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1
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(♪)
2
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I used to be somebody.
3
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In the big city.
4
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I shined the light of truth
on the city's seedy underbelly.
5
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Drug busts, dirty cops,
6
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greasy politicians, overzealous Karens?
7
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I was respected and feared.
8
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Even the local cartel “Jefes” had a name for me.
9
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El feo verdad!
10
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But it all fell apart.
11
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And now I'm back here, in my hometown
12
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(car horn beeping)
13
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in Florida.
14
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(♪) “You are, my private love baby.”
15
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(♪) “You are...”
16
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“It's time to tell you baby...”
17
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Hey!
18
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Welcome to swinging Dickies,
where the swinging never stops.
19
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Would you like to try our two ball explosion?
20
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It's on special today.
21
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Sounds a little filling.
22
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I'll take a double bourbon and a
point in the direction of Chastity please.
23
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(♪)
24
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Good seats.
25
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Got to be careful not to get too close
26
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or you get slapped in the face.
27
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Flogged by log...
28
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It's two bucks. You wanna go?
29
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Are you his agent?
30
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Girl has got to make a living.
31
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Ahhh well, I'm working.
32
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My company has a strict “no flog” policy.
33
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I'm a reporter.
34
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(clears throat)
35
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You got something to hide there?
36
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Nope. Nope.
37
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Just thought your ahh, cutie pie face, is going
to be good for at least four or five flogs.
38
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Cutie pie.
39
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You going to ask me something?
40
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Or am I going to have to find
another way to test your gag reflex?
41
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Friar Frick... You used to work for him.
42
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Where were you when you went missing?
43
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Just doing my goddamn job! Making
the rounds, collecting the debts.
44
00:02:02,088 --> 00:02:04,849
That was a bad week though.
45
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Everybody wanted to kill
Frick for not placing their bets.
46
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What do you think he did with all that money?
47
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Who knows?
48
00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:15,693
He probably hid it with all the rest of the money.
49
00:02:15,735 --> 00:02:17,462
I don't think he spends any of it.
50
00:02:17,504 --> 00:02:21,808
Lives in that shit trailer over by the swamp.
51
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Simmo, man!
52
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What did you want for $20?
53
00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:26,471
It wasn't even $20.
54
00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:29,407
It was $17 and a coupon.
55
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(phone chirps) I mean, what you expect?
Wait a minute.
56
00:02:31,519 --> 00:02:34,278
Wait a minute.
57
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I got to go.
58
00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:43,888
So you were furious at Frick too?
59
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Not enough to kill him.
60
00:02:45,198 --> 00:02:48,401
I didn't say you did.
61
00:02:48,468 --> 00:02:50,027
So, Roscoe...
62
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You guys used to be an item, right?
63
00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:57,043
For three wonderful toe-tingling years.
64
00:02:57,143 --> 00:03:01,472
You know, you wouldn't think a boy like
that would do it for a girl like me but,
65
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:04,408
he had curves in all the right places.
66
00:03:04,450 --> 00:03:08,246
Curves? Roscoe is a skinny guy.
67
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I'm talking about his junk.
68
00:03:11,324 --> 00:03:14,961
Now he's got a severe case of the Peyronie's
69
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Some guys just have that one bend.
70
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:24,938
But in Roscoe's case, he had a goddamn corkscrew.
71
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Sounds painful.
72
00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:29,133
Oh, maybe for him, but for me,
73
00:03:29,175 --> 00:03:33,971
Ooh, Ecstasy.
74
00:03:34,013 --> 00:03:36,240
So why'd you guys break up?
75
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The Peyronie's consumed him.
76
00:03:39,252 --> 00:03:41,746
He became bitter and impotent.
77
00:03:41,788 --> 00:03:45,191
So Roscoe wasn't always a bitter, angry redneck.
78
00:03:45,258 --> 00:03:48,828
No, no, he used to be my teddy bear.
79
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Bring me treats.
80
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:53,499
He was so sweet and kind.
81
00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:56,127
(♪) “I ain't trying to be rich.”
82
00:03:56,169 --> 00:03:59,030
(♪) “have a high-priced phone.”
83
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,432
(♪) “or have a picket fence”
84
00:04:01,474 --> 00:04:04,068
(♪) “or have a perfect lawn.”
85
00:04:04,110 --> 00:04:07,071
(♪) “I don't need no hired help.”
86
00:04:07,113 --> 00:04:10,350
(♪) “to run my home.”
87
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:14,621
(♪) “I just don't want to be po' no more.”
