Original subtitles

BOY: Floy! Wait for me!

(THEME TUNE MASKS DIALOGUE)

Mr Towlinson.

Thank you, Miss Nipper.

-(GIGGLES) - Susan!

Oh'. Sorry , Miss Hey.

Excuse me.

I have the honour to address Miss Dombey, I believe?

- Yes. - My name is Carker.

I can hardly hope to be remembered by Miss Dombey except by name. Carker.

I'm sure I've heard my father speak of you.

I beg pardon a thousand times for the intrusion

but I'm going down tomorrow morning to Mr Dombey at Leamington

and if Miss Dombey can entrust me with any commission,

need I say how very happy I shall be?

I am much obliged to you, Mr Carker.

If you could tell Papa that I've been invited to spend a week or two

with Sir Barnet and Lady Skettles at Fulham.

As you can see, I'm going there now.

Anything else, Miss Dombey?

If you would be so kind as to give Papa my dear love.

With pleasure. Your servant, Miss Dombey.

There is no news of the ship.

SUSAN: Miss Floy!

Miss Floy, the coachman's ready.

Is anything the matter?

What?

No, Susan. Nothing.

(MUMBLES)

(MUMBLING) Oh, avast there!

(\NHEEZES AND MUMBLES) What's... What's amiss?

If you please, sir, I'm Rob that works in Mr Gills' shop.

- He's... - Steady, me lad.

Don't you dare speak a word to me as yet. (COUGHS)

(INHALES DEEPLY)

(EXHALES)

Now, lad...

(COUGHS) ..heave ahead.

Eh?

- Oh, you mean tell ya? - Aye.

Well, sir, I ain't got much to tell.

But look 'ere. And look 'ere.

When I woke this morning, Captain, I found these on my pillow.

Shop door was unbolted and Mr Gills gone.

Er...g...g...gone?

- Flowed, sir. - Eh...?

Upon me word and honour, I don't know any more about it.

"For Captain Cuttle" is on the keys.

And on the pocket, too.

'Ere's a situation for a lad that's just got a situation.

(MUTTERS ANGRILY)

"My dear Ned Cuttle.

Enclosed is my...will...

...and testament."

W...Where's the testament?

What have you done with the testament?

I never see it. I never touched the testament.

Don't keep suspecting an innocent lad, Captain.

"Last will and testament...

...which don't open for a year,

or until you have news of my dear Walter.

If you should never hear of me or see me more,

remember an old friend kindly, but make no inquiry for me.

It is useless.

Your true friend, Solomon Gills."

(GASPING INTAKE OF BREATH)

Oh, don't, Captain!

I wonder how you can.

What have I done to be looked at like that?

Lad, don't you sing out afore you're hurt

Don't you commit yourself, whatever you do.

I ain't been and committed nothing, Captain.

Keep free, then, and ride easy.

If you please, Captain, what's to become of me?

Eh?

Of my situation?

The shop will need minding.

I shall be the new Captain, that's what I'll do.

I'll quit this berth and change ships.

- But what of her? - Her, Captain?

Her downstairs. Mrs MacStinger. She wouldn't hear of it.

She'd keelhaul me for deserting.

Aye, but I'll fox her.

Under cover of darkness, I'll slip me berth and steal away.

Aye, that's what I'll do.

But if she ever gets wind of where I'm at,

if she ever comes after me..

Sunk, lad.

I'll be sunk and 50 fathoms deep.

Your most humble servant, sir.

Damn it, sir, a friend of my friend Dombey is a friend of mine.

I am infinitely obliged, Carker,

to Major Bagstock for his company and conversation.

Major Bagstock has rendered me great service, Carker.

I thank you, Major, for the improvement in Mr Dombey's looks and spirits.

By gad, sir, there are no thanks due to me. (CHUCKLES)

But when my friend Dombey talks to you of Major Bagstock,

I must crave leave to set him and you right.

He means, sir, plain Joe. Joey B. Josh.

Bagstock, Joseph. Rough and tough old Joe, sir, at your service. Wine!

You will join us, Carker? Achair.

Fill it to the brim, you scoundrel.

Give a glass to Mr Carker.

