Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:27,600
Good morning, Petunia. Good morning.
2
00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:30,740
Where's my wife? Oh, she went shopping
with Larry's wife.
3
00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:32,120
How's Jim feeling?
4
00:00:32,680 --> 00:00:34,800
Not so good. He had a bad night.
5
00:00:35,060 --> 00:00:36,060
Oh, that's a shame.
6
00:00:36,860 --> 00:00:38,540
Ah, nice hotcakes.
7
00:00:38,740 --> 00:00:39,940
Mmm, yummy, yummy.
8
00:00:40,340 --> 00:00:41,340
A little butter.
9
00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:49,460
Oh, some syrup.
10
00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:54,280
Well, well, ketchup, my favorite fruit.
11
00:00:56,780 --> 00:00:58,240
Oh, mustard. My lucky day.
12
00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:07,780
Is that whipped cream?
13
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:13,360
I only had some beer.
14
00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:16,040
Beer with hotcakes? It's delicious.
15
00:01:17,420 --> 00:01:21,280
Say, you know what's funny? None of the
doctors seem to be able to help Shep. My
16
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:24,140
friend Claude can cure Shep like
nothing. He can do anything.
17
00:01:24,670 --> 00:01:27,070
While we were in school, he cured all
the pupils there.
18
00:01:27,270 --> 00:01:28,229
What school?
19
00:01:28,230 --> 00:01:29,230
The reformed schools.
20
00:01:30,450 --> 00:01:33,850
Look, let me show you. I got his card
right here. Listen to me, will you, Mo?
21
00:01:33,890 --> 00:01:35,670
Look. Claude A. Quacker.
22
00:01:35,990 --> 00:01:38,650
LBS, FOB, and UTZ.
23
00:01:39,450 --> 00:01:40,810
Health Restorer and Advisor.
24
00:01:41,530 --> 00:01:44,930
214 East 5th Street. Phone PU3411.
25
00:01:45,210 --> 00:01:47,550
You see, let me go get him. He'll cure
shit like that.
26
00:01:47,770 --> 00:01:49,170
Are you sure? I'm positive.
27
00:01:49,650 --> 00:01:51,130
Only fools are positive.
28
00:01:51,350 --> 00:01:52,650
Are you sure? I'm positive.
29
00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:59,840
Yes? Shepard's got to eat something.
Will you cook this hot cake while I go
30
00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:00,840
get him? Sure.
31
00:02:02,180 --> 00:02:03,180
Hurry back.
32
00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:20,780
I have no appetite.
33
00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:23,120
Eat at least two of those or I'll never
speak to you again.
34
00:02:23,380 --> 00:02:24,480
Okay, but no syrup.
35
00:02:25,390 --> 00:02:26,390
Okay, no syrup.
36
00:02:36,910 --> 00:02:39,010
You know, these cupcakes are delicious
this morning.
37
00:02:39,230 --> 00:02:41,310
They sure are. They're light as a
feather.
38
00:02:42,350 --> 00:02:47,370
Thank you, dear. I didn't think I'd be
hungry today, but I sure am. I told you
39
00:02:47,370 --> 00:02:48,370
so.
40
00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:55,560
Boy, do it all up good.
41
00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,820
You know, Captain Larry's bringing his
friend Claude over here to kill you.
42
00:03:20,820 --> 00:03:21,820
do you say to that?
43
00:03:45,610 --> 00:03:48,450
I mean, how is he, Claude? I gave him
one of these sleeping pills about ten
44
00:03:48,450 --> 00:03:51,710
minutes ago. That's the best thing in
the world for him, rest and sleep. But
45
00:03:51,710 --> 00:03:53,230
don't you think we ought to call a
doctor?
46
00:03:53,470 --> 00:03:54,470
Why throw money away?
47
00:03:54,630 --> 00:03:58,170
I can take care of Shemp better than any
doctor. Sure you can. Just follow the
48
00:03:58,170 --> 00:04:01,730
directions till I get back. I'm going to
get my doctor book. We'll have Shemp as
49
00:04:01,730 --> 00:04:02,489
good as new.
50
00:04:02,490 --> 00:04:03,490
Sure.
51
00:04:03,670 --> 00:04:07,410
Take one pill, wait 15 minutes, then
take a second pill. Hey, it's time for
52
00:04:07,410 --> 00:04:09,310
second pill, 15 minutes. Right, let's
go.
53
00:04:09,710 --> 00:04:10,950
Now, don't worry about everything.
54
00:04:11,550 --> 00:04:12,550
Everything will be all right.
55
00:04:13,330 --> 00:04:14,330
Now, don't worry.
56
00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:24,200
Baby, it's a shame to disturb him. Yeah,
but he's got to take his second pill so
57
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:25,200
he can sleep.
58
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:27,260
Maybe you've got something there.
