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1
00:00:58,602 --> 00:00:59,895
Michael?
2
00:01:02,981 --> 00:01:05,859
What are you doing out here, son?
It's after midnight.
3
00:01:06,026 --> 00:01:07,444
Couldn't sleep, Pops.
4
00:01:07,611 --> 00:01:10,447
Well, neither can we,
with all that noise you're making.
5
00:01:10,614 --> 00:01:11,782
Come on, let's go inside.
6
00:01:12,366 --> 00:01:14,243
Just one more shot?
7
00:01:15,994 --> 00:01:18,121
All right. Just one.
8
00:01:18,247 --> 00:01:19,706
Yeah.
9
00:01:22,084 --> 00:01:24,461
That's good. Shoot it again.
10
00:01:28,006 --> 00:01:31,385
Getting pretty good, son.
Go ahead, shoot till you miss.
11
00:01:31,552 --> 00:01:33,804
You think if I can get good enough,
I can go to college?
12
00:01:33,929 --> 00:01:34,930
Hey...
13
00:01:36,849 --> 00:01:40,352
...if you get good enough,
you can do anything you want to, Michael.
14
00:01:41,103 --> 00:01:43,438
I want to play at North Carolina.
15
00:01:45,190 --> 00:01:47,234
That's a real fine school.
Real fine school.
16
00:01:47,401 --> 00:01:49,444
You can get a first-class education there.
17
00:01:49,611 --> 00:01:51,989
I want to play on a championship team.
18
00:01:52,906 --> 00:01:55,409
Then I want to play in the NBA.
19
00:01:57,786 --> 00:02:00,205
All right, let's slow down, son.
20
00:02:00,330 --> 00:02:02,499
Don't you think you ought
to get a little sleep first?
21
00:02:02,666 --> 00:02:04,376
- And once I've done all that...
- Uh-huh.
22
00:02:04,543 --> 00:02:06,712
...I want to play baseball,
just like you, Dad.
23
00:02:06,879 --> 00:02:09,673
Baseball. Now, that's a sport.
24
00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:13,635
And when you're finished with that,
I suppose you're gonna fly, huh?
25
00:05:37,965 --> 00:05:39,716
I just feel at this particular time...
26
00:05:39,883 --> 00:05:43,554
...that I reached the, uh, pinnacle of
my basketball career and I must retire.
27
00:05:44,847 --> 00:05:48,142
The one good thing that comes out of this
is that my father had the opportunity...
28
00:05:48,308 --> 00:05:51,854
...to see me play my last basketball game,
and that means a lot to me.
29
00:05:51,979 --> 00:05:53,647
What are you gonna do now?
30
00:05:53,814 --> 00:05:57,818
Well, I've never really told anybody this,
except for one person, and, uh...
31
00:05:57,985 --> 00:05:59,945
But I think I'm gonna go play
professional baseball.
32
00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:04,575
- What position will you play?
- I don't know. As a kid, I was a pitcher.
33
00:06:04,741 --> 00:06:08,829
I think that would be kind of hard for me
to pitch, so I'm gonna play the outfield.
34
00:06:55,417 --> 00:06:57,002
Woo-hoo!
35
00:06:58,921 --> 00:07:00,964
Let's get out of here, Dad. This stinks.
36
00:07:01,131 --> 00:07:03,008
Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
37
00:07:03,175 --> 00:07:06,303
- Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
Are you listening?
38
00:07:06,470 --> 00:07:11,058
Did you hear him? Did you hear him?
That little brat is right.
39
00:07:11,225 --> 00:07:13,477
I've told you, if I've told you once...
40
00:07:13,644 --> 00:07:17,731
...I told you a thousand, thousand,
thousand, thousand times.
41
00:07:17,898 --> 00:07:19,817
We need new attractions.
42
00:07:20,192 --> 00:07:21,151
- Right.
- New ones.
43
00:07:21,318 --> 00:07:22,319
Uh-huh.
44
00:07:22,486 --> 00:07:24,571
- Get it?
- Big, shiny new things, yeah.
45
00:07:24,738 --> 00:07:27,324
- Absolutely, sir.
- Look at me. Look at me and listen.
46
00:07:28,033 --> 00:07:29,243
The customer is always right.
47
00:07:30,577 --> 00:07:33,372
Right.
- The customer is always right.
48
00:07:33,539 --> 00:07:34,957
Exactly.
49
00:07:35,124 --> 00:07:36,583
Always.
50
00:07:37,918 --> 00:07:38,919
Right.
51
00:07:39,086 --> 00:07:41,547
- Okay, we need something...
My bad.
52
00:07:41,713 --> 00:07:42,923
We need something...
53
00:07:44,508 --> 00:07:46,552
...nutty.
- Nutty.
54
00:07:46,718 --> 00:07:48,762
- Something wacky.
Wacky.
55
00:07:48,929 --> 00:07:51,390
We need something, something...
Something... We need something...
56
00:07:51,557 --> 00:07:53,142
Looney? Oops.
57
00:07:53,308 --> 00:07:54,434
Looney. Thank you.
58
00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:55,853
Looney?
59
00:07:58,105 --> 00:08:00,440
I'm an elk. Shoot me.
60
00:08:04,820 --> 00:08:06,780
Yes. Looney. Yes.
61
00:08:06,905 --> 00:08:10,450
Now you're talking.
Looney. Looney. That's it.
62
00:08:10,617 --> 00:08:12,995
That's the word I was looking for.
Looney.
63
00:08:13,162 --> 00:08:15,330
- Get the Looney Tunes.
- Looney Tunes!
64
00:08:15,497 --> 00:08:19,084
- Bring them here.
Sir. Just noticing, sir.
65
00:08:19,251 --> 00:08:22,045
They're from Earth.
What if they can't come?
66
00:08:22,546 --> 00:08:25,757
What did you say?
What if they can't come?
67
00:08:27,134 --> 00:08:29,052
- Make them.
- Cool.
68
00:08:29,553 --> 00:08:31,013
Make them. Ha-ha-ha.
69
00:08:31,180 --> 00:08:34,725
We're gonna go get them. Yeah. All right.
70
00:08:42,941 --> 00:08:44,485
Strike!
71
00:08:47,613 --> 00:08:48,864
Looks good in that uniform.
72
00:08:49,031 --> 00:08:51,241
Looks great. Can't teach that.
73
00:08:51,408 --> 00:08:52,367
Can't teach it.
74
00:08:52,534 --> 00:08:55,579
Thanks for autographing that basketball
for my kid. I'm a hero now.
75
00:08:55,704 --> 00:08:57,206
No problem. Happy to do it, man.
76
00:08:57,372 --> 00:08:58,916
Let's go!
77
00:09:02,294 --> 00:09:04,671
Curve ball. Don't swing.
78
00:09:05,631 --> 00:09:07,549
Don't swing.
79
00:09:14,598 --> 00:09:16,058
Ball!
80
00:09:19,603 --> 00:09:21,939
Fastball, outside corner. Swing.
81
00:09:26,860 --> 00:09:28,904
Strike!
82
00:09:29,029 --> 00:09:30,155
That was your pitch.
83
00:09:30,322 --> 00:09:31,573
I know, I missed it.
84
00:09:32,157 --> 00:09:34,576
Don't worry. I'll get you another one.
85
00:09:37,329 --> 00:09:39,706
Podolak. Podolak, come here.
86
00:09:39,873 --> 00:09:40,999
Sorry, I didn't mean to...
87
00:09:41,166 --> 00:09:43,669
- Come here.
- Yes, sir?
88
00:09:43,836 --> 00:09:47,756
Make sure nobody bothers Michael. I want
him to be the happiest player in the world.
89
00:09:47,923 --> 00:09:49,007
The happiest.
90
00:09:50,092 --> 00:09:52,344
Slider. Don't swing.
91
00:09:57,182 --> 00:09:58,475
Strike three!
92
00:09:58,642 --> 00:09:59,726
I told you not to swing.
93
00:09:59,893 --> 00:10:00,978
I couldn't help it.
94
00:10:01,145 --> 00:10:03,188
I understand. Hey, nice talking to you.
95
00:10:10,904 --> 00:10:12,698
We're not worried. We're not worried.
96
00:10:16,118 --> 00:10:18,537
Good job, Mike.
Good hustle.
97
00:10:18,704 --> 00:10:19,997
Good cut, Michael. Good cut.
98
00:10:20,164 --> 00:10:22,916
That was a strikeout, Mike?
Good-looking strikeout. Real good.
99
00:10:23,083 --> 00:10:26,128
You look good when you strike out.
When I strike out, it looks nasty, man.
100
00:10:26,295 --> 00:10:28,547
At least you look good, man.
Good-looking.
101
00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:31,258
Hi, Mr. Jordan.
102
00:10:32,050 --> 00:10:33,886
Mr. Jordan, I'm Stan Podolak...
103
00:10:37,931 --> 00:10:40,434
Oh, jeez.
104
00:10:43,437 --> 00:10:47,107
- You all right? That was a nasty fall.
- Yeah.
105
00:10:47,232 --> 00:10:51,361
Oh. I'm Stan Podolak, Mr. Jordan.
I'm the Barons' new publicist.
106
00:10:52,488 --> 00:10:55,741
I'm here to make your life easier.
Want me to drive you somewhere?
107
00:10:55,908 --> 00:10:59,119
Want me to pick up your laundry,
babysit your kids? I will do it.
108
00:10:59,286 --> 00:11:04,708
I am here to personally guarantee
that no one will ever bother you.
109
00:11:13,550 --> 00:11:14,551
What was that?
110
00:11:19,723 --> 00:11:20,724
Hang on.
111
00:11:20,891 --> 00:11:23,769
- Hanging on.
- Hanging on.
112
00:11:23,936 --> 00:11:25,896
BLANKO:
Are we there yet?
113
00:11:33,821 --> 00:11:35,239
- Bombastic.
- Cool.
114
00:11:46,083 --> 00:11:48,001
All right, you irascible bunny.
115
00:11:48,168 --> 00:11:50,295
Come back here, you screwy rodent.
116
00:11:50,462 --> 00:11:54,758
I'll, uh, be with you in a second, folks,
after I finish with nature boy here.
117
00:11:54,925 --> 00:11:58,470
All right, you pesky rabbit.
I've got you now.
118
00:12:00,389 --> 00:12:01,890
Ouch!
119
00:12:02,432 --> 00:12:03,433
Hmm.
120
00:12:05,978 --> 00:12:09,106
One small step for moi...
121
00:12:09,231 --> 00:12:11,984
One giant leap for Moron Mountain.
122
00:12:14,111 --> 00:12:16,405
And one whopper headache for
Elmer Fudd.
123
00:12:20,868 --> 00:12:22,786
Diminutive, ain't they?
124
00:12:22,911 --> 00:12:25,706
- We seek the one they call Bugs Bunny.
- Yeah, Bugs Bunny.
125
00:12:25,831 --> 00:12:27,624
- Have you seen him?
- Where is this guy?
126
00:12:27,791 --> 00:12:29,501
Is he around?
127
00:12:29,668 --> 00:12:32,921
Hmm. Bugs Bunny, Bugs Bunny.
128
00:12:33,088 --> 00:12:35,966
Say, does he have, uh,
great big long ears?
129
00:12:36,133 --> 00:12:38,469
- Like this?
- Yeah. Yeah.
130
00:12:38,594 --> 00:12:41,555
And does he hop around like this?
131
00:12:44,933 --> 00:12:46,435
- Yeah.
- Well, uh...
132
00:12:46,602 --> 00:12:48,770
...does he say, "What's up, doc?"
Like this:
133
00:12:50,898 --> 00:12:53,942
- Eh, what's up, doc?
- Yeah!
134
00:12:54,109 --> 00:12:56,028
Nope. Never heard of him.
135
00:12:58,572 --> 00:13:03,619
You know, maybe there is no intelligent life
out there in the universe after all.
136
00:13:07,122 --> 00:13:10,167
Hold on there, Mr. Looney Tune.
137
00:13:10,334 --> 00:13:12,503
Hey, what do you think we are, stupid?
138
00:13:12,669 --> 00:13:15,047
Don't move a muscle.
139
00:13:15,714 --> 00:13:19,384
Okay, bunny, gather up your Tune pals.
