All language subtitles for Newhart s02e03 Animal Attractions

You want anything else, honey?

The only thing I could think of would be
the sports section.

I'm reading the sports section.

I know.

Here, honey, why don't you read this
until he's through? I don't want your

section. I want my section.

Is this going to keep up or will I have
to leave?

Morning.

Coffee? Yes. In fact, I think coffee is
all we'll be having this morning.

Would anyone here like some more coffee?

Yeah, I'll have some.

Not when I'm here.

Don't look now, but did you see the
couple who just came in?

Guys?

What about them?

I caught them trying to sneak out last
night.

Will you stop?

What happened?

It was about three in the morning.

I was thirsty, so I came down to the
kitchen for some Perrier with a wedge of

lime on crushed ice.

By the way, we're out of Perrier. Who do
I tell?

Stephanie, forget that. What about the
Putnams?

I saw them coming down the stairs on
their tiptoes.

Well, maybe they were thirsty and were
trying to be quiet.

They were dressed and carrying all of
their luggage.

Some people make more out of getting a
drink than others.

I can't believe it. What? People are
dishonest? That they even thought they

could get away with something like this.
And they would have if I could stand to

drink tap water.

Dick, what are we going to do?

If there's nothing we can do, we'll just
have to keep an eye on him.

Sit. Stay.

Guess what I found.

A dog?

Yeah. He followed me home from the
woods.

Oh, isn't he adorable?

He's precious.

He's not rabid, is he?

Look at him.

Hi.

I don't think he likes you. Yeah, well,
then just keep him away from me, okay?

What kind is he? I don't know. He
probably looks a mutt.

Are you going to keep him? Oh, no, I
couldn't do that.

Besides, he probably belongs to
somebody.

Didn't he have a tag?

No, nothing. It's a shame, too. His
owner must be worried sick.

Maybe he was abandoned.

What kind of person would do a thing
like that?

Garbage.

George, maybe you should put an ad in
the Lost and Found. Yeah, I think I

He's kind of cute, isn't he? I guess
everybody had a dog when they were

up. I did.

Mine was Buster. He was part setter,
part retriever. What kind did you have,

Dick?

I didn't actually have a dog.

What did you have?

I had that other incredibly popular pet.

You had a swan?

I think he means a cat.

A cat?

A big cat.

A tomcat?

No, actually he was an angora. A what?

An angora.

An angora? A big angora.

You mean one of those fluffy cats named
Snowball?

He wasn't fluffy and he wasn't named
Snowball.

His name was Butch.

Butch the Angora Cat.

Plenty of dogs were afraid of that,
Angora. I bet. They shed like crazy.

George, does this dog know any tricks?

So far, all he's done is shake.

Really? He shakes hands?

No, I meant he just shakes. I think he's
nervous.

Maybe I'd better take him out.

What a great -looking dog. Is he yours?
No, I just found him. I hope I can find

his owner. Come on, boy. Oh, you sweet.

Joe,

what are you two planning on doing
today?

Oh, we don't know. We just thought we'd
go out for a while. Oh.

Well, have a nice day.

Thanks.

Okay.

It's all clear.

Oh, hi, Mr. Putnam. Checking out? What?

No.

What a lovely place this is.

Isn't that your suitcase?

By golly, I think it is.

Well, guess I better get this back to
our lovely room.

Oh, hi, Mr. Putnam. You checking out?

Heck no.

Why is everybody so anxious for us to
leave?

We're having a great time.

See you later.

I hope so.

Dick, I just caught them throwing their
luggage off the balcony. I can't believe

people would do this.

Come on, honey, it's a challenge. It's
that childish thing in people that says,

hey, maybe I can get away with
something.

Hi. Hi, George.

I saw your ad in the Lost and Found.

Yeah, I think I may have found the
owner. Somebody called a little while

They should be here any minute. Really?

Doesn't take long to get attached, does
it?

Oh, it sure doesn't. You should have
seen him last night. He was having a

nightmare. I reached over and patted his
head. You know what he did? He kissed

me. Then he went back to sleep.

I'm glad I was there.

I'll bet he was, too.

He'll be happier with his real owner.

He seems pretty happy here.

You know how dogs are.

Well, cats can't be much different.

