Original subtitles

Morning, Benson.

Good morning, Katie.

I heard you have a new girlfriend.

Who told you that?

We women have ways of finding these things out.

Just because I've gone out with Cynthia a few times doesn't mean she's my new

girlfriend. You men are so naive.

Is she going to be late for school?

Right. I just didn't want to get there too early.

Walter Murphy might be there.

Oh, I thought you liked Walter.

I do.

But I figure I'll play hard to get for a while.

Then what?

Then I'll reel him in.

Learning younger every day.

Hey, Benson. How's it going with your new girlfriend?

Girlfriend? Oh, didn't you know?

He's been getting all these notes from her. Cute little kitty cats on them.

How is it that queen?

Does she dot her eyes with little hearts?

Those cards are from my niece.

She's got great legs.

My niece?

No, your girlfriend.

Why is everybody fascinated with my social life?

Everybody isn't.

You know, if I had a girl like that, I'd be talking about her all the time.

That's why you don't have a girl like that.

Girl like what?

Oh, we were just discussing Benson's lady of the moment.

Oh, was that the one you took to the attorney general's banquet?

Yes, sir.

Hubba hubba.

Hubba hubba. Oh, it's a compliment, Benson. I mean, she's very attractive.

Great legs.

I didn't think you'd notice her. I thought you went to sleep at that

Don't touch that phone. I answered the phone in the kitchen now.

Hello?

Oh, yeah, he's right here.

It's your main theme.

All right, Cynthia.

Yeah, sure, I'm free for lunch.

Japanese sounds fine.

I don't know, I've never had sushi.

Oh, sushi's great.

Thank you so much.

Oh, sure, why not? I'll pick you up at 12 .30.

What's that?

Oh, yeah, me too.

Yeah,

well, sure, there are other people in the room.

I'm afraid.

Say it in front of them.

Oh, yeah, well... Okay, okay, me too, me too.

I'll be going out for lunch.

Uh, Cynthia.

What is this?

I told you, raw fish.

Could you be more specific?

Why do you have to know what everything is?

Because I just ate something that tastes like a rubber glove.

It could be the octopus.

Or an old scuba suit.

You haven't eaten anything but your rice.

I ate some of that pink stuff.

What pink stuff?

Them little things look like eyelids.

Oh, poor me.

You're too terrible.

Tell you what, on the way back, I'll buy you a hamburger.

Well, it's okay. Don't worry about it. I didn't come here for the food. I came

here for the company.

You two should be looking for a darker restaurant, eh?

Don't pay any attention to him. Eventually, he'll leave.

Come on, Benson. Aren't you going to introduce me to your girlfriend?

Cynthia Howard Pete Downey, master of bad timing.

Are you following me? No, I'm having lunch with Jeff Dalton. The political

columnist? Right. You mind if we join you? Yes.

Okay.

I'll see what I can pick up at the bar.

Try the octopus.

Good friend?

Well, that depends. Would you hold it against me?

Listen, I've got to talk to you.

Oh, this is serious.

What makes you think so?

Well, every time you fold your hands like that, it means playtime's over.

Well, don't look so worried. This isn't a marriage proposal.

Good. Then I can start breathing again.

But I do want to talk about business.

I thought we had a rule about that.

Vincent, I'm a lobbyist. You're the budget director. We have got to talk

sometimes. No mixing business with pleasure.

Just because we're dating, you're willing to overlook a good idea?

Why not? I overlooked this raw fish.

Listen, it's those 15 acres of bottom land over on Highway 19.

Oh, you drive me crazy when you talk about bottom land.

Now, the company I represent, Yakagami... Ooh, I love it when you call

Yakagami.

Yakagami Developments would like to buy that land and build an industrial park.

And you figured if I ate some raw fish, I'd be on their side.

Look, I've got all the facts and figures for you right here.

Well, you know, I can't show you any special favors, Cynthia.

I'm not asking you to.

Just give our proposal a fair reading. All right, read the papers, and I'll

a look at them.

But I'm not making any promises.

None at all?

None that have to do with business.

Well, in that case, there's still about 20 minutes left on this lunch hour if

you'd like to go into the parking lot and next. Check.

Denise, you finished typing that report?

Yes. It took me 47 minutes and 30 seconds.

Why are you always timing yourself?

Oh, I keep records for my mother.

It gives her a chance to live vicariously. She never had the

become a secretary.

Daddy married her. Not that she got a bad deal. I mean, their life has been

a fairy tale.

