All language subtitles for Moesha s02e03 Mama Said Knock You Out

I used to think it was impossible to
have so much in common with someone

so different until I met Teresa.

We've been hanging ever since she moved
on the block.

She's one girl who's not afraid to take
risks.

Homegirl is crazy.

She acts first and never thinks about
the consequences.

That's that come from going over five
brothers.

You gotta throw the first bunch, grab
the first drumstick, and you definitely

have to get to the bathroom first.

Tonight, she's taking me to her old
stomping ground, the east side.

Tressa says she knows a club where the
guys are fine and the music pumps are

done. I can't wait because I'm going to
be all up in there.

Well, till midnight.

Actually, until 1130.

Got to factor in it's ride time.

Anybody's name on this waffle? Yeah, the
same name that was on the last seven

you ate.

Oh, so it's mine. No, it's mine.

I was just going to put a little butter
and syrup on it for you, Mr. Mitch. Mm

-hmm.

I'm going to put some teeth in it, too,
Dad.

Oh, Frank, you know, since you're going
to be home today, I need you to pick up

the dry cleaning.

Oh, yeah, and Daddy, I need you to...
Hold it right there, Mo.

I have a very important announcement to
make.

Today is my first day off in six... It
is officially Frank Day, which means

nobody can use the words, Daddy, I need,
pick up, go there, or to do in the same

sentence until this time tomorrow.

Well, Father, my car is not working.

Mo, let me put it to you in a language
that you can understand.

Baby, nobody talks to me unless your
initials are ESPN.

I am going to kick back.

and relax all day today in one spot.

Capisce?

Yeah, Mr. Mitch. You just want to stew
in your own juices.

Yeah. While you're stewing, can you help
me build a volcano for my science

project? Uh, son, what are you doing
studying science when you obviously

understand English?

If I don't get a good grade and don't
get into a good college, don't blame me.

Oh, don't worry. I won't.

It's only if I can toss you in when
we're done.

Miles, look, look, look, man. Scrap the
volcano idea.

Let me drop some mad science on you.

Yeah, man, you know, when I was in the
third grade, I did this crazy fly

experiment. Yeah. Ooh, ooh, let me
demonstrate it for y 'all.

Yeah.

See?

seven years.

Uh, son, I'll take my chances.

Miles, honey, don't you worry about it.
I will help you with your science

project, and you and I will make the
best doggone volcano ever. We will blow

roof off the sucker, okay?

I'll see you all later.

Oh, great.

Last place in the science fair.

Hugging.

Yeah, especially if I ain't here.

Mom, did you get my phone message? Yeah,
all ten of them. Then why didn't you

call me back?

Because I was hanging out late with
Teresa.

Oh, her.

What's that supposed to mean?

I don't know. I just think she's a bad
influence, keeping you out all late. I

mean, look at you. You got bags all up
under your eyes.

Anyway, being that I'm your best friend
and everything, I thought I'd tell you

about Granny's just third annual going
out of business sale. How many times can

Granny do that?

I figured we'd roll by there after
school. I even got gas money.

The only thing is the car's broke down.

Then how will we get into school?

Teresa.

Well, it looks like I'm going to be
power walking again.

Wait a minute, Kim. You don't power
walk.

You don't know what I do. Why? Because
you don't return calls.

a tattoo of my name on his chest, and he
did it.

I can't even get Q to wear a friendship
ring. That's because you asked.

You got to tell a man he loves you.

Love?

Who's in love?

Teresa's boyfriend, and he has the
tattoo to prove it. Trust me, a tattoo

mean a thing, girl. I had a boyfriend,
Jimmy West, had my name tattooed all

his... Anyway.

The blood hadn't dried on the thing
before he said it.

I need more space.

Yeah, and for the rest of that brother's
life, when he look at it, he'll think

of you.

Child, please. He just found him a woman
named Shandell and bought a shh.

Hey, Mo.

Let's bounce.

Yeah, we better hit Granny's cell before
those clothes got a style again.

Mo, we can't go.

We got a French test tomorrow.