88
00:04:14,721 --> 00:04:17,315
(♪) “I don't need to play golf”
89
00:04:17,357 --> 00:04:19,917
(♪) “at the country club.”
90
00:04:19,959 --> 00:04:21,352
(♪) “I don't need to show off.”
91
00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:25,064
(♪) “I don't care to one up.”
92
00:04:25,164 --> 00:04:27,792
(♪) “I ain't even know one.”
93
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:31,271
(♪) “I don't know the Jones.”
94
00:04:31,337 --> 00:04:36,267
(♪) “I just don't want to be po’ no more”
95
00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:41,772
(♪) “Oh, I don't know what I did wrong”
96
00:04:41,814 --> 00:04:48,154
(♪) To be Oh so Po’ for Oh, for so long...”
97
00:04:49,822 --> 00:04:51,949
But I need a man that can keep up with me.
98
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(♪)
99
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God damn! Deuce!
100
00:05:18,017 --> 00:05:20,386
What the hell you doin' up in here?
101
00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:25,516
What the... Is?
102
00:05:25,558 --> 00:05:28,394
Uh! Ahhh!
103
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:31,497
My hands all sticky!
104
00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:35,702
Alright, I'm in business,
105
00:05:35,768 --> 00:05:37,303
Wash my hands later.
106
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Jackpot!
107
00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:50,608
All right.
108
00:05:50,650 --> 00:05:53,210
Yeah, this is going to be.
109
00:05:53,252 --> 00:05:54,779
What the?
110
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Captain's log.
111
00:05:55,988 --> 00:05:58,916
Day 5 of Project Dirty Neck Takeover.
112
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(Duece chuckles)
113
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Everyone in this town is so fucking stupid.
114
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This shit crazy.
115
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This shit's crazy, Ace!
116
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Crazy!
117
00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:13,597
I need to tell you about the new lady in my life.
118
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So beautiful.
119
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So beautiful.
120
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:21,472
So when Frick stiffed him, Roscoe was?
121
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Madder than spit!
122
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He was filled with so much bitterness and rage.
123
00:06:27,553 --> 00:06:30,481
It's no wonder that he killed Frick.
124
00:06:30,523 --> 00:06:34,961
So why do you think he stuffed
him in his ice cream truck freezer?
125
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:37,054
'Scuse me.
126
00:06:37,096 --> 00:06:40,391
Remember, the Holes of Glory
prayer group is going to be coming in.
127
00:06:40,433 --> 00:06:42,760
Poppin by real soon.
128
00:06:42,802 --> 00:06:44,161
Holes of glory?
129
00:06:44,203 --> 00:06:48,074
It's a group real strange men
obsessed with the holes in the walls.
130
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You don't say.
131
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(Spanish)
132
00:06:50,543 --> 00:06:52,970
We got to get back to the trailer before it gets dark.
133
00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:55,982
I got a new metal detector
battery and some new shovels.
134
00:06:56,115 --> 00:07:02,922
Metal detector? Shovels?
135
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:04,181
Joey!
136
00:07:04,223 --> 00:07:08,185
Hey! A man's got to make a living, eh?
137
00:07:08,227 --> 00:07:11,063
(♪)
138
00:07:11,130 --> 00:07:14,125
She’s like... she’s too spicy to be a burrito.
139
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She’s more like... she’s a spicy jalapeno.
140
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You going down!
141
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Alright!
142
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Gotcha now mother fucka!
143
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Clean this shit up.
144
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(laughter)
145
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Cheetah! It's supposed to be the mouse gets the cheese.
146
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That ruins the whole analogy!
147
00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:44,622
Sorry guys.
148
00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:47,591
Look, maybe when Roscoe gets
captured, we can use all this information
149
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:49,393
as part of a wrap up story.
150
00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:51,996
I sure hope he's caught unharmed.
151
00:07:52,038 --> 00:07:53,531
He needs help.
152
00:07:53,573 --> 00:07:58,144
Yeah... Uh.
153
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:07,077
Umm... You see that sexually frustrated
154
00:08:07,119 --> 00:08:09,522
man down at the end of the stage there?
155
00:08:09,589 --> 00:08:11,557
How much will this get him?
156
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:16,654
Leon!
Si.
157
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You go give him the works.
158
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You got it baby.
159
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(laughter)
160
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Hey Poppy!
161
00:08:22,401 --> 00:08:23,694
Let's party! (♪)
162
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(♪)
163
00:08:29,876 --> 00:08:33,704
(crying out loud)
164
00:08:33,746 --> 00:08:36,173
(♪)
165
00:08:36,215 --> 00:08:41,178
Hey... Deputy... It’s Ace.
