Original subtitles

Amanda! I've got the worst news!

Yolanda Farquhar moved back to town!

And? And?

You haven't met Yolanda because if you had, there would be no and!

Get to the point before I'm recruited to clown college!

Hey, sure.

Nine years ago, I showed up in my best suits to Yolanda's birthday bash. But oh

-ho! There is no bash!

There's just me, Yolanda, and a tillage donkey for three hours straight!

Escaped out the bathroom window.

It... Sounds like a little girl with a crush. I'm sure she's harmless.

Hi,

Michael Davies. Can you believe it's been nine years? I knew we'd have a lot

catching up to do. So, guess what? I arranged that we're lab partners.

Excellent. I have my own microscope.

And frog. Maybe we can finish that game of pin the shell on the donkey.

I hope you're so small not to fit through the bathroom window.

Watching the time pass, I wait to get out and hang out with my friends. Find

what's new, who's publishing on who, and who's bad for what's new.

It's a whole new thing, in the pages of my magazine.

The debate is fun, I wonder what it is.

Here's one. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up on its own?

Because it was too tired.

Too tired. Too tired. Genius. It's funny because bicycles don't sleep.

Walter and Walter's friends.

Oh, hello.

Taking a break from magazine writing, I see.

Very good.

Anyhoo, our case fires at the water factory this Friday. We should go.

Um, Daddy said I could help out with the Buzz launch party for Kazoom Energy

Drink. As long as they don't bring home a bottle for Stepmom.

LOL.

My article on... Anyway, gotta go.

Derek has to go to the bathroom, too.

How did you know?

I've just been anywayed.

This is what it feels like to be Rebecca.

Still sending those alien emails to Wilder?

He keeps writing back.

I'm actually updating the teen buzz page on Gleeopedia.

And giggling. Girls giggle. I'm guffawing. Like a man.

Teen Buzz Magazine is by teens, for teens, and about teens. From fashion

and don'ts to gaming tips and trends, Buzz has it all.

Not one joke.

I'm impressed.

Read on.

In so many words, calmest, Rebecca Harper, that's me, covers school issues

she's not touring the globe as rap star crush party ice?

Rap star?

It was a surprise to me, too.

With her jerky arm movements and permanent overbite, Crush Party Ice

thrilling, chilling event?

Noah, get online and delete this now.

My genius won't be silenced by you, even if you are an international rap star.

Don't hurt me, Crush Party Ice. You need those arms for dancing. Noah!

Gosh, nine years, Michael Davies. Where does the time go?

Apparently not on new clothes.

When my dad's research took us to Whitehorse, I thought I'd never see you

but here we are.

So our project should... Guess what?

I collect banana labels now. You have to see my album. My cousin says I could

make money off it.

Yolanda, can we stick to the project? Have you ever thought of going into

pictures? With your beautiful bone structure and my screenplay, it's a no

-brainer. Yolanda, we need... Yes, my bone structure could make magic out of

script. But let's focus on the science project.

I need a mind map of how we can approach it.

Right here is my brain. And shooting out from all directions are the approaches

to a presentation.

Yeah.

Here's what's going to happen. I've basically done it.

You just need to check it over.

No, no, no, no, no.

No, this will never do. It looks like you wrote it on your way over here.

We have to take our time with this.

Use the mind map.

I already have a map to my house. You don't need one to my head.

What a kooky cookie.

Now, I'll go order us some smoothies. We've got a long night ahead of us.

I'm just a little confused.

I can help. If they won't let you eat popcorn, it's a live movie.

Get back to me. My treat.

Have you ever noticed Wilder acts differently around his friends? No?

Have you noticed that an online encyclopedia says I'm a rap star who

dance? Trust Party Ace. LOL.

I already sent the link to everyone on Gleebook.

Amanda, how do you expect to maintain your fan base?

Look, Father's really freaking me out. Here, he's all, want to go to a live

movie, but outside, he completely ignores me.

I was telling him about concerts and energy drinks, and he cut me off with...

