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1
00:00:05,100 --> 00:00:06,100
Thank you, Gorlin.
2
00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:10,720
Helping the grocery shop, carrying in
the groceries, holding the door. I like
3
00:00:10,720 --> 00:00:11,720
that in a young man.
4
00:00:11,740 --> 00:00:12,740
Oh, thank you, Nikki.
5
00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:13,900
Or an old man.
6
00:00:14,020 --> 00:00:15,020
Or an any man.
7
00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:17,900
You know I can hook you up with my Uncle
Otis.
8
00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:19,840
He'll be out in about two years.
9
00:00:21,580 --> 00:00:25,880
Ah, you so crazy. I know you're going to
win that college laugh off.
10
00:00:26,220 --> 00:00:27,220
I'm working on it.
11
00:00:28,420 --> 00:00:29,420
Give me that.
12
00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:31,140
Can't be carrying heavy stuff.
13
00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:33,820
Still got to have my baby one day.
14
00:00:35,260 --> 00:00:38,160
Uh, you better have a wedding ring in
one of those bags.
15
00:00:38,460 --> 00:00:39,740
I got an onion ring.
16
00:00:41,360 --> 00:00:43,580
Come on, baby, we got a movie to catch.
17
00:00:43,880 --> 00:00:45,180
Hold up my little Pikachu.
18
00:00:47,120 --> 00:00:49,020
Vicky, why don't you come to the movie
with me?
19
00:00:49,300 --> 00:00:50,300
Me with y 'all?
20
00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:51,980
Sweetie, it's our date.
21
00:00:52,740 --> 00:00:54,720
I know, it ain't like we going to fool
around.
22
00:00:55,100 --> 00:00:56,039
We not?
23
00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,820
Ah, I got us a hotel room for that.
24
00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:05,700
You're joking, right?
25
00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:02,580
possible that every time I enter the
student union, I run into you.
26
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:05,100
Well, maybe God is trying to tell you
something.
27
00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:07,640
Yeah, stay out of the student union.
28
00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:12,160
Professor, this is Garland. Garland
Rockin', comedian extraordinaire.
29
00:02:12,460 --> 00:02:15,320
www .comedy. Check the website, yo.
30
00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:19,040
Oh, my boyfriend is so interactive.
31
00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:21,280
And so am I.
32
00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:27,360
Kim, can I holler at you for a second?
Excuse us.
33
00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:30,520
Since when did we become a couple?
34
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:33,820
About 2 o 'clock this morning.
35
00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:36,240
What you talking about? We was at
Fatburger.
36
00:02:37,980 --> 00:02:39,920
I know. We shared the same straw.
37
00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:41,560
Because it was the last one.
38
00:02:43,540 --> 00:02:45,000
Are you trying to get out of this?
39
00:02:46,860 --> 00:02:50,900
Nah, it's just all happening so fast. I
mean, a Fatburger, a milkshake. Next
40
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thing you know, I'm engaged.
41
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I accept.
42
00:02:54,700 --> 00:02:55,700
You know what?
43
00:02:55,780 --> 00:02:56,780
Girlfriend is fine.
44
00:02:59,890 --> 00:03:03,510
Okay, baby, we'll talk about the wedding
plans later.
45
00:03:09,150 --> 00:03:12,130
So, Professor, you ever been blindsided
by a woman?
46
00:03:12,390 --> 00:03:13,390
Phew.
47
00:03:13,810 --> 00:03:19,030
Blindsided, run down, deceive, trick,
slick, trip, trap, stalk, bamboozle,
48
00:03:19,030 --> 00:03:23,330
hoodwink, browbeaten, felt up, set up,
let down, squeeze, pinch, goose.
49
00:03:23,910 --> 00:03:25,830
Don't get me started. I could tell
you...
50
00:03:33,900 --> 00:03:35,480
President Fred Rubble. All right.
51
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:42,860
All right, time to bring my next
contestant, Stevie Van Lowe.