Fill Mr Dombey.

Gentlemen, let us consecrate this glass...

...to a divinity whom Joe is proud to know.

And at a distance, humbly and reverently to admire.

Her name is Edith. Angelic Edith.

By all means.

- Edith. - Edith.

And now, sir, you and Dombey

have the devil's own amount of business to talk over.

We shall meet at dinner time.

In the interval, old Joe will make himself scarce, eh, Dombey?

Have you any further message to them?

A message?

Er...my compliments.

By the Lord, you must make it warmer than that, or old Joe will be far from welcome.

W...What you will, then, Major.

Our friend is sly, sir, sly, sir, devilish sly.

Dombey, I envy your feelings. God bless you.

Door!

I perceive that you go into society here. I'm so very glad.

Of all the men I know,

you are the best adapted, by nature and by position, for society.

I've been frequently amazed that you should have held it at arm's length for so long.

I've had my reasons, Carker.

I've been alone, and indifferent to it.

But you have great social qualifications yourself.

Oh, I? I don't come into comparison with you.

Well, I shall have the pleasure to present you to my... to the Major's friends.

You're very kind.

Highly agreeable people.

Ladies among them, I presume?

They are all... That is to say, they are both ladies.

Sisters, perhaps?

(CLEARS THROAT)

Mother and daughter.

I shall be delighted to meet them.

Speaking of daughters, I have seen Miss Dombey.

She is spending some time with Sir Barnet Skettles at Fulham.

I am asked to be the bearer of her dear love.

What business intelligence is there?

What insupportable creature is this? Go away, whoever you are.

(GASPS) I cannot bear it.

You've not the head to banish JB, ma'am?

Oh, it's you, is it? Well, on second thoughts, you may enter.

A-ha. Jaldi!

But don't come too near,

for I'm frightfully faint and sensitive this morning.

And you smell of the sun. (GIGGLES)

You're positively tropical!

(MOCK GROWL AND CHUCKLE)

How is Mr Dombey?

Dombey, ma'am, is as well as a man in his condition can be.

He's touched, ma'am, is Dombey. He's bayonetted through the body.

Major, do I sense an allusion to Edith, to my exceedingly dear child?

Bluntness, ma'am, has ever been a characteristic of the Bagstock breed.

You are right. Joe admits it.

- And Mr Dombey? - Bayonetted, ma'am.

- He has confided in you? - No, not confided.

- Oh. - But Joe sees. A-ha!

His Royal Highness, the late Duke of York, observed of Joey,

at a levee that he saw.

(CHUCKLES)

And no, ma'am, not confided, for Dombey is as proud as Lucifer.

Oh, a charming quality, reminding one of dearest Edith.

- She... -(CLEARS THROAT)

Oh, dear Miss Edith. Are you going out?

Yes, for a walk.

Major Bagstock, my dear Edith,

who's generally, as you know, the most useful and disagreeable person...

My dear Mama, it is surely not worthwhile to observe these forms of speech.

We are quite alone. We know each other.

-Indeed, ma'am. - My darling child.

- Not "woman" yet? - Oh.

How very odd she is today.

Dombey, ma'am, presents his compliments,

and begs that you will ride with him to Warwick Castle tomorrow morning...

Ohhh.

...and afterwards, do him the honour of dining with him.

Edith...will you go?

Yes. Why shouldn't I?

Ahhh. I knew you would, my own.

Mr Dombey's letter, ma'am.

Thank you. I have no desire to read it.

Then perhaps I had better answer it myself.

- Shall I send your regards, Edith? - What you will, Mama.

(BRANCHES RUSTLING)

Let me tell you your fortune, my pretty lady.

I can tell it for myself.

Aye, aye. But you can't tell it true.

Give me a piece of silver and I'll tell it true.

There's riches in your face, pretty lady.

I know. I knew it before.

What?

You won't give me nothing to tell your fortune?

How much would you give me not to tell it?

Give me something or I'll call it after you!

Hold your peace and be off with you. Be off, do you hear?

You give me something, or I will call it after her.

Or worse, I'll call it after you.

After me, old lady?

Well...what do you know?

Can you tell me who the lady is?

One child dead.