Anyway, gotta go.

Gotta go.

How did you like it?

Bad enough she kept me at the blurb the whole nine o 'clock talking about

photosynthesis, then she called me from home and yacked for another hour. I

remember Yolanda being very nice.

What's first grade? You thought anyone who didn't push you off the swings was

nice?

Nice or not, you're definitely going to get a good grade in your science

presentation.

Look, it's Rebecca Harper, long time no see. Hi, Alondra. How's it going?

Excellent. Hi, Michael Davies. Here's your masterpiece.

It's a wind turbine.

The prototype is too slow, so I used my hair elastics to give it a little zip.

Um... Excellent. I know. Guess what? I started a noon hour club. Geeks for

Greeks. You study Greek myth.

And the word geeks is actually in the club's title?

I'm sure Michael Davies would love to join.

Sounds like... Fun.

And, uh, nice job on the assignment.

Thanks, Michael Davies. Wait till Mr. McDean sees this. We'll get an A++ for

sure.

Bye, Rebecca Harper.

Well, my little Greek geek, looks like you've got yourself a girlfriend.

You're Wilder's best friend. Have you ever seen him act differently?

It's Wilder.

All he does is act differently.

Look, he's not that complicated.

Give him a juicy sandwich, a comic book, and a bib, and he's good to go.

Any problem is all in your head.

Let's test your theory, shall we?

Hey, Walder, did you get the Water Factory tickets yet?

Yes. Yes, I did.

Someone told me there'd be a rocking concert there.

Was it you, Eric?

Uh, it might have been.

It was me.

I told you yesterday at the blurb.

Hmm.

Maybe it was you, Derek. Sounds like something I'd say.

It wasn't Derek. It was me.

In that case, I appreciate you passing on the information, Amanda.

Hey, guy. Am I going to see you at the library for English assignment?

Yeah, you bet.

Catch you on the flip side. Flip you when I get there, buddy.

Okay, that was... Humiliating?

Boys, don't... ignore me. They camp out on my lawn hoping to catch a glimpse of

me as I ride my pony.

That story makes me embarrassed to be a boy.

While they're just having an off day, don't worry about it.

And I know you. Don't go concoct some wacky, elaborate scheme.

It'll just make it worse.

You're right. Totally.

Tutorial!

Hello, Daddy's assistant.

I need you to concoct a wacky and elaborate scheme to get a boy's

talk to you about Crush Party Ice.

You know, hard rapping, bad dancing, globetrotting Crush Party Ice.

Oh, her. I didn't think you'd read that.

That's the thing about the internet. Anyone can read it.

Like head office.

Come on.

You think they've ever heard of the internet? They've got... Hey, yo.

Buzz Boss Man back on the line here. Where's our music man?

Noah's right here, sir.

I checked...

Actually, sir, I didn't... We've got to be first with this femwrapper. It's a go

-deal for a live webcast tomorrow in the p .m. Hey -o!

A live webcast?

Hey -o!

Rebecca can't rap. She can't dance. Do you expect her to do both at the same

time? DJ, you've got to tell the boss it was a joke.

The last person that played a joke on him ended up working for SeamBuzz and

Arzuka. If I were you, I would go get your girlfriend some platinum grills.

Platinum what?

Girl.

Hey, I made it through my presentation with Yolanda. That's great. I knew you'd

have fun working with her.

Yeah. Her idea of fun is reciting the periodic table with a British accent.

Aluminium. Pip -pip cheerio.

Anyway, it's over. I'm safe at work.

Yolanda, free zone.

Michael Davies, guess what?

Sure he's on a coffee break?

What? No. Mr. McDean loves your presentation so much.

He's taking us to the National Science Fair. But Mr. McDane hates traveling.

He only leaves his house to teach him by mayonnaise.

Excellent. Well, he's taking us to Nationals next week. So pack your bags.

going to be the trip of a lifetime.

Ah!

Ah! The remote card.

Ah! Ah!

You could send me to a film festival in Egypt.