59
00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:35,580
Okay, kid, we... Come on, come on, come
on, come on, come on. Get up,
60
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:36,600
you've got to take a pill.
61
00:04:36,840 --> 00:04:37,839
What, again?
62
00:04:37,840 --> 00:04:38,840
Yeah, again.
63
00:04:38,900 --> 00:04:39,900
Here.
64
00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:41,120
Come on.
65
00:04:42,180 --> 00:04:43,180
Down the hatch.
66
00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:47,000
Let me get back... Oh, not so fast.
67
00:04:47,230 --> 00:04:48,230
You've got to follow instructions.
68
00:04:48,470 --> 00:04:50,590
Now that you've taken the pill, you've
got to skip an hour.
69
00:04:51,050 --> 00:04:52,050
Get him the rope.
70
00:04:52,790 --> 00:04:53,810
Here, take that.
71
00:04:54,470 --> 00:04:55,470
Now skip.
72
00:04:56,750 --> 00:04:57,930
Hey, hey, hey.
73
00:04:58,610 --> 00:04:59,610
Come on.
74
00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:01,110
Here, one in each hand.
75
00:05:02,090 --> 00:05:03,090
Start skipping.
76
00:05:08,210 --> 00:05:09,009
That's that.
77
00:05:09,010 --> 00:05:10,890
No, no, we'll let you know when the
hour's up.
78
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:25,140
Oh, that's that. Shit!
79
00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:28,780
Cut it out, fella. You're waking me up.
80
00:05:38,060 --> 00:05:39,060
Hey!
81
00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:42,960
What's the big idea?
82
00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:46,780
He's following the instructions on the
bottle. Yeah, it says take two pills and
83
00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:51,080
skip an hour. You dopes. That means to
wait an hour before you give him his
84
00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:55,760
pill. Now he tells us. I've got... My
doctor book right here. I'll have his
85
00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:57,080
diagnosed and nothing flat.
86
00:05:57,300 --> 00:05:58,760
You sit right down there.
87
00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:14,100
Uh -huh.
88
00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:17,580
What is it, Doc? Nothing.
89
00:06:20,260 --> 00:06:21,300
He's got a rash.
90
00:06:21,620 --> 00:06:22,940
It tells you right here.
91
00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:26,680
A rash may be caused by excessive use of
the gray matter of the brain.
92
00:06:26,940 --> 00:06:29,240
Oh, it must be something else. Sure, it
can't be that.
93
00:06:29,500 --> 00:06:32,900
It also says a rash may be caused by a
bad tooth.
94
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:34,860
You got something there. Let's have a
look.
95
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:41,800
Well,
96
00:06:44,100 --> 00:06:45,560
none of them came out yet.
97
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:48,440
Here, open wide.
98
00:07:04,520 --> 00:07:08,000
Get me a piece of strong string. What
are you going to do, Doc? I'm going to
99
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,000
pull that bad, too.
100
00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:11,140
Is it going to height? No, I don't think
so.
101
00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:12,400
Here's the string.
102
00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:14,060
Tie a nice sailor's knot.
103
00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:18,719
Cut it around?
104
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:19,760
Yeah. Fine.
105
00:07:20,580 --> 00:07:21,580
Follow me.
106
00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:29,180
Sit down.
107
00:07:30,980 --> 00:07:31,980
All set?
108
00:07:50,220 --> 00:07:52,780
We'll have that thing out before you can
say Ticonderoga.
109
00:07:53,020 --> 00:07:55,800
If you can say Ticonderoga. All right,
back up just a little bit.
110
00:07:56,580 --> 00:07:57,580
Okay, sonny boy?
111
00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:58,840
All right.
112
00:07:59,660 --> 00:08:06,480
Oh, what a tooth.
113
00:08:06,780 --> 00:08:08,140
No wonder it was killing me.
114
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,420
You nitwit, that's the doorknob.
115
00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:11,700
Oh, yeah?
116
00:08:11,940 --> 00:08:12,940
Come on.
117
00:08:14,100 --> 00:08:15,140
Why, you imbecile.
118
00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:18,060
All we're trying to do is give you a
hand here so you can get out of here.
119
00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:25,960
He shot me. Get a doctor. Do something.
Oh, quiet, Picklepuss. All he did was
120
00:08:25,960 --> 00:08:27,460
pull your tooth. Is that all?
121
00:08:29,340 --> 00:08:31,400
Thanks. I feel like a million bucks.
122
00:08:32,820 --> 00:08:36,860
Easy. You'll soon be a well man,
especially if you go away for a couple
123
00:08:36,860 --> 00:08:37,839
weeks. Yeah.
124
00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,120
We'll go... Wait a minute. We haven't
got a car.
125
00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:41,980
Oh, you lucky people.
