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Lou Rawls? Oh, Lou Rawls? 24 seconds to
curtain, Mr. Rawls. Thank you, Scooter.
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Mr. Rawls, I wanted to tell you that I
greatly respect your talent and I've
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00:00:12,670 --> 00:00:15,150
followed your career from its very
beginning.
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00:00:15,370 --> 00:00:16,369
Thank you, Sam.
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00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:19,290
It's just too bad it has to end here.
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00:00:22,730 --> 00:00:25,670
It's the Muppet Show with our very
special guest star, Mr.
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Lou Rawls.
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00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:51,960
It's time to put on makeup.
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It's time to dress up right.
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It's time to get things started. We're
old men.
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Give us a break.
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00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:02,080
It's time to get things started on the
most sensational, inspirational,
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00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:06,760
celebrational, momentational. This is
what we.
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Hey, tonight's show is going to be a
very special one because our guest star
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the great Mr.
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00:01:26,540 --> 00:01:27,540
Lou Rawls.
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But first, to get things started, here's
our own Fozzie Bear, who will perform
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for you tonight on roller skates. Oh,
man, I think the act needs just a bit
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rehearsal.
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Well, so much for the opening number.
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Now we suddenly arrive at guest star
time.
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Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Lou Rawls.
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I like groovy people.
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I like to be around the groovy, groovy
people, yeah.
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I don't like nobody that's got an ego.
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Don't like to sit around and hold...
conversation with somebody who don't
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where he wants to go.
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Groovy me the simple life full of fun
and joy.
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And you see I'm just a big old country
boy.
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Hey, and I like groovy people.
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I like to be around the groovy, groovy
people.
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Yeah. Groovy people. Well, well, well,
well.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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I tell you.
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Groovy Groovy Groovy
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Groovy
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up for child time folks no more let's
pretend that we're not at home when they
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come knocking on that door I don't like
nosy people you know what I'm talking
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00:03:41,130 --> 00:03:46,970
about nosy folks getting at my business
and things well I went through all of
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that baby and I know the bad feeling
that it brings
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A country boy. And I like groovy people.
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I like to be around the groovy, groovy
people.
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Groovy, groovy, groovy. I like groovy
people, yeah.
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I'm talking about people. I can't hold a
conversation.
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one fantastic singer.
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So am I. Hey, you want to hear me sing?
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Only if you sing solo.
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Solo? Solo, I can't hear.
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Okay,
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nice and groovy, guys. Very groovy.
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Hey, Chief, I thought you said Fozzie
was going to do the opening spot on the
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show. Well, that was the plan, but he
wasn't quite ready, so we switched
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numbers. So what happens now? A
newsflash or Fozzie's roller skating
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00:05:08,460 --> 00:05:09,720
I'll tell the newsman he's on.
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00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,920
Here is a Muppet News flag.
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00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:21,040
Dateline, New York. Medical science has
been baffled by a sudden epidemic of the
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rare disease Mallarditis.
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The illness strikes very quickly and
causes its victim to turn into a duck.
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Mallarditis? That's the silliest thing I
ever...
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And now, Veterinarian's Hospital.
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The continuing story of a quack who has
gone to the dogs.
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On to the next patient.
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What's this? He was here a minute ago.
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Oh, wow. This is happening a lot lately.
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What is?
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Dr. Bob is losing his patience.
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That's untrue. I never lose my patience.
What about the patient you accidentally
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fed nitroglycerin to?
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Him I lost.
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00:06:07,850 --> 00:06:09,190
But I found him again.
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Where? In Iowa, Minnesota, North and
South Dakota.
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That was him all over.
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So, once again, Dr. Bob has come to
nothing.
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Tune in next time when you will hear him
say... Hey, who are you?
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Who? You.
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You know, the voice we keep hearing in
here.
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I'm the announcer.
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I'm the guy who says... And now,
Veterinarian's Hospital, the continuing
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of a quack who has gone to the dark.
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Well, where's the next patient?
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What's this? He was here a minute ago.
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Oh, wow. This is happening a lot lately.
What is?
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Dr. Bob is losing his patience.
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Untrue. I never lose my patience.
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What about the one you fed nitroglycerin
to?
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Him I lost. But I found him again.
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Where? In Maryland, Virginia, North and
South Carolina.
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That's him all over.
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And so Dr.
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Bob has done all the same jokes twice.
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Tune in next time when you will hear
Nurse Janice say, Shall we go for
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No, that would dry my patience.
