Original subtitles

Okay.

Hot plates. Hot plates. You had the garlic chicken. You had the grilled

Oh, it's the other way around. I had the chicken. Switch seats.

Please. I can't.

What are you so distracted by anyway?

The police just found Duke Robinson trying to make a run from the law.

kidding. I heard his lawyers were turning him over to the police this

be arrested.

It's our anniversary dinner. He never showed. Can you believe this? A famous

astronaut, a guy who's got everything, is suddenly accused of murdering his own

brother. Now he's trying to run before he has to spend the rest of his life in

miserable jail cell rotting away.

Champagne or red wine to celebrate?

I'd love champagne.

Joel, shouldn't we get some champagne?

I can't believe Duke would run.

I have a couple of sport jackets from the Duke Robinson line. Oh, he's

They just caught him hightailing it up the Jersey Turnpike to New York. One of

his old astronaut friends is driving. The same guy who drove the lunar orbiter

while Duke walked on the moon.

I guess some people are just born to be the second banana.

Anyway, Joel, we've laughed 20 years together.

So, have a ball, enjoy your meal, have a wonderful time. Here's your check. Just

leave the money on the table.

Okay, okay, what's happening now?

Duke still got a gun to his head. They don't know where he's going. I have to

to the bathroom, but I can't get my eyes off of it.

This is just too weird.

When I first saw Duke on the moon, it made me want to be an astronaut.

Really? Well, for like a day.

Until my mom told me if I wanted to fit in the capsule, I had to cut out the

hostess group, guys.

I made my choice. I live with it. I have no regrets.

Well, he's going to have a few regrets. He's guilty as sin.

How can you say that, Mary Margaret?

The man is a national hero. Ray, he's running. Innocent people don't run.

he walks around in his uniform all the time.

Oh, a proof positive.

Why don't we just give him the chair and then we'll go out and lynch Captain

Kangaroo, huh?

May I be so bold as to remind you that in this country we have a little concept

called innocent until proven guilty.

Ray, the man's brother was found dead from a blow to the head with a hard

object. They found moon rock dust in his hair.

You don't know. I mean, what if somebody was trying to frame Duke, huh? Right.

Mr.

Astronaut in the living room with a moon rock.

Can we have another beer, please, Abe? Oh, you've got to wait your turn, Meg.

I'm a busy man.

This kind of high -tension drama makes a person very, very thirsty.

All right, now, who's next?

Uh, I've got to go right here.

God bless America.

Margaret, aren't you supposed to be leaving to meet your mother at the

Yeah, I still have time.

I didn't know your mother was flying in there.

Yeah, she decided we should spend a special mother -daughter weekend

repair our crappy relationship.

I'm sure it'll go great, and watching Terms of Endearment together on the

Lifetime channel will completely erase 32 years of resentment and dysfunction.

Ray, what are you still doing here? Didn't you say you had a big date

It is not polite to keep a girl waiting, you know that. Geez, you're right.

How do I look?

Too much mousse in it?

Uh -oh, uh -oh, check it out, he's speeding up.

It never pays to be early.

I don't want to look like I'm trying too hard, huh?

What's happening? What's happening? I was stuck in the subway. All I heard was

that Duke's on the run.

The lady next to me had a radio, but of course she was using it to communicate

with the dead.

Oh, my God. Is that Duke? Yes.

I ran by the paper first, but there are uses in a situation like this. They

still have updates coming over the wire on Desert Storm.

Will you stop hoarding the remote? Let's flip around and see who's got the best

copter shot.

Here you go. That would be $3.

$3? Yeah.

Here's always two bucks here. Hey, I've got the only TV in 15 blocks. But you're

right, who needs TV when you've got meaningful conversations?

I will give you the three bucks. Yeah, yeah.

Nadine!

Is this such a thing as waitress block? Because I think you've got it. Come on,

these dinners are getting cold.

Quiet!

Abe,

how many times have I asked you not to turn the television on during the dinner

hour? What the hell is this anyway?

World finals for slow highway driving?

Hey, this is a line -breaking story. Duke Robinson's making a run for it.

Oh.

Gee, it looks like the cops are probably going to catch him now, doesn't it?

Don't tell me that you're not interested in one of the most sensational stories

this country's ever witnessed.

I'm not interested. It's pure voyeurism and exactly the reason I don't own a

television. What are you, Amish?

Look, this goes beyond not owning a television.

I mean, this is alien behavior. You see, now you're scaring me.

I've got to go make some more desserts. This is like a crowd that's going to

linger over coffee.

And, Jack, don't get too distracted by this.

Remember, we've got plans for later.

Oh, yeah.

