All language subtitles for benson_s05e02_human_element

Thank you.

Hello? Uh, Governor, I've got a problem.

Have you seen Miss Cross?

Yeah, but that's another problem.

Well, I mean, she's supposed to bring me
my lunch. I'm starving.

So what's up?

Uh, well, the budget.

specifically that section dealing with
the school system. Now, we're about 22%.

Oh, excuse me just a second. Come in.
That must be my sandwich.

Gentlemen. Oh, I see you ordered turkey.

Governor, this awaits your signature.

Thank you. Have you seen Miss Krause? I
heard something clumping down the hall.

Benson, by the way, I have yet to
receive my copy of the new state budget.

There's a good reason for that. I
haven't finished it yet.

It's due before the legislature within
the week. What's holding you up? What's

holding me up is I'm trying to find
enough money to run our schools this

It's a perfectly simple solution,
Benson.

Find some waste and eliminate it. I'm
going to miss you, Clayton.

We're going to need even more money in
the future if people are having children

again. Yes, as opposed to puppies and
kittens.

I mean, there's a baby boom. We're going
to have more children to educate.

Well, I know if I had children, they'd
be in private school.

Clayton, if you had children, they'd be
in Ripley's Believe It or Not.

Here's your lunch, Governor.

Thank you, Miss Clark. Uh, sir, I still
need that signature.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. I was here
first.

Governor, our problem is that the
student population is shifting and our

are underutilized. Well, this is
terrible.

I know.

There isn't any tomato in this sandwich.

That I didn't know.

Sorry, Governor.

Just that I had my heart set on a BLT.
This is really only a BL.

When you get right down to it, it's the
tea that makes this sandwich what it is.

You're absolutely right, sir. Of course,
that is assuming you can find decent

tomatoes. There's nothing wrong with my
tomatoes.

I'm going to pass up this golden
opportunity.

Right, let's get back to business. I'll
get you another sandwich, Governor.

Guess what, guess what? Hey, goodness,
wait!

Governor, how would you like to have a
robot?

I'd rather have a tomato.

No, no, no, this is the Jessamine
Industries mobile microprocessor.

It's called Jim.

I just read about that. It's the most
sophisticated computerized robot ever

produced. We've got him for a whole
month. I thought it would be a good

publicity idea for the State Science
Expo.

Oh, I don't know, Pete. What exactly
does this robot do?

Yeah, does he take meetings?

No, he can do anything. He's even
programmed to do kitchen stuff.

Forget it, Buster. The machine has not
been invented that can replace me.

What about a dump truck?

I'm telling you one wrong beep from this
talking toaster and I'll pull its plug.

I'm getting back to the subject. So the
robot is okay with you, Governor? All

right, Pete. Go ahead, Senator.

Oh, great.

Now, getting back to the subject... Yes,
sir, I still need the signature.

What is it? I've got to get something to
eat. I'll be right back.

Sir... I don't know why I put up with
this. There are people in the private

sector who are begging for my services.

And they're willing to pay me what I'm
worth.

Yeah, sure they are.

And who can live on that kind of money?

in one minute and 20 seconds.

You do something to your hair again,
Kraus?

I am not the biochemical unit Kraus. I
am Jim, Jessamine Industries' mobile

microprocessor. Well, I'm pleased to
meet you. I'm Benson.

I am pleased to make your acquaintance.

Enchanté.

C 'est mon plaisir aussi.

Oh, you speak French, too.

Actually, I speak 16 languages and 41
dialects, not counting machine

Coffee's ready.

Ah, good morning, Krauss. Goodbye,
Benson.

I'm off.

I hope it was something I said.

My leaving has nothing to do with you.

You don't mind if I take the credit?

The reason I am leaving, dear friend, is
because Jim did all my work for me.

He's the best helper I ever had. Thank
you, Miss Krause. Oh, no, no.

Thanks to you, I am free to take the
morning off and go to the zoo.

Homesick?

Now I'm leaving because of you. Good.
For a moment there, I thought I'd lost

touch.

Auf Wiedersehen, Jim.

That's very impressive, Jim, but I
imagine you must have a lot of trouble

your neck.

Occasionally, I crack a ball socket.

Oh, that must be very painful.

How do you work, anyway? What are all
these gadgets? Warning, warning. Do not

touch my input device.

