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All language subtitles for The Comic Strip s02e05 Gino Full Story and Pics

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:06,250 --> 00:01:07,250 What are you doing? 2 00:01:09,410 --> 00:01:10,930 Hiding. From the police? 3 00:01:11,710 --> 00:01:12,710 Don't worry. 4 00:01:13,230 --> 00:01:14,350 I hate the bastards. 5 00:01:15,490 --> 00:01:17,010 They towed my car away last week. 6 00:01:18,150 --> 00:01:19,670 You can come through the back way if you like. 7 00:01:22,090 --> 00:01:23,090 What have you done? 8 00:01:23,410 --> 00:01:24,410 Nothing much. 9 00:01:24,450 --> 00:01:26,450 You're not violent, are you? No, no, no. 10 00:01:33,630 --> 00:01:35,230 Actually, I'm a writer. 11 00:01:36,780 --> 00:01:39,540 I wondered if you'd be interested in this script I've written. 12 00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:43,940 It's a 30 -minute TV play aimed at young people. 13 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:46,240 I mean, that's what I'm interested in. 14 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:50,000 Do you like plays for young people? 15 00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:54,900 Oh, yes. 16 00:01:57,920 --> 00:01:59,920 I've tried several of the TV companies. 17 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:04,140 Bastards! It's too controversial, that's the problem. 18 00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:12,040 I mean, I could write that shit, but what's the point in compromising? 19 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,040 Life's too short, really, isn't it? 20 00:02:18,380 --> 00:02:19,480 Do you want some more tea? 21 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:20,860 No, listen, where's your back door? 22 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:24,720 Um, it's blocked up. I can't open it. 23 00:02:29,700 --> 00:02:34,280 This is a good bit. This guy is your age, and he meets a sailor at the pub. 24 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:35,560 He says... 25 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:37,200 I bet she's good at it. 26 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:38,740 Nodding to the girl at the bar. 27 00:02:39,460 --> 00:02:41,700 Sailor? Not me, mate. I'm queer. 28 00:02:41,900 --> 00:02:43,040 What do you see in girls? 29 00:02:43,260 --> 00:02:44,260 I don't know. 30 00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:47,000 It's supposed to be North Country. I can't do the actions. 31 00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:56,160 Don't worry, I'll... This is a bit much, isn't it? I'm trying to work. 32 00:02:56,540 --> 00:02:57,880 Police. Now look here. 33 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:00,400 I'm sick of you bastards coming round here. 34 00:03:01,580 --> 00:03:05,660 My car was towed away, there was no apology, and you have the nerve to 35 00:03:05,660 --> 00:03:07,000 £30 for its return. 36 00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:08,220 What is this? 37 00:03:08,420 --> 00:03:09,580 Russia, Herr Fuhrer? 38 00:03:13,540 --> 00:03:14,020 West 39 00:03:14,020 --> 00:03:21,200 End, 40 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:22,240 please, Gough. 41 00:03:22,860 --> 00:03:24,580 I'm finishing my lunch first. 42 00:03:25,020 --> 00:03:26,480 Quick! It's important! 43 00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:29,100 Don't tell me what's important, John. 44 00:03:29,959 --> 00:03:33,400 I've got angina. Do you know what that means? That means I've got to eat 45 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:37,260 otherwise I'll die. Then you won't be going anywhere in this cab, will you? 46 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:39,560 Come in. 47 00:03:40,260 --> 00:03:40,978 Come in. 48 00:03:40,980 --> 00:03:42,260 Look at that. Look at that. 49 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:44,820 Rush, rush, rush. See him, see him. 50 00:03:45,020 --> 00:03:45,799 Heart attack. 