Original subtitles

Oh, Denise, I got out of that meeting late. Call the airport, have them page

Elizabeth and tell her I'm on my way. Wait a minute. I already took care of

that. When I saw you were going to be late, I figured I better get someone to

pick her up. Fast thinking. I sent Pete.

Maybe two fads.

I told him to use your car.

We have just left the realm of thinking.

I told Pete to be careful.

That's not enough.

Did you tell him not to eat in the car?

Did you tell him not to burn rubber at the stoplights?

Did you tell him to stay in the car until it stops?

No, but if he gets back, I will.

Why has the table gone?

That table spends all day with Krause. It's got legs. Maybe it ran away.

I just thought of something. How is Pete going to recognize Elizabeth?

Oh, I gave him the same description you gave me. Very attractive, a beautiful

smile, and the kind of softness that makes you want to hug her. I'm sure

bring back the right one.

Well, who cares as long as she fits that description.

You better not spill that coffee on my desk. Is that what happened to the

It's all beat up. It's out getting a new finish.

I suppose we could do the same thing for you.

is Clayton's birthday. Are we planning to do anything?

I'm planning to call in sick.

I suppose I'll have to make a cake.

I thought we could give him a surprise party.

You want a real surprise?

I'll make the cake.

What cake?

Oh, next Thursday is Clayton's birthday.

Oh, I'll have to get him something.

You know, Miss Cross, I don't know what you've done to the kitchen, but I like

it. It's so much bigger.

Uh, sir.

The kitchen table's not here.

I'm so used to seeing that darn thing, I didn't even miss it. You know,

sometimes I wonder if I'm all here.

What's taking Pete so long? Where'd he go? Oh, he went to pick up Benson's

friend at the airport.

Oh, that's right, the one who's coming for the teacher's convention.

Oh, boy, I bet you're excited. How long has it been since you've seen her? Must

be 20 years.

You're going to be disappointed, Benson.

I had a reunion with an old boyfriend once.

When we first met, he was a tall, handsome soldier, and I was as pure as a

driven snow.

Twenty years later, he was a short, dumpy clerk.

And you had turned to slush.

I don't think you'll be disappointed, Benson. I'll bet when you two get

together, it'll be like nothing's changed.

Yeah, I'm really looking forward to seeing her. We had some great times

together. We spent most of our time at a little jazz club called the Sweet

Potato. I bet we put a thousand miles on that little dance floor.

So that's where you put on all that mileage.

I think he looks pretty good for his age.

you, Benson.

Well, let's put it this way. Even though I'm no longer under warranty, I can

still handle the curves.

I just wish you wouldn't talk in my kitchen.

I had to stop and get gas.

Hey, I'm back.

Fine, Elizabeth.

I'm right here.

Hi, Benson.

You still... next door to Mrs. Sneeda?

Yeah, you remember her son Rodney?

Yeah, that nasty little kid you used to babysit? Well, now I teach his nasty

little twin.

I hope they look like their mother.

No, you don't.

Did you know Louise West?

That their mother?

Poor kids.

I hope they're adopted.

You know, Elizabeth, I've been trying to figure out a way to ease into this.

But I can't, so I'm just going to come right out and say it.

How did this happen, and when did it happen? Well, it was 1966.

It was stupid.

The roads were icy, and I was driving too fast.

Why didn't you let me know?

What was I supposed to do, send you a postcard saying, hi, I'm in a

wish you were here?

Yeah, but you could have told me when you called me last week. I did. I told

I'd be rolling in around 11 .30.

Somehow I was hoping it wouldn't make any difference. Oh, it doesn't make any

difference. It's just that she caught me off guard.

Look, I know you're busy. I just wanted to see you while I was in town.

You are going to let me buy you lunch, aren't you? Now, that's a change from

old days.

What does that mean?

My mother still remembers you as the guy who ate all his meals at our house.

Oh, you're that Elizabeth. Uh -huh. For that, you have to buy me dinner, too.

Okay. You still like Japanese food?

Benson, I can't go to Japanese restaurants anymore.

Why not? They always want me to take my wheels off.

Well, it's nice to see you have a sense of humor about all this. Well, you know,

when you're handicapped, you can't afford to be boring.

Come on, join in. Have some fun.

No, indeed.

I don't compete with sit -down comics.

That's the Benson I remember.

Come on, let's get something to eat.

That's the Benson my mother remembers.

My car's just outside.

I suppose you'll be wanting to drive.