The other child living.

One wife dead.

One wife coming.

- Go and meet her. - What?

Go and meet her! Ha-ha-ha.

(CACKLES)

(CACKLING CONTINUES)

Dinner will be ready in no time, Captain Cuttle, almost as soon as you are.

Is there something special I might cook for you?

Er...no, ma'am. I'll have whatever suits you.

Well, a nice, small kidney pudding, p'r'aps. Or a sheep's head.

- Don't mind my trouble. - No, thank you, ma'am.

'Ere...have a roast fowl.

With a nice little bit of weal stuffing.

And some egg sauce.

Come on, Captain, give yourself a little treat.

No, thank you, ma'am.

Oh, I say, I'm sure you're out of sods, you know. You want stimulating.

(ensues)

Why not 'ave, for once in a way, a bottle of sherry wine?

I...l think I might try that, ma'am.

If you'd be so good as to take a glass or two yourself.

And would you do me the favour, ma'am, to accept a quarter's rent ahead?

Eh? Why so, Captain Cuttle?

It... It would oblige me. I can't keep my money very well.

It pays itself out. I'd take it kindly if you'd comply.

Oh. Well...it's, er...

You must do as you please.

I mean, it's, er... it's not for me, with my family, to refuse, really.

No more than it is to ask.

Er...would you be so good, ma'am, as to, er...

offer 18 pence apiece to the little family all round?

...I should be obliged, ma'am. - Oh!

Well, I, er... It's a great kindness on your pad, Captain Cuttle.

Yes, well, I'll, erm...go and see to cooking your dinner.

Oh, thank 'ee, er...thank you, ma'am.

Why, today of all days, is she as mild and good-tempered as a lamb?

It's enough to tear at a man's conscience. But it must be done.

(STAMPS FOOT)

Leave her get downstairs, then off with you to the shop.

Keep watch there till you hear me knock.

It'll be after midnight, perhaps.

Whatever time it is, turn to and show yourself smart with the door.

- I'll be sorted to it, Captain. - There may be a chase.

She might take me while I was awaiting if you didn't show yourself smart

I'll be at hand, Captain.

And if she ever comes to the shop after me, you might say you never heard of me

but that you read in a paper that a captain of my name was gone to Australia,

emigrating, along with a whole ship's complement of people,

that had all swore never to come back no more.

Don't worry. I'll take care, Captain.

-(DOOR SHUTS) - She's gone.

Off with you, back to your moorings.

And show yourself smart with the door, or I'm hanged for abandoning ship. Off you!

Falsest of false friends, how do you do?

Mrs Skewton, let me gratify my friend, Mr Carker, by presenting him to you.

Ohh, charmed, I'm sure.

- Mrs Granger. - How do you do?

I'm obliged to the gentleman for sparing me some annoyance from a beggar yesterday.

I am obliged to my good fortune

for the opportunity of rendering so slight a service

to one whose servant I am proud to be.

(MRS SKEWTON GIGGLES) Really? Oh!

This is one of the most enchanting coincidences I ever heard of.

There is such an obvious destiny in it

that, really, one might be induced to cross one's arms upon one's frock

and say with those wicked Turks, "There is no whatsisname but thingummy

and whatchamacallit is his prophet!"

It gives me great pleasure that a gentleman

as closely connected with myself as Carker is

should have the honour and happiness

of rendering the least assistance to Mrs Granger.

Shall we be seated?

By the Lord, sir, it seems an extraordinary thing to me

that no one can have the honour and happiness

of shooting all beggars through the head without being brought to book for it.

But here's an arm for Mrs Granger, should she ever need it.

I thought Warwick Castle so charming.

Don't you dote on the Middle Ages, Mr Carker?

- Yes, I do. Very much. - Such charming times.

- You have been to Warwick often, I think. - Several times.

Then today's visit must have been tedious for you, I'm afraid.

Not at all.

Oh, yes, those darling bygone times, Mr Carker,

with their delicious fortresses and their dear old dungeons

and their delightful places of torture.

Everything that made life worth living.

Ohh, how dreadfully we have degenerated.

Yes, we have fallen off deplorably.

Tomorrow morning?

