Original subtitles

You're 28 seconds away from going to the city playoffs, and my baby is the

reason why.

He's been collecting triple -doubles like our king collects 40 tiles.

And Daddy's dealership has been racking up double -digit sales ever since they

became the proud sponsors of our Crenshaw Cougars.

Now he's the team's biggest and most embarrassing cheerleader.

He loves anything in blue and gold except my QQ.

Let's go, boys. Let's break some drills. Let's go.

than one riding punk.

There are singers riding punk.

Cowboys got to spin up.

Go, Pookie Ookie. That's right, baby. Keep me real.

Oh, come on, QQ. Do us a dunk, dunk.

You heard my baby. Keep it real.

Oh, way to run the floor, Lawrence.

Girl, Nestle ain't got nothing on that chocolate tartare.

Listen, why are you always in the brothers who need repair?

I'm going to tell you like I tell the boys.

Suit up or shut up. I'll suit up.

When Nike comes out with an Adnesi, then you can suit up.

Meanwhile, keep stats.

Ooh, step on my night o 'clock.

Hi, Vice Principal Mitchell.

Hey, Coach Vines. You can still call me Dee. Hi, Vice Principal Dee.

Still trying to make it to showtime at the Apollo.

Look, Coach, I need to talk to you about three of your players.

Oh, it just wasn't.

Hey, guys, give me some laughs. Hey, and not around the girls.

Coach, I'm going to get right to the point.

Quentin Brooks, Robert Weaver, and Lamar Tyson have all let their grade point

average drop below a 2 .0.

So I'm going to have to put them on academic probation.

Hey, I've been working with these guys.

Quentin's average is up to a 1 .9.

is still below a 2 .0.

What's a D -plus between friends?

I wouldn't know.

But between coaches and vice principals, I'd say you're about three players

short. Dee, we just made the playoffs.

You're talking about three of my starters.

I'm sorry, coach.

District policy.

Not your GPAs.

According to Vice Principal Mitchell, you three are off the team. On the real

culture side, you three are off the team.

Look, I'm going to see what I can do.

But as of right now, that's the way it has to be. Hit the showers.

What was that all about?

His stepmom just cost us the championships.

What?

Free air freshener, free fluid inspection, free oil change.

Wow, that's a good deal.

Good call, son.

All right, let's make that last one $4 .99 off the oil change.

Hey, honey.

Oh, hey, Dee.

Baby,

guess what?

What? Hey, Dee, how are you? Honey, would you like to rest your tired,

feet?

I'm sorry, baby. Hi, how are you? Have a seat.

Keep your shoes on.

All right, guess what? What?

I sold another car today.

Isn't that what car salesmen do?

Yeah, and daddies send their sons to their rooms.

Wait just a sec.

You can cut me out about 200 more basketballs.

Okay. But if one of them say free Saturn, don't blame me.

Frank, I'm really happy for you. Congratulations, baby.

But I got the sale because of this.

Boom!

Front page L .A. sentiment.

Baby, you can't buy that kind of advertisement.

Take a look. They interviewed me.

Honey, this is great.

Did you mention the tutorial program that you all started?

No, I didn't.

See, Dee, you got to sell the sizzle, not the steak.

See, if I started this interview out talking about education, they would have

buried us on page 57.

Frank the Sentinel doesn't have 57 pages.

Anyway, now that the team is in the playoffs, we're going to have customers

running down to the dealership. I wouldn't count on that if I were you.

I mean, half the people in that picture aren't even on the team anymore.

Wait a minute, what are you talking about?

Daddy, Dee didn't tell you?

Three of our star players let their gray slip and Dee kicked them off the team.

You kicked three starters off the team? Frank, honey, let me make it plain for

you. You flunk, no slam dunk.

Baby, I mean, wasn't there something else you could do?

Oh, glad to see that we're on the same page, Daddy. Now keep turning around.

Now, Dee, for the sake of argument, let's look at the player situation.

If they had one more grading period, a mere six weeks, I'm sure they could get

their grades up.

Then they can play in six weeks. But we need them now.

I mean, Q's our top scorer.

Quentin, leave it to that boy to ruin a good thing.

Anyway, I was thinking, instead of kicking them off the team, maybe you can

them, like, write an essay or something. I mean, this is about education, isn't

it? Yeah.

Moesha.

Did you ever find what you were looking for underneath the bleachers today?

I'll shut up now.

You know, I'm just glad to see that we're on the same page.

Dee, I just wish you had talked to me first.

I'll talk with you now, Frank, in the living room.

Excuse us, please.

Frank.

I cannot believe you're second -guessing me like that. I'm not trying to, baby.

I'm just saying that if you... You know, it is bad enough that I have got to

hear this from the students, their parents, and some of the teachers, too.

expect a little bit of support at home.

Well, so do I, Dee.

Baby brother Saturn has invested a lot of money at Crenshaw, which means Dee

Mitchell has invested a lot of money at Crenshaw. No, Dee... Mitchell has

invested a lot making sure that education comes first at Crenshaw.

Oh, well, maybe Deirdre Mitchell should understand that her husband is trying to

build a business.

And maybe Frankenstein Mitchell ought to understand that his wife does not try

and tell him how to sell cars, so maybe he should not try and tell her how to

educate children.

Ha!

