Original subtitles

Guys, go.

The Halloween dance starts in half an hour.

Don't rush the bride. Do you know how long it takes a girl to put her bolts

It's Dracula and a boring dude.

No, I'm the famous author of Dracula, Bram Stoker.

Ah, a boring dude.

Ta -da!

I'm the ultimate fashion crime, get it?

That's not what you told my dad when he asked to borrow his clothes.

You all look spooktacular.

There's just one thing left to do before the dance.

Shuck your blood.

Pretty scary, huh?

I'm just not getting that tingly feeling in the back of my neck.

Yeah, we don't scare that easy.

Thank you.

Light switches are all off. Computers are unplugged. All the food in the

is eaten.

Safety first.

It'll only take a few minutes to flip the breaker and get the power back on.

Shepard, I just asked you to bring a flashlight.

Anytime you combine the words Halloween and basement, expect me to come extra

prepared. With a dinky garlic necklace? You don't know what's down there,

Amanda.

Someone watched too many horror movies as a kid. Speaking of which, I do not

want any ghost stories while I'm gone. I don't want to come back up to a room

full of scaredy cats.

Bah!

Here's the deal.

Whoever tells the scariest story is the master of horror.

What do we get? The pride of knowing you've terrified your fellow

Good enough for me?

I'll start.

I've got a hunch.

You're going to love my story.

Once upon a time, there was a wilder.

Okay, name the planet.

Mercury, Venus, Earth, Zorbat, Mars. For the last time, Wilder, the fourth

planet from the sun is not Zorbat.

Really? Let me check my notes.

Mercury, Venus, Earth.

Curse me and my wraparound writing.

I'm going down to the blurb. When I get back, I want you to have your notes

copied on paper.

I'm done.

I wouldn't need a photocopier if I had another Wilder to read the other side of

my arm.

Wilder, I need your article.

And another Wilder to type up my article.

No drinks by the photocopier.

And another Wilder to hold my double bubble tea before I...

We're the gaming guy. Yep. Also known as the master of extreme. The gossipy

guru. Or the dude who eats great sandwiches.

Sweet, man.

Sweeter. Now I got double the dude.

I can't find the photocopy of my arm.

Clone, lift up your right arm.

That's better.

Mercury, Venus.

All nine planets committed to the dome.

And Zorbot is not.

Wilder, where are you?

In here, Amanda.

Amanda? We like her.

There you are.

Yep, just me, all by myself, one person.

Are you studying?

You better be, or I'll call the roller rink and cancel our reservation.

Whoa, don't worry, we'll study. I mean, I'll study.

Okay, you have half an hour to learn those planets.

We love hanging with Amanda.

Dude, it's like you can read my mind.

Dude, that's because we have the same brain. What was ever in your dome before

came out of the photocopier is now in my dome, too.

Handy.

Let's hope the dome work's better for you. I mostly use it for burrito

You heard the lady. Get studying.

Homework? But we hate homework.

You don't get this.

You're the clone.

You get to do all the unfun stuff, so I get to do all the fun stuff.

Wait, you forgot the pepper.

Thanks, Tone Wilder.

I usually don't feel like this unless I'm in my jammies.

Or someone put sleeping powder on my, uh, sandwich.

Wait!

You're trying to take me out of the picture and get control of my life!

Why I oughta...

Air

delivery to the middle of nowhere.

Sayonara.

It's been five minutes. There's no way you're done studying.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sandwiches are tasty, and I like you.

I've inspired hostile takeovers, fashion trends, and pet envy, but never poetry.

Wilder, I moved.

Don't do it, Amanda. He's an evil clone.

work this out because I do not double date.

Time to go back to Codeland.

I'm not going anywhere. You are.

Amanda, pull the lever.

No, Amanda, I'm real wilder. No, Amanda, I'm real wilder. Stop copying me. Stop

copying me.

I can't tell you guys apart.

You have the same hair, same eyes, same wrestling noises.

No, wait.

What did you do to my dress tonight at the Glimmers?

move I created? The Wild's window.

Although I actually invented it, you were the person who tried to exploit it.

What's the fourth planet from the sun?

Zorbat. Mars.

I knew it.

Only my wilds already answered Zorbat.

I'm so glad you didn't study the planets.

Actually, Wilder did study. How do you think he knew the right answer?

Two Wilders fighting over me. It had a few logic flaws, like how did clone

Wilder suddenly get the sleeping powder?

I'm more interested in where Wilder suddenly got that sandwich.

Lunchbox Notre Dame.

My turn. Check this out.

Michael Davies scrutinizes his reflection.

Right before the Kelly Clarkson interview.

We here at Entertainment Wow want to remind everyone that tonight is a full

moon. Any werewolves among us will reveal their true form.

Talk about a hairy situation.

Good night, everyone.

I can't interview Kelly Clarkson looking like this.

Yeah, the suit is a little flashy. The suit is perfect. Problem is my face.

Nap. Even I wasn't going to go there. But now that you mention it, your

are crooked.

A little support here. I have my first face -to -face interview with the most

wonderful woman in music.

And I look like a kid.

I need facial hair, not much.

Just an upper lip caterpillar.

Try this.

From bear to hare, guaranteed to make you a man in two minutes or less.

Am I supposed to trust something that comes out of your prank pack?

Got a better idea, baby face?

These things are crooked. A little bit.

One spoonful for boy band peach fuzz.

Two spoonfuls for firefighter manly stubble.

Three spoonfuls for lumberjack chest hair.

