Original subtitles

Read between the lines. There are a lot of nuts out there, Mr. Simon.

Yeah, and they all seem to have your address.

Tonight on Simon and Simon.

Let's not disturb the nest. Just wait and see who comes out.

Satisfy yourself, but just don't do anything terribly cruel.

I'm sorry, our menage a trois suite is booked. You guys are really hard up.

We on the air?

Yeah, it's coming in loud and clear.

Dear Kate, I'm at the end of my rope.

I love her beyond belief, yet I know that our love can only end in tragedy.

Today she told her husband about our affair.

How cruel irony is.

They met at the same golf course where we spent so many happy hours.

He went insane, just like I told you, Kate.

And now I'm afraid for my dear one's life.

Her husband threatened to kill her.

He will, too.

Must I watch helplessly?

Signed, Lovesick in La Jolla.

Mm -hmm.

I

didn't

think you would do it. I honestly didn't think you would do it. Hey, Jim, will

you just relax on an hour?

You're going to be center court, munching on a hot dog, watching Dr.

J. Just calm down. It's just a basketball game. Well, with town,

anything. Remember just a few beers and a movie last month? Hey, was it town's

fault he spotted a wanted fugitive in the lobby buying jawbreakers? Okay, how

about just a quick stop on the way to the Chargers game? I mean, did you know

that Mexico was on the way to the stadium? Okay, but you've got to admit,

always gets good seats.

Yeah, trouble is, by the time you get to the game, the season is over.

Well, nothing's going to go wrong tonight. I bought it in an extra hour.

Good. Must be in place.

Nothing's going to go wrong.

He's working.

Police! Hold it right where you are.

I said police!

Back off.

Hey, there's a phone over there if you want to call the cops. I am a cop.

And there are more cops on their way right this minute.

Okay.

Look, my backup's a little late. Raise your right hand.

Are you joking?

Raise your right hand. Come on, man.

Repeat after me. We're deputies. We're deputies.

We're deputies. Okay, which one do you want?

All of them. All of them? Oh, my God. You have the right to remain silent.

Looks like I got everything under control here. Yeah? Yeah.

So, you guys been off the streets lately?

A little much? Well, not anymore.

Got a case today.

Really hot. Start running tomorrow.

As a matter of fact, there's a well -known journalist.

You ever hear of Kate's Corner?

Kate Franklin Advice to the Lovelorn? No.

You guys are really hard up.

Why, you know.

The whole department does.

She heads our cry wolf list.

Every time some poor wife writes she's afraid of her husband, Kate wants to

the SWAT team on the guy.

Overactive imagination.

Well, we'll only miss the first half. Say what?

We've got to go downtown and finish the paperwork.

Paperwork? Wait a sec.

Yeah, your deputies. Wait, we're not getting paid for this.

Of course you are. I'm taking you to the game, aren't I? Aw.

That's all.

Well, it could be, because that thing is highly illegal.

Illegal? Uh, no.

What? No, no. Now, Carlos is just waiting for the license. But you know

backlogged the FCC is?

Mrs. Franklin, when you said that you had already been to the police, you

neglected to mention that that was 57 times.

So they told you I had an overactive imagination.

Well, they did mention something about a necktie strangler who turned out to be

a harmless high school biology teacher.

Well, what was I to think? The man mentions dissection in at least 50

A leering reference to spore division.

He was a ticking time bomb.

We're not questioning your credibility, Mrs. Franklin. It's just that perhaps

you're reading more into the situation than actually exists.

Exactly. Read between the lines and hear the cries for help. I have spent 20

years climbing this mountain, and with each step I find new crevices, deeper,

darker corners of the troubled soul.

There are a lot of nuts out there, Mr. Simon.

Yeah, and they all seem to have your address.

Well, they're a bright moment.

You remember the plumber who walled up his wife in Chula Vista?

Mike Collum tore that wall down.

They're reconciled living in a trailer in Lake Havasu City.

You're not married, are you?

Me?

No, no, ma 'am. Yeah, I knew it.

You sure could use a woman's eye picking out your clothes. Those colors are all

wrong for you.

Have somebody I want you to meet. Make a wonderful wife.

How about you?

No, thanks. I'm already married.

Here are the clips and the issues the letters appeared in.

One more thing. When these letters come in, are they...

Published just as they're written, or do you, shall we say, edit them?

Look, I know how to grab a headline when I need one.

I'm a responsible journalist.

