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00:00:41,020 --> 00:00:43,100
This is the theme to Gary's show.
2
00:00:43,340 --> 00:00:48,340
The theme to Gary's show. Gary called me
up and asked if I would write his theme
3
00:00:48,340 --> 00:00:52,420
song. I'm almost halfway finished. How
do you like it so far?
4
00:00:52,830 --> 00:00:54,870
How do you like the theme to Gary's
show?
5
00:00:56,130 --> 00:01:00,690
This is the theme to Gary's show, the
opening theme to Gary's show. This is
6
00:01:00,690 --> 00:01:03,670
music that you hear as you watch the
credits.
7
00:01:04,030 --> 00:01:09,010
We're almost to the part of where I
start to whistle. Then we'll watch the
8
00:01:09,010 --> 00:01:10,010
Shandling show.
9
00:01:14,850 --> 00:01:17,390
This was the theme to Gary Shandling's
show.
10
00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:41,660
This is the theme to Gary's show. The
theme to Gary's show. Gary called me up
11
00:02:41,660 --> 00:02:43,920
and asked if I would write a theme song.
12
00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:48,820
I'm almost halfway finished. How do you
like it so far? How do you like the
13
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:50,040
theme to Gary's show?
14
00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:55,840
This is the theme to Gary's show. The
opening theme to Gary's show. This is
15
00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:58,800
music that you hear as you watch the
credits.
16
00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:04,140
We're almost to the part of where I
start to whistle. Then we'll watch his
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00:03:04,140 --> 00:03:05,140
Stanley show.
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00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:12,560
This was the theme to Gary Shandling's
show.
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Gary! Are you sure he's not here?
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00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:34,300
Listen, Leonard.
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I don't know. I'm getting worried. They
played the theme twice.
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00:03:40,250 --> 00:03:41,650
It is a bit worrisome.
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Shoo, fly, don't bother me. Shoo, fly,
don't bother me. Shoo, fly, don't
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00:03:56,930 --> 00:03:59,710
bother... Nancy, now, don't panic.
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00:04:00,130 --> 00:04:04,170
Gary's just a little late, I'm sure.
Believe me, everything's going to be
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00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:12,600
There is a tavern in the town, in the
town. And there my dear love sits her
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00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:13,860
down, sits her down.
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Oh,
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hey. Hi, Nance. Have you seen Baba?
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I mean, he was supposed to meet me for
lunch. No, we haven't seen him. We've
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been looking for him ourselves.
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I don't know. Well, that's just not like
him at all.
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Yeah.
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Hey, wait a minute. It's Tuesday.
35
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Yeah.
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Benedict, it's Nancy Bancroft. Yeah,
fine, thanks. Is Gary still there?
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Class.
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Dance. Dance. Dance. Dance. Dance.
39
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Could we please stop dancing? It's
Gary's friend on the phone.
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No?
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Nancy, Gary never showed up for tap
class today. I'm worried.
42
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He isn't mad at me, is he?
43
00:05:01,330 --> 00:05:02,690
Oh, don't be silly, Benedict.
44
00:05:03,030 --> 00:05:04,070
Gary thinks I'm silly?
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Don't start, Benedict.
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Yeah, thanks very much. Bye -bye.
47
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Well, he's not there.
48
00:05:10,850 --> 00:05:11,850
Oh, man.
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00:05:12,790 --> 00:05:16,950
You can call it mother's intuition if
you want to, but I have this feeling
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something terrible has happened.
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00:05:20,950 --> 00:05:22,250
Hey, everybody. What's doing?
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Oh, hi, you guys. Have you seen Gary?
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00:05:24,710 --> 00:05:28,350
No. Isn't he here? The three of us were
going to shoot some hoops. Yeah, and he
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said that he would treat us to some ice
cream if we made any.
55
00:05:33,239 --> 00:05:34,880
We can't find Bubba.
56
00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:38,120
What? Yeah, no one has any idea where he
is.
57
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Hey, I think I see his kite.
58
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Is it the box kite with the red tail?