166
00:08:41,220 --> 00:08:45,124
Yeah, she's been nursing
drinks at Swingin’ Dickies all day.
167
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:48,995
You can probably get some prints off the glass.
168
00:08:49,061 --> 00:08:51,755
All right?
169
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I'll call you when I'm there.
170
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Bye.
171
00:08:56,636 --> 00:09:01,240
We are going to goose the Deuce.
172
00:09:01,340 --> 00:09:05,736
(♪)
173
00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:07,705
Hey, took you long enough!
174
00:09:07,747 --> 00:09:10,641
The code word was “the mouse has the cheese.”
175
00:09:10,683 --> 00:09:15,087
Man, I told you I'm a cheetah. I'm fast,
Ace! Never see me comin', man. I'm a cheetah!
176
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Fine.
177
00:09:16,589 --> 00:09:18,749
Take the drive to Tanya.
178
00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:21,252
Why are you always wearing these whack-ass clothes?
179
00:09:21,294 --> 00:09:22,052
Dude!
180
00:09:22,094 --> 00:09:23,420
I’m not going to put this on.
181
00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:24,855
Take the drive to Tanya. Okay?
182
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Alright!
183
00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:28,225
Brother!
184
00:09:28,267 --> 00:09:30,961
Don't let me down.
185
00:09:31,003 --> 00:09:33,831
Ace, you gotta start paying me for this shit, man.
186
00:09:33,873 --> 00:09:36,000
I'm tired of working for your ass for free.
187
00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:37,669
All this undercover shit I ain't no cop.
188
00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:39,236
You owe me like 20 drinks.
189
00:09:39,278 --> 00:09:43,541
(♪)
190
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,442
She probably came to Frick's trailer.
191
00:09:45,484 --> 00:09:47,545
Just got here myself.
192
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:50,314
I'll go check it out and let you know.
193
00:09:50,356 --> 00:09:52,850
Don’t forget to tell me if you
get a match on those prints.
194
00:09:52,892 --> 00:09:53,492
(♪)
195
00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:01,792
(♪, door slam)
196
00:10:01,834 --> 00:10:05,729
(♪)
197
00:10:05,771 --> 00:10:06,411
(♪, digging)
198
00:10:27,860 --> 00:10:30,120
Hey... Yeah...
199
00:10:30,162 --> 00:10:31,889
Did you get 'em?
200
00:10:31,931 --> 00:10:33,891
Good!
201
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:35,359
Alright! Get here quick.
202
00:10:35,401 --> 00:10:36,527
Bye!
203
00:10:36,569 --> 00:10:39,863
(digging)
204
00:10:39,905 --> 00:10:42,499
Babe!
205
00:10:42,541 --> 00:10:44,335
All that flogging really did me in, OK?
206
00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:45,102
(Spanish)
207
00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:46,704
I'm fucking sore.
208
00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:48,138
You're the brawn.
209
00:10:48,180 --> 00:10:50,908
I'm the brains... and the beauty!
210
00:10:50,950 --> 00:10:54,411
But we dug like 12 fucking
holes and found 12 cat graves.
211
00:10:54,453 --> 00:10:56,747
Yeah well, I'm pretty sure
that last one was a possum, but
212
00:10:56,789 --> 00:10:59,183
this has got to be the right spot.
213
00:10:59,225 --> 00:11:01,151
(thud)
214
00:11:01,193 --> 00:11:01,833
(laughter)
215
00:11:08,034 --> 00:11:12,271
Jackpot, baby!
216
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:13,397
(Spanish)
217
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:15,799
I don't know how to open it.
218
00:11:15,841 --> 00:11:18,469
How much cash?
219
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:21,781
There's no cash.
220
00:11:21,847 --> 00:11:26,377
Puzzles! Maps! What in the actual fuck!
221
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:29,580
(♪) Got me on some old Inspector Gadget shit.
222
00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:32,082
Ace knows I'm gonna be the first one to get arrested.
223
00:11:32,124 --> 00:11:35,561
If anything goes down, they're
going to get the black guy.
224
00:11:35,661 --> 00:11:36,553
They going to get the black-
225
00:11:36,595 --> 00:11:39,189
Oh, yeah. There he is.
226
00:11:39,231 --> 00:11:40,090
There he is.
227
00:11:40,132 --> 00:11:42,326
Deucy-Goosey!
228
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:43,827
“The cat is in the bag!”
