All language subtitles for Minder s02e13 A Lot of Bull and a Pat on the Back

Thank you.

Love you like you want me to.

Three whole days?

That's terrific.

How come?

Well, we do get the odd few days
holiday, you know.

Good, yeah. Your last one, long holiday,
flitting from paradise to paradise.

From London to Manchester air shuttle.

I thought you were going to get
transferred from that run.

So did I.

Is she smashing?

No.

I don't often eat lunch.

Well, you will for the next three days.

Will I?

If you want.

I think I might get used to it.

Just got to pop into head office for an
hour later, and I'm free.

This lunch, does it come with afters?

This is Dave.

Quite the reverse.

Things are very slow, Dave. I don't mind
telling you.

Shame. If something don't start
happening soon, I'm going to have to dip

capital. Reggie.

I'm sorry, this reception is playing
havoc with my cash flow.

Point in.

Do what?

That'll be one -fifty, Arthur.

One -fifty?

It's disastrous, isn't it? Oh, and one
for the barman for maybe putting a bit

business all away.

Eh?

I've got a couple of geezers over there
being arsed in after you.

Don't, Piper.

Don't buy much straight away.

Why? Well, maybe you won't want to meet
them or let them know who you are.

Dave, what are you going on about? You
just said you were going to put a bit of

business my way.

I said maybe.

I mean, they don't look like the old
Bill.

But they certainly don't fit in with the
sort of punters we usually get in here.

Can I look now?

Maybe they're creditors.

Creditors? A friendly word when you're
here, that's all.

They sit in by the bandit.

Didn't they say what they wanted with
me?

Don't recognise them, then?

No. I didn't say. I just wanted to know
if you could be contacted here.

And you said yes.

Why not?

Because if they are people I wish to
avoid, for professional reasons, you

understand, you've got to be right in
it, haven't you?

Except if they were some people after
you for less than friendly reasons.

They wouldn't declare themselves.

Almost certainly they know what you look
like.

Clearly they don't. Otherwise they'd be
over here by now.

May have a point there, don't they?

No.

Introduce yourself.

There's no sign of him.

This is where they said.

I understand you two gentlemen wish to
contact Mr. Arthur Daly.

Are you Mr. Daly?

Well, no. That depends.

Depends? Either you're Mr. Daly or
you're not Mr. Daly.

And you are? Mr. Brown.

And this is Mr Smith.

Smith and Brown.

Common names, I'm afraid, but we're just
country folk.

We were looking for someone, and this
man in the pub we were in gave us your

name, said you could be contacted here.

Give it a rest, Charlie, will you?

Most well.

What sort of person were you looking
for?

Someone who could perhaps help us.

Someone like me.

Someone who could arrange repossessions,
right?

Repossession, eh? Car, is it?

Not exactly, no.

For a fee, of course.

Oh, yes, yes, yes, of course. I mean,
that would naturally have to be

dependent on the situation and the
nature of the article to be repossessed

question.

You sound like a lawyer, Mr Daly. No,
no, no.

Just a businessman that likes things
clear, Mr Brown.

We don't wish to haggle, Mr Daly. The
fee we had in mind was £4 ,000.

£4 ,000?

£500 in advance and the rest when the
job's completed.

Yes, yes, I think I might be able to
help you. Let me get you both another

and then we can discuss details.

No, I was just thinking.

I know that.

What a great deaf you've got.

Deaf?

Deaf and dumb.

Bottom.

You're crude.

Ah, but honest.

Crude, but nice.

Well, different.

We can't all be flight captains.

Thank goodness.

I'd better be getting along to head
office.

Hello, lover.

Oh,

bad timing, eh?

Penny,

this is Debbie.

Just a friend.

Just?

What is it? Some sort of a wind -up?

You're convincing, I'll give you that.
Who stuck you into me? Was it Dave

the ramp?

I know, I know, that pub you went into.

