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Narrator: EINSTEIN DREAM, TAKE ONE.

THERE WAS A GLOBAL CAMPAIGN

TO FIND THE CURE FOR JET LAG

AND ALL OF HISTORY'S GREATEST-- NO, WAIT, STOP STOP STOP.

I LOST MY PLACE. ( chuckles )

THESE MORNING SHOOTS ARE KILLING ME,

KILLING ME. ( chuckles )

ALL RIGHT. ONE MORE TIME.

EINSTEIN DREAM, TAKE TWO.

THERE WAS A GLOBAL CAMPAIGN

TO FIND THE CURE FOR JET LAG

AND ALL OF HISTORY'S GREATEST SCIENTISTS WERE WORKING ON IT--

NEWTON,

EINSTEIN, COPERNICUS,

EDISON, ALEXANDER GRAHAM BELL,

EVEN JONAS SALK.

AND THEY WERE GATHERED AT A CONVENTION

IN ALEXANDRIA, EGYPT.

THERE WERE LOTS OF CAMERAS AND REPORTERS AROUND

FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD

AND EVERYONE WAS ESPECIALLY EXCITED TO HEAR FROM EINSTEIN

WHO WAS SCHEDULED TO SPEAK LAST.

NOW SOMEHOW I WAS IN THE AUDIENCE TOO.

MY GRANDFATHER-- MY MOTHER'S FATHER--

SOMEHOW USED HIS CONNECTIONS TO GET ME IN--

AT LEAST I THINK SO.

FINALLY, EINSTEIN GOT UP ON THE STAGE AND SAID,

"THERE IS NO CURE FOR JET LAG. YOU JUST SUFFER."

NOW I DON'T KNOW WHAT GOT INTO ME,

BUT I STOOD UP FROM THE BACK ROW AND SCREAMED,

"BUT PROFESSOR EINSTEIN, WHAT ABOUT SOMEONE

WHO FEELS JET-LAGGED IN THEIR OWN TIME ZONE?"

AND HE SAID, "ALAN--"

AND I WAS SHOCKED. HOW DID HE KNOW MY NAME?

HE SAID, "ALAN, SCIENCE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW

WHY WE SLEEP.

NOW GET OUT OF HERE! GO HOME AND WORK ON YOUR FILM!"

OH, I DON'T WANNA GO TO BED YET.

IT'S BEDTIME AND SLEEP TIME.

NOW PUT THESE THINGS DOWN.

NOW GET UNDER THE COVERS AND OUT WITH THE LIGHTS.

MOM, I'M ALWAYS AWAKE FOR AGES AFTER THE LIGHTS ARE OUT.

OH, DON'T WORRY. YOU'LL FALL ASLEEP RIGHT AWAY.

( kisses )

YOU'LL BE ASLEEP BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

YOU'LL BE ASLEEP BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

YOU'LL BE ASLEEP BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

- BEFORE YOU KNOW IT. - ( switch clicking repeatedly )

( clicking continues )

GOOD NIGHT, SON.

( clock ticking )

Alan: INHALE. ( inhales )

EXHALE. ( exhales )

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. GO TO SLEEP.

FORGET IT. THINK PLEASANT THOUGHTS.

THINK PLEASANT THOUGHTS.

INHALE. ( inhales )

EXHALE. ( exhales )

- ( ticking continues ) - THE BABY IS COMING IN TWO MONTHS.

I'D NEVER CHANGED A DIAPER IN MY LIFE.

DO I WATCH THE BIRTH OR FILM THE BIRTH?

SHOOTING IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR THE FILM,

BUT HOW CAN I WATCH THE BIRTH OF MY CHILD THROUGH A LENS?

JUST RELAX. I'M TOO TIRED TO RELAX.

I'M GONNA BE A ZOMBIE TOMORROW.

I FEEL LIKE A ZOMBIE RIGHT NOW.

WHAT WAS I SAYING?

WHAT IF HE WANTS TO BE AN ECONOMIST LIKE SHARI?

WHAT IF HE BECOMES A DOCTOR? THAT WOULD BE OKAY.

HE COULD GET ME THE LATEST SLEEPING PILLS.

STOP IT, STOP IT. JUST RELAX!

HE'S NOT EVEN BORN YET.

HE'S GOTTA GO TO NURSERY SCHOOL FIRST.

THAT REMINDS ME,

WE HAVE TO GET THE APPLICATIONS EARLY.

NEW YORK CITY NURSERY SCHOOLS ARE REALLY COMPETITIVE.

INHALE. ( inhales )

EXHALE.

( crows )

- ( alarm ringing ) - Alan: OKAY, EVERYBODY,

- RISE AND SHINE. UP AND AT 'EM, TIGER. - ( crowing continues )

- ( alarms ringing ) - EARLY BIRD GETS THE WORM.

( crowing, ringing continues )

EARLY TO BED, EARLY TO RISE,

MAKES EACH OF US HEALTHY, WEALTHY AND WISE.

THAT'S A BUNCH OF CRAP.

THIS IS W.T.I.R.E.D. RADIO IN NEW YORK.

- YOU TALK TO ME IN THE MORNING... - ( pop rock music plays )

...I'LL TELL YOU HOW TIRED I AM.

THE SOUND OF MY VOICE IN THE MORNING USUALLY GIVES IT AWAY--

I'M A TERRIBLE SLEEPER.

EITHER I HAVE TROUBLE FALLING ASLEEP

OR I WAKE UP TOO EARLY AND CAN'T GET BACK TO SLEEP.

THE END RESULT IS THAT I WALK AROUND TIRED ALL DAY.

IT'S LIKE HAVING A PERMANENT COLD,

ONLY WITHOUT THE COUGHING, SNEEZING

AND THE RUNNY NOSE...

( singing along )

( '50s rock music plays )

UNTIL THE NIGHT COMES, THAT IS.

THAT'S WHEN I COME ALIVE,

WHEN I DO MY BEST WORK.

TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, EVERY FILM I'VE EVER MADE,

I'VE MADE AT NIGHT.

YOU MIGHT SAY I'M TRAPPED

BETWEEN THE PART OF ME THAT DOESN'T GET ENOUGH SLEEP

AND THE PART OF ME THAT'S TOO BUSY TO WORRY ABOUT IT.

HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DID YOU GET LAST NIGHT?

EIGHT? SEVEN?

SIX? FIVE?

FOUR? THREE?

TWO? ONE?

NONE?

THE DOCTOR WILL SEE YOU NOW.

- HOW OLD ARE YOU? - I'M 47--

- 48. I'M 48. I'M SORRY, I FORGOT. - 48.

I'M 48. I JUST TURNED 48 TWO MONTHS AGO.

AND YOU'RE MARRIED AND YOU'RE EXPECTING YOUR FIRST CHILD?

- IN APRIL. - AND HOW'S YOUR WIFE DOING?

- KNOCK ON WOOD-- SHE'S DOING FINE. - GREAT.

THE BIRTH OF YOUR CHILD WILL BE A LIFE-CHANGING EXPERIENCE.

- SMOKING? - NEVER BOUGHT A PACK OF CIGARETTES MY WHOLE LIFE.

- HOW ABOUT ALCOHOL? - ONE OR TWO GLASSES,

- THREE OR FOUR TIMES A WEEK. - DO YOU EXERCISE?

- I JUMP ROPE, ACTUALLY. - FOR HOW LONG? THAT'S HARD TO DO.

MINIMUM OF HALF HOUR EVERY TIME I GO.

- WHAT IS YOUR BEST TIME IN THE DAY? - THE NIGHT.

Doctor #2: AND YOU AND YOUR WIFE ARE ON THE SAME SCHEDULE

- OR IS SHE TO BED EARLIER? - I PUT HER TO BED.

I TUCK HER IN, KISS HER GOOD NIGHT.

YOU DON'T WORK IN YOUR BEDROOM,

- YOU DON'T EAT IN YOUR BEDROOM? - NO.

Doctor #4: I HOPE YOU DON'T HAVE TV IN YOUR BEDROOM.

- Alan: I DO, BUT I HARDLY EVER WATCH IT. - YOUR BEDROOM SHOULD BE

JUST FOR SLEEP AND SEX, NOTHING ELSE.

Doctor #3: DO YOU WAKEN MUCH AT NIGHT TO URINATE?

Alan: I'VE LEARNED NOT TO DRINK ANYTHING

A FEW HOURS BEFORE I GO TO SLEEP.

- DO YOU HAVE NIGHTMARES? - HAVEN'T HAD A NIGHTMARE IN A LONG TIME.

DOES ANYBODY EVER TELL YOU YOU LOOK TIRED?

EVERYBODY TELLS ME ALL THE TIME.

Doctor #4: BACK PAIN OR NECK PAIN OR SHOULDER,

OR ANY OTHER MEDICAL CONDITION

- WHICH MIGHT ACCOUNT FOR THIS? - NO.

Doctor #3: HAVE YOU EVER INJURED YOURSELF OR OTHERS IN YOUR SLEEP,

- ACTED OUT A DREAM, THAT YOU KNOW OF? - NEVER, THAT I KNOW OF.

- ...NEVER BEEN HOSPITALIZED AND NEVER HAD A SUICIDAL-- - NEVER.

- NEVER NEVER. - DO YOU EVER FALL ASLEEP IN THE DAYTIME

- WITHOUT WANTING TO? - ONLY MAYBE IN MOVIE THEATERS.

- Doctor #3: DO YOU WALK IN YOUR SLEEP? - NO.

- DO YOU SNORE? - YES.

Doctor #3: HAVE YOU EVER AWAKENED YOURSELF AT NIGHT GASPING FOR AIR?

Alan: NO, BUT I HAVE WOKEN UP SUDDENLY.

Doctor #2: WOULD YOU CHARACTERIZE YOURSELF AS A WORRIER?

- DEFINITELY. - STAND CLOSE TO THE CHAIR.

Doctor #2: SO, IS THERE SOMETHING I HAVEN'T ASKED

THAT WOULD BE ILLUMINATING, THAT'D BE IMPORTANT FOR ME TO KNOW?

Alan: IF YOU SAID, "I CAN TURN YOU FROM A NIGHT PERSON INTO A MORNING PERSON,"

I'M NOT SURE THAT I WOULD WANT TO DO IT.

I'M NOT SURE I'D BE ABLE TO DO IT.

I WONDER IF I'M TOO FAR GONE,

IF I'M WIRED THIS WAY BECAUSE--

- Doctor #2: OH, SO YOU'RE A HOPELESS CASE? - Alan: I DON'T KNOW.

Doctor #2: SO YOU'RE WONDERING.

Alan: I'M WONDERING, I'M WONDERING.

Alan: THOSE ELECTRODES ARE MONITORING MY BRAINWAVES,

MY EYE MOVEMENT, MY HEARTBEAT, MY BREATHING,

THE OXYGEN IN MY BLOOD, THE MUSCLE TONE IN MY CHIN,

MY LEG MOVEMENT.

NOT ONLY THAT, BUT THERE'S A CAMERA ON THE WALL

AND A MICROPHONE HANGING FROM THE CEILING.

THE ONLY THING THEY CAN'T RECORD

IS WHAT'S GOING ON INSIDE MY HEAD.

EVERY NIGHT, WHEN I PUT MY HEAD TO THE PILLOW,

IT'S LIKE AN ADVENTURE.

I NEVER KNOW HOW LONG IT'S GONNA TAKE ME TO SLEEP,

IF I CAN FALL ASLEEP.

BUT WHAT ALWAYS HAPPENS IS THAT MY MIND STARTS TO RACE...

UNCONTROLLABLY.

I DON'T SHUT OFF.

MY BRAIN DOESN'T SHUT OFF

AND I CAN'T CONTROL WHERE IT GOES

OR FOR HOW LONG.

( ballad playing )

SOMETIMES, AS SOON AS MY HEAD HITS THE PILLOW,

I START HEARING MUSIC.

- ( acoustic guitar playing ) - IN SOME CASES, IT'S A SONG

I HEARD THAT DAY ON THE RADIO.

IN SOME CASES, IT'S A SONG I HEARD A MONTH AGO.

- ( various songs play ) - IN OTHER CASES, IT'S A SONG

I HEARD A YEAR AGO.

AND IN SOME CASES IT'S A SONG

I NEVER EVEN THOUGHT I KNEW.

AND THINGS JUST START LOOPING AND LOOPING,

AND THE SONG JUST KEEPS GOING IN MY HEAD

OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

AND I CAN'T GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD.