Sigma Delta Chi.

Okay. I feel as guilty as lovesick.

I let this thing get out of hand.

I should have advised him to end the affair right away.

But instead you milked it, and now you're afraid it turned sour.

Now that we know we're all bottom liners, could we get to work?

Find the man who did this?

See if he's telling the truth.

Is the husband crazy enough to commit murder?

Here you go.

Thanks.

Doesn't look like anything Kate has right. There really is something weird

on here.

Yeah, and we're the mules she's using to ride up some loony's fantasy mountain.

Now look, everything that the guy writes indicates that he's insane with love,

he's flamed with guilt.

And he's scared to death. Wonderful. He'd make a great Johnny Cash. But why

we have to work?

Each of the letters has been methodically typed and very carefully

Now, does the guy who's waiting to be shot worry about his spelling?

Maybe he's an English major.

The guy reads like a textbook gigolo.

Met her on the golf course.

Played her like a par three.

I mean, he's let himself be whined and dined. She's bought him clothes. She's

taken him to exclusive little Mexican hideaways.

And we've got a great skeleton here. There's no meat on the bone.

Here's a little rib to know on.

She bought him, and I quote, a new Italian sports car for my birthday last

Tears were in my eyes as we rode up the coast and parked on the lonely beach

with the top down so we could watch the stars.

Oh, I think I'm going to be sick.

I can't believe there's seven people, including a nut, who own Ferraris. Well,

that's La Jolla for you.

Here's something.

Mrs. Gavin Shelley, I read address.

Personalized license plate, my guy, seven.

Wrong place.

Kind of looks like we found both of them.

Try a little room service?

Ah, you know what kind of movies they show in these places.

Nobody's allowed in after the first ten minutes.

Let's not disturb the nest. Just wait and see who comes out.

Oh, no. Oh, no what?

Who is your favorite retired minor league pitcher turned sleazeball? Five

eye.

Manny Cucco.

Would you know it?

Ricky, what a surprise.

Manny, how's the platter?

Good enough to brush you back, Cecil.

Are we on the job here, or just waiting for vacancy?

Who are you working for, Manny?

Funny, I was just going to ask you the same thing.

Great minds run in the same gutter.

It's been nice looking at your toys. We've got to run. We've got to fish on

line. Funny. I've got a couple on the line, too.

See you, man.

I think we can be yours.

Make yourselves comfortable, guys.

We're going for a ride.

Just what he's doing.

Keeping punks like you from trying to blackmail me.

Just how much did you think you were going to get anyway, huh?

much would you like me to take that golf now look look mr shelby if you don't

believe us why don't you just go on down to the paper and check it out kate

franklin's been leading her column with that story for over a month besides we

weren't in that motel with your wife why lean on us because at last count i was

worth a little over 18 million and i'm gonna keep it you understand my wife is

38 and very dear to me we have an open marriage

And I want her to enjoy it.

Including having her fill of muscle -bound bunnies.

You see, I have no illusions.

Only my money and my good name. And you two clowns aren't getting either.

Move the truck, Cuco.

And tell my wife I can't play golf today.

You know what I'm going to do?

I'm going to find those papers you were talking about. And my lawyer and I are

going to read them. And then he's going to give me ten ways to break your backs.

Legally.

Perfectly awful, man. My instincts were right on the button.

Well, I mean, Gavin Shelley is a tough, vulgar, blustering nut, but that doesn't

necessarily mean he's a killer.

I mean, after all, he hired someone to watch his wife cheat on him and keep

prying eyes away.

He doesn't care what she does.

Can't believe he's threatening her.

We can't just drop it.

No, we'll talk to Stephen Lacey.

We waited at his place for two hours. He never showed up.

We'll get him tomorrow.

Maybe he's just writing you letters for laughs.

I don't think so.

Anybody else want another cup of coffee?

No, thank you.

Rick, next time you make it, try putting a little salt in it.

Salt? Didn't your wife ever teach you that little trick? My wife? No.

No. See, because my wife doesn't drink coffee.

Maybe use a little less water.

I think it gives it a richer flavor.

Fine.

Hello?

Yeah, just one minute, please.

It's for you, Kate, your editor.

Hello?

Why is it you never ask for a second cup of my coffee?

God almighty.

Laurel Shelley is dead.

They've arrested her husband for killing her.

Well, whatever they wanted, they sure wanted it bad.