51 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:47,500 Look, I've got to get to an hospital. 52 00:03:47,940 --> 00:03:48,940 It's an emergency. 53 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:51,540 I'm a nuclear scientist and I've been exposed to radiation. 54 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:54,159 Out of cab. 55 00:03:54,160 --> 00:03:55,160 Out of cab. 56 00:03:55,230 --> 00:03:56,590 All right, look, look, I'm sorry. 57 00:03:56,950 --> 00:04:00,410 The police are after me, but it's not my fault. It's a case of mistaken 58 00:04:00,410 --> 00:04:01,530 identity, really. 59 00:05:14,410 --> 00:05:15,730 Excuse me, do you have a light? 60 00:05:16,770 --> 00:05:18,250 No, no, sorry. 61 00:05:18,490 --> 00:05:24,330 Oh dear, I'm bursting for a ciggy. I don't smoke normally, but I'm so 62 00:05:27,750 --> 00:05:28,970 Capital Radio. 63 00:05:31,370 --> 00:05:33,250 Do you listen to Capital Radio? 64 00:05:33,710 --> 00:05:37,650 I'm doing a special interview there in half an hour. That's why I'm so nervous. 65 00:05:40,670 --> 00:05:42,390 Would you need to not work here? 66 00:05:42,930 --> 00:05:44,440 No. Oh. 67 00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:46,840 My talent. 68 00:05:47,440 --> 00:05:49,260 Rich is just a little bit more. 69 00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:59,480 Right, how much do I owe then? 70 00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:01,440 Uh, pound. 71 00:06:02,660 --> 00:06:04,660 Oh dear, can you change a fiver? 72 00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:06,040 Uh, no, sorry, no. 73 00:06:06,780 --> 00:06:09,520 Well, what about that little purse dangling there? 74 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,000 hands, you could yourself. 75 00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:19,480 Yeah. 76 00:06:19,700 --> 00:06:21,200 Oh, my God, and your face. 77 00:06:21,420 --> 00:06:22,420 Are you all right? 78 00:06:22,660 --> 00:06:23,660 Yeah, I'm fine, thanks. 79 00:06:23,980 --> 00:06:26,100 Oh, well, take care, then. Bye. 80 00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:27,360 Bye -bye. 81 00:06:52,270 --> 00:06:53,490 That'll be £3 .90 for you. 82 00:06:54,590 --> 00:06:55,610 £3 .90. 83 00:07:01,830 --> 00:07:03,530 I've had a good day. 84 00:07:04,410 --> 00:07:07,090 Keep the train, lucky boy. 85 00:07:09,330 --> 00:07:12,390 Drive! Just drive anywhere. It's all right, I'll pay. 86 00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:54,520 I'm a thief. 87 00:08:33,529 --> 00:08:34,830 How much do I owe you? 88 00:09:04,780 --> 00:09:05,780 What time is it? 89 00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:07,920 I'm supposed to be at work at nine. 90 00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:13,540 But where are we anyway? 91 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:17,540 Um, Essex. 92 00:09:20,680 --> 00:09:23,380 No, I'm really sorry, I don't know much about last night. 93 00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:28,180 I don't really know who you are. What am I supposed to be doing in Essex? 94 00:09:34,060 --> 00:09:35,060 Do you mind driving me back? 95 00:09:35,460 --> 00:09:36,520 No, no, I can't. 96 00:09:36,980 --> 00:09:38,120 What, have you nicked it or something? 97 00:09:40,620 --> 00:09:41,620 No. 98 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:46,640 I'm the heart attack taxi thief. 99 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:48,520 All right. 100 00:09:49,780 --> 00:09:51,100 I'm Angie. Pleased to meet you. 101 00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:17,840 Yeah, thanks. Be quick. I'm in a hurry. 102 00:10:24,540 --> 00:10:26,620 Hi, I'm Max. How are you? Here, take this. 103 00:10:26,900 --> 00:10:27,900 Oh, thanks. 104 00:10:28,020 --> 00:10:30,720 Don't thank me. Just strap yourself in in case I turn this thing over. 105 00:10:31,060 --> 00:10:32,060 Son of a bitch! 