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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:32,750 --> 00:00:35,510 Welcome to Important Things with Dimitri Martin. I'm Dimitri Martin. 2 00:00:35,970 --> 00:00:38,550 Tonight's important thing is brain. 3 00:00:39,310 --> 00:00:43,270 Brain. What do we start with? Okay, we got a lot of options for covering this 4 00:00:43,270 --> 00:00:48,730 thing. We can start the show with jokes, read some idiot's mind, or get high and 5 00:00:48,730 --> 00:00:49,730 do puzzles. 6 00:00:53,190 --> 00:00:54,190 Joke. 7 00:00:54,950 --> 00:00:58,070 An easy way to separate man from animals is his ability to reason. 8 00:00:59,070 --> 00:01:01,010 Another thing you can go by is last names. 9 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:07,439 What's his name? 10 00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:08,440 Patches? 11 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:10,400 Patches what? 12 00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:12,960 That's a dog. Don't waste my time. Come on. 13 00:01:15,020 --> 00:01:17,620 So I think these twins are really interesting because they're the only 14 00:01:17,620 --> 00:01:20,340 who can write a biography and an autobiography at the same time. 15 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:27,940 I remember when I was in school, my teacher said, can you name the 16 00:01:28,980 --> 00:01:30,640 I was like, sure. 17 00:01:30,900 --> 00:01:32,800 They already have names, but if you want me to do that. 18 00:01:36,330 --> 00:01:39,770 I'm talking to one of my friends, and I said, ATM machine. 19 00:01:40,770 --> 00:01:45,270 And he said, you know, the M stands for machine. 20 00:01:45,910 --> 00:01:48,590 So you're repeating, you're basically saying ATM machine machine. 21 00:01:49,890 --> 00:01:53,890 So then I corrected myself. So now I say, ATM -a -sheen. 22 00:01:57,710 --> 00:02:01,470 If you're colorblind, eating candy must be a completely different experience. 23 00:02:03,530 --> 00:02:04,530 All right. 24 00:02:05,009 --> 00:02:06,710 Come on, Starburst, let's see what we got here. 25 00:02:09,050 --> 00:02:10,050 Lemon, damn it! 26 00:02:13,110 --> 00:02:16,210 I was in the gym and this really big guy got mad at me because he was like, spot 27 00:02:16,210 --> 00:02:17,290 me, spot me, spot me. 28 00:02:18,490 --> 00:02:20,410 I was like, okay, you're right there. 29 00:02:32,840 --> 00:02:38,100 At 10 .05pm on November 13th, 2007, Eric Sterberger was spell -checking his 30 00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:42,380 college application essay on what three great historical minds he'd most like to 31 00:02:42,380 --> 00:02:46,900 have dinner with when a lightning bolt struck his computer, catapulting him 32 00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:51,780 through the space -time continuum to a nearby TGIFs, where he found himself 33 00:02:51,780 --> 00:02:55,760 seated across from the very geniuses he was writing about, Benjamin Franklin, 34 00:02:56,100 --> 00:02:59,660 William Shakespeare, and Galileo Galilei. Oh, my God! 35 00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:06,800 You guys are all really here. 36 00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:08,380 We are here, Eric. 37 00:03:09,100 --> 00:03:10,100 Oh, man. 38 00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:11,600 Oh, my God. 39 00:03:11,820 --> 00:03:12,820 At your service. 40 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:14,400 Thank you for choosing us. 41 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:17,500 I have so many questions. I have no idea where to begin. 42 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:19,160 Mr. 43 00:03:19,420 --> 00:03:22,300 Franklin. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's do that. Let's do the questions. 44 00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:24,740 Can you tell me a little bit... Are you guys all ready to order? You need 45 00:03:24,740 --> 00:03:25,740 another minute. 46 00:03:26,020 --> 00:03:27,520 Hello. Well, I'm ready now. 47 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:30,200 I think we are, too. Let's do this. Let's do this thing. 