Pick and whistle, was it? Jerry Hawley.

He put you up to it.

He's a card, isn't he?

You're not joking, are you?

Yeah, but you don't have to go just yet,
do you?

Well, I said I was going to have a word
with you alone.

Don't worry, Debbie, I'm not leaving on
your account.

I've got to go into town for an hour or
so anyway.

Have a night, Terry.

Yeah, but...

Look, can you hang on a minute? Yeah,
sure.

Peg, Peg, hold up.

What's the matter?

You are coming back, aren't you?

Well, not if you'd rather I didn't.

Don't be silly.

I thought maybe you'd got the... Terry,
you're a free agent.

Whoever you see when you don't see me is
up to you.

She's just an old friend, honestly.

What is she doing?

Artistic posing.

I'll see you.

Come to see, love?

Yeah, why not, yeah?

Sorry about that.

About what?

He's always in the scene up with Come
Fly With Me.

Oh, that's all right.

It's a friend.

We're all just friends, aren't we,
Terry?

No, I am sorry, really.

No, that's all right.

I came round to see if you could help
me, Tell.

Help? Well, there's this bloke who's
been hassling me, you know.

You want me to warn him of, right? Well,
it's not what you think. He's

threatened me.

And one of the other girls at the club.

What do you mean, threatened to hurt
you? Yeah.

He wants me, well, me and my friend, to
go and work as hostesses at a club.

Well, what he calls it, a club.

Hostesses? Well...

There's a clip joint for mud punters.

And the gaff where you work isn't, eh?

I might be a stripper, Terry, but I'm
not a whore.

So, this geezer has threatened you with
physical damage if you and your mate

don't oblige him and go on the game, eh?
Right.

Well, it's strictly illegal, isn't it?

Call in the old Bill.

Get him nicked.

Come on, Terry. You know what it's like
on that scene with all the people

involved. If I call in the old Bill, I
wouldn't last two minutes.

I don't like grasses.

Yeah. I don't like poncies.

Hang on, help me then.

Has he got a name?

Don't know it.

Or what name the clip joint is.

How many times has he fronted you? A
couple, when I've been leaving the club.

Alone? Yeah, my friend works later than
me, usually.

Has he claimed her separately?

Yep.

Well, surely the bloke who runs your
club's got friends who would protect his

interests. Oh, that little twerp. Do you
think he wants any aggravation?

It's not hard to come by and have a
couple of drippers these days, Terry.

How am I supposed to have a chat with
him?

Well, I thought if you could be about
for a few days when I leave the club,

if he shows... What time do you leave?

Only through an afternoon at the moment.

Around six.

I've been too bleeding scared to do the
late -night stint. Too dark and quiet at

three in the morning.

I could pay you, and my girlfriend's
chipping her off. Don't be daft, don't

daft.

We're friends for her.

What are you doing here at this time of
day?

I live here.

No, no, no, you don't live here, Terry.
You sleep here.

Oh,

what's she doing here?

Deb is my tea lady.

No, I'm going to be doing a bit of work
for her. Oh, yeah?

Hello, Arthur.

Hello.

Do I know you? Cool. We met, Randy, once
before when Terry was minicabbing.

Oh, that's right, yeah.

Wasn't quite as warmly dressed then,
though, you know.

Oh, yeah.

Look, I've got a very lucrative job of
work for you, my son, and I don't wish

discuss it in front of a third party, so
could you... There was a guest in my

humble abode. She'll leave when she
wants.

All right, all right. You don't want to
earn 300 sols for a few hours' work?

That's all right by me.

It's all right, Till. I've got to be
going to work anyway.

You got transport?

Well, no.

Well, Arthur will give you a lift. Then
we can discuss whatever in the motor,

can't we? I'll get me jacket.

Help the lady on with her coat.

All right? Yeah.

Thanks again then, Terry.

Bye. See you later.

All right, then.

Who have I got to kill for 300 quid?