229
00:11:43,869 --> 00:11:45,195
(♪, laughter)
230
00:11:45,237 --> 00:11:49,709
Say that to Ace when I see him. “That cat is in the bag!”
231
00:11:49,775 --> 00:11:50,734
I knew it.
232
00:11:50,776 --> 00:11:52,202
There you are.
233
00:11:52,244 --> 00:11:54,304
Oh, you.
234
00:11:54,346 --> 00:11:55,973
You can't hide from me.
235
00:11:56,015 --> 00:11:57,074
I smell you.
236
00:11:57,116 --> 00:12:00,110
I smell your incompetence, I smell your weakness.
237
00:12:00,152 --> 00:12:03,589
I smell you very tiny balls all the way from here.
238
00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:04,581
Ha ha.
239
00:12:04,623 --> 00:12:06,984
I got you.
240
00:12:07,026 --> 00:12:15,026
(crickets, muffled talking)
241
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:18,370
What's the situation?
242
00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:20,330
Well... so far, they've just
243
00:12:20,372 --> 00:12:24,343
found a bunch of boxes filled with maps and puzzles.
244
00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:28,748
I think Frick geocached his cash.
245
00:12:28,814 --> 00:12:30,340
Geocache?
246
00:12:30,382 --> 00:12:31,041
Yeah.
247
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:34,445
It’s an outdoor recreational activity
where people use navigational techniques
248
00:12:34,487 --> 00:12:36,747
to find empty boxes.
249
00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:39,049
Sounds stupid.
250
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:41,518
Yeah... Totally.
251
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,353
I mean, I’d ride with you if you ever want to try it out.
252
00:12:43,395 --> 00:12:44,455
Sure I'm free Friday.
253
00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:45,689
Yeah, Sounds good.
254
00:12:45,731 --> 00:12:48,534
Yeah.
255
00:12:50,002 --> 00:12:53,639
I wonder where that Chastity went.
256
00:12:54,807 --> 00:12:56,433
Found her.
257
00:12:56,475 --> 00:12:58,711
I don't see her.
258
00:13:02,248 --> 00:13:05,008
Well, look what the cat dragged in.
259
00:13:05,050 --> 00:13:09,221
I should have known that you'd show up
after asking all the squirrely questions.
260
00:13:09,288 --> 00:13:10,948
Well, it wasn't hard to figure out.
261
00:13:10,990 --> 00:13:13,951
You had motive, wanting Frick’s money.
262
00:13:13,993 --> 00:13:16,920
Everybody wanted Frick dead for screwing them.
263
00:13:16,962 --> 00:13:19,289
Even Roscoe wanted him dead too.
264
00:13:19,331 --> 00:13:22,292
Poor Roscoe didn't even know
there was a body in his truck.
265
00:13:22,334 --> 00:13:26,472
Practically threw a Frozen Frick
at our feet at the storage facility.
266
00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:27,765
Yeah, and you had access,
267
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:30,901
you had motive, and you had a helper
268
00:13:30,943 --> 00:13:35,272
strong enough to pile drive Frick's
head through his shoulder blades.
269
00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:36,974
Poppy! Poppy! She made me do it.
270
00:13:37,016 --> 00:13:38,684
(thud) Aye!
271
00:13:38,784 --> 00:13:43,280
Look... All we did is dig some
holes at a dead man’s trailer.
272
00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:45,182
We've done nothing illegal.
273
00:13:45,224 --> 00:13:47,317
Worst we did is tresspassin'.
274
00:13:47,359 --> 00:13:48,318
Wrong!
275
00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:55,259
Your fingerprints matches the ones that we found on
the canvas and duct tape used to wrap Frick's body up.
276
00:13:55,301 --> 00:13:57,636
Where'd you get our fingerprints?
277
00:13:57,770 --> 00:13:59,329
Swinging Dickies
278
00:13:59,371 --> 00:14:01,431
Yours from the drinking glass.
279
00:14:01,473 --> 00:14:04,601
And you is all over the pole.
280
00:14:04,643 --> 00:14:05,536
Don't touch me, son.
281
00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:09,114
I don't want your gross ass hands on me.
282
00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:12,451
Well, duh,
283
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:13,644
You got us.
284
00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:15,379
(chuckles)
285
00:14:15,421 --> 00:14:16,880
But unfortunately for you,
286
00:14:16,922 --> 00:14:19,225
I still got the gun.
287
00:14:21,961 --> 00:14:24,655
I left it in the car.
288
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:29,301
Look, I've been in the slammer
and I ain't going back. Okay?