IN FACT, THERE ARE SOME SONGS--

EVEN SOME ALBUMS-- THAT I'M ACTUALLY AFRAID OF,

BECAUSE I KNOW IF I LISTEN TO THEM DURING THE DAY,

THEY'RE GONNA COME BACK AT NIGHT TO HAUNT ME.

( ballad playing )

THERE'S A SONG, FOR INSTANCE, BY LEONARD COHEN,

"IN MY SECRET LIFE"--

IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, ALL I KEEP THINKING

IN THE SAME RHYTHM, IN THE SAME MELODY--

"IN MY SLEEPLESS NIGHT..."

IT JUST REPEATS OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN--

"IN MY SLEEPLESS NIGHT."

WHAT IS-- WHAT'S GOING ON?

Doctor #5: THAT'S A RUMINATION--

CHEWING ON SOMETHING AND BEING UNABLE TO LET IT GO.

Alan: HOW DO I SHUT ALL THAT OFF?

WHAT YOU'RE DESCRIBING IS BASICALLY A ROUTINE THAT YOU'VE LEARNED

AND IT'S PROBABLY TAKEN A LONG TIME

TO DEVELOP TO THIS PARTICULAR STATE.

SO WHAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT ABOUT THAT IS, THERE CAN BE AN "OFF" SWITCH,

BUT YOU GOTTA LEARN HOW TO TURN IT OFF.

IT'S NOT LIKE WE CAN JUST GIVE YOU ONE AND SAY,

"THERE IT IS ON THE WALL. FLIP THIS SWITCH. YOU'RE OFF TONIGHT."

Alan: OVER THE YEARS, I'VE TRIED TO CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP,

TO DRINK MYSELF TO SLEEP, AROMATHERAPY,

CHANGING MATTRESSES, CHANGING PILLOWS,

LAVENDER BEADS, MASSAGE THERAPY,

WHITE NOISE, MEDITATION, COUNTING SHEEP.

- DID THE SHEEP WORK? - NO. NO, I LOSE INTEREST AFTER A COUPLE OF HUNDRED.

A COUPLE OF HUNDRED?

Alan: MELATONIN, VALERIAN ROOT,

ACUPUNCTURE, ACUPRESSURE, CHAMOMILE TEA,

WARM MILK, HYPNOSIS EVEN,

YOGA, HOMEOPATHIC MEDICINES, MARIJUANA,

- LOTS OF SEX BEFORE I GO TO SLEEP-- - HAVE YOU MENTIONED HOT BATHS?

- HOT BATHS. - WAKE ME WHEN HE'S DONE.

- ( mother laughs ) - HERBAL TEAS,

- BIOFEEDBACK-- - OKAY, SO NOTHING WORKED, NOTHING WORKED.

I'VE BEEN TIRED MY WHOLE LIFE.

MAYBE SOME OF MY INSOMNIA IS RELATED

TO BAD SLEEP HABITS FROM INFANCY.

- Lynn: MAYBE. - OH, THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD BAD SLEEP HABITS

IN INFANCY AND END UP SLEEPING WELL.

I THINK SO MUCH OF IT HAS TO DO WITH...

HOW LONG HE'S BEEN MAKING FILMS

AND MAKING THEM AT FUNKY HOURS OF THE NIGHT.

Mother: I REMEMBER, ALAN-- 4:00 IN THE MORNING

- AND YOU USED TO GO UPSTAIRS TO GO TO SLEEP. - AND IT'S OVER 20 YEARS.

- RIGHT. - AND WE COULDN'T CALL IN UNTIL 11:00 OR 12:00.

- SO WHAT IS THAT? DO YOU THINK THAT'S NORMAL? - Lynn: RIGHT.

EVEN BY YOUR STANDARDS OF NORMAL?

( mother laughs )

- SO I JUST WANT TO ASK YOU-- - Mother: HMM?

WHAT KIND OF SLEEPER WAS I AS A BABY?

- WOULD YOU SAY I WAS A GOOD SLEEPER? - Lynn: CAN YOU REMEMBER?

- I'M NOT THAT OLD, LYNN. - OKAY.

- OF COURSE I CAN REMEMBER. - Alan: DID YOU READ BOOKS ABOUT SLEEP?

Mother: NO, I DIDN'T THINK I HAD A PROBLEM WITH YOU.

Lynn: ALAN, MOST PEOPLE DON'T THINK ABOUT IT.

IT'S ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS.

I USED TO COME AND SING YOU A LULLABY--

A FRENCH SONG-- RUB YOUR BACK

AND THE NEXT THING I KNEW, YOU WERE SLEEPING.

WHAT WAS THE LULLABY YOU SANG ME?

( singing in French )

- THAT'S THE ONE. - THAT'S ONLY TWO LINES.

- ( Lynn chuckles ) - ALAN, YOU DIDN'T BRING ME HERE FOR SINGING.

Alan: I HAVE A QUESTION-- DO YOU COUNT SHEEP?

- NO, NEVER. - Alan: YOU'VE NEVER COUNTED SHEEP IN YOUR WHOLE LIFE?

I DID, BUT YOU TOLD ME I WAS DOING SOMETHING WRONG.

- Alan: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? - YOU SAID I SHOULD SAY "SHEEP"

AFTER EACH ONE-- "ONE SHEEP," "TWO SHEEP,"

- AND I-- - THAT'S HOW I DO IT.

NO. AND I JUST COUNTED AND I SEE THEM GOING

- UP A PRAIRIE, YOU KNOW... - ( Alan chuckles )

- ...JUMPING. - SO YOU SAY "ONE"

- AND THEN IMAGINE THE SHEEP JUMPING. - Mother: RIGHT.

- THEN YOU SAY "TWO" AND VISUALIZE THE SHEEP-- - RIGHT.

- Lynn: YOU TOLD HER SHE WAS DOING IT INCORRECTLY. - Mother: YES.

Lynn: HOW CAN YOU COUNT SHEEP INCORRECTLY?

- Woman: YOU COULD BE COUNTING ANYTHING. - Lynn: BUT SHE VISUALIZED IT.

- WHAT DIFFERENCE DID IT MAKE? - WHICH IS THE RIGHT WAY TO DO IT?

- BOTH. - Alan's voice: ONE, TWO...

Doctor #5: IT WORKS BECAUSE IT GETS YOU FOCUSED ON SOMETHING MENTALLY,

- BESIDES THE WORRY OR THE OTHER STUFF. - ( continues counting )

SO WHETHER IT'S JUST THE NUMBERS

OR THERE'S AN IMAGE ASSOCIATED WITH IT,

YOU'RE FOCUSING ON SOMETHING PARTICULAR.

- Alan: WHY SHEEP? - Doctor #5: I DON'T KNOW WHERE THE SHEEP CAME FROM,

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? IF SOMETHING ELSE WORKS FOR YOU,

THAT'S GOOD TOO.

Alan's voice: ...142, 143, 144...

173, 174,

175, 176...

225, 226, 227...

- 289, 290... - ( Alan mimicking pounding )

Alan: SOME NIGHTS WHEN I HIT THE PILLOW,

- ALL I HEAR IS POUNDING. - Alan's voice: 293...

( continues mimicking )

Doctor #5: YOU'RE POUNDING, SURE.

SOMETIMES IT FEELS LIKE THERE IS A WOODPECKER UNDER MY PILLOW.

- Doctor #3: THAT'S COOL. - Alan: IT'S NOT SO COOL. IT DRIVES ME CRAZY.

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? THE CAROTID ARTERY

HAS-- HAS-- IT'S JUST REAL NEAR THE EAR THERE.

AND THAT'S ALL YOU'RE DOING, IS YOU'RE HEARING YOUR OWN PULSE.

IT'S VERY VERY NORMAL. IT'S NOT ABNORMAL.

WELL, WHY DON'T YOU HEAR YOUR CAROTID ARTERY?

I DO. I JUST DON'T PAY ATTENTION TO IT.

Alan: HOW LONG SHOULD IT TAKE ME TO FALL ASLEEP, IDEALLY?

Doctor #3: MOST PEOPLE FALL ASLEEP IN 15 MINUTES OR LESS.

Alan: AND WHAT SHOULD BE GOING THROUGH MY MIND WHEN MY HEAD HITS THE PILLOW?

Doctor #3: THAT YOU LOVE THE WAY THAT PILLOW FEELS,

THAT YOU LOVE THE WAY THAT BED FEELS,

THAT YOU'VE NEVER FELT MORE COMFORTABLE IN YOUR LIFE,

AND THE NEXT THING IS-- NOTHING.

YOU JUST LIE THERE ENJOYING HOW WONDERFUL IT FEELS

JUST TO BE IN THIS BED.

- Alan: THAT SOUNDS LIKE SCIENCE FICTION. - Doctor #2: NO, THAT'S--

YOU ASKED ME WHAT YOU SHOULD FEEL.

THAT'S IT.

IF EVERY NIGHT, NIGHT AFTER NIGHT AFTER NIGHT,

YOU DON'T SLEEP WELL, THEN WHAT HAPPENS IS

THE BEDROOM ITSELF, THE SLEEPING ENVIRONMENT,

- THE WHOLE IDEA OF SLEEP... - Alan: ...FOR ME BECOMES A BATTLEFIELD.

Doctor #3: GOOD SLEEPERS DON'T VIEW SLEEP AS A BATTLEFIELD AT ALL.

GOOD SLEEPERS--

THAT'S THE ESCAPE FROM THE BATTLEFIELD.

Doctor #2: YOU DON'T HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO SLEEP.

IT'S BUILT INTO THE BRAIN

TO EVERY 24 HOURS GO TO SLEEP.

IT'S NATURAL AND EASY AND...

- Alan: ...AND I CAN'T DO IT. - ...AND YOU CAN'T DO IT.

Woman in film: Why can't I go to sleep?

Man on tape: Our subject this evening is sleep, going to sleep.

YOU'RE ALL TIED UP IN KNOTS.

DON'T FIGHT SO HARD.

Man on radio: ...begin by asking you to find

as comfortable a position as you can.

Breathe out the clocks and the calendars.

Breathe out the tensions,

and breathe in the cool comfort.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Now...

walk with me down the stairs.

Gonna walk out into a beautiful garden.

Take one step down,

and then two,

then four--

halfway-- five,

six, seven--

we can almost see that door--

eight, nine.

And then stepping down,

turning a little till we see the door.

( bangs on door )

( dog barks )

Radio announcer: When you can't sleep because tension has you

all... wound... up,

your active mind remembers the pressures

- and the problems of the day. - ( various radio chatter )

You see, active minds bring on

nagging, sleep-robbing thoughts that create sleep static.

WHEN IS YOUR USUAL TIME RETIRING TO BED?

Alan: AS EARLY AS 2:00, AS LATE AS 5:00. IT DEPENDS.

DO YOU WORK RIGHT UP TO THE TIME YOU GO TO SLEEP?

ALL THE TIME. ( laughs )

Alan: FIND OUT WHAT THE WORLD RECORD IS FOR STAYING AWAKE.

- MAKE A LIST OF ALL IDIOMS... - ( overlapping ) FIND OUT HOW MUCH

- PEOPLE SLEPT IN THE VICTORIAN ERA... - ...SLEEP FOUNDATION WEBSITE.

- MAKE A LIST OF WRITERS, POETS... - ...CLOCKS TICKING ALSO.

PAINTERS AND MUSICIANS WHO WERE INSOMNIACS.

FIND OUT WHAT TIME OF THE DAY THE THREE-MILE-ISLAND ACCIDENT HAPPENED.

- SEARCH FOR OUTDOOR CLOCKS... - IS IT TRUE THAT LEONARDO DA VINCI

- ONLY SLEPT 15 MINUTES EVERY FEW HOURS? - FIND OUT ABOUT MEGAN'S LAW...

RESEARCH SLEEP DEPRIVATION AS A FORM OF TORTURE.

SEE IF THERE ARE ANY STUDIES ABOUT THE RELATIONSHIP

- BETWEEN SLEEP AND... - MAKE A LIST OF HOW MUCH EVERY ANIMAL SLEEPS AT NIGHT.

- ...IF SOME CULTURES ARE BETTER SLEEPERS... - MAKE A LIST OF EVERY SONG

- EVER WRITTEN ABOUT INSOMNIA. - AND WHAT ABOUT PLANTS?

Doctor #2: YOU CAN'T JUST GO FROM THIS HIGH-INTENSITY THINKING ABOUT EVERYTHING

AND IMMEDIATELY THINK THAT YOU'RE GONNA GO TO SLEEP.

DOESN'T HAPPEN THAT WAY.

Cinema narrator: The road to sleep can be filled with detours.

Man's voice: NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

Alan: I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT HOW TO FALL ASLEEP.