106 00:10:39,620 --> 00:10:40,399 Ha -ha! 107 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,620 Didn't expect you to do that. 108 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:50,520 I'm an epileptic. 109 00:10:50,700 --> 00:10:52,180 I've been all right since Christmas. 110 00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:54,780 My wife says I'm crazy and ought to be locked up. 111 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:56,400 Perhaps she's right. 112 00:10:57,100 --> 00:10:59,720 I wish I could see her. 113 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,480 She won't let me in the house without a lawyer. 114 00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:04,440 I mean, that's not a proper marriage, is it? 115 00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:06,340 Are you married? 116 00:11:07,620 --> 00:11:08,620 No. 117 00:11:10,220 --> 00:11:11,500 It's a night I can't take. 118 00:11:11,860 --> 00:11:13,420 It's all right at first to stay with friends. 119 00:11:14,580 --> 00:11:17,240 But you know what it's like when you start falling over and frightening the 120 00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:18,240 children. 121 00:11:18,540 --> 00:11:20,920 And then in the morning it was, Matt, can you go now? 122 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:23,500 I said, Mary, it's half past five in the morning. 123 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,060 He said, I'm sorry, Matt. 124 00:11:25,340 --> 00:11:26,340 I'm sorry. 125 00:11:26,740 --> 00:11:28,380 I don't feel safe while you're in the house. 126 00:11:29,740 --> 00:11:30,740 Cigarette? 127 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:33,040 Yeah. 128 00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:35,640 Cool. 129 00:11:36,580 --> 00:11:41,080 I admit it, I'm a bit of a mess just now. I haven't slept for seven days. 130 00:11:43,740 --> 00:11:44,920 I'm a nice guy, aren't I? 131 00:11:47,310 --> 00:11:50,650 I've been driving around in this car for three days and I don't know who I am 132 00:11:50,650 --> 00:11:51,650 anymore. 133 00:11:51,850 --> 00:11:52,850 And it's starting to dig. 134 00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:57,970 If someone doesn't start to understand me right now, I'm going to kill it all 135 00:11:57,970 --> 00:11:58,970 and I mean it. 136 00:11:59,210 --> 00:12:00,550 And I'm coming across. 137 00:12:01,010 --> 00:12:02,730 Look, Max, we've got our own problems, right? 138 00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:08,290 Look, Max, when this car slows down, I'm going to get out and kick the shit out 139 00:12:08,290 --> 00:12:10,090 of you. All you have to do is call her. 140 00:12:10,470 --> 00:12:12,790 Tell her I'm sorry and I'll do anything. 141 00:12:13,330 --> 00:12:14,330 Anything she wants. 142 00:12:14,510 --> 00:12:15,670 She'll listen to you, I know. 143 00:12:16,170 --> 00:12:17,119 Tell her. 144 00:12:17,120 --> 00:12:19,320 Tell her I love her and I'm really calm now. 145 00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:27,940 Don't say you know me and talk quick before she puts the phone down. 146 00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:29,380 Who should I say I'm calling? 147 00:12:29,900 --> 00:12:32,760 Just say I'm sorry and that... Is it ringing? 148 00:12:33,360 --> 00:12:35,560 Yeah. Oh, God, she's probably gone jogging. 149 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,100 She's maybe met someone else. 150 00:12:37,460 --> 00:12:38,960 Oh, God, I hope he doesn't answer the phone. 151 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:41,240 Do you think she's met somebody else? 152 00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:42,500 Huh? 153 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:44,300 What's the name? Do you want some money? 154 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:45,229 I've forgotten. 155 00:12:45,230 --> 00:12:47,450 Stop jabbering. Okay, okay. I've shut up. I've shut up. 156 00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:52,950 What's your name? 157 00:12:53,230 --> 00:12:55,090 Philip. Hello, Mr. Philip. 