289
00:14:29,401 --> 00:14:31,762
Certainly not for you two idiots.
290
00:14:31,804 --> 00:14:38,235
And certainly because I can frame my
dumb ass, impotent ex-boyfriend Roscoe.
291
00:14:38,277 --> 00:14:40,170
(shotgun click)
292
00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:41,238
(thud)
293
00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:42,773
(♪) Uh! Baby!
294
00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:43,816
(thud)
295
00:14:43,949 --> 00:14:46,877
That's what you get for breaking my brother's heart.
296
00:14:46,919 --> 00:14:48,420
Roscoe?
297
00:14:48,487 --> 00:14:50,447
No, I'm his brother, Marvin.
298
00:14:50,489 --> 00:14:52,449
So you bashed over the head
for breaking your brother's heart?
299
00:14:52,491 --> 00:14:53,483
Heck, yeah.
300
00:14:53,525 --> 00:14:55,686
And not for the framing him for murder part?
301
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,864
Well, that too.
302
00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:00,390
Come on, Deputy.
303
00:15:00,432 --> 00:15:02,125
I'll help you get these two to the car.
304
00:15:02,167 --> 00:15:04,394
I'll go take pictures of those maps.
305
00:15:04,436 --> 00:15:06,797
Thanks, Marvin.
306
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:11,977
Oh, she smells like cigarettes and cheese.
307
00:15:12,044 --> 00:15:13,604
I wouldn’t know.
308
00:15:13,646 --> 00:15:16,306
Lost my sense of smell in the second grade.
309
00:15:16,348 --> 00:15:18,742
It all started with milk.
310
00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:21,820
(♪)
311
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:24,448
Hey man, you really going fly that over your ex's?
312
00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:27,317
Mission confirmed!
313
00:15:27,359 --> 00:15:30,320
Tonight... We fly!
314
00:15:30,362 --> 00:15:33,023
Yo yo, look, you better be
careful with that thing, alright!
315
00:15:33,065 --> 00:15:35,158
If you get arrested or something, don't say my name.
316
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:37,160
(♪)
317
00:15:37,202 --> 00:15:38,428
You're not Ace!
318
00:15:38,470 --> 00:15:42,299
Oh, I knew you weren't Ace... the whole time.
319
00:15:42,341 --> 00:15:46,503
Man, you full of shit. You don't know
nuthin. Come in with all that hot air.
320
00:15:46,545 --> 00:15:50,916
You guys are such amateurs.
321
00:15:52,685 --> 00:15:53,710
Can I get a drink?
322
00:15:53,752 --> 00:15:55,187
Please.
323
00:15:56,155 --> 00:15:58,324
Like something?
324
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:00,951
Damn!
325
00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:04,630
I don't see Ace.
326
00:16:04,697 --> 00:16:06,732
Nope! He's not here.
327
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:09,893
Oh, she is one...
328
00:16:09,935 --> 00:16:11,470
Spicy jalapeno?
329
00:16:11,570 --> 00:16:12,170
(♪)
330
00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:19,236
I'm just going to wait here.
331
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:21,471
Oh! There he is.
332
00:16:21,513 --> 00:16:29,513
Hey yo, Ace! Deuce is here.
333
00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:33,750
Good!
He can hear the big news.
334
00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:34,618
What news?
335
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:37,930
Another wall hole was discovered... Lame.
336
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:43,068
No. It's about the biggest
crime in the town's recent history.
337
00:16:43,302 --> 00:16:44,795
Hold it right there!
338
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,797
This is official town business.
339
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:50,342
And as the executive official,
I'm making the announcement.
340
00:16:50,409 --> 00:16:51,501
Move!
341
00:16:51,543 --> 00:16:52,277
(record scratch)
342
00:16:52,745 --> 00:16:53,503
(clears throat)
343
00:16:53,545 --> 00:16:58,008
My office has just been
contacted by the Dirty Neck PD
344
00:16:58,050 --> 00:17:01,078
to inform me that two
individuals have been arrested
345
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:05,082
with conclusive evidence
in the murder of Friar Frick.
346
00:17:05,124 --> 00:17:06,583
(crowd mutters)
347
00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:09,386
Furthermore, the statements,
348
00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:11,830
from the arrested individuals,
349
00:17:11,897 --> 00:17:18,862
corroborated by information
from our local newspaper reporter,
350
00:17:18,904 --> 00:17:21,198
Mr. Aesop Anderson!
351
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,567
Flori-Dude! Flori-Dude!