I FORGOT HOW TO FUCKING FALL ASLEEP.

Man's voice echoing: NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

Alan: IT'S LIKE FORGETTING HOW TO WALK OR BREATHE.

IT'S LIKE THE CLOCK IS LAUGHING AT ME.

GET RID OF THE CLOCK.

ALL IT'S DOING IS FEEDING THAT RUMINATION AND WORRY.

INSTITUTING A REGULAR WIND-DOWN PERIOD,

WHERE YOU READ NON-WORK-RELATED MATERIAL

THAT JUST ALLOWS YOU TO RELAX

AND ENJOY SOME OTHER PART OF LIFE

IS GONNA BE AN IMPORTANT PART OF THIS.

- ALAN, YOU WOKE ME UP AGAIN. - Alan: I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY.

- I DROPPED A BOOK. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ALAN, YOU'RE FILMING ME. GO AWAY.

- SHARI, JUST GO-- I'M SORRY. - ALAN, DON'T-- STOP FILMING ME.

I CAN'T STAND BEING WOKEN UP WITH A LIGHT IN MY EYE.

YOU WAKE ME UP WITH A CAMERA IN MY FACE.

- IT'S NOT ON YOUR FACE. - ALAN, PLEASE, ALAN!

- YOU'RE GONNA BREAK THE CAMERA. STOP IT. - TURN THE CAMERA OFF.

- GO BACK TO SLEEP. - DON'T TELL ME TO GO BACK TO SLEEP.

WHO'S GONNA GO BACK TO SLEEP AFTER I'M PISSED OFF AT YOU?

( sighs )

Alan: WAKING UP AFTER JUST A FEW HOURS OF SLEEP DRIVES ME CRAZY.

Doctor: IS THE AWAKENING ABRUPT? ARE YOU FULLY ALERT

OR YOU JUST SLOWLY COME TO?

Alan: I WOULD SAY I'M AWAKE INSTANTLY.

MY BIG PROBLEM IS GETTING BACK TO SLEEP,

'CAUSE ONCE I'M UP, I'M UP.

Doctor: AND WHAT DO YOU DO?

I SIGH, BASICALLY. ( chuckles )

...AND THEN HEAD FOR THE MEDICINE CABINET.

THE ONLY WAY I CAN PUT THE DRAGON TO SLEEP

IS WITH A SLEEPING PILL.

THAT'S THE ONE THING THAT WORKS CONSISTENTLY.

Doctor: THE SLEEPING PILL IS THE SWORD FOR YOUR DRAGON.

THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT.

AND WHAT'S INTERESTING ABOUT THAT, OF COURSE,

IS YOUR PERCEPTION THAT IT IS A DRAGON.

NOT A PUPPY, IT'S A DRAGON.

IT'S PART OF THIS BATTLE AGAIN.

THE DRAGON IS ME. ( chuckles ) YOU KNOW?

- THE DRAGON IS ME. - Doctor: YES.

YOU SAID IT. I DIDN'T.

Doctor: INSIGHT DOESN'T ALWAYS LEAD TO BEHAVIOR CHANGE, THOUGH.

WHAT YOU NEED TO BE CONSIDERING

IS HOW NOT TO SLAY THE DRAGON BUT TAME THE DRAGON.

Alan: I HAVE A DIRTY LITTLE SECRET I MIGHT AS WELL JUST TELL YOU.

I HAVE BEEN TAKING A SLEEPING PILL

FOR A REALLY LONG TIME.

YOU READ THE BOTTLE, IT SAYS,

"DON'T TAKE MORE THAN A WEEK OR TWO OR THREE."

IT'S A SHORT-TERM THING. I MEAN, I'M...

DON'T BE AFRAID. SAY IT.

- YEARS. - YEARS.

Alan: WHAT EXACTLY IS HAPPENING TO ME

WHEN I'M TAKING THE SLEEPING PILL?

WHAT IS IT DOING TO ME?

Doctor: NOBODY KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT THESE COMPOUNDS ARE DOING.

HOW-- I'M TAKING SOMETHING EVERY DAY,

AND NO ONE KNOWS WHAT IT'S DOING?

OH, THERE ARE ALL KINDS OF MEDICATIONS THEY DON'T KNOW

EXACTLY WHAT THEY'RE DOING,

BUT IT'S MORE SO, PROBABLY,

WITH SLEEP MEDICATIONS.

Announcer: Medical science introduces "Shut-Eye,"

a truly remarkable new sleeping formula

made especially for people with active minds,

minds too busy to sleep.

Doctor: THEY TEND TO BE CLASSES OF DRUGS

WHICH HAVE SOME EFFECT

ON A LOT OF BRAIN CELLS,

STIMULATING A LOT OF PLACES IN THE BRAIN

THAT RELAX YOU,

ONES THAT SHUT THE BRAIN OFF.

AND ONCE YOUR BRAIN IS OFF,

- THEN YOUR REAL SLEEPINESS TAKES OVER... - ( snoring )

- ...AND YOU CAN FALL ASLEEP. - ( continues snoring )

WHAT ARE YOU-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Shari: YOU'RE SNORING AGAIN.

I WAS JUST TRYING TO MOVE YOU, 'CAUSE I CAN'T SLEEP.

- I WAS TRYING TO-- - I'M NOT SNORING THAT LOUD.

( laughs ) YES, YOU ARE.

WELL, NOW YOU'RE NOT. SO IT WORKED.

( snoring )

- Alan: THAT'S WHAT A LOUD SNORE LOOKS LIKE? - Doctor: YEAH.

AND THEN YOU STOP, AND YOU'RE SLOWING YOUR BREATHING DOWN.

- AND THEN-- - ( Alan snoring )

( snoring continues )

Alan: SO IS SNORING BAD FOR ME?

Doctor: WE'RE NOT SURE HOW BENIGN SNORING IS.

IT MAY INCREASE BLOOD PRESSURE.

( snoring continues )

Alan: IF I TOLD YOU THAT THE SNORING'S GOTTEN WORSE

AS THE SLEEPING'S GOTTEN WORSE, WOULD THAT MAKE SENSE?

Doctor: YES. AS PEOPLE GET SLEEP-DEPRIVED,

THE MUSCLE STRENGTH OF THE THROAT GETS WEAKER,

YOUR SNORING GETS WORSE.

IF YOU DRINK ALCOHOL, WHICH WEAKENS THE MUSCLES IN THE THROAT,

YOUR SNORING GETS WORSE.

( snoring )

Alan: IT'S ONE THING TO BE TOLD YOU SNORE.

IT'S SOMETHING ELSE ENTIRELY TO ACTUALLY HEAR IT.

NOW I'M TERRIFIED OF FALLING ASLEEP IN PUBLIC PLACES.

I DON'T WANNA BE THE PERSON SITTING NEXT TO YOU, SNORING LOUDLY,

THE ONE YOU JUST WANNA GRAB BY THE THROAT AND SCREAM,

- "WAKE UP, WAKE UP, WAKE UP!" - ( alarms ringing, buzzing )

"WAKE UP."

( bell rings )

BUT IF YOU ARE SOMEONE WHO SNORES HEAVILY,

YOU MIGHT HAVE A CONDITION CALLED "SLEEP APNEA,"

WHICH CAN BE VERY SERIOUS,

AND YOU SHOULD SEE A DOCTOR.

( rooster crows )

( rooster crowing )

Doctor: WHAT TIME DO YOU GET UP IN THE MORNING?

Alan: DEPENDS ON WHAT TIME I WENT SO SLEEP,

DEPENDS ON IF I WOKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT,

DEPENDS ON IF I TOOK A SLEEPING PILL.

( radio news playing )

Doctor: THE NUMBER ONE RULE OF SLEEP HYGIENE--

GET OUT OF BED AT THE VERY SAME TIME,

REGARDLESS OF WHETHER YOU SLEPT THE WHOLE NIGHT,

WHETHER YOU WENT TO BED AT 4:00,

WHETHER YOU DIDN'T SLEEP AT ALL.

Alan: WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING,

I NEVER REALLY HAVE A FEELING

OF...

WELL, WHATEVER. I DON'T HAVE THE "WHATEVER,"

THE SATISFACTION

OF FEELING WELL-RESTED.

OH BOY, WHAT A SLEEP. ( sighs )

IT IS OCTOBER 15, 1989.

IT'S ABOUT 3:25 IN THE MORNING.

I'M ALWAYS VERY TIRED.

THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT TELL ME,

WHEN I-- "HOW ARE YA?" I SAY I'M TIRED,

AND THEY SAY, "ALAN, AS LONG AS I'VE EVER KNOWN YOU,

THAT'S ALWAYS WHAT YOU SAY. YOU'RE TIRED."

I GET IRRITABLE. I LOSE MY APPETITE,

CAN'T CONCENTRATE. I GET LISTLESS.

I SHY AWAY FROM PEOPLE. I SENSE MY MOOD SHIFTS CAN BE MORE VOLATILE.

I FEEL LIKE SHIT. I YAWN ALL DAY. I LOOK LIKE SHIT.

TOMORROW MORNING MY EYES WILL BE BLOODSHOT,

MY VOICE WILL BE LOW,

MY SYNTAX WILL BE AWKWARD

AND MY THOUGHT PROCESSES,

IF THERE ARE ENOUGH TO BE PLURAL,

WILL BE SORT OF IN SLOW MOTION A LITTLE BIT.

( sighs ) AND WHILE I'M AT IT,

I'D LIKE TO MAKE A PUBLIC APOLOGY.

FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW ME VERY WELL,

MY INSOMNIA'S THE REASON

THAT I'VE NEVER RETURNED YOUR PHONE CALL.

- IT'S THE REASON-- - ( scuffling )

THERE CAN'T BE ANY MOVING AROUND.

I GOTTA JUST CONCENTRATE. IT'S TOO DISTRACTING.

WHAT IS HE GETTING THAT-- WHAT--

JUST SIT IN A PLACE JUST FOR THIS LITTLE BIT.

I CAN'T-- I'M HAVING-- I'M HAVING TROUBLE CONCENTRATING.

IF YOU HAVE TO GET SOMETHING, JUST GET IT.

EVERYONE, SIT DOWN, SIT DOWN. NO ONE--

JUST SIT DOWN.

SOMEONE REFERRED TO SLEEP DEPRIVATION

IN A METAPHOR THAT I THOUGHT

WAS REALLY CREEPY BUT VERY POWERFUL.

THEY SAID, "IF YOU BOIL A FROG SLOWLY,

THE FROG DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING'S WRONG."

( guffaws )

THAT'S KIND OF AN INTERESTING THOUGHT.

THAT'S A GREAT METAPHOR

FOR WHAT SLEEP LOSS DOES TO PEOPLE.

YOU LOSE SLEEP. YOU'RE IN A FOG,

AND THE WORST PERSON TO SAY "HOW'RE YOU FEELING?"

IS THE PERSON IN THE FOG.

AND UNTIL YOU COME OUT OF THE FOG,

YOU DON'T REALIZE HOW BAD OFF YOU REALLY WERE.

SOMETIMES WHEN I'M ON THE STREET, RUNNING ERRANDS,

I FORGET EXACTLY WHAT ERRANDS IT IS I'M RUNNING.

TWO MONTHS AGO I FORGOT TO BRING THE VIDEOTAPE OF MY FILM

TO THE SCREENING OF MY FILM.

News anchor: In New York witnesses say it felt like an earthquake

and sounded like the world was coming to an end.

Without warning, pedestrians on 56th Street

looked up to find themselves under a downpour

of rock, glass and metal, as a crane collapsed.

Alan: I START TO THINK THAT THIS EXPRESSION, "HUMAN ERROR,"

JUST MEANS "FATIGUE," "SLEEPINESS."

SOMEONE WAS TOO TIRED AND DID THE WRONG THING,

SAID THE WRONG THING, PUSHED THE WRONG BUTTON.

Doctor: WE JUST CAN'T FUNCTION WELL

WHEN OUR BODY'S NOT PREPARED TO BE AWAKE.

Alan: SO ILL-SLEPT LEADERS AND PRESIDENTS

COULD MAKE VERY POOR DECISIONS...

LIKE LEADING A COUNTRY TO WAR.

Doctor: ABSOLUTELY.

PRESIDENT CLINTON, IN AN INTERVIEW IN "U.S. NEWS AND WORLD REPORT,"

ACTUALLY ACKNOWLEDGED THAT EVERY MAJOR ERROR HE MADE IN HIS LIFE

HE MADE WHEN HE WAS TIRED.