No, no, no, it's nothing like that,
Terry. It's a simple repossession job.

Oh, I've told you before, Arthur, I hate
repossession.

Especially if it's done poor work in
Pets Motor.

Now, look, let's go to the Winchester
and have a chat over a drink.

It's not a car that we have got to
repossess.

What is it, then?

A bull.

What? A ball.

Oh.

Terry, a ball is just another bit of
property.

A ball is a live animal, a very big live
animal. I have been assured this is a

totally domesticated beast.

You're having a laugh, aren't you?

No, no, no.

Someone's been winding you up.

A ball. Look, what if I were to put 100
in your hand in reddies up front?

Right now.

All right.

Not here, not here. No, no, here, now.

Now.

All right, all right.

Here you are. Put it away.

I don't believe this.

Well, don't you want to know where,
when?

Oh, sorry.

I was so excited about forming a
relationship with a bull, I forgot all

that.

Where, when?

Tomorrow. The country.

All right, then.

Get me wellies out.

And me cape and sword.

I think suitable rustic attire may be
called for.

I was the exotic and erotic Debbie,
gents.

Let's have a big hand for the girl with
the big ass.

So when's the honeymoon, Maggie?

Oh, my honeymoon.

I thought you really liked this guy. She
was really into him. Uh, Debbie?

Oh, yeah, come on in, Terry.

I thought you was waiting outside.

No, I will be. I'll be in the windy bar,
all right? I just came in to say, if

you see me, don't show out at all.

I'll tag along behind you when you
leave, and if he shows, I'll join you,

Right, OK.

Right. Oh, Terry, this is Maggie.

And this is Phyllis, the other girl I
was telling you about.

This is Terry, ma 'am. Hello, Terry.

You all right, love?

Debbie tells me you're going to be a
white knight in shining armour.

Yeah, I don't know about the armour.

I saw the bastard in the audience again
last night. That's the second time.

Sat right in front, staring right at me.

Oh, significantly. Oh, yeah, I forgot to
tell you about that, Beth.

I think he's seen too many old holdings
of gangster movies.

It don't mean to say he ain't serious,
though, does it?

My sense, ma 'am?

Exactly.

Uh... I'll see you all right. Yeah, all
right. See you.

I didn't touch anyone. No, he pulled me
right outside the club the other three

times.

Sorry for wasting your time, Phil. No,
I'm silly.

Oh, come on. I'll see you home, all
right? No, that's all right.

Don't be dark.

There you go, love.

Oh, aren't you coming in for a bit,
Phil?

Do you want to rephrase that?

No, not really.

Well, no.

No, it's a nice thought, but no, I'm a
bit busy.

Yeah, I get it.

No, straight, I've got things to do.

It's all right, Till. No sweat.

See you tomorrow, then, will I, down the
club? Yeah, absolutely.

Thanks again, then, Till.

You know, they're only glorified
waitresses.

They're not that much different to us.

Still, stripping is an art form that
goes back a long way.

Yeah, really.

It's all a bit sad, really.

What, Debbie stripping or me helping her
out?

Stripping.

No, it is a constant source of curiosity
to me why you choose to earn your

living as you do.

I thought you only liked me because I
was a nice bit of rough trade. You

Don't do that again.

I meet a lot of interesting people.

But it's so unpredictable.

Like your arrivals and departures.

Anyway, it's the only thing I can do.

It's not too late for you to train for
something.

Leave it out.

Now, most of the time, I like it.

Does that include repossessing bulls?

Yeah.

Arthur can be a right loon at times.

Um, Arthur's here.

Wow. Thought you'd like it.

You know the trouble with you, Terry,
you've got no sense of style.

That's what holds you back, my boy.

No sense of image, Terry, image.

Arthur, that gear is ridiculous.

Don't show your ignorance.

What do you know about rural haute
couture? You never set foot outside of

West London.

