Original subtitles

Lakshina Sumati was in town for the premiere of her movie, Churalia High

Party. A Bollywood time was had by all. Up next for the young Indian star is a

Buzz interview.

Your interview's going international. This is huge, Noah.

Huge, Noah? I like the sound of that. Can I use that for my byline? I need you

to be serious.

This interview's a major cross -promotion with Buzz India.

Couldn't the cross -promotion just be some butter chicken and naan? That is

exactly the kind of joke I don't want you to make with your interview with

Lakshina about her CD.

DJ, a little credit here. Name one time I messed up an interview.

Oh, there was the Lance Prescott calamity, the Ashley Leggett disaster,

Trinity Sway slip -up, and the Arcade Fire fiasco.

I can't believe she forgot about the Nickelback nightmare.

I would have opened with that one.

Find out what's new, who's practicing on who, and who's after what's new.

It's a whole new scene in the pages of my magazine.

The debate is fun.

I want to know it is not fun.

What's in and what's out? I'm going to find out from everyone talking about.

The debate is fun.

I want to know it is not fun.

Detention, I knew I never should have trusted you to do your half of the

assignment. Dude, how was I supposed to know that basketball star Steve Nash

wasn't the son of broadcaster Nolte Nash?

I don't know.

Book, the internet, ask Steve Nash's dad.

Mr. Shepard is going to be so mad. I am so great. I am so great. Who is so

great? Who is so great?

I am so great.

Now may be a good time to tell him I broke his wall flyer.

Williamson? Hey, it's me, Andrew Shepard.

Yeah, looks like the Ernie Coombs Teacher of the Year contest has been

down to the two of us once again.

Only difference is, this time I'm in it to win it, Williamson.

Oh, Mr.

W., he is good.

Oh, I know he's good, Wilder. He's beaten me five times in a row. Last

beat me by one vote. One measly vote.

I have an idea that'll help you win, Mr. Shepard.

Is it finding two more people to vote for me?

I'll get way more than two people. With my savvy, I'll give your campaign some

much -needed pizzazz.

I can help, too. I can give your campaign some much -needed pizzazz

Fantastic, guys. Let's do this.

Let's start by coming up with a catchy slogan. How about, uh, have your ship

heard the news?

Don't quit your day job.

Yeah, what is that you do anyway?

I'm a teacher. Right, right, right. Keep forgetting.

No wonder I voted for Mr. Williamson last year.

That was you?

Mother.

Rebecca, I just read the first draft of your article.

Money -saving tips for the frugal student?

And? Who knew you were so funny?

Purchase clothes at the end of the season?

Pure joke.

And borrow from the library instead of buying?

Amanda, this is a serious article.

You should put a disclaimer up front.

Old clothes and used books aren't going to help anyone. If you have cash

problems, you don't save money, you make money.

Ever heard of the stock market?

Yeah, because it's so easy for kids to invest in the stock market. Moo.

You're right. If that wasn't easy at all, it must have taken me five seconds.

Try renting a library book that fast.

Borrow. The word is borrow.

Junior traders.

New kids on the stock.

So, how does it work?

Your initial investment is $10. After that, you, like, buy and sell stocks to

please.

Fine. I owe you $10.

Start account.

Typey, typey. Username.

Typey, typey. Password.

There. You have an account.

All you have to do is pick your first stock.

How about that one? Do not industry.

Good call.

There. You now own 20 shares.

OMG. What? What? You just doubled your money.

Papa needs a new pair of shoes.

Lexina, let's talk about your experience with the naked rump... Bad, Noah.

No.

Tomb bat.

I hear one got loose on the set of your last video. Is that true?

Yes, Noah, but since these bats are harmless, there was no threat.

Besides, I'm more worried about you than a naked rump bat.

That's what DJ wrote on my last performance review.

So, have you ever been kid... I'm warning you, DJ.

The sun on a summer day in Jaipur.

Yes, many times.

Jaipur is my favorite city in the whole world.

One last question.

Ah, here it is.

Do you think all Indian music sounds the same?

And there it is.

Yes, Noah, all Indian music sounds the same, just like all rock and roll sounds

the same.

That's a little narrow -minded.

Rock is so inside your heart that sometimes you just... Find yourself

it, and you don't even know it. And when have you ever caught yourself singing

an Indian song? And if you did, could you tell which one?

This interview is over.

Let's call this one the Lakshmi Catastrophe.

I deserve that.

We want Mr. Shepard to win this. We'll need fresh ideas.

I just gave you a fresh idea. Putting Mr. Shepard's name on a rocket ship

exceeds our $6 budget.

Fine, I'll compromise. We'll shoot him out of a cannon.

And we're done before dawn.

I bought some licorice.

Don't take this personally, but I'm going to give you a simple job so you

mess up. Why would I take that personally?

Because it's completely personal and directed specifically at you.

In that case, I'm a little hurt.

Tomorrow at lunch, I want you to drop all these Bolt Mr. Shepard balloons off

the third floor balcony.