140
00:13:19,551 --> 00:13:22,346
- We're taking you for a ride. Ha, ha.
NAWT: Move it, mister.
141
00:13:22,513 --> 00:13:25,849
Totally. All right.
So, like, where are we going?
142
00:13:29,645 --> 00:13:31,563
Are we there yet?
143
00:13:31,855 --> 00:13:33,816
Sorry it took so long.
Don't worry.
144
00:13:33,982 --> 00:13:37,027
That exit wasn't clearly marked.
Hold up, right here.
145
00:13:37,194 --> 00:13:38,570
What, here?
Yes.
146
00:13:43,283 --> 00:13:45,118
Thanks for the ride, Sherm.
Appreciate it.
147
00:13:45,285 --> 00:13:46,995
- It's Stan, Mike.
- Sorry.
148
00:13:47,162 --> 00:13:50,457
But you can call me Sherm if you want to.
I've followed your whole career.
149
00:13:50,624 --> 00:13:53,377
- You're the greatest athlete that's ever lived.
- Stan, Stan, Stan.
150
00:13:54,670 --> 00:13:56,547
How do I get out?
The door doesn't work.
151
00:13:56,713 --> 00:13:59,591
- I'm sorry. I forgot... It's a classic.
- Oh, yeah.
152
00:13:59,716 --> 00:14:03,262
It's a classic, but it's got a few
peccadilloes. Hold on just a second.
153
00:14:03,428 --> 00:14:06,473
A few, huh? It's smoking, too, man.
You need to get that checked.
154
00:14:08,475 --> 00:14:09,977
Thanks for the ride.
155
00:14:10,144 --> 00:14:11,562
Oh.
156
00:14:11,895 --> 00:14:14,606
Oh, this is nice. This is a nice house.
157
00:14:14,773 --> 00:14:16,775
That is a beauty. What is that, Colonial?
158
00:14:16,942 --> 00:14:18,152
It's a nice house.
159
00:14:18,277 --> 00:14:20,529
If you need anything done
around the house, I'd be happy...
160
00:14:20,696 --> 00:14:22,739
- Oh, no, I'm fine, thanks.
- Anything you need.
161
00:14:22,906 --> 00:14:24,825
- You gave me a ride. I appreciate it.
- Sure.
162
00:14:24,992 --> 00:14:27,369
Tomorrow I'm gonna drive, okay?
So I don't need the ride.
163
00:14:28,370 --> 00:14:29,830
But thanks, though.
164
00:14:29,997 --> 00:14:31,039
Too conspicuous?
165
00:14:32,416 --> 00:14:33,500
Yeah.
166
00:14:35,127 --> 00:14:38,172
- All right. All right.
- Thanks, though.
167
00:14:38,338 --> 00:14:40,549
- Tomorrow.
- See you tomorrow.
168
00:14:48,390 --> 00:14:50,142
Come on, dog. No, not today.
169
00:14:51,477 --> 00:14:53,061
Dog, get off me. Your breath.
170
00:14:53,228 --> 00:14:55,105
- Mr. Jordan, are you okay?
- Get off of me!
171
00:14:55,272 --> 00:14:56,398
Get off of him, Charles.
172
00:14:56,565 --> 00:14:58,567
- Bad dog. Git.
- Get off of him.
173
00:14:58,734 --> 00:15:01,320
- Get off me, Charles.
- Get off of him before I cook you.
174
00:15:01,487 --> 00:15:04,114
Come on, come on.
Come on, baby. Come on.
175
00:15:10,621 --> 00:15:12,080
Get out of the car!
176
00:15:14,666 --> 00:15:16,251
Good game.
177
00:15:17,002 --> 00:15:18,587
Hey, Jeff, you okay?
178
00:15:24,635 --> 00:15:26,470
- How was your game?
JEFF: I don't want to talk.
179
00:15:26,637 --> 00:15:28,222
- Hi, Dad.
Hey, hey.
180
00:15:28,388 --> 00:15:30,724
Michael!
181
00:15:32,392 --> 00:15:34,603
- Daddy, Daddy!
- How you doing?
182
00:15:34,770 --> 00:15:37,022
Hey.
Hey.
183
00:15:37,773 --> 00:15:40,734
- Ooh. You're all covered with drool, baby.
- That's your dog.
184
00:15:40,901 --> 00:15:43,111
- What's wrong with Jeff?
- He went two for five...
185
00:15:43,278 --> 00:15:45,280
...lost 32 points in his average.
- Is that all?
186
00:15:45,447 --> 00:15:48,534
Yeah, so that puts him at like a.685
or something.
187
00:15:48,700 --> 00:15:50,285
He's batting what?
188
00:15:50,661 --> 00:15:53,455
Mm.
Smells good in here. What you cooking?
189
00:15:53,622 --> 00:15:56,375
Chicken.
- Chicken and what?
190
00:15:56,542 --> 00:15:59,253
- Chicken and collard greens.
- Good. I'm gonna need a good meal tonight.
191
00:16:02,631 --> 00:16:03,757
Is everything okay?
192
00:16:04,091 --> 00:16:07,302
I stunk up the place.
I hope this baseball thing was a good idea.
193
00:16:07,469 --> 00:16:10,556
It was another career day for Michael Jordan
at Barons Field this afternoon.
194
00:16:10,681 --> 00:16:11,890
Let's face it. This baseball...
195
00:16:12,057 --> 00:16:13,892
What are you guys watching?
196
00:16:14,059 --> 00:16:16,812
- Today he had three strikeouts.
- Is this the only thing on TV?
197
00:16:16,979 --> 00:16:19,648
- That brings his batting average down...
- What's up with this?
198
00:16:19,815 --> 00:16:21,942
...to an anemic.214,
which is also his weight.
199
00:16:22,109 --> 00:16:25,696
Baseball bat?
Get this guy a tennis racquet.
200
00:16:25,863 --> 00:16:27,698
Did everyone get mad at you?
201
00:16:28,824 --> 00:16:31,785
No. Worse.
Everyone was real nice about it.
202
00:16:31,952 --> 00:16:35,330
Michael, I know golf is your sport,
but not here.
203
00:16:35,497 --> 00:16:37,624
I think you should open up
your stance a little.
204
00:16:37,791 --> 00:16:39,960
It might make you more aggressive
at the plate.
205
00:16:40,085 --> 00:16:44,339
- You think so? I'll try to remember that.
- Watching this hurts me more than you.
206
00:16:44,506 --> 00:16:48,260
What are you guys doing
watching this stuff? It's bad for you.
207
00:16:53,974 --> 00:16:58,395
There you go. Road Runner. Beep, beep.
208
00:17:04,193 --> 00:17:06,862
Oh. Stop this cartoon.
209
00:17:08,780 --> 00:17:14,161
We've got an emergency
Cartoon Character Union Meeting to go to.
210
00:17:15,078 --> 00:17:18,957
Hey, wait for me. Hold your horses.
211
00:17:25,047 --> 00:17:26,882
Dang. Where'd they go?
212
00:17:33,555 --> 00:17:36,266
- Stop the music. Top duck coming through.
Hey!
213
00:17:36,433 --> 00:17:40,229
Jeez. It's getting so a guy can't even
get himself wet around here.
214
00:17:40,395 --> 00:17:42,564
So, what's the big emergency?
215
00:17:42,898 --> 00:17:46,527
Uh, these little guys would like to make
an announcement. Here you go, shorty.
216
00:17:46,693 --> 00:17:48,987
- Go.
- All right, all right.
217
00:17:50,405 --> 00:17:54,785
You, all of you, are now our prisoners.
218
00:17:58,330 --> 00:18:01,333
We're in big trouble now.
219
00:18:02,167 --> 00:18:05,170
We are taking you to our theme park
in outer space.
220
00:18:05,337 --> 00:18:07,756
- No fooling.
- Where you'll be our slaves.
221
00:18:07,923 --> 00:18:11,260
And placed on display for the amusement
of our paying customers.
222
00:18:11,426 --> 00:18:14,138
Oh, fear clutches my breast.
223
00:18:15,973 --> 00:18:19,977
We ain't going nowheres.
224
00:18:25,607 --> 00:18:27,860
Eh, not so fast, doc.
225
00:18:28,026 --> 00:18:30,988
You just can't turn us into slaves.
That would be bad.
226
00:18:31,155 --> 00:18:33,365
You've gotta give us a chance
to defend ourselves.
227
00:18:33,490 --> 00:18:36,034
- Oh, yeah? Who says?
Says who?
228
00:18:36,201 --> 00:18:37,327
Why?
- Just a sec.
229
00:18:38,036 --> 00:18:40,914
- There. Read them and weep.
- What's this?
230
00:18:41,081 --> 00:18:44,293
"Give them a chance
to defend themselves."
231
00:18:44,460 --> 00:18:46,086
Aw. Do we have to?
232
00:18:46,253 --> 00:18:47,629
- It's in the rule book.
- It is.
233
00:18:47,796 --> 00:18:49,882
Okay. It is in the rule book.
234
00:18:51,216 --> 00:18:53,343
We have to confer.
235
00:18:55,762 --> 00:19:01,018
All right, troops. It is for us to choose
a battlefield that affords us...
236
00:19:01,185 --> 00:19:02,728
Oh, I got it.
237
00:19:02,895 --> 00:19:05,314
Yes, Private Porkster?
238
00:19:05,481 --> 00:19:08,233
How about we challenge them to a...
239
00:19:09,193 --> 00:19:10,819
...spelling bee?
- Say...
240
00:19:10,986 --> 00:19:13,030
...we could have a bowling tournament.
241
00:19:14,364 --> 00:19:16,241
Suffering succotash.
242
00:19:16,408 --> 00:19:18,160
What's wrong with all of you?
243
00:19:18,327 --> 00:19:19,745
I say we get a ladder...
244
00:19:19,912 --> 00:19:22,122
...wait till the old lady's out of the room...
245
00:19:22,289 --> 00:19:25,042
...then grab that little bird.
246
00:19:25,209 --> 00:19:28,420
Whoa, whoa, take a deep breath, Sly.
247
00:19:28,587 --> 00:19:32,090
Okay, let's analyze the competition.
248
00:19:32,591 --> 00:19:37,971
Now, uh, what are we looking at here?
We got a small race of invading aliens.
249
00:19:38,138 --> 00:19:41,266
Small arms. Short legs.
250
00:19:41,433 --> 00:19:42,935
Not very fast.
251
00:19:43,101 --> 00:19:44,770
Tiny little guys.
252
00:19:44,937 --> 00:19:47,231
Can't jump high.
253
00:19:47,439 --> 00:19:49,233
Ah.
254
00:19:51,693 --> 00:19:55,197
We challenge you to a basketball game.
255
00:19:55,364 --> 00:19:57,324
All right. Basketball it is.
256
00:19:57,449 --> 00:19:59,117
- Basketball.
- Basketball.
257
00:19:59,284 --> 00:20:01,411
- Boy, oh, boy.
- All right.
258
00:20:01,578 --> 00:20:02,579
What is basketball?
259
00:20:02,746 --> 00:20:03,747
- What's that?
- Beats me.
260
00:20:03,914 --> 00:20:05,332
We didn't have that in school.
261
00:20:05,499 --> 00:20:08,085
- Lights.
Pardon me. Sorry.
262
00:20:08,210 --> 00:20:10,170
Hey! Down in front.
263
00:20:10,295 --> 00:20:12,339
An exhilarating team sport...
264
00:20:12,506 --> 00:20:16,927
...currently growing rapidly in popularity
is basketball.
265
00:20:17,052 --> 00:20:21,682
Unlike football and baseball,
only five men can play on a team.
266
00:20:21,849 --> 00:20:26,311
It's a fast-paced, razzle-dazzle game
that requires quick wits...
267
00:20:26,478 --> 00:20:28,730
...and even faster reflexes.
268
00:20:29,231 --> 00:20:31,608
Here's how it's done
in the professional ranks...
269
00:20:31,733 --> 00:20:37,030
...the National Basketball Association,
featuring the best players in the world.
270
00:20:37,197 --> 00:20:40,742
- The best players in the world.
- The best.
271
00:20:59,803 --> 00:21:01,889
Excuse me. Oh, so sorry.
272
00:21:02,014 --> 00:21:03,432
Excuse me.
273
00:21:04,266 --> 00:21:05,851
Ow. Get your feet out of my nose.