158 00:12:56,010 --> 00:12:58,690 You don't know me. My name's Andrew Taylor. 159 00:12:58,930 --> 00:12:59,930 Hey, what? 160 00:13:03,290 --> 00:13:04,290 No, 161 00:13:07,670 --> 00:13:08,589 no, he's alive. 162 00:13:08,590 --> 00:13:09,549 Have some more money. 163 00:13:09,550 --> 00:13:10,550 Do you want to do this? 164 00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:11,790 No, don't do it. I'm sorry. 165 00:13:21,260 --> 00:13:24,260 Yeah, it's just if you really, really can't talk to him, Mrs. Phillips, then 166 00:13:24,260 --> 00:13:27,200 he's very likely to kill not only himself, but me and my boyfriend as 167 00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:30,440 No, no, it's the way he drives. 168 00:13:31,540 --> 00:13:33,860 Yeah, I agree, he's the stuff and does it, little William. 169 00:13:34,140 --> 00:13:37,100 Just say I'm sorry, and I've really changed. 170 00:13:37,820 --> 00:13:39,480 Yeah, yeah, keep saying you're sorry. 171 00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:45,320 Right, here's Max. Bye. 172 00:14:15,150 --> 00:14:16,890 You're from London. We've broken down. Did you have breakfast? 173 00:14:17,630 --> 00:14:19,030 No. No, sorry. 174 00:14:22,690 --> 00:14:25,130 I'm sorry. I know it's a cheek and everything, but, you know, we're really 175 00:14:25,130 --> 00:14:26,730 hungry. We'll pay you. 176 00:14:29,890 --> 00:14:30,890 Well, all right, then. 177 00:14:31,170 --> 00:14:32,870 I haven't got very much. Come in. 178 00:14:59,790 --> 00:15:03,330 since our accident, do we, Franny? She hates me calling her Franny. 179 00:15:03,630 --> 00:15:06,210 Her real name's Frances, but I call her Franny. 180 00:15:08,890 --> 00:15:10,110 You a chicken farmer? 181 00:15:10,550 --> 00:15:12,010 No, I'm a PE instructor. 182 00:15:12,830 --> 00:15:14,210 May I use the bathroom, please? 183 00:15:14,530 --> 00:15:15,610 Yes, it's through there. 184 00:15:16,190 --> 00:15:17,370 Oh, you've cut your hand. 185 00:15:17,890 --> 00:15:19,070 Yeah, it's nothing very much. 186 00:15:19,930 --> 00:15:23,250 What was it, a head -on collision? Or did you smash into a tree, blind drunk? 187 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:30,220 been drinking, you see, heavily. 188 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:32,560 And Franny said, oh, I'll drive home. 189 00:15:32,860 --> 00:15:33,900 Next thing, crash! 190 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:35,280 I lost both legs. 191 00:15:35,780 --> 00:15:37,740 Still, at least she lost her licence. 192 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:41,760 Well, 193 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,000 what do you do? 194 00:15:44,080 --> 00:15:45,080 I'm a typist. 195 00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:46,980 Oh, really? I thought you were a prostitute. 196 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:50,760 Charming. How much do you charge? Do you take a cheque, do you? 197 00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:52,640 Tim, stop it! 198 00:15:53,020 --> 00:15:54,320 Tim, stop it! 199 00:15:54,540 --> 00:15:56,140 Tim, stop it! 200 00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:58,140 Tim, stop it! 201 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,060 That's a typical Franny remark. 202 00:16:00,720 --> 00:16:02,420 Franny's a nymphomaniac too, aren't you, Franny? 203 00:16:03,220 --> 00:16:04,740 Aren't you a nymphomaniac, Franny? 204 00:16:06,140 --> 00:16:07,920 She'd kill me if she thought she'd get away with it. 205 00:16:10,740 --> 00:16:14,140 Would you mind cutting some bread for me? 206 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:17,560 Breakfast is very nearly ready. 207 00:16:20,020 --> 00:16:21,740 Ah, the pimp. 208 00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:24,940 I was just talking to your call girlfriend about doing it in doorways. 