All language subtitles for Newhart s06e03 Inn This Corner

So everything in this inn is exactly the
way it was in the 18th century?

That's right.

They had Antonella on carpet back then?

Well, yeah, those were the more advanced
looms.

Oh, you two really seem to have a great
life here. This place is perfect.

Well, almost.

Like, I've always wanted a piano over in
here where people could come in and

gather around.

And stare because no one here knows how
to play.

Honey, with all those people standing
and staring, there'd be a lot of

on one of us to learn.

Even without the piano, this is the best
place we have ever stayed.

Well, we've got one more stop left on
the tour. Dick's study. Yeah, this is

where the magic happens.

And he writes books in here, too.

Hi, um...

I'm Larry.

This is my brother, Daryl. And this is
my other brother, Daryl. Hi, guys.

Fellas, this is Leah and Carrie Myers.

We were just giving them a tour of the
inn. Oh, could we hook up with you now?

Or do we have to wait for the rest of
the group to come by?

Actually, the tour is over.

Good, because we wanted to throw
something at you and see if it sticks.

It's all right. It's just a figure of
speech.

Right, guys?

Yeah, sorry to disappoint.

Things haven't been going so well at the
cafe.

We need your opinion.

About what?

Used food.

How do you feel about it?

Well, that depends.

What are you going to do with it?

Serve it.

See, we've noticed that we've been
getting a lot of our food back with just

couple of bites taken out of it.

We figured if we priced it at a small
discount, a slightly irregular hamburger

could become quite popular.

Daryl worked out the figures, and it
seems we could get three to five times

return on a single piece of meat.

Guys, could we talk about this later?

Sure. How about you guys come over and
join us for supper?

Be the first to sample our new idea.

Oh. Well, actually, the second.

Guys, this sounds like something we
should discuss over the phone.

Okay. Darrell, let's get to work on his
new slogan. How's this?

Clean the plate of someone who didn't.

Friends of yours?

Well, let's put it this way. They live
in the neighborhood, and as innkeepers,

it wouldn't be right to lock the front
door.

Why don't you guys join us for dinner
tonight? We're going to have baked

halibut. Well, we were going to check
out the scenery.

Why don't you have dinner with us and...
Look at these.

Okay, we will. Great!

I think you're really going to enjoy the
fish.

Joanna and I hardly touched it last
night.

Okay. Two grapefruit halves. But I
ordered the jumbo stack of pancakes.

Trust me.

Morning, guys.

Morning, George.

Morning, George.

Boy, if we had a dog, I'd think he was
dead.

We don't, do we?

No, it's nothing worse.

It's the Myers.

No, no, George.

The Myers are checking out today. We're
going to meet them.

Oh, darn.

They're leaving already?

Gee, they're probably the nicest couple
I've ever met here.

Not counting you two, of course. Well,
you don't really count because you live

here.

Of course, it did take me a while to
warm up to you two. Especially you,

First couple of weeks, I thought you
were... George!

To be with, they're the only couple in
history who have ever gotten Dick to

charades.

Really? Dick?

Charades? Once I got the hang of it, I
was pretty unbeatable.

They're just two of the most likable
people I've ever met.

Yeah, they were a pretty nice couple.

Stephanie, you liked some guests?

Uh -huh.

They were real sweet.

I only had to tell them once, and from
then on they did all their own chores.

Try not to let Carrie and Leah see you
like this. I mean, I'm sure they're

feeling bad enough themselves.

Good morning!

I guess they don't like you anywhere as
near as much as you like them.

You're never gonna believe what we just
did. I can't believe what we just did.

What? Wait, wait.

How many words? Oh!

You bought something.

You bought a house.

They bought a house.

That's terrific. Where?

In the kitchen.

You bought a house in the kitchen.

No, no, no, no, no. Down the block?

You bought that old Victorian down the
block?

That's great. We're going to be
neighbors. Wait, wait, there's more.

You... You're turning.

You're turning what?

You're turning the house... In.

You're turning the house in?

You're turning the house...

Dick, stop gloating. We came over here
to wish them well.

Right. We do like these people, and we
know how hard it is to get an inn off

ground, and these people need our
support. They call this a lobby?

Dick, Joanna, welcome to the Loon Inn.

So, what do you think now that it's all
done?

Well, I just can't believe you got all
this done in one month.

Gorgeous bay window, lovely wallpaper,
and beautiful hardwood floors.