48 00:03:30,920 --> 00:03:33,580 Pray, tell me, might you be on this menu? 49 00:03:35,060 --> 00:03:37,960 Nope. Shame, because I'd order that. 50 00:03:39,540 --> 00:03:41,880 No, I will take the chicken fajitas. 51 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:44,100 Hot. Spicy. 52 00:03:44,540 --> 00:03:46,320 Shakespeare taking it south of the border. 53 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:48,040 And an appletini. 54 00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:50,680 Okay, and for you, sir? What would you recommend, Kathy? 55 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:52,480 The burger's good. 56 00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:54,200 I love a big, juicy burger, huh? 57 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:55,400 I'm not going to lie. 58 00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:57,220 Does that burger come with warm buns? 59 00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:01,020 That'd be better. 60 00:04:01,140 --> 00:04:02,140 Better salsa. 61 00:04:03,060 --> 00:04:04,060 And for you, sir? 62 00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:09,080 I'm going to have a tuna club, jalapeno poppers, and an iced tea. Okay, and for 63 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:10,340 you? I'll just have water. 64 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:11,900 Water. Kids on a diet. 65 00:04:12,380 --> 00:04:13,380 Thanks, 66 00:04:13,740 --> 00:04:14,740 guys. Thank you, 67 00:04:16,260 --> 00:04:17,199 Kathy. 68 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:18,720 Okay. Oh, oh. 69 00:04:19,279 --> 00:04:21,920 That is the perfect ass gentleman. 70 00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:23,300 Boinga de boinga. 71 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:24,579 Am I right? 72 00:04:24,580 --> 00:04:25,580 Pure poetry. 73 00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:27,900 Wow. Konnichiwa. Wow. 74 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:31,360 Galileo, where were you? What? Did you not see her? 75 00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:36,560 I'd like to take off a slow, you know? Ooh, slow -plated. There you go. 76 00:04:37,540 --> 00:04:39,260 That's the move. Snake in the grass. 77 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,240 Hey, hey, hey. 78 00:04:41,580 --> 00:04:45,520 Can we just talk about my questions? Eric. Yes. 79 00:04:45,780 --> 00:04:48,480 Sorry. You go ahead. Okay. 80 00:04:49,100 --> 00:04:50,100 Mr. Shakespeare. 81 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:51,900 Mr. Eric. Oh, here she comes. 82 00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:55,280 There she is, Miss America. 83 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:57,420 All right, Kathy. 84 00:04:57,800 --> 00:04:58,799 Enter Kathy. 85 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,600 Restaurant left. Looking lovely. 86 00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:02,240 Take it down. Very nice. 87 00:05:03,920 --> 00:05:06,620 Whoopsie -daisy. Oh, are you kidding me? 88 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:11,720 Okay. Huh? 89 00:05:13,820 --> 00:05:14,820 Galileo, what the fuck? 90 00:05:15,700 --> 00:05:16,880 What? He? What? 91 00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:20,960 Seriously, Galileo, that was horrible. Why would you do that? I'm making my 92 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:22,080 move. No, it's a little early. 93 00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:24,340 You talk, it's chitter -chatter. Misjudged. 94 00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:27,100 This judge. This is our hand at space. 95 00:05:27,340 --> 00:05:28,700 Excuse me. Excuse me, gentlemen. 