My life was like a fairy tale.

Wolf was always at the door.

There are coffee cups on your desk. I told you not to do that.

I'm relieved to see it's you, Kraus. I thought for a moment we were being

invaded.

The next time you take coffee to your office, use a paper cup.

And the next time you come to my office, wear a paper bag.

I'm warning you, Benson. If I catch you stealing cups again, it won't be a

pretty sight.

Well?

Well, what?

Didn't you hear me? I said it won't be a pretty sight.

So?

You're no fun at all since you got promoted.

You were never a pretty sight.

I hear you!

Denise, no visitors unless it's the governor.

All right, then.

Hi, is Benson in his office?

Yes, but he's not taking any visitors.

Oh, great.

So, uh, how's it going?

How's what going?

You know, life.

Wow, that's a tough one.

You don't really have to answer that. I just came by to say hello.

Oh, hello.

You do remember me, don't you? Of course I do.

Paul.

Pete. I knew it was one of the apostles.

Let me ask you something.

Are you married or anything like that?

Oh, no, no. Mom and Dad agree that I should really wait until I meet somebody

special. Oh, my mom and Dad think I'm pretty special.

Listen, the singer from General Hospital is giving a concert down at the Civic,

and I was wondering if the two of us could... So what do you say?

I didn't know there was a singer on General Hospital.

Oh, yeah, the guy plays Noah Drake. What's his name?

You want to go with me or not?

Let me think about it.

That's not a no, right?

Right. When is it?

Well, I don't know.

I'll be back.

Oh, Pete, I left the speech on your desk. Oh, you just missed me.

I came here to see Benson, but he's not seeing anybody.

Oh, then I'll come back later. Oh, no, he's seeing you, Governor. Oh, good.

Listen, if you decide to go, plan on bringing the sandwiches.

Hi, Benson. Hope I'm not interrupting anything.

Oh, no, Governor.

I'm glad you stopped by.

On that, uh, Yakagami proposal, I was wondering if you'd read it. We don't

to jump right into business, do we, Benson? Oh, no, of course not. What's on

your mind?

Oh, everything.

Where I've been, where I'm going.

Why you're here.

Yeah, that too.

I've just been so darn lucky.

Yeah, I know how depressing that can be.

What will happen when my luck runs out?

Some guy at the cemetery will throw dirt in your face.

Oh, I'm not going to be buried.

No. I've left instructions that I be cremated and my ashes scattered over the

lumber mill.

I'll mix in with the sawdust and be among my friends for the rest of

Until some guy sweeps up.

Oh, uh, sir, I just read Benson's proposal concerning that parcel of state

on Highway 19.

And? And it's an excellent piece of research. I totally agree with your

conclusions. Where did I go wrong?

That's why I came in here, the Yakagami proposal. I think it's a heck of a deal,

Benson. Yes, sir. It'll create 400 new jobs.

You two seem convinced. I was convinced when I came in here, so let's do it.

I'll get my people on it right away.

Well, Benson, it's after 12.

Want a little lunch? Oh, no, sir. I have a date.

Oh, who?

Cynthia.

Do I know her?

Sure.

Humbah, humbah.

So how

about

it, Benson? Can I borrow your car?

No way, Pete.

Oh, come on. I've been waiting three weeks for this date. I can't take Denise

out in my car. I'm trying to impress her.

You'll need more than a car.

Gentlemen.

Hey, uh, Clayton, can I borrow your... No.

How can you say no? You don't even know what it is yet. Whatever it is, you

can't borrow it. Oh, that's terrific.

Thanks a lot.

Now I gotta rent a car to go to a drive -in.

Well, Benson, Yakagami Developments finalized the deal on that piece of

this morning.

We did it.

We? You and I.

Endicott and Dubois, think of it. Please, not while I'm eating.

You know, if we teamed up, there is absolutely nothing we couldn't

Couldn't have a baby.

I think you should take this seriously, Benson.

Okay, we'll adopt.

Fine. Be that way. I guess there's nothing more to discuss.

Have you seen today's paper?

No, why?

Benson made Jeff Dalton's column. How bad is it?

Could it be that our new budget director supported the Yakagami deal because of

his current amour, Cynthia Howard?

Yakagami's brainy but beautiful lobbyist.

Did you know Cynthia Howard was a lobbyist?

Yes. The same Cynthia Howard you've been dating for the past two months?

She's the only one I know.

And yet you initiated legislation on her behalf?

It's a brilliant move, Benson.