Alan: THEN IT'S NOT SO FAR-FETCHED TO THINK

THAT SOMETHING LIKE THE WORLD SERIES

COULD BE WON OR LOST BASED ON WHETHER A KEY PLAYER GOT A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP.

Doctor: IN FOOTBALL, BASEBALL AND BASKETBALL, STUDIES HAVE SHOWN

THAT JUST THE DIRECTION YOU FLY AND THE JET LAG

CAN AFFECT WHO WINS THE GAME.

Alan: BY THE WAY, THIS MUSIC THAT I KEEP PLAYING OVER AND OVER AGAIN

COMES FROM A FILM CALLED "THAT UNCERTAIN FEELING,"

DIRECTED BY ERNST LUBITSCH IN 1941.

IT PLAYS OVER THE SHOT OF A WOMAN WHO CAN'T SLEEP,

PACING HER BEDROOM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.

CRITICS CALLED IT LUBITSCH'S WORST FILM.

THE SCORE, HOWEVER, WAS NOMINATED FOR AN OSCAR.

I KNOW IT'S SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME FEEL STRESSFUL,

BUT FOR SOME REASON I FIND IT ODDLY SOOTHING.

Doctor: THE RAPID EYE MOVEMENTS--

HERE'S A BIG ONE.

HERE'S A NICE ONE.

YOU'RE IN SOLID REM SLEEP.

- Alan: I'M DREAMING. - Doctor: YOU'RE DREAMING.

Alan: I FIND MYSELF WALKING AROUND THE CITY

ALL NIGHT, LOOKING TO FIND SOMEONE WHO CAN TELL ME

WHY EVERYONE ELSE KNOWS HOW TO SLEEP

EXCEPT ME.

WHEN MORNING CAME, I FOUND MYSELF

IN A POLICE STATION, LOOKING THROUGH MUG SHOTS.

I GO THROUGH ALL THE MUG SHOTS,

AND THE PHOTOGRAPH THAT I PULL OUT

IS A PHOTOGRAPH OF MY GREAT GRANDFATHER, SOLOMON ISAAC,

WHOM I NEVER MET, OBVIOUSLY, WHO LIVED IN POLAND.

SOMEHOW I NEEDED TO FIND HIM.

MY FATHER TOLD ME THAT THE ONLY WAY I COULD FIND HIM

WAS BY WEARING THIS HELMET, THIS SCUBA HELMET.

THE NEXT THING I KNOW, I'M SWIMMING WITH A SCHOOL OF FISH.

WHICH KIND OF MADE SENSE, BECAUSE I KNOW

THAT HE HAD BEEN A TEACHER IN POLAND.

AND IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT THAT I ASK HIM HOW HE SLEPT.

THAT'S WHY I'VE COME ALL THIS WAY--

TO ASK HIM HOW HE SLEPT.

AND WHEN I FINALLY FOUND HIM,

HE SMILED AT ME

AND SAID IN A REALLY STRONG YIDDISH ACCENT,

"YOU GOT THE WRONG GUY.

I SLEEP WITH THE MOON

AND WAKE WITH THE SUN.

DON'T BLAME ME, YOUNG MAN."

Doctor: YOU DID SAY THAT THERE ARE SOME RELATIVES

WITH SOME INSOMNIA-TYPE PROBLEMS.

Alan: YEAH. ON BOTH SIDES OF MY FAMILY.

IN FACT, ONE OF THE FIRST THINGS I DID WHEN I STARTED THIS FILM

WAS TO LOOK THROUGH ALL OF MY FAMILY HOME MOVIES

FOR SOME KIND OF EVIDENCE OF INSOMNIA OR SLEEPLESSNESS.

ALL I FOUND WAS EVERYONE ACTING FOR THE CAMERA

AS IF THEY'D JUST HAD THREE CUPS OF COFFEE.

WITH ONE EXCEPTION--

A SHOT OF MY GRANDPA JOE,

LOOKING REALLY REALLY TIRED.

Doctor: WAS HIS PROBLEM STAYING UP LATE TOO?

Alan: MY MOTHER AND MY UNCLES NEVER FIGURED OUT

IF HE WAS A NIGHT OWL BECAUSE HE COULDN'T SLEEP

OR WHETHER HE COULDN'T SLEEP BECAUSE HE WAS A NIGHT OWL.

Man: HERE'S A MAN WHO'S BEEN TAKING PILLS FOR 20, 30 YEARS,

AND THE SIZE OF THESE SLEEPING PILLS-- EVERY NIGHT.

Alan's mother: MY FATHER TOOK A LOT OF THINGS VERY PERSONAL--

THE EVENTS OF THE WORLD ON HIS SHOULDERS.

Man #2: WHY THERE ARE WARS, WHY THERE'S FIGHTING,

WHY THERE'S ARGUING, WHY CAN'T PEOPLE LIVE IN PEACE...

Man #3: HE JUST HAD SO MANY THINGS ON HIS MIND...

HE COULDN'T RELAX.

Doctor: AND YOUR FATHER, IS HE LIVING?

Alan: NO, HE DIED IN 2001.

- HOW OLD WAS HE WHEN HE DIED? - JUST SHY OF 84. HE WAS 83.

Doctor: DO YOU REMEMBER IF HE WAS A GOOD SLEEPER?

- HOW ARE YOU FEELING? - HUH?

- HOW YOU FEELING? - I DIDN'T SLEEP LAST NIGHT.

WHY NOT?

SHOOT ME IN THE HEAD. I DIDN'T SLEEP.

ALMOST ALL NIGHT, I DIDN'T SLEEP.

SO I HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF A HEADACHE.

Doctor: THE MOST BASIC LEVEL--

THE AMOUNT OF SLEEP AN INDIVIDUAL NEEDS

IS PROBABLY GENETICALLY DETERMINED.

AND I SAY THAT BECAUSE YOU NEED A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF SLEEP,

AND IT'S NOT LIKE YOU CAN CHANGE THAT.

Alan: SO THE AMOUNT OF SLEEP MY CHILD WILL NEED COULD BE...

( both ) GENETICALLY...

RELATED TO HOW MUCH SLEEP I NEED?

YES. AND YOUR GRANDFATHER, ET CETERA.

BUT, AS YOU KNOW ABOUT GENETICS,

IT'S HOW THOSE GENES ARE EXPRESSED

WITHIN THE ENVIRONMENT.

( mother singing French lullaby )

Alan: REMEMBER I TOLD YOU I USED TO LISTEN TO YOU AND MOMMY FIGHT EVERY NIGHT,

SO I KNEW YOU WERE GOING TO GET DIVORCED WAY BEFORE YOU EVER DID?

Father: I-- I THOUGHT YOU WERE ASLEEP.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE ASLEEP.

- WHY AREN'T YOU IN BED? - UH...

WHAT'S WRONG, BILLY? IS SOMETHING THE MATTER?

Alan: MY PARENTS USED TO FIGHT A LOT.

WELL, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, YOUNG LADY...

Alan: I WOULD GET OUT OF BED

AND HIDE BEHIND A WALL AND LISTEN TO THEM.

I SHOULD HAVE BEEN SLEEPING.

I COULDN'T TELL MY SISTER. SHE WAS TOO YOUNG. I DIDN'T WANT TO UPSET HER.

COULDN'T TELL FAMILY MEMBERS.

BUT THE NIGHT WAS THE TIME

WHEN I WOULD LISTEN...

Father: I THOUGHT YOU WERE ASLEEP.

Alan: ...SNEAK AROUND THE HOUSE AND LISTEN...

( man and woman arguing )

...AND THEN LIE IN BED AND DWELL ON IT.

Doctor: HEARING THINGS AT NIGHT THAT ARE UPSETTING

IS AN ACTIVATING KIND OF TRAINING.

( arguing continues )

CLEARLY, WHATEVER'S HAPPENED

HAS HAD AN EFFECT ON YOU BEING A NIGHT OWL;

ON THE MENTAL RUMINATIONS THAT GO ON AT NIGHT.

Woman yells: WE'RE GETTING A DIVORCE!

Doctor: IT TOOK A LONG TIME TO DEVELOP THE PATTERN YOU NOW LIVE.

MOTHER! MOTHER!

Alan: MORE THAN ONE OF THE DOCTORS SAID

THAT THERE'S A POSSIBILITY

THAT MY ASSOCIATION WITH BEING UP AT NIGHT

AND NOT SLEEPING AND HEARING YOU FIGHT

AND LISTENING TO CONVERSATIONS THAT YOU HAD

IS ONE OF THE REASONS THAT MAYBE I MIGHT BE

NOT SUCH A GOOD SLEEPER, THAT IT'S A DEEP MEMORY SET

- IN WHICH I ASSOCIATE THE NIGHT WITH THAT KIND OF PAIN. - Mother: ALL RIGHT.

- Lynn: BLAME THE MAMA. BLAME THE MAMA - ON THAT SAME--

Lynn: DO YOU THINK IF THEY WEREN'T ARGUING THAT YOU WOULD'VE SLEPT?

Alan: MAYBE THE TWO OF YOU WERE FIGHTING SO MUCH YOU WERE PREOCCUPIED.

WE WEREN'T FIGHTING WHEN YOU WERE EIGHT OR NINE.

- OH, REALLY? ( laughing ) - Lynn: MOM, WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

I KNOW. YOU WERE FIGHTING WHEN WE WERE TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN.

Lynn: RIGHT, YOU JUST STAYED MARRIED WHEN WE WERE EIGHT, NINE, 10.

I MEAN, MA, HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?

A LITTLE REVISING OF HISTORY HERE, I'D SAY.

BUT DO YOU THINK THAT'S WHAT KEPT YOU UP? CAN YOU ANALYZE THAT?

Alan: IT COULD BE. AS SOON AS I PICKED UP

ON WHAT WAS GOING ON BETWEEN MY PARENTS,

I FIXATED ON THAT. THAT'S WHY I'D STAY UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT

TO WATCH YOU, TO LISTEN, TO THE--

I WATCHED EVERYTHING. THAT WAS MY BIG FASCINATION

MY WHOLE LIFE, WAS WATCHING YOU AND OSCAR...

Lynn: BATTLE IT OUT.

YEAH, BOTH PRIVATELY, AND ALSO TO WATCH

HOW YOU FUNCTIONED IN FAMILY SITUATIONS

- OR IN PARTIES, TO SEE-- - Mother: I THOUGHT I WAS GREAT IN FAMILY SITUATIONS.

YOU MEAN, ACTING THAT YOU WERE HAPPILY MARRIED TO HIM?

Mother: I HAD TO.

- Lynn: NO, YOU DIDN'T. - FOR 17 YEARS I PUT ON A GREAT SHOW.

WELL, I WATCHED THE PERFORMANCE.

- I WAS YOUR BEST AUDIENCE. - OKAY. FAN, RIGHT.

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT A FAN, BUT I WAS YOUR BEST AUDIENCE.

- OKAY, NOW-- - Alan: I WAS THE MOST ATTENTIVE AUDIENCE.

AND ON SOME LEVEL, THAT VERY WELL MAY BE THE CAUSE OF ALL THIS.

- I'M NOT BLAMING YOU. - RIGHT.

Mother: OKAY, ARE WE FINISHED WITH ME?

- LET'S GO BACK TO YOU, ALAN. - Alan: TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT.

TURN AROUND. KEEP TURNING AROUND.

- SHOW THE BELLY ONE MORE TIME. - NOT NOW. GOODBYE.

- SHOW THE BELLY ONE MORE TIME. - NO, GO AWAY.

IT'S HIS BELLY, IT'S NOT EVEN YOURS.

GO AWAY. BYE, ALAN.

- Alan: SHARON? - ALAN, I SAID NOT TO. COME ON.

( water running )

HOW'S HE GONNA KNOW HIS MOMMY?

HE'LL KNOW HIS MOMMY. ALAN, STOP IT.

- ALAN, STOP IT. - ( Alan chuckles )

I LIKE THIS WIPE THAT YOU'RE MAKING. IT'S VERY VISUAL.

ALAN, COME ON. WE DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME.

ONE MORE TIME.

- WHAT? - ONE MORE TIME.

- SHOW THE BELLY ONE MORE TIME. - NO NO! NO.

- Alan: CAN I TURN OUT THE LIGHT? - YEAH, PLEASE.

- ( light switch clicking ) - ( distant thrumming )

( clicking continues )

( clicking quickening )

- ( woman squeals ) - ( baby crying )

Nurse: LET ME GET THE LITTLE YELLOW CLAMP, IF IT'S THERE.

( Alan laughing ) OH MY GOSH!

OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.

( baby crying )

OH MY GOD.