59
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Yeah, yeah, that's the one.
60
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Oh, I should have known. I should have
known he forgets everything when he
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that kite.
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He just loves the wind in his hair and
the sun in his face. Oh, and the
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grass in his toes.
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00:05:58,260 --> 00:05:59,260
Hey, guys.
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Well, the workmen got deported before
they could finish the found.
66
00:06:11,340 --> 00:06:12,580
It's the words of Uncle Gary.
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Hey, Leonard, is it my imagination or
does it look like that kite is sailing
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away? Baba, I know you're hiding from
me. Now, come out of there. Oh, my God.
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00:06:20,340 --> 00:06:21,340
He's down.
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just tuning in, Gary Shanling was
discovered by friends to have fallen
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23 -foot hole in the quad area of his
Sherman Oaks home. And it is yet to be
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determined whether or not the 38 -year
-old comic is still alive.
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Officer, look, we've got to get all
these people back and clear this area.
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them home. We need the whole area to
work. Oh, no. No, no, I am not leaving.
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That's my son down there. Ruth, Ruth,
it's a good idea. The rescue squad is
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asking that everyone move away from the
site so that they can get on with the
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arduous task of removing the fallen 38
-year -old.
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00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:10,220
Hurry up with that drill, okay? This
guy's not moving. Now, let's go.
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Okay, here we are.
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Everything's going to be all right,
Ruth.
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the possibility of it caving in on him.
We'll keep you updated as the situation
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warrants. Now back to our movie, already
in progress.
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I know they're doing everything they
possibly
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can. And Bubba's going to be just fine.
That's exactly
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what he's going to be fine.
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Maybe something good will come out of
this.
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That's exactly what might come out of
all this. Some good.
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What
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good
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could come out of Uncle Gary falling
down a hole? Oh, my God.
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00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:23,000
He's too young. He's too young. He
doesn't understand the rabbit. He's too
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young. He's too young.
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Grant is too young.
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Of course he is.
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But he is certainly growing up to be a
very handsome young man. Oh, he's a good
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-looking guy, Grant. Good boy.
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Much like me when I was a lad.
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Back in Sherman Oaks, where the rescue
squad is just about ready to lower our
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camera, which will answer the question,
did Gary Shandling, the 38 -year -old
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comic, survive his tragic plunge down
this 23 -foot hole?
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To try to speak to her son
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Where am I, Mom?
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You're in a hole, dear.
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Oh, that's what I was afraid of.
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Everybody's here.
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00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:23,440
Hi, Gary!
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The question still remains, how could a
guy that old not see
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a hole that big?
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00:10:35,940 --> 00:10:38,220
Is that Diana Lewis up there?
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00:10:38,580 --> 00:10:39,359
What, dear?
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00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:40,360
Is that Diana Lewis?
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00:10:45,230 --> 00:10:47,050
Yeah, then tell her not to make fun of
me.
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00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:55,150
Hi, you guys. I'm really... You guys who
came to see the show.
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I'm really sorry. I missed the monologue
and... Why are the legs behind my back
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right now?
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That's right. If I ever get out of here,
you won't be able to tell if I'm coming
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or going.
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Good thing I haven't lost my sense of
humor.
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Anyway, sorry I missed the monologue.
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00:11:18,580 --> 00:11:21,480
I missed half -claps.
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00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:27,120
And, you know, Benedict would be really
proud of me now that I'm finally able to
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get the fifth position here.
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00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:32,000
Yo, Jack!
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You hit a gas pipe!
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Okay, look!
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Everybody, clear the areas and back to
the top of the slide!
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00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:41,460
I smell gas.
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00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:43,960
I smell...
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You know, it's a methane. It's
definitely a methane.
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00:11:48,950 --> 00:11:50,590
No, no, it's not a propane.
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00:11:51,450 --> 00:11:56,030
I know gas, and this is definitely a
nice methane, because methane's a little
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fruitier.
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00:11:58,070 --> 00:12:00,510
Not presumptuous, yet very, very
naughty.