352
00:17:23,609 --> 00:17:25,135
All right!
353
00:17:25,177 --> 00:17:26,336
Flori-Dude! Flori-Dude!
354
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:29,039
All right!
355
00:17:29,081 --> 00:17:32,785
All of this has led us to exonerate one...
356
00:17:32,851 --> 00:17:35,045
Roscoe Abernathy from this crime.
357
00:17:35,087 --> 00:17:35,912
That is all.
358
00:17:35,954 --> 00:17:37,014
I need a drink.
359
00:17:37,056 --> 00:17:40,851
(record scratch, ♪)
360
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:42,452
You did it!
361
00:17:42,494 --> 00:17:44,054
I can't thank you enough.
362
00:17:44,096 --> 00:17:46,556
Well, thank you for your tips and your guidance.
363
00:17:46,598 --> 00:17:49,059
But ah, next time, just text me.
364
00:17:49,101 --> 00:17:51,670
Deal!
365
00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:55,332
Hey ah, I got to get out of town and
head back to my business up north.
366
00:17:55,374 --> 00:17:57,134
Hey, do you know how to get a hold of Roscoe
367
00:17:57,176 --> 00:17:58,869
so I can let him know he's a free man?
368
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,504
Already done.
369
00:18:00,546 --> 00:18:02,372
He'll be here soon.
370
00:18:02,414 --> 00:18:04,841
(♪)
371
00:18:04,883 --> 00:18:05,909
So what!
372
00:18:05,951 --> 00:18:07,444
Big deal! Okay!
373
00:18:07,486 --> 00:18:09,513
Even a dog gets his balls licked every once in a while,
374
00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:13,258
by the cat living down the street.
375
00:18:13,325 --> 00:18:15,919
Anyway... what I'm trying to say is, it doesn't matter,
376
00:18:15,961 --> 00:18:19,765
because I filmed the whole thing
and I uploaded it to my website first.
377
00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:20,490
Bullshit!
378
00:18:20,532 --> 00:18:22,192
Yeah! No, it's true. It's true!
379
00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:27,097
I used a Deepfake app and I replaced you with me!
380
00:18:27,139 --> 00:18:30,333
Where you going?
381
00:18:30,375 --> 00:18:31,243
(phone alert)
382
00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:35,172
You might want to check that message there, Deuce.
383
00:18:35,214 --> 00:18:36,306
Whatever!
384
00:18:36,348 --> 00:18:40,010
(♪)
385
00:18:40,052 --> 00:18:41,353
Captain's log!
386
00:18:41,420 --> 00:18:46,391
Day 5 of Project Dirty Neck Takeover.
387
00:18:46,458 --> 00:18:47,818
Oh!
388
00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:49,286
Everyone in this Town
389
00:18:49,328 --> 00:18:50,854
is so fuckin stupid.
390
00:18:50,896 --> 00:18:53,899
I've never met a dummer,
bunch of stupid people in my life.
391
00:18:54,032 --> 00:18:55,826
Anyway, what I'm tryin to say is
392
00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:58,028
I've got this entire town on surveillance.
393
00:18:58,070 --> 00:18:59,896
I got dirt on everybody.
394
00:18:59,938 --> 00:19:01,665
Duece... Out!
395
00:19:01,707 --> 00:19:03,433
Oh, that's, that’s...
396
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:05,302
OH!
397
00:19:05,344 --> 00:19:08,638
(mumbling) Don't forget to edit this part out.
398
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,574
Oh, no.
399
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:12,609
How did you guys?
400
00:19:12,651 --> 00:19:13,510
(crying out loud)
401
00:19:13,552 --> 00:19:16,889
Leaking.
402
00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:18,949
It's o... It’s okay.
It's okay.
403
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,051
No, no, no, no, no. It's okay.
404
00:19:21,093 --> 00:19:22,619
Oh, this is bad.
405
00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:23,820
This is bad.
406
00:19:23,862 --> 00:19:26,323
This is really bad.
407
00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:27,591
This is a lot of fun.
408
00:19:27,633 --> 00:19:29,693
I don't like this!
409
00:19:29,735 --> 00:19:32,162
(♪, record scratch, shotgun click) WHERE IS HE?
410
00:19:32,204 --> 00:19:33,029
SHIT!
411
00:19:33,071 --> 00:19:38,301
I recognize my peeling house taped! THIS
MOTHERFUCKER WAS TAKING VIDEOS OF ME!
412
00:19:38,343 --> 00:19:40,537
I have to ask you to put the gun down now and
413
00:19:40,579 --> 00:19:42,839
let the professionals handle this.