274
00:21:05,976 --> 00:21:07,895
Quiet, they're looking.
275
00:21:08,061 --> 00:21:11,273
Hey, it's basketball.
276
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:13,734
Where?
Whoa. Now what?
277
00:21:17,571 --> 00:21:18,614
Hey, hey!
What?
278
00:21:18,739 --> 00:21:20,532
She's looking again.
Close it up.
279
00:21:20,657 --> 00:21:22,034
- Tightly.
- Aah.
280
00:21:22,201 --> 00:21:23,660
You poked me again.
281
00:21:25,370 --> 00:21:26,413
- Sweetheart?
- What?
282
00:21:26,538 --> 00:21:29,500
- I thought you'd get better seats.
- This is as good as I could get.
283
00:21:29,666 --> 00:21:32,795
This guy next to me is doing something
very weird in his raincoat.
284
00:21:32,961 --> 00:21:35,881
Honey, will you just let me watch the game?
Barkley's killing us.
285
00:21:36,215 --> 00:21:38,342
Hey, someone's killing someone.
286
00:21:38,509 --> 00:21:40,135
No. Seriously?
287
00:21:40,511 --> 00:21:42,763
Wow, a killer.
Let me see.
288
00:21:44,890 --> 00:21:46,517
There. That's him, the killer.
289
00:21:48,435 --> 00:21:49,561
He's big.
290
00:21:49,728 --> 00:21:51,396
He's good.
291
00:21:51,563 --> 00:21:52,731
He's mine.
292
00:21:52,856 --> 00:21:55,150
Okay, go get him.
Yeah.
293
00:22:07,913 --> 00:22:11,959
Get back on defense.
Let's go. Get back on defense, man.
294
00:22:16,964 --> 00:22:18,882
What are you doing?
295
00:22:26,348 --> 00:22:28,016
Time out. Call time out.
296
00:22:29,309 --> 00:22:31,770
What's wrong with you, man?
You're killing us.
297
00:22:31,937 --> 00:22:34,481
- Let him in. Open up.
- Open.
298
00:22:34,648 --> 00:22:37,234
Wow. He did it.
299
00:22:37,401 --> 00:22:39,862
I got it. I got his talent.
300
00:22:40,028 --> 00:22:41,238
- All right.
- Super.
301
00:22:41,405 --> 00:22:44,199
- Sit down, Chuck.
- Man, I'm fine. I am fine.
302
00:22:44,366 --> 00:22:46,076
No, no. I played you too many minutes.
303
00:22:46,243 --> 00:22:48,912
- But I'm not tired.
- Go get the doctor.
304
00:22:57,671 --> 00:22:59,339
- What's up, man? You all right?
- Yeah.
305
00:22:59,506 --> 00:23:01,175
You sure?
306
00:23:01,925 --> 00:23:05,220
Come on, we're okay.
You're okay. Come on, let's go.
307
00:23:10,767 --> 00:23:12,895
Come on, Patrick. It's showtime.
308
00:23:14,062 --> 00:23:15,397
What's wrong with him?
309
00:23:22,070 --> 00:23:23,447
Popcorn...
310
00:23:23,739 --> 00:23:24,948
In a shocking development...
311
00:23:25,115 --> 00:23:28,702
...five NBA players have been placed
on the disabled list in the last 24 hours...
312
00:23:28,869 --> 00:23:31,079
...all suffering from the same
mysterious ailment.
313
00:23:31,246 --> 00:23:32,748
- Yeah? Hmm.
- Whatever this mystery is...
314
00:23:32,915 --> 00:23:36,376
...it affects the player's coordination.
- I'll be home in a couple days.
315
00:23:36,502 --> 00:23:38,670
- Watch Patrick Ewing.
- Put your mom on the phone.
316
00:23:40,255 --> 00:23:42,966
- It wasn't just in New York.
- Hey, baby. How you doing?
317
00:23:43,133 --> 00:23:46,720
- Check out the highlights.
- You watching TV?
318
00:23:48,639 --> 00:23:50,015
What the hell is going on?
319
00:23:50,140 --> 00:23:54,728
- You gonna be all right?
- I'm ready, coach. All right.
320
00:23:55,312 --> 00:23:57,231
Looks like I retired just in time.
321
00:23:59,107 --> 00:24:03,612
All right, baby, gotta go.
I'll call you later, okay? Love you. Bye.
322
00:24:03,779 --> 00:24:04,780
It's open!
323
00:24:05,239 --> 00:24:08,200
Come on, it's game time.
Get your Hanes on. Lace up your Nikes.
324
00:24:08,367 --> 00:24:11,662
Grab your Wheaties and your Gatorade
and we'll pick up a Big Mac on the way.
325
00:24:11,829 --> 00:24:14,123
Now we take you live
to the Forum in Los Angeles...
326
00:24:14,289 --> 00:24:16,500
...where the Lakers are refusing
to take the court.
327
00:24:19,253 --> 00:24:20,295
Guys, we gotta get dressed.
328
00:24:20,420 --> 00:24:24,091
We got a game in five minutes.
I mean, we're talking about a huge fine here.
329
00:24:24,258 --> 00:24:26,260
- No, we can't go in the locker room.
- Oh, man.
330
00:24:26,385 --> 00:24:29,471
You heard what happened to Barkley
and Ewing. There's germs in there.
331
00:24:29,638 --> 00:24:32,641
Cedric, that was in New York,
3000 miles away.
332
00:24:32,808 --> 00:24:35,310
Bacteria can travel faster
than the speed of light.
333
00:24:35,477 --> 00:24:38,480
- It could be Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
Yeah, could be.
334
00:24:38,647 --> 00:24:40,941
All right. Dress in the hallway.
335
00:24:41,191 --> 00:24:43,360
Okay.
336
00:24:45,946 --> 00:24:50,826
Okay, okay, now, which one of you maroons
has ever played basketball before?
337
00:24:50,993 --> 00:24:55,247
I have, coach. And there's an important
strategic question I need to ask you.
338
00:24:55,414 --> 00:24:56,582
Yes, yes?
339
00:25:00,169 --> 00:25:03,464
What do you think? I'm kind of partial
to purple and gold, myself.
340
00:25:03,589 --> 00:25:06,008
It goes better with my coloring.
A one, two, three, four.
341
00:25:06,175 --> 00:25:08,510
Guys? Nice outfit, Daffy.
342
00:25:08,677 --> 00:25:13,223
The little aliens say it's their turn
to, uh, use the court.
343
00:25:13,348 --> 00:25:16,477
Sure, let the little pipsqueaks
knock themselves out.
344
00:25:16,643 --> 00:25:19,438
Too bad you can't practice
getting taller, boys.
345
00:25:26,904 --> 00:25:28,864
Whoa!
Ah!
346
00:25:58,143 --> 00:25:59,311
Hey, little pig.
347
00:26:00,395 --> 00:26:02,272
- Boo.
- Aah!
348
00:26:03,607 --> 00:26:05,442
I wet myself.
349
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:11,240
Time to play a little basketball.
350
00:26:15,452 --> 00:26:18,205
Those little pipsqueaks
just turned into superstars.
351
00:26:18,372 --> 00:26:20,874
They're monsters.
352
00:26:21,041 --> 00:26:22,835
Suffering succotash.
353
00:26:23,001 --> 00:26:25,003
They're Monstars.
354
00:26:26,964 --> 00:26:29,049
Bye-bye.
355
00:26:31,426 --> 00:26:34,346
Eh,
I think we might need a little bit of help.
356
00:26:35,806 --> 00:26:37,683
A hundred and seventy-five yards.
357
00:26:37,850 --> 00:26:41,854
Okay, little fella.
You my friend or are you my enemy?
358
00:26:42,020 --> 00:26:44,481
You are my friend, right?
You are my ally.
359
00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:48,068
You are my associate,
my personal assistant.
360
00:26:48,235 --> 00:26:51,405
You are my weapon. You are leaving.
361
00:26:52,823 --> 00:26:55,659
- Great shot.
- Nice shot, Mr. Murray.
362
00:27:00,497 --> 00:27:02,207
You can stop posing now.
363
00:27:04,835 --> 00:27:06,628
- Good try.
- Not bad, not bad.
364
00:27:06,795 --> 00:27:08,797
BILL: Something for you to shoot at.
- Hit it good.
365
00:27:08,964 --> 00:27:10,757
Do my best.
366
00:27:12,092 --> 00:27:13,677
It was a good shot.
367
00:27:13,844 --> 00:27:15,637
Yeah, I know.
368
00:27:15,804 --> 00:27:17,222
Mike, I gotta ask you something.
369
00:27:17,389 --> 00:27:18,932
The NBA has to face reality.
370
00:27:19,099 --> 00:27:21,143
What's happening to these players
is serious.
371
00:27:21,268 --> 00:27:23,854
They're gonna need new players
with talent.
372
00:27:24,021 --> 00:27:27,941
Guys who are skilled, but never really
thought about a professional career before.
373
00:27:29,443 --> 00:27:30,986
You think I got a shot?
374
00:27:32,905 --> 00:27:34,239
- Come on, really?
- No.
375
00:27:34,406 --> 00:27:37,785
- Don't kid me.
- Listen. It's a man's game.
376
00:27:38,118 --> 00:27:40,120
- You can't play.
- What if I tried really hard?
377
00:27:40,287 --> 00:27:42,247
Keep it down. I'm trying to hit this ball.
378
00:27:42,539 --> 00:27:44,208
It's because I'm white, isn't it?
379
00:27:44,374 --> 00:27:46,460
No. Larry's white. So what?
380
00:27:46,627 --> 00:27:50,005
Larry's not white. Larry's clear.
381
00:27:51,340 --> 00:27:52,883
- Good shot, Larry.
That's nice.
382
00:27:53,050 --> 00:27:54,843
Get inside his ball.
383
00:27:55,135 --> 00:27:56,178
Whoa.
384
00:27:56,345 --> 00:27:57,888
You clowns can't beat that.
385
00:27:58,055 --> 00:28:00,057
- My best shot ever.
- You haven't played long.
386
00:28:00,224 --> 00:28:01,225
A Hall-of-Fame shot.
387
00:28:01,350 --> 00:28:03,519
- Really nice shot, Mr. Bird.
LARRY: Larry, please.
388
00:28:03,685 --> 00:28:05,854
- Nice shot, Mr. Larry.
- Nice shot, Larry.
389
00:28:06,021 --> 00:28:07,689
You can do this.
390
00:28:07,856 --> 00:28:10,025
Don't be nervous. You can do this.
391
00:28:10,150 --> 00:28:12,861
Larry, you feel that the NBA
has to face reality, don't you?
392
00:28:13,028 --> 00:28:16,198
Gotta look for more dominant players
in places they never looked before.
393
00:28:16,365 --> 00:28:18,992
Just look at the ball.
Visualize where you want it to go.
394
00:28:19,159 --> 00:28:22,162
- Right, right, right.
- Be the ball. Be the ball.
395
00:28:22,329 --> 00:28:23,539
Get off the tee.
396
00:28:23,705 --> 00:28:25,415
You can't jump.
397
00:28:26,834 --> 00:28:28,210
I... Yeah, go on.
398
00:28:28,877 --> 00:28:31,255
- Close to the pin?
Close to the pin? For dinner?
399
00:28:31,421 --> 00:28:33,632
Sounds good.
I'll go close to the pin.
400
00:28:33,757 --> 00:28:35,759
- Okay, cool.
- I'll take some of that.
401
00:28:38,137 --> 00:28:39,263
That's not bad.
402
00:28:39,888 --> 00:28:41,056
Good shot.
403
00:28:41,223 --> 00:28:42,891
Get down.
404
00:28:43,767 --> 00:28:45,853
Look at that. Look at that spin.
405
00:28:56,446 --> 00:28:57,698
Come on.
406
00:28:59,992 --> 00:29:01,160
It is alive.
407
00:29:04,079 --> 00:29:08,792
Yes! Yes! My first hole in one. Yes!
408
00:29:09,251 --> 00:29:10,252
Oh.
409
00:29:10,419 --> 00:29:12,796
Don't say it.
Never seen one of these before.
410
00:29:12,963 --> 00:29:16,800
Larry, nothing but the bottom of the cup.