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You don't have any patience. No. I would
if it weren't for that dumb
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nitroglycerin.
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Hey, Floyd.
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Animal, what's happening?
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Hey, Leroy.
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Hey, good to see you. No, Haps. You
know, I'm just out walking the drummer.
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Walking the drummer? What is he, friend
or foe, man?
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Oh, yeah, well... Ah!
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Ah! Ah! Ah! Lou Ross!
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Lou Ross! Lou Ross!
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Yeah,
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well, he's a big fan, Lou. Oh, yeah?
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Yeah, he bought all your albums.
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Oh, you like them, Animal?
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Ah -ha!
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Delicious!
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Yeah, well, let me tell you something,
Animal. You know, you play the drums so
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good, man. You take the sticks and you
really lay down some great percussion.
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You know what I'm talking about?
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Percussion!
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You sort of have to consider Animal your
basic primitive man.
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You have to know how to talk to him. Oh,
yeah?
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Well, how do you tell a man that his
work with the sticks really is down?
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I mean, he can put some soul in the
bowl. You know what I mean?
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Yeah, okay, that's easy.
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Animal!
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Good drummer. Good drummer.
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Good drummer.
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Yeah.
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Well, listen, let me ask him to say
this. Look, see, I got this long road
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coming up, and I'm sure the drummer, you
think he'd be interested?
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Oh, no, you couldn't take Animal on any
long road trips, dude. Why not, man? The
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cat's good.
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Well, you couldn't get a long enough
chain.
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Chain, chain, chain.
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Hey, come on, Floyd. Just let me discuss
it with you man to man, you know?
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Man to man?
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This dude don't know animal.
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Okay, Lou, it is a chain, but... All
right. Could I just ask one favor? Yeah,
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baby. Yeah, don't let him chase any
cars, okay? Don't let him chase any
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Cars! Oh, I think I blew that game.
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Cars!
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I see. I'll tell him.
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Hey, Kermit? The Swedish chef says he's
not ready to go on. You said he'd be on
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the second half of the show.
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00:09:34,130 --> 00:09:35,130
Hey,
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well, listen, chef. We've had to move
things around a little.
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Kermit!
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In fact, some things are moving around
quite a lot.
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This is on the almost.
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Okay, let's go, Chef. Come on. Okay.
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Okay. Okay. Okay.
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Okay. Okay.
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Okay.
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Okay.
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00:10:27,979 --> 00:10:31,400
Uncle Kermit, somebody, anybody, help!
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00:10:48,330 --> 00:10:50,310
Oh, you say your boyfriend's name is Cy?
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00:10:50,690 --> 00:10:51,690
Cy who?
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00:10:51,990 --> 00:10:52,990
Klops?
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00:10:55,670 --> 00:10:58,530
So, uh, what'd you think of the movie
Jaws?
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00:11:04,150 --> 00:11:07,410
Excuse me, are you the monster who
swallowed my harmonica?
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00:11:11,390 --> 00:11:13,570
So, how are the kids, Flo?
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just came down with the people pox. My
horoscope said I should be
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careful today or some great physical
harm could befall me.
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Ah, that's a lot of silly superstition.
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I love
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to
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linger in the moonlight on Honolulu.
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fond memories cling to me by moonlight,
although I'm far away.
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Boom, boom, and all the beaches, boom,
boom, are full of peaches, boom, boom,
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who bring their ukes along.
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00:12:04,660 --> 00:12:11,080
And in the glimmer of the moonlight,
they love to sing this song.
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00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:15,840
If you get like a ukulele...
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You like to linger where it's shady,
ukulele lady linger too.
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If you kiss a ukulele lady and you
promise ever to be
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true, when she sees another ukulele lady
fooling
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00:12:40,850 --> 00:12:47,550
around with you, maybe she'll cry an
awful lot.
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Maybe she'll find. And maybe not. Maybe
she'll find somebody else.
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Bye and bye.
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When it's cool and shady.
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When it's silly, wicky, wacky.
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If you like a ukulele lady.
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Ukulele lady like a. If you like me
like.
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00:13:36,460 --> 00:13:37,460
In the be - Final!
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00:13:51,150 --> 00:13:51,829
you on the show.
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Hey, thank you, Kermit. It's really a
gas to be here, you know. Oh, well, you
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know, I got all your records back at my
pad.
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00:13:57,730 --> 00:13:58,950
Oh. Pad.
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Frog. Lily pad. That's a little joke
there.