I can interview throat singers in Nunavut.

Michael, you are not... going to froth but in length avoid the National Science

Fair. You should be thrilled to have an eager partner like Yolanda.

DJ, I'll go anywhere!

No, Michael.

You don't seem to get how special Yolanda really is.

Sure, she might be awkward now, but wait a few years. She'll probably be a

knockout. A few years?

Do I look like a wait -and -see kind of guy?

Michael, romance can surprise you. You never know who you might fall for.

Yolanda's waiting.

Apparently for the last nine years.

That's when you'll hear me knocking, knocking at your door.

Whoa, that's when you'll hear me knocking, knocking at your door.

Oh, I am so, so bad at this.

I should never perform anywhere in front of anyone.

Are you kidding me? That was gold, R. 24 karat. You know what's even more

valuable than gold?

Not spreading lies on the internet?

That was a good one. You really got me. But the answer I was looking for is

platinum.

Aw, our first guilt gift. We really are a couple.

Just what I wanted.

Shiny buck teeth.

Okay, here's the thing. The boss man read your online profile and he thought

was real. He wants a concert.

You gotta perform as Crush Party Eyes.

Live. Tomorrow.

Not gonna happen.

What? Why not?

Because whenever you do something outrageous, I'm always the one who has

it. But that's why we make such a great couple.

This is one mess you're gonna have to deal with yourself.

But if you don't do it, the boss man's gonna send me to the sales pole.

Then you better buy yourself some long underwear.

Brr.

But penguins scare me.

Rebecca, I'll show you they're creepy.

So I'm in the backyard acting out the final scene from last night's Pizza

Patrol, and it took me an hour to get all the mozzarella out of my hair.

Check it. What?

What is it?

What up, skater boys?

Got my board taped up and a hair -friendly helmet. Who's up for some half

action after school?

Aw, Strack.

Daddy's assistant built a skate park for us. It'll be ollie -ollie all the time.

Give me a pound, doggie.

We don't have to do what she says.

We could catch a live movie, or I could tell more bicycle jokes. Anyway, we

gotta go.

Guess what, Michael Davies? We're putting the finalists up in a hotel.

For sure we'll be on the same floor.

Mini soaps, chocolates on the pillow, an ice machine. Just think, we can have

all the ice we want.

You know, you've done all the work on this thing.

Maybe you should just go on your own.

No, no, no.

We're a team, Michael Davies.

Um, the science fair is also the same weekend as my mom's birthday.

Nope, that was last month. I met my dad.

He hates when people make a fuss. My uncle's theater's wedding.

Runaway bride.

Now, we're going to win this thing. So take off my hair elastics and let's see

this baby hit Mach 3.

You totally shredded the pipe on your sled.

We got to catch air again sometime.

I'm too tired.

Too tired.

Just like the bike joke.

Hey, what is the girl going to do around here to get a smoothie?

Wow, man. Why are you so quiet? You cool?

No, I'm not cool.

I'm totally bummed.

What are you trying to prove, Amanda? If you don't like who I am, you don't have

to mock me in front of my friends.

Want to go to a live movie with me?

They're called plays.

Plays, plays, plays! And no!

None of you are the last dude on Earth.

What if I was second last and the other guy had a girlfriend?

Wait there and I'll get back to you.

rotor shaft, electric generator, hair elastics, and miniature Michael Davies

Yolanda Farquhar enjoying the beautiful windy day.

You have a mini Michael in the bow tie I'm wearing now?

Well, it is Wednesday.

Don't you think you pay a bit too much attention to the details?

Michael Davies likes us all about the details because if you look closely

enough, you'll see the beauty in anything.

Ow! What was that for?

Take a look.

That's my nose hair?

It's... Beautiful.

Guess what?

This is a science lab, not a kissing lab. What's wrong with you?

Probably could have handled that better.

Hey. or I guess you're ignoring all my calls.

Anyway, I'll write you.

Penguins, don't get me first.