96 00:05:28,940 --> 00:05:30,760 Hello, sir. Is everything okay here? 97 00:05:30,980 --> 00:05:36,660 Very good. Very good. I just had a complaint from one of my servers that 98 00:05:36,660 --> 00:05:38,000 you might have grabbed her. 99 00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:39,239 No. No. 100 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:41,260 Really? Out of here. Sir. 101 00:05:41,700 --> 00:05:43,180 You? Not here. Nope. 102 00:05:43,480 --> 00:05:44,900 Not us. Sir. Not us. 103 00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:46,560 What? 104 00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:49,700 You looking at me? I'm looking at you. Okay, fine. 105 00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:50,879 But you know what? 106 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:54,930 She's a... Hey, waitress. Oh, boy. She coming over here, leaning over the 107 00:05:54,950 --> 00:05:57,110 going to Shakespeare. That was bad. That was actually bad. 108 00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:59,990 Maybe her ass will bump into my hand. 109 00:06:00,350 --> 00:06:01,350 You know what? 110 00:06:01,770 --> 00:06:03,930 That's fine. I'm going to ask you guys to leave now. Come on. 111 00:06:04,310 --> 00:06:06,510 I want you to go. I want you out. Come on. 112 00:06:06,750 --> 00:06:09,550 Come on. I appreciate it. Let's go. Come on. 113 00:06:10,330 --> 00:06:10,969 We'll go. 114 00:06:10,970 --> 00:06:12,550 I want you out. Let's go. Then we go. 115 00:06:13,430 --> 00:06:14,430 Really? 116 00:06:15,270 --> 00:06:16,270 Hey, everybody. 117 00:06:16,290 --> 00:06:20,110 The manager of TGIF kicking out of Galileo. I make an attempt. 118 00:06:29,419 --> 00:06:34,880 You look like a pirate. What? You heard me. Say it again. 119 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:10,840 Brain. Brain send me thoughts of what I ought to do. When I look at you, I 120 00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:13,020 wonder if you have those thoughts too. 121 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:16,280 Think. Think. 122 00:07:18,060 --> 00:07:22,140 of the tinkle of the sprinkle and the drinkle of the water. That is knowledge. 123 00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:26,260 Brains are what? 124 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:31,240 Hello, Jamie. 125 00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:35,120 How was work today? 126 00:07:38,340 --> 00:07:41,460 Lucky break, fat boy. 127 00:07:53,580 --> 00:07:54,740 Excuse me. Yeah. 128 00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:57,480 Sorry. I'm just trying. 129 00:07:58,740 --> 00:08:00,240 I'll go in then. 130 00:08:01,460 --> 00:08:02,460 What are you doing? 131 00:08:03,500 --> 00:08:05,420 I said excuse me. Get nice. 132 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:11,980 I said excuse me. 133 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:14,620 Get out of the way. 134 00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:17,480 That's my baby. 135 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:20,840 She's cute. What's your baby's name? 136 00:08:21,180 --> 00:08:22,180 Stella. 137 00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:23,480 She's cute too. 138 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:29,280 Yeah, yeah. 139 00:08:35,780 --> 00:08:37,860 Let's take a look at brains in a little more detail. 140 00:08:38,679 --> 00:08:42,179 This is a graph. The thickness of a person's neck versus the thickness of 141 00:08:42,179 --> 00:08:43,179 books they've read. 142 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:50,540 You'll see that as the neck gets thicker, the thickness of the books 143 00:08:53,260 --> 00:08:56,680 Until a crucial point where they start wondering, why the hell is my neck so 144 00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:58,440 abnormally thick? I need to read up on this. 145 00:09:03,540 --> 00:09:06,020 This would be medical text about neck thickness. 146 00:09:09,020 --> 00:09:11,080 Neck. That's an improper fraction. 147 00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:14,680 And that is a really improper fraction. 148 00:09:23,950 --> 00:09:28,090 This is actually very interesting. This is a GPA versus limbs. All right, let's 149 00:09:28,090 --> 00:09:31,810 look at the values. 4 .0, for GPA, that's great. For limbs, good, good. 150 00:09:34,030 --> 00:09:36,210 3 .5, good GPA, bad. 151 00:09:38,050 --> 00:09:40,070 3 .0, pretty good GPA, bad. 152 00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:43,730 2 .0, average GPA, bad. 153 00:09:45,450 --> 00:09:48,050 1 .0, you're not going anywhere. You're not going anywhere. 