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00:14:03,710 --> 00:14:05,370
Only possibly, Kermit. Only.
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00:14:07,170 --> 00:14:11,710
Hey, listen, Lou. Could you tell us,
what is the secret of singing jazz like
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00:14:11,710 --> 00:14:16,010
do? Well, Kermit, all you have to do
really is just kind of lay back, you
185
00:14:16,010 --> 00:14:20,030
and lay down some golden tones with soul
and style.
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00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:26,480
Sure. You just kind of lay back and lay
down some golden tones with soul and
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00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:27,480
style.
188
00:14:28,820 --> 00:14:31,140
No, it doesn't even sound the same when
I say it.
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00:14:31,780 --> 00:14:35,000
Hey, but listen, would you do a little
bit of that for us right now?
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00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:36,620
No, no, no.
191
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:37,960
No? No.
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00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:42,340
You see, Kermit, you really can't sing
jazz without salt lights, you know, a
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00:14:42,340 --> 00:14:43,340
little atmosphere.
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00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:44,900
And you've got to have a band.
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00:14:45,380 --> 00:14:46,800
Oh, well, listen, you got it.
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00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:53,400
This is an inspiration and an open
invitation, you know, for some soulful
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00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:55,600
syncopation. Hey, does that mean
something good?
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00:14:55,860 --> 00:14:59,340
Yes, it means let things... Wonderful.
I'll be over here.
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00:14:59,580 --> 00:15:00,580
Right.
200
00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:04,560
Back up on my carrom wall. Here I go.
Sing low.
201
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:06,040
Bye. Bye.
202
00:15:06,260 --> 00:15:07,980
Hold it, Floyd. Be cool. Now, wait a
minute.
203
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,920
Somewhere somebody's waiting for me.
Sugar is sweet. So is she. Goodbye.
204
00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:17,600
Bye, you jive. Turkey, you... All right.
The one you can love all understand me.
205
00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:22,780
Oh, what hard luck stories they all each
and everybody has. Maybe make my bed
206
00:15:22,780 --> 00:15:25,720
and light the light. But I might not get
home tonight, chicken.
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00:15:26,940 --> 00:15:27,940
Turkey.
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00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:32,880
Owl. Parakeet. Parrot. Pheasant.
Partridge. Minerbird. Kiwi bird.
209
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:33,959
Jaybird. Redbird.
210
00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,460
Bluebird. Big bird.
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00:15:53,460 --> 00:16:00,060
... ... ... ...
212
00:16:00,060 --> 00:16:01,160
...
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00:16:36,140 --> 00:16:37,480
What, is there a pussycat in here?
214
00:16:39,620 --> 00:16:41,960
Okay, great number. I love that. I love
that.
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00:16:42,540 --> 00:16:46,080
Let's see. Oh, now where's Fozzie? If
he's going to do that roller skating
216
00:16:46,140 --> 00:16:47,140
it'll have to be soon.
217
00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:58,040
Oh, very good, Fozzie. You ready to go
on? I'm ready, Kermit. I'm
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00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:01,640
just sorry I took so long. But I want
you to know it's tough.
219
00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:04,460
Roller skating is very, very difficult.
220
00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:17,280
Easy for you
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00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:18,280
to say.
222
00:17:18,440 --> 00:17:24,940
Welcome again to Muppet Labs, where the
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00:17:24,940 --> 00:17:26,720
future is being made today.
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00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:30,680
Well, our latest development is the
nuclear -powered shaver.
225
00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:36,220
The honor of shaving for the very first
time with a nuclear -powered shaver goes
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00:17:36,220 --> 00:17:38,380
to my faithful lab assistant, Beaker.
227
00:17:38,620 --> 00:17:39,720
Come on in here, Beaker.
228
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:43,160
It's all right. Come on. There you go.
229
00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:51,520
Now, in order to protect Beaker's fluffy
orange hair from nuclear fallout, he
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00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:57,560
will wear this protective helmet, which
is made of solid lead. Bend over,
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00:17:57,660 --> 00:17:58,419
Beaker, here.
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00:17:58,420 --> 00:18:00,440
Come on. Hurry up. Bend over.
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00:18:02,850 --> 00:18:05,370
There. All right. Up you go, Beaker.
234
00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:07,630
Now Beaker is ready for the
demonstration.
235
00:18:15,030 --> 00:18:18,010
Notice how effective the lead helmet is.
236
00:18:18,390 --> 00:18:20,430
Now Beaker doesn't need a shave.