411
00:29:16,967 --> 00:29:19,553
That's his ball too.
- Yeah, yeah, it's my ball. Sorry.
412
00:29:19,678 --> 00:29:21,472
- Let me get a picture.
- You guys are jealous.
413
00:29:21,597 --> 00:29:25,893
All right, here we go. Now, you gotta smile.
Reach in for the ball and then smile, okay?
414
00:29:26,059 --> 00:29:27,686
- Yes.
- And you think, "This is good."
415
00:29:27,853 --> 00:29:29,271
Just take the picture.
- Okay.
416
00:29:38,989 --> 00:29:40,574
- What kind of camera is that?
- Just...
417
00:29:40,741 --> 00:29:42,576
Don't point it at me. Close the lens cap.
418
00:29:42,743 --> 00:29:44,620
- I didn't do anything.
- Where did he go?
419
00:29:49,166 --> 00:29:50,626
Hey!
420
00:29:51,168 --> 00:29:53,796
No, no, no!
421
00:30:05,224 --> 00:30:08,560
Oh, uh, look out for that first step,
doc, it's a real lulu.
422
00:30:09,186 --> 00:30:10,187
Bugs Bunny?
423
00:30:10,354 --> 00:30:12,356
Eh, you were expecting
maybe the Easter Bunny?
424
00:30:13,023 --> 00:30:15,317
- You're a cartoon. You're not real.
- Not real, eh?
425
00:30:15,484 --> 00:30:17,694
If I weren't real, could I do this?
426
00:30:20,614 --> 00:30:21,990
Ugh.
427
00:30:22,116 --> 00:30:23,700
Oh, look. Is that Michael?
428
00:30:23,867 --> 00:30:25,452
It's Michael.
429
00:30:25,619 --> 00:30:26,995
It's Air Jordan.
430
00:30:27,955 --> 00:30:29,665
Basketball.
431
00:30:29,832 --> 00:30:31,792
Ooh. I tought I taw...
432
00:30:32,167 --> 00:30:35,337
I did. I did see Michael Jordan.
433
00:30:35,504 --> 00:30:39,424
Pardon me, Mr. Jordan.
Uh, can I have your auto...?
434
00:30:39,591 --> 00:30:40,884
Your John Hancock, please?
435
00:30:41,051 --> 00:30:43,095
Back off. Let the doctor take a look.
436
00:30:45,931 --> 00:30:47,850
- A little high.
- No.
437
00:30:48,016 --> 00:30:49,143
Going down.
438
00:30:49,309 --> 00:30:50,978
No!
439
00:30:55,983 --> 00:30:58,986
So, what do you say we go
for a little spin?
440
00:31:01,697 --> 00:31:04,783
Hmm.
Now, let's see what we got inside here.
441
00:31:07,077 --> 00:31:08,662
Say "ah."
442
00:31:10,497 --> 00:31:12,958
All right. He's okay.
443
00:31:14,376 --> 00:31:17,880
- What's going on here?
- Why, Michael, I thought you'd never ask.
444
00:31:18,380 --> 00:31:22,217
These aliens from outer space want
to make us slaves in their theme park.
445
00:31:22,384 --> 00:31:23,760
What do we care? They're little.
446
00:31:23,927 --> 00:31:26,054
So we challenged them
to a basketball game.
447
00:31:26,221 --> 00:31:29,016
But then they show up
and they ain't so little. They're huge.
448
00:31:29,183 --> 00:31:32,352
We need to beat these guys,
because they're talking about slavery.
449
00:31:32,519 --> 00:31:36,231
They'll make us do stand-up comedy,
the same jokes every night for all eternity.
450
00:31:36,398 --> 00:31:39,610
We'll be locked up like wild animals
and then trotted out to perform...
451
00:31:39,776 --> 00:31:43,739
...for a bunch of lowbrow, bug-eyed,
fat-headed, humor-challenged aliens.
452
00:31:43,906 --> 00:31:46,408
Uh, what I'm trying to say is...
453
00:31:46,575 --> 00:31:48,786
...we need your help!
454
00:31:49,495 --> 00:31:51,121
Yeah, but I'm a baseball player now.
455
00:31:51,288 --> 00:31:55,375
Right. And I'm a Shakespearean actor.
456
00:31:58,462 --> 00:32:03,050
Mike? Michael? It's Stan. Stan Podolak.
457
00:32:03,217 --> 00:32:05,761
Uh, look,
I need you to come out now, okay?
458
00:32:05,928 --> 00:32:07,971
Because you got a baseball game
tomorrow.
459
00:32:08,138 --> 00:32:11,767
And I'd look pretty stupid
if you don't show up.
460
00:32:11,934 --> 00:32:14,520
Think Michael's all right?
I hate to leave him like this.
461
00:32:14,645 --> 00:32:18,607
I'm sure he's fine. I think he just had to
get away from that Stan character.
462
00:32:18,774 --> 00:32:20,818
- God, he's pathetic, isn't he?
- Yeah.
463
00:32:20,984 --> 00:32:22,736
I'm gonna give us both twos back there.
464
00:32:22,903 --> 00:32:25,072
We weren't in any kind of
emotional state to putt.
465
00:32:25,239 --> 00:32:26,907
- I think that's fair.
- Yeah.
466
00:32:27,074 --> 00:32:31,286
Now, if Mike is gone,
the NBA is gonna need some new people.
467
00:32:31,453 --> 00:32:32,704
There's room at the top.
468
00:32:32,871 --> 00:32:35,541
An exciting guy who could maybe
even perform at half-time.
469
00:32:35,707 --> 00:32:38,377
You still tight with David Stern?
A phone call from you...
470
00:32:38,669 --> 00:32:42,297
Look, I want to help, but I haven't
played basketball in a long time.
471
00:32:42,464 --> 00:32:44,758
- My timing's all off.
- Eh, we'll fix your timing.
472
00:32:45,217 --> 00:32:46,802
Look at our facilities.
473
00:32:46,969 --> 00:32:49,221
We've got hoops.
474
00:32:49,388 --> 00:32:50,973
We got weights.
475
00:32:51,473 --> 00:32:54,101
We've got balls. Whoa!
476
00:32:54,268 --> 00:32:56,353
You sure do. This place is a mess.
477
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:58,897
Mess?
You're worried about a little mess?
478
00:32:59,064 --> 00:33:02,192
There's nothing here
a little spit shine wouldn't fix.
479
00:33:02,359 --> 00:33:04,486
- Spit shine!
- Spit shine!
480
00:33:22,588 --> 00:33:24,131
Lemony-fresh.
481
00:33:24,298 --> 00:33:25,924
You guys are nuts.
482
00:33:26,091 --> 00:33:29,011
Correction: We're Looney Tunes.
483
00:33:29,178 --> 00:33:34,683
And as such are the exclusive property
and trademark of Warner Bros. Inc.
484
00:33:42,649 --> 00:33:44,443
I'm here.
485
00:33:45,194 --> 00:33:47,112
Me too.
486
00:33:47,821 --> 00:33:49,323
That hurt.
487
00:33:51,658 --> 00:33:52,659
Who are these guys?
488
00:33:52,826 --> 00:33:57,247
Well, uh, remember the tiny aliens
I told you about?
489
00:33:57,414 --> 00:33:58,582
Oh.
490
00:33:58,749 --> 00:34:02,419
You heard of the Dream Team?
Well, we're the Mean Team, wussy-man.
491
00:34:02,586 --> 00:34:04,421
- Wussy-man.
- Wussy-man?
492
00:34:04,588 --> 00:34:07,758
We're the Monstars. M-O-N... Um...
493
00:34:07,925 --> 00:34:10,344
Let's see what you got, chump.
494
00:34:11,428 --> 00:34:12,971
I don't play basketball anymore.
495
00:34:13,138 --> 00:34:15,516
"I don't play basketball anymore."
496
00:34:16,809 --> 00:34:18,685
Maybe you're chicken.
497
00:34:20,229 --> 00:34:22,773
I say, I resemble that remark.
498
00:34:22,940 --> 00:34:23,941
You calling me chicken?
499
00:34:24,107 --> 00:34:25,651
Hey. Come here.
500
00:34:29,696 --> 00:34:31,490
Here you go. Take him.
501
00:34:32,032 --> 00:34:34,952
Watch the footwork. Can you believe it?
502
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:38,997
Get out of the way.
503
00:34:42,251 --> 00:34:45,963
Hey, everybody. Look at your hero now.
504
00:34:50,008 --> 00:34:51,718
You guys are making a big mistake.
505
00:34:51,885 --> 00:34:55,013
You're all washed up, baldy.
506
00:34:55,180 --> 00:34:56,265
Baldy?
507
00:34:56,431 --> 00:34:57,766
He is not washed up.
508
00:34:57,891 --> 00:34:59,643
- Michael's the greatest ever.
- Shut up.
509
00:34:59,893 --> 00:35:01,478
Ooh.
510
00:35:04,189 --> 00:35:06,233
My poor little cranium.
511
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:09,653
- You okay?
- Yeah, are you okay?
512
00:35:09,820 --> 00:35:10,821
Whoops.
513
00:35:10,988 --> 00:35:14,533
You're not scared of them,
are you, Michael?
514
00:35:23,542 --> 00:35:25,711
- Let's play some basketball.
TUNES: Yeah.
515
00:35:29,006 --> 00:35:31,925
Yeah, serve her! Come on! Rebound!
516
00:35:46,732 --> 00:35:49,568
You're...
You're Charles Barkley.
517
00:35:51,195 --> 00:35:54,031
Girls. Come on over. Hurry up. Hurry.
518
00:35:54,198 --> 00:35:56,325
Look. It's Charles Barkley.
519
00:35:56,450 --> 00:35:57,451
Hey, can I play?
520
00:36:22,935 --> 00:36:24,686
You're not Charles Barkley.
521
00:36:24,812 --> 00:36:26,772
Just a wannabe who looks like him.
522
00:36:27,731 --> 00:36:30,108
Sorry. Break out.
523
00:36:30,275 --> 00:36:32,653
You shouldn't even be here. Be gone.
524
00:36:33,403 --> 00:36:35,280
Wannabe. Be gone.
525
00:36:35,531 --> 00:36:37,199
Just a few more tests, gentlemen.
526
00:36:37,366 --> 00:36:41,703
Electrolyte levels, glucose,
CBCs, RBCs, etcetera.
527
00:36:41,870 --> 00:36:43,997
And we've scheduled a 12-lead
stress test...
528
00:36:44,164 --> 00:36:47,709
...and neurological battery
to include EEG, reflex tests...
529
00:36:48,210 --> 00:36:53,132
And this girl, 5-feet-nothing,
blocked my shot.
530
00:36:53,298 --> 00:36:55,717
When did you first start having
this dream?
531
00:36:55,884 --> 00:36:58,428
It wasn't a dream. It really happened.
532
00:37:00,973 --> 00:37:05,227
And it climbed up my back
and into my brain.
533
00:37:05,394 --> 00:37:09,148
Are there any other areas
besides basketball...
534
00:37:09,314 --> 00:37:14,153
...where you find yourself
unable to perform?
535
00:37:16,572 --> 00:37:18,699
- No.
- Just asking.
536
00:37:21,577 --> 00:37:25,581
I've been MRI'd, EKG'd,
x-rayed, laser beamed...
537
00:37:25,747 --> 00:37:27,833
I promise I'll never swear again.
538
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,877
I'll never get another technical.
539
00:37:30,043 --> 00:37:31,170
I'll never trash-talk.
540
00:37:31,295 --> 00:37:32,463
I've got other skills.
541
00:37:32,629 --> 00:37:35,090
- I could go back and work on the farm.
- Really?
542
00:37:35,215 --> 00:37:38,552
Or maybe I could go back to the jungle
and be a missionary again.
543
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:41,597
What are you saying?
That I'm trying to disobey my mama?
544
00:37:41,763 --> 00:37:43,474
I didn't say that. You did, Muggsy.
545
00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:44,725
But I love my mama.
546
00:37:44,892 --> 00:37:46,852
Still can't find anything wrong with us.
547
00:37:46,977 --> 00:37:48,604
Hey, maybe nothing's wrong with us.
548
00:37:48,770 --> 00:37:50,898
That's right, Muggs.
Maybe it's just in our head.
549
00:37:51,064 --> 00:37:53,525
We're fine.