52
00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:49,660
Hey, how's everyone doing tonight?
53
00:03:50,020 --> 00:03:51,020
Good.
54
00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:52,800
Anyone out there have a mother?
55
00:03:56,140 --> 00:03:58,260
Got any pictures? I'd like to see what
one looks like.
56
00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:01,740
I mean, not that my mother and I work
close, but I had to make an appointment
57
00:04:01,740 --> 00:04:02,740
get breastfed.
58
00:04:03,210 --> 00:04:06,250
Her idea of a mother -daughter vacation
was to go to Europe and leave me at
59
00:04:06,250 --> 00:04:08,070
home. And my father? How can I respect
him?
60
00:04:08,290 --> 00:04:11,750
He married her. And don't let me get
started on my grandparency because
61
00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:12,750
We won't.
62
00:04:16,470 --> 00:04:17,470
I'm not finished.
63
00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:18,750
You are here.
64
00:04:19,269 --> 00:04:21,329
Give it up for Stevie, the crazy white
girl.
65
00:04:23,470 --> 00:04:26,750
How was I?
66
00:04:27,110 --> 00:04:28,990
I think chicken said it all.
67
00:04:30,490 --> 00:04:32,070
I got three words for you.
68
00:04:34,690 --> 00:04:36,030
that. We're moving right along.
69
00:04:36,490 --> 00:04:40,130
Let's give it up for the comedic
stylings of my man, Garland Rockin.
70
00:04:47,070 --> 00:04:48,330
How's everybody doing out there?
71
00:04:48,650 --> 00:04:53,150
Alright, first of all, I just want to
thank Nubian Entertainment Television
72
00:04:53,150 --> 00:04:54,150
giving us this opportunity.
73
00:04:56,550 --> 00:05:00,050
But you know, personally, I've really
been getting paid in real dollars. These
74
00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:01,770
black dollars are only good at KFC.
75
00:05:05,900 --> 00:05:07,600
What's Marlon Wayans doing up there?
76
00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:10,380
But I ain't one of the Wayans. I'm
funny.
77
00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:16,860
Yup. Well, me and my girl made it
official. We a couple now.
78
00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:21,960
She went and told all her girlfriends,
so now I'm stuck.
79
00:05:24,260 --> 00:05:25,960
But hey, I ain't complaining.
80
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:30,300
Shoot, I like my girl. My last
girlfriend was a big bone woman.
81
00:05:30,620 --> 00:05:31,960
A portly person.
82
00:05:36,590 --> 00:05:42,690
what it is she was fat okay i once took
it to a favorite french restaurant lay
83
00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:49,450
grocery store and see see my only
problem with fat people is they always
84
00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:52,850
like i asked my girl how you get so damn
big she had the nerve to say
85
00:06:43,950 --> 00:06:45,010
The contest is between you and I.
86
00:06:47,790 --> 00:06:49,730
Okay, the judges have selected a winner.
87
00:06:50,090 --> 00:06:52,170
And, uh, it's not Stevie.
88
00:06:54,030 --> 00:06:56,270
Although, personally, I like that bitter
thing.
89
00:06:58,930 --> 00:07:03,170
Representing Santa Monica Junior College
at the world -famous Laughin' Port,
90
00:07:03,330 --> 00:07:06,250
where the winner will get their own
special on newbie entertainment
91
00:07:06,510 --> 00:07:09,330
is my man and your man, Garland Rockett.
Come on, Garland.
92
00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,320
to talk to you about Garland and his
act.
93
00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:30,860
Ooh, it wasn't off the hook?
94
00:07:31,140 --> 00:07:34,420
No, it wasn't. It was offensive to
people. What people?
95
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,180
I didn't have a problem with it.
96
00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:39,160
OK. It was offensive to a certain type
of person.
97
00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:42,680
Oh, you mean fat people, Mama?
98
00:07:44,540 --> 00:07:47,120
I prefer the term large and lovely.