Look, we're going to collect a bull, not
grouse -suit him. Yeah, these clients

are gentleman farmers, aren't they? I've
got to look the part, haven't I?

Image, Terry, image.

Well, left or right?

Left. No, right.

No, you're right there.

Oh, my God.

Oh, this is a life, Terry. Day in the
country, eh?

Look at them fields.

Look at them hedgerows.

England, my England.

Look at them trees.

British oaks.

That's home.

You don't get none of your cosmopolitan
hyperloid down here. This is where your

real Englishman lives.

Don't tell cobblers, Arthur.

Oh, smell that air.

Clean.

Unferruted.

It's funny. We should have found it by
now.

Found what?

Well, he said there'd be a clearing, a
lorry.

Probably copped a wrong one back at that
junction.

Yeah. I think you're right.

Hold on,

stop him.

I'll give you a push.

Oh, blimey.

Go on, then.

No, no, no, no.

Look, you get out and shove it. I'll get
it out.

Come on. Hey, it's a bit muddy, isn't
it? You're dressed for the country,

you?

You'd put your wellies on like me,
shouldn't you?

Image, Arthur.

Image.

Remember the country code?

Sod the country code.

Arthur, you don't want to go around
littering all this lovely rustic charm,

you?

Yeah, I've been thinking.

Is this business kosher?

Why do you say that?

Well, it's just I've never heard of
bulls being bought on a tally before.

And if they were, it'd be a finance
firm, wouldn't it? And they'd be

for the repossessing, not a couple of
farmers.

They do things differently in the
country, Terry, and they are gentleman

farmers.

They don't schlep around the marketplace
slapping hands to do deals and handing

over the reddies.

Hold up, this looks like it.

Nice here, isn't it?

Who are we meeting? Little Red Riding
Hood? No, the three bears. Now, shut up.

Ah.

What's that?

This tells you where to locate the
animal, Terry.

Here, see? Ball.

We, Arthur. Where we locate the animal.

Funny place to meet, isn't it?

Where are they? No, no, no, no. I'm not
meeting them here.

Eh? Look, stop worrying, Terry. Just
leave all the administrative details to

eh?

This is taking on a distinctly dodgy
quality.

Dodgy? Now, don't be silly, Terry. Look,
I told you they do things differently

in the sticks.

Well, it does seem right to me.

Look, it's all a matter of discretion.

I mean, these gentlemen have to live in
a community.

They have to move among the peasants. It
would not do for them to be seen

connected with a delicate business like
this.

Oh, yeah?

Well, don't just stand there.

Off you go.

Keys are in the lorry.

But you ain't.

I think it's the next on the right.

Here, let me have a look.

Oh, no.

This is ridiculous.

He's got to be around here somewhere.

Right, it's all yours, Terry.

Now, Arthur.

This country air's playing me up, Terry.
I'm not feeling all that. I am not

going to do it alone.

All right.

Come on.

It should have come back a bit more.

What for?

Well, I want a gap there, just in case I
have to get out on the hurry up, but

not big enough for the ball.

No, it's just a precaution. Yeah, I
know. Look.

Oh. You got it?

Yeah, I've got it. Have you got it? No.

It's a bit big, isn't it?

Get out straight, he said.

Like the dog.

Like the pet.

No, no, but it's just because he might
get nervous.

Yeah, well, that'll make for him. What
are you doing?

Come on, Terry.

Come on.

What? Hey.

What is that?

I don't know.

Ooh, like clouds.

Hello, Ferdinand.

Hello, Ferdy.

A Spanish, innit? I don't know. Go on.

Toro Ferdi.

Hello, mate.

Hello. Arthur!

Supposed to be lucky, innit?

Hello, mate.

Bit of breakfast?

Hello.

You're a big boy, ain't you?

Yeah.

Who's a pretty boy, then?

Oh, I say.

Look, nice.

Who's a pretty bully?

You're not a bully, really, are you?
Come here, let's have a sit down, John.