Who found it? The city editor. About 8 .30. He reported it, but I wanted you to

see it first.

Kate, we don't want to touch anything until the police get here.

Now, is there anything that a thief might have been after?

Nothing worth taking.

Just my files and... Oh, sometimes people send me little things, you know,

thank me.

It's nothing, really.

Okay.

It's possible this has something to do with Laurel Shelley's murder.

You remember I said the lovesick killer is innocent?

I mean, Gavin Shelley is innocent.

You don't murder your wife after you know the whole city's following the

in the newspaper.

And the guy's smarter than that.

He's been set up.

And whoever did it probably wanted something in here.

What?

Well... We don't know, but we'll find out. I wonder how they got in here right

under the noses of the night shift.

Probably the same way we do.

I forgot.

I'm sorry.

Honest to God.

Forgot what, Manny?

It's your blank.

Fill it in. I'm good for it.

Satisfy yourself, but just don't do anything terribly cruel.

Us? Cruel, Manny?

You're the one that travels around with a potato peeler.

As in the old days.

What are you two comadrejas doing in my bedroom?

Easy.

That bat's irreplaceable.

That is the very bat I used to bang a low slide out of the park off Mongo de

Stasica. We took the pennant from Duluth 72.

Someday, Manny, if you can still swallow, which I doubt, we'll buy you a

beer and you will tell us the story of your life. Right now, however, you're

going to tell us why you trashed Kate Franklin's office.

Me? Why would I do that?

Don't ask us, Manny. You're the one who did it.

Hey, Rick, come on now. Look, Manny's going to cooperate. Look, just be

with that thing. You can crush a man's skull with one of those.

Yeah, I know.

Rick, I think maybe it's a little too late to be civilized about this, you

Hey, what do you mean too late?

It's only noon.

Well, one.

You know, this bat has a very good feel to it.

Yeah.

It's a real long ball bat.

Take it easy now, Rick. Take it easy.

AJ.

I got that old weird feeling coming over me again. I know. I think I'm going to

do it. No, come on. No, Rick. Rick. No, no, no.

Manny, when he gets like this, I can't stop him. Come on, please.

I'm telling you the truth.

I am no longer on the case.

After Shelly talked to you, I quit.

It started to get tricky.

I've been here all night.

Manning didn't get out of bed all night.

Not a hunch. That's one of the Ten Commandments.

Only got one more man in the lineup.

It's Eve Lacey.

Of course Calvin Shelley killed her. And the guy is a schizophrenic monster.

I've noticed what happened for months.

Why didn't you stop seeing her?

We were in love.

Why didn't she leave her husband?

She was terrified of him.

Afraid to stay, afraid to go.

We were so desperate, we... You're going to laugh at this.

We wrote to one of those advice -to -the -lovelorn columns in the newspaper.

Kate Franklin?

All she could do was offer us platitudes.

I don't know what we expected.

You told all this to the police?

Yeah, they seemed to know.

I mean, I signed all the letters.

Love, Dick and La Jolla.

I guess the pattern was obvious.

Yeah, I read those.

You wrote that Shelly threatened her. Now, were these actual physical threats

from Shelly?

Yeah, I don't know whether you've met the man.

But all he has to do is arch his eyebrows and it's a threat.

I'd say he snapped her neck like a chicken bone.

I bet you he enjoyed it.

Sergeant Brian, look, I'm going to be deeply undercover for the rest of the

afternoon. Yeah, that's right.

Oh, and Brian, would you call the racket club and tell them I'm going to be a

few minutes late?

Thanks a lot.

Corruption, misfeasance, malfeasance. Can't trust anybody these days.

Look at this. Playing tennis on the taxpayer's money. How do you do that

clear conscience?

I don't.

It's not a perfect world.

Guilt's the thing you learn to live with.

Are you going to get out of my way? I'm talking mixed doubles. Absolutely.

First of all, I need a favor.

You're rich, you hear? Of course you need a favor.

Unfortunately, though, I've got all the life insurance I need, or as an

encyclopedist. Cute.

It's Gavin Shelley.

Get me in to see him.

I can't do that. I don't have anything to do with that case.

You're quite right. You're a disinterested third party, plus which,

here and argue with me, you're going to lose your court.

Look, man, I'm not Houdini. I just can't snap my fingers and doors open. No,

you're a cop.

Infinitely better.

Come on, town. How often do I ask?

Rick, I got you into the Point Loma submarine, Pence.