209 00:16:27,150 --> 00:16:29,230 Well, I must say, you're a gutless little swine, aren't you? 210 00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:33,870 You scratchy, loathsome piece of filth with your diseased trollop. 211 00:16:35,210 --> 00:16:36,210 Pimp! 212 00:16:36,570 --> 00:16:37,910 Whore! Pimp! 213 00:16:38,670 --> 00:16:43,490 Whore! Pimp! Whore! Pimp! Whore! Pimp! Whore! Pimp! Whore! 214 00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:45,090 Whore! Whore! Whore! 215 00:16:46,370 --> 00:16:51,370 Sorry about that, kids. Too good a chance to miss. 216 00:17:49,699 --> 00:17:50,699 Milk go. 217 00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:53,200 You just leave it outside. 218 00:17:53,400 --> 00:17:55,960 That'll be fine. Would you mind signing this order form? 219 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:57,840 I'm on holiday next week, you see. 220 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,640 I'm going to tell you something now. 221 00:18:04,020 --> 00:18:05,940 I don't want you to react in any way. Do you understand? 222 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:07,680 Don't beg your pardon? 223 00:18:07,740 --> 00:18:09,740 I'm a police officer and I'm aware of your situation. 224 00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:10,960 Do you follow? 225 00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:12,220 Oh, yes. 226 00:18:12,580 --> 00:18:14,300 Just answer this next question, yes or no. 227 00:18:15,180 --> 00:18:16,180 Are they inside? 228 00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:19,120 Are they in the immediate vicinity? 229 00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:21,100 Yes. 230 00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:24,800 Right. Just relax. Everything's under control. 231 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,760 I'd just like you to take two steps backwards into the house. 232 00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:32,080 Good girl. 233 00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:33,860 You're doing very well there. 234 00:18:34,540 --> 00:18:35,540 Francis. 235 00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:37,000 Lovely name for a lovely lady. 236 00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:38,900 Thank you. 237 00:18:43,020 --> 00:18:45,540 Now, Franny, what I want you to do... 238 00:18:45,940 --> 00:18:49,760 is without looking or pointing in any way, I want you to tell me exactly where 239 00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:50,759 they are. 240 00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:52,500 They're in the mini. 241 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:55,600 Good. 242 00:18:56,140 --> 00:18:57,720 So it's two pints tomorrow, is it? 243 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:00,720 Yes! 244 00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:02,640 The mini. 245 00:19:03,660 --> 00:19:04,660 The mini. 246 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:07,060 Just one for you to sign for, madam. 247 00:19:08,120 --> 00:19:10,800 Right, Fran, what I want you to do now is to go into your living room. 248 00:19:11,540 --> 00:19:12,540 Yes. You got that? 249 00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:15,020 Now, have you got any thick cushions or a rug in there? 250 00:19:18,190 --> 00:19:19,190 I've got a duvet. 251 00:19:19,290 --> 00:19:20,830 Oh, that'll do the trick. They're nice, aren't they? 252 00:19:21,190 --> 00:19:22,670 Better than making the old bed every day. 253 00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:25,110 Yes, I'd never go back to sheets and blankets. 254 00:19:26,090 --> 00:19:27,090 Right. 255 00:19:27,210 --> 00:19:30,530 Now, Fran, what I want you to do is to go into your living room and lie on the 256 00:19:30,530 --> 00:19:32,510 floor with the duvet over you. Have you got that? 257 00:19:33,190 --> 00:19:36,510 Yes. Now, in a few moments, you're going to hear a bit of a bang. 258 00:19:37,150 --> 00:19:41,270 So I'd like you to stay in that position until myself or a fellow officer gives 259 00:19:41,270 --> 00:19:42,270 you the all -clear. 