I'm not talking to we, Isha. I'm talking
to Mo, Isha.

Sorry, Kim, but we just found out about
this test.

Wait a minute. Aren't you ace in French?

Yeah, but Teresa needs my help.

I thought you said you were bilingual.

Oh, and I thought you said you were
bouncing.

Come on, Ma, let's get out of here.

No, kid, you're running madly. You'll
drop me off at the ball. I can't. I'm

rolling with Teresa.

Teresa, hook me up.

Well, what's going to be my hookup?

You get to roll with the cue.

So crazy?

Let's go, Ma.

Mm -hmm, so crazy.

Next, he'll be so cute, so fine, and so
hers.

Watch. Kim, you so need a life.

So?

Yes, it works!

I told you that we would blow the roof
off the sucker. Come on. All right.

What do you think, Frank? What are you
talking about, baby? That's just an

anthill with backed -up plumbing.

Why you gotta call my volcano like that,
man?

Frank, I think it's cute.

Dee, a volcano's not supposed to be
cute, babe.

A volcano is a scary thing.

See, what we need is a big, ugly, scary
volcano and we're gonna win this fair.

Hey, Mo.

Hey. Hey, baby.

I'm finished with my volcano. What do
you think? Yeah.

It's cute.

See, see?

That's exactly what I'm talking about.
Cute.

How is he supposed to get into a good
Ivy League school with cute?

Frank, if you think that you can do any
better, go right ahead.

No, no, Dee. No?

How did you get in here?

Miles gave me his key.

His what?

I'll be right back.

Kill Jimmy the Cricket later, because
what I'm about to tell you is probably

going to rip your little life apart.

Teresa's trying to steal your man.

Kim, will you squash that?

Teresa's not trying to get cute. She
already has a man.

Oh, sure. She talks about having a man,
but have you ever seen him?

Now, she wouldn't be the first person to
talk about a man she doesn't have, now,

would she?

Well, we ain't talking about Niecy right
now. We're talking about Teresa.

She reminds me of that crazy chick from
that movie, Single White Female.

Kim. For real, though, Mo.

She's starting to dress like you, talk
like you, laugh like you. Next thing you

know, she'll be throwing your puppy out
the window. Kim, I don't have her, but

you got a window.

Kim, you know what?

I would love to sit here and talk crazy
with you, but first, I got a cricket I

gotta crush. Fine, but don't come
running to me when Teresa's wearing

your man on her arm, and your little
rover splattered all over the sidewalk.

Just get out of my room, single black
female.

And I'm not single. Cheney's my man.

Hey!

Sorry I'm late. Have you seen Q? Oh,
I've seen him. F -L -F has him.

F -L -F?

Candleless Latin female. Check it out.

Hey, I love the dress. Don't you?

Kim, they just dancing.

Oh, yeah, they're just dancing, having
fun, not thinking about you. You know,

it's good to have a friend you can share
with.

I wouldn't know.

What's up, shorty? I was just looking
for you.

Don't be mad at him, Moe. He probably
thought he was dancing with you. I mean,

I'm confused just by standing here.

Teresa, why are you trying to push up on
Q?

What?

We were just dancing.

Ain't nothing going over here but the
Macarena.

Look, I'm going to deal with you later,
but don't act like you don't know.

First, you try to dress like me. Then
you try to take French like me. Now

trying to steal my man wetnecks. You're
going to throw my puppy out the window?

Moe, you don't have a puppy. Oh, but I
got me a window.

Mo, I'm not trying to get with Teresa.

That's the real deal, boy.

I know you're not messing with my hyena.
Yo, who is this fool?

Boo?

I'm Teresa's boyfriend, and you better
watch who you're calling a fool before

you get stretched.

Homeboy, let me tell you something, Mr.
Boyfriend.

You step to me when you become her man.

What you saying? I'm not her man? Yeah,
that's what I'm saying.

me and Q.

Oh, yes, there is, and everybody sees
it. Ask Niecy, ask Hakeem.

Hakeem ain't seen nothing.

And I never said anything, all right?
Kim was the one hustling that theory.