It's just some psychosomatic deal.
550
00:37:53,692 --> 00:37:56,236
Or something to do with the moon,
or the alignment of the planet.
551
00:37:57,654 --> 00:37:59,323
I'll never go out with Madonna again.
552
00:38:03,702 --> 00:38:05,162
What are you doing?
553
00:38:05,329 --> 00:38:08,415
- I'm, uh... I'm fixing a divot.
- Oh.
554
00:38:10,250 --> 00:38:12,544
He's fixing a divot!
555
00:38:41,156 --> 00:38:43,408
Has anyone here ever played basketball?
556
00:38:43,575 --> 00:38:45,577
Um, I have.
557
00:38:46,370 --> 00:38:47,913
I'd like to try out for the team.
558
00:38:48,914 --> 00:38:51,750
- Hey.
- Hi. My name is Lola Bunny.
559
00:38:51,917 --> 00:38:54,586
- Lola?
- Ha, ha. Yes.
560
00:38:54,753 --> 00:38:58,340
Hello. Eh, my name is Bugs.
561
00:38:58,507 --> 00:39:00,926
Ahem. You want to play a little
one-on-one, doll?
562
00:39:01,426 --> 00:39:02,970
- "Doll"?
- Uh-huh.
563
00:39:03,137 --> 00:39:07,391
- On the court, Bugs.
- Sure.
564
00:39:07,558 --> 00:39:08,600
Ooh. She's hot.
565
00:39:09,935 --> 00:39:11,687
There she goes.
566
00:39:11,854 --> 00:39:14,606
- Ready?
- Yes.
567
00:39:15,649 --> 00:39:17,442
I got it. I got it.
568
00:39:20,112 --> 00:39:21,530
That girl's got some skills.
569
00:39:23,323 --> 00:39:24,658
Yes?
570
00:39:27,411 --> 00:39:30,789
Don't ever call me "doll."
571
00:39:31,623 --> 00:39:33,208
Check.
572
00:39:35,169 --> 00:39:37,463
Hey, nice playing with you.
573
00:39:37,629 --> 00:39:38,630
Very smooth.
574
00:39:38,797 --> 00:39:41,675
Ah, she's obviously nuts about me.
575
00:39:41,842 --> 00:39:42,843
Obviously.
576
00:39:44,178 --> 00:39:45,721
Okay. Where's the ball?
577
00:39:47,264 --> 00:39:48,515
Let's do some drills.
578
00:39:54,021 --> 00:39:55,981
Can anyone lend me a pair of sneakers?
579
00:39:56,148 --> 00:39:58,358
Uh, sneakers?
580
00:40:02,029 --> 00:40:03,822
- Sorry.
- Someone has to go to my house...
581
00:40:03,989 --> 00:40:06,784
...and pick up my basketball gear.
- To your house?
582
00:40:06,950 --> 00:40:08,660
- In 3-D land?
Yeah.
583
00:40:08,827 --> 00:40:10,829
Whatever you do...
584
00:40:10,996 --> 00:40:12,915
...don't forget my North Carolina shorts.
585
00:40:13,081 --> 00:40:15,626
Your shorts? From college?
586
00:40:15,793 --> 00:40:18,504
I wore them under my Chicago Bulls
uniform every game.
587
00:40:19,838 --> 00:40:21,882
Hey. I washed them after every game.
588
00:40:22,049 --> 00:40:23,175
- Yeah.
- Sure.
589
00:40:23,342 --> 00:40:24,635
- I did.
- Gross.
590
00:40:26,220 --> 00:40:28,764
The view back here stinks.
591
00:40:28,931 --> 00:40:30,390
Whoa.
What?
592
00:40:30,557 --> 00:40:32,476
We're right in front of Michael's house.
593
00:40:32,643 --> 00:40:34,061
I knew that.
594
00:40:34,186 --> 00:40:36,814
Shh. Okay, let's go in this way.
595
00:40:36,980 --> 00:40:39,358
I say, let's go in that way.
596
00:40:40,442 --> 00:40:43,237
He just never learns.
597
00:40:44,780 --> 00:40:46,365
Now, let me see.
598
00:40:46,532 --> 00:40:50,744
I must be very, very close.
599
00:40:52,830 --> 00:40:53,956
Mother.
600
00:40:59,586 --> 00:41:01,463
Nice digs.
601
00:41:03,841 --> 00:41:07,594
Well, well. I wonder who that could be.
602
00:41:09,221 --> 00:41:12,182
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
603
00:41:12,307 --> 00:41:15,185
Shh. Everyone's sleeping.
604
00:41:15,352 --> 00:41:17,271
- I knew that.
- Come on, come on.
605
00:41:17,437 --> 00:41:19,523
We gotta find Michael's basketball stuff.
606
00:41:21,108 --> 00:41:23,485
Nope. Nothing in here.
607
00:41:24,153 --> 00:41:27,489
Nope. Ah, but a very nice dinette set.
608
00:41:27,656 --> 00:41:30,075
Uh-uh. Not here.
609
00:41:30,242 --> 00:41:31,618
Let's look upstairs.
610
00:41:31,743 --> 00:41:33,787
Yes, oh, fearless leader.
611
00:41:34,621 --> 00:41:37,916
So he needs his special underwear.
612
00:41:38,083 --> 00:41:39,626
Oh. Shh.
613
00:41:39,793 --> 00:41:42,546
Sorry.
You think she's got enough toys?
614
00:41:42,713 --> 00:41:46,592
Speaking of toys, you know all
those mugs and t-shirts and lunch boxes...
615
00:41:46,758 --> 00:41:48,719
...with our pictures on them?
- Yeah.
616
00:41:48,886 --> 00:41:50,929
You, uh, ever see any money
from all that stuff?
617
00:41:51,096 --> 00:41:53,640
Ha. Not a cent.
Hmm. Me neither.
618
00:41:53,807 --> 00:41:54,933
It's a crying shame.
619
00:41:55,100 --> 00:41:58,103
We gotta get new agents.
We're getting screwed.
620
00:41:58,228 --> 00:41:59,730
We have found the trophy room.
621
00:41:59,897 --> 00:42:01,732
Now spread out and search the place.
622
00:42:01,899 --> 00:42:04,943
Yes, sahib. Oh, brother.
623
00:42:05,068 --> 00:42:08,155
Here I am, in the peak of my form
playing second banana...
624
00:42:08,322 --> 00:42:10,866
...to some sort of a harebrain.
- Yap, yap, yap. Hmm.
625
00:42:10,991 --> 00:42:13,494
This could be useful. Aha.
626
00:42:13,869 --> 00:42:15,370
If this were a union job, I...
627
00:42:16,121 --> 00:42:17,331
That's very nice.
628
00:42:18,415 --> 00:42:20,250
Oh, one of his shoes.
629
00:42:25,255 --> 00:42:26,673
Where is that other shoe?
630
00:42:28,467 --> 00:42:30,302
Where are you?
631
00:42:31,094 --> 00:42:32,429
Eureka!
632
00:42:33,388 --> 00:42:34,932
Come to Papa.
633
00:42:37,810 --> 00:42:41,021
- Oops.
- What a fuzz-foot. You are so clumsy.
634
00:42:42,356 --> 00:42:44,650
- Catch, feather head.
- Thanks.
635
00:42:48,278 --> 00:42:52,366
- Well, time to go.
- Did we get everything?
636
00:42:52,533 --> 00:42:54,743
- The shorts.
- The shorts.
637
00:42:54,868 --> 00:42:56,787
In there?
638
00:42:56,912 --> 00:42:58,747
Okay, I'll check.
639
00:43:02,835 --> 00:43:04,795
I found the shorts.
640
00:43:08,882 --> 00:43:11,135
The pain.
641
00:43:11,468 --> 00:43:14,555
- I'm right behind you, pal.
- Uh, that's none too reassuring.
642
00:43:14,721 --> 00:43:17,057
Nice puppy. How's about a bone?
643
00:43:18,016 --> 00:43:21,145
- No dice.
- What about a nice holiday ham?
644
00:43:21,270 --> 00:43:24,148
- He ain't buying it. Can't we talk this over?
- Down, Beethoven.
645
00:43:24,273 --> 00:43:26,650
Ooh. The kids are here.
646
00:43:29,069 --> 00:43:31,238
Give it to me, Charles.
647
00:43:34,199 --> 00:43:36,493
- Here you go, Bugs.
- Thanks, kid.
648
00:43:36,785 --> 00:43:37,786
Shoo. Shoo.
649
00:43:39,079 --> 00:43:44,626
Bad dog. That is the last time
I'm ever working with dogs or children.
650
00:43:44,751 --> 00:43:46,962
- Bye-bye.
- Hey, where you going?
651
00:43:47,129 --> 00:43:50,549
Well, uh, you see, the Looney Tunes have
a big basketball game coming up...
652
00:43:50,674 --> 00:43:54,011
...and, uh, your dad's gonna play.
- All right.
653
00:43:54,178 --> 00:43:56,346
Yeah. But don't tell anybody.
654
00:44:12,446 --> 00:44:14,364
I see aliens.
655
00:44:14,531 --> 00:44:17,785
Little aliens from outer space.
656
00:44:17,951 --> 00:44:20,871
They forced their way inside your bodies.
657
00:44:20,996 --> 00:44:26,210
They need your talent
to win a basketball game against...
658
00:44:26,376 --> 00:44:28,170
...Bugs Bunny.
Bugs Bunny?
659
00:44:28,337 --> 00:44:34,343
I also see Michael Jordan
being sucked down a golf hole...
660
00:44:34,510 --> 00:44:35,928
...by furry creatures.
661
00:44:36,094 --> 00:44:39,181
- That's it. We're out of here.
- We're leaving now.
662
00:44:39,348 --> 00:44:42,267
- Let's try some acupuncture.
- Good idea. Bye.
663
00:44:42,518 --> 00:44:45,103
This is it. This is it.
664
00:44:45,270 --> 00:44:47,940
I don't know where you are, Michael,
but wherever you are...
665
00:44:48,106 --> 00:44:51,485
...you obviously enjoy being there
more than spending time with me.
666
00:44:51,652 --> 00:44:55,030
You better hope this Jordan character
still know how to play hoops.
667
00:44:55,155 --> 00:44:56,949
You and me both, brother.
668
00:44:57,074 --> 00:44:59,993
Listen, how is this for a new team name:
669
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:02,496
- The Ducks.
Please.
670
00:45:02,663 --> 00:45:06,208
What kind of Mickey Mouse organization
would name their team the Ducks?
671
00:45:06,375 --> 00:45:09,086
So sue me. It's just a suggestion.
672
00:45:13,674 --> 00:45:15,008
You're doing it.
673
00:45:15,175 --> 00:45:16,301
You're becoming mighty.
674
00:45:16,468 --> 00:45:19,054
- Go!
Come on, guys. No pain, no gain.
675
00:45:19,221 --> 00:45:21,306
I don't hear it. What is it?
676
00:45:21,849 --> 00:45:23,934
Come on.
- Come on.
677
00:45:24,893 --> 00:45:27,312
- Eh, guys?
ALL: Yes?
678
00:45:27,437 --> 00:45:30,774
Look who's finally ready to play.
679
00:45:37,156 --> 00:45:38,949
Let's see if I remember how to do this.
680
00:45:45,706 --> 00:45:46,915
Nice.
681
00:46:08,937 --> 00:46:10,022
Michael!
682
00:46:12,232 --> 00:46:15,277
Is it really you? Oh!
683
00:46:15,444 --> 00:46:20,491
Thank God you're all right.
Oh! I was so worried.
684
00:46:20,657 --> 00:46:23,160
Come on, Stan. Don't hug me, please.
685
00:46:23,327 --> 00:46:24,745
- Sorry.
- What are you doing here?
686
00:46:24,912 --> 00:46:27,039
I gotta take you back.
You got baseball practice.
687
00:46:27,206 --> 00:46:30,667
I can't. I'm helping my friends
in their basketball game.
688
00:46:34,505 --> 00:46:37,174
Michael, you know that your friends
are cartoon characters?
689
00:46:38,675 --> 00:46:40,552
Yeah. So?
690
00:46:40,677 --> 00:46:45,015
Doesn't bother you, it doesn't bother me.
Let me help. Let me help. I can help.