260 00:19:43,830 --> 00:19:44,830 Is that understood? 261 00:19:45,150 --> 00:19:46,510 Yes. Good girl. 262 00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:48,440 Off you go then. 263 00:19:49,660 --> 00:19:50,800 Be careful. 264 00:19:53,340 --> 00:19:54,420 Stand by. 265 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:19,239 Up hand, Gina. 266 00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:20,240 You're not kidding. 267 00:22:15,530 --> 00:22:16,530 Nice date? 268 00:22:16,590 --> 00:22:18,350 Yes, yes, absolutely splendid, yes. 269 00:22:18,610 --> 00:22:19,770 Jolly top hell, Bungee. 270 00:22:20,130 --> 00:22:21,130 Bagged anything? 271 00:22:21,210 --> 00:22:22,230 No, no, no, no, no. 272 00:22:23,350 --> 00:22:24,350 Not yet. 273 00:22:28,050 --> 00:22:29,050 Good afternoon. 274 00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:30,130 This is a robbery. 275 00:22:33,110 --> 00:22:34,610 Pipe down, old chap. 276 00:22:35,110 --> 00:22:38,990 I'll splash your brains right across that wonderful antique counter. 277 00:23:52,699 --> 00:23:54,740 Can we have your best double room, please? 278 00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,220 Well, they're all the same. 279 00:23:57,480 --> 00:24:00,480 Now, look, we've got a load of bread and we're used to good treatment, so what 280 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:02,580 we want is champagne and special service. 281 00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:05,640 I'm sorry. We don't provide that type of extra. 282 00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:06,920 You don't? 283 00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:09,040 Look. 284 00:24:10,360 --> 00:24:11,360 See, dear? 285 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:19,280 If we get what we want, you... 286 00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:55,760 Well, if that's the case, I'll have two steaks, all the trimmings. 287 00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:57,540 Yeah, yeah, champagne. 288 00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:02,180 Half a dozen cigars and some flowers, please. Thank you. 289 00:25:03,860 --> 00:25:04,860 There, see? 290 00:25:05,100 --> 00:25:06,100 Money talk. 291 00:25:07,540 --> 00:25:12,320 The hunt is still continuing for the so -called heart attack taxi thief. And 292 00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:16,120 today the police were piecing together the amazing trail of the wanted 293 00:25:16,500 --> 00:25:17,700 Dave Hallihan reports. 294 00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:22,820 It was 10 .30 yesterday morning on this quiet Victorian estate when the wanted 295 00:25:22,820 --> 00:25:26,320 man burst into the home of playwright William Schooney, who lives alone. 296 00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:30,880 I was aware that at any moment this man was likely to slit my throat from ear to 297 00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:32,500 ear. How did you react? 298 00:25:32,860 --> 00:25:37,220 Well, he was ranting to me about how he was going to get Mrs Thatcher. 299 00:25:37,460 --> 00:25:39,780 I pretended to agree with him. 300 00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:46,760 He then smashed his way through this window here using that chair 301 00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:47,760 there. 302 00:25:48,780 --> 00:25:53,360 The wanted man then hijacked a black taxi cab from this man, John Trower, now 303 00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:54,900 hospital recovering from a heart attack. 304 00:25:55,340 --> 00:25:56,560 I was seconds. 305 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:00,640 I was literally seconds away from death. 306 00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:06,580 This kind of incident is happening more and more. And I think the government 307 00:26:06,580 --> 00:26:10,640 should wake up and realise that taxi drivers should be armed. 