I'm busy.

What do you want me for?

We are having a meeting.

You were talking about Clayton's birthday party.

You call me down here for that?

The governor likes the idea of a surprise party.

We have to take a vote on Clayton's present.

I vote no.

I told you he'd feel that way.

Come on, Benson, help us decide.

I do think it would be best to get him a gift certificate.

That's so impersonal. I'm telling you, we ought to get him a gag gift.

We could get a girl to jump out of a cake.

Isn't that expensive?

Not necessarily, Denise.

I'm not jumping out of any cake.

Well, I have an idea.

No, you're certainly not jumping out of anything.

I was thinking of a golf bag.

You're thinking of jumping out of a golf bag?

No, dummy. I meant buy him a golf bag.

A golf bag doesn't sound bad. Yeah, how much do they run? I saw one on sale for

$50. $50 for an empty bag?

When was the last time you bought groceries?

That would be $10 .50 each if we chip in.

Okay, I'll chip in.

Who'll go get it? I'll get it if you guys will buy me some gas. Okay, okay,

that's simple.

Now, are we talking party hats?

That's my department. All in favor of party hats, raise their hand.

It's a tie.

What's a tie?

A tie?

Oh, he didn't say tie.

He said fly.

Uh, right, a shoe fly pie.

They're really going to use you guys at Watergate.

All right, what's wrong? What aren't you telling me?

You don't want to know, Clayton. It'll only upset you.

Look, Clayton, the governor wouldn't appreciate us talking to you about this,

forget you heard anything.

Well, I'm confident the governor will fill me in.

It goes without saying, I am his most valued employee.

Am I not?

If you think so. Is that my vote? Yes. Absolutely.

The governor's not upset with me, is he?

It's not the Macintosh deal, is it?

Now, that wasn't my fault. I realize someone has to take the blame, but it

should be Macintosh. And if the governor won't support me in this, well, he can

have my resignation.

Well, just remember, Clayton, you didn't hear it from any of us.

I hate this sour juice in these rotten little cans.

Oh, that was a clone.

But fun.

I'm glad I stopped by.

Oh, Vetson, I forgot to tell you. Elizabeth called. She wanted to know if

were free for lunch.

Yeah, I already talked to her. Hey, another lunch, huh? You haven't let her

of your sight for three days, Benson.

Pete, she's only here for a week. I'm just showing her the town.

She's a lovely girl, Benson. You could do a lot worse.

So could she.

I think you two make an adorable couple.

We're not a couple. We're just friends, pals, buddies.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute now. Nobody's giving money for the golf bag.

Where's my share?

Fifteen bucks.

Fifteen? I thought we said 12 .50. Yeah, but you gotta figure tax, gasoline for

my car, and if I'm out that long, I should get lunch.

Here's 15 for the bag and tax. Yeah, but what if I get... Pack a lunch and take

the bus.

You serve much better food than they do at my hotel.

How would you know? You haven't eaten the food at your hotel. Yeah, but I've

seen it in the hall.

I'm gonna leave the dishes for Mrs. Loomis.

Oh, you have a maid?

No, a domestic engineer.

She comes in three days a week, when she can remember.

Oh, look at you.

A maid, a fancy apartment, a big office in the governor's mansion.

If I'd known you were going to be this successful, I would never have let you

get away.

What do you mean, get away? You're the one who went traipsing off to grad

school. Yeah, but when I came back, you were gone.

Well, I got a better job offering Philadelphia.

That's one thing we always shared.

What's that?

Lousy timing.

Yep.

You know, these last few days have just been wonderful, Benson.

Being with you is just as I remember it. I've enjoyed it, too.

Help me on for the count. Sure.

You know, the teachers I came with have been teasing me about you.

Well, they've been working me over pretty good at the mansion, too. Yeah?

Thanks, I needed that.

What'd they say?

Yeah, you know, the usual.

You know, we make a cute couple, stuff like that.

Yeah, what did you tell them?

I told them we were just pals, buddies.

Shouldn't lie to your friends.

Huh?

Don't bother me, Benson.

I have two more layers to do.

That's an awful lot of makeup, isn't it?

I am baking a cake.

Today is Clayton's birthday.

Oh. Have you seen Denise?

Yeah, she went to the storeroom for the party decorations.

What? On government time?

You know, you're getting to be more and more like Clayton.

Krauss, that's a cheap shot.

Thank you, Benson.

I found some party hats and a box of decorations.