154 00:09:57,550 --> 00:09:58,550 Let's talk about memory. 155 00:09:59,730 --> 00:10:04,150 Okay, we all know that memory is associated with certain senses. So if 156 00:10:04,150 --> 00:10:07,730 something, you might remember it pretty well. If you see something, even better. 157 00:10:08,250 --> 00:10:12,150 Smell, as you may have heard, is really strong for triggering a memory. 158 00:10:13,030 --> 00:10:16,910 But what's even stronger is, is if something's inserted into your body. 159 00:10:20,450 --> 00:10:21,450 That's strong. 160 00:10:23,750 --> 00:10:24,830 Where are my keys? 161 00:10:30,380 --> 00:10:32,140 I got my keys, but I need a band -aid, actually. 162 00:10:35,620 --> 00:10:42,100 Between Michelangelo and Donatello, there was... ...Dimitri. 163 00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:49,620 For thousands of years, the power of flight has belonged only to birds. 164 00:10:50,380 --> 00:10:54,960 But no longer shall man be cursed to walk the earth and stare longingly up at 165 00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:55,960 the clouds. 166 00:10:56,280 --> 00:10:58,920 By closely studying the anatomy of birds... 167 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:02,580 I will build a flying machine and take to the sky. 168 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:06,400 What mechanism propels a creature into the air? 169 00:11:09,140 --> 00:11:10,260 Of course. 170 00:11:10,860 --> 00:11:11,860 Yes. 171 00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:13,940 Flight will be mine. 172 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:33,720 Let's take a look at some simple equations. 173 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,880 Equations help our brains understand how the world works. 174 00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:38,560 Okay. 175 00:11:40,860 --> 00:11:42,940 Rate times time equals distance. 176 00:11:43,700 --> 00:11:48,220 It also equals how expensive a hooker is. 177 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:54,040 Okay. 178 00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:56,380 Let U represent U. 179 00:11:56,980 --> 00:11:59,240 Let C represent a comic book store. 180 00:12:01,310 --> 00:12:06,410 You times the comic book store over time equals lonely. 181 00:12:09,610 --> 00:12:11,250 This one's a little more complicated. 182 00:12:12,470 --> 00:12:15,030 Let X equal a popular girl in high school. 183 00:12:15,890 --> 00:12:21,650 Now, add 20 years, subtract a job, 184 00:12:21,770 --> 00:12:28,690 multiply that by a couch, and you get fat. 185 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:39,120 P equals the amount of pizza there is divided by me plus my friend, 186 00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:45,760 which always comes out to one less than the number of slices I want to eat. 187 00:12:48,780 --> 00:12:50,020 And that equals... 188 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:06,500 I like that thing and I wouldn't touch that with a 10 -foot pole. 189 00:14:06,860 --> 00:14:09,280 That always made sense to me until I reversed it. 190 00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:11,120 I was like, wait a minute. 191 00:14:11,940 --> 00:14:14,140 I would touch that with a 10 -foot pole. 192 00:14:17,420 --> 00:14:19,140 You would touch that with a 10 -foot pole? 193 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:23,700 Yeah, I'd definitely touch it if I, you know, with a 10 -foot pole. 194 00:14:24,940 --> 00:14:27,480 That's not that different than not touching it with a 10 -foot pole. 195 00:14:28,980 --> 00:14:33,300 Once a 10 -foot pole's involved, it's pretty much the same kind of situation. 196 00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:38,700 Yeah, but I'm, you know, I'm just saying I'd poke it and be involved with it 197 00:14:38,700 --> 00:14:41,720 with the pole. You know, I had the pole. Yeah, but it's not the same. No, but 198 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:45,160 I'm saying with the temple pole and as much as it's in my presence, I'm not 199 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:46,780 using the pole to touch it. 200 00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:49,060 There's me with the temple pole and I'm touching it. 201 00:14:51,900 --> 00:14:52,900 Really? 