Excuse me.

Stratford Inn.

Can I tell her who's calling?

Oh, it's Carl.

Hang up.

I'm not going to hang up.

Then tell him I'm not here. I already
told him you were here.

Hold on. Could you hold on just a
second?

I'm not going to talk to him, Dick.

Stephanie, you have to. Why? Because you
were married to him. Only for a couple

of days.

Could you hold on just one more second?

wanted to be more responsible. Not now.

Stephanie, if you love them enough to
marry him, the least you can do is talk

him. Gee, I hate this.

I don't want to talk to him. I'm not
good at confrontation. I'll just die.

Hi, Carl.

Fine.

Really?

You're in Vermont.

How nice.

Well, of course I'd love to see you.

I didn't expect to see you again in my
life, but... As long as you're here.

Perfect.

Can't wait.

Bye.

He wants to see me. Did he say why?

If I know Carl, he probably wants to
find out why I walk out on him.

You mean you never told him?

How do you tell your husband you're
leaving without telling him why?

You wait until he's in the shower and
you say...

I'm leaving you.

I don't believe this. But don't you see
what you've done? By running away from

one confrontation, you've just made this
one even worse.

Well, I can fix that. How?

I'm running away from this one, too.

Well, I'm leaving.

Wait on us, Stephanie.

I'd love to, Dick. But Carl will be here
soon. I've got to run.

All right, fine. Go.

But would you mind telling me...

Tell him I'm very sorry, but at the last
minute I suddenly remembered I had to

go to Japan.

He's never going to believe that.

But that's where I'm going.

I'll send for the rest of my luggage.

Stephanie, I'm not going to let you do
this.

You owe that man an explanation.

Maybe so.

But if I tell him why I left, I'm only
going to hurt him.

I'm talking to you as a friend.

You walk out that door, young lady, and
you're never coming back.

Well, I'm sorry.

Because you know how much I care about
you people and how much I appreciate all

you've done for me.

But I just can't be here when Carl
comes.

And nothing you say can change my mind.

She left.

She's gone.

You didn't tell me it was going to rain.

Does that make a difference?

It does to me.

It's like a sign.

A sign?

Look at me. My coat is suede. My bag is
suede. I think somebody's trying to tell

me something.

Does that mean you're staying?

What else can I do?

Boy, this is going to be hard.

Stephanie, I don't mean to wax
philosophical, but I think you'll find

where the confrontation, the
anticipation far exceeds the actual

When he gets here, I'll probably die.

Well, that would shoot the hell out of
that theory.

He's going to be here soon. I'd better
go start on my hair.

I just know this weather is going to
make it frizz.

I think I'll go up and help her.

I saw a car pulling up. I think it may
be the people about the ad.

Where's the dog?

I've got him out on the back porch. You
should see him when he's all brushed.

How does he look?

The same, only smoother.

I bet you hear about the dog.

Yeah, I'm Lou Ward.

This is my son, Ted.

George Utley. Nice to meet you. The
dog's in the kitchen. I'll go get him.

Hi. Hi, I'm Dick Loudon. I'm Lou Ward.
This is my son, Ted.

Nice to meet you. I guess you were
pretty worried, huh?

Well, you know how boys are about their
dogs.

I guess that's it.

Ted? Yeah, Dad?

It's not your dog.

It's not?

No, it isn't. It's not even close.

You're kidding.

No, I mean, it is a dog, but it's not
Scruffy. See, Scruffy's a

pedigreed Irish setter. But I like him.

No, son, but he's not your dog.

We'll still find Scruffy. We've still
got three more ads to answer.

I don't want Scruffy. I want this dog.

Look, Ted.

Scruffy costs $300.

And we're going to find him.

Okay? Come on. Let's go.

Come on.

Oh, well, thanks a lot for your time.
Oh, don't worry about it.

George, have you given any thought to
what you're going to do, you know?

No one shows up?

No, I haven't.

I just want you to know, if you decide
to keep the dog, you know, it's okay

us.

Oh, thanks, dear.

My phone's out of order.

Haven't you found a no -no for that
thing yet?

No, as a matter of fact...

George, you're talking about keeping the
dog. Well, that's not for sure yet. I'm

just thinking about it.

Maybe I'd better take him out back.