I got you into the Willie Nelson concert. About the only thing I haven't

you into around here is the mayor's office.

No, he did that, too. Remember the explosion?

Oh, that's right.

I'd actually tried to blot that out of my mind.

All I need is half an hour.

Fifteen. No, no.

Ten minutes. Ten minutes? That's right.

Left if you can manage it. Oh, come on, town. Now, just relax. Nobody's even

going to look at me twice.

The judge would.

His instructions were crystal clear.

Absolutely no business except his lawyers.

Now, nobody notices lawyers. People actually try not to notice lawyers.

kind of like, uh, laws.

Judge is going to enjoy hearing your theory on jurisprudence.

I'm not having to twist your arm real hard.

You don't think Shelly did it, do you?

Why is it you always know when I agree with you?

Forget.

Why are you here?

Because you didn't do it?

The way you put that, you must know something.

People, they're not neat.

But the frame around you was hung with a carpenter's level.

If Kate Franklin hadn't hired us, the picture would be perfect. You'd take the

fall.

What's it to you?

Well, last night, somebody went through her office like a 7 .7 quake. They were

looking for something, and it wasn't her file on my husband likes to wear dog

suit letters.

Whoever framed you doesn't think their work is done.

If we can figure out why, we can figure out who, and you can walk out of here.

I thought it was obvious.

Stephen Lacey, you wrote the letters.

What's he got to gain?

I'm out of the way.

Yeah.

But she's dead.

I am the resurrection and the life, saith the Lord.

He that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live.

And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.

For as much as it hath pleased Almighty God to take unto himself the soul of our

friend Laurel Shelley, we commit her body to the grave, earth to earth, ashes

ashes, dust to dust, in the sure and certain hope that as she has borne the

image of the earthly, she shall also bear the image of the heavenly.

It's Melissa Shelley.

Shelley's daughter by a previous marriage.

How old is she?

Uh, 20 years old.

Let's see.

She's a junior at Rutledge College. It's a private school up north. She came

down for the funeral.

Hmm. She looks pretty upset.

Uh, a little too upset.

Well, I overheard some of the relatives. They weren't buying her performance.

And Laura Shelley was her stepmother.

Hmm.

Oh, hi, Kate. How you doing?

Hold on.

Just hold on. Let me get AJ over here.

I finally got around to yesterday's mail. There's another letter here from

Lovesick in La Jolla.

I mean, Stephen Lacey.

It's postmarked two days ago.

Anything new?

A lot of it sounds like what he wrote before.

The end of my rope, the tragedy.

But there's this one part about a golf game.

He says that Gavin and Laurel played golf that day.

Wait a second. He postponed that game. He never went. Are you sure it's

postmarked the day she died?

Yes. How do you explain that?

Maybe Stephen Lacey can.

Lacey, Big Swan died.

Anybody see it?

You mean anybody give him a hand out the window?

We don't know.

Pretty big guy to handle.

I only know it wasn't Shelly this time.

Still a guest of the city.

Maybe he died of a broken heart.

Among other things.

Up here.

Proofs I know it's in the typewriter.

Can't go on living without Laurel? Same typeface as the letters to Kate.

Guy his age.

Physical fitness freak.

I don't know, it's just... It's kind of hard to believe you'd want to bounce the

body off the sidewalk like that.

Yeah, there was no sign of a struggle.

It would take a real big dude to overpower him and throw him off the

Besides, the door was locked.

There's no bolt on the inside, Town.

Somebody's going to slam that on their way out.

There's nothing here that doesn't say he just didn't take a short walk off the

balcony.

Hey, guys? Yeah?

Take a look at this.

Here you go.

Why would a guy who's planning to walk off his own balcony leave his video

recorder on to tape an old movie?

Because he wasn't going to be here to watch it live?

What did I tell you?

Arnold, you haven't told us anything yet.

I haven't? Not yet.

Why not?

It's right here, everything we need.

The suicide note and the letter from Mr.

Sticklove. Whoever wrote these letters, he didn't write the suicide note.

How can you tell that?

Look.

You see?

Everything typed on the same machine. Always the same correcting electric.

but always in the letters.

Under the microscope, you see M

and N's perverted.

Perverted? Yes.

He mixes up his M's and N's, this person hitting one when should be hitting the

other, so they go backwards.

Then... Ping! He makes a correction.

But under the microscope, the evidence from the mistake always remains on

like a fingerprint.