691
00:46:45,182 --> 00:46:47,100
- What can you do?
- Well, you know, I mean...
692
00:46:47,267 --> 00:46:50,312
...I may not be very tall, but I'm slow.
693
00:46:50,437 --> 00:46:53,065
- And large.
- And a dork.
694
00:46:53,232 --> 00:46:55,234
I'll do anything, Michael. Anything.
695
00:46:55,359 --> 00:46:57,903
- Anything?
- Anything.
696
00:46:59,029 --> 00:47:01,657
Come here. Come here for a second.
697
00:47:02,199 --> 00:47:03,951
- Sit right here.
- Okay.
698
00:47:04,118 --> 00:47:05,828
- Okay?
- Okay. No problem.
699
00:47:05,994 --> 00:47:07,830
All right. All right, let's go, team.
700
00:47:09,581 --> 00:47:12,042
If somebody gets injured,
we could see a lot of minutes.
701
00:47:12,209 --> 00:47:14,878
I'm a cheerleader.
702
00:47:32,312 --> 00:47:35,065
Mr. Commissioner,
we've got the place sealed off.
703
00:47:35,399 --> 00:47:39,987
Quiet!
Ladies and gentlemen, please, quiet!
704
00:47:40,154 --> 00:47:43,574
Listen. After meeting with team owners,
I have decided...
705
00:47:43,740 --> 00:47:47,828
...that until we can guarantee the health
and safety of our NBA players...
706
00:47:47,995 --> 00:47:51,039
...there will be no more basketball
this season.
707
00:48:12,186 --> 00:48:13,187
Yes.
708
00:48:28,660 --> 00:48:31,121
Just get out of my way.
709
00:48:37,503 --> 00:48:39,004
- Ready?
Yes!
710
00:48:39,546 --> 00:48:40,798
Let's go.
711
00:48:46,470 --> 00:48:47,846
Are these the best seats?
712
00:48:48,013 --> 00:48:49,848
Like them. Yes.
713
00:48:50,015 --> 00:48:53,435
Can see everything from here.
Very good.
714
00:49:00,234 --> 00:49:03,612
- Ready to go?
- Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Riot.
715
00:49:05,531 --> 00:49:08,617
Ladies and gentlemen...
716
00:49:08,784 --> 00:49:13,080
...the starting lineup for the Tune Squad.
717
00:49:15,082 --> 00:49:20,170
Standing 2-foot-4,
The Wonder From Down Under...
718
00:49:20,337 --> 00:49:23,632
...the Tazmanian Devil.
719
00:49:27,094 --> 00:49:32,724
At small forward,
standing a scintillating 3-foot-2...
720
00:49:32,891 --> 00:49:37,980
...The Heartthrob of the Hoops,
Lola Bunny.
721
00:49:40,732 --> 00:49:46,405
At power forward,
The Quackster of the Courts, Daffy Duck.
722
00:49:46,530 --> 00:49:48,365
Thank you. Thank you.
723
00:49:51,201 --> 00:49:54,705
Very funny. Let's all laugh at the duck.
724
00:49:54,872 --> 00:50:00,752
And at point guard, standing 3-foot-3,
4 feet if you include the ears...
725
00:50:00,919 --> 00:50:04,673
...co-captain of the Tune Squad...
726
00:50:04,840 --> 00:50:07,843
...The Doctor of Delight, Bugs Bunny.
727
00:50:07,968 --> 00:50:09,595
Thank you. Thank you.
728
00:50:12,014 --> 00:50:16,393
And now,
the player-coach of the Tune Squad...
729
00:50:16,977 --> 00:50:20,022
...at 6-foot-6, from North Carolina...
730
00:50:20,189 --> 00:50:26,487
...His Royal Airness, Michael Jordan.
731
00:50:29,573 --> 00:50:31,909
Who? Is he a Looney Tune?
732
00:50:32,075 --> 00:50:34,077
Uh... Uh, well, perhaps.
733
00:50:37,414 --> 00:50:39,875
- You guys ready?
- I'm set to take it to the rack, Jack.
734
00:50:40,042 --> 00:50:42,294
Those Monstars
will wish they'd never been born.
735
00:50:42,461 --> 00:50:45,172
- Guys, let's just go out and have fun.
Yeah!
736
00:50:45,339 --> 00:50:48,634
The challengers for the Ultimate Game...
737
00:50:48,801 --> 00:50:52,221
...all the way from Moron Mountain:
738
00:50:52,387 --> 00:50:57,935
The Monstars.
739
00:51:00,687 --> 00:51:03,482
Go Monstars! Go Monstars!
Go Monstars!
740
00:51:11,365 --> 00:51:13,408
What are you looking at?
741
00:51:20,791 --> 00:51:22,417
Cool shoes.
742
00:51:24,294 --> 00:51:25,838
Uh...
743
00:51:26,463 --> 00:51:27,840
Ready?
744
00:51:33,011 --> 00:51:35,347
I got it, I got it, I got it.
I got the ball. I got the ball.
745
00:51:35,514 --> 00:51:36,932
Yipe!
746
00:51:37,432 --> 00:51:38,433
Ooh.
747
00:51:43,772 --> 00:51:46,608
Way to go, boys.
Did you see the moves on that one?
748
00:51:47,359 --> 00:51:50,696
Come on, show me something.
Come on, show me something.
749
00:51:53,740 --> 00:51:55,451
- Whoops.
- The duck.
750
00:51:55,576 --> 00:51:57,703
Yeah, beat up on the duck.
751
00:52:02,708 --> 00:52:04,084
Oh, my.
752
00:52:04,251 --> 00:52:06,211
She was wide open.
753
00:52:16,680 --> 00:52:18,891
Watch it, coming your way.
Watch out, watch out.
754
00:52:20,142 --> 00:52:21,143
Get him.
755
00:52:25,898 --> 00:52:27,775
How did he do that?
756
00:52:29,026 --> 00:52:31,820
- Nice shot, Mr. J.
- Hey, hey, come on. Get back on defense.
757
00:52:33,572 --> 00:52:35,032
Way to go!
758
00:52:35,199 --> 00:52:36,408
Air J! Air J!
759
00:52:38,744 --> 00:52:39,745
Red light.
760
00:52:39,912 --> 00:52:43,665
- Feed me. Feed me.
- Feed you? Feed me.
761
00:52:47,044 --> 00:52:49,379
- Bad old putty tat.
I'll take that, thank you.
762
00:52:50,464 --> 00:52:52,966
Don't try this at home.
763
00:52:54,009 --> 00:52:56,053
I wish I was in the land of cott...
764
00:52:56,220 --> 00:52:57,846
You going somewhere?
765
00:52:58,013 --> 00:53:02,392
May I remind you, sir, that physical
violence is patently against the rules.
766
00:53:02,559 --> 00:53:07,856
Yeow! Did you order Original Recipe
or Extra Crispy?
767
00:53:11,443 --> 00:53:13,153
- Let's go.
- Me?
768
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:16,573
- Oh, boy. I'm ready. I can do this.
- The mouse? You picked the mouse?
769
00:53:16,698 --> 00:53:18,909
- I love basketball. I always have. Do you?
- Uh-huh.
770
00:53:19,076 --> 00:53:21,120
- You're big. I bet you're good.
- Right.
771
00:53:21,286 --> 00:53:22,830
I'm small, but I'll try hard to be good.
772
00:53:22,996 --> 00:53:25,374
- Okay. Yeah.
- Really, I will. I always try hard.
773
00:53:25,541 --> 00:53:27,793
My mom says,
"Try your best at everything you do..."
774
00:53:27,960 --> 00:53:29,503
Oh!
775
00:53:30,921 --> 00:53:33,006
Try to get by me, doll.
776
00:53:33,173 --> 00:53:34,758
"Doll"?
777
00:53:39,221 --> 00:53:41,932
Don't ever call me "doll."
778
00:53:42,057 --> 00:53:43,684
- Nice shot.
- Thanks, Bugs.
779
00:53:43,851 --> 00:53:44,935
Hmm?
780
00:53:45,102 --> 00:53:47,938
Where's the defense, boy?
I got you right here.
781
00:53:48,772 --> 00:53:50,816
911.
782
00:53:50,983 --> 00:53:53,986
Piece of pie? Pork chop?
Some sorbet, perhaps?
783
00:54:09,835 --> 00:54:10,836
Half-time.
784
00:54:13,213 --> 00:54:14,506
Holy putty tat.
785
00:54:16,216 --> 00:54:18,469
Yeah, man, we got it going on.
One more half.
786
00:54:18,635 --> 00:54:20,262
Right, man. We got them.
787
00:54:20,429 --> 00:54:22,514
Moron Mountain, here we come.
788
00:54:22,681 --> 00:54:24,600
We're gonna be slaves.
789
00:54:24,766 --> 00:54:27,853
Come on, guys, keep your head up.
Got a whole other half to play.
790
00:54:41,241 --> 00:54:43,327
It's the boss.
791
00:54:43,494 --> 00:54:45,996
Hello, Mr. Swackhammer.
792
00:54:46,163 --> 00:54:47,581
All right.
793
00:54:47,748 --> 00:54:51,043
Not bad for the first half,
but we gotta keep this up.
794
00:54:51,210 --> 00:54:52,336
No problem. We stole...
795
00:54:52,461 --> 00:54:54,671
We stole talent from the best players
in the NBA.
796
00:54:54,838 --> 00:54:56,882
From the NBA.
797
00:54:58,675 --> 00:55:00,010
Shut up.
798
00:55:01,303 --> 00:55:03,180
I smell something.
799
00:55:04,640 --> 00:55:06,683
Uh, we have been playing really hard.
800
00:55:06,850 --> 00:55:09,061
- Yeah.
- Not you, you idiot.
801
00:55:11,105 --> 00:55:13,440
It's coming from over here.
802
00:55:13,607 --> 00:55:14,608
That locker.
803
00:55:17,694 --> 00:55:19,238
- Look.
- Aah!
804
00:55:19,404 --> 00:55:22,366
- It's the chubby boy.
- Ah.
805
00:55:22,533 --> 00:55:26,161
It smells like a spy.
806
00:55:28,539 --> 00:55:31,834
You guys need a publicist?
I can make you big. Ha, ha.
807
00:55:32,126 --> 00:55:34,169
- I know we're down.
Yeah. Let's hear the story.
808
00:55:34,336 --> 00:55:36,421
But I've been in this situation
many times before.
809
00:55:36,588 --> 00:55:39,800
We can still win this thing.
It's not over with. We gotta come together.
810
00:55:39,967 --> 00:55:41,927
We gotta believe in ourselves.
We can win this game.
811
00:55:42,094 --> 00:55:43,595
Yeah, right. That's gonna help us.
812
00:55:47,057 --> 00:55:50,060
Looks like Stan just had
a close encounter with a bug-zapper.
813
00:55:51,186 --> 00:55:54,106
Monstars. The Monstars.
814
00:55:57,860 --> 00:56:00,404
Ooh. That's gotta hurt.
- You all right, Stan?
815
00:56:00,571 --> 00:56:02,239
The Monst...
816
00:56:02,698 --> 00:56:06,743
The Monstars stole the talent
from the NBA players.
817
00:56:10,247 --> 00:56:12,166
So that's what happened to those guys.
818
00:56:12,332 --> 00:56:15,919
I think we should qui... Forfeit.
819
00:56:16,086 --> 00:56:17,880
ALL: Yeah.
- I didn't get dragged down here...
820
00:56:18,046 --> 00:56:20,632
...just to get my butt whipped
by a bunch of ugly Monstars.
821
00:56:20,799 --> 00:56:23,552
I ain't going out like that.
We're letting them push us around.
822
00:56:25,012 --> 00:56:28,640
We gotta fight them back. We gotta take it
to them. We gotta get right in their faces.
823
00:56:30,058 --> 00:56:31,685
What do you say?
824
00:56:32,227 --> 00:56:34,188
Are you with me or not?
825
00:56:39,359 --> 00:56:42,404
Finished? Great speech and all, doc.
You had them riveted.
826
00:56:42,571 --> 00:56:45,407
- But, uh, didn't you forget something?
- What?
827
00:56:46,074 --> 00:56:47,951
Your secret stuff.
828
00:56:55,250 --> 00:56:56,335
Wow.