Where are we going to have the party?

Benson's office.

Benson who?

That's a perfect place for the party. John Clayton would never suspect it.

Don't you people ever get tired of talking behind my back?

I don't.

How about you, Krauss?

Didn't the Macintosh affair provide you with sufficient amusement at my expense?

You tricked me into making a fool of myself in front of the governor. When I

begged him to let me keep my job, the man looked at me like I was a simpering

idiot.

Then we thought the governor didn't pay attention.

Do you think I'm blind to all this animosity?

Well, let me tell you something.

Prehistoric men feared the sun because they didn't understand it.

Listen, did you see Rosemary's baby?

Yeah. Did the baby live?

Yeah.

I think I know where it is.

Well, one good thing, he sure as shootin' doesn't know anything about the

birthday party.

Okay, I'd better bring this up to the office.

Oh, gee, that looks heavy.

Oh, sort of. Can I give you a hand?

Why, thanks, Pete.

Here you go.

Hi, guys.

Oh, hey, can I lick the bowl? No, you may not.

And have you gift -wrapped that golf bag yet?

Oh, I knew there was something I forgot to do.

Well, bring it here. I'll wrap it.

Yeah, well, I gotta go buy it first.

Benji, can you loan me $50?

Peter, are you out of your mind? We already gave you the money. Oh, it's in

other wallet.

Hey! Okay, forget it. I'll put it on my credit card. How could you do this to

our money?

Well, unfortunately, I ran into my landlord yesterday.

It was unavoidable. He was in my apartment.

If I didn't give him something, he was going to take my hot plate.

What did you do with your rent money?

Car payment was late.

What did you do with your car payment?

I used it to pay my phone bill.

I used the phone money for the utilities. The utilities paid my

used my alimony to pay off my student loan.

But what about food?

Hey, thanks. What do you got?

Hey, go get the golf bag.

And make it snappy.

Okay, okay.

Oh, great.

I have to make a whole new cake.

Gross. It's for Clayton.

Oh, yeah, that's right.

I know these decorations aren't exactly right for a birthday, but I think it

works. Okay, open your eyes.

What do you think?

I like it better with my eyes closed.

What time is the party? Four o 'clock.

Oh, Elizabeth called again. I think you ought to call her back.

I will.

I will.

I just want to study these demographics.

Okay. But don't forget, the fun begins at four.

Oh, I love what you've done with the office. There's no reason for government

be stuffy.

Sir, these are for Clayton's party.

Oh. Yeah, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. See, I didn't know what to

get him, so I bought two things. I bought a leather appointment book and a

silver pen and pencil set. Which should I give him?

Doesn't really make any difference to me, sir. Well, it sort of does, because,

you see, your birthday's just around the corner, and whatever I don't give him

will be yours.

Does the appointment book look anything like this? It's exactly like that.

Where'd you get it? You gave it to me for Christmas.

Oh, well, then you'll get the silver pen and pencil set.

Hello? Oh, thank you, Denise.

Excuse me, Governor, it's Elizabeth.

Oh, should I leave? No, no.

Hi.

Oh, yeah, I've been on the run all day.

No, I didn't forget the banquet tonight. This wraps up the convention, right?

Oh? You are?

But I thought you had to get back to Baltimore.

Mm -hmm. Well, okay.

All right, I'll see you later. All right.

You all right?

It's Elizabeth.

She's decided to stay a few extra days.

And you'd rather she didn't?

Yeah, yeah, for her sake.

See, she's got the wrong idea about our relationship. She wants to pick up where

we left off 20 years ago.

And you don't want to? No.

Well, tell her.

I can't.

I'm afraid she'll think it's because of the wheelchair.

Is it?

No.

She was only going to be here for a week, and I'd let her believe whatever

wanted to believe.

Yeah. Is it all right to bring the cake in? Yeah, sure.

Come on in. Okay, here we go.

It's four o 'clock. Okay, I'll get Clayton. Where's Pete?

He just pulled in. I heard him run into the garbage can.

I'm in Benton's office. Could I see you here for a moment?

Thank you.

He's coming right over. Oh, good. Everyone put on their hats.

Yeah, this is fun.

Are we going to play party games, too?

We could play pin the tail on the donkey.

I'll be the lookout.

Sorry, I'm late.

Oh, Pete, the wrapping looks great.

Yeah, you guys owe me three bucks for it.

Did you get a card?

What do you think, I'm made of money?

Here he comes, here he comes. Everybody look casual.