I'm sure I shall be most pleased to see you.

I hope you dote on Harry the Eighth?

I do admire him very much.

So bluff, so burly, so truly English.

(GIGGLES) And those dear little peepy eyes of his,

and that benevolent chin...

- Edith, my dearest love. - Yes, Mama?

Mr Dombey has a piano. I'm sure he's dying to hear you.

Mr Dombey has life enough left to say so for himself, Mama.

I shall be immensely obliged.

Damn it, sir, old Joe has half a mind to propose

that this hotel be named in the future, The Two Jolly Bachelors,

in honour of ourselves.

(CHUCKLES)

(PIANO PLAYS GENTLY)

I have requested Mrs Granger's permission

to call on her tomorrow morning for a purpose.

May I hope to have the pleasure of finding you at home afterwards?

(FLUSTERED WHIMPERING)

- Bought. -(CHUCKLES) "Bought"?

That is the word I used and that is what I am. He has bought me.

Or he will. Tomorrow.

He has considered of his bargain.

He's shown it to his friend.

He's even rather proud of it.

He thinks it may be had sufficiently cheap and he will buy tomorrow.

God, that I should have lived for this.

And that I feel it.

What do you mean?

- Haven't you, from a child... - Child? When was I a child?

What childhood did you ever leave to me?

I was a woman laying snares for men before I knew myself or you.

Or even understood the aim of every new display I learnt.

We have been making every effort to secure you a good establishment.

That has been your life. And now you have got it.

For ten years you have made me a byword among all kinds of men.

- I have? - I have been hawked and vended

around half the places of resort upon the map of England until I loathe myself.

But they all rejected me because you were too plain with your cunning.

-"Cunning"! - Thanks to you, we've come to be notorious.

Edith!

How can you speak like that... to your own mother?

($055)

Listen to me.

He makes this purchase of his own will

and I hope it may never disappoint him.

But I did not tempt this man on.

"This man"?

You talk as if you hated him.

Did you think I loved him?

There is one man who already knows us thoroughly.

I've seen it in his eyes and...

I am degraded by his knowledge of me. And of you.

If you mean that poor Mr Carker,

his opinion is not likely to have much effect on your establishment.

Oh, Edith. What is the matter with you tonight?

Are you ill?

"In"?

Yes.

Yes, I am ill.

Miss Florence.

Why, Susan. What has happened to our house?

For Mr Dombey. For Miss Dombey.

-(BARKING) - Thank you, sir.

Mr Toots! You're here?

Susan, we're hardly home and we have a visitor.

I see him, Miss Floy. And a deal more besides.

Yes. Yes, indeed.

Mr Toots, I'm glad to see you.

How do you do, Miss Dombey? Thank you. I'm very well indeed.

I see Diogenes is well.

I er... I hope you are the same?

You're very kind.

Thank you. It's of no consequence.

Won't you step into the drawing room?

It's of no consequence.

Good morning.

- But... - No consequence.

-(CLATTERING) -(SHE SCREAMS)

Good morning.

(WOMEN LAUGH)

Miss Floy, what's been 'appening 'ere? I should like to know.

I've no idea. I scarcely know what to think.

-(\NOMAN SCREAMS) - Papa!

- You're here? - Oh, Lord have mercy.

- Florence, how do you do? - How do you do, Papa?

What dog is that?

It's a dog, Papa...from Brighton.

Well...

He's very good-natured. Please excuse him.

Mrs Skewton, this is my daughter, Florence.

Charming, I'm sure. So natural.

Florence, my darling, you must kiss me, if you please.

Edith, this is my daughter, Florence.

Florence, this lady will soon be your mama.

What? She...

Oh, Papa!

May you be very happy. May you be very, very happy all your life.

Thank you, Florence.

Your sentiments do you credit.

Shall we go on through the other rooms and see how our workmen are doing?

Pray allow me, madam.

($055)

MRS SKEWTON: Edith, my dear. Come along. We are here, my love.

Florence, you will not begin by hating me?

By hating you...Mama?

Begin by thinking well of me.

Begin by believing that I will try to make you happy.

MRS SKEWTON: Edith!

Don't stay here now.