202 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,180 That's how I roll with prepositions, man. Come on. 203 00:14:58,540 --> 00:15:00,260 Fairly important fairy tale. 204 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:03,040 The Prince and the Pauper. 205 00:15:03,390 --> 00:15:04,650 Five years later. 206 00:15:04,950 --> 00:15:05,950 Hey! Hey! 207 00:15:06,250 --> 00:15:07,250 Hey, hello. 208 00:15:07,390 --> 00:15:08,390 Great to see you. 209 00:15:08,590 --> 00:15:09,329 Remember me? 210 00:15:09,330 --> 00:15:11,110 Prince of the Boardwalk. We did the switch. 211 00:15:11,330 --> 00:15:12,330 What a surprise. 212 00:15:12,670 --> 00:15:13,649 Can I tell you something? 213 00:15:13,650 --> 00:15:20,250 I love this. The whole crown, the castle, the food is really 214 00:15:20,250 --> 00:15:23,590 something. Thank you. Thank you. Great to catch up. 215 00:15:23,950 --> 00:15:25,010 Great to see you. 216 00:15:25,270 --> 00:15:27,350 Okay. Right. I'm going to get back to the... What? 217 00:15:27,570 --> 00:15:30,230 Let you and me switch. 218 00:15:30,830 --> 00:15:35,900 Um, so you become a... And I go back to... Come on. There's an idea. Come on. 219 00:15:35,900 --> 00:15:38,920 What a great idea. Do you know, that's a terrific idea. 220 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:41,320 Here's another thought. Let's say we are. 221 00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:42,920 How's that? 222 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:44,040 No? 223 00:15:44,620 --> 00:15:45,620 Second idea. 224 00:15:46,220 --> 00:15:48,080 Okay? Just firing them out. 225 00:15:48,660 --> 00:15:49,960 Um, kill him. 226 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:53,400 Mia! 227 00:15:56,480 --> 00:16:02,020 Let's educate every boy and girl for the children are the future of the world. 228 00:16:02,510 --> 00:16:03,910 What shall we teach them? 229 00:16:04,390 --> 00:16:06,830 Let's teach them to work very hard. 230 00:16:07,530 --> 00:16:11,910 Because children are basically animals you can train to do the work you don't 231 00:16:11,910 --> 00:16:12,910 want to. 232 00:16:18,230 --> 00:16:20,790 Mnemonics. These are really helpful for remembering things. I want to just run 233 00:16:20,790 --> 00:16:24,110 through a couple of them right now. Okay, let's start with the planet. 234 00:16:25,690 --> 00:16:29,190 Now... Footnote, I'm including Pluto in the planets because I think it's 235 00:16:29,190 --> 00:16:31,990 terrible what they did to Pluto and it's still a planet to me. I grew up with 236 00:16:31,990 --> 00:16:33,470 Pluto as a planet. I'll always be a planet. 237 00:16:34,770 --> 00:16:41,570 Okay, you want to remember the 238 00:16:41,570 --> 00:16:42,950 planets, including Pluto. 239 00:16:44,130 --> 00:16:47,870 Just use this simple mnemonic that involves state capitals. 240 00:16:48,070 --> 00:16:55,070 Okay, Montpelier, Vermont, Madison, Juneau, Nashville, Pierre, Mercury, 241 00:16:55,230 --> 00:16:56,230 Venus, 242 00:16:56,650 --> 00:17:02,230 Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Uranus, Nashville, and Pluto. 243 00:17:06,390 --> 00:17:07,589 Okay, next. 244 00:17:08,290 --> 00:17:10,530 You want to remember the order of the alphabet. 245 00:17:11,630 --> 00:17:14,730 It's pretty long, but this can help. A sentence, a simple sentence. 246 00:17:15,290 --> 00:17:18,869 Always beware of cats darting erratically forward going halfway into 247 00:17:18,869 --> 00:17:22,390 Kathy, lest mopey neighbors open poorly quilted radioactive sunlamps to 248 00:17:22,390 --> 00:17:24,650 ultraviolet waves or x -rays. Yo, Zach! 249 00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:31,780 This is the sketch. 250 00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:32,980 Yes, it is. 251 00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:35,300 This is the sketch. That's right. 