Hey, Teen Buzz fans, guess you're ready for some crushed party ice, some icy

crush -up rappery goodness.

But instead of crushed party ice, it's time for crushed dreams, broken hearts,

shattered souls, ruined hope.

So if you're watching, boss man, I'll send you a postcard from Antarctica

because, um... Yo, yo!

to do it with my new song, My Bloke is a Joke.

Oh, my bloke is a joke. He's not like regular folk. He likes to shuffle and

tease and ignore all my pleas. I said I won't lend a hand, but in tears I can't

stand. Oh, yeah.

My name is Crush Party Ice.

Oh, yeah.

And I know how to play nice. Stay cool.

What are you doing?

Updating my status on Gleebook.

Wilder is a sad and lonely guy.

Because a man has destroyed him in front of his people.

And by people, I mean Eric and Derek.

My dudes.

But they're people too, you know.

I'm confused.

First of all, how do you have 8 ,732 Gleebook friends?

And second of all, I didn't destroy you. I worked my derriere off just trying to

fit in with you.

Fit in?

Yes! You were ignoring me. I thought if I acted like a skater girl, you'd be

nice.

Whoa!

This is my mind.

What's so mind -blowing?

I didn't think you wanted us to be friends in public.

Is that what you thought?

Duh, I just said that.

But why did you say it?

Because you're Amanda Pierce and I'm me.

I thought I was doing you a favor.

Because everything you have is classy.

From your toenail polish to that kajillion dollar haircut.

If people saw that we were friends, you'd lose some of your classy.

That's why, outside of Buzz, I didn't think you wanted to be my friend.

I don't.

Curse me and my noble intentions.

You know, Wilder, I want you to be my friend.

With potential.

What are you doing?

I'm updating my glee book status.

Wilder is psyched that Amanda says he's her friend with potential.

Not so fast.

Maybe we don't have to tell all your friends.

Can I at least tell Eric and Eric?

Sure. I have a feeling they're still waiting down at the blurb.

I thought I might find you here.

Yes, this was our table.

It wasn't really... Never mind.

I wanted to apologize for before.

I mean, I didn't think you would... So, I kind of freaked out.

Yeah, I got that part.

That's what I say from my perspective.

I'm petty and shallow.

I care about image and...

Reputation and image.

You dress funny, collect banana labels, and have a frog.

I'm sorry.

That's too superficial.

Thank you, Michael Davies.

What for?

For ending a nine -year crush.

Sure, I might have weird habits and quirky clothes, but one day I'll find a

who loves those things and loves me just as I am.

And in the meantime, Yolanda Farquhar has zoomed out to see the bigger

and she is way too good for Michael Davies.

I'm going to the Nationals alone, and I'm going to win.

Dude, who's the hottie?

Her name is Yolanda Farquhar.

You just made the biggest mistake of my life.

I didn't think you had it in you.

Thanks for bailing me out.

I didn't do it for you. I did it for me.

If anyone is going to make your life miserable, it's going to be me and not a

parcel of penguins.

Like I'm scared of anyone who'd say a parcel of penguins.

That's what it's called.

Check it out on Gleepedia.

Oh, and while you're there, you might want to read the buzz page.

Turns out Noah Jackson performs weekends at kids' parties.

He's kicky the kick -me -clown.

Fancy that.

Kick -me -clown?

Bossman's online, too.

His son turns five this weekend.

Apparently, he likes to kick things.

Go ahead, sir.

If it isn't my little platinum -toothed rap star.

Hey, Mr. Jackson, Clown Man, Kiki, let's talk deets for my boy's birthday bash.

Do you, uh, provide your own shin pads?

He's got ten friends, and, uh, they all like to kick.

Hey -o!

You're not really gonna make me do this.

Like regular folks, he likes to chuckle and tease and ignore all my pleas. I

said I won't lend a hand because of tears I can't stand.

Oh, yeah.

My name is Crush Party Ice.

Oh, yeah.

And I know how to play nice.

Stay cool. Stay, stay, stay cool.