Hold on.

Come here.

Come here.

Whoa,

whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down.

Here's a good boy.

Oh, there. Easy, easy. Take it easy.

Come here, come here.

Here's a good boy.

Look, it's all right, isn't it? Gets a
bit off your nose, but that's all right.

Oh, I've got gold. Come on, son.

Look, look at that. It's everywhere.

You wouldn't be giving me any bullshit,
would you?

Come on, son. Look at that. Come on.
Come on.

Give us that then.

No, I can't.

I'm damaged.

You're a nice old boy, aren't you?

Go, go for a nice ride. Come on.

Up you go. Come on. Up you go. Come on.
It's a nice old... Come on.

Arthur, could you help?

Come on. Here's a good boy. Come on. Up
you go.

Come on. Come on. Look at that. Oops -a
-daisy. Come on.

Here's a good old bully.

Here's a good boy.

There you are. See, I told you. Simple.
Oh, yeah, pretty simple, that one. Stay

there, Phil.

Here's a good old... What are you doing?

Move it.

Mine goes first.

Go on, quick, quick, quick.

Get out there.

Simple.

God, you don't have ten and eight.

Hold on.

What do you mean, meet you in a village?
What village?

Little village about two miles down the
road. I'll get a lift back there. But

first, I've got to deliver our four
-footed friend to the clients.

No, I'll follow you down. No, no.

No, no, no, no, Terry. Now, you've done
your part.

Now, I've got to go and do mine.

If you'll pardon the expression, Arthur,
this is all beginning to smell.

Terry, would I do anything that's
contrary to the letter of the law? Of

not.

Unthinkable. Which is why it's all right
for me to follow you down in a motor.

No, you're wrong. You're wrong.

Do you want to bet?

Mr. Smith, Mr. Brown, your property as
arranged.

Who's that in the car, then?

Oh, that's just my trusted labourer.

No problem, was there, Mr. Daly?

Yeah, I see what you mean.

Tripped, did you?

Slithered, more like.

That's all right, Mr. Daly. We farmers
are used to that smell.

Well, perhaps you'd like to view your
property before we conclude our

Yes, perhaps we'd better have a look.

Well, that all seems satisfactory, Mr.
Daly.

I think you'll find that's in order.

Well, it's been a pleasure doing
business with you, gentlemen.

And ours with you, Mr. Daly.

There is just one thing. You don't
happen to have an old newspaper in the

do you?

Good day's work, Terry. Good day's work.

Was that their farm?

No, no, no, that was just a meeting
place.

Why didn't we take a round to their
farm?

Employees, farm labourers.

When they see us, the word gets down to
rural grapevine, doesn't it?

It's very hard to keep a secret in the
sticks, you know.

What secret?

Once the geezer who had the ball finds
out it's on the missing list, he's going

to know, isn't he? Terry.

Even I can't claim to know all the law
to the countryside.

That's the way they wanted it, that's
the way they got it.

Now stop rabbiting on about it and cop
that.

Take the two you've got coming out of
that and be grateful.

I could have done it on my own, you
know.

Straight down the middle?

Of course straight down the middle.
Would I do it any other way?

On his office?

No, of course not.

Oh, you know I stink.

Well, don't knock it. Where there's
muck, there's money.

That's what they say up north.

Yeah, well, I want to be up west by six,
so put your cloak down.

Debbie? Deb?

Yeah, what?

It's me, Terry.

Oh, tell.

There you go.

Oh, you shouldn't have.

Don't be silly.

I've got a mate with a store.

Bit of a mess, aren't I?

Well, if the Fed is nothing permanent,
you'll be out in about a week.

Yeah, she said.

Trouble is, who's going to feed my cat?

Listen, I'm sorry I didn't get back to
the club. I was stuck in the sticks with

Arthur. Traffic.

It's all right. I know you would have if
you could.

Listen, did he say anything?