134
00:12:01,390 --> 00:12:04,810
Oh, boy, not like... It's a nice Napa
Valley gas.
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00:12:05,310 --> 00:12:09,290
Not like one of those cheap French gases
they use to make crepes.
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00:12:13,580 --> 00:12:17,740
Of the essence, they must get Shanley
out of the hole before the gas has any
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00:12:17,740 --> 00:12:19,780
effect on the 38 -year -old Comet.
138
00:12:21,620 --> 00:12:25,480
Oh, man, I'm really starting to feel
lightheaded.
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00:12:26,100 --> 00:12:28,780
My whole body's starting to feel
lightheaded.
140
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:32,200
It's starting to feel like the 60s down
here.
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00:12:34,580 --> 00:12:41,180
Oh, I hope I pass out before I say, hmm,
this gas goes good with fish.
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00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,440
Oh, man, where am I?
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00:13:01,020 --> 00:13:02,320
Hello, Gary.
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Welcome to hell.
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00:13:05,260 --> 00:13:08,900
Hell? Oh, they must have found my naked
playing cards.
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00:13:18,540 --> 00:13:21,880
this with all the comedians when they
first get here. You should have seen the
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00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:23,680
expression on Bennett Cerf's face.
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00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:28,620
You see, I'm here to welcome you to
heaven. Oh, heaven.
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It's heaven.
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00:13:30,580 --> 00:13:32,360
Oh, gee.
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I thought heaven would look more
realistic.
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Not like Jimmy Swaggart's house.
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00:13:38,100 --> 00:13:40,440
Is Grandpa here? No, he's at the track.
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Great grace today.
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Ruffian against man o' war.
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Oh, gee, there must be a dead heat joke
in there somewhere, huh, Grandma?
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That's why you're here.
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Oh, what's this stage over here? Oh,
well, that's where your life flashes
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00:13:57,260 --> 00:13:58,260
your eyes.
160
00:13:58,320 --> 00:13:59,580
You're kidding. Mm -hmm.
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00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:02,200
Well, who are all these people?
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00:14:02,680 --> 00:14:05,140
Critics. They make the final judgment.
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00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:12,980
Oh, no, just what I was afraid of. I'm
as good as dead, really, because see
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00:14:12,980 --> 00:14:13,980
guy in the white hair?
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00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:16,820
Really wrecked me over the cold one
night in Cleveland.
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Push, Mrs. Shandling, push.
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I remember those words. That's my bird.
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00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:29,740
Come on, Mrs. Shandling, push.
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I won't give him up. He is mine.
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00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:36,300
Please. Ten and a half months is more
than enough time.
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00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:39,720
I will never give him up, so you just go
away and leave us alone.
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00:14:42,140 --> 00:14:45,230
Thank goodness they got a court order.
to get me out of there. Otherwise, it
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00:14:45,230 --> 00:14:46,670
would have had to send in the SWAT team.
174
00:14:48,350 --> 00:14:55,070
The main export of Guatemala is bananas.
Oh, I remember this. Here comes my
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00:14:55,070 --> 00:14:56,070
first joke.
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00:14:56,270 --> 00:15:01,030
And speaking of bananas, have you ever
stolen one from a grocery store?
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00:15:01,710 --> 00:15:02,710
It's easy.
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00:15:02,890 --> 00:15:04,130
Stick it in your pants.
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00:15:04,690 --> 00:15:09,370
And what are they going to do? Stop you
and ask, is that a banana in your pants?
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00:15:10,130 --> 00:15:13,210
And if they do, just say, thank you.
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00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:34,920
That's when you lost your virginity to
that Norwegian waitress.
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00:15:35,180 --> 00:15:37,680
Oh, that's right. I called you
afterward.
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Oh, man, I didn't know I was going to
have to take your full weight.
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Oh, that was a beautiful, beautiful
moment that
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I'll never forget.
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Oh, and this happened today.
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Here I am flying my kite.
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Isn't it a pretty sight?
189
00:16:02,030 --> 00:16:04,330
Oh, on the ground, look at that.