So we didn't make the Earth move last time, but there was a lot of pressure on

it. I feel very, very good about tonight.

Just to be fair, I bought myself a little something at Victoria's Secret.

Oh, that's an excellent store.

A little black lace number was sort of a...

Cut it. Hold it, hold it. He's changing lanes.

All right, the girl in the store liked it. Maybe I'll call her.

What time have you got?

6 .45. What have you got? 6 .42.

I like yours better.

No, there's not going to be any traffic out there at all. Everybody's watching

this. That's right. It'll take me like two seconds to get to my date's place. I

can make the airport in 45 minutes. Or 30 if I ask the cabbie to please drive

carefully.

Hey. You know, we're like an ancient tribe gathered around a campfire. Only

we're gathered around a television set.

Mesmerized by a drama that transcends all rational explanation.

I mean, is there a human being on the planet not watching this?

Look out! The old tipster's back.

Oh, a sold -out house. Hey, change the channel. My movie's on.

Hey, come on. It's my best role yet. I'm in almost every scene. It's called

Dangerous Seductions. I play a professional gambler who likes expensive

and cheap women.

A lot of actors would have found that complex enough, but not me.

I gave them a lift.

Give me that remote. All right,

so it's on Fox.

We had a pretty good budget.

Production designer made Buffalo look just like Monte Carlo.

Just a little.

Quiet, quiet, quiet. I'm talking about the sandwich.

What sandwich?

half a tuna sandwich at the crime scene and the other half at Duke's house.

Oh, what? Now the guy can't even eat?

The bite marks were identical.

Send him into the lab to compare with Duke's dental records. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. When that report gets back, I think it's just one small step into the

slammer for your hero rank. Hold it. Hold it. Hold it. Wait a minute.

Duke's lawyer is going to make a statement.

Oh, my God, I know him.

He's with the same firm that represented Charles when he was indicted for

insider trading.

All right, all right, who wants another round?

Hey, I'm telling you all now, prices are going up when he hits the George

Washington Bridge.

I am very close with Charles's lawyer's wife's sister. We go to the same

hairdresser. I am going to phone her and find out if she knows anything.

These reporters are hopeless. Everything is alleged or unconfirmed.

How about he did it, and he's going to fry?

Give the message they're getting.

Or I will. Ask him. Find out where he's going. Find out what he did with a

murder weapon. Find out how much gas he's got left. My best scene's on in

minutes.

All right.

Which one of you jokers ordered a tub of popcorn in a big go?

It's not funny.

Television is the root of all evil. Aren't you people bored with this thing

Yes.

This is boring.

I say we turn it to Fox in time to see my love scene with Tonya Harding.

Now, really, you should be watching a little of this because this is just not

about a crime. This is about human nature, what people might be capable of.

mean, how well do you really know something?

Oh, come on, Jack. When you have good people radar like I do, you can spot the

weirdos a mile away. I read in the newspaper that this Duke Robinson has a

gun collection.

Now, that tells me right there that he's got a screw list. Only nuts own guns.

Really? Really. I own a gun.

Well, it's not on.

I just don't understand how you could own a gun, and I thought I really knew

you. Andina, what's so terrible about owning a gun? I bought it legally. I

a permit.

Oh, I see. You have a permit.

So that if one day while you're twirling it in front of the mirror... and it

accidentally goes off and puts a hole through your groin so that you can never

service my needs again, we'll just pull out that old permit and let the

satisfaction of knowing that we have the paperwork in order carry us through our

golden years.

Were you not so worked up over this? A few years ago, there was a rash of break

-ins in my building, all right? So I bought a gun. I learned how to use it,

luckily, I've never needed it. I cannot believe that I have slept in an

apartment with a gun. Where do you keep it? In my nightstand. Oh, my...

Do you keep it loaded?

No, I thought I'd just throw it at the burglar.

Well, that is it for your place, Jack. No way am I going over there tonight. I

cannot have sex in a place with a gun.

Well, you have a cat.

I can't have sex in a place with a cat.

Maybe you want to just shoot the cat.

If you have a break in my apartment, I will.

Hey, Jack, come here. It's on the West Side Highway now.

He said it right this way.

Why would he be going downtown?

Probably so he can take his last drink at Abe Johnson's Blue Shamrock.

That'll be $4.

$5 .50, please.

Come on, Abe.

It doesn't have to be a circus.

Let's not forget a man's life has fallen apart here.

There's a guy outside selling Duke Robinson T -shirts. One says, free him.

other says, fry him.

How can people have sunk this love? Now, that's sickening.

Duke Robinson was a bona fide hero, and I feel bad for him.

which is why I invented a drink in his honor.