99
00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,640
I always thought you were cool with your
size.
100
00:07:51,060 --> 00:07:54,960
Well, just because I'm cool with it
doesn't mean I like to be made fun of.
101
00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:57,880
They're just jokes.
102
00:07:58,460 --> 00:08:05,160
Good morning, Kim.
103
00:08:06,180 --> 00:08:07,260
Hey, Nikki.
104
00:08:07,620 --> 00:08:09,940
You ready to go get something to eat?
Yeah, I'm starving.
105
00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:13,440
And I cannot wait until we get to the
restaurant. I might be able to find some
106
00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:14,560
new material for my act.
107
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:18,420
I can observe the buffalo grazing at the
all -you -can -eat buffet.
108
00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:28,200
to ease up off those fat jokes.
109
00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:30,280
Oh, come on, Nikki. That's my routine.
110
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:32,760
And you heard the laughs. The audience
loved it.
111
00:08:33,020 --> 00:08:35,840
And besides, you know me. I ain't mean
nothing by it. They're just harmless
112
00:08:35,840 --> 00:08:39,200
jokes. Well, maybe they're harmless to
skinny folks like you.
113
00:08:39,539 --> 00:08:41,400
Oh, come on, Nikki. Won't you lighten
up?
114
00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:46,820
Nothing good with lighting up.
115
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,000
I ain't even mean it like that.
116
00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,580
Garland, you need to change your act.
117
00:08:54,630 --> 00:08:56,710
Wait, hold up. We're talking about my
career, Nikki.
118
00:08:57,010 --> 00:08:58,330
This could be my big break.
119
00:08:58,790 --> 00:09:02,290
No disrespect, but if you can't take the
heat, then you need to get out the...
120
00:09:02,290 --> 00:09:04,030
You know what I mean.
121
00:09:04,230 --> 00:09:05,230
Oh, I'm afraid I do.
122
00:09:05,490 --> 00:09:08,770
So you need to get the... Oh, you know
what I mean. Out in my house.
123
00:09:10,070 --> 00:09:11,070
Nah, nah.
124
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:12,350
Nah, Kim.
125
00:09:12,450 --> 00:09:13,450
It's cool.
126
00:09:13,870 --> 00:09:14,870
See y 'all around.
127
00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:38,260
and change those jokes.
128
00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:40,820
No, Mama. You need to deal with it.
129
00:09:43,860 --> 00:09:45,660
Oh, and I am going to deal with it.
130
00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,200
Mm -hmm.
131
00:09:51,180 --> 00:09:51,620
Now,
132
00:09:51,620 --> 00:09:58,380
we're here
133
00:09:58,380 --> 00:10:01,620
today because we're sick and tired of
being the butt of jokes. Yeah.
134
00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:03,620
And we can't let it continue.
135
00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:04,840
No.
136
00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,400
Oh. Uh, is Miss Parker here?
137
00:10:10,100 --> 00:10:11,100
Come on in.
138
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:16,920
Oh, Professor Ogilvie, what are you
doing here? Well, I saw your flyer about
139
00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:18,020
large and in charge.
140
00:10:18,260 --> 00:10:19,800
You mean down at the Student Union?
141
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:22,080
Well, actually, it was at the Krispy
Kreme Donuts.
142
00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:25,520
Did you bring any with you?
143
00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:28,720
No, I came to offer my support.
144
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:30,460
So you do have some donuts.
145
00:10:32,060 --> 00:10:33,480
Okay, maybe this was a mistake.
146
00:10:34,180 --> 00:10:36,020
No, no, please come in.
147
00:10:36,670 --> 00:10:37,670
Thank you for coming.
148
00:10:37,990 --> 00:10:41,570
Look, I just wanted to let you all know
that you're not alone.
149
00:10:41,910 --> 00:10:45,130
That not everyone thinks that making fun
of large people is funny.
150
00:10:46,550 --> 00:10:50,410
Although I have to admit, that 7 -Eleven
joke, that was pretty funny.