252 00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:39,100 This is the sketch. Yes, it is. The sketch. 253 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:44,360 We put something in the show to test our viewers. Hopefully you caught it. 254 00:17:45,420 --> 00:17:47,440 There was no Saturn in that line -up of planets. 255 00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:53,220 If you caught that, congratulations, your brain is working. 256 00:18:07,340 --> 00:18:12,900 Between Socrates and Plato, there was Demetrius. 257 00:18:14,460 --> 00:18:16,640 What is the basis of attraction? 258 00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,120 Is it not in the mind? 259 00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:23,880 Nature dictates that the man is attracted to the body of the young 260 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:28,940 woman, but the woman is attracted to the intellect and superior intelligence of 261 00:18:28,940 --> 00:18:32,160 the man, the older, wiser man, her teacher, for example. 262 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:36,260 But sometimes, nature makes a terrible mistake. 263 00:18:37,260 --> 00:18:42,280 And the woman is attracted to some brute with disgustingly large muscles who 264 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:45,140 knows nothing of poetry or mathematics. 265 00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:49,460 I would have taught you mathematics, bitch. 266 00:18:50,500 --> 00:18:51,640 So I used to do graffiti. 267 00:18:51,980 --> 00:18:56,000 What I would usually do is I would just try to, like, do the least amount of 268 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,040 work but still have an impact. 269 00:18:58,180 --> 00:19:01,840 So, like, if I saw a pizza parlor, I would just, like, add a Z to it. 270 00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:06,860 And people would be like, man, there's a lot of pizzazz parlors in this part of 271 00:19:06,860 --> 00:19:07,860 town. 272 00:19:08,420 --> 00:19:10,840 The village has way more flair than I thought. 273 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:16,980 Get your ass in the car. 274 00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:20,140 That's pretty strong. That's the command. 275 00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:23,580 But word order does matter. 276 00:19:30,260 --> 00:19:32,320 Get the car in your ass. 277 00:19:34,780 --> 00:19:37,200 I got a Hot Wheels fetish and we're going to work this out. 278 00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:40,640 Hey. 279 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:43,740 My friend asked me if I ever swam with dolphins. 280 00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:46,500 And I was like, yeah, of course. 281 00:19:48,420 --> 00:19:49,820 What distance are we talking about? 282 00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:52,640 From the dolphin. 283 00:19:54,460 --> 00:19:57,840 Because the last time I was in the ocean, I'm pretty sure I swam with most 284 00:19:57,840 --> 00:19:58,840 them. 285 00:20:00,040 --> 00:20:01,040 Think about it. 286 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:03,240 All right. 287 00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:11,970 I'd like to take a minute just to thank some of our sponsors for tonight's 288 00:20:11,970 --> 00:20:12,990 important thing, brains. 289 00:20:14,270 --> 00:20:17,150 Brains brought to you by tweed jackets and glasses. 290 00:20:18,390 --> 00:20:20,790 The timeless uniform of the pompous ass. 291 00:20:23,470 --> 00:20:25,450 Brains brought to you by the prenuptial agreement. 292 00:20:27,010 --> 00:20:30,090 Still the smartest way to say, I love you, but I don't trust you. 293 00:20:32,990 --> 00:20:36,530 Brought to you by physics, containing the power to bring down your grade point 294 00:20:36,530 --> 00:20:37,530 average. 295 00:20:40,820 --> 00:20:42,240 Quite a graphic we got for that. 296 00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:49,580 Brought to you by Raising Your Voice, the next best thing to being right. 297 00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:55,040 Thanks to all our sponsors. 22073