Governor, Katie Benson?

Oh, you shouldn't have.

That's what I kept saying.

Here, Clayton, this is for you. Oh, Katie, how can I thank you?

Are you going to open it?

Oh, yes, of course.

Oh.

Oh.

I made it myself.

It's a nut dish.

Sweets for the sweet.

Happy birthday, Clayton. Oh, thank you, sir.

It's a watch, I'll betcha. How much?

It's a silver pen and pencil set.

It's just what I wanted.

Me too.

Okay, Clayton, get ready for the big one.

Peter. Peter, thank you. That's from all of us.

Look, I was going to tell him.

Oh.

Oh, you people.

Weed cutter.

What happened to the golf bag?

Oh, they didn't have any golf bags. My charge account's at Murray's Hardware

Store.

Go on, Clayton.

Go on. Make a wish. Yeah, make a wish. A wish? What's that?

What more could I wish for? This is my very first surprise party. I've never

experienced such an open display of affection. And to tell you the truth,

Makes me feel a little queasy.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Clayton.

Happy birthday to you.

I hope

you weren't too bored.

Bored?

At a teacher's banquet?

I should say not.

I thought it was extremely educational.

You were bored.

No, not at all. I had a great time.

If I'd known teachers could be that inept, I'd have been better in school.

They put on one of those reviews at every convention.

Oh, really?

I especially liked the shop teacher from Jersey who sang the entire score of

Cabaret.

Oh, Bert.

Yeah. Is that Liza Minnelli costume part of his own private wardrobe?

Nadine Bushmiller sure took a liking to you.

Nadine Bushmiller? Is that the woman who was sitting next to me? Yeah, the one

that was falling out of the blue dress.

Did she teach kindergarten?

Yeah, how'd you know?

She kept trying to feed me.

You didn't seem to mind.

Well, what are you going to do when a grown woman says, open wide, here comes

the choo -choo?

Oh, Nadine was feeling no pain, huh?

Yeah. I was just as happy when she fell asleep in her chitlin's flambé.

Well?

Well, what?

We could have had a nightcap back at the hotel, Benson.

If you got something to say, I'm ready.

Yeah.

Well, um... I'm a lot tougher than I look.

You can say it.

Elizabeth, the last thing in the world I want to do is hurt you.

I'm not looking for an emotional handout, Benson.

When the doctor told me that I would never get up out of this chair again

without some help, when that sank in...

That was the last time I felt sorry for myself or was afraid.

I'm out here to live, Benson, with you or someone else.

Now tell me what you got to say, because I can take it. I can handle it.

I can handle anything.

No, you can't, baby. It's just that I don't know what I was trying to do.

Make up for an accident that I had nothing to do with or show you a good

that you'd never forget.

Well, thanks for the special attention.

I don't blame you for thinking it was more than that.

I did, you know.

Yes.

I was so busy being thoughtful and considerate that I never realized that

might take it the wrong way.

It was my mistake.

I apologize and I'm sorry.

I am too.

It seems we had the same conversation on my front porch back in Baltimore when I

told you I was going away to school.

20 years is a long time, Elizabeth.

Yeah, and feelings change.

Well, that's what I had to know.

I had to know before I went back home.

Oh, Alyssa.

Look, um... I can work it out.

We went through this before, remember?

The same old problem.

Lousy timing.

At least we're consistent.

Yeah.

I'm... glad that it worked out this way because...

I would hate to lose you as a friend.

That's one thing you'll never have to worry about, Beth.

So, what do you say? You want to go or not?

Okay, what's playing?

The Lunchroom Murders.

Pete, I don't like films where you see more of people's insides than their

outsides.

Well, do you want to meet me after the movie?

Maybe some other time.

Look, Denise, I think we should come to an understanding about our relationship.

What relationship?

No, see, that's what I mean.

Pete, don't rush me.

Well, is there anything I can do to change your mind?

Well, we could do something I like to do.

Name it.

Okay. Well, we could go out to dinner, then maybe go to the theater, then stop

somewhere to dance.

That's not a date. That's a vacation.

Pete, I don't... like to do things normal people like to do.

Yeah, well, I'll come back when you're in a better mood.

Hi, Pete. Yeah, sure.

Did you get Elizabeth to the airport on time? Yeah.

Any messages?

No. Oh, but there's a woman waiting in your office.

A woman? Yeah, she said she was a friend of yours. Her name is Nadine

Bushmiller.

Nadine.