414
00:19:42,881 --> 00:19:43,673
Thank you!
415
00:19:43,715 --> 00:19:44,708
Thank, thank...
416
00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:47,753
Looks like Project Dirty Neck Takeover is over.
417
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,614
Oh, no! But, we shared tots.
418
00:19:50,656 --> 00:19:51,748
No more tots for you.
419
00:19:51,790 --> 00:19:53,550
But those were my personal files.
420
00:19:53,592 --> 00:19:55,018
That's not right.
421
00:19:55,060 --> 00:19:58,021
That, my friend, is how you do it.
422
00:19:58,063 --> 00:20:00,790
You don't wait for the story.
423
00:20:00,832 --> 00:20:04,002
You got to have the balls to make the story.
424
00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:09,933
And this, is just the tip of the iceberg.
425
00:20:09,975 --> 00:20:11,101
Did you hear her?
426
00:20:11,143 --> 00:20:14,137
Now, that is illegal!
427
00:20:14,179 --> 00:20:16,139
Hear what?
428
00:20:16,181 --> 00:20:18,408
Here's the drive, Douchebag!
429
00:20:18,450 --> 00:20:20,877
You can take it, but you need to get lost.
430
00:20:20,919 --> 00:20:26,592
And don't ever set foot, in my town, again.
431
00:20:26,658 --> 00:20:30,820
Mmm!
432
00:20:30,862 --> 00:20:33,223
(grunts)
433
00:20:33,265 --> 00:20:34,424
You made copies, right?
434
00:20:34,466 --> 00:20:35,258
Of course!
435
00:20:35,300 --> 00:20:36,193
(drone whirring)
436
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:38,428
(drone whirring) Wow! That thing really works.
437
00:20:38,470 --> 00:20:39,196
(chuckles)
438
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,831
Hey, look here... I can see your bald spot.
439
00:20:41,873 --> 00:20:42,899
Stop! Stop that.
440
00:20:42,941 --> 00:20:47,137
(drone whirring)
441
00:20:47,179 --> 00:20:48,772
You know what! (♪)
442
00:20:48,814 --> 00:20:51,274
FUCK YOU!
443
00:20:51,316 --> 00:20:52,451
And FUCK YOU!
444
00:20:52,618 --> 00:20:53,610
And FUCK YOU!
445
00:20:53,652 --> 00:20:55,879
FUCK YOU! and FUCK YOU! and FUCK YOU! and FUCK
446
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:58,682
FUCK ALL OF YOU! In this cesspool of a town.
447
00:20:58,724 --> 00:21:00,050
You know what, I don't care.
448
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,952
I'm not going anywhere.
449
00:21:01,994 --> 00:21:03,920
No. I have so much dirt on all of you.
450
00:21:03,962 --> 00:21:06,456
I have stories for years and years and years to come.
451
00:21:06,498 --> 00:21:09,092
Why would I leave this little
shithole of dysfunction? Huh!
452
00:21:09,134 --> 00:21:13,972
Hey, I will not have you disparaging
my shithole of dysfunction.
453
00:21:14,072 --> 00:21:15,832
(♪) You know what, Mr. Mayor?
454
00:21:15,874 --> 00:21:22,672
You! All of you... Can kiss my big city ass!
455
00:21:22,714 --> 00:21:23,807
(crowd gasps)
456
00:21:23,849 --> 00:21:25,008
(Duece chuckles)
457
00:21:25,050 --> 00:21:27,711
- Gimme that!! - No, no. - Mine!
458
00:21:27,753 --> 00:21:29,813
(laughter, drone whirring)
459
00:21:29,855 --> 00:21:31,414
(drone whirring) You like that? Huh?
460
00:21:31,456 --> 00:21:32,949
(crowd gasps) You like that Ace?
461
00:21:32,991 --> 00:21:33,683
Yeah! (drone whirring)
462
00:21:33,725 --> 00:21:35,785
See, you gotta be willing to let it all hang out.
463
00:21:35,827 --> 00:21:39,222
(grunting) You gotta be willing, you
gotta be tough, you gotta be strong.
464
00:21:39,264 --> 00:21:40,457
(drone whirring, screams) OHHHHHH!
465
00:21:40,499 --> 00:21:42,525
(crash, liquid splatter)
466
00:21:42,567 --> 00:21:45,528
(keys hitting the floor)
(chuckling)
467
00:21:45,570 --> 00:21:49,408
(♪)
468
00:21:49,474 --> 00:21:52,778
I told you to keep them off my desk.