237
00:18:24,450 --> 00:18:27,430
As you may have noticed, Fozzie has
taken up roller skating.
238
00:18:27,630 --> 00:18:30,930
So here he is with funny jokes and
figure eights, Mr. Fozzie.
239
00:18:36,880 --> 00:18:40,180
How about that? I haven't told one joke
and I'm rolling already.
240
00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:46,580
Not bad on a ten -cent pair of skates,
huh?
241
00:18:46,860 --> 00:18:50,860
Speaking of cheapskates... Nice flinch,
Fuzzy.
242
00:18:51,060 --> 00:18:52,080
Thank you, Fuzzy.
243
00:18:53,740 --> 00:18:58,040
Hey, hey, hey. The next joke I'm going
to tell, I'm going to do it while
244
00:18:58,040 --> 00:18:59,060
a figure eight.
245
00:18:59,260 --> 00:19:00,260
Here goes.
246
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:08,050
Speaking of cheapskates, I know a guy so
cheap... When he goes fishing, he puts
247
00:19:08,050 --> 00:19:12,210
a picture of a worm on his hook and he
catches a picture of a fish.
248
00:19:13,130 --> 00:19:14,130
Hey,
249
00:19:15,010 --> 00:19:17,450
this is a great way for Fozzie to do his
material.
250
00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:19,790
Yeah, a moving target is harder to hit.
251
00:19:20,670 --> 00:19:21,990
Oh, yeah? Well, watch this.
252
00:19:22,490 --> 00:19:27,530
I'm going to tell this next joke while
skating, skating backwards and with my
253
00:19:27,530 --> 00:19:30,030
foot in the air, wiggling my ears. Here
goes.
254
00:19:32,590 --> 00:19:33,590
Okay.
255
00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:40,020
Guy walks into a diner. There's a horse
behind the counter. The guy just looks
256
00:19:40,020 --> 00:19:40,859
at the horse.
257
00:19:40,860 --> 00:19:44,180
The horse says, what's the matter?
Surprised to see me here?
258
00:19:44,380 --> 00:19:45,580
And the guy says, yeah.
259
00:19:45,780 --> 00:19:47,540
Did the cow sell the place?
260
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,640
He was doing okay till he fell off the
stage.
261
00:19:53,900 --> 00:19:56,460
Wrong. He was doing okay till he came on
the stage.
262
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:02,020
Did the cow sell the place?
263
00:20:05,450 --> 00:20:09,030
Once again, ladies and gentlemen, this
time backed by the big band of Dr.
264
00:20:09,090 --> 00:20:10,470
here he is, Mr. Lou Roll.
265
00:20:19,130 --> 00:20:26,130
I've been all over the world And I've
seen all kinds of girls But
266
00:20:26,130 --> 00:20:29,270
baby, let me tell you that you're
267
00:20:42,570 --> 00:20:44,310
you that you're the one.
268
00:20:45,430 --> 00:20:48,910
I'm trying to tell you that you're the
one.
269
00:20:50,590 --> 00:20:52,590
You are the one.
270
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:58,750
You're the one. Hey baby, you are the
one.
271
00:21:00,170 --> 00:21:06,950
You know that I and all kinds of ladies
do each and everything
272
00:21:06,950 --> 00:21:07,950
to me.
273
00:21:08,330 --> 00:21:11,790
But baby, let me tell you that
274
00:21:15,590 --> 00:21:22,410
I said, because you did something to me
nobody else has ever done.
275
00:22:11,500 --> 00:22:12,600
Ask me another.
276
00:22:12,860 --> 00:22:16,860
Well, that's about all the time we have,
but before we go... I'm going now.
277
00:22:18,300 --> 00:22:22,340
As I was saying, before we go, let's
have a warm thank you to our special
278
00:22:22,340 --> 00:22:24,080
star, ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Lou
Rose.
279
00:22:48,490 --> 00:22:53,130
Tomorrow at 7 on The Muppet Show, Julie
Andrews performs alongside a gang of
280
00:22:53,130 --> 00:22:56,590
yodeling Muppets and serenades Kermit
with a special song.
281
00:22:56,990 --> 00:23:02,150
Coming up next on Happy Days, Richie
Posse and Mel start out cruising and end
282
00:23:02,150 --> 00:23:03,150
streaking.
283
00:23:15,290 --> 00:23:17,050
I love tonight's show.
284
00:23:17,490 --> 00:23:20,730
Really? Of course not. Just wanted to
see if I could say it.
22703
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