind.

You see, love has blinded you. But it's clear to me that if Michael refuses to

sign that document, it means only one thing. He loves you not for yourself,

for your money.

Daddy, that's ridiculous.

If there's one thing I know, it's that Michael loves me for me.

Hi, all. If anyone needs me, I'll be hovering over Tsukasa.

God, I love this place.

I have nothing to say to these people.

Honey, don't be silly. They're just like anybody else.

Hi.

Hello.

What do you do?

I'm president of a country.

Are you okay? You haven't even touched the foie gras.

I'm fine, Michael.

Look, you've barely spoken to me since yesterday.

There's something wrong with my cupcake.

This guy wants... Whoa!

Caviar!

Michael!

I thought you didn't like caviar.

Well, I hate it and it makes me thirsty, but it costs a bazillion dollars an

ounce.

George.

How's the music box coming? The glue is drying now.

Boy, do these folks know how to throw a party.

on a rheostat.

Attention, everybody.

Arthur's going to open his gifts.

I love gifts.

It almost compensates for being one year closer to dead.

Arthur. It's my birthday, so I can say what I like.

I think I'll open this one first. It's from the Brentwoods.

Hopperware. And you were worried?

What a lovely name, a racehorse.

Now this one's from the car stairs.

A Gutenberg Bible.

This one goes right by the bed.

Let's hope he doesn't get around to our gift until after everyone leaves.

This one's from the Loudons.

Footwear.

These come from one of my factories.

Oh, it's a joke gift.

Bravo, love.

We could hardly keep a straight face until you opened it.

Isn't that an exciting step? A racehorse? A Gutenberg Bible. I wonder

next. Something platinum, I hope.

Michael, why don't we take a walk in the garden? Just the two of us.

Oh, why don't you start without me?

If he gets any duplicate gifts I want to be in, I'll take that distance.

Daddy was right.

You don't love me for me. You love me for my money. What? How can you say such

thing? A main car cover.

Wow!

Step away.

The glue's dry.

Absolutely perfect.

They'll never guess anything was wrong.

George, I guess I broke the cylinder.

Dick, why don't you just tell the Vanderkellens what happened? It's the

honorable thing to do.

Honey, let's give the devious thing one more shot.

George, you think you can fix it?

Well, I guess so.

I was planning to have a nightcap and check out the crawl space.

Hi, George.

Michael.

Nick, Joanna, can I bend your ear for a moment? Sure, Michael.

Michael, what's wrong?

I think I'm going to lose Steph.

She locked herself in her room and she won't even talk to me.

She thinks I only love her for her money.

Well, that doesn't sound like you, Michael, does it, Dick?

No. I don't know.

I think maybe Steph's right.

Michael, I refuse to believe you're after Stephanie's money. Reasons,

Well, you tell me. What is it you like about her?

Well, the usual things.

She's pretty.

She dresses well.

She has that cute little button nose.

Would you love her if she didn't dress well? No.

She wasn't pretty. Date a dog? Not in this lifetime.

Would you love her if she was poor? Well, sure. As long as she's still

well and was pretty.

Whoa, did you hear what I just said?

I'd love Steph even if she was poor. I don't want her for her money.

Frank, you're... You're not a gold digger. You're just... superficial.

Yeah, thanks.

I'm gonna go fight for my cupcake.

I'm going to prove to you and your father one control that I'm not

your money.

Wow!

Good start, Michael.

Oh, there you are, Mr. Vanderkellen. They told me you'd be down here.

Apparently they were right.

Mr. V, all this talk about prenups has started some pretty serious doubts

bouncing around.

I, uh, I refuse to sign this thing, but I want both of you to know that I love

Steph.

Or herself.

Well, I'm glad that's over.

What are we pouring?

We're not.

Huh?

Michael, I'd really like to believe you, but the way you've been acting, maybe

Daddy's right.

Well, I was worried about the same thing, but Dick and Joanna helped me to

realize that I'm not a gold digger.

I'm just superficial.

Michael, are you sure?

Well... Anyone can pass themselves off as superficial.

But why should we believe you're not a gold digger?

Try this on.

I fell for Steph the moment I saw her.

As far as I knew, the only gold she had was in her hair.

Really, Michael?

You knew her name was Vandakellen. That doesn't exactly say, Buster, can you

spare a dime?

She's good.

Okay. Remember the time we walked to the top of that hill and the sun was

setting over Mirror Lake?

The leaves were starting to turn gold.

Somewhere, a loon was calling.

There were streaks of orange and yellow in the sky, but I didn't notice any of

that crud.

Because I couldn't take my eyes off your new sweater.

Exactamente.

All right, you've convinced me you are superficial.

But not that your intentions are honorable.

Then I give up.

I guess the only thing that'll convince you is... is this.

Michael, don't! Do!

Daddy! Butt out.

Now I'm sure that Michael loves me for myself.

And if you'll excuse us, we have some serious making up to do.

But Prince... Daddy.

I love you.

Happy birthday.

Now hit the stairs.

All right. But it's a good thing I'm rich. I can do my pouting in Aruba.

Steph, I've never felt closer to you than at this moment.

Here.

Now you'll never have to doubt me again.

And you never have to doubt me.

Wow.

George, where have you been?

I couldn't fix the cylinder, so I had to buy a new one. Boy, are these things

hard to find.

Who is it?

It's Arthur and Marion.

How's it coming, Jess? One more minute.

Arthur and Marion who?

First joke gifts, and now this.

Come in.

I hope we're not intruding, but we just couldn't let you leave without playing

that music box for you.

Oh, good, because I was afraid to touch it.

The charming little thing.

Winnie loved this tune. Listen.