All language subtitles for Newhart s04e24 Pre-Nups

All set, Dick.

I posted the closed sign out front.

Good, then we're ready to roll. I'm
really looking forward to this trip.

be a nice break from lugging people's
suitcases around.

Well, I finished wrapping Mr.

Vanderkellen's birthday gift. Are you
sure you want to give a millionaire

slippers? It's a pretty good present. I
mean, millionaire or not, at night, the

man's tootsies get cold.

Steph, I still don't understand. Why are
you bringing empty suitcases?

Michael, it's not that complicated.

When we get to Newport, Mommy will say,
Daphne, do you want to go shopping?

And I'll say, no, no, no, I don't need
anything. And she'll say, come on, just

one outfit.

And I'll say, okay, but that's it. And
then she'll buy out the store and I'll

bring it all back and eat.

Well, why even bring luggage if you're
sure it's empty -handed? Maybe they'll

buy you that, too.

Michael, leave the bags.

Now, Steph, no arguments this time. On a
long drive like this, I insist you wear

your seatbelt.

Michael, it rumbles my dress.

Sorry, Steph, but I don't want to see my
cupcake flying through any windshield.

You can bet I'll be wearing my seatbelt.
Yeah, George, whatever you like.

Well, we better get going. It's a five
-hour drive to Newport. I've got some

great car games.

Let's play 20 questions.

I'll give you a hint.

It's a living person. David Hasselhoff.

Oh, that's right.

George, maybe we shouldn't play any more
games. Oh, okay.

Ninety -nine bottles of beer on the
wall. Ninety -nine bottles of beer.

If one of those bottles should happen to
fall.

Twenty bottles of beer.

If one of those bottles should happen to
fall.

Nineteen bottles of beer on the wall.
George.

Hello, Victoria.

Hello. Miss, welcome.

Oh, you've had a very long drive.

Yeah, exactly 1 ,580 miles of beer.

I'll tell your parents you've arrived.

Hi, all these things.

Miss me?

You've lost weight.

Stephanie, my God. This is the most
luxurious home I have ever seen.

Slippers?

cold marble to walk on in bare tuxes.

Can you imagine the plumbing they have
here? It wouldn't surprise me if the

pipes were all copper.

I bet they are, George.

It's a pity they obscured them with this
damn mahogany.

Stephanie!

Hi, Mr. and Mrs. V. Thanks for the
invite. Can I stay in the East Wing this

time? Absolutely, but I'm afraid the
fourth floor is closed. You see, we're

converting the screening room to Dolby.

Whatever that is.

Come along upstairs, everyone. I'll have
the servants show you to your rooms.

Oh, just point the way. We'll be able to
find them ourselves.

No, you won't.

Stephanie, do you want to go shopping?

No, no.

Could I see you for just a moment? Si,
si, Mr. V.

Michael, it's obvious that you and
Stephanie are very fond of each other.

I'd put it more strongly than that, Mr.
Vanderkellen. She's... She's my main

muffin.

Quiet.

Well, I love Stephanie very much, too,
so I've had this document drawn up.

A prenuptial agreement.

Well, there must be some kind of
mistake. Steph and I aren't even

But you're clearly headed in that
direction.

Now, if you marry, Well and good. But if
you should divorce, that's when this

little baby kicks in.

It simply provides that Stephanie's
money should remain hers.

Oh.

Are you sure all this is necessary?

Now, now, now, Michael, I don't want you
to feel pressured into this. Read it

carefully, consider each point, think it
over, and then sign it.

Oh, no, a fingerprint.

Please don't walk on that.

The floor?

Well, be careful.

Honey, will you relax? This is a guest
room, not a museum.

Oh, my God, a Renoir.

Honey, don't worry. I won't walk on it.

Dick. Honey, just because these things
are expensive doesn't mean they aren't

meant to be handled using...

In consolation, the floor is okay.

Oh, my God, we owe them $7 million.

I'm sure this is replaceable. We saw
hundreds just like this all over Europe.

Well, not like this.

Coming.

Hi, all.

I need someone to witness my signature
on this.

What is it? A prenuptial agreement.

I jumped to the same conclusion, Joanna,
but I was wrong.

Mr. V is just playing it safe.

Michael, have you read this?

I started to, but they lost me after
that first heretofore.

Besides, Mr. V trimmed the fat for me.
This just says, if Steph and I divorce,

she gets to keep her fortune.

Well, if you think that's fair, I'll
witness it. Great.