Can I trust you to do that without fooling around?

Dude, you have my word. I'll be the most responsible guy in balloon -dropping

history. Thanks.

I appreciate you taking this so seriously.

It's a horsey.

A serious horsey.

Noah, please, may we speak?

Let me guess. You ready to admit that all your music does sound the same?

Only if you're ready to admit that you're an ill -informed Claude.

I'm not.

But DJ can give you the official apology form that does.

Why are you here?

I'm at your school to talk about my culture.

Things like how even though my music may sound the same to some, in my country

it is much loved.

Look, maybe I shouldn't have said that.

So you're admitting you were wrong.

Like I said, it's all in DJ's form.

That's okay. I understand the unchained ear of a boy.

Perhaps my country's music may sound a bit similar.

Yeah, if by a bit similar you mean exactly the same.

That is why I want you to listen to these songs.

Do you guys have MP3 players?

No, in my country we only have MP2 players.

That was a joke, gada.

Gada? It means donkey.

In Hindi, the gada is a symbol of folly, so it suits you.

I must go, but we can meet after school so I can get my MP2 player.

And see you.

Got it going on.

Right now?

Wilder's dropping hundreds of Vote Shepherd balloons.

But what's most important is your speech at tomorrow's assembly.

These things are won or lost with that speech. Not to worry. I worked on it all

night long. There is nothing stopping me from winning this thing now.

Mr. Rath!

Michael! Wilder, you're supposed to be doing the balloon drop.

Pulled it off. The whole school was talking about it.

Yes! You know, I underestimated you. I know I... Those

balloons, they didn't happen to be water balloons, did they?

Of course!

Williamson, Shepard here.

Stop laughing. That could have happened to anybody.

We will overcome.

Will we?

I have an idea.

If it's that rocket ship idea, you'll be very sorry.

Good article on junior traders, kiddo. Uh -huh.

Do you really change the way readers are going to look at their allowance?

Yeah, huh.

Rebecca Harper is a huge ink pad who has potatoes growing out of her ears. I

hear you, DJ. I'm just not paying attention.

No! That's my money button!

We need to talk.

I'm just checking my portfolio.

I'm up $6 ,500.

I think it's great that you're making money, Rebecca, but you need to be

careful. The stock market is a very risky venture.

That's smart advice, DJ.

Thank you so much for guiding me through my young and impressionable years.

You're welcome. I'm glad I can make such a difference.

Broker Harper here. The stock is undervalued, and I'm fencing market

Buy, buy, buy!

Look at her. I haven't felt this way about anyone since Rebecca. And I bet

Lakshina's never kissed some English dude named Elliot.

He's on top of the Eiffel Tower under the full moon in Paris. I think it's

you let it go.

I'm going to ask Lakshina to rock, go steak, and saddle.

Girls love that place. Yes, they do.

You know what they don't love?

Water balloons.

No kidding.

I was surprised, too.

Girls make no sense at all.

Oh, quick. Here she comes. Ah, cool.

Namaste, gata. So, did you listen to any songs yet?

Not yet, but I was hoping we can listen to them when I take you to Roscoe's

Steak and Saddles.

Please don't take this personally.

Oh, oh, oh. I've been down this route before. Do not ask her what she means.

Trust me.

In my religion, the cow is sacred. We would never put it on a plate with a

order of kosa and a dill pickle.

Well, actually, it comes with potato salad, but probably not the point.

It was my hope that you liked me enough to take an interest in my culture.

I guess that hope was misplaced.

You can take me to Roscoe's Steak and Saddles.

I've had a bad day.

India gained its independence from Great Britain in 1947 after a struggle that

was marked by widespread non -violent resistance.

Namaste, Rajkumari.

Rajkumari?

A Hindi word for princess.

All I got was arr.

Hey, Sergeant Pepper, what happened to the lonely hearth?

I think the dry cleaner's lost your collar. Not to mention your spot at our

lunch table.

Okay, guys, you might act like this in Mr. Williamson's class, but not in mine.

Vote Shepard.

That collar is a Neru collar named for Prime Minister Neru, who is also dashing

and charismatic like Gadda.

Now you won't find magic like this in Mr. Williams' class.

The tech sector's dividend yield is impressive.

Pour everything into tech.

What are you doing here, lunch? All the computers at school were taken.

The kids are using them to do homework.

Rebecca, this is wrong.

You've become too invested in investing.

You're a little young to be handling this kind of money.

Well, I seem to be handling it just fine.

The way I figure, I'll be a millionaire in less than a... Oh, dear.

What is it? I just lost everything.

Well, the good news is you still live at home.

You've lost everything?

Son of a... Green.

Hey, Mr. Shepherd, what's up?

Oh, just about to enjoy some shepherd's pie.

I was going to have waffles, but my waffle iron's broken.

I know nothing about that.

What's up, Wilder? I know I wreck things, but I want you to know I've got

couple tricks up my sleeve to help you out. No need. I plan on winning all of

the students back when I talk to them later on.