No. Just a lot of dirty verbal, then he
beat up on me.

Did he have a motor?

Dunno. He didn't say.

I'll ask Bella to pop in and feed my
cats while I'm in here, Terry.

Yeah, of course I will.

Where is she? Can she get in?

My bag's down there. Key's in it.

Listen. I said, yeah.

Thanks, Till.

Yeah. How's that girlfriend of yours,
Penny?

Still on the ground, is she?

What do you mean it's nothing to do with
you? I don't want no trouble.

Listen, Pigsbread, they're your girls.
They work for you. They're entitled.

I pay them, don't I? Am I responsible
for what happens to them after they

the club?

Look, are you sure you don't know this
ratbag, Ponce? I swear, if I knew

anything I'd tell you, believe me, do us
all a favour.

Look, I'll tell you what I'll do.

You're right about the goose. I should
do something.

You find him, saw him out.

There's a pony in it for you.

A pony, you slag?

No, I'll tell you what you'll do. You'll
make that 200 whether I find a bastard

or not.

Got it?

Got it?

All right, all right. Fair enough, I
suppose.

But one thing you don't tell no one is
down to me.

I've got to conduct a business round
here.

Listen, you've got my number. If you see
that crud at all, you give me a ring,

right? And that goes for you as well.

Anytime you was getting undressed.

I detest ponces.

You haven't got a thing for her, have
you?

No, that's not the point, is it?

Maybe if you led a different
lifestyle... Oh, really, Gag, all right,

know.

Turn out the night though.

What for?

I'm shy.

What time is it? Time you're up.

How do you feel?

Perfect.

We're not going to be long.

Oh, my God.

Congratulations.

You've now graduated to wrestling.

Have you seen that?

Give him a lager.

Have you seen it? How do you think I
feel?

Champion of its breed, a royal show.

They reckon it's worth more than 40
grand.

I should have asked for more.

More? Terry, I have been conned.

I've been conned, you mean? Dave, tell
him, am I upset or am I not upset?

He's upset, Terry.

Upset? We could get Bird for this.
Explain that to him.

Oh, I think it's still on his statute
book. The rustlers can be up. Don't say

things like that, Dave. I'm upset enough
as it is.

Diabolical liberties have been taken
with my trust in nature.

I must be round a bleeding twitch for
standing with it. Terry, Terry, I know

just how you feel. Let it be a lesson to
us all.

Never trust any but your own.

But you knew about it, didn't you?
That's what all the ducking and diving

about. I swear, Terry, I am as shocked
and upset as you are.

The only thing we can do is keep our
fingers crossed.

Fingers crossed? What are you talking
about?

We don't get our collars felled. They'll
still be nicked.

Oh, look, I have been discussing it with
Dave here. Isn't that right, Dave?

That's right, Arthur.

We reckon we're in with plenty of
chance.

Arthur! As long as we keep shtun, just
the three of us, you know?

I mean, the local old bill are not going
to come looking here for rustlers, are

they? In the middle of London, with our
sort of social background.

No, I've got a better idea.

We get it back and return it.

Return it?

The ball? That's right, we back it.

Don't be silly. How can we do that?

It's simple.

We drive down to the country.

We find your two gentlemen farmers, we
collect it and put it back in the field.

And what if someone sees us? The old
place will be seething with village

bent on promotion.

Be like the great train robbery to them.

No, no, no, no. Out of question, Terry.

Next thing you know, you want us to give
the money back. All right, then, we go

to the old bill. We declare everything
we know, right?

We'll explain to them we're victims of a
con.

You can't be serious.

You think the filth is going to take
your word against that of two English

country gentlemen?

You in your form.

He's right, Terry. You'll be eating
porridge before you know it.

All right, then, we'll do it the other
way.

Terry... At least, then, if we get
nicked, we've got a convincing story.

All right, supposing you're right. How
do we find them?

Knock on farmhouse doors and hope
somebody answers?