No need to overdo it.

Come on here. Michael Davies is ready for his first shaving kit.

Gets my hopes up just so he can let me down.

supposed to drink the whole bottle i didn't i took two spoonfuls for manly

stubble instead i got hairy sasquatch may cause itchiness

drowsiness shedding do not drink on a full moon or you'll turn into a

werewolf at least

tonight's the night all werewolves transform you'll fit in you lose the bow

Losing the bow tie.

You know, when your eyebrows get bushy, they look even more crooked.

Here.

My mom made this for me, but you can have it if you want.

Needs more meat.

I'll let my mom know.

Oh, you don't mean the sandwich.

God, I have a werewolf cure.

Sneezing powder, hair removal cream, too late for that.

Silver bullet candy.

For the record, that was just a whoopee cushion.

Oh, oh, and oh, again.

Bad aftertaste.

I'm me again.

Smooth, hairless me.

It's time to interview Kelly Clarkson.

You scared me, buddy.

Thank goodness that's over.

I'm right out of silver bullets.

Clarkson? Please.

That would never happen.

For me, the best horror stories have to be based on truth.

One day, the most beautiful girl at Buzz was watching a movie on her laptop.

Well, if I guess, that's the circle.

Yeah, so?

Anyone who watches that video gets a phone call right afterwards delivering

worst news ever.

My cousin's best friend's piano teacher watched it, and right after, her phone

rang. It was her best student saying she'd broken her pinky.

Even I believe in it, and usually I'm not that gullible.

Whatever. It's just a movie.

See? No phone call.

and she wants me to hand out towels?

Lame. Next.

My story will have you shaking in your boots. Already lame. Next.

Just listen.

It was a day like any other.

Just remember, pick your spot, swing easy, and fast dance.

Pick my spot, got it, swing easy.

You might... not want to practice in front of a billion dollar high def TV.

This came for you.

Oh, my Justin Morneau bobble head.

Bobble, bobble, bobble.

In real life, that thing won't even be able to stand up, let alone play with a

head that huge.

Creepy.

Leave me alone.

I'll get you.

Fine. I just want the bubble wrap. I'm going to give it to Wilder so he stops

playing with my CDs.

Great idea.

Dude, you're the best!

Wait a minute.

Do not remove Justin's MVP medallion or you will have bad luck.

Who buys the cursed bobblehead?

I'm sure it's just a joke. Besides, Justin's too cute to be cursed.

Popping bubbles makes me thirsty.

Smoothie?

Sure, but just for a minute. I have to work late.

Toy bling is all the rage.

Look fantastic.

Where's the camera? I need to update my Buzz profile picture.

All right, Justin, it's just you and me. So show me some of that MVP

inspiration.

Where'd Bobblehead Justin go?

Noah, keep your prankster hands off my Justin doll.

This isn't funny, Noah. I know you're hiding in here somewhere.

We need a picture, not a billionaires.

Play ball.

Why did I run into a room without an exit?

D -Ride 1.

D -Ride 2.

Three, you're out.

You're about to get jelly bean.

Use the swing, Rebecca.

Use the swing.

By the way, thanks for being my number one fan.

Pick my spot.

Swing easy.

Play ball.

Now that's a grand slam.

The end.

This actually looks better on him than me.

Horror story rule number one. No happy endings.

Listen and learn, R.

It was a quiet night at headquarters.

Almost too quiet.

Hello, Ghostbusters Incorporated. We send your paranormal pet packing.

Sorry, wrong number.

Business is almost as slow as Wilder. I mean, how long does it take to fix one

little spirit detector?

Unless there's paranormal activity behind me.

Nope, thing's still broken.

How am I going to stop making scary faces? She's confusing it.

Hello, Ghostbusters Incorporated. Please send your paranormal pest packing.

There's a Class G paranormal disturbance at Ernie C. High.

What's Class G again?

Oh, don't tell me.

Goldfish.

No, no, no, no, no.

Goulash.

Oh, yeah. Garden gnomes.

Wilder, we are not the garden gnome blasters. We're the ghost blasters.

Oh, ghosts.

I had this thing set to detect girls.

Whoops.

Be careful.

It sounds like a big one.

No job is too big for the ghost blasters.

Looks like you're buried in barbecue sauce because you're a chicken.

I'm not. I'm just busy.

Busy being a chicken.

Chicken!

Here

goes

D, goes D, goes D. You really think that's wise?

We blast divided.

that I could eat in peace for once.

And I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for you muddling kids.

It would have been easier to hang a do not disturb sign.

Guys, I'm detecting high levels of paranormal activity.

That thing never works. But the wind.

Woo.

Shepard just probably left the door open.

Rebecca Harper.

Debate team captain 1907.

Weird. That Rebecca Harper looks just like our Rebecca Harper.

Can't be. This Rebecca Harper must be over 100 years old. Or dead.

But she does have the same dimples. And the same beauty marks. And the same

name. Yes!

It is our Rebecca Harper!

Who's the chicken now?

And

no

one ever saw the Ghost Blast. again.

Now I got that tingling feeling at the back of my neck.

I have to admit, that was pretty scary.

Guys?

But that's not possible. The power's off.

It's a class G paranormal disturbance.

Gotcha! You can turn the lights on. The power's back.

By far, DJ and Mr. S are the masters of horror.

Stay with me.

DJ and Mr. S are the masters of horror.

Now let's get to the dance so I can break out my monster match.

Aren't you done scaring us?