Alan: THESE ARE THE VERY FIRST RECORDED MOMENTS

IN THE LIFE OF ELI OZ BERLINER,

BORN 9:24 A.M.,

APRIL 6, 2004.

Nurse #1: HOLD ON TO YOUR BABY.

HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONNA PEE ON YOU.

Alan: HE KEPT US WAITING ALL NIGHT.

Nurse #2: YEAH, HE PROBABLY WILL TOO.

HE'S LIKE, "YOU'RE GONNA GET PEED ON."

Alan: BEST SLEEPLESS NIGHT I EVER HAD.

OH MY GOD.

Alan: NOW CHECK OUT ELI'S FIRST YAWN.

THERE. NOT EVEN FIVE MINUTES OLD,

AND HE'S YAWNING.

Doctor: MOST PEOPLE THINK YAWNING HAS TO DO WITH GETTING A QUICK SHOT OF OXYGEN.

KIND OF GIVES YOU A WAKE-UP.

STUDIES SHOW-- MAYBE, MAYBE NOT.

BUT THERE'S NO QUESTION THAT IT SEEMS TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH DROWSINESS

AND THAT IT'S INFECTIOUS.

Alan: SO WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF I CREATED A SEQUENCE IN MY FILM,

OF SEVERAL PEOPLE IN A ROW YAWNING?

Doctor: YOU'RE GONNA GET PROBABLY 90% OF THE AUDIENCE

YAWNING WITH YOU.

Alan: I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN SO TIRED THAT I'VE YAWNED

AFTER JUST READING THE WORD "YAWN"

HOW ABOUT THIS LITTLE FACTOID:

GOING WITHOUT SLEEP FOR 24 HOURS

GIVES YOU THE SAME REACTION TIME

AS SOMEONE WHO WOULD BE CONSIDERED

LEGALLY DRUNK.

WILL THERE EVER BE A SO-CALLED "SLEEPALYZER,"

LIKE THERE'S A BREATHALYZER,

LIKE WE CAN TAKE BLOOD AND MEASURE CHOLESTEROL?

Doctor: I HOPE SO.

PEOPLE ARE SEARCHING FOR IT,

THEY'RE WORKING ON IT,

AND ITS APPLICATION IS ENORMOUS.

( bell dings )

Announcer: THE OBJECT IS TO NOTE THE POSITION OF THE CLOCK HAND

- AT THE INSTANT THE BELL SOUNDS. - ( bell dings )

- 30. - Announcer: THE MORE REST AND RELAXATION WE GET,

THE GREATER IS OUR MENTAL EFFICIENCY

AND THE MORE QUICKLY WE REACT.

- ( bell dings ) - 50?

Narrator: YOU CAN TRY THIS TEST YOURSELF.

REMEMBER, TRY TO TELL

WHERE THE HAND OF THE CLOCK IS WHEN THE BELL RINGS.

READY?

( bell dings )

DID YOU GET IT RIGHT-- 20?

DON'T BLAME YOURSELF IF YOU DIDN'T MAKE A GOOD SCORE.

MAYBE YOU WERE UP TOO LATE LAST NIGHT.

( bell dings )

NOW IN CASE YOU'RE ASKING, IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING,

"WHY DOESN'T HE JUST DRINK A CUP OF COFFEE RIGHT NOW

AND PUT HIMSELF OUT OF THIS MISERY?"

I HAVEN'T HAD 20 CUPS OF COFFEE IN MY WHOLE LIFE.

- YOUR LIFE? - LIFE.

I LEARNED A LONG TIME AGO THAT CAFFEINE MADE ME...

- ...HYPER. - HYPER.

- HYPER. - ( growls )

AND I LEARNED TO STAY AWAY FROM IT.

- COCA-COLA, PEPSI, SOFT DRINKS? - DON'T TOUCH IT.

- NO CAFFEINE AT ALL? - NO CAFFEINE.

IF I DRANK COFFEE,

I WOULDN'T SLEEP FOR DAYS.

FOR THE LAST 30 YEARS, THAT'S BEEN MY MANTRA.

THE WAY THAT I WAKE UP...

IS BY TAKING A SHOWER. A HOT SHOWER

FOR FIVE OR 10 MINUTES--

THAT JOLTS ME

INTO THE REAL WORLD.

I'VE BEEN GETTING A LOT OF PRESSURE

FROM FRIENDS AND FAMILY MEMBERS--

AND EVEN SOME PEOPLE ON THE CREW, I MIGHT ADD--

TO TRY TAKING COFFEE.

SO, UM, OKAY.

I'M NOT GONNA TAKE A SHOWER THIS MORNING.

I'M GONNA GO OUT RIGHT NOW,

GET A CUP OF COFFEE,

AND I'LL BE BACK IN...

10 MINUTES.

( ticking )

- Attendant: YES, SIR. WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? - FILL HER UP.

( ticking continues )

Alan: WHY CAN'T SLEEP BE LIKE GOING TO THE GAS STATION?

( ticking continues )

WHY CAN'T I STAY UP FOR AS LONG AS I WANT,

UNTIL I GET ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED...

AND THEN JUST START ALL OVER AGAIN?

( ticking continues )

Doctor: THAT'S A GOOD ANALOGY IF YOU WERE A CITY BUS.

THE BRAIN DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY.

WE HAVE A GROUP OF CELLS IN OUR BRAIN

THAT SORT OF ACT LIKE A CLOCK,

AND THAT'S REALLY WHAT DETERMINES

OUR SLEEP-WAKE SCHEDULE.

AND THAT CLOCK IS PROGRAMMED

TO HAVE YOU BE AWAKE DURING THE DAY,

AND SLEEP AT NIGHT.

IT CONTROLS EVERYTHING IN YOUR BODY, ACTUALLY--

WHEN YOU GET HUNGRY, WHEN YOU GO TO THE BATHROOM,

WHEN YOUR HORMONES ARE SECRETED,

BODY TEMPERATURE,

WHEN YOUR PERFORMANCE IS UP AND DOWN.

IT CONTROLS ALL OF THAT,

INCLUDING WHEN YOU'RE AWAKE...

AND WHEN YOU'RE ASLEEP.

( clock ticking )

( ticking, chiming continues )

( ticking stops )

Doctor: IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, AT ABOUT 3:00 TO 5:00 A.M.,

3:00 TO 6:00 A.M. ROUGHLY--

THESE ARE TIMES WHEN YOUR CLOCK HAS YOU AT YOUR LOWEST POINT

FOR YOUR PERFORMANCE, YOUR ALERTNESS, YOUR MOOD,

MANY OF YOUR HORMONES. YOUR INTERNAL BODY TEMPERATURE

IS AT ITS LOWEST POINT.

IT'S VERY POWERFUL.

THIS IS WHEN YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE ASLEEP.

YOU'RE PROGRAMMED TO BE ASLEEP AND IN BED.

Alan: WELL, IF THAT'S TRUE, THEN MY BIOLOGICAL CLOCK

NEEDS TO GO TO THE REPAIR SHOP,

'CAUSE EVEN AT THAT TIME OF THE MORNING

I'M PRETTY MUCH STILL COOKIN'.

IN THE OLD DAYS, I'D SOMETIMES GO TO SLEEP

AFTER THE SUN HAD COME UP,

BUT IT ALWAYS MADE ME FEEL WEIRD.

EVER SINCE THEN,

AS LONG AS IT'S STILL DARK OUT,

EVEN IF IT'S JUST FIVE OR 10 MINUTES BEFORE SUNRISE,

IT'S OKAY.

( clock ticking slowly )

SINCE I GO TO SLEEP SO LATE,

I HAVE MOST OF MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS TRAINED

NOT TO CALL ME BEFORE 11:00 IN THE MORNING.

BUT THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING

THAT WAKES ME UP TOO EARLY.

EITHER THE UPS GUY RINGS THE BELL, OR THE TELEPHONE RINGS,

OR THERE ARE HAMMERS POUNDING FROM CONSTRUCTION

IN THE APARTMENT NEXT DOOR,

OR I HAVE TO WAKE UP EXTRA EARLY TO DO A SHOOT FOR MY FILM.

- Doctor: THE DAY INTRUDES. - Alan: LIFE INTRUDES.

AND SO THAT WHOLE DAY I'M OPERATING

UNDER THE WEIGHT OF MY FATIGUE.

BY THE TIME THE LATE AFTERNOON ROLLS AROUND,

I CAN BARELY KEEP MY EYES OPEN.

Doctor: AND IN FACT, OUR BIOLOGICAL CLOCK

IS PROGRAMMED TO HAVE US SLEEPY DURING THIS TIME.

THAT'S PROBABLY WHY SIESTA WAS CREATED.

PEOPLE GET SLEEPY IN THAT AFTERNOON WINDOW.

IN GREAT BRITAIN, WHEN DO YOU DRINK HIGH TEA?

4:00 P.M., YOU'RE DRINKING CAFFEINE.

IN THE UNITED STATES, WHAT DO WE DO?

WE PUSH THROUGH IT. WE PRETEND IT DOESN'T EXIST AND JUST KINDA KEEP GOING.

Alan: ACTUALLY, OUR CONVERSATION IS REMINDING ME

OF A FILM SCREENING I HAD A FEW YEARS AGO.

I REMEMBER I HAD TO WAKE UP EXTRA EARLY THAT DAY TO CATCH A PLANE

IN ORDER TO BE THERE BY 4:00 IN THE AFTERNOON.

AND I REMEMBER I HADN'T SLEPT WELL

FOR THE FEW DAYS PRIOR TO THE SCREENING, ESPECIALLY THE NIGHT BEFORE.

- ( applause ) - AND I WAS SORT OF NERVOUS

ABOUT SPEAKING IN FRONT OF A LARGE CROWD OF PEOPLE,

ESPECIALLY BECAUSE I WAS SO TIRED.

BUT WHEN I GOT THERE, THERE WERE HARDLY ANY PEOPLE IN THE AUDIENCE.

- ( doctor laughs ) - AND IT WAS A BIG ROOM.

- THAT'S FUNNY. - Alan: I DON'T KNOW IF THAT HAPPENS

WHEN DOCTORS GIVE LECTURES, BUT ANYWAY, THAT'S A BIG PART

OF THE LIFE OF AN INDEPENDENT FILMMAKER.

BY THE WAY, I HAVE THIS LITTLE CAMERA,

WHICH I'LL TAKE FROM YOU NOW. THANKS A LOT.

DOES ANYONE MIND IF I STAND

IN THE BACK OF THE ROOM OR ON THE SIDE

AND TAKE SOME SHOTS OF THE AUDIENCE IN THE DARK?

DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY PROBLEM WITH THAT?

NO? OKAY, THANKS.

- ( film playing ) - Alan: LOUDER.

Alan's voice: BUT THAT'S NOT WHY I'M TELLING YOU THIS STORY.

FOR SOME REASON I DECIDED TO BRING MY CAMERA,

A LITTLE CAMERA THAT SHOOTS INFRARED, SO I COULD SEE IN THE DARK.

DIDN'T TAKE ME LONG TO SEE

THAT FIVE OR SIX PEOPLE IN THE ROOM HAD FALLEN ASLEEP...

- Alan: What's the matter? - Nothing.

Alan's voice: ...WERE LITERALLY ASLEEP

What happens now?

( bell chimes )

Doctor: THE MOST SLEEP-DEPRIVED GROUP IN OUR SOCIETY

ARE COLLEGE KIDS.

THEY ARE GETTING SO LITTLE SLEEP, THEY ARE TIRED ALL THE TIME.

SO THEY'RE SLEEPY TO START WITH.

- ( bell chimes ) - THE OTHER IS 4:00 IN THE AFTERNOON.

YOU'RE IN THAT WINDOW SIESTA TIME.

AND SO STAYING AWAKE'S A PRETTY GOOD EFFORT,

'CAUSE YOU GOTTA OVERRIDE THAT BIOLOGY.

IF YOU HAVEN'T HAD ENOUGH SLEEP,

AND SO THERE'S A PRESSURE FOR SLEEP,

WHATEVER YOU DO THAT'S CONDUCIVE TO FALLING ASLEEP--

LIKE PUT THE LIGHTS OUT, MAKE IT WARM,

GET COMFY-- ALL THAT'S GONNA DO

IS LET THE SLEEPINESS EMERGE

AND YOU'RE GONNA NOD OFF.

Man in film: Means nothing to me.

You're making one mistake. You're trying to put your head on my shoulders,

and it won't work.

There's an old saying, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks,"

and I'm that old dog.