If you don't want your input device
touched, Jim, you shouldn't be flashing

Hi, Katie.

Do we still have a date this afternoon?

Affirmative, Katie.

Jim's going to help me figure out which
access method to use on my new database

program. Oh, I see you two speak the
same language.

For sure.

For sure.

That's just great. A valley robot.

See you guys later. Okay.

school budget from data processing this
morning. Let's have a look. As you can

see, it's divided by school districts.

Yeah, but the machine went off the
bottom of the page. I can't tell what

total is. Oh, that's okay. I can add it
up.

$331 ,680 ,419.

And 36 cents.

Shame you two can't have children.

Jim, you're terrific. You do everything
but play the piano.

Hop on my platform, Denise. We can
boogie.

Thank

you,

Jim. Jim. Oh, Benson, get this.

What is the square root of 754 ,000
divided by 20?

The answer is 194 .16487.

He's been right all morning.

Just can't trip him up.

Governor, I still need to speak with you
on that school budget proposal.

I can't, Benson. I'm on my way to the
Capitol.

Well, what about over lunch? No, I got
to talk at the Rotary, but leave the

proposal on my desk and I'll look at it
later. All right, I'll leave the

afternoon open for you. But before I
go...

Jim, in 1975, what state had the
greatest number of milk cows?

Wisconsin. 1 ,812 ,000.

You try it, Benson.

Name them.

I'm not sure I understand this, Jim. How
do you come to this conclusion?

Given the aforementioned variables, I
project the present situation will

itself for a minimum of eight weeks.

So you really think the White Sox are
going to take it all?

Governor, can you spare some time now?

Our discussion is concluded.

You may enter.

Thank you.

Sure, Benson, go on in. Jim and I were
just talking baseball. He knows

everything.

It's only natural. My creator is a
sports enthusiast and fitness expert.

Yeah, well, I bet my creator can beat up
your creator.

What did you want to discuss, Benson?

Well, Governor, I'm still having some
trouble solving the problems in the

budget. I'm afraid we're going to have
to have an extension before we go to

legislature. Extension?

Benson, we are down to the wire as it
is. Come Monday, the state's going to be

without a budget.

I know, but I don't want to make any
hasty decisions.

Well, you know, I have reviewed most of
your budget data with Jim here. He could

be of help to you. Well, maybe so, but
this is more than facts and figures.

Well, all right, I'll call Senator
Chaplin about the extension.

Okay, and I'll keep plugging away at the
budget.

But you know, Benson, you really
shouldn't resist using Jim.

He's the shape of things to come.

Well, if so, they're going to have to
start making bigger hats.

Benson, I cannot believe that you still
haven't completed work on the school

budget. Thank you for dropping in,
Clayton. Goodbye.

A delay like this could be very costly
to the governor.

Are you going to get out of my office or
do I have to call an exorcist?

All right, Benson.

Well,

it certainly took you long enough.

I've repaired your sanitation unit.

Oh, this is terrific, the three of you
together.

Listen, I want to take some publicity
shots. I have a better idea. Take a

Come on, this robot's the best idea I've
had all year. Now give me a break.

I don't have time, Pete. I'll take
candid shots.

I've got work to do.

Yeah, uh -uh, work, which should have
been done a long time ago. In fact, if

were doing it, I'm sure it would have
been done.

Actually, he could probably do the
entire budget director's job more

efficiently. Isn't that right, Jim?

Based on a comparative performance
capabilities study between a human and

adjustment industry's mobile
microprocessor, that is a logical

Jim, you're beginning to get on my
nerves.

Jim, could you lean in and put your arm
around Benson?

Okay, that's it. Pete, you and the ten
men get out of here and take the Wizard

of Oz with you.

It really is amazing how some people are
so threatened by technology.

Tell me about it. Come on, Jim, let's go
where we're wanted.

Oh, Jim, there you are. I've been
looking all over for you. Oh, Governor,

you talk to Senator Chapman about that
extension?

Yes, he said he'd give it to you.

Good. When hell freezes over.

Actually, Benson, I didn't want Chapman
to get the upper hand, so I'm going to

go with Jim's suggestion.

You're going to what?