Who wants to try an orange rocket? Two parts vodka, one part pain.

Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it. They think they know where he's

going now. He's heading for Battery Park. Turn it off, we can't hear.

Duke Robinson has told his police escort that he just wants to get to Battery

Park so that he can look upon the Statue of Liberty, quote, one last time.

What'd I miss? What'd I miss? He just told the police he wants to go to the

Statue of Liberty and look upon it one last time.

Oh, God, I can't leave now. I just got off the phone with the airline.

My mother's plane just landed. Ah, the only plane in the history of JFK to land

on time.

Eh, I'm still okay. I mean, she's gonna be another 20 minutes in the baggage

plane before she realizes her suitcase is missing, then another 10 minutes to

fill out a missing baggage report. Yeah, yeah, I'm okay.

Ray, shouldn't you be going to pick up your date?

Oh, I already called her. She's meeting me here.

I said this is the type of experience you should share with others. Brilliant.

Okay, I have got some fresh info.

My friend Janice tells me that the police found a NASA tie clip at the

scene.

He could have given it to his brother as a gift.

And on the night of the murder, a neighbor reported seeing a man in a

helmet taking large, slow steps across the backyard.

Oh, right.

dead guy's chest.

Mary Margaret, would

you do me a favor?

When my date comes, would you give her your seat so she could sit next to me?

Gee, Ray, why don't you just ask me to give you a kidney? I got the best seat

the house.

Please.

It wouldn't seem like a date if she wasn't sitting next to me.

Oh, all right, all right.

Thanks. I know it's a big sacrifice.

That's okay. I guess you'd do the same for me.

Yeah, you know I would. I mean, a good friend's hard to find.

Look at this guy.

Aiden and abetting a fugitive on national television? Now, that's a good

Hey, Mary Murray, would you aid and abet me?

Yes, yes, I would, Ray.

Because I would know you were innocent, and I would work the rest of my life to

clear your name.

You know, I'd do anything for you. Really?

Yeah. Would you go pick my mother up at the airport?

Come on.

It's a big climax. I can't leave now. Neither can I.

Excuse me, Ray.

Hi, Ellen.

Boy, you look great.

Oh, thank you.

I'd like you to meet my good friend, Mary Margaret Tynan. Hi.

I'll tell you how good a friend she is. Mary Margaret said she'd give up her

seat for you.

Didn't you, Mary Margaret?

Yeah, okay.

If you drink half a beer and pass out or anything, I get it back.

Shall I just break out the dinty more stew and the tater tots?

Dana, honey, please, not now.

The moment of truth is about to happen. He's pulling into Battery Park.

Battery Park?

Really? That's right near here.

The police cars are pulling in behind the Aerostar, which has come to a

stop.

Duke Robinson has come to view the Statue of Liberty, I quote, one last

just as he said on his car phone to the police.

And what he will do now is anybody's guess.

Oh, my God, what do you think is going to happen? You think he's going to make

swim for us? Make a run to the ferry?

You think he has a boat waiting for us? Nadine, stop that chattering. I'm trying

to hear this.

I thought you weren't interested.

Don't you have a musket to clean or something?

The car door is open. Oh, God, the tension is unbearable.

He might kill himself.

Even I can't look.

What he will do now is anybody's guess.

So tell me, Ellen, do you have any hobbies?

The Aerostar has been parked here in Battery Park for almost an hour, and

no sign that Duke Robinson intends to leave the car.

He has chosen to remain inside the car, perhaps waiting for something or

someone.

We just don't know.

Oh, man, this is starting to drag.

Even murder she wrote moves along faster than this.

You're not bored, are you?

No.

Not at all.

This is a wonderful first date.

Besides, these things take time.

You're very patient.

I like that in a girl.

Hey, Dana.

Maybe we should go home, huh? I mean, this could take all night.

We have a little business to take care of. Oh, no, we can't go now. We have to

see how it ends.

It can't happen any second.

Is it just me, or does anyone else want to hear a shot ring out? Oh, please.

Mary Margaret?

I thought you were going to meet me at the airport.

Not that I expected you to be there.

It's amazing you can hold... down a job.

Ma, Ma, I'm really sorry. I was on my way to get you, really.

You know, when I got into that cab with the cure for bronchitis growing under

the front seat, I thought, should I go to my daughter's apartment where she

should be making herself pretty for the date she should be having? Or to that

bar where she sits on a stool and calmly drinks while her ovaries dry up and

wither away?

Good to see you too, Ma. Good to see you again, Mrs. Tynan.

Uh, this is my date, Ellen.

Even Ray has a date.