Doctor: A LOT OF TIME PEOPLE SAY, "OH, IT WAS THE BORING FILM THAT PUT ME TO SLEEP."

Alan: THANKS FOR NOT SAYING THAT IT WAS MY FILM THAT WAS BORING.

Doctor: AND IT WASN'T. AND THAT'S WHAT'S CRITICAL ABOUT THIS.

Man on film: How do I know what you're talking about?

Doctor: IF PEOPLE HAD ENOUGH SLEEP,

AND YOU PUT 'EM IN A BORING LECTURE, OR A BORING FILM,

THEY'LL SIT THERE AND BE BORED.

AND THEY'LL BE DOING A CROSSWORD PUZZLE,

OR THEY'LL SAY "WHY DID I COME TO THIS THING?"

OR, "GOD, THIS IS REALLY HORRIBLE."

- Man: You're boring the shit outta me... - BUT THEY'LL BE AWAKE.

( bell dings )

Alan: LET THE COFFEE EXPERIMENT BEGIN.

CHEERS.

( clock ticking )

( inhales ) HMM.

IT FEELS LIKE THE PRESENCE

OF SOMETHING DIFFERENT IN MY BLOODSTREAM.

JUST A LITTLE SOMETHING'S GOING ON. IT'S A LITTLE DIFFERENT.

STARTING TO FEEL SOMETHING HAPPENING IN MY EXTREMITIES,

MY TOES ESPECIALLY.

FEELING IT IN MY ARMS

A LITTLE BIT. I'M FEELING...

A SORT OF A TINGLING IN MY ARMS.

AND I'M STARTING TO FEEL SOME SWEAT IN MY ARMPITS.

IS COFFEE KNOWN FOR MAKING PEOPLE SWEAT?

YES. YES. WOW.

MY EYES FEEL...

UM, MORE AWAKE, MORE OPEN. MY EYES FEEL MORE OPEN.

IT'S OFFICIAL. I HAVE NOW HAD MY FIRST CUP OF COFFEE

IN MORE THAN 31 YEARS.

FEELING QUITE ACTIVE--

ACTIVATED, I SHOULD SAY.

NOW, UM-- ARE WE IN A WIDE SHOT NOW?

NO? HEAD AND SHOULDERS SHOT.

CAN WE MAKE IT A WIDE SHOT? CAN WE MAKE IT A WIDE SHOT?

DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO MAKE IT A WIDE SHOT. KEEP ROLLING.

WHILE THE CAMERA'S RESETTING POSITIONS,

THINK BACK TO WHAT I LOOKED LIKE THIS MORNING WITHOUT COFFEE.

TESTING, ONE, TWO, THREE. TESTING, ONE, TWO, THREE.

THIS IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE WITH COFFEE.

- WE HAVE A WIDE SHOT NOW? - Man: MM-HMM.

OKAY. NOW WHILE I HAVE THIS MOMENT AND WHILE I HAVE THE ENERGY,

YOU SEE THESE BOXES BEHIND ME?

RED, ORANGE, YELLOW, GREEN, BLUE, VIOLET--

THE COLORS OF THE SPECTRUM.

THE RED BOXES,

THEY ARE BLACK AND WHITE FILM--

OLD NEWSREELS, EDUCATIONAL FILMS,

THINGS I GOT FROM THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES.

THE ORANGE BOXES ARE SOUND EFFECTS.

( loud scraping )

FOOTSTEPS ON BRUSH, CEMENT, DIRTX@GRASS, GRAVEL,

GROUND, INTERIOR, SNOW, WATER... ( sighs )

THE YELLOW IS COLOR FILM.

FILMMAKERS ACTUALLY GIVE ME THEIR OUTS,

BECAUSE THEY KNOW THAT I'LL STORE THEM AND PUT THEM IN THE ARCHIVE.

THE GREEN BOXES ARE AMERICAN FAMILY HOME MOVIES

FROM THE 1920s, '30s AND '40s,

ALL ANONYMOUS.

IN A WAY, SOMETIMES I THINK OF THIS

AS SORT OF AN ORPHANAGE FOR LOST HOME MOVIES.

THIS IS SOME RARE FOOTAGE FROM THE OLD NEGRO BASEBALL LEAGUES.

- ( film reel rattling ) - ( no sound )

LOOKS LIKE SHE'S BEEN DRINKING SOME COFFEE TOO.

THE BLUE BOXES CONTAIN MY OWN FAMILY HOME MOVIES,

MOSTLY STUFF MY FATHER SHOT WHEN I WAS A KID.

EVERYTHING ELSE IS STUFF I'VE SHOT EVER SINCE.

THIS VIOLET BOXES-- REMEMBER, ROY G. BIV, THE VIOLET.

VIOLET, THESE ARE PHOTOGRAPHS THAT I'VE COLLECTED

ALL OVER THE WORLD, AGAIN ANONYMOUS.

PICK A BOX, ANY BOX. OKAY, THIS ONE.

CAN YOU SEE HERE? THESE ARE PORTRAITS.

I KNOW NONE OF THESE PEOPLE.

IF YOU RECOGNIZE ANYONE IN THIS BOX,

LET ME KNOW. I'LL GIVE THEM BACK THEIR PICTURE.

THE BLACK BOXES CONTAIN PHOTOGRAPHS

I'VE BEEN CUTTING OUT OF THE NEWSPAPER.

THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD OVER THE LAST 25 YEARS

IS SOMEWHERE IN THESE BOXES.

DID I MENTION EVERYTHING'S ALPHABETICAL? NATURALLY.

WHEN YOU SURROUND YOURSELF WITH SO MUCH STUFF,

YOU HAVE TO BE EXTREMELY ORGANIZED.

I NEED AN IMAGE-- I KNOW WHERE IT IS.

- I NEED A SOUND... - ( rushing water )

THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT, TO BE ABLE TO ACT AT THE SPEED OF THOUGHT.

EVERY TIME I GET AN IDEA, I WRITE IT DOWN

ON A SMALL PIECE OF PAPER.

AFTER I ACT ON IT, I PUT IT ON ONE OF THESE THINGS

- YOU SEE IN CHINESE RESTAURANTS. - ( bell dings )

BY THE WAY, I AM REALLY BUZZING RIGHT NOW.

OKAY, THIS SHELF RIGHT HERE--

THESE ARE ALL FOUND FAMILY PHOTO ALBUMS,

ORPHAN FAMILY PHOTO ALBUMS.

I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW THEY COME TO BE.

CAN YOU IMAGINE IF YOUR FAMILY PHOTO ALBUM

SOMEHOW ENDED UP AT A GARAGE SALE

- OR A FLEA MARKET, GOT LOST SOMEHOW? - ( telephone rings )

OOPS, THAT'S THE PHONE. THE PHONE'S RINGING DURING THE COFFEE EXPERIMENT.

SAY SOMETHING TO THE FILM. OKAY, HOLD ON, GO.

Mother: Did you fall asleep last night?

CAN'T REALLY TALK 'CAUSE I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS.

THAT WAS MY MOTHER. THIS IS A COLLECTION

OF GLASS NEGATIVES.

PEOPLE DRINK COFFEE EVERY DAY? I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE.

THIS CABINET RIGHT HERE CONTAINS EVERY PHOTOGRAPH

FROM MY ENTIRE LIFE.

MY MOTHER IS PREGNANT WITH ME HERE.

MY SISTER'S BORN HERE. IT'S OUR ENTIRE FAMILY

ALL THE WAY THROUGH MY LIFE UP TO HERE.

MY MOTHER'S SIDE OF THE FAMILY, MY FATHER'S SIDE OF THE FAMILY,

MY FATHER'S ARMY PICTURES, PARENTS' WEDDING PICTURES.

FOR BOTH SIDES OF MY FAMILY, I AM THE KEEPER OF THE MEMORY.

I DON'T THINK ANYONE REALLY KNOWS.

I DON'T THINK ANYONE REALLY CARES. OKAY.

I ALSO COLLECT OBJECTS, DIFFERENT OBJECTS.

HERE'S A DRAWER CALLED "SPHERES,"

"PYRAMIDS," "ALPHABET," "BELLS."

HERE'S A DRAWER CALLED "FLIPBOOKS."

"TIME." THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

MINIATURE WATCH PARTS.

( clock ticking )

THIS IS A SOUND SCULPTURE I ONCE MADE CALLED "AUDIOFILE."

HERE'S A DRAWER CALLED "NO TRESPASSING."

( dog barking )

( siren wailing )

( alarm bell ringing )

( banging )

Woman: Good morning. If you'd like to set your clocks,

WINS news time at the tone will be exactly 11:30.

( barking )

"SLEEPLESS NIGHT."

( baby crying )

( baby crying )

CAN YOU GO AND SIT WITH HIM, PLEASE?

I'M SO TIRED.

Alan: SHH!

( crying stops )

SHH!

( whispers) GO TO SLEEP.

- ( click ) - ( baby crying )

- GO WITH THE FLOW, ALAN. - Alan: HOW DO YOU GO WITH THE FLOW

- WHEN HE WAKES UP AT 3:00 IN THE MORNING EVERY DAY? - Shari: HE DOESN'T ANYMORE.

- ALL RIGHT, SO IT'S A FEW MONTHS. - Alan: 4:00 IN THE MORNING.

- HIS FIRST FEW MONTHS, THAT'S NORMAL. - CRYING CRYING CRYING.

- THAT'S NORMAL. - SO YOU WAKE UP, YOU BUM OUT,

AND YOU LET HIM CRY. YOU DON'T WANT ELI

TO GROW UP LIKE HOW YOU GREW UP, ALWAYS ASKING YOUR FATHER,

"HOW ARE YOU?" "I'M TIRED, AND I HAVE A HEADACHE."

YOU DON'T WANNA BE LIKE THAT.

Shari: WELL, THE TRUTH IS THAT HE IS VERY IRRITABLE THESE DAYS

BECAUSE HE'S NOT SLEEPING, AND BECAUSE OF THAT

- HE'S BEEN ARGUING WITH ME ALL THE TIME. - Mother: UH-OH.

- Alan: BUT YOU'RE TIRED TOO. - Shari: I'M NOT AS IRRITABLE.

HOW DO YOU KNOW? HOW DO YOU KNOW?

I KNOW. I SEE HOW I REACT. I SEE HOW YOU REACT.

WHEN YOU GET TIRED, YOU GET VERY IRRITABLE,

- Mother: I KNOW, I KNOW. IT'S TERRIBLE. - LET HIM TALK.

Alan: WHEN ELI WAS AGE

ZERO TO THREE MONTHS,

I WAS THE ONLY ONE IN OUR ENTIRE WORLD

THAT KNEW THAT HE HAD TO SLEEP BETWEEN 16, 18 HOURS A DAY,

- AND I KNEW WHY. - Shari: YOU SHOWED IT TO ME 15 MILLION TIMES.

FINE, OKAY. BECAUSE HIS BRAIN WAS GROWING.

OKAY, EVERYBODY'S BRAIN IS GROWING.

IT'S GONNA GROW.

WHEN THEY'RE SLEEPING!

A NEW BABY IS GONNA SLEEP,

EVEN IF YOU WEREN'T CONTROLLING IT.

EVEN IF IT'S NOT 16 HOURS, HIS BRAIN WOULD GROW.

Lynn: MOST PARENTS AREN'T CONTROLLING THEIR SLEEP.

I THINK ALAN JUDGES HIS DAY

BY HOW MANY NAPS ELI HAD.

"DID YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY?" "WELL, ELI NAPPED THREE TIMES. I HAD A GREAT DAY."

NO, THAT'S HIS SCALE OF LIFE.

Mother: I MEAN, REALLY, IT'S BECOMING...

AD NAUSEAM, REALLY.

- Lynn: IT IS. - IT IS.

Mother: AND A MOTHER CAN TELL YOU THAT.

A SISTER CAN TELL YOU THAT.

BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT? PEOPLE WILL LIE TO YOU, NO PROBLEM.

- Alan: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? - DID HE SLEEP? YEAH, HE SLEPT.

HOW LONG DID HE SLEEP? UHH...

SO WAIT WAIT. WHEN I BRING HIM TO YOUR HOUSE TO BABYSIT,

- YOU'RE LYING TO ME ABOUT HOW LONG HE SLEEPS? - Mother: NO, BUT WE MIGHT.

- BUT WE COULD. - WE COULD, ABSOLUTELY.

WE WOULD.

- WE DON'T HAVE TO. - TO GIVE YOU PEACE OF MIND.

Alan: SOMEONE HAS TO KNOW WHAT THE STAKES ARE.