Don't take that attitude. You should
hear what he's come up with. You see, he

feels that... Well, it's your idea, Jim,
so why don't you tell him?

All schools that do not operate at 65 %
capacity will be shut down.

Well, won't that be kind of confusing
when the students show up and find the

doors locked?

Those students will be reassigned to
other schools so that all educational

institutions operate at or near 100 %
capacity.

We're talking about people, micro
-brain.

That's what Jim is trying to help.

Well, Governor, I think that our first
consideration ought to be the welfare of

the students. Well, we think so, too.

We? Which is why I want to rush this
budget through. We've got to save money.

1 .1 million, to be exact.

Why don't you go play in an electrical
storm?

Benson, I have made up my mind about
this. Jim's abilities are unique. I feel

secure with his budget proposal.

But, Governor... Now, that's all,
Benson.

Okay, fine.

Fine.

You and the pinball machine can go work
on the budget, and I'll be in the

kitchen consulting with the waffle iron.

Nice color.

I hate it.

So do I. I just don't want to make you
feel bad.

Have you totaled the figures on the
household maintenance budget?

Jim's doing it. But I didn't tell you to
give those figures to Jim. I know. The

governor did.

But I need him to work on the
administrative budget.

Oh, you don't. Jim's doing that, too.

This is ridiculous.

Jim's doing the school budget. Jim's
doing the administrative budget. The

thing Jim isn't doing is your nails.

Benson, I need your help.

We must rid ourselves of that meddlesome
robot.

I thought you and he were buddies.

Not anymore.

That little tin Judas on wheels is
trying to take away my job.

I didn't know he had been programmed to
grovel.

That's very funny, but you'll change
your tune when he tries to take away

job. He already has.

Benson, there's only one thing left to
do.

We have got to kill the robot.

What are you talking about? No, no, no,
no. I've thought it all out.

You distract him and I'll push him down
the stairs.

Distract him? What do you want me to do?
Dress up in tinfoil and go coochie,

coochie, coochie?

Well, if it works, do it.

What happened?

Well, it all started innocently enough.
The governor asked Jim to organize his

appointment calendar.

You're kidding.

Well, that wasn't so bad. It's just busy
work.

But then he asked him to store the names
of all the political and civic leaders,

their likes, their dislikes, their
birthdays. Benson!

I have always been in charge of the
important people's list.

No, I know, I know. That's terrible,
Clayton. No.

You haven't heard the worst of it.

He's even cracked my secret code.

What code?

My maitre d' code.

Now he knows the names of all the great
restaurants, the best tables.

Benson, what does the governor need me
for?

Come on, come on, Clint. Come on, try.

Come on. Just calm down now. Just try to
pull yourself together. Stop sniffling.

Come on. Here, have a tissue.

Well, we'll do something about the
robot.

What? Well, I don't know. Maybe we'll
try to talk to the governor again. We

can't. Jim makes all his appointments.

Oh, come on. Let's go to the kitchen.

Have a cup of coffee. We'll think of
something.

And if we don't?

We'll push him down the stairs.

I just feel useless.

Jim's doing everything I used to do. I
tell you, he's the best idea I've ever

had. He balanced my checkbook this
morning. You could have done that

Pete. It only takes ten minutes to
balance a checkbook.

Not if you haven't done it for eight
years.

Think, Benson, think.

I can't think, Clayton. If you're going
to keep whining, think, Benson, think.

Well, we've got to get rid of that...
Shh, shh, shh.

Scrap metal at 10 o 'clock.

Hey,

guys, what's up? Don't you ever speak to
me again.

What did I do? I'm not talking to you
either.

They're upset about... Jim?

Yes, Pete?

Don't bring him over here.

Nothing, Jim.

Nice job on the checkbook.

What are you guys mad at Jim for?

We're not mad at Jim. We're going to
kill him.

But we're not mad at him.

Well, then what's going on?

Well, we're just upset because the
governor seems to be letting Jim take

He's only doing the menial, tedious
stuff. I think he's wonderful.

Well, robots are wonderful, too. But
that's all they are, is a tool.

They can't replace human minds working
on human problems. Well, if you want my

opinion, you're overreacting.

Uh -uh, I agree with them, Pete.

Denise, please, this is man talk.

Benson, will you get through with the
robot? Do you mind roughing up this

I can't believe you guys are jealous of
a robot.