They probably don't even live on that
manor. He's right, Terry.

Will you stop keep saying he's right?

Now, listen, look, I think I can
remember the number of the roller,

you've got a mate who's straightened on
the pulse, right?

Yeah. Well, he could check it out, get a
few addresses for us, yeah?

I suppose so.

Well, go on, in on the dog.

OK.

This is not a good idea, Terry.

And we're giving that money back.

What? You going potty or something? This
way we don't get involved with a

conspiracy charge if it comes on top. I
can't do that.

I can and I can't afford it, so you
certainly can. Look, Terry, the

alone isn't worth what you've got out of
it. I'm not going back to Nick for a

poxy 300 quid.

Look, Terry, be reasonable.

I mean, even if we get the ball back
without any difficulties, them yoiks are

not going to start screaming for their
money and putting themselves on offer,

are they? I don't care. I'm not taking
any chances with my liberty.

Well, what do you think we're doing now?

And what about all that clobber I
bought? That's got to be paid for, you

That is your genuine out -of -pocket
expenses, Terry.

As you said yourself, Arthur, let this
be a lesson to us all.

Oh, my God, look at this. Nothing but
fields, open spaces.

Exposure is terrible.

That's funny.

Yesterday it was England, my England.

Funny it's not, Terry.

With a dot on the card to be spotted,
I'm telling you. Me and my titty

were a wild animal in possession.

Not a little wild animal, is it?

Who can tell?

Snatched from the security of the field,
it knows it's home. A thing like that

could unbalance his brain, turn it into
a raging wild beast.

Look, let's turn back while we've still
got the chance. No!

Listen. Helicopter.

They're probably scarring the whole
area.

We're a million to get that. Turn it in,
will you?

They've all got estates down here, you
know.

Who have? Crown Court Beaks.

Descendants of Judge Jeffreys.

Judge who?

Jeffreys. Known as the Hanging Judge.

That sort of excessive attitude to
lawbreakers is passed on from generation

generation.

That lot think a plea of mitigation is a
request to go to the toilet.

It'll be the maximum sentence. No mercy.
Stand on me. I will if you don't turn

it in.

Oh, my good God.

It's on top. I knew it.

It's on top.

Arthur, we're still in your car. We
haven't even got the ball yet.

Come on, he's waving you on.

Is he following?

On a pushbike.

Don't let that fool you.

He can radio ahead, put out on all
points.

All that politeness is just to lull you
into false sense of security.

It's the first copper we've seen for
miles.

Don't let that fool you. They're all
around, lurking in the hedgerows, hiding

the hay.

Doodle, doodle.

Just drive.

Daly, what are you doing here?

Ah, we've come to take the bull back.

A misunderstanding.

You made a deal, Mr Daly? Yeah, but as I
say, there's been a bit of a

misunderstanding. You see, we didn't
realise... We didn't know we were

the bull.

Well, that wasn't our impression, Mr
Daly. Oh?

Wasn't it?

Now, which one of you two gentlemen owns
this?

I do.

So you're William Meadows, then, eh?

You're probably wondering how we found
you. You see, my friend Arthur... As a

friend who's got a friend in the force,
see?

The police?

You haven't informed the police, have
you?

No, he hasn't, no.

Not yet.

What do you mean?

Well, the way I see it, there are
several ways to handle this.

Now, the best way is that you give us
back the ball and there's no

Or we call the old bill and let them
sort it out.

There is another way, though.

Slightly unpleasant, I'm afraid.

See, I get this.

Then I start smashing up the roller.
Then when I've worked up enough

I sort you two out. Now, what do you
want?

I don't think that'll be advisable.

You don't, eh?

A lot of big lads about the place.

We've only got to call them.

Well, you'd better start shouting,
sunshine.

Wait a minute.

What about the money? That's better.

There you go.

There's my share.

A bit of a problem there, Terry. I
haven't brought mine. You didn't give me

to nip back and get it.