I was really trying to get away, Mom, but I got caught up in this whole Duke

Robinson historic chase national tragedy thing, and I lost track of time.

Oh, I know all about it. The pilot kept us all up to date during the flight.

Don't tell me he's still in the car.

He's still in the suit.

Night has fallen here in Battery Park, and still Mr. Robinson sits inside his

vehicle. It's dark outside now, and...

No movement from the car.

She's vamping.

She's one step away from going to Sally Ride for the woman's point of view.

All right, look, let's switch this to Channel 4 and see what they've got.

Wait, wait, wait.

reactions to this bizarre turn of events.

Sir.

Sir, I'd like to ask you why you chose to come down here.

Because I'm a moron.

Well, actually, I knew Duke pretty well.

Oh, really? And how do you know Mr. Robinson?

I was working on this little film called Capricorn One.

right next to one another, and one day I dinged his car.

And that was the beginning of your friendship?

No, he just yelled at me.

And that's it?

Although I do want to say that as close as we were, there is no way that I could

have foretold...

Duke Robinson had a problem with his temper.

It continues to be dark.

You can go if you want to, Ellen. This looks like it's going to go on a while.

Oh, no. Let's stay and watch.

I'd feel silly paying for a movie while this is on.

Besides, I've never seen anyone kill themselves before.

I hope he doesn't.

I say he will.

Do you want to bet?

It might make this little waiting period more interesting.

Now wait.

I spent all my money on the T -shirt.

I got it big so I can sleep on it.

Can you hear me?

I'm almost at the scene.

The remote talk got a flat. My battery's running out. I need you to work.

Work, you stupid...

And as I can tell by the tone of your voice, you are holding something back.

I knew it.

Excuse me, ma 'am, lady, miss. I need to use the phone right away. It's an

emergency situation. I think I'm dying.

Oh, please.

Now, what are you saying here?

Duke's brother was having an affair with Duke's wife?

Well, I guess she figured when Duke was out of town, he was out of town.

I got to go. The walls have ears.

Okay. You can have it, but just don't hog it. Wait, wait. There was an affair?

How do you know that?

How did you get that info about the affair?

I have sources close to Mr. Robinson's law firm. My husband is very connected.

That's really good dirt, isn't it?

Hi, this is Jim.

The executive producer, you idiot.

Now plug me into Sarah.

Sarah. Hi, it's Jim. Can you hear me?

I've got some new information. Now, it's unconfirmed, but it comes right from

the defense team, so I think we should go with it before somebody else does.

Okay, okay, here goes.

I have an exclusive new piece of information which has just come in from

within the Robinson defense team.

Robinson's brother, Larry, was allegedly having an affair with Robinson's wife.

Now, when Duke became aware of this relationship, he says, yet.

Unclear. Wow, Janice's little hunch was true.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. Isn't that a SWAT team in the background?

I think somebody moved in the back seat. This is it. Anything could happen here

at this time. It seems as though... Hold on. Someone's getting out of the car.

Duke Robinson is getting out of the car.

It appears as though he's surrendering to the police.

The authorities have moved in.

They are handcuffing him and leading him away.

So, this is how it ends.

Quietly, peacefully, with no bloodshed.

Gee, now I'm sorry we didn't go and see a movie.

You think it's a good thing that nobody died, don't you?

Disappointing, but at least we have our special weekend to perk us up.

So, you want to start with the usual?

Replace my expired cough syrup and buy me a new toilet bowl brush?

I don't know what I did wrong with you, Mary Margaret. Maybe I shouldn't have

smoked during pregnancy, but we just didn't know back then.

Well, Jack, don't be surprised.

if you feel empty and directionless tomorrow. You know, they interviewed

psychologist on there who said he thinks that there are going to be a lot of

people suffering from Duke withdrawal.

I don't know if they could be okay.

We have a pretty full life.

Yes, we do.

And we're way behind for what we had planned tonight, aren't we?

Horribly. We're going to have to put on all -nighter.

Really? Can you still do that?

What sort of strategy do you think the defense will use?

That's a good question. You know, all the evidence is, you know, purely

circumstantial. They could go with that or, you know, maybe the insanity plea.

I hear they don't have to go with the insanity plea right away, you know. They

can do a wait -and -see kind of thing.

Of course, how's the prosecution going to get a conviction on a guy who played

croquet in the moon?

Steve Campbell.

Hey, when I'm watching this whole Duke thing in a restaurant, I think I've

our star.

It was in a crowd in Battery Park.

I think it might even have been in Capricorn One.

He's very handsome.

Oh, that bacon. Look, that's going to be perfect for the party.

I don't know. I'm going to find him, but I'm going to make it. Bye -bye.