All language subtitles for The Latest Buzz s01e10 The Live Issue

I shouldn't like this show, but I do.

Welcome to Entertainment Wow, your hot
spot for celebrity gossip.

What's not to like about red carpet trip
-ups, eyelash extensions, and celebrity

pets?

It's time for E -Wow's temper tantrum of
the day.

There's a tantrum a day? Where do these
people come from?

Apparently from the elevator.

Is she going to breathe?

You need a less frightening elevator.

What's wrong?

The fashion show.

I was there.

You'll see.

Today's temper tantrum, fashion designer
Figarucci. He's so out, he's inside

out. In fact, his collection today was
declared D .O .A.

Disgusting on arrival.

Get it off me. Get it off me. I never
want to see it again.

Let me guess. Bad day for a Figarucci
fan?

I can't wait to get out and hang out
with my friends. Find out what's new.

stress me on who.

And who's better with who.

It's a whole new thing.

In the pages of my...

Ready, waiting, practically bored.

We've got TV star Michael DiCenzo. It'll
be great for you in the magazine.

Do you need any help?

Absolutely not.

Putting it out there in case you could
use a partner.

Thanks.

But I work better alone.

Time to go gloat to my peers.

Ooh, is that a new shirt?

great color on you.

Could I? No.

What? You don't even know what I was
going to ask.

Sadly, I do.

Great color on you. Can I interview
Michael DeCenzo with you?

Actually, he codes by Mike.

I hope you should have remembered that
when I interview him.

Alone.

But this is Team Buzz's first live
webcast ever.

Don't you need an assistant?

Let me think.

No.

Hear me out.

How cool would it be for my column to
profile someone who's a student and a

star? Can I say no yet?

I don't think you're giving this your
full attention.

Rebecca, you only want this because
you're a Michael DeCenzo super fan. I am

not. You post fan fiction on your blog.

Another day, another DeCenzo.

Rebecca, this is my thing.

but I know so much about him. Like, he
speaks Italian, he's read all the Harry

Potter books four times, and he has the
cutest little eyebrows.

Except the non -fan.

Rebecca, Rebecca, Rebecca.

Let's be realistic.

My live webcast is globally,
historically important.

This is the reason they invented the
Internet.

I don't make the rules, Rebecca.

That's not what you said in the first
grade.

Oh, yeah.

Rule number one.

I make all the rules.

Remember rule number two?

Accept it and move on.

Back to my DeCenzo interview.

Note to self, find out who he is.

Amanda?

Dressed in stranger's clothes from The
Lost and Found?

No. Neck deep in a fashion don't.

It's not that big a deal.

I know you love Frangipani, but... It's
Figarochi. The man's name is Figarochi.

And he's all I've ever worn.

I remember how it all began.

As a baby, I would only wear designer
stuff.

My diapers were Figarochi Pooparochi.

I was accessorizing by the time I was
two.

Wow. I was still afraid of the vacuum.

Amanda Pierce is what she wears.

Do you know what this means?

Seriously, no idea.

I'm nothing.

Don't you think you're overreacting?

Overreacting? Where do you shop? Well,
there's this funky little outlet mall

in... Enough said.

You don't know what I'm going through.

Nobody does.

I have a feeling Fancy Panty does.

It's Figueroa Cheese!

Martian invasion 2060 is a joke. When
aliens visit our planet, it's going to

a lot friendlier than this. I can't
believe I'm going to ask this.

When who visits our what now?

Aliens. When they visit Earth, it's
going to happen.

I visit this site every day.

Aliens will contact Earth.

It's not a conspiracy.

Dot com. Well, as long as you're using
your time wisely.

My computer's hooked up to a satellite
that monitors space for alien life.

My computer's hooked to my printer.

A third of all teenagers believe in
aliens, Noah.

So two -thirds are normal?

Go ahead and mock me, but aliens are out
there. And they're coming this way. We

just don't know when.

Maybe we do.

Maybe we do.

Nothing I love more than an after -lunch
donut served with a steaming cup of

gossip.

Whoa! Fashion flop at two o 'clock?

It isn't a bland appearance.

What have you got on?

A no -name tattoo.

Why? Because you look hideous?

No, Beth.

None taken.

None taken?

You really are depressed.

Well, I happen to have something that
just might cheer you up.

Hearing about people worse off than me?

Exactly. So who do you want first?
Beauty Queen's pageant pratfall?

country singer's mullet transplant, or
poor little witch girl's fashion fiasco.

The third one, the third one.

Publishing heiress and current fashion
goat Amanda Pierce looked like a million

bucks. And it's super smart.