Mr. Daly, you pay by cheque. No, no, no.
I haven't brought my book.

You've what? Please.

Oh, I could have sworn I left it on
the... Just pay the man, eh?

All of it?

Yeah, all of it.

What about money for exes? Agro money?

Just write out a cheque, right? Your
half.

Here's half my half. 600 quid, OK?

600?

We gave you 4 ,000 pounds.

I was keeping it as a surprise for you.
Next week, your birthday.

I'll take an oath, Terry. You don't know
when my birthday is. Yes, I do. Your

mum told me when I went round.

One day.

Just write a cheque.

How do we know this won't bounce and
you've taken the bull for yourselves?

You don't.

Thank you.

Where is it, then?

Better get loaded up, then.

You know, if there's no bull on the
premises, there's no evidence.

It's worth to stop us ringing the police
once you've gone.

Oh, that's simple.

You're coming with us.

I thought you London spivs didn't mind
what you did for a few pounds.

Spivs? Bit out of date, aren't you?

I suppose we could make it a bit more.

I suppose you could try.

Say, another thousand?

Not interested, Squire.

Anyway, you couldn't have kept it around
here, could you? Somebody'd be bound to

spot it.

I've no intention of keeping it around
here. My colleague has an isolated farm

long way away.

It wouldn't have been difficult.

And I thought all the clever villains
lived in London.

Go on, then. He ain't going to come out
by himself, is he?

Come on. Come on. Come on.

No!

Arthur, you've got to stop doing this.
People are beginning to talk.

Her indoors will kill you.

Terry!

Terry!

He's really the case, your Arthur, isn't
he?

Nah, he's all right.

Just a bit carried away.

Why do you let him get you into these
situations?

I keep asking myself that.

He's just got this way of talking me
into things.

They're not all as loony as that ball
caper.

And it does keep me off the dole.

How about calling me a cab?

All right, you're a cab.

If you're not, don't suppose... What?

No, I don't know.

Go on, what?

Well, I was just wondering. Wondering
what, for goodness sake?

Well, having you here for the last few
days, well,

I just thought, well, it'd be easier
if... I like things the way they are,

Terry.

I like my job, my independence.

And I like you.

Just not ready for that kind of
commitment.

Not yet.

OK?

Yeah, just a thought.

Very nice one, too.

Mary!

Mary! Mary!

All right, all right, mate.

So, what is it with you these days? You
becoming a recluse or something? Hi

there, Arthur.

Oh.

It's all right.

I was just leaving.

Yeah, I've got a job for you. A mate of
mine's opening a drinker over the water

tonight. Thinks it might get a bit
rowdy. There's a pony in it for you.

Keep you off the door. This is true.

Oh, your cab.

Hello, they're ringing you.

Hello?

Yeah.

Oh.

Yeah, don't worry. No, it's all right.
I'll be straight over.

OK, ta -ra.

Listen,

you in a hurry. I need a lift. Why,
where?

It's that other business I was talking
to you about.

What other business?

I'll explain in a moment, all right? Oh.

Ah, your cab. It's OK, I'll do it. You
go on.

I'll ring you next week.

I'll see you then, then.

You'll see me.

I'll see you.

Just keep your seats, gents. The show
will continue shortly.

He's ready to leave.

Permanently. I said I didn't want no
trouble in the club.

There ain't going to be any more
trouble. Now just give us a 200.

Come on.

I'll handle the finances, Terry.
Straight down the middle as always,

Wrong, Arthur.

This is for Debbie.

What you might call compensation money
for industrial injury.

You met Mr. Prucci.

Terry.

Terry, you know, there are times when I
just don't understand you.

And there are times, Arthur, when I do
understand you.

I've changed the situation.

Right people, right time, just the wrong
location.

I've got a good idea.

Just you keep me near. I'll be so good
for you. I could be so good for you.

Love you like you want me to.