Makes you the first member of this administration to be involved in a

I still can't figure out how that reporter even knew about Cynthia and me.

brought them over to your table at that sushi place, remember?

What? That skinny little yup with the glasses?

He's tough, Benson. He spent six weeks with the Afghan guerrillas. Did he write

stories about their girlfriends?

Face it, Benson, this woman used you.

She didn't use me. Everything was above board.

Well, that may be true, but it's not what people are going to think.

I don't care what people think.

Yes?

No, I have nothing to say to the press. Neither does Benson.

I'll just say no comment. Thank you.

You better lie low, Benson. Those guys are out for blood. Am I missing

here? I made that recommendation based on my own research, not just the

information that Cynthia gave me. You should have told us where you got that

information. Oh, you're making this look as if I did something wrong. Oh, forget

about it. Tomorrow they're going to be wrapping garbage in that paper. Well,

today they're writing garbage in it.

Thank you, Pete.

Benson and I need a moment alone.

It's okay by me. I hate being in these kind of meetings.

Well, I don't.

Benson, this is a lot like what happened to Scooter McPhee and the Admiral.

Did I ever tell you that story?

No, that's one I missed.

Well, it was during the war, and our ship was anchored off the coast of New

Zealand, see, and Scooter was officer of the deck.

And he had orders not to let anybody on board without the password, which, as I

recall, was Flounder. Uh, no, no, no, it was Trout.

Wait a minute. Maybe it was Shark.

Does it really matter?

Well, it did to Scooter.

See, because this Admiral tried to come on board, and he didn't know the

password. So Scooter wouldn't let him off the gangway.

Well, the Admiral had the war on his mind, you know, and he was pretty

impatient. Yeah, I think I know how he felt.

So he just shoved right... passed and got on deck.

And that's when Scooter did the right thing. He took his billy club and he

knocked that admiral cold as a mackerel.

Mackerel! That was the fast billy.

See, what I'm trying to say is that even doing the right thing can sometimes

look wrong, depending on the circumstances.

It's a political reality.

Well, the reality is I've done nothing wrong.

Oh, that's what Scooter kept saying.

Yelling, actually.

From the brig.

For 30 days.

I catch your drift.

Okay, then it's forgotten.

Let's hope it's clear sailing from here on.

Aye, aye, sir.

She can't do this to me. I've already rented a car.

Pete, I'm sorry.

Clayton's secretary went home sick, and I'm the only other person that can help

him with this report.

Listen, why don't you go ahead and see the movies? We'll do it another time.

Boy, that's a definition of lonely for you. A single guy in a rented Maverick

watching a Laura Antonelli festival?

See you later.

Bye.

Hey, you're the press secretary. What's going on? Just got dumped.

mean depressed?

You said this whole thing would blow over in a couple of days.

Vincent, not now. I'm kind of depressed.

There are articles in all these newspapers, man. They're hanging me out

Last night, they attacked me on the 11 o 'clock news.

I know. I was home, alone.

Can you forget about your love life for a moment? I've got a serious problem

here. Well, you don't think my love life is serious?

Thanks. I'm going to the movies.

I think you and I had better have a talk.

A conference with Clayton.

Perfect way to end a perfect day.

I'll try to be brief.

I wish you'd be pleasant.

You've got big trouble, Benson.

I've got big trouble? You just sat on my ink pad.

Now that I know what's on your mind, what do you have to say?

Did you see the interview with Senator Chapman on the midday news?

No. But I'm sure you'll be delighted to fill me in on the highlights.

Well, basically, he is using your blunder to imply that the governor is

incompetent. He has demanded a complete review of all current legislation, which

brings us to the central theme of this conversation.

I thought you said you'd be brief.

Benson, the legislature just killed the governor's school lunch program.

What? That was a certainty.

Then you see my point?

You've gone beyond being an embarrassment. You are a liability.

And unless you do something about it, you are going to pull down this entire

administration with you. What do you expect me to do?

Ah, ah, ah.

It's not my place to tell you what to do. It's never stopped you before.

I've given you all the facts, Benson.

Now, it's up to you.

Come on in. Is this the home of the famous Vincent Creole Gumbo?

Hi, babe.

Want a drink or anything?

Oh, I'll take or anything.

Come on, baby. I got my hands full.

What's wrong with you?

Did you read the newspaper?

Ah, that's politics.

You have to shake it off if you expect to last in this business.

Yeah?

Well, fix yourself a drink.