829
00:56:56,627 --> 00:56:58,504
Whoa, nice deltoids.
830
00:56:58,670 --> 00:57:00,339
Play along.
831
00:57:01,507 --> 00:57:04,343
Uh, stop hogging it, Mike.
We're your teammates.
832
00:57:04,468 --> 00:57:07,054
Secret stuff?
833
00:57:07,221 --> 00:57:10,808
Secret stuff?
- You wouldn't hold out on us, would you?
834
00:57:10,974 --> 00:57:12,976
No, I mean,
I didn't think you guys really needed it.
835
00:57:13,143 --> 00:57:15,979
I mean, you're so tough.
You're competitive.
836
00:57:16,105 --> 00:57:19,983
We're also chicken, son. We need it bad.
- Hey.
837
00:57:20,150 --> 00:57:22,444
- Uh, I'd like some of that.
Could I have a sip, please?
838
00:57:22,611 --> 00:57:26,156
You know, this goes against everything
they taught me in health class.
839
00:57:26,865 --> 00:57:28,033
Do you want to win or not?
840
00:57:28,200 --> 00:57:30,119
Bottoms up.
841
00:57:31,870 --> 00:57:32,871
- Yummy.
- All right.
842
00:57:33,038 --> 00:57:35,666
How about we go out
and kick some alien butt, huh? Let's go.
843
00:57:35,833 --> 00:57:39,044
- How about it? Ready?
Yeah!
844
00:58:00,274 --> 00:58:01,942
Coming through.
845
00:58:03,986 --> 00:58:05,195
Bugs.
846
00:58:06,405 --> 00:58:07,406
Special delivery.
847
00:58:12,077 --> 00:58:13,078
Boo!
848
00:58:19,042 --> 00:58:22,045
Eh, nice kaboom, Wile E.
849
00:58:36,977 --> 00:58:39,229
Let's teach them a lesson.
850
00:58:44,151 --> 00:58:45,527
Nice butt.
851
00:58:53,660 --> 00:58:55,454
Going up.
You're mine, fool.
852
00:58:57,498 --> 00:58:58,916
Slammy.
853
00:59:00,834 --> 00:59:03,337
Hello.
A little surprise for you, my friends.
854
00:59:09,301 --> 00:59:10,427
Two points.
855
00:59:19,478 --> 00:59:22,064
Ooh. This will be good.
856
00:59:33,826 --> 00:59:35,452
- Okay, birdie.
- Uh-oh.
857
00:59:51,593 --> 00:59:53,512
Yes!
- Time out!
858
00:59:57,641 --> 01:00:00,269
Shut up, you little bug.
Get away from me. Powwow.
859
01:00:00,394 --> 01:00:04,022
All right. We're right back in this game.
Come on, now. Let's play tough defense.
860
01:00:04,189 --> 01:00:05,524
Why didn't you get this guy?
861
01:00:06,108 --> 01:00:08,944
He's a baseball player.
- Yeah, boss, a baseball player.
862
01:00:09,111 --> 01:00:11,405
Looks like a basketball player to me.
863
01:00:11,572 --> 01:00:13,240
Yeah, me too.
864
01:00:13,407 --> 01:00:16,827
- He's the one I want for Moron Mountain.
- Hey.
865
01:00:18,620 --> 01:00:20,581
Are you talking to me?
866
01:00:20,747 --> 01:00:23,792
Yeah, I'm talking to you.
You want a piece of me? Come and get it.
867
01:00:25,377 --> 01:00:26,712
Uh-oh.
868
01:00:27,588 --> 01:00:29,089
What did you have in mind?
869
01:00:30,299 --> 01:00:32,384
Hat about we raise the stakes
a little bit?
870
01:00:32,551 --> 01:00:33,927
Hmm.
871
01:00:34,344 --> 01:00:35,846
Interesting.
872
01:00:36,013 --> 01:00:39,016
If we win, you give the NBA
players their talent back.
873
01:00:39,183 --> 01:00:41,059
But what if we win?
874
01:00:42,394 --> 01:00:44,062
- If you win?
- Uh-huh.
875
01:00:44,646 --> 01:00:45,606
You get me.
876
01:00:45,773 --> 01:00:46,815
Good deal, boss.
877
01:00:47,274 --> 01:00:49,193
Doc, you think that's a good ide...?
878
01:00:52,404 --> 01:00:54,573
You'll be our star attraction.
879
01:00:55,866 --> 01:00:58,327
You'll sign autographs all day long.
880
01:00:59,703 --> 01:01:02,206
And play one-on-one
with the paying customers.
881
01:01:04,958 --> 01:01:07,628
And you'll always lose.
882
01:01:09,213 --> 01:01:11,381
Do we have a deal?
883
01:01:14,718 --> 01:01:16,345
Deal.
884
01:01:16,512 --> 01:01:17,513
All right.
885
01:01:22,142 --> 01:01:24,520
I don't think you should have
done that, doc.
886
01:01:24,686 --> 01:01:26,313
I have faith in my team.
887
01:01:28,273 --> 01:01:29,274
Crush them.
888
01:01:31,151 --> 01:01:32,820
Feeding time, boys.
889
01:01:39,827 --> 01:01:40,994
Goodbye.
890
01:01:48,168 --> 01:01:49,169
Fore.
891
01:01:54,716 --> 01:01:57,928
But, Mommy,
I don't want to go to school today.
892
01:01:58,971 --> 01:02:03,517
I want to stay home
and bake cookies with you.
893
01:02:05,727 --> 01:02:08,063
I'm open, I'm open.
- Lola, Lola, heads up.
894
01:02:08,522 --> 01:02:10,607
Oh!
Belly flop.
895
01:02:13,485 --> 01:02:14,987
Oh, my. Bugs!
896
01:02:15,821 --> 01:02:17,948
- Bugs!
- Is this your man?
897
01:02:19,700 --> 01:02:21,076
Are you okay?
898
01:02:21,201 --> 01:02:23,328
Me? Oh, yeah. I'm fine.
899
01:02:23,495 --> 01:02:25,080
Are you okay?
900
01:02:25,247 --> 01:02:27,374
Oh, Bugs. Thank you.
901
01:02:27,541 --> 01:02:29,209
Aw, it was nothing.
902
01:02:29,877 --> 01:02:33,797
That was the nicest thing anyone's
ever done for me.
903
01:02:38,051 --> 01:02:39,052
Time out.
904
01:02:42,598 --> 01:02:45,309
I could have been a contender.
905
01:02:45,476 --> 01:02:47,144
The Monstars. The Monstars.
906
01:02:47,311 --> 01:02:49,897
I could have had a...
- Clear!
907
01:03:04,119 --> 01:03:05,454
Okay.
908
01:03:06,914 --> 01:03:09,625
- We need a fifth player.
- Hey, coach, listen.
909
01:03:09,792 --> 01:03:12,878
You got any more secret stuff?
I think it's starting to wear off.
910
01:03:13,003 --> 01:03:15,297
It didn't wear off. It was just water.
911
01:03:15,464 --> 01:03:18,050
You guys had the special stuff
inside of you all along.
912
01:03:18,842 --> 01:03:21,303
Yeah, yeah, I knew that.
But listen, you got any more?
913
01:03:21,553 --> 01:03:24,890
I'll take some.
Yeah, uh, can I have some too?
914
01:03:26,225 --> 01:03:27,559
- Stan?
- Me?
915
01:03:29,061 --> 01:03:30,687
You're in at center.
916
01:03:30,854 --> 01:03:32,189
Just guard the big guy, okay?
917
01:03:32,356 --> 01:03:34,566
Guard him? Guard him? I'll smother him.
918
01:03:34,733 --> 01:03:38,737
I'll be all over him like a cheap suit.
I'll be on him like stink on rice.
919
01:03:38,904 --> 01:03:40,155
I tell you, he's going down.
920
01:03:46,745 --> 01:03:49,623
Michael, over here. Over here.
Over here, I'm open.
921
01:03:57,965 --> 01:03:59,216
Yes!
922
01:04:01,176 --> 01:04:02,719
Ha, ha. Nice sho...!
923
01:04:02,845 --> 01:04:05,597
Big man pancake.
924
01:04:06,807 --> 01:04:07,933
Ooh.
925
01:04:10,561 --> 01:04:12,646
Let's get him out of here.
926
01:04:32,040 --> 01:04:33,709
Eew.
927
01:04:34,751 --> 01:04:36,128
Oh, my.
928
01:04:42,885 --> 01:04:44,052
How'd he do that?
929
01:04:44,219 --> 01:04:46,889
Aw, anybody could do that, doc.
Even you.
930
01:04:47,055 --> 01:04:49,141
Watch this.
931
01:04:49,516 --> 01:04:52,311
No sweat. This is Looney Tune Land.
932
01:04:55,689 --> 01:04:58,859
Ten seconds to go?
Thanks for telling me, doc.
933
01:04:59,026 --> 01:05:02,279
I hate to be the bearer of bad news,
Your Airness...
934
01:05:02,404 --> 01:05:06,784
...but if you don't find a fifth player,
your team will forfeit the game.
935
01:05:06,950 --> 01:05:09,453
- Forfeit?
- Precisely, Sir Altitude.
936
01:05:09,828 --> 01:05:11,580
No way. We'll find someone.
937
01:05:16,418 --> 01:05:17,461
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
938
01:05:17,628 --> 01:05:19,755
I didn't know Dan Aykroyd
was in this picture.
939
01:05:20,255 --> 01:05:21,632
Hey.
940
01:05:22,257 --> 01:05:24,760
Perhaps I could be of some assistance.
941
01:05:25,677 --> 01:05:27,387
That's our fifth guy.
942
01:05:27,554 --> 01:05:30,182
Thanks, Bill.
Now you get to live your dream. Let's go.
943
01:05:30,349 --> 01:05:32,059
- All right.
- All right.
944
01:05:32,226 --> 01:05:34,478
- We need to score two points...
- Here's how I see it.
945
01:05:34,645 --> 01:05:35,646
- Duck.
- Yes.
946
01:05:35,813 --> 01:05:38,565
- Kick it to the girl bunny down in the post.
Yeah?
947
01:05:38,732 --> 01:05:40,651
- You dish it back to the guy bunny.
- Got it.
948
01:05:40,818 --> 01:05:43,237
- You swing it to Mike. You go to the hole.
- Bill.
949
01:05:43,403 --> 01:05:45,322
- And dominate.
- We're on defense.
950
01:05:45,447 --> 01:05:48,742
- Oh, yeah.
- Whoa. I don't play defense.
951
01:05:48,909 --> 01:05:51,036
- Typical.
- Gonna have to listen to Mike on this.
952
01:05:51,203 --> 01:05:55,666
Okay. Somebody steal the ball, get it to me
and I'll score before the time runs out.
953
01:05:56,458 --> 01:05:58,210
Don't lose that confidence. Okay.
954
01:05:58,377 --> 01:06:00,838
- Paws and wings in here. Okay.
Yes!
955
01:06:06,635 --> 01:06:08,554
This is why I was born.
956
01:06:08,720 --> 01:06:10,472
I thrive on pressure.
957
01:06:10,639 --> 01:06:14,017
- Excuse me, uh, sorry.
- Yo, yo, easy on the trousers, Daf. Easy.
958
01:06:14,184 --> 01:06:17,479
Pardon me. Mr. Murray,
something's really been bugging me.
959
01:06:17,646 --> 01:06:20,274
- Yeah?
- Just how did you get here anyway?
960
01:06:21,608 --> 01:06:24,528
Producer's a friend of mine.
Just had a teamster come and drop me off.
961
01:06:24,695 --> 01:06:26,280
Uh-huh.
962
01:06:26,447 --> 01:06:27,531
Well, that's how it goes.
963
01:06:28,282 --> 01:06:30,659
Hey, you see this, uh, kind of chunky
fellow over here?
964
01:06:32,327 --> 01:06:33,745
Uh-huh.
965
01:06:35,914 --> 01:06:39,168
- Oh. Oh, that's good. Oh, yes.
- Let's do it. You the duck.
966
01:06:39,418 --> 01:06:42,212
Now, let's all play fair. Here.
967
01:06:42,379 --> 01:06:44,214
Yo, spaceman. Don't choke now.
Come on.
968
01:06:44,381 --> 01:06:46,467
It's gut-check time.
969
01:06:50,053 --> 01:06:52,306
This must be mine. Woo-hoo!
970
01:06:52,473 --> 01:06:55,476
This belongs to me.
I'm going this way. I'm going left.
971
01:06:55,642 --> 01:06:58,145
Whoa! Don't ever trust an Earthling.
972
01:07:01,190 --> 01:07:02,191
Mike!
973
01:07:03,317 --> 01:07:05,611
Get the rabbit. Get the girl.
974
01:07:05,778 --> 01:07:07,279
Come on, come on. I'm open.
975
01:07:07,863 --> 01:07:08,822
I'm op...!
976
01:07:09,448 --> 01:07:11,200
- That's mine.
- Not today.
977
01:07:11,658 --> 01:07:14,036
Hey.
Bring it on, dude.
978
01:07:14,203 --> 01:07:16,497
BILL:
Whoopsie-daisy.
979
01:07:17,581 --> 01:07:19,208
You're mine.
980
01:07:27,257 --> 01:07:28,550
Mike, I'm open!
981
01:07:30,886 --> 01:07:31,970
Never mind.
982
01:08:05,879 --> 01:08:07,589
The Tunes win!
983
01:08:12,761 --> 01:08:13,929
That was a nice pass, man.
984
01:08:14,054 --> 01:08:16,098
That was a great stretch
for the basket too.
985
01:08:16,265 --> 01:08:19,852
You know, you really got some skills.
You might be able to play in the NBA.
986
01:08:20,561 --> 01:08:23,147
Thanks, Mike.
I'll probably quote you on that.
987
01:08:23,313 --> 01:08:26,275
But I'm gonna take this opportunity
to retire from the game.
988
01:08:26,442 --> 01:08:27,985
- No, come on.
- No.
989
01:08:28,152 --> 01:08:30,320
No, I'm gonna retire right now.
That's all there is to it.
990
01:08:30,487 --> 01:08:32,990
I'm gonna go out on top,
undefeated and untied.
991
01:08:33,157 --> 01:08:34,491
That's the way it's gonna be.
992
01:08:34,658 --> 01:08:37,077
- You go celebrate with your team.
- Come help us, man.
993
01:08:37,244 --> 01:08:41,874
I'd like to, but I have to ice down my knees
right away, okay? They're starting to go.
994
01:08:42,040 --> 01:08:44,626
- All right. Goodbye, man.
- All right, see you.
995
01:08:46,128 --> 01:08:49,631
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Definitely sure. Definitely.
996
01:08:50,549 --> 01:08:52,009
- Losers.
Sorry.
997
01:08:52,134 --> 01:08:53,719
- Choke artists.
- Sorry again.
998
01:08:53,886 --> 01:08:56,638
Wait till I get you back
on Moron Mountain.
999
01:08:57,973 --> 01:09:01,059
All right. The party's over.
Get in the spaceship.
1000
01:09:01,226 --> 01:09:02,770
Why do you take it from this guy?
1001
01:09:02,895 --> 01:09:05,147
Because he's bigger.
1002
01:09:05,314 --> 01:09:06,565
He's bigger?
1003
01:09:06,732 --> 01:09:09,151
Than we used to be.
1004
01:09:10,444 --> 01:09:11,779
What are you doing?
1005
01:09:12,696 --> 01:09:15,199
- Wait. What are you doing? Wait.
Come here.
1006
01:09:30,631 --> 01:09:32,549
Had it in you all the time, didn't you?
1007
01:09:34,593 --> 01:09:37,221
One thing, though.
Pass me the ball, Bugs.
1008
01:09:37,387 --> 01:09:39,056
You gotta give my friends
their talent back.
1009
01:09:39,890 --> 01:09:41,683
Do we have to?
1010
01:09:41,850 --> 01:09:44,311
Yeah, it's part of the deal.
Touch the ball.
1011
01:09:46,105 --> 01:09:48,315
Oh, okay.
1012
01:09:48,482 --> 01:09:51,193
Fair is fair.
- There you go. Touch it.
1013
01:09:57,950 --> 01:09:59,535
That was so much fun.
1014
01:09:59,701 --> 01:10:02,204
I feel so insignificant.
1015
01:10:02,371 --> 01:10:04,039
My clothes don't fit.
1016
01:10:04,206 --> 01:10:06,500
- What a trip.
- Ha, ha. I'm up for another one.
1017
01:10:06,667 --> 01:10:09,086
Can we ask you a favor, Mr. Bunny?
1018
01:10:09,253 --> 01:10:11,296
We don't want to go back
to Moron Mountain.
1019
01:10:11,463 --> 01:10:14,383
- We hate it up there.
- It stinks.
1020
01:10:14,550 --> 01:10:17,553
Um, I was thinking,
could we stay here with you?
1021
01:10:17,719 --> 01:10:19,304
Please.
1022
01:10:19,471 --> 01:10:20,889
Oh, brother.
1023
01:10:21,056 --> 01:10:23,308
Eh, I don't know if you guys
are looney enough.
1024
01:10:23,475 --> 01:10:24,852
Looney enough?
1025
01:10:31,692 --> 01:10:33,360
Michael, do you know what time it is?
1026
01:10:33,527 --> 01:10:36,655
Seven-fift... Seven-fift... Quarter past 7.
1027
01:10:36,780 --> 01:10:39,408
Exactly. You've got a baseball game
in five minutes.
1028
01:10:39,575 --> 01:10:41,368
Okay. Take this.
1029
01:10:42,453 --> 01:10:44,955
- Is it safe?
- Yeah, put it in my bag.
1030
01:10:45,122 --> 01:10:47,458
Okay. Let's go.
1031
01:10:47,583 --> 01:10:49,418
I really enjoyed playing with you guys.
1032
01:10:49,543 --> 01:10:51,086
You guys got a lot of, uh...
1033
01:10:52,212 --> 01:10:53,672
- A lot of, uh...
Yes?
1034
01:10:53,839 --> 01:10:55,924
Well, whatever it is, you got a lot of it.
1035
01:10:58,510 --> 01:11:00,345
All right. Gotta go.
1036
01:11:00,888 --> 01:11:02,431
- Bugs.
- Eh, Mike.
1037
01:11:02,598 --> 01:11:06,018
- Stay out of trouble.
- You know I will.
1038
01:11:06,143 --> 01:11:07,895
Come here.
1039
01:11:09,813 --> 01:11:11,231
Woo-hoo!
1040
01:11:11,607 --> 01:11:14,026
We want Michael! We want Michael!
1041
01:11:14,693 --> 01:11:17,821
The delay is killing us. Where's Michael?
1042
01:11:17,988 --> 01:11:19,573
Where is Michael?
1043
01:11:19,698 --> 01:11:21,658
Oh, he's not back from his other game.
1044
01:11:21,784 --> 01:11:23,535
- What other game?
- Shh.
1045
01:11:24,203 --> 01:11:25,537
Uh-uh. What other game?
1046
01:11:58,278 --> 01:12:00,405
Ladies and gentlemen...
1047
01:12:03,242 --> 01:12:04,868
...Michael Jordan.
1048
01:12:21,760 --> 01:12:24,471
Guys, we suck.
1049
01:12:24,638 --> 01:12:27,141
Yeah, man.
My grandmother plays better than I do.
1050
01:12:27,307 --> 01:12:30,894
At least you guys are still tall.
I'm nothing now. Just another short guy.
1051
01:12:31,061 --> 01:12:34,273
- You got that right.
- That's the only thing you got right.
1052
01:12:37,651 --> 01:12:38,694
- Who's that?
- Who's that?
1053
01:12:38,861 --> 01:12:41,405
I don't know.
- Been getting your butts kicked?
1054
01:12:41,572 --> 01:12:42,781
Who's that?
- It's Mike.
1055
01:12:42,906 --> 01:12:44,199
- What's up?
- Why are you here?
1056
01:12:44,366 --> 01:12:47,703
Don't be embarrassed. Just face it.
1057
01:12:47,870 --> 01:12:48,829
You guys stink.
1058
01:12:48,996 --> 01:12:51,665
- Come on, Mike. Lighten up.
- I know, man.
1059
01:12:51,832 --> 01:12:54,710
You want your games back, huh?
What little games you had to begin with.
1060
01:12:55,127 --> 01:12:57,588
- It's hard enough as it is, Mike.
- Give us a break.
1061
01:12:58,505 --> 01:13:00,257
I'm gonna regret this.
1062
01:13:01,425 --> 01:13:03,260
Stan, give me the ball.
1063
01:13:05,637 --> 01:13:07,014
Oh.
1064
01:13:07,347 --> 01:13:08,891
Look at that.
1065
01:13:09,057 --> 01:13:11,101
Looks like something from Star Trek.
1066
01:13:12,060 --> 01:13:14,897
- Touch it.
- No way, Jose.
1067
01:13:15,063 --> 01:13:18,525
Pat, you want your talent back?
You don't have any choice. Just touch it.
1068
01:13:19,359 --> 01:13:20,903
- I don't know.
- Don't touch it.
1069
01:13:21,069 --> 01:13:24,156
You're gonna walk around with a bad game
for the rest of your career.
1070
01:13:24,323 --> 01:13:25,908
Touch the ball.
1071
01:13:26,700 --> 01:13:28,577
Careful, Pat.
1072
01:13:30,245 --> 01:13:31,663
We've tried everything else.
1073
01:13:42,424 --> 01:13:45,177
Come on, Charles. Touch it.
1074
01:13:45,344 --> 01:13:47,805
The rest of you guys. Just touch it.
1075
01:13:53,685 --> 01:13:56,146
- What was that?
- I liked that, Mike.
1076
01:13:56,313 --> 01:13:58,148
Hey, I caught it.
1077
01:13:58,607 --> 01:14:00,943
Look at Muggsy handle the rock.
Handle it, baby.
1078
01:14:01,068 --> 01:14:04,071
- I can handle that rock again.
That's the old Muggs I know.
1079
01:14:04,238 --> 01:14:06,323
Yeah, get height now.
1080
01:14:06,573 --> 01:14:08,700
It gave me my powers back.
1081
01:14:08,826 --> 01:14:11,411
That wasn't bad.
Let me show you something.
1082
01:14:12,746 --> 01:14:15,541
- The Round Mound is back.
- Want to see something?
1083
01:14:17,167 --> 01:14:19,878
Oh, man. That felt good.
1084
01:14:22,047 --> 01:14:23,841
I got it.
You got it. Yeah, baby.
1085
01:14:24,007 --> 01:14:27,761
Hey, Michael. Why don't you stay,
play some three-on-three with us?
1086
01:14:27,928 --> 01:14:30,180
No, I don't think so.
1087
01:14:30,347 --> 01:14:32,224
You gonna work on that baseball swing?
1088
01:14:32,349 --> 01:14:36,186
Leave the baseball player alone.
He doesn't play basketball anymore.
1089
01:14:36,353 --> 01:14:38,439
He probably doesn't even
have it anymore, guys.
1090
01:14:38,605 --> 01:14:40,315
Michael, do you hear them?
1091
01:14:40,482 --> 01:14:43,193
They don't think
you can play the game anymore.
1092
01:14:46,655 --> 01:14:48,282
There's only one way to find out.
1093
01:14:52,536 --> 01:14:55,747
The Chicago Bulls welcome back...
1094
01:14:55,873 --> 01:15:00,752
...Michael Jordan!
1095
01:15:11,847 --> 01:15:13,974
What's the matter, Bill?
1096
01:15:15,976 --> 01:15:18,103
Larry, that could have been me.
1097
01:15:18,228 --> 01:15:22,941
Will you get off that kick?
It's over. It's done with. You can't play.
1098
01:15:25,861 --> 01:15:27,237
Okay.
1099
01:15:28,113 --> 01:15:30,407
Let's go, Bulls.
1100
01:23:18,333 --> 01:23:20,544
Well, that's all, folks.
1101
01:23:20,711 --> 01:23:22,838
That's my line.
1102
01:23:23,005 --> 01:23:26,008
Step aside, babe. Let a star do this.
1103
01:23:26,133 --> 01:23:27,593
That's all...
1104
01:23:27,760 --> 01:23:30,137
That's all, folks.
1105
01:23:31,096 --> 01:23:33,182
Can I go home now?
77383
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