469
00:21:52,844 --> 00:21:55,839
(thud, screams) AARGGH!
470
00:21:55,881 --> 00:21:56,481
(♪)
471
00:22:03,422 --> 00:22:06,216
You owe me 20 bucks.
472
00:22:06,258 --> 00:22:08,018
Totally worth it.
473
00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:09,594
(chuckles)
474
00:22:09,761 --> 00:22:11,788
Why is it so moist?
475
00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:16,468
In celebration of tonight's
glorious castration, drinks are on me.
476
00:22:16,535 --> 00:22:18,762
(crowd cheers)
477
00:22:18,804 --> 00:22:21,364
Should I pay from the bribes from last quarter?
478
00:22:21,406 --> 00:22:24,134
No way! My wife wants a boat.
479
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:27,779
You know... take them out of the
donations of the Out-to-Pasture Meadows.
480
00:22:27,846 --> 00:22:28,972
They wouldn't enjoy it anyway.
481
00:22:29,014 --> 00:22:30,507
(laughter)
482
00:22:30,549 --> 00:22:32,575
(♪)
483
00:22:32,617 --> 00:22:34,778
Back on top, right?
484
00:22:34,820 --> 00:22:36,413
Thanks to...
485
00:22:36,455 --> 00:22:37,347
my partner!
486
00:22:37,389 --> 00:22:39,316
Ahhh right then!
487
00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:43,720
(♪)
488
00:22:43,762 --> 00:22:48,058
My brother said that there's a celebration going on.
489
00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:50,226
Hey! How you doing, Roscoe?
490
00:22:50,268 --> 00:22:54,497
Listen, I'd love to interview you,
uh, maybe we could set up a time...
491
00:22:54,539 --> 00:22:58,268
(♪) Whoa! I love this song!
492
00:22:58,310 --> 00:23:00,770
(♪) Oh give me land,
493
00:23:00,812 --> 00:23:04,908
(♪) lots of land under starry skies above,
494
00:23:04,950 --> 00:23:07,811
(♪) don't fence me in...
495
00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:12,215
(♪) Let me ride through the
wide open country that I love,
496
00:23:12,257 --> 00:23:16,161
(♪) don't fence me in...
497
00:23:16,261 --> 00:23:18,355
(♪) Let me be by myself
498
00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:22,092
(♪) in the evening breeze, listen to the rhythm,
499
00:23:22,134 --> 00:23:26,696
(♪) of the cottonwood trees. Send me off forever,
500
00:23:26,738 --> 00:23:32,344
(♪) but I ask you please... Don't fence me in.
501
00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:35,338
So Deuce dropped a deuce.
502
00:23:35,380 --> 00:23:38,950
Just not the typical deuce when
pants are down to your ankles.
503
00:23:39,050 --> 00:23:43,255
I wouldn't believe it could happen
until I saw it with my own two eyes,
504
00:23:43,321 --> 00:23:46,658
until I close them to avoid the blood splatter.
505
00:23:46,725 --> 00:23:51,930
And with Tanya's promise fulfilled,
with us dropping a Deuce of our own,
506
00:23:51,997 --> 00:23:54,891
the mayor was happier than a pig in shit,
507
00:23:54,933 --> 00:23:58,603
which, when referring to Florida
politicians, is quite redundant.
508
00:23:58,703 --> 00:24:00,797
So, what happened to our neutered nut-job?
509
00:24:00,839 --> 00:24:03,842
Well, you heard that time heals all wounds.
510
00:24:03,942 --> 00:24:07,170
That is, if you don't continue to pick at the scabs.
511
00:24:07,212 --> 00:24:11,183
He's going to need one of those,
dog neck cones fitted around his nads.
512
00:24:11,283 --> 00:24:15,787
And Roscoe got his truck back from
the impound, and is back in business.
513
00:24:15,854 --> 00:24:18,248
Let's just hope he cleans that chiller
514
00:24:18,290 --> 00:24:20,150
Real good.
515
00:24:20,192 --> 00:24:23,119
And, speaking about chilling, our booty bumping,
516
00:24:23,161 --> 00:24:27,065
star crossed lovers get to chill in the slammer.
517
00:24:27,132 --> 00:24:28,958
After digging all those holes,
518
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:33,138
Frick's stash is still nowhere to be found... Yet.
519
00:24:33,238 --> 00:24:36,241
But, perhaps that's the next story.
520
00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:38,735
Aesop out!
521
00:24:38,777 --> 00:24:39,377
(♪)
36034
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