What's your problem, Kim?

Why are you always starting stuff?

Look, I wasn't the one wrapped around
most men.

Yeah, well, I've seen you all wrapped
around a three musketeer, but I don't go

around telling people you're dating it.
Okay, okay, okay, break it up, break it

up, break it up. No fighting here, no
fighting. Fine, let's see.

Nobody's taking any whooping anywhere.

Look, I'll tell you girls like I tell
the boys. You want to fight?

Do it in the ring.

Fine. Let's do it now. Let's go.

Hold up. Slow down, Roberta Duran and
Sugar Mae Leonard.

Look, if you two are still mad and you
want to fight after school on Monday,

we'll do it then. Monday is fine.

Give you time to notify your next of
kin.

Come on.

And she was our ride home.

Yeah, that ought to do it.

Come on, let's go.

Frank! Honey, what are you doing with my
plant? Oh, no, no, no, no. This is for

Miles' volcano.

See, we need something for the lava to
burn as it spills into the village.

Got it, though. Zip code.

Come on.

my son into the best college dirt can
buy.

Hey, you want to see it erupt? Let her
rip, son. Uh, just a second.

Goggles.

You two might not want to look directly
into the light.

Like you did Frank.

Well, the two of you can be prepared to
ooh and ah.

Let her rip, son.

Ooh. Ah.

We just seem to have a couple bugs here,
that's all.

I'll get it.

What did you do? What did I do? I didn't
even touch it.

Hey, girl, can you get my note?

Yeah.

My hand?

Apology accepted.

Whoa.

What about the other thing I mentioned?

Sorry, Mo.

The fight's still on.

In fact, I was out doing a little road
work, chasing a few chickens.

I think you're taking this thing too
seriously.

Why do you say that?

I think this thing with you and Kim has
gone too far.

What will it take for you not to fight
her?

Tell her not to show up.

I gotta go.

I got some dead cows to beat up.

Frank, his teacher's never gonna believe
he did this by himself.

What are you talking about? Miles did
most of the work.

He's not lying about that.

Yeah, I just pushed him.

He's really not lying about that.

You ready, son?

Ready, Dad.

Goggles. Yeah.

Hit it.

I only get one day off every six years.

All right, Kim.

Let's get me.

Show me some teeth.

Now, what do we do next?

Kim, Kim.

Show me a left -right combo.

Ooh, left -right combo. That sounds
tasty. Can I get that super fast?

Kim!

Fight like a girl.

Duh, I am a girl. See, I knew you hadn't
noticed.

If you fight like that, you're going to
get stung.

Look, do what you just did, and I'm
going to show you what happened to you.

Come on.

you doing this? Because I don't like
her. You don't even know her, Kim. I

know calculus, but I know I don't like
it either.

Hakeem, will you talk some sense into
her?

I can't even beat her.

But anyways, we got an agreement.

Agreement? Y 'all never agree on
anything.

Well, we did this time, and it's legal.
See?

Got it in writing.

Yep, we agreed that if I trade her, we
get to see other people.

But you two aren't even girlfriend and
boyfriend.

Yeah, I know.

Hey, Mom.

What are you doing here?

I thought you'd be at the big fight.

And I'm not trying to support that mess.

See, look.

It's like Kim's my girl and Teresa's my
girl.

I don't understand why they hate each
other so much.

Oh, so because you like them both,
they're supposed to automatically like

other? Hand out.

I refuse to believe that two people that
I call friends can't call each other

friends. Ma, I can't tell you how much
time I've wasted trying to make my

friends one big happy family. Shoot, my
family ain't one big happy family.

All I'm saying is, I don't want you to
drive yourself crazy trying to be the

mediator. Just be the best friend you
can to both of them.

At different times.

You ever hear me on this?

Yeah, I do.

Gotta go.

Where you going? Stop the fight.

than the recycling bin on your way out.

you

See how foolish fighting is.

They agreed to try to get along.

Who knows? Maybe one day they'll become
friends.

One thing's for sure. If they ever climb
into the ring again, I won't be there.

Homegirl can thump.