It is fair, isn't it? I mean, you'd sign
it, right?

Well...

you wouldn't sign it? Well, you know, if
it was me, I might feel some of the

phrasing could be construed as hinting
that I was, you

know, a blood -sucking gigolo.

Whoa. I'm beginning to have second
thoughts about signing this.

I better go mull this over in the hedge
maze.

Haven't you finished with that ship
arrival section yet?

In a moment, Arthur. I have friends
arriving.

Well, I have ships.

Hello.

Oh, well.

How do you like your room?

Lovely. Yeah. Still filled with some
beautiful things.

In particular, I'd like to talk to you
about the music box with the ballerina

top. Oh, you noticed that?

Of course, it has no monetary value. You
see hundreds like it all over Europe.

Its only real value is sentimental. You
see, Churchill gave it to me.

Winston... Winston Churchill?

Actually, we call your room the
Churchill Room.

Oh, so a lot of the things in there were
from Churchill.

No, just the music box.

We built the whole room around it.

Would you like me to show you how the
music box works? No, no.

I mean, I'm kind of into reggae.

Oh, dear.

Arthur, one of your super tankers went
down.

Again?

I better go buy another one.

He took that awfully well.

Oh, it's just a boat.

It's not like he was sentimentally
attached to it.

Dick, you have to tell him. Tell him
what? That his room was built around a

of rubble?

Oh, George, thank God you're here. Boy,
what a day.

Dexter, the head maintenance man, took
me on a complete tour of the grounds.

I don't think there's a duct in the
place I haven't had my head into.

Oh, and the plumbing is copper.

Dexter told me if you took all the pipes
and laid them end to end, you'd have a

really long pipe.

George, I need your help. I broke the
Vander Cullen's music box, and I was

hoping you'd be able to fix it.

Gee, Dick, I'm on vacation.

I kind of wanted to get away from all
that handyman stuff.

George, you just stuck your head in
every duck. Come on.

Hi, everybody. Where are you going?

Upstairs. Dick broke the... Ow!

Steph, there you are. Look what your
father gave to me.

Ew, legal stuff. I'm bored.

Steph, this is a prenuptial agreement
your dad wants me to sign. Oh, Michael,

don't know anything about business.
Let's order a snack in the intercom and

hide from the servant.

You don't understand, Steph. This
document is an insult.

So don't sign it. But, Steph, your papa
-son is turning the screws.

Well, I can't let him ruin our vacation
like this. I'll talk to him. Great. Be

strong. Don't let him bully us.

Daddy!

Daddy, IBM went under!

What did you say?

Nothing, Daddy. I just wanted to talk to
you.

Michael told me about this stupid
prenuptial agreement.

Oh, I wouldn't call it stupid, Princess.

Well, Michael doesn't want to sign it,
and it's interfering with my funds, so

where's the paper shredder?

Now, Princess, you just listen to me.

You see, you're in love, so you're not
objective.

Am too.

No, you're not. For instance, do you
find Michael attractive?

Attractive? He's the handsomest man in
the world.

Wrong. He is cute, I'll give you that.
But there are many men far...

This, uh, Sally chat springs to mind.

You see, love has blinded you. But it's
clear to me that if Michael refuses to

sign that document, it means only one
thing. He loves you not for yourself,

for your money.

Daddy, that's ridiculous.

If there's one thing I know, it's that
Michael loves me for me.

Hi, all. If anyone needs me, I'll be
hovering over Tsukasa.

God, I love this place.

I have nothing to say to these people.

Honey, don't be silly. They're just like
anybody else.

Hi.

Hello.

What do you do?

I'm president of a country.

Are you okay? You haven't even touched
the foie gras.

I'm fine, Michael.

Look, you've barely spoken to me since
yesterday.

There's something wrong with my cupcake.

This guy wants... Whoa!

Caviar!

Michael!

I thought you didn't like caviar.

Well, I hate it and it makes me thirsty,
but it costs a bazillion dollars an

ounce.

George.

How's the music box coming? The glue is
drying now.

Boy, do these folks know how to throw a
party.

on a rheostat.

Attention, everybody.

Arthur's going to open his gifts.

I love gifts.

It almost compensates for being one year
closer to dead.

Arthur. It's my birthday, so I can say
what I like.

I think I'll open this one first. It's
from the Brentwoods.

Hopperware. And you were worried?

What a lovely name, a racehorse.

Now this one's from the car stairs.

A Gutenberg Bible.

This one goes right by the bed.