190
00:16:04,590 --> 00:16:06,470
I see a little kitty cat.
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Oh, he fell into a hole.
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I better save the little soul.
193
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I'm going to get him out of there.
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By the way, how's my hair?
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Good life.
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It's pathetic.
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Get out of here and don't come back till
you have something to show for
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00:16:45,180 --> 00:16:47,220
yourself. You mean I get to go and live
again?
199
00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:49,720
Yes, and I hope you've learned
something.
200
00:16:49,980 --> 00:16:54,560
Oh, I have, Grandma. This brush with
death has taught me never to take life
201
00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:56,420
granted. No, Bubba.
202
00:16:56,780 --> 00:16:59,980
Just never fly your kite where they're
digging a hole.
203
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:02,760
Oh, gosh, you're so much wiser than my
other grandmother.
204
00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:04,760
Oh, she's here, too.
205
00:17:05,339 --> 00:17:07,420
You're kidding. And she killed a cop.
206
00:17:09,180 --> 00:17:11,839
Boy, they've really lowered their
standards, haven't they, Grandma?
207
00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:14,619
Well, anyway, it's great to see you.
208
00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:17,940
Godspeed, Gary Shandley. Thanks,
Grandma.
209
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:19,380
See you next year.
210
00:17:22,740 --> 00:17:24,339
What do you mean, next year, Grandma?
211
00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:26,280
Am I going to die?
212
00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:27,520
Oh, no, no.
213
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,840
I'm coming back as a pony.
214
00:17:30,620 --> 00:17:36,540
Oh, that is such good news. As a pony.
Well, I'll have my picture taken on you.
215
00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:38,560
Isn't that going to be fun?
216
00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:48,310
Yes.
217
00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:25,080
He made fun of me while I was in the
hall.
218
00:18:26,820 --> 00:18:30,000
All right. Come this way.
219
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:32,380
All right. Come on, Johnny. Come to our
letter.
220
00:18:32,700 --> 00:18:36,680
All right.
221
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:38,680
All right, Johnny. All right.
222
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:42,300
Oh, I thought I was gone again. Right
then, I thought.
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00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:46,680
We were worried enough. Sit down over
here. We're going to take a break. Okay,
224
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:48,900
we're going to sit on the couch. No, not
the couch. The couch.
225
00:18:49,140 --> 00:18:50,139
Yeah, okay.
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00:18:50,140 --> 00:18:52,260
Oh, no, the chair. The chair. Oh, of
course, the chair.
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00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:53,680
Easy.
228
00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:54,960
No, no, no.
229
00:18:55,980 --> 00:18:57,000
Tina Louise's house.
230
00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:58,200
The couch. No, no, no.
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00:18:58,360 --> 00:18:59,360
Let's go to Tina Louise's house.
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00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,740
No, come on. I'm hurt bad enough. Come
on, bud.
233
00:19:15,590 --> 00:19:18,850
And my hair will look perfect. My hair
always looks perfect.
234
00:19:19,850 --> 00:19:21,050
Can I have a pillow?
235
00:19:21,350 --> 00:19:22,530
Oh, you bet. You bet.
236
00:19:22,970 --> 00:19:26,790
Thanks. Oh, beautiful. There you go.
237
00:19:27,050 --> 00:19:28,170
All right. Oh,
238
00:19:29,570 --> 00:19:31,930
I thought I was falling down in between
the chair and the sofa.
239
00:19:34,050 --> 00:19:35,009
You're fine.
240
00:19:35,010 --> 00:19:35,969
You're home.
241
00:19:35,970 --> 00:19:39,330
Oh, can the people at home see up my
nose?
242
00:19:41,670 --> 00:19:42,810
Oh, Nance.
243
00:19:43,590 --> 00:19:44,830
I was so scared.
244
00:19:45,170 --> 00:19:46,170
Yeah.
245
00:19:46,490 --> 00:19:49,550
Where are all the gifts and the flowers
that all the well -wishers sent?
246
00:19:50,450 --> 00:19:51,590
The gifts and flowers?