Go ahead.

You know, if you keep that dog around,
he's going to ruin your furniture.

I don't care.

Tell her who's here.

Her husband.

You're Carl?

Yes. How old are you?

I hope Stephanie told you I was coming.

Yes, she told us everything.

Well, not everything.

Would you tell her I'm here?

Oh, sure.

Stephanie!

Oh, thank you. Rumor has it that James
Madison once stayed here.

Carl, is that true?

Nice to meet you.

Is there a place where we can talk?

What's wrong with right here?

You can use my study.

I guess you know I'd like an
explanation.

Oh, Carl.

It always frizzes in the rain.

Stephanie, I'm not talking about your
hair. I'm talking about why you left me.

Oh.

I really do think I have the right to
know why.

It wasn't anything that happened,
really.

I mean, I had fun at the wedding.

Even liked the reception.

The cake was great.

Apparently not great enough.

Stephanie.

I suppose I'm being naive, but... I
assume that you gave our marriage some

thought. We've known each other for
years.

Well, Carl, this is really hard to say,
but... After all, you did come all the

way to Vermont.

looking for me, and you have a right to
know the truth.

And the truth is... Yes?

I don't like the way you dress.

You don't like the way I dress? That's
it.

That's the only reason.

Stephanie, I can always tell when you're
lying.

You can?

Always.

Well, Carl, I'm afraid if I tell you the
real reason that it's going to hurt

you. Please, Stephanie, the truth...

think about my personality.

Am I humorless? Am I too reserved?

Of course not.

It's nothing like that.

Well, am I insensitive? Am I unromantic?

No, believe me, you're fine.

Is it my age?

No.

It's my age.

I wish I was older.

What you're trying to tell me is that
you wish I were younger.

Well, for one thing, if I were, I
wouldn't be handling this with such

I'm sorry, Carl.

So am I, Stephanie.

You know, I didn't expect this to be a
long -term relationship.

But I didn't expect this either.

No, it's just that you had your epiphany
before I thought you would.

You've taught me so much.

but what epiphany means.

That means a sudden realization.

Oh, I get it.

Good.

I'm so grateful for everything.

You know, I always felt safe with you
and protected.

And we did have fun.

You took me to places I never would have
gone to otherwise.

Singapore, Madagascar, bookstores.

you happy here?

Well, I'm in a beautiful setting.

I'm surrounded by people who care about
me.

I have all kinds of opportunities I
never dreamed I'd have.

I guess if a person can't be happy, it's
the next best thing.

My little flower.

I'll always love you, Carl.

And I you.

If nobody claimed the dog by now, they
probably wouldn't.

Well, I guess that means he's yours if
you want him, George.

Well, I don't know. It kind of scares
me. I've never been responsible for

anything before.

That's not true.

You take care of yourself.

You take care of this inn. You take care
of us.

Well, I guess that's true. Maybe what
I'm trying to say is I've never been

responsible for anything that ate off
the floor.

Then you should have a dog.

I think maybe you're right.

Congratulations.

I don't know. I thought about calling
him Biscuit. He loves those.

Or Slipper. He really loves those.

Then again, he spends a lot of time at
the foot of the bed.

Foot of the bed is kind of a long name
for a dog.

I always think a dog should have a
meaningful name. Something that

him. Well, he found you. Maybe you
should call him Lucky.

He is that.

Lucky.

Lucky, I like that. Gee, thanks, Dick.

Come on, Lucky. Let's go downtown and
get you a name tag and me some slippers.

Oh, hi, Stephanie.

Guess what? I'm going to keep the dog.

Oh, that's nice.

Did you say goodbye to Carl?

Yeah. Feeling all right?

I'm a little sad.

Well, if you're ever feeling lonely, you
can always come up to my room and get

lucky.

Lucky is the dog's name.

Oh!

Are you sure you're all right? Yeah.

I want to thank you two for making me
see Carl.

If I hadn't, I think I might have
regretted it for the rest of my life.

Well, you're welcome.

Well, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll
go upstairs in case I decide to cry or

something.

Well, if you're going to watch the front
desk, I think I'll go in the study

and... Watch a game on TV.

Sure, go ahead.

Honey, I think the Putnam's are checking
out.

Meow.