Let's hope he doesn't get around to our
gift until after everyone leaves.

This one's from the Loudons.

Footwear.

These come from one of my factories.

Oh, it's a joke gift.

Bravo, love.

We could hardly keep a straight face
until you opened it.

Isn't that an exciting step? A
racehorse? A Gutenberg Bible. I wonder

next. Something platinum, I hope.

Michael, why don't we take a walk in the
garden? Just the two of us.

Oh, why don't you start without me?

If he gets any duplicate gifts I want to
be in, I'll take that distance.

Daddy was right.

You don't love me for me. You love me
for my money. What? How can you say such

thing? A main car cover.

Wow!

Step away.

The glue's dry.

Absolutely perfect.

They'll never guess anything was wrong.

George, I guess I broke the cylinder.

Dick, why don't you just tell the
Vanderkellens what happened? It's the

honorable thing to do.

Honey, let's give the devious thing one
more shot.

George, you think you can fix it?

Well, I guess so.

I was planning to have a nightcap and
check out the crawl space.

Hi, George.

Michael.

Nick, Joanna, can I bend your ear for a
moment? Sure, Michael.

Michael, what's wrong?

I think I'm going to lose Steph.

She locked herself in her room and she
won't even talk to me.

She thinks I only love her for her
money.

Well, that doesn't sound like you,
Michael, does it, Dick?

No. I don't know.

I think maybe Steph's right.

Michael, I refuse to believe you're
after Stephanie's money. Reasons,

Well, you tell me. What is it you like
about her?

Well, the usual things.

She's pretty.

She dresses well.

She has that cute little button nose.

Would you love her if she didn't dress
well? No.

She wasn't pretty. Date a dog? Not in
this lifetime.

Would you love her if she was poor?
Well, sure. As long as she's still

well and was pretty.

Whoa, did you hear what I just said?

I'd love Steph even if she was poor. I
don't want her for her money.

Frank, you're... You're not a gold
digger. You're just... superficial.

Yeah, thanks.

I'm gonna go fight for my cupcake.

I'm going to prove to you and your
father one control that I'm not

your money.

Wow!

Good start, Michael.

Oh, there you are, Mr. Vanderkellen.
They told me you'd be down here.

Apparently they were right.

Mr. V, all this talk about prenups has
started some pretty serious doubts

bouncing around.

I, uh, I refuse to sign this thing, but
I want both of you to know that I love

Steph.

Or herself.

Well, I'm glad that's over.

What are we pouring?

We're not.

Huh?

Michael, I'd really like to believe you,
but the way you've been acting, maybe

Daddy's right.

Well, I was worried about the same
thing, but Dick and Joanna helped me to

realize that I'm not a gold digger.

I'm just superficial.

Michael, are you sure?

Well... Anyone can pass themselves off
as superficial.

But why should we believe you're not a
gold digger?

Try this on.

I fell for Steph the moment I saw her.

As far as I knew, the only gold she had
was in her hair.

Really, Michael?

You knew her name was Vandakellen. That
doesn't exactly say, Buster, can you

spare a dime?

She's good.

Okay. Remember the time we walked to the
top of that hill and the sun was

setting over Mirror Lake?

The leaves were starting to turn gold.

Somewhere, a loon was calling.

There were streaks of orange and yellow
in the sky, but I didn't notice any of

that crud.

Because I couldn't take my eyes off your
new sweater.

Exactamente.

All right, you've convinced me you are
superficial.

But not that your intentions are
honorable.

Then I give up.

I guess the only thing that'll convince
you is... is this.

Michael, don't! Do!

Daddy! Butt out.

Now I'm sure that Michael loves me for
myself.

And if you'll excuse us, we have some
serious making up to do.

But Prince... Daddy.

I love you.

Happy birthday.

Now hit the stairs.

All right. But it's a good thing I'm
rich. I can do my pouting in Aruba.

Steph, I've never felt closer to you
than at this moment.

Here.

Now you'll never have to doubt me again.

And you never have to doubt me.

Wow.

George, where have you been?

I couldn't fix the cylinder, so I had to
buy a new one. Boy, are these things

hard to find.

Who is it?

It's Arthur and Marion.

How's it coming, Jess? One more minute.

Arthur and Marion who?

First joke gifts, and now this.

Come in.

I hope we're not intruding, but we just
couldn't let you leave without playing

that music box for you.

Oh, good, because I was afraid to touch
it.

The charming little thing.

Winnie loved this tune. Listen.