You should really listen to the stuff I have up my sleeve.

All right, sleeve me.

Number one.

Phone Mr.

Williamson and give him the old raspberry.

Nothing like going... to make you feel better.

Can I check the other sleeve?

Sure, I saved the best for last anyway.

What does shepherd mean?

Oh, right now it means a piece of meaty pie I'm not getting to, but normally it

means a man who tends sheep.

Exactly.

And in a way, you're a shepherd to all of us. So that's why... Why

are those sheep running rampant in the hallway?

Please tell me you didn't fill the hallway with sheep.

What is this?

Tandoori tacos.

In honor of you, Rajkumari.

Tacos? Well, we also have an exchange student visiting from Mexico.

Ah.

I listen to your MP2s and love them, especially that third track.

I Love You Forever, My Angel is a very moving song. I know.

And even though I didn't understand a word, I felt everything they were

about. I am all about the India.

Really? Because it sounds to me you only went online.

And yes, we have the internet in my country.

Tell me about it. I've been on hold on many of your call centers.

Tell you what.

Have your driver take you to Turtle Park today at 3 .30.

Trust me on this.

Then at Turtle Park I will be.

I'm done.

Me too.

I can't believe you released a hundred sheep into the school. I can't believe

how much poop these fluffy guys can make. I can't believe I'm talking to

can't believe I'm listening to you. I can't believe you think you've got

something better to do than listen to me. I can't believe I'm playing the I

Can't Believe game when I should be doing this.

Watch it.

We are so over.

Finally, something we agree on.

Boys!

Enough. My class, after school.

I can't believe you. I said enough!

So, how much did you lose?

Nothing. I sold everything before the crash and made a killing.

In fact, some people are blaming the whole crash thing on me.

Whatever.

Whatever? I lost $30 ,000.

That was going straight to my education fund.

How are we going to pay for a real education with fake money?

What are you talking about?

Junior Traders isn't a real stock market.

It's a simulated game to help teach kids how they might be able to make money on

the stock market.

Why didn't you say that in the first place?

I did. Remember when I told you I said you like buy and sell stock as you

please?

But you always use like when you shouldn't. Yesterday you said you were

mad, yet you really had a tantrum.

Yeah, I did.

That's like pretty funny. So all that money I made and lost wasn't real?

Nope, all virtual. Good thing too, because you stink at playing this dog

You're going to like chase me now, aren't you?

Like, yeah.

Okay. Open your eye.

I know we just had my birthday, but next year, you're not invited.

I know you just had a birthday. I gave you cufflinks. Thanks, by the way.

welcome.

But it looks like you won't be getting the matching helmet next year.

Who has a high tea birthday party anyway? People who appreciate little

sandwiches.

Boys, I want you to sit there and watch this slideshow presentation.

Wow. Of all the slideshows that make me grateful for what I have, I was the

best.

Friends?

Friends.

One question, though.

With your Teacher of the Year speech, when did you have time to do this?

I didn't give my speech. I spent all afternoon figuring out how to show you

that you're still friends.

But if you didn't give that speech, then you have virtually no chance of

winning. No.

Thanks, Mr. Shepard. Yeah, thanks, Mr. S.

You'll always be our Teacher of the Year.

Although, if you'd waited a day, we wouldn't have gotten over this on our

We're always fighting, making up, fighting, and making up. It's what we

Seriously?

Guys, come on!

Williamson can't win. Nobody heard my speech.

Students of Ernie Coombs, I live to teach.

I can't believe you told him that.

I can't believe I voted for Mr. Williamson again.

Thank you for the dance.

It was cute.

Does cute mean in India what it means here? Not interested?

I like you, Kata. I do.

But you know why we could never be?

Because I missed three steps in the dance. Give me another shot.

It's not that.

The tandoori tacos?

It should have been, but it wasn't the tacos.

Because your culture would never allow such forbidden love?

No, it's because I'm a Bollywood star who's too busy for a boyfriend.

Even one as sweet as you.

So, does this mean you want your MP2 player back?

No, it's time I upgraded to the third B.

Keep it, so you can remember me. I know I will always remember you, Gadda.

Namaste. Namaste.

You gotta admit, it's catchy.

Yeah.

Is it possible to lose something even though you never really had it?

Oh, yeah.

$30 ,000 worth of possible.

So, did you get there?

Nope. The deal's still on? You gotta kiss a girl before we're even?

Yep.

Oh, well.

Hey, do you want to go to Roscoe's Steak and Salad?

Yeah, I love that place.

But you're paying.

Paying? I spent all my money on the courtside pajama.

Well, I lost $30 ,000.

Well, easy come, easy go.

Don't feel bad. You may have lost Teacher of the Year, but you definitely

Boyfriend of the Year.

Well, it's not Teacher of the Year, but I'll take it.

I'll meet you in the car, doofus.

Williamson, Shepard here.

I just wanted to call you to congratulate you on your win.

Oh, and one last thing.

Oh,

that did feel good.