308 00:26:12,260 --> 00:26:13,420 Like the police. 309 00:26:21,290 --> 00:26:23,690 encountered the fugitive was actor Alan Peele. 310 00:26:24,530 --> 00:26:27,290 Well, he seemed quite nice, really. 311 00:26:27,530 --> 00:26:31,850 And when the police told me he was a vicious armed robber, well, I was 312 00:26:32,430 --> 00:26:33,430 Were you frightened? 313 00:26:33,990 --> 00:26:38,110 No, not at all. Like I'd go and see him in prison if he wants me to. 314 00:26:42,410 --> 00:26:46,950 Then he put a hole in my ceiling and said he was going to splash my brains 315 00:26:46,950 --> 00:26:47,950 over the counter. 316 00:26:50,420 --> 00:26:53,900 Violent stabbing that resulted in the death of a cripple on a deserted chicken 317 00:26:53,900 --> 00:26:56,300 farm in the area. He's now thought to be... 318 00:26:56,300 --> 00:27:01,880 Come in. 319 00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:16,660 Married for the champagne, sir? 320 00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:17,960 That's a good idea. 321 00:27:20,430 --> 00:27:21,430 You were here on holiday? 322 00:27:22,230 --> 00:27:23,230 Yeah. 323 00:27:30,190 --> 00:27:32,390 Some very nice Norman churches around here. 324 00:27:33,810 --> 00:27:35,550 Are you interested in churches, sir? 325 00:27:36,850 --> 00:27:41,210 Why? Oh, no reason. I just find religion particularly comforting in times of 326 00:27:41,210 --> 00:27:42,210 stress. 327 00:27:44,310 --> 00:27:47,530 You know, I think it helps to be philosophical when facing human issues 328 00:27:47,530 --> 00:27:49,030 death, for instance. 329 00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:51,960 What are you talking about? 330 00:27:52,380 --> 00:27:53,380 You both want cabbage? 331 00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:55,860 Nothing you've done with before. 332 00:27:56,700 --> 00:27:58,760 Really? Where was that, do you think? 333 00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:11,880 Hold it. Don't move. 334 00:28:12,320 --> 00:28:13,340 Get away from the trolley. 335 00:28:15,020 --> 00:28:16,360 Get your hands up in the air. 336 00:28:18,120 --> 00:28:19,120 What's going on? 337 00:28:19,220 --> 00:28:20,220 That's the milk policeman. 338 00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:21,720 What? 339 00:28:21,860 --> 00:28:23,460 Gino's quite right, Andy. I'm a police officer. 340 00:28:23,760 --> 00:28:24,760 Get your hands up. 341 00:28:26,620 --> 00:28:27,620 Get a gun. 342 00:28:36,980 --> 00:28:38,960 I was just thinking on my way up here, Gino. 343 00:28:39,660 --> 00:28:40,840 I thought, what's the boy done? 344 00:28:41,480 --> 00:28:44,340 He's robbed a post office, stolen a few cars. 345 00:28:44,660 --> 00:28:45,820 And I thought, what's that worth? 346 00:28:46,460 --> 00:28:47,460 About five years. 347 00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:50,260 Maybe three years with... Good behaviour. 348 00:28:57,200 --> 00:29:02,180 Out there, Gino, there are 50 armed bully boys offering certain death in the 349 00:29:02,180 --> 00:29:03,600 event of an injury to a fellow officer. 350 00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:06,460 So I thought, what would I do in your position? 351 00:29:07,100 --> 00:29:09,660 Come down the station for a chat or die in a hail of bullets? 352 00:29:10,260 --> 00:29:11,260 Yeah. 353 00:29:11,620 --> 00:29:13,720 I thought you did that many, you arsehole. 354 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:16,020 Then I thought, you lucky bastard. 355 00:29:17,300 --> 00:29:18,300 What a celebrity. 356 00:29:20,669 --> 00:29:22,090 Papers queuing to buy your story. 357 00:29:23,030 --> 00:29:24,310 You know, checkbook journalism. 358 00:29:25,350 --> 00:29:27,510 Film producers paying thousands for the film rights. 359 00:29:28,530 --> 00:29:31,370 I thought that's crime for you. Three years in the nick, you wind up a 360 00:29:31,370 --> 00:29:32,370 millionaire. 24714