But in the suicide note, no such evidence.

No.

Which proves that he was murdered.

By a giant.

And the only giant in this case is in jail.

It's from the Del Playa out on Vista Point.

In the Kate Franklin Traveler's Guide, it's known as a three -star resort hotel

with a one -star restaurant. Very exclusive.

Very expensive, I would imagine, for an aerobics instructor.

Yeah, well, we ought to check it out. There's a whole bunch of these in his

medicine cabinet.

Looks like he was spending some rather serious time out there.

Wouldn't surprise me. The Del Playa's known as a safe playground for the rich.

Laurel Shelley probably took Stephen there for private roping sessions, if

know what I mean.

Okay.

Making an Eldo convertible as well?

Yeah.

Now, stand with us.

Ah, excuse me. Yes?

No? Let me guess.

Two rooms connecting doors.

No. I'm sorry, our Ménage à Trois Suites is booked till Christmas.

We don't want the Ménage à Trois Suites.

I don't blame you.

That crack will cost you half a star, pal.

We're private investigators, and we're looking for...

We're

looking for information on this man.

Uh, yes.

He used to come here quite regularly with his wife.

Very beautiful young woman, very tall, long blonde hair.

Long blonde hair?

Like this?

Ah, yes, that's her.

Thank you.

Maybe she duped Lacey into killing her stepmother and framing her father.

Is that possible?

Possible, yes, but it still doesn't tell us who killed Stephen Lacey.

Come out, come out, wherever you are.

It is just that we would feel more comfortable if we knew that you were

with Mom.

It's very unfair of you to impose on your mother this way. No, you have to

understand, we're not imposing.

Really, truly. I mean, we do this all the time.

Yeah, Mom's used to it.

You should read the letters for mothers who feel their children take unfair

advantage. Unfair advantage, yes. Don't be ridiculous.

This one mother wrote her children were always in trouble, calling her up in the

middle of the night to have bailed her sons out of jail, embarrassing her in

front of her men, Fred. Well, yeah, but I mean, you know, it's... I know that's

not you. What'd you tell her to do?

I told her to let them rot in the slammer next time, teach them a lesson.

Sorry to hear that.

Of course, didn't do any good that they just moved here from Guatemala. She was

the only one who spoke English.

Yeah, well, here, right this way.

I'm sorry.

Twenty minutes.

Mom, it's Kate Franklin. Kate, this is our mom. How do you do?

I was just chat -targeting your sons. We're imposing on you like this. Oh,

be silly. I'll be the toast of the Canasta Club.

Hi, Mom.

Hi, Uncle.

Dr.

Luckowitz, please.

Dr. Luckowitz, please pick up your page.

Marlowe? Marlowe!

Marlowe!

Marlowe, come here.

Marlowe, come here.

Come on, boy. Come on, boy.

You okay?

Huh?

Geez, for a minute there, I thought you were on your way to that big kennel in

the sky home.

My home is gone.

Well, AJ, look at it this way.

We're getting Bond to get rid of that lousy oil painting he had over there.

Thank God you weren't in here and nobody was hurt. Oh, Mom, we're okay. We're

okay. Hey, hey, come here.

It's all right.

It's all right.

It's all right.

AJ?

It had to be radio control. I bet this beeper set it off.

Remind me to write the good doctor a thank you note.

I think it's time we dropped the

case. No, no way.

Someone is going to be very, very sorry about all this.

I could never forgive myself if anything happened to the two of you. I don't

want anyone else hurt.

No, no, Kate, you don't understand.

See, we couldn't drop the case now if we wanted to.

They're bringing the action to us because we're...

Too close to them already.

None of that is safe till we make it safe.

But if I... I haven't meddled in the case in the first place, none of this

have happened. Kate, lots of people manage to get murdered every year in

country without your help.

I've been meddling in other people's business all my life.

Now look.

I... Come on, come on.

Come on.

Kate? I want you to listen to me. Hey, will you listen to me?

Okay? All right.

Look, an awful lot of people in this world who are desperate for help.

And most of them don't know where to turn or who to talk to.

And you help those people.

You do.

Because you like listening to them. You like listening to their problems.

You try to understand them.

You put a little...

A little common sense back in their lives.

On top of which, anybody who's willing to take on the awesome responsibility of

turning A .J. into a happily married, well -dressed man deserves a place in

things of all fame. That's all there is to it.