Jeff, can I see you in my office,
please?

Affirmative, Governor.

Hi, fellas.

Take a second. I wanted to talk to you
about that press release you wrote this

morning. What were you saying?

Press release?

Did you hear that? He had the robot
write a press release.

I don't know what you're getting so
excited about. It's just one of those

menial, tedious jobs.

Denise, did you hear that? No, I wasn't
listening. Man talk.

Okay, okay, I get the point. I'm with
you now. How do we kill him?

He's a machine.

We can't kill him.

But we can break him.

All right. Where is that two -timing tin
turkey?

Would your entitled head have a lover's
quarrel?

Put it in a sock, Benson. I'm in a lousy
mood.

That robot has pushed me too far.

Looks like he dragged you a bit, too.

I have just... come from the butcher
shop. He changed my entire order. He's

taken over all my duties.

The next thing you know, Jim will be
head of household affairs and I'll be

nothing. Well, we're all in the same
boat.

Well, I am through talking.

I'm going to take that overeducated
mailbox apart with a hacksaw. All

right, all right, all right.

This is ridiculous. We're blaming a
machine. The real problem is the

He's so impressed with Jim's ability
that he's forgotten what it is we do for

him. What can we do to change the
governor's mind?

Simple. Starting tomorrow, we're going
to remind him of what it is we do for

him.

Well, everybody, phones must be out of
order.

What's going on?

Well, I don't know. I've just been out
playing golf.

Came by to clean out my desk.

Clean out your desk, huh?

That's when I demand an explanation.

Didn't Jim tell you? Jim?

Yeah. You know, the tall, bug -eyed guy
with the aluminum suit.

What about him?

Well, we had a meeting last night, and
it was decided that it wasn't cost

-effective to keep all of us on the
payroll as long as Jim was doing the

So you all decided to resign?

Oh, no.

As soon as we brought it to Jim's
attention, he fired us.

Ridiculous. I want everybody back here
tomorrow morning.

Now, wait a minute, Governor. Shouldn't
we look at this logically?

There's nothing to be gained by hanging
on to non -essential personnel.

What do you mean by non -essential
personnel?

Well, here's Jim now. It's his idea. Let
him talk.

Jim, could you define non -essential
personnel for us?

Those employees whose prime function is
the interpretation of data. This

function is more efficiently performed
by a machine.

Could you scan the personnel file and
give us an example?

Stand by.

Downey, Peter J.

No. Dubois, Benson, no middle initial.

Oh, now just a minute here.

Endicott 3, Clayton R.

This is ridiculous. I need these people.

Gatling, Eugene X.

I can't get along.

Gatling, Eugene X, that's me.

How can I be defined as non -essential
personnel?

Well, let's face it. The governor's job
is to interpret data.

The way Jim sees things, that job could
be done better by a machine.

Is that basically it, Jim?

Affirmative.

Jim, how could you say such a thing?

I have a VoxPack 12 octave speech
synthesizer.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, laser
breath.

He means why.

It's logical.

But my decisions affect the lives of
people. If we based every decision on

and figures, that would be inhuman.

I think you've made your point. What
point?

I've been relying a little too much on
Jim.

Oh, yeah, that was my point.

I would like to meet with you to discuss
your proposals for the school budget.

Two o 'clock.

Fine, Governor. I think we need to study
this problem from a more human point of

view. Oh, and Benson. Yes?

Fire the robot.

It'll be my pleasure.

Jim!

How should I say this?

I get the feeling you're not happy here.

I'm not programmed for emotions.

Oh, I'm glad to hear that, because
that'll make this easier.

Is there something I can do?

Uh, Jimmy, your services here have been
terminated.

Where will I go?

What will I do?

You're smart, Jim.

Get together with a few other appliances
and try to get on Family Feud.

Oh, Benson, I need your help.

What's the problem?

I have a loose groove.

At least we agree on something.

No, no, I'm talking about Wolfgang, my
robot.

I sent him away for a kit.

Kraus, didn't we have enough trouble out
of Jim?

Yeah, but he had a personality problem.

I'm going to rip Wolfgang into shape.

Well, first you've got to whip him into
a robot.

That would be easy. I have a mechanical
mind.

Hopefully someday you'll find the on
switch.