Just keep it up.

It couldn't be any more pathetic.

Do you have a little... Here?

Interview day.

Hair product.

Shirt.

Hot. Smile.

Straight from my heart.

The rainstorm pours down at 4 o 'clock.
The rainstorm pours down at 4 o 'clock!

Descends is in the building.

Stand up and look alive. The star is on
its way.

Entering room with just one of my many
flavors.

And who's this charming young lady?

I'm... That's my assistant, Rebecca.

She'll be happy to appoint your posse to
the kitchenette.

This way, posse.

Oh, and don't touch the fruit leathers.
They're mine.

Great outfit.

Well, you gotta look good for my
girlfriend, Madison.

And good you look.

I just wanted to ask you...

First, I'd like to dedicate this
interview to my girlfriend.

That's amore.

You speak Italian?

Sort of.

I'm learning between Harry Potter books.

How cool are you?

Hugably cool.

I gotta take this.

It's my boo.

Hey, honey buns.

That hug was for me. You don't even like
hugs.

It's called being professional?

I can't believe you used everything I
told you. You stole my interview. Did

But do you have any more Italian words
for me?

Yeah, but I'm too polite to use them.

Wilder, I think your computer's jammed
or something.

I'm trying to do a music review and all
I can hear is that.

Dude, they made contact. The aliens have
made contact.

No way.

So way.

Here, check it. There's even a message.

Dear human, we see you from light years
away.

Sadly, we also smell you.

Hurtful.

Prepare for further contact. Do not be
alarmed.

Do you know what this means?

They're going to dose you up with
intergalactic soap?

Their people they want to meet with me
fun people you take me seriously sure

this battle for credibility Bring on the

alien you're so out of touch Amanda

I

was thinking for today's webcast you
could

Are you still down about Vigarucci?

I thought he and I were in it for the
long haul.

Amanda, you're too young to be tied down
to one designer.

I know it doesn't seem like it now, but
it's for the best.

You're just saying that I was your exact
age when I fell in love with parachute

pants.

What happened? It was the best three
months of my life.

And then corduroy overall came along and
ruined everything.

It's your time now.

Experiment. Break out of your mold.

See new designers.

So soon?

You're Amanda Pierce.

The designers will be lining up to dress
you.

But he and I were so good together.

What are you wrong?

It's not you.

It's him.

Thanks, DJ. You sure are wise for a
woman in a sweater vest.

And we're live in 30 seconds.

Oh, it's my girlfriend again. Sending me
a good luck text.

Here's hoping you can read it in 15
seconds or less.

You are not for me?

Later?

I've been dumped.

By text?

In front of a kid with a boot?

Hey, Teen Buzz fans, we're coming at you
live from magazine headquarters with

our special guest, Michael DeCenzo.

He's not here right now, but we'll head
over to Buzz's own Rebecca

Harper. What?

I have to find Mike.

Not that he's lost or anything.

He's just answering your text questions.
So Rebecca here will entertain you in

so many words.

I need you out there and online.

Okay, I do have time to ask. What is
going on? You were right. Ever since I

broke up with Figaro Chief, other
designers are vooing me like mad.

Don't you think you're moving a little
bit fast here? You're the one who told

to see other designers. Not on the same
day.

Both Michaels are missing in action. Get
out there now.

Anyway, that's how I got the nickname
Rash Becca.

But... Hey, fab dudes and fierce...

to vote for your favorite Amanda Pierce
ensemble.

Gator Chick.

Cool Cowgirl.

Silas Señorita.

Both are already in.

Haley from Burnaby says, Who are you and
where's Michael Desenzo?

Michael DeCenzo in the fruit hat.

Okay, people, pay attention here. We're
working on me.

Now, where did you put the eye patch?

It's tough.

I know you two were together for a long
time.

Three weeks.

Who walks away from that kind of
commitment?

Not me.

Speaking of commitments, we kind of had
this webcast thing to do. I pour my

heart out, and all I get is, later,
Spelled with an eight.

I got dumped by a girl once.

Third grade, and I asked her if she
wanted to share my lunch with me.

She took it all and burped in my face.

Bad day for an egg and pickle sandwich.

Spare me the childhood memories.

Okay, this is way worse.

You know, whenever I'm sad, I sing songs
from Good Witch, Bad Witch.

Shall we?

Which witch should I be?

Which witch is really me?

Nice job.

Our first date was to Good Witch, Bad
Witch.

I need to be alone.

Note to self, read Rebecca's blog.

No way.

What, dude?

Breaking news story.