I must admit, I hate to see A .J. lonely.

He is lonely, Kate, believe me.

Lonely and restless and young.

It's disgusting.

There's a decorator I know. Really? Oh, she's a lovely woman.

AJ would love her.

And she could do terrific things with this room.

Would you all mind if we talked about murder instead of love for a little bit?

think I'd feel more comfortable.

Don't mind him. He gets testy when his house gets blown up. Happens every time.

Hello. What do you got?

Well, what are we doing? It's a receipt signed by Melissa and dated for the day

that Laurel Shelley was killed.

Huh? It's kind of smudged, though. I mean, the only thing I can read is the

or not.

Yeah.

Can't tell what she bought or where she bought it.

I can fix that.

Hold on.

I hope you took good notes at Chaucer today.

The wives' tale, wasn't it? You must have nodded off again. We did the wives'

tale yesterday.

Yeah, it's coming in loud and clear.

Bobby, I just can't do that.

But Allison, I love you.

Bobby, I love you too, but I can't break it off with Billy. It would kill him

after all he's gone through this year.

You could break it off with Max.

Max has had a great year. Max and I have a strictly physical relationship and it

shouldn't bother you at all.

What about Norman?

You think you could break it off with Norman?

No. You could move in with me.

How's it going?

Well, so far I've heard plans for the weekend.

Fights with Mommy and Daddy.

Plato versus Aristotle.

A really interesting conversation lasting about 45 minutes concerning Mick

Jagger's lips, but so far no messages from Melissa.

No, no campus either.

I checked her car. It's clean.

You listen for a while. I got to take a break.

Aha.

Now we're getting into your surveillance specialty.

Looking through binoculars into a sorority house.

All in the cause of truth, justice, and the American way.

Hey, listen to this.

What about Norman?

I don't care about Norman, you know that.

I could never love Norman.

So how come you go to bed with him and not with me? Because I love you, that's

why. You won't even let me kiss you. Bobby, I can't talk about it now.

Joey's coming over to help me with my chemistry.

Joey? Joey?

Joey who?

Joey's just a friend.

Well, the town says that Melissa was supposedly on campus when both murders

committed. Of course, up until now, nobody's had any reason to check out her

alibi because we all knew we were looking for a large, powerful man.

We had this kind of thing together.

The three of you?

You don't have to make it sound so dirty.

No, I didn't mean that. I'm just surprised.

Don't mind extra crispy.

Listen to this.

Melissa got a call while you were out.

Why have you been avoiding me?

I've been very busy, and I haven't had time to do anything but study.

You're trying to break it off, aren't you?

No, I'm not, but I think it would be a good idea if we didn't see each other

a while, all things considered.

get there about uh five o 'clock yep oh by the way i talked to uh marjorie she

came through for us melissa bought a new voltage regulator the day laurel shelly

was killed she bought it in san diego hello

i'd like to know where you two got this melissa i think you're missing the point

here you were in san diego the day your stepmother was killed you don't have an

alibi anymore

You are now facing a possible homicide charge.

The fact that I was in San Diego doesn't make me a murderer.

The fact that you lied to the police proves that you have something to hide.

I wasn't hiding anything.

I was trying to protect our family name.

My mother's dead. Now, why should people have all this to drag through the mud?

Kate Franklin would love to write a story on a mother -daughter love

We're talking about a triangle, all right, but it's got nothing to do with

You don't understand.

Why don't you help us out?

I was in San Diego.

But I never killed anyone.

Stephen Lacey killed my stepmother, then tried to blackmail me.

Wally Luger then killed Stephen.

Wally's the one you want.

You liar!

Hold it! Get out of the way!

I appreciate the help, but I can do my own redecorating. Thank you.

Perhaps you should consider taking your big brother's advice, AJ.

After all, he is more experienced in these matters.

Domestically speaking.

You're right.

You're absolutely right.

You know, I think it's high time that you met Rick. Why? How about it, Rick?

When are you going to introduce her to the little woman?

Rick's wife? What are you talking about?

Oh, Rick, I really would love to meet her.

Come to think of it, so would I.

I'll arrange a little soiree.

I've someone very special in mind for you, A .J. Oh, perfectly delightful

lady. Very pretty, too, in spite of her appearance.

I've even lined up someone for Cecilia.

She's a bit older than you are, dear, but still quite vigorous, all things

considered.

I told him all about you.

You might have to bring his nurse, though.

How many does that make?