Hakeem Campbell think that Frank Mitchell gonna be sleeping on the sofa

No.

Look, I got a way to get you guys back on the team. I knew my shorty would come

through with a plan. What you got? Okay, all you guys gotta do is enroll in my

dad's tutorial program and bring your grades up.

So what we talking about?

Yeah. B -ball footprint show on the map.

Without us, school ain't nothing. Nothing but an educational institution

high academic standards. We can't just ignore grades. Yeah, but I bet the

that's going to kick our butts tomorrow does.

True that. Man, we wouldn't even be here without Tyson Brooks and Weaver. I

think we all just walk off.

That's right. Yes, it will.

Shoot, we are Crenshaw.

How are they going to tell us we can't play?

We need to do this NBA style, put pressure on.

Nobody plays unless we all play.

See,

I was just saying. I got a 3 .2.

See,

that was just the figure of speech.

You would know that if you brought your butt to English.

Now, what I know is there's no way they're going to jeopardize the

championships. The school's got too much riding on it.

Let me get this straight.

We just call in their bluff, right? Exactly.

Look, I'm talking demonstrations, picket signs.

Boycotts. Boy, you wouldn't make it past lunch.

All right, all right, I feel you.

I'm down with the Crenshaw 30.

And then we're going to try the tutorial program because at the end of the day,

we still want an education, right?

Hey, well, why don't y 'all sleep on it and get back to me?

Demonstrating if you just studied.

Or if Mrs. Mitchell just stayed a teacher.

She's been tripping ever since she got that VP gig.

Be honest, boo.

You were a felon before she got that gig.

Yeah, you were a felon.

Did you see this?

While you were out picking him, the coach was holding tryouts. For the

basketball team?

No, for water polo.

He said, if y 'all don't get to practice, you're off the team.

Q, I thought you said coach was about to crack.

Come on, man, he is.

You think he don't embarrass himself with a bunch of scrubs?

Yeah, you right.

I'm just tripping.

Hey, I made it. I made it. I made it, y 'all. I made the basketball team.

You want to see?

Can't, boy.

Yeah, well, neither can you.

With that 1 .95, I'll be starting in one.

I can't believe Coach put Cowboy in my position.

This is like something out of Tales from the Hood.

Well, here comes the creep keeper.

They put a girl on our team?

Man, Coach went circus on us.

Hey, everybody.

Say hello to Crenshaw's newest shooting guard.

Man, this is whack.

Oh, it's whack, huh?

Well, look.

How whack is this?

That's right. That's right. Sizz, baby. Sizz.

Well, that's all right. You know, that's what practice is for. You know what I'm

saying?

Now, get this madness.

Baby, where you going?

Trying to get my uniform back. Oh, you mean this one?

Oh, you might have the uniform, but she will never have me.

Oh, can I get that in writing?

Oh!

Okie -okie, your okie -pokie's coming, baby!

Congratulations, Niecy. Way to represent for them women.

Girl, I'm just trying to get next to Lauren.

Now, come on, Niecy. You promised you were going to teach me how to play

Okay, I'll even spot you a few letters.

Girl, I'm the best player on the team.

You're shorty. This is mad crazy.

You need to talk to your stepmoms.

I've already tried to talk to her. There's nothing that she can do.

Well, she needs to take another look, because a lot of people are going to

a problem with this.

But what you trying to say?

I said what I had to say.

Okay, well, obviously you seem upset right now. Maybe we should take a walk

you can calm down.

Can't be seen in public, remember?

bag and see how fast you can fill it up. We're not going to be recycling that,

are we?

Who would do something like this?

I don't know.

Somebody who buys in bulk?

Yeah, well, I bet that Quentin boy had something to do with it. Oh, Frank, I

don't think so.

He's not that type of boy.

How can you be so sure, Dee?

I guess I can.

I can ask him or I can just go get ready for school.

Hello.

He comes at the job.

Did you do that?

Not my flavor.

Oh, was TP in my house your flavor?

Why are you bringing me this madness?

Because you continue to go around blaming D instead of taking

your own actions.

And all of this so -called madness is hurting my family.

Look, I didn't do nothing, so don't put that on me. But you can stop it. I don't

have any control over nobody.

Your money, can't you see we here talking?

You're boring me.

I'm not listening to any of it. I'm here to see the game.

That's right.

That's right.

Okay,

everybody, gather around.

Now, look.

You may not possess the skills and the talent of real basketball players.

What?

But you certainly learned the playbook faster than any team I've ever coached.

Well, let's get out there and do what you do. All right.

Oh, wait, coach. You haven't told us who starts yet.

Uh, Niecy and whoever else wants to break.

this hits the papers, do you realize how many sympathy sales we're going to get?

Who threw that?

Who threw that?

Who threw it?

It's okay, baby. No, no, no. It is not okay, baby.

Honey, it's okay.

Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. Whoever tripping out there need to kill that.

I mean, chill with that.

Mrs. Mitchell had a job to do.

She did it.

I'm proud of you.

Thank you.

Daddy,

not that bad.

I guess he's not. In a general, you still can't date him sort of way.

Well, this was certainly a breakthrough day.

Q took responsibility for his own actions, and Daddy almost admitted that

human.

Since we're out of the playoffs, Daddy decided to switch his support to the

debate team.

The odds are pretty good that they'll never be put on academic probation.