Air Force radar picked up a weird
communication signal. And they don't

it is.

The wild man does.

Come on home, boys.

Guys, I need somebody to replace Amanda.

What about DeCenzo? Still locked in my
office, which means Rebecca's back on

telling viewers.

How to make a compass using old leaves
and bear poop.

With the follow -up story, now that
you're lost and smelly.

Wilder, get on there and do your thing.

You got it, DJ.

This rock.

A webcast is the perfect way to tell the
world that aliens have made contact.

Or you could just talk gaming, like DJ
expects.

DJ wouldn't want me to sit on a story.

This is the happiest day of my life.
After the world hears this, no one will

ever doubt me again.

Wilder. There's something I gotta tell
you. Oh, man.

I bet I'll win the prize for galactic
peace.

Fame. Pizza.

Hotties.

And sad little Noah will get nothing
because he didn't believe aliens were

What'd you want again?

This came for you.

Awesome.

Yes, sir.

Micah says we'll be right back. I've...
I've got somebody bringing him to set

now.

Descenzo! Open up!

Descenzo! Go away!

Uh, we're sort of building anticipation
for his return.

Yes, sir.

I'll hurry up and bring him back out
here.

It sounds like they're talking at least.
I better go check on things.

Greetings, fellow humans.

These aliens have contacted me, and just
like you, they want to know all about

Desenzo. What?

Bendix from Planet Zorbat asks, what's
your favorite snack?

Cereal, hot cocoa, or moon rock?

I'm as baffled as you are.

Well, Bendix, if I know Mike Desenzo,
the answer is cereal.

Something fruity with a little fiber.

This is what the viewers pick, but I'm
not sure.

Now, remember, don't be afraid.

Aliens are friendly critters.

Ah! Oh!

Alien attack!

Alien attack!

We are all gonna die!

Give my skateboard to my mom!

Too shiny?

Are you hungry? I could slip something
under the door. I've got a whole array

flat foods.

So, how are things going?

Fine, fine.

Thanks to me. He's on the phone making
up with Madison.

Listen, Madison.

Nobody dumps Mike DiCenzo. Mike DiCenzo
dumps you.

It's a work in progress.

Hi, can you help me? Let me think.

No.

But I will help Mike DiCenzo.

Move out of the way. Superfan coming
through.

Go away, bowtie boy.

It's me. You know, the charming young
lady?

Oh, yeah.

I remember you.

Sure. Kind of a

rough day, huh?

Tell me about it.

I feel so alone and dumped.

What are you talking about? You have a
bunch of friends in the kitchen.

Oh, and by the way, they ate all my
cabbage rolls.

They're not my friends. They're my
entourage, and I hired them.

My real friends are just guys like me,
except... With girlfriend.

I am such a fraud.

You're not a fraud.

You're a really sweet guy.

You don't know the real me. You only
know the character I play on TV.

Well, I kind of do.

You once responded to my fan mail.

That seemed super sweet.

That's what actors do.

It was two pages handwritten. You told
me about yourself, your family, and more

importantly, you asked about my life.

It was like you were my biggest fan.

I'm a super nice guy. And a guy like
that shouldn't be with a girl who texts

them.

You are so right.

I mean, she so wasn't my type anyway.
She actually thought my last name was

Dementia.

Man, they should have sent you in a long
time ago.

I had to cover for the webcast.

Our star went missing.

What'd you do?

I did the cry of the loon. It's my
favorite.

It's like good improv.

Of course the stencil's in on it.

That's why he's a genius.

What are you so mad about? I mean, you
got the message out, didn't you?

I'm mad because you made me a
laughingstock at aliens will contact

nonconspiracy .com.

Oh, trust me, they're not the only ones
laughing.

You too? Calm down.

You're just mad because you won't win
biggest dork in the galaxy.

It's prize for galactic peace.

And you.

clumping around like a hobo from space.

FYI, this is a designer original.

None of them have already seen it on
Bendix.

Bendix isn't real.

I would like to take the opportunity to
remind you all that we are still alive.

Which witch should I be? Which witch is
really me?

Am I bad? Am I good? Am I true? Or just
misunderstood?

Want to wait this one out for a bit?

That's right, sir.

The hits for the site were through the
roof.

Yes, no one's more surprised than I am.

Okay, bye now.

Oh, you found a new designer. I told you
it would happen.

No, I'm back with Figuerochi.

Oh.

Yeah, I always liked him.

But maybe things will be different this
time.

Just curious.

What changed your mind?

I decided that Figuerochi was my fashion
soulmate.

That? And he was just declared back in.

Ugh. I give them six months.