My piano.

Honey, why don't you give Carrie the
gift we brought them?

That's my piano.

Dick.

All right.

Congratulations.

It's supposed to be the hardest jigsaw
puzzle in the world.

3 ,000 pieces all black.

Yeah, we would have gone crazy the first
couple months, you know, waiting for

people to check in.

Hadn't meant for that, baby.

And maybe, you know, you won't have that
kind of time.

Sorry, I wasn't here to greet you. Can
you believe this?

Hey, did you see our review in the
Boston Globe?

No, we were the only ones in the free
world who didn't.

You won't believe this, Dick, but we
called them up and their travel editor

running right over.

Hey, I wanted to ask you, how do you
handle your waiting list?

Pretty much like this.

Oh, Dick, Joanna, this is Susan, our
maid. Oh, hi.

Oh,

boy, it just never stops, does it?

Did you get everyone's kids to sleep?
One and a half fairy tales, and they

out like a light.

Sounds like you like kids. Oh, yes, I
love them.

You might even like guests, too.

I'm a people person.

More wine?

I think when God was handing out hired
help, he said, watch what I do to the

loudest.

Okay, everybody. You know what time it
is.

Well, for something terrific, I'll bet.

Gray skies are gonna clear up. Put on a
happy face, everybody.

So put on a happy face.

Uh, is, uh, is this the, uh, the loon
in?

Do, uh, do, uh, do you have, do you have
a room for tonight?

I, I see. Help.

How soon will one be available?

I don't know if I can wait that long. I
am an elderly gentleman.

Bye. Bye, Sonny.

Dick, you forgot to ask if they have
Prince Albert in a can.

Book through the end of the year. Now do
you believe me? We're goners.

Honey, don't you think you're making a
little too much out of this?

I don't know. They open, we close.

Maybe you're right. It's no big deal.

Good morning, everybody.

Good morning, Stephanie.

It's almost 11 o 'clock.

11? Oh, no.

I wanted to be in the stores by 10.

Stephanie, are you ever planning to dust
and vacuum again during your stay here?

What on earth for, Dick?

I mean, nobody's here.

Nobody's here, right? Nobody called
ahead for reservations?

Well, no.

Darn.

Before you go, if we had some guests and
they

had kids, would you consider babysitting
for them?

I'd burn my hair first.

Well, that might entertain the kids.

Oh, good.

They're here.

Hi, I'm Larry. This is my brother Daryl,
and this is my other brother Daryl. We

got something to discuss with you.

Sure does.

We'll break it to you gently.

You're ruining our lives.

All I can say is, oops.

All these years we've been racking our
brains trying to come up with some

promotional ideas, i .e.

used food, organ meat of the week.

and a disappointing gizzard on a stick.

But now we realize all the ingenuity in
the world won't help us overcome our

biggest liability, our location, smack
dab right next to the black hole of

commerce.

We'd like to ask you a favor, and feel
free to say no.

Would you consider shifting your end
back a few feet so that there's a more

direct view of our place from the loon?

No.

Darn.

Looks like we built our forearms up for
nothing.

Oh, George, sit down. We're going to
have a meeting.

Uh -oh.

This is it, isn't it?

This is just the way it happened the
last time the inn went under.

It did?

This is a meeting to get more people to
come here, so I have to do work again.

I don't really think I want to be any
part of it.

Now, it's no secret

that the business hasn't exactly been
booming. Is that a car?

It is!

They're pulling in.

They're looking at a map.

They're pointing to the loon.

They're driving away.

I can't watch anymore.

Okay, we've played dead long enough.

And we've got to come up with a plan
that'll put us back on top.

Dick, while you guys think, is it okay
if I start boarding up a few windows?

George, sit down.

What's the use?

The old owners try to laugh.

ditch effort to save this place, too.

Wait a minute. Are you saying the
Stratford closed before?

And it might close again?

And if that happened, I don't suppose
you'd keep on paying me.

Well, come on, people. What are we going
to do?

Okay, the first thing to do is to get
this place in tip -top working order.

since I want to keep the staff I have,

I think each one of us should come up
with a way that we could be better at

jobs. All right.

Join. Okay.

I've been thinking we could put together
a whole pampering weekend package.

Stephanie could even serve people
breakfast in bed.

George?

I might be able to make the basement
into a game room if Stephanie could help

clean out some of the junk and cobwebs.