151
00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:52,550
Out by 12 .15.
152
00:10:55,270 --> 00:10:57,270
I mean, I feel your pain.
153
00:10:57,570 --> 00:11:00,630
Oh, sure you do, skinny boy.
154
00:11:01,510 --> 00:11:05,830
No, no, no, no. Now, I was not always
the man you see before you.
155
00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:11,760
I mean, as a child, I remember many
trips to the Sears Husky Boy Department.
156
00:11:14,980 --> 00:11:18,440
Husky? You mean you were? Yes, I was
fat.
157
00:11:19,740 --> 00:11:22,760
I was ridiculed, teased.
158
00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,400
Fat boy, what you got there?
159
00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:37,540
Nothing, man. Just a little something to
hold me over till lunch. Give me that
160
00:11:37,540 --> 00:11:38,540
fat Stanley.
161
00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:41,260
You know a good one. You're supposed to
be on a diet.
162
00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:45,020
I am on a diet. I'm down to a gallon a
day. Now give me fat Stanley.
163
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:47,380
Fat Stanley.
164
00:11:47,580 --> 00:11:48,720
Fat Stanley.
165
00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:50,820
Fat Stanley.
166
00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:56,960
Fat Stanley. Fat Stanley.
167
00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:58,360
You okay, man?
168
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:00,760
It's my fault.
169
00:12:15,660 --> 00:12:16,660
Always got to spend.
170
00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:26,380
I was teased unmercifully all through my
younger years.
171
00:12:27,540 --> 00:12:29,740
Group hug.
172
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:32,800
No, no, no.
173
00:12:33,360 --> 00:12:34,360
I'm fine.
174
00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:35,480
I'm fine.
175
00:12:38,100 --> 00:12:44,620
No, I decided to take control of my
life. Yeah. You know, and change things.
176
00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:46,820
The professor is right.
177
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:18,640
making fun of fat people in my act.
178
00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:23,040
And you know, I thought long and hard
about this situation, and I come to the
179
00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:24,940
agonizing conclusion that
180
00:15:00,170 --> 00:15:01,170
midterm.
181
00:16:54,830 --> 00:16:55,689
They're just jokes.
182
00:16:55,690 --> 00:16:57,310
Well, then find some other jokes.
183
00:16:57,950 --> 00:16:58,949
Just like that.
184
00:16:58,950 --> 00:17:01,290
You think it's that easy? Why don't you
get up here and do it?
185
00:18:29,070 --> 00:18:30,070
I wanted to come by and apologize.
186
00:18:30,470 --> 00:18:33,310
Oh, and I get so flushed with so not
into you.
187
00:18:34,410 --> 00:18:35,410
You're so right.
188
00:18:35,890 --> 00:18:36,890
Can I come in?
189
00:18:37,790 --> 00:18:38,790
Yeah.
190
00:18:40,710 --> 00:18:43,450
Kim, I just really want to apologize
about the other night.
191
00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:45,210
I just got caught up in everything.
192
00:18:45,490 --> 00:18:46,530
Kind of lost my head.
193
00:18:46,970 --> 00:18:47,970
That's cool.
194
00:18:48,310 --> 00:18:50,990
I guess I got a little pushy about the
girlfriend thing.
195
00:18:52,050 --> 00:18:53,050
Just a tad.
196
00:18:53,870 --> 00:18:54,870
Friends.
197
00:19:04,780 --> 00:19:07,820
televisions, laugh off. Give it up for
Miss Nikki Parker.
198
00:19:14,580 --> 00:19:18,760
You know what, ladies?
199
00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,420
This is for all my big girls. One of the
reasons why it's so important that we
200
00:19:22,420 --> 00:19:25,200
hang together, because skinny women
can't understand directions.
201
00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:28,920
They don't follow them. They don't read
very well. When we go to the all -you
202
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:30,360
-can -eat buffet, what does it say?
15536
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