- I KNOW WHAT THE STAKES ARE. - ALAN, STOP IT. WE ALL KNOW WHAT THE STAKES ARE.

Lynn: WHAT ARE THE STAKES? WHERE YOU ARE TODAY?

( lullaby playing )

Alan: I HAVE BECOME

THE PROTECTOR OF HIS SLEEP.

I WANT HIM TO GO TO SLEEP

AT THE SAME TIME EVERY NIGHT.

I WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT HE TAKES NAPS

TWO OR THREE TIMES A DAY.

I WANNA MAKE SURE THAT THIS LITTLE BOY SLEEPS AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

WHEN HE IS SLEEPING,

I AM AT PEACE.

I FILMED ELI SLEEPING

WHEN HE WAS ABOUT TWO MONTHS OLD,

AND VERY SHORTLY AFTER I PUT HIM TO SLEEP

HIS FACE WENT INTO A SMILE.

Doctor: BABIES ACTUALLY SMILE IN SLEEP

BEFORE THEIR SMILE IN WAKEFULNESS.

AND HE'S ACTUALLY IN REM SLEEP

WHILE THIS IS HAPPENING,

HE'S DREAMING.

SOMEHOW HIS BRAIN IS PRACTICING

WHAT JUST MIGHT BE THE MOST IMPORTANT SURVIVAL SKILL OF ALL--

A SMILE,

SOMETHING THAT'S GOING TO STRENGTHEN THE BONDS OF LOVE

AND ATTACHMENT WITH HIS PARENTS.

Alan: AND IT WORKS.

Doctor: AND IT'S ALSO NOT A BAD SKILL FOR HIM TO LEARN

FOR LATER IN LIFE AS WELL.

Lynn: IT'S ALMOST AS IF ELI HAS BECOME

LIKE ALAN'S SCIENCE PROJECT.

DOES IT BOTHER YOU

THAT HE'S EATING A LOT?

- Alan: NO. - THANK GOD.

( Lynn laughs )

AS LONG AS IT DOESN'T INTERFERE WITH HIS NAPPING.

( all laugh )

( rattles )

Alan: I ACTUALLY THINK THAT

SLEEP COULD BE THE "X" FACTOR.

HE WILL BE MORE RESPONSIVE IN TERMS OF ALERTNESS,

LEARNING AND DEVELOPMENT IF HE'S WELL-SLEPT.

I COULD SEE HIS DISPOSITION IS BETTER,

HE'S NOT AS CRANKY, HE EATS BETTER.

WHEN HE'S HAD HIS NAPS,

AND WHEN HE'S IN A GROOVE WITH SLEEP...

- HEY, I'M OVER HERE. - Alan's voice: ...HE'S BETTER.

- Alan: MMMMM! - Lynn: I THINK IN ALAN'S NEXT LIFE

HE SHOULD BE A PEDIATRICIAN AND SPECIALIZE IN SLEEP,

'CAUSE YOU SOUND LIKE A TEXTBOOK.

Alan: WHEN HE'S TIRED, HE'S FUSSY.

Lynn: HE'S A BORE. THIS IS WHAT HE'S COME DOWN TO,

WORRYING ABOUT THESE THINGS.

I'M UPSET WITH YOUR OBSESSION.

- EXACTLY. I'M UPSET. - Lynn: IS THERE ANY CHANCE OF CHANGING,

- ANY ASPECT OF YOU? - I'M UPSET THAT

- YOU ARE LIKE THAT, ALAN. - YOU ARE POSSIBLY GIVING YOUR CHILD

THE BEST GIFT YOU COULD EVER GIVE HIM FOR HIS LIFE.

IN OUR SOCIETY TODAY NOBODY PROTECTS SLEEP.

AND FOR YOU TO DO THAT WITH YOUR CHILD

FROM THE BEGINNING OF HIS LIFE...

HOLD THAT FOR ONE SECOND. YOU SEE, SHARI?

YOU SEE, MOM? YOU SEE, LYNN? SEE?

THERE GOTTA BE LIMITS, 'CAUSE YOU GOTTA BE CAREFUL

NOT TO GET TOO CRAZY ABOUT IT.

OLDER FATHERS

- ARE THE MOST NEUROTIC. - ( women chuckle )

( clock ticking )

Doctor: YOU ARE REVVING

AT A HIGHER RATE THAN OTHER PEOPLE.

YOU GET ACTIVATED AT NIGHT.

YOU'RE ALERT BEFORE YOU GO TO SLEEP,

AND REALLY THE TIME YOU SHOULD BE SLEEPING,

IF YOU FOLLOW YOUR OWN BIOLOGICAL CLOCK,

IS QUITE LATE. SO YOUR CLOCK IS OFF.

( alarm ringing )

THAT IS A PARTICULAR CONDITION.

IT'S CALLED DELAYED SLEEP PHASE SYNDROME.

Alan: WHAT WAS THAT? SAY THAT AGAIN.

Doctor: DELAYED SLEEP PHASE SYNDROME,

WHICH IS OUR FANCY WORD FOR NIGHT OWL.

YOU ARE A NIGHT OWL.

ANYTHING THAT I HAVE TO DO, IF IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT,

I DO IT AT NIGHT.

I'M CINDERELLA IN REVERSE.

Alan: THE NIGHT FOR ME HAS BECOME

A TOTAL HAVEN.

THERE IS A SENSE OF BEING OUTSIDE OF TIME--

THE DARKNESS, THE SILENCE,

THE PEACEFULNESS OF IT.

FOOD TASTES BETTER. MUSIC SOUNDS BETTER.

I'M SHARPER.

Doctor: IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE YOU ACTUALLY ENJOY

BEING AWAKE MORE THAN YOU ENJOY SLEEP.

Alan: SOMETIMES I THINK I'M ADDICTED TO BEING AWAKE.

DOES THAT ALSO MEAN I'M ADDICTED TO BEING TIRED?

BUT IF I'M NOT GONNA SLEEP ANYWAY,

WHY TOSS AND TURN IN BED AND MAKE MYSELF CRAZY?

IF MY CURSE HERE IS

TO HAVE THREE EXTRA HOURS A NIGHT,

HEY, I'LL TAKE IT.

THAT'S 21 HOURS A WEEK.

THAT'S 90 HOURS A MONTH.

THAT'S 45 DAYS A YEAR.

OVER A 40-YEAR PERIOD,

THAT'S 1,800 DAYS--

FIVE YEARS OF ALERT, WAKING, PRODUCTIVE,

CREATIVE TIME THAT I'M ADDING TO MY LIFE.

IS THERE A DRUG OR A MAGIC POTION OR SOMETHING

WHERE I COULD STILL BE A NIGHT OWL,

GET FIVE OR SIX HOURS' SLEEP

- AND FEEL GREAT? - NO.

Alan: I'VE HEARD INSOMNIA DESCRIBED

AS THE LAST FRONTIER OF IMAGINATION

AND INDIVIDUAL FREEDOM BY A PHILOSOPHER NAMED BLANCHOT,

WHOSE POINT WAS THAT TO GO TO SLEEP WHEN EVERYONE ELSE GOES TO SLEEP

IS A SORT OF CONFORMITY; THAT TO WORK AND EMBRACE THE NIGHT

AND STAY AWAKE WHILE THE REST OF THE WORLD IS SLEEPING--

IT'S A KIND OF REBELLION.

( makes swishing sounds )

THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO SLEEP AFTER I DIE.

NOW I NEED TO SAY THIS REALLY IN A DEVILISH KIND OF WAY.

AM I ENOUGH, NOT ENOUGH, TOO MUCH?

HUH? NO, "AFTER I DIE" IS-- "ONCE I'M DEAD" IS A LITTLE TOO--

LIKE THE WORD "DEAD" IS TOO HARSH.

THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO SLEEP AFTER I DIE.

THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO SLEEP AFTER I DIE.

THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO SLEEP

AFTER I DIE, THAT IS.

NO, THE "THAT IS" DOESN'T-- ONE MORE TIME.

THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO SLEEP AFTER I DIE.

IT'S HARD TO GET THE--

YOU THINK I SAID IT THE RIGHT WAY, ONE OF THEM?

IT'S NOT AS THOUGH I'M RACING AGAINST TIME,

YOU KNOW, LIKE TRYING TO OUTRUN DEATH OR SOMETHING,

ALTHOUGH SOMETIMES IT FEELS THAT WAY.

( jazz music playing )

Alan: YOU KNOW, IN SOME MYTHOLOGIES THE GOD OF SLEEP

AND THE GOD OF DEATH ARE BROTHERS.

Doctor: SLEEP IS AS CLOSE AS YOU GET TO DEATH

IN YOUR CURRENT LIFE AS YOU PROBABLY EVER WILL.

SO WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT BEING TAUNTED EVERY DAY WITH--

"I DON'T WANT THAT.

I WANT BEING AWAKE.

I WANT LIFE,

THE JOY, THE PASSION, THE PRODUCTIVITY."

AND ANYTHING THAT DETRACTS FROM THAT, LIKE SLEEP...

...WHICH IS BORING, MONOTONOUS

AND A WASTE OF TIME--

Doctor: --THAT'S THE BATTLE THAT'S GOING ON.

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH MORE CREATIVE YOU MIGHT BE

IF YOU SLEPT A LITTLE MORE.

YOU MAY NOT CARE ABOUT AN EXTRA FILM OR TWO,

BUT YOU'D BE LIVING YOUR LIFE BETTER.

Doctor #2: MAYBE YOU CAN'T BECOME A BETTER FILMMAKER THAN YOU ALREADY ARE.

Alan: WELL, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT, BUT I'VE ALWAYS CONSIDERED

WORKING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO BE MY SECRET WEAPON.

Doctor: THAT'S A REAL PROBLEM WITH CREATIVE PEOPLE--

IS A LOT OF THEM ACTUALLY DO A LOT OF THEIR BEST WORK

WHEN THEY SHOULD BE SLEEPING.

THAT WAS "NIGHT IN TUNISIA,"

FEATURING THE LATE, GREAT CHARLIE PARKER ON ALTO SAXOPHONE.

- All of a sudden-- - Woman: Obviously, we don't all agree.

Doctor: THERE ARE CERTAIN SITUATIONS WHERE WE CAN QUANTIFY--

GET BETTER SLEEP,

GET A BETTER SCORE ON THAT TEST.

IN THE CREATIVE REALM, IT'S HARD TO KNOW.

Doctor #2: CHARLIE PARKER WAS SUCH A DAMN GOOD MUSICIAN

'CAUSE HE NEVER SLEPT AND USED DRUGS.

HE WOULD HAVE BEEN 10 TIMES THE MUSICIAN HE WAS

HAD HE SLEPT BETTER.

HE WAS ALREADY A GREAT MUSICIAN.

YOU TAKE A GREAT PERSON, GIVE THEM THE SLEEP THEY NEED,

AND YOU BECOME EVEN GREATER.

Alan: BUT PART OF WHAT MADE HIM A GREAT MUSICIAN

IS THAT HE DIDN'T SLEEP,

AND THAT WAS HIS STORY.

NOW IF YOU TOOK THAT AWAY,

HE'D BE A TOTALLY DIFFERENT PERSON.

EINSTEIN SLEPT 10 HOURS A NIGHT.

NOW I DON'T KNOW IF HE REALLY DID,

BUT THAT'S THE MYTHOLOGY. AND, YOU KNOW, WE THINK OF EINSTEIN

AS THE MOST BRILLIANT MIND EVER.

BUT THEN AGAIN, EDISON DIDN'T SLEEP MORE THAN FOUR HOURS A NIGHT.

SO HE SAID,

BUT HE BRAGGED ABOUT BEING ABLE TO NAP INSTANTLY

ANY TIME OF THE DAY,

AND ONLY A VERY SLEEP-DEPRIVED PERSON COULD DO THAT.

Alan: MY FRIEND SPENCER SUGGESTED THE OTHER DAY

THAT I TRY A NEWS FAST--

NO NEWSPAPERS, NO RADIO,

NO TELEVISION, NO INTERNET...

JUST SHUT IT DOWN FOR A WEEK OR TWO.

MAYBE EVEN TAKE SHARI AND ELI

AND GET OUT OF THE CITY FOR A WHILE.

MAYBE THAT WOULD RELAX ME,

CALM ME DOWN,

HELP ME SLEEP BETTER AT NIGHT.

NO WAY.

I'M STARTING TO THINK I MIGHT BE SUFFERING

FROM SOME KIND OF URBAN DISEASE,

THE NEED TO FEEL CONNECTED,

PLUGGED IN...

- Radio announcer: All news... - Alan: ...ALL THE TIME.