We gotta get back to the gumbo.

Are you mad at me?

I'm mad at the whole situation.

Vincent, don't let the press get to you.

Stop taking everything they print about you personally.

I don't. I don't care what they say about me.

Well, don't worry about me.

I'm not.

You could have found a nicer way to say that.

I'm sorry. I'm upset.

Look at this.

The governor's popularity has dropped eight points since this Yakagami thing

began. This afternoon, the legislature pulled the plug on his school lunch

program. I make one mistake.

One little mistake. Hell, it wasn't even a mistake.

And the governor's whole political future is on the line. Honey, you're

things out of proportion.

We should have stuck to our rule. No mixing business with pleasure.

You are mad at me.

Come on.

Salad's ready.

Wait a minute.

You're acting like I knew this was going to happen. Well, Cynthia, you've been

in politics a lot longer than me.

That's kind of an insensitive remark.

Yeah, part of my charm.

Look, if you don't want to discuss this... I don't.

Want some wine?

Not really.

In fact, I don't have much appetite at all.

Look, this is not the right time for a romantic dinner.

You obviously have some things to work out.

I think what I should do is say good night, and we'll save the gumbo for the

good time.

Governor, can I talk to you?

Governor?

Governor?

Oh, hi, Benson. What are you doing here at 7 o 'clock in the morning?

I wanted to get this out of the way first. Can I ask you a question?

Shoot. Do you think the school lunch program was defeated because of this

Yakagami business?

Oh, well, I think Senator Chapman used it as a leverage against me and so on my

policy. You think he'll keep it up?

Oh, I don't know. He's always been a street fighter.

Well, it looks like this whole incident is going to cost you plenty.

Oh, that's politics, Benson.

But that ain't luck at all. We can keep it out of the campaign.

Maybe this will help.

What's that?

My resignation.

Denise, will you stop sniffling? I'm sure the new budget director will keep

around. But I like you.

I like me too, but that doesn't solve our problem.

If you go, I go. We'll show these people they can't push us around.

Benson, I need to talk to you. Why don't you just go talk to your reporter

friends?

She's not my type anyway.

What is it, Pete?

Are you packing already?

No, I'm smuggling office supplies to Cuba.

Then it's true. You are leaving.

Oh, hey, Benson, I'm going to miss you.

You were a nice guy.

You really cared about people.

I'm just resigning, Pete. I'm not dead.

Hey, well, listen, I know this sounds kind of cold, but I've got to prepare a

press release on why you quit.

Do you have a good reason?

Yeah, the Yakagami thing.

No, I can't use that. That's the real reason.

Shouldn't you be someplace else?

Well, I'll just say you're sick.

I'll bring it back for you to proofread. Pete, I'm leaving.

You can't just stick around for an hour.

Go with my instincts.

I'm glad you're still here, Benson.

I've been thinking it over. I've decided not to accept your resignation.

What does that mean?

It means you can't quit.

I already did.

Doesn't count.

I didn't accept it.

Well, give it to Clayton. He'll accept it.

Listen, Benson, I know why you're doing this. To protect me. I think that's

admirable. Only a real friend would put himself on the line like that.

Thank you, sir. But I'm still not going to let you quit.

Well, you told me I had to face political reality.

I did, and the truth is I'm a liability.

The longer I stay here, the more difficult your job becomes.

Well, that's one point of view. It's not one that I agree with.

Listen, Benson, I didn't put you in this job as a sort of favor, as a reward

for good service.

I saw something special in you, kind of wisdom, kind of honesty.

Nothing's happened to change what I see.

Sure, I could find another budget director.

It'd be a very hard job to find another man like you, my friend.

What, you gonna say something?

Not while I have this lump in my throat.

Will you stay?

I have to. You won't let me quit?

Good.

I'll help you unpack.

I'm sorry I got us into this mess.

Oh, that's all right. It's only three or four boxes.

That's not what I meant, sir.

I know what you meant, Benson.

Good night, Krauss.

Good night. It's barely five o 'clock.

I've got to get home and heat up some gumbo. Oh, yeah?

What are you poisoning tonight?

Very funny.

It happens to be a prize -winning dish that Cynthia is dying to try.

Dying? Interesting choice of words.

All right, Kraus, lay off my cooking.

Oh, Benson, you can dish it out, but you can't take it.

Yeah, well, when you dish it out, I can take it, but I can't eat it.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Yeah?

Yeah.

Are you really this angry?

No, are you?

Not really.

Good night.