247
00:19:51,930 --> 00:19:53,070
There aren't any.
248
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:55,850
There aren't any? No. Will the president
call?
249
00:19:57,790 --> 00:19:58,790
President of what?
250
00:19:59,110 --> 00:20:00,450
President of the United States called.
251
00:20:01,290 --> 00:20:02,990
Well, no. Why would he?
252
00:20:03,930 --> 00:20:06,850
Well, I don't know. He called when baby
Jessica fell in that hole.
253
00:20:08,070 --> 00:20:11,670
No, Gary. Maybe the Secretary of Defense
called somebody. No, Gary.
254
00:20:12,330 --> 00:20:16,690
a tragedy involving a two -year -old
child, and let's face it, you're a 38
255
00:20:16,690 --> 00:20:17,690
-old adult.
256
00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:21,450
You know, I think even the president
knows you should have known better.
257
00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:28,630
Gar, the important thing is that you're
feeling good now, right? Yeah, I'm
258
00:20:28,630 --> 00:20:31,770
pretty good, yeah. Because I've been
thinking about something. You know,
259
00:20:31,770 --> 00:20:38,230
long, lonely hours you spent down in
that cold, damp hole there, they didn't
260
00:20:38,230 --> 00:20:40,070
make you feel the slightest bit.
261
00:20:41,220 --> 00:20:42,520
litigious or anything, did they?
262
00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:48,980
Should I be insulted?
263
00:20:49,060 --> 00:20:51,900
Yes. Is he pulling a Diane Lewis on me?
264
00:20:52,440 --> 00:20:56,460
I have to get this over with. I've taken
the liberty of drawing up these papers
265
00:20:56,460 --> 00:21:00,060
here. It's just a completely standard
agreement indemnifying the Condo
266
00:21:00,060 --> 00:21:03,680
Association from lawsuits arising from
any tenant mishaps or anything like
267
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:04,800
I've signed a million of them.
268
00:21:05,360 --> 00:21:08,800
Don't you sign this. Don't you sign
this. No, I'll sign it under one
269
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:09,919
Under one condition.
270
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:14,080
What is it, Gary? Anything you want.
Okay. I want a stable put on the grass.
271
00:21:14,360 --> 00:21:15,360
Stable.
272
00:21:15,700 --> 00:21:16,700
Uh, Bubba?
273
00:21:17,550 --> 00:21:19,110
Uh, why a stable?
274
00:21:19,330 --> 00:21:23,490
Why? Because, good news, Mom, Grandma's
coming home next year.
275
00:21:25,530 --> 00:21:26,530
Grandma's coming.
276
00:21:26,550 --> 00:21:27,550
That's right. Next year.
277
00:21:27,750 --> 00:21:28,750
Grandma's coming.
278
00:21:28,910 --> 00:21:31,010
That's right. Oh, dear, you'll feel
better. Remember to get a beer. You'll
279
00:21:31,010 --> 00:21:32,710
better tomorrow when you get a little
rest.
280
00:21:32,910 --> 00:21:35,490
Yeah, and get your, oh, yeah, remember
to get a beer. I mean, to get a double
281
00:21:35,490 --> 00:21:36,490
padlock.
282
00:21:36,780 --> 00:21:40,660
You know, I just want to say goodnight
to everybody and remind you that the
283
00:21:40,660 --> 00:21:44,820
was really no indictment against kite
flying whatsoever. It's a fine and
284
00:21:44,820 --> 00:21:47,080
sport and keeps kids off the streets.
285
00:21:47,740 --> 00:21:48,860
Well, sort of.
286
00:21:50,940 --> 00:21:56,300
So I'll see you all next week and really
just remember what we learned tonight,
287
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,760
everybody. Don't fly a kite where
they're what?
288
00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:02,000
Digging a hole.
289
00:22:03,580 --> 00:22:04,920
Oh, kitty, kitty.
290
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:07,160
I gotta get kitty kitty.
291
00:23:11,050 --> 00:23:13,110
Hope you enjoyed it, Gary Chandling.
22122
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