Original subtitles

What's the idea of kicking me?

I didn't kick you. Somebody kicked me.

You suppose that Putin had kicked us?

How could he? He's sound asleep.

Certainly I'm sound asleep.

How come you're talking?

I'm talking in my sleep.

What's the idea?

What's the matter with you? I never get any rest.

Hurry up and get dressed. We arrive in Hollywood in an hour.

Boy, I can hardly wait.

Will I be a sensation in pictures?

Come on, get breakfast ready, Gable.

You wouldn't hit me like that if I was Gable, would you?

No, like this.

Whoa! Whoa!

You'll be in the boxcar, eh? Get going.

Gee, I sure won't miss this old car.

I wonder who loaned us their furniture without knowing it. The cops get us,

you'll find out. Hurry up with that breakfast now.

the best when I get to Hollywood.

How are we going to get in pictures?

We know nothing about movies.

There's a couple of thousand people in pictures now who know nothing about it.

Three more won't make any difference.

Besides, with my ideas, I'll revolutionize the business.

Hey, fellas, ain't I getting to look more and more like Barrymore?

Kiss me, my Caliban.

Hey, Frank, get up.

You, porcupine.

Come on, press my pants.

I want to look at the berries when I go into the movies.

Hurry up.

It feels great to be clean.

Hey, did you see a wheat cake?

Don't tell me you lost it. Yeah, I had it in the pan. I flipped it up and it

never came down.

Oh, there it is.

You can have it. I'll make another.

No, I think you better take it.

Oh, well, I'll make another. Get out! Get out!

What's the matter?

They're swell.

Put them over my arm. Oh, you like them, eh? Yeah.

What'd you do to my pants? Nothing. I gave them a good present.

Oh, yeah. So you did.

Yeah. Good present.

I'm sorry, Mr. Rapp. I forgot about this wire.

It came last night after you left.

In accordance with our new policy, we are sending you Mr. Smith and his two

assistants, who will take complete charge of the studio. Stop.

You will be under their orders and are to give them your complete cooperation

everything they may wish to do. Stop.

They will arrive tomorrow at 2 o 'clock. You idiot. You nearly got me into a

fine mess.

Sorry, sir. Tomorrow at 2 o 'clock?

That means today.

Go and prepare an office and see that they have everything they may possibly

want. Yes, sir. I'll order three bond secretaries. Yes.

Gee, that guy was tough.

Let's try this one. I don't see any watchmen around.

Hey, hey, hey!

Now beat it and don't try to get in here again.

Boy, this picture business is tougher to get into than I figured.

Don't worry.

A bad beginning is a good ending.

Certainly. If at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking till you do

Now we gotta get into the studio by hook or crook.

Say, you remember how we got in a circus last winter?

He's got it. That'll work.

You said it. Come on.

Say, I'm from the newspapers. Would you mind posing for a photograph?

Why, sure.

Thanks. Now look up at the top of the building.

And shade your eyes with your right hand.

That's fine. Now raise your right leg.

Hold it.

That's swell. That's beautiful. Swell.

Don't move now.

What are you doing? Waiting for a newspaper ad? Why, I'm... It's those

guys. Watch that gate.

It's about time those New York executives arrived. Have you heard from

sir. Not yet.

Well, here we are.

Oh, well, I show these guys how to make pictures.

Gentlemen!

Welcome to Hollywood.

I've been expecting you.

Welcome. Welcome.

I've received my instructions from New York. Gentlemen, the studio is yours.

And I shall do everything within my power to help you make better pictures.

How did you enjoy your trip across the continent?

All the comforts of home.

Pinch me. I think I'm dreaming. Shut up. Act important.

Dear Santa Claus.

Will you join us in a toast?

I don't like toast. That black stuff gets in my teeth.

Come on, I'll gouge your eyes out. Come on.

A little toast to your success.

Oh, sody pop.

Think you can get it open? No, anyhow, I used to be a corker.

Camera. Oh, Marie, you may go.

Come in.

Oh, my darling.

Sweetheart.

At last, they're doing it right.

I've dreamed of the day that we could fly away from here together.

Hiya, fellas. Is this swiney set?

Hmm.

What? The very idea.

What is the meaning of all this?

Who are you?

Hiya, Ted.

I'll explain the whole thing.

Do you mind if I continue?

It's all right with me, but let's get going.

Action. All right, darling.

Sweetheart.

Cut, cut, cut.

You ain't shooting the picture right. Buddy, what's the matter with it?

no action.

It was no good from the first kiss.

Kiss? What do you know about kisses?

Tell him what we know about kisses.

That's enough.

Now, stick around and learn something.

Come here, Chutz.

You watch me.

That's sort of the hit -and -run type. No, that's not what he wants.

Watch this.

See? It's a sort of a stone base idea.

That ain't it.

With me, it's a sacrifice.

Oh, Mr.

Howard.

Easy,

easy. Say, he's passing out.

Yes. Tell me your name, kid, so I can tell your mother.

My mother knows my name.

What do you think you are?

All right, now, show these puppets how to put action behind their words.

Get yourself all set now.

Come, Lance.

Oh, my darling.

Sweetheart.

Oh, will you look at that, swiney?

The name is Spineheart, please.

Yeah.

I've dreamed of the day that we could fly away from here together.

Oh, I bet you tell that to all the girls.

No! Quiet, Joe. Just the actions. No words.

Go ahead.

Oh, but alas, we cannot.

I have no money.

Oh, darling, money doesn't mean everything.

Is that a scene, pig heart?

Swine! Swine!

Yeah, swine, pig, it's all the same.

Swine heart, pig heart, pig heart, heart burn, who cares?

We'll make it like that.

I quit!

You can't quit.

And why not?

Because you're fired. You can't fire him. Why not?

He quit!

Get out!

Citizen, how are we going to finish this picture?

Now, don't worry about that.

I'll direct the thing myself.

Well, you can count me out.

One. Two, three, and four is ten. The winner.

You're out.

I'm through.

Well, you can get a new face for me. I'm through with this nonsense.

Now, where are we going to get a new face for her?

I got it.

The face from the barroom floor.

Pick out two fingers.

One, two.

Is that a sin?

Darling, I have come for you.

Sweetheart, come with me and fly away.

Oh, not that.

You're breaking my heart.

Please, darling, please.

Oh, colossal. Terrific.

Man, that was great. When the boss sees that scene, well, he go nuts.

Here's the wire, sir.

Oh, thanks.

Smith plane grounded. Account of fog. Stop.

Will not arrive until tomorrow. Regards, Burton Fisk, President.

Well, those three executives won't arrive until... Oh, say, who are those

three guys?

I don't know, sir.

Call that Gateman. Get all the Gateman. Come on.

nothing to this picture racket.

We'll show these Hollywood guys how to make pictures. Certainly.

What do we do now?

Think of something.

Come on, use your head.

I threw them out once, boss.

So did I. And they tried to crash my gate, too. Well, you'll have a chance to

throw them out again.

I think our genius didn't appreciate it here.

Let's scram.

hide in here.

Hurry up and lock the door.

Oh, they'll never find us. Certainly we're safe in here.

Just like in our mother's arms.

What are you growling about?

I didn't growl. Not me.