This is 1010 WINS. You give us 22 minutes,

- we'll give you the world. - ( stations rapidly changing )

Doctor: THIS IS PART OF WHO YOU ARE.

AND IF WE CHANGE THIS PART,

LIKE WE CHANGE ANY OTHER PIECE OF YOU--

THAT YOU LIVE IN NEW YORK OR THAT YOU HAVE A YOUNG CHILD--

IF WE CHANGE ANY OF THAT, FOR SOMEONE WHO'S CREATIVE,

IT CHANGES EVERYTHING.

DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD NOT PURSUE

"HOW DO I SLEEP BETTER?"

BECAUSE YOU CAN STILL BE IN LOVE WITH THE NIGHT,

IMPROVE THE SLEEP

AND GET A DIFFERENT WAKEFULNESS EXPERIENCE AS WELL.

Shari: ALAN, ALAN.

ALAN, ELI'S UP.

ALAN, SWEETIE, ELI'S UP.

- ( Eli faintly crying ) - YOU SAID YOU'D GO THIS MORNING.

SHARI, I THINK-- WHAT TIME IS IT?

- IT'S 6:20. - OKAY, I WENT TO SLEEP REALLY LATE.

BUT YOU SAID YOU'D GO THIS MORNING.

I CAN'T. REALLY LATE. JUST GIVE ME A BREAK THIS MORNING.

WHAT? THIS MORNING? YOU SAID THIS WAS THE MORNING,

IF HE WAS CRYING-- COME ON, IT'S NOT FAIR.

DON'T WAKE ME UP.

ALAN, SWEETIE, IT'S NOT FAIR. HE'S CRYING.

I'M GONNA FIGURE IT OUT, AND I CAN'T DO IT NOW.

- I'LL FIGURE IT OUT. - FIGURE IT OUT WHEN?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

PLEASE.

- YOU PROMISED ME. - SHARI, I'M, LIKE, ON THREE HOURS' SLEEP.

THREE HOURS, THREE HOURS. DON'T WAKE ME UP. DON'T WAKE ME UP.

- Shari: OKAY. - ( Eli wailing )

Alan: THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT ELI SLEEPS THROUGH THE NIGHT NOW.

Shari: ELI, GOOD MORNING, SWEETIE.

Alan: HE GOES TO SLEEP AROUND 8:00.

- Shari: HELLO. - Alan: ACTUALLY, I SHOULD SAY HE GOES TO SLEEP EXACTLY

- Alan: AT 8:00 EVERY NIGHT... - Shari: ONE SECOND. ONE SECOND.

...AND WAKES UP ANYWHERE BETWEEN 6:00, 6:30,

SOMETIMES QUARTER TO 7:00 IN THE MORNING.

GOOD MORNING. YEAH.

THE BAD NEWS IS THAT BECAUSE I GO TO SLEEP

AT 3:30 OR 4:00,

AND HE STARTS CRYING AT 6:30,

I'VE GOTTEN TWO, THREE HOURS' SLEEP.

I'M JUST OPENING THE SHADE.

YOU KNOW I MISS SEEING HIM IN THE MORNING.

Shari: AND ELI MISSES YOU IN THE MORNING.

IN THE MORNING, HE COMES KNOCKING ON THE DOOR, AND HE GOES,

"DADDY DADDY DADDY." AND I HAVE TO PULL HIM AWAY

AND GO, "SHH! SHH! DADDY'S SLEEPING. DADDY'S SLEEPING."

Alan: ARE YOU MAD AT ME?

- DO YOU HATE ME? - Shari: DO I HATE YOU? NO.

Alan: BECAUSE I HAVE TO TELL YOU SOMETHING. I FEEL GUILTY.

- I FEEL GUILTY. - Shari: WELL, YOU SHOULD FEEL GUILTY.

IT'S LIKE YOU LIVE IN A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE FROM ME AND ELI.

IT'S GONNA HAVE TO CHANGE

BECAUSE I CAN'T GO ON LIKE THIS ANYMORE.

Doctor: WELL, WHAT SHOULD WE DO?

YOU TELL ME.

Doctor: WE HAVE TO RESET YOUR CLOCK.

( ticking )

SINCE YOU'RE SUCH A NIGHT OWL,

I'D LIKE TO MOVE YOUR SLEEP CYCLE EARLIER

BY HAVING YOU GET LIGHT EXPOSURE IN THE MORNING.

WHEN YOU WAKE UP, THROW ON SOME CLOTHES

AND GO OUTDOORS FOR AN HOUR.

I REALLY WANT LIGHT TO GET INTO YOUR EYES,

'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT'S GONNA MOVE YOUR RHYTHM SO THAT YOU CAN FALL ASLEEP EARLIER.

Doctor #2: LIGHT IS ONE OF THE MOST POWERFUL CUES

FOR YOUR INTERNAL CLOCK TO KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS.

YOU SEE LIGHT, AND IT TELLS YOU BE ACTIVE DURING THE DAY,

SLEEP AT NIGHT.

Doctor #1: PEOPLE WHO ARE NIGHT OWLS DON'T LIKE THE LIGHT,

AVOID THE LIGHT IN THE MORNING, AND IN FACT

THAT'S THE IMPORTANT CUE THAT KEEPS THEIR CLOCK IN TRIM.

I'D LIKE YOU TO SPEND JUST 6 1/2 HOURS IN BED,

- GIVE YOU LESS TIME IN BED THAN YOU WANT. - ( buzzer sounds )

IT SEEMS TO ME THAT 2:30 TO 9:00 IN THE MORNING

WOULD BE A REASONABLE WAY TO GO.

( alarm clock rings )

REDUCING THE AMOUNT OF SLEEP THAT PEOPLE HAVE

UNTIL THEY'RE EXTREMELY EFFICIENT...

...IS GONNA MAKE YOU ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED IN THE DAYTIME.

( eerie music playing )

( whispers ) ZOMBIE TIME.

Doctor: AND THAT'S THE PROBLEM WITH THIS THERAPY--

IS THAT YOU WILL BE A ZOMBIE.

BUT WHAT WILL HAPPEN IS EVENTUALLY

WE WILL BUILD A SLEEP DEBT UP SO HIGH

THAT YOU WILL START SLEEPING.

AND IF WE CAN SQUEEZE OUT SOME OF THESE AWAKENINGS,

OR MAKE THEM SHORTER,

THAT MAY START THE BALL ROLLING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

LET'S TRY THIS FOR A MONTH OR TWO.

A MONTH OR TWO? A MONTH OR TWO?

YOU'RE GONNA HATE IT THE FIRST WEEK. I GUARANTEE YOU THAT,

SO I WANT YOU TO PICK A TIME

WHERE THIS IS CONVENIENT TO DO, WHERE YOU DON'T HAVE LOTS OF DEADLINES,

'CAUSE YOU ARE GONNA BE DYSFUNCTIONAL.

Alan: TRY IT. IT COULD TAKE MONTHS.

IT MIGHT NOT EVEN WORK. LET'S TRY IT.

HOW CAN I MAKE A DECISION LIKE THAT WHEN I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF A FILM?

THAT'S BULLSHIT. EVERYBODY HAS TO MAKE TOUGH CHOICES.

IT'S NOT FAIR TO SHARI. SHE KNEW I HAD A SLEEPING PROBLEM WHEN SHE MARRIED ME.

THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT RIGHT.

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, TAKE SLEEPING PILLS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?

DON'T YOU SEE HOW HARD THIS IS FOR ME?

STOP BEING SO DAMN STUBBORN ALL THE TIME.

YOU SHOULD STOP TELLING PEOPLE YOU'RE TIRED ALL THE TIME.

YOU'RE SUCH A SCHMUCK.

- YOU DON'T WANNA BE HELD BACK. - WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SCHMUCK?

Mother: YOU DON'T.

- FINISH THIS FILM AND GET-- - Lynn: AND THEN MOVE ON!

--GET TO ANOTHER SUBJECT, ALAN,

BECAUSE THIS FILM RUINED YOU IN A WAY.

NOT ELI, THIS FILM.

- Lynn: IT TOOK THE OBSESSION TO, LIKE... - Mother: ...GREATER HEIGHTS.

Alan: I TURNED ON THE TELEVISION

AND SAW THAT ELI WAS PLAYING

WITH THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES,

AND A PART OF ME IS JEALOUS.

I SHOULD BE PLAYING WITH ELI.

SO I GET IN A CAR

AND I DRIVE AS FAST AS I CAN TO WASHINGTON, D.C.

AND I'M ON THE HIGHWAY LOOKING FOR AN EXIT

CALLED "O'DAY STREET,"

BUT THE BRAKES DON'T WORK AND I CAN'T STOP THE CAR.

AND SO I MISSED THE EXIT

CALLED O'DAY STREET.

NOW BECAUSE I'D MAKE A FILM ABOUT NAMES A FEW YEARS AGO,

I KNOW THAT THE LETTER "O" PUT IN FRONT OF A WORD

IS WHAT'S CALLED A PATRONYMIC.

IT MEANS "SON OF,"

SO WHEN THE SIGN SAID "O'DAY,"

THAT MEANS "SON OF DAY."

IT MEANS I'M MISSING THE LIGHT.

I'M MISSING THE SUN.

I'M MISSING THE LIGHT OF DAY,

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY,

S-O-N.

ELI--

HE'S MY "SON OF DAY."

I MISS MY SON.

I'M A NIGHT PERSON AND YOU'RE A MORNING PERSON.

- WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO? - ( Shari laughs )

WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO? WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

YOU WANT ME TO BECOME A MORNING PERSON,

OR SHOULD YOU BECOME A NIGHT PERSON?

DO YOU WANNA BECOME A NIGHT PERSON TOO?

Shari: ELI, I DON'T THINK YOUR DADDY WOULD LET YOU BECOME A NIGHT PERSON.

- HE MAKES YOU GO TO BED EARLY. - THAT'S TRUE.

Alan: WHAT AM I GONNA DO, SHARI?

YOU'RE GONNA COME TO BED EARLIER WITH ME,

WHICH WILL BE REALLY NICE.

THEN WE'LL GET TO GO TO BED TOGETHER.

AND THEN YOU'RE GONNA BE ABLE TO WAKE UP EARLIER.

Alan: WHAT ABOUT MY LIFE AS A FILMMAKER?

Shari: YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO FIGURE OUT A WAY HOW TO MAKE FILMS

LIKE A NORMAL HUMAN BEING,

NOT AT 4:00 OR 5:00 IN THE MORNING.

Alan: WELL, RIGHT NOW I CAN'T GIVE IT UP.

Shari: DO YOU THINK YOU CAN AFTER THIS FILM?

( Alan sighs ) IT'S JUST WE'RE GOING AGAINST

40-PLUS YEARS

OF PATTERN,

REPETITION, HABIT

AND BIOLOGY.

Alan narrating: I'VE ALWAYS ACCEPTED MY GROGGY MORNINGS

BECAUSE THEY COME WITH MY GLORIOUS NIGHTS.

THREE HOURS OF SLEEP.

IT'S THE PRICE I'VE BEEN WILLING TO PAY.

THAT'S PART OF A COMMITMENT I MADE TO MYSELF

A LONG LONG TIME AGO.

- I AM WHAT I AM. - IT'S GONNA HAVE TO CHANGE.

OF COURSE, I ALSO MADE A LIFELONG COMMITMENT

TO BE A GREAT PARTNER TO SHARI.

AND I LOVE ELI SO MUCH, IT HURTS.

NOW THAT THE FILM IS OVER, I KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO.

THE QUESTION IS,

CAN I DO IT?

( pewriter bell dings )

LET'S DO A TAKE OF ME THANKING EVERYONE ON CAMERA

IN CASE I DON'T USE LOWER THIRDS

INSIDE THE FILM, OKAY?

I'D LIKE TO THANK ALL OF MY VERY SPECIAL GUESTS--

DR. WILLIAM DEMENT,

DR. LEONID KAYUMOV,

DR. MARK ROSEKIND,

DR. RICHARD SIMON,

DR. ART SPIELMAN,

AND OF COURSE, MY MOTHER REGINA,

MY SISTER LYNN,

AND ESPECIALLY SHARI FOR BEING SO GENEROUS,

SO PATIENT AND SO UNDERSTANDING.

- THIS IS FOR ALL YOU INSOMNIACS OUT THERE. - ( rock music playing )

ROLL CREDITS.

OH, I FORGOT THE THING ABOUT ELI.

THANK YOU, ELI.

OUR COLLABORATIONS HAVE ONLY JUST BEGUN.

( rock music playing )