126
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:46,480
I've got a car. It isn't exactly brand
new, but it's in perfect condition.
127
00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:49,760
How much? I'll let you steal it from me
for 900 bucks.
128
00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:55,320
And to show you I'm the right guy, I'll
let you have my camping outfit.
129
00:08:55,540 --> 00:08:56,540
I'll bring it over tonight.
130
00:08:56,940 --> 00:08:58,480
That's what you call a real pal.
131
00:08:58,820 --> 00:09:01,780
Yeah, we can camp near a lake and catch
all the fish we can eat.
132
00:09:01,980 --> 00:09:03,980
You know fish is great brain food.
133
00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:05,880
You know you should fish for a whale.
134
00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:07,280
Get out of here.
135
00:09:07,980 --> 00:09:11,020
Hey, Larry, Shem passed out. Get some
water. No champagne.
136
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:12,760
Oh, my God.
137
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:14,280
Shem, Shem.
138
00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:15,600
Oh, hey, Shem.
139
00:09:16,380 --> 00:09:18,680
He's out cold. Run and ask Claude what
we should do.
140
00:09:19,760 --> 00:09:21,750
Oh, kid, I better... Open his clothes.
141
00:09:22,470 --> 00:09:23,530
Give him a little air.
142
00:09:29,570 --> 00:09:32,070
How do you like that? A bulletproof
vest.
143
00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:37,210
Be ready in the jiffy, Sheldon. Tomorrow
we're taking you on a nice camping
144
00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,210
trip.
145
00:09:42,510 --> 00:09:45,270
Oh, live lobsters. Yum, yum, yum.
146
00:09:46,690 --> 00:09:48,510
Tomorrow we sure have a feast.
147
00:09:55,150 --> 00:09:56,610
His veins are getting tight. Come on.
148
00:09:58,790 --> 00:10:00,730
Claude said this will be good to quiet
your nerves.
149
00:10:04,350 --> 00:10:05,350
It's cold.
150
00:10:06,250 --> 00:10:08,750
It's cold. It's cold. Oh, you sissy. Get
in there.
151
00:11:32,430 --> 00:11:33,430
Watch your arm.
152
00:11:34,070 --> 00:11:35,570
How was that? Pretty good.
153
00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:04,940
Next time you come in, knock first and
then don't come in.
154
00:12:49,610 --> 00:12:53,290
who you bought it from, what make is
that? I told you, a Columbus. I thought
155
00:12:53,290 --> 00:12:54,290
came over in a boat.
156
00:13:31,470 --> 00:13:33,030
hissing me for? I'm not hissing you.
157
00:13:33,370 --> 00:13:34,770
But it's not a bad idea.
158
00:13:35,050 --> 00:13:36,050
Boy.
159
00:13:37,450 --> 00:13:39,290
How do you like that? A flat tire.
160
00:13:39,810 --> 00:13:41,830
Get the jack and take the wheel off.
I'll get the spare.
161
00:13:45,370 --> 00:13:46,370
Here.
162
00:13:55,010 --> 00:13:56,010
Stubborn, eh?
163
00:14:00,750 --> 00:14:01,870
Quit monkeying around, you guys.
164
00:14:04,490 --> 00:14:05,490
Oh, careful.
165
00:14:07,330 --> 00:14:11,010
What do we do now?
166
00:14:11,270 --> 00:14:13,010
I wonder how they got the tire on.
167
00:14:16,950 --> 00:14:20,010
What seems to be the trouble? We can't
get the tire past the jack.
168
00:14:20,630 --> 00:14:21,970
Why, you nitwit.
169
00:14:22,890 --> 00:14:24,330
You want to get hurt?
170
00:14:24,550 --> 00:14:25,910
Let a man do it that knows how.
171
00:14:26,110 --> 00:14:27,110
You got to use your brain.
172
00:14:27,730 --> 00:14:29,550
All you do is give it one quick jerk.
173
00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:33,360
Oh, my foot. My foot, it's cut off.
Help.
174
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,840
All right. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
175
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:39,160
That's it. Help me. Take it easy. Take
it easy. Get it out. Push him toward me.
176
00:14:39,300 --> 00:14:40,099
All right.
177
00:14:40,100 --> 00:14:43,020
Is it out yet? Is it out yet? No. Wait a
minute. Hurry. Wait a minute. Oh, here.
178
00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:44,300
Chop it out. Yeah.
179
00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:45,520
Wait a minute.
180
00:14:45,820 --> 00:14:46,820
Oh. Oh.
181
00:14:47,340 --> 00:14:52,140
Oh. Get me out. Oh, my foot. Hold
steady, will you? I'll get you.
182
00:14:54,420 --> 00:14:55,760
Look in the shoe for some toes.
183
00:14:56,340 --> 00:14:57,480
How was it? Pretty heavy?
13411
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof