All language subtitles for Crash and Burn s01e01 God Protect Us

Darren Cox!

Hey, you looking to buy some smokes,
buddy?

Real cheap, 20 bucks.

Come on, for you or anybody you know.

They suck.

Come on, man. I just got out of prison.
This was real sick trying to get to

Calgary, you know?

Bullshit.

I'll give you ten bucks.

All right.

How's it hanging? You all right? How the
hell do you think it's hanging?

How's it hanging?

With other insurance companies, you run
the risk of being left out, off the

books. But with Protected, there's
nowhere we won't go to make sure you're

covered.

Well, maybe the one place.

The client's name is Arno, Mr. Burns.
Some

sort of sex collision.

It's rapid response.

I'm Jimmy Byrne. I'm your protected rep.

Hey, state gal's already here.

What happened?

They ran the stop.

Passed backwards.

I gotta go. I'm not feeling good.

Hey, you want me to call you an
ambulance? We can get you to the

You die in there.

All right, why don't you hop in my ride,
and I'll drive you home on the way

back, okay? Okay, if I smoke.

Yeah.

What happened here, Sal?

Well, Tattoo Boy claims his brakes
failed.

He's lying, but it's cheap shit damage.
You pay for your guy, I pay for mine,

and we'll both hit him off with the
premiums.

Good to go? I want to see what the
ticker price is. Thank you, boy.

Okay, folks.

I'm sorry that was sick.

Yeah, just one more sec, Mr. A.

I told you I was sick.

All right, let's go, Mr. Ray.

Easy does. Keep the window open.

All right, yeah.

You're looking pretty happy for a guy
who's going to get hurled, huh?

It's a big day for me, Mr. Arnold.

Me and my fiancée.

Thousand bucks. Try two.

I've been divorced twice. I got a
daughter like me did.

Try selling it to some other sucker.

It's a client's car heading to a body
shop nightmare.

You've got a shitty job.

I like my job, Mr. Ray.

Beautiful day.

How many more layoffs, Dick?

Hey. Hey.

Well, Denver demanded 10 % cut for all
departments, but...

I went to the mad for us.

And I demanded from them... So how many,
Dick?

Oh, boy.

Eight or nine more.

Right. Okay.

Will I get in the chop?

Well... Denver wants at least one more
adjuster fired by the end of the week,

and you're low man on the totem pole, so
why don't you hit up Lady Di for some

pussy calls? You'd do okay. You'd be
safe. No one's safe, Walker. It's

insurance. We're looking particularly
hot today, Di.

Mr.

Papo has followed.

Mr. Byrne needs to learn that his job is
to save protected money.

Say goodbye to Bill, gentlemen.

Rumor is he won't be the last to go.
Check it out, Papa.

That's all you can walk in, eh?

I'm so sorry, Bill. You okay?

A little stunned, but thanks for the
opportunity.

Oh, you're welcome.

Hey, Bill.

See you at church on Sunday.

Louis Arno, has he lawyered up?

I'm not familiar with the legal. Does
Louis Arno have a lawyer?

Not yet.

Fettle him before he does.

I had a dream she was lactating battery
acid.

It's not that weird.

Hey, Lou.

Sammy, Sammy.

It's nobody's fault, okay? And we don't
use the A word.

Hey, sorry about that. Hey, what's up?

Oh, this stupid thing tonight. We don't
have to go, you know.

You've seen your grandmother with a
kitchen knife, right?

He's a priest to me. What's he going to
tell us about marriage preparation?

Is this a chicken streak I'm hearing?

Hey, I'll meet you at the church.

No bailing.

I love you.

I love you, too.

What do you got for me, Di?

Wait your turn, Mr. Byrne. I'll get to
you in a minute.

Bubble,

bubble, bubble.

Bubble!

What do you think this beautiful
insanity, what do you think? We fix or

chop -chop or farce or what? I already
told you.

You make decisions now.

Okay.

Stole it. Okay?

Yeah. Okay.

Okay.

Waters! Waters!

Change of plan.

Gotta move it out of here. We gotta move
it out of here. Oh, you got lost.

Ah, Monsignor.

Your wife.

What is good?

I better hit the road.

I love the bottom.

Only two away from the bottom, Mr.

Byrne. And this is not a good number for
you.

It's a high -end SUV.

Come on, Di, I've been to toll stores
three times this week on bullshit calls.

Grow a set.

What's the file on the SUV?

Front -end damage?

Was. Now stolen.

100 grand liability, Mr. Byrne.

Hey, good luck, buddy.

Crick a leg, pal.

It's meat.

Ass meat.

What the hell is this?

You not estimate by 10 grand.

It's my boss. He's red flagging all my
claims here. I got it from a phone.

Something. It's okay.

It's okay.

Hey.

Jimmy Insurance.

I hear my client's SUV's been stolen off
your lot.

Do you have any suspects?

I read the police report. I did.

How much did it cost you?

Are you killing a cat?

No, I love pussy.

Listen, the car you lost, it's coming
out of your shop insurance, not my

My body shop insurance is protected
also, Jimmy. I am very loyal to you.

I'm going to find it. Yes.

You're going to fix it. Yes.

You're going to eat it. No.

You're going to eat it.

This is what?

Always a big pain in the ass.

Okay, so each week we concentrate on
building communication in different

Truth, respect and trust, sexuality, an
intimate marriage, family background.

Maybe we should start with that, yeah?

I'm sure there's a few things you could
tell me about the Silva's father.

I don't really know what you want me to
say. Start with your family.

What they're like, where they're from.

From here, I guess.

Father, I don't see what this has to do
with... I don't really have a family.

I have a mom, kind of.

I had one foster mom. I liked her. So
you're from a broken home.

It wasn't really a home to break.

Okay. I want you to work on a little
exercise for the next session.

There's a program on here which helps
you put together a collage.

You pick pictures which best represent
your dreams of the future, and you drag

those onto your goal page.

Do this individually, and then we'll
compare them.

There's some intimacy exercises as well.

Those... Those you can do together.

Oh, my God.

Goal page?

Tell me this, tell me that. Come on,
hey, it wasn't that bad.

Uh, it was horrible.

We're not going back.

I don't care if we have to get married
in a shed.

Oh, yeah?

And I will show you the minimistic
exercise.

Hey, no, no, no. You slow down.

Give me your key.

You don't want to do that.

Jimmy,

welcome to the De Silva's family.

Thank you.

You knew?

I wanted you to have a real ring.

I got you this.

Oh, my God, Jimmy.

Oh, my God.

That is gorgeous.

How much did you pay for that?

Come on, Jimmy, spill.

Teresa.

Oh, boy, you don't say nada mal.

Jimmy,

it's too much.

I'm good for it, though.

Betsy Osler, auto and household theft.

Come on, Di, she's up in Tony Creek.

I gotta go see the crooked bull. Then
give it to Papa. I have five calls

already. I'm home.

work, Papo. I need this job.

The bald guys love you, Dad.

Mr. Galindo, you have a call on the
cat's pole. Hey, Carla, the lady died

slipped to me. The O's in the file. Hey,
give it to me.

Oh, that's a month of Sunday. Rapid
response, Mr. Galindo. I'm coming.

At Protected Insurance, we're serious
about rapid response.

The best rates, the best service. Let
Protected quote you.

What's the most common mistake victims
make?

I would say it's not seeking the counsel
of a professional advocate.

Really? Absolutely.

An advocate is just that. An advocate
gives voice to people who need help the

most. We're going to take another call.
All right.

Looks like you took a turn for the worse
there, Mr. Ray.

You a Tavis fan, Lewis?

What the hell does that mean?

My daughter's old stuff.

Listen, as I said on the phone, a pit
meeting is where we two try to reach a

settlement fair to all parties.

I'm the party pissing in the bag.

In return for you, John Hancock,
Protected will pay you $5 ,000 to

for it. That's what this is worth.

I gotta be frank here, Lewis.

We know you had cystitis before the
accident. Your own neurologist said so.

He's a prick.

I'm ready to cut you a check here and
now.

No lawyer's gonna jump on this. They'll
delay, delay, delay.

I've got a lawyer.

Mr. J. Pound. I seen him on the TV.

Ow!

All right, what if I could go a bit
higher?

Say, 15 grand?

Could you lose the lawyer then? No
commission.

15.

You swear?

I gotta run it by legal first, but yeah.

Bye -bye, shyster.

Go, Tabby's, go.

Luthorno, now piss in the bag.

We got a lawyer, but I told him I'm
taking 15 grand.

Lawyer out.

Jay Pound at a Goldman firm.

15 is too high. Oh, come on, counselor.
I said no. Is there a problem?

You have a nice day.

Protective.

The name you can trust.

Your numbers are looking sickly, Dick.

The name you can trust.

We're all underwater this quarter.

I got a question for you, Dick.

Is Canada a country?

What was that, Lyle?

Is it a country?

Because you make it sound like a special
need.

Hey, Lionel, I gotta go fight some fraud
here, okay, my friend?

Coming up, sir, with a jar of X -Lac.
Stick getting spanked by Denver?

What else is new? What's up?

I got this personal injury file up on
the leaderboard. I need to close it

The iron lady won't approve the price
tag, so I figure I gotta show fraud to

some leverage with the client.

Mr. Arno. Is it fraud?

Better be, or I'm screwed.

All right, I'll take a look. No, no,
you're too busy. I'm not as busy as I'll

if the Dixter kicks you to the curb,
huh?

All right, thanks, Sheriff.

All right, Deputy.

You were supposed to be at

the bulls a half hour ago, Mr. Byrne.

It's a rapid response.

Manifold, carburetor, anything else?

Transmission has to be resealed.

All NOM parts?

Can't. Customer check.

Oh, yeah. Miriam Strickland's going to
be climbing under her hood to look at

manifold. The policy says manufacturer
parts only.

Yeah, best effort.

What about the door?

Beat it out.

Screw you.

It'll never shut right.

Hey, Leon. Yeah, what's up?

You can fit this door like a bumbleclat
love glove, right?

Sixty bucks an hour times four.

Why do you want to bust my balls?

Oh, real nice, Bull.

Looks like they came from a brand new
infinity.

What's going on here, Bull?

You used to get your stolen parts from
the eye ties. Now you're stepping out

with the flog? You're the crook, Vern.

Hey, you want me to teach you, Mr. Bull,
huh?

Can you tell me where that car is?

You give me these parts or I tear up
this and every estimate that ever comes

through here.

Today's not the day to be pissing on
you.

Hey, did Infinity come in here in 2009?

You doing your Jimbo?

Looking for a client's car, are you?

Oh, you know, trying to sell some
protected write -offs for scrap.

Trying to make myself look good on the
dickhead's leaderboard.

Oh, shit, isn't that your car?

Jesus, man, I'm sorry.

Real good eyes, Rick.

That is one ass -licking liability
against you.

Good luck trying to close it.

Come by the cork. I'll buy you a pot.

Okay.

Hey, hey, hey.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What?

What you doing here with this shit? I
need it by Friday.

Here's your estimate.

20 grand tops.

Oh, interesting.

Do you want me to have your lot
insurance tripled?

Why don't you grab me a little shit?

All right.

Here's a crazy idea.

Why don't we try and act like we're
professionals here, Pavel, huh?

I, as an insurance adjuster, give you a
repair bill.

You, as the body shop owner, agree in
good faith to fulfill the contract's

terms. Are you with me so far?

Okay, Jimmy.

Because you are so nice.

He's done.

I'm not dicking around here, Korkov.

It's Friday.

Off my plate by Friday.

Friday.

Make it done.

Did they run those tests on you at
Neptune Rehab?

What, aspirin? Yeah.

My penis is burning.

Well, we all have our crosses to bear.

The protected bastard tried to get me to
settle.

You knew about the lung trouble?

I'm sorry.

So what can you do for me?

Well, it's not going to be relevant to
your car injuries, but I'd like to

disclose your other health concerns to
the insurance provider.

I might give them a...

Little, you know, nudge on the
compassion front here.

Usky -wee -wee.

Up on your feet, guy.

Come on, do your Vanna White thing.

You high?

The Toyota at Bull's shop?

Clone. At 3 ,500 bucks.

Mrs. Bessie Osler, full and final for
the princely sum of

$150. For what?

She's a wound. I got $150 in
discretionary spending, and she took it.

go. Item three.

The SUV at Tolstoy Auto Body.

Back on the road for 20 Gs.

Put him up to hire.

There's been another theft at the
Tolstoy lot, Mr. Byrne.

Your SUV has been stolen again.

Welcome to last place in open liability.

Oh, fuck!

Make it good.

Oh, it doesn't have to be this way.

You're a businessman. I'm a businessman.

Like I said, he's a real pain in the
ass.

It's okay, he's a pussy.

You're sure she's 25?

Of course.

He's so tempting.

I got bills to pay out the bottom
drawer.

Thank you, sweetheart.

You're a colleague.

It's Jimmy.

Don't worry about him. He is so fired.
No, no, no. I like him.

He's a scrapper.

You tell him if I can help him, I will
help him.

Maybe I steal him another car.

Like the one he lost, okay?

Uh, yeah, sure. Okay.

Oh, hey, puppy.

Is he a top or bottom guy?

Well, he's one or the other. I mean, he
can't live on this salary, right?

I'm losing my job, Lou.

I didn't want you to worry.

What's wrong with you?

I didn't know.

I couldn't tell you.

It's just a job thing.

Do you think I can get another one?

All I want is in.

That's all I want.

I don't give a damn about the rest.

Everything.

I love you.

How long

has he been in there?

Why not just fill up that freaking piss
bag?

I don't know, Walker. I think the guy's
pretty sick.

It's a lot more than cystitis.

Oh, deputy.

A just as clear inventory.

Investigators prove fraud.

If you start feeling sorry for the
client... I didn't say that. Yeah, you

You kind of did.

Here we go.

I learned one really great life lesson
when I was a kid. There's this old I

lady who ran a local neighborhood
grocery store.

Every time we went there she made all of
us kids turn on our pockets everybody

still

Niagara

Falls that the longest piss in the
history of the world away

None of it going in the bag.

Everybody still.

Um, I, that's my key.

I locked them inside.

Hold on.

Walker and I helped you last night.

The accident did squat to him.

Oh, wow, these are very, very good.

He does, however, have lung cancer,
third stage.

Maybe half a year.

Should we back off?

Why? We didn't give it to him.

Thank you.

Hey.

You make an excellent thief.

How's it hanging, Mr. Ray?

Mr. Arnold.

Thank you for coming in today.

You're without counsel?

Said he had to come late.

You got a join us in here, Mr. Lewis?

Get you a coffee?

No, can't.

Prick. Okay, you, no rowdy stuff, all
right?

Thank you, I owe you.

Okay, five minutes. Be good.

Jimmy.

I think the new Catherine's a guy.

I'm sorry I'm late. Chloe wasn't feeling
herself.

Come on. Brad will take care of her.

Hey, Chloe.

So, this is your new nanny?

Uh, no. Brad Marshall.

Jay's partner.

Like father, like daughter.

The urologist's statement indicates your
client suffered from ulcerative

cystitis before the accident.

And these clearly demonstrate that his
condition has not deteriorated since. If

anything, it's improved.

Well, I will, um, of course dispute
that. And what you're ignoring is that

trauma my client suffered has impacted
on his cancer treatments.

4 ,000 minus your cut.

Or hope your client doesn't die before
we go to trial in three years.

I'll take it.

Hell with all of you.

Won't you ever come in here using our
daughter or your boy toy's props again?

You need to get over yourself,
Catherine. I'll take that under

uh, Mr. Arnold.

Want that coffee now?

Good girl for your money.

I will.

All right.

Bye. Bye.

Mr. Rohn, Mr. Rohn, no, no, no, no!

Wow!

Good work, Jimmy.

You all have a good day.

So, how was your time with Daddy?

Okay. Daddy's going to buy a new house.

I think he wants to get married again.

Did he say that to you?

Well, they were talking about it.

Do you think I could maybe be a flower
girl?

Hey,

check me that.

That stolen car from Tolstoy is really
messing you up on the board, right?

People owe me some favors, you say the
word.

See what I can do. No, I'm good. Good?

You're almost out of a job.

All right.

How much you get?

$400 ,000.

When I die, she gets... All right.

There is an alternative here, Mr. A.

When a policyholder is terminally ill,
they can elect to take what is called

accelerated benefits.

It's a lower payment now.

Nothing to the estate.

In your case, that would be $60 ,000.

What's in this for you?

My job, maybe.

You're good at it.

You're a good liar and a cheat.

What do you want to do here, Mr. Ray?

Screw the pooch.

Whoever you are, you get to go around
only once.

Eh? Enjoy it if you can.

I didn't wake you, did I?

Mm -mm.

What you doing?

Working on my sexy priest assignment.

I'm trying to decide if I should put you
in it or not.

Can I see?

No, thank you.

No, stop, stop, stop.

Hey.

Where's your ring?

I don't need it.

We can't afford it. Don't.

Don't do that.

You know it's important to me.

Okay.

I'll do that soon, okay?

There's no calls on my screen and none
in my basket.

Jimmy.

Can I see you for a sec?

Yeah.

Sit down, Jimmy. No, Dick, I gotta say
my piece.

Look, these things are never easy.

You've got to sign off on this Arno
file.

I did sign off on the Arno file. This is
his life insurance policy.

His daughter was paying on it. He didn't
know.

He's willing to take 60 grand now versus
400 ,000 to his estate in, what, six,

seven months?

That's a good deal for protected.

I negotiated that with him last night.
Let me get this straight.

You went to the same guy who... Pissed
all over you. The same old guy who's

dying.

And you got him to screw his daughters
to protect and save the little money.

Well, you must really love this job.

Why?

I'm good at it.

Dick, I know I've only been here a year,
and I know that I'm behind on the

leaderboard, but are numbers all that
matter in insurance?

That... That's what I can do.

about all this stuff.

Tell us about Jimmy.

You a family man?

I'm getting there. I guess I'm engaged.

Nice. Nice.

What are your goals here at Protected?

I want to make a difference.

I hope that we can go together.

Oh, no, not my jujubes. Sorry, Dick.
Just leave them.

Go. Go.

I see my ass, please.

No way.

No goddamn way.

Rick, I know this is hard. You dickhead!

You're a fraud!

Easy. You sanctimonious prick! Security!

You can take a long heart stuck on my
arse!

Get out of there!

Suck on my...

Mabel? In my office, please.

Mine smells like piss.

So does his.

Did you tell me that you did not sleep
with Dickie DeMaio?

Not yet.

Good man.

Maybe.

Everybody steals.

No one loses shit.

This is the office for us coming to our
bar.

Vic doesn't even drink.

We should go to his church.

Yeah, see how he likes it.

Gentlemen, cigarettes.

Enough. Thanks.

Ladies, cheap cigarettes, 20 bucks.

A little cheap.

Just got out of prison, eh?

Sister's sick. Trying to go see her in
Calgary.

Hey, no soliciting. I saw solicitation.
Look, I'm going to buy a drink, right?

Get out.

Whoa.

Hey, man.

I'll take care of it for you, Megan.

I've been hanging, man, a long time.

The guy you think you're talking to,
he's not here.

You understand?

Tell Jerry.

You take your smokes, and you walk out
of this bar, and you don't come back.

Because if you do, that guy you knew,
he's going to break your neck.

But you know him.

You know that guy's good for him.

Thank you.

Friend of yours?

Not like you, Counselor.

Hey.

Thanks, Judy.

Anytime, Maggie.

Mother around.

It's on me.

Thanks, Maggie.

Thank you.

To Ricky and Bill and all the other dead
soldiers.

God protect them.

Because insurance won't.

Amen, brother.