Great, George.

Stephanie?

George, going under, was it really that
bad?

Hi, hi, Stratford inmates.

Still doing solitary?

Michael, we're in the middle of a
meeting.

Oh, you mean about this place going
belly up?

Well, listen, I've been giving the
problem some thought, and I think I've

up with a solution.

Picture the neon.

Dick's Rendezvous Inn.

Heart -shaped beds, a few well -placed
mirrors. You've got a whole new ambiance

here.

No. Trust me, the only way to fight
quality is with sleeves.

Okay.

I've got one more idea in the winner's
circle.

Start rumors about the other place, huh?

Maybe that poltergeist thing?

Or no, wait.

The ghost from Amityville.

Give it up, Michael.

Well, Joanna, that spook had to go
somewhere. Who's to say it's not right

the street?

It could be.

Everybody else is.

I didn't know you played.

Well, I don't really. That's all I know.

Just the one song? No, just the one
intro.

See, last year at the Beaver Pancake
Fest, I won a one -hour piano lesson

Mrs. Klinkerman at Klinkerman's Piano
and Tractor Emporium.

But you know, Dick...

it takes more than an hour to learn how
to play the piano.

So that was as far as she could teach me
before the timer dinged.

I hate this stupid dress.

It makes me look like a maid.

And the people who just pulled into the
driveway are probably going to see me in

it. George, go look and make sure
they're getting out of the car.

No way. I've been burned too many times.

All right, this is it. This is the
beginning of the new and approved...

Stratford Inn. All right, everybody,
line up.

Welcome

to

the Stratford.

I actually come from a very wealthy
background.

Stephanie. Well, you made me wear this.

Hi, I'm Dick Loudon, and this is my fun
-loving wife, Joanna, and everybody's

pal, George.

I'm Dick.

I'm sure we're going to be real, real
good friends.

Orders? No, thanks.

My daddy could buy and sell you.

Stephanie, would you please go and get
room four ready?

Actually, I think we'd like to wait just
a little while.

Why? Well, see, we're on standby at the
loon.

You can see the other end from the
porch.

It's almost like we're there.

Yeah, it's quite a photo opportunity
right out there along that railing.

Oh, if that's for you, could you keep it
short in case the loon's trying to get

through to us?

Hello, Stratford Inn.

Well, you're in luck. It's the loon. Be
nice.

Okay, I'll tell him.

It doesn't look good.

Now what are we supposed to do?

I know this may be kind of out of left
field, but... You know, you can stay

here.

What do you think?

Well, it's either this place or sleeping
in the car.

Well, we don't have to decide now.

I mean, there's no chance you're going
to fill up, right?

No.

But in five minutes, everybody's pal
George will throw you out.

Okay. Okay.

Room four, top of the stairs to your
right, and George will bring up your

luggage.

Honey, it won't be that bad.

I hate this place. I feel like I'm in
hell.

Guests of the new, improved Stratford.

Just what I've always wanted, a hotel
full of bitter, loon rejects.

Someone's coming up the walk.

Okay, everybody, let's get into our...
I'm not lining up until I know they're

staying.

Harry, Leo.

Oh, good, people were serving for their
own.

Mind if we sit down for a while?

I just wanted to go someplace for a few
minutes of peace and quiet.

Funny, funny, I...

place would have popped into your mind.

Boy, you guys have it made.

This is the kind of inn we wanted to
build.

How do you create such a quiet, relaxed
atmosphere?

Hey, we're not giving away all our
secrets.

If we'd wanted the rat race, we would
have stayed in the city.

This word of mouth is killing us.

Tell you the truth, Dick, we're thinking
of selling.

You are.

Someone's already made us an offer.

The bizarre thing is they don't even
want to use it as an inn.

They just want to live there.

Do you think we should sell?

We're probably not the people to ask.

Oh, come on. Talk us out of it.

Don't sell.

Nice try, Dick, but we really have to.

We're going to miss you guys.

All I can say is ditto.

Well, thanks for all your help.

I guess we better get back and start
canceling all those reservations.

Oh, we could refer them all to the
Stratford. Oh, no.

Couldn't do that to Dick and Joanna.

Well, it's...

You know, it'd be a nightmare, but...
You know, feel free, just...

Just this once.

Oh.

You guys.

Bye.

Well, we shut him down inside of a
month.