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Bernadette Peters?
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Oh, 15 seconds to curtain, Miss Peters.
Thanks, Scooter, and thank the Swedish
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chef for sending in this lovely chicken
sandwich.
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00:00:12,460 --> 00:00:16,160
Suddenly, I'm not hungry.
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I do sing and dance occasionally, so
you'll know I'm not just another pretty
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face.
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Tell me, my love, about the opening
number.
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It is a duet.
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That's true.
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I wish you told me earlier. I don't have
time to learn the lyrics.
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Oh, that's okay. I'm doing it with Miss
Mousy.
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00:01:53,930 --> 00:01:55,090
Miss Mousy?
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00:02:04,940 --> 00:02:07,380
I love you when you know I've been a
liar all my life.
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00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:12,240
You've had that reputation since you
were a youth. I must have been insane to
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00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:13,400
think that you'd tell the truth.
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But how could you believe me when I said
we'd marry when you know I'd rather
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hang than have a wife?
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I know you said I'll make you mine.
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00:02:22,340 --> 00:02:26,660
But who would know that you would go for
that old line? How could you believe me
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when I said I love you when you know
I've been a liar?
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leave a fellow baloney phony like me.
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00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:16,600
Say, how about the time you went to
Indiana?
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I was lying. I was down in Alabama.
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You said you had some business you had
to complete.
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What I was doing, I would be a cad to
repeat.
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00:03:25,660 --> 00:03:29,500
Well, what about the evenings you were
with your mother? I was roughing with
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another honey lamb.
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To think you swore our love was real.
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00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,760
But baby, let us not forget that I'm
a...
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How could you believe me when I said I
love you when you know I've been alive?
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Nobody ever notices me.
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Uncle Kermit?
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Okay, come on, hurry up.
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00:04:43,350 --> 00:04:45,990
The number's about to start. Get on
stage. Get on stage.
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Attract whoever I go on. I want a
feature part in the show.
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Oh, rats.
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00:04:53,790 --> 00:04:57,390
And now, ladies and gentlemen, one of
the loveliest ladies in all of show
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00:04:57,390 --> 00:05:01,650
business. Kermit, you're not bringing
that Miss Mousy back, are you? No, this
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00:05:01,650 --> 00:05:02,970
our guest star, Bernadette Peters.
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00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:05,210
Well, you're not singing with her, are
you?
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00:05:05,900 --> 00:05:08,060
She's working with some of our big,
ugly, shaggy beasts.
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Sounds like Miss Mousey to me.
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You get out of here. Ladies and
gentlemen, the beautiful Miss Bernadette
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Peterson.
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Take a little one step, two step, three
step, then a little dip like this.
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Here's a step we can't afford.
47
00:07:54,919 --> 00:07:55,919
Oh, gee.
48
00:07:56,420 --> 00:07:59,720
I'm so small, they don't even see me
most of the time.
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00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:04,780
And then when they do, they don't think
I can do anything right.
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00:08:05,620 --> 00:08:07,200
Well, I'll show them.
51
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:08,640
I'm running away.
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00:08:09,180 --> 00:08:13,080
The next time they turn around and don't
see me, I'll be gone.
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Then they'll see I can... do something
right. Oh, rats.
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00:08:21,860 --> 00:08:28,820
Now, Veterinarian's Hospital, the
continuing story of a quack who's gone
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00:08:28,820 --> 00:08:29,980
to the dogs.
56
00:08:31,980 --> 00:08:33,760
Oh, here, Dr.
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00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,059
Bob, here's your next patient.
58
00:08:47,470 --> 00:08:48,470
Half triple D?
59
00:08:48,590 --> 00:08:49,790
That's about the size of it.
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00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:55,770
Dr. Bob, what are you going to start on?
The shoestring. A lot of people start
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00:08:55,770 --> 00:08:56,770
on a shoestring.
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00:08:56,850 --> 00:08:58,470
What do you think, Dr. Bob?
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00:08:58,710 --> 00:09:00,310
Simple. It's arsenic poisoning.
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00:09:00,990 --> 00:09:03,130
Arsenic? Sure. Just look at this old
lace.
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00:09:03,350 --> 00:09:04,950
Arsenic and old lace? Dr.
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00:09:07,030 --> 00:09:08,670
Bob, Dr. Bob, that's an old show.
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00:09:09,010 --> 00:09:11,530
Well, that's an old shoe. Well, that's
an old joke.
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00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:19,620
Stick out your tongue and say, ah.
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00:09:23,380 --> 00:09:27,680
Dr. Bob, that tongue has a coat on it.
Of course, it's cold outside.
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00:09:28,060 --> 00:09:29,060
Oh,
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the leather outside is frightful.
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00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:33,960
Dr.
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00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:38,280
Bob, you're not going to sing a song
now, are you? Why not? There's no
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like shoe business.
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00:09:40,740 --> 00:09:42,500
So, once again, Dr.
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Bob is barking up the wrong shoe tree.
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00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:50,180
nurse, piggy nurse, Janice and Dr.
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00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:55,060
Bob sing, He'll never walk away.
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00:09:59,860 --> 00:10:01,840
We'll be right back with more.
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00:12:01,100 --> 00:12:06,820
the eagle will now read a fable which
should serve as a moral lesson to us
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00:12:08,180 --> 00:12:13,600
Once upon a time, there was an ant and a
grasshopper.
82
00:12:14,500 --> 00:12:21,340
It was warm and sunny where they lived,
but the ant worked day and
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00:12:21,340 --> 00:12:28,020
night from dawn to dusk, storing food
for the long, hard winter he
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00:12:28,020 --> 00:12:29,020
knew would come.
85
00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:34,400
can strive for all that matter in this
life.
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00:12:35,140 --> 00:12:38,720
Oh, the ant is a wonderful character.
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00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:46,520
But meanwhile, the lazy, pleasure
-loving grasshopper sang and danced
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00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:48,000
with appalling abandon.
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00:12:48,500 --> 00:12:52,840
Winter will fall and snow will come, but
now it's time to have some fun.
90
00:12:54,500 --> 00:12:55,880
Shocking, shocking.
91
00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:01,220
As expected, Winter came.
92
00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:03,620
Very nice.
93
00:13:04,380 --> 00:13:11,100
And then it was, dear listeners, that
the
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00:13:11,100 --> 00:13:15,420
grasshopper drove his sports car to
Florida and the ant got stepped on.
95
00:13:15,900 --> 00:13:16,900
What?
96
00:13:19,820 --> 00:13:20,820
Wait,
97
00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:25,140
wait, wait, wait, wait. That was not in
the script. Someone change it.
98
00:13:29,230 --> 00:13:30,470
That's Upper Grove to Florida.
99
00:13:31,130 --> 00:13:32,610
The ant got stepped on.
100
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:35,390
Will you stop that?
101
00:13:36,230 --> 00:13:37,970
Why are they picking on us tonight?
102
00:13:38,350 --> 00:13:39,350
I don't know.
103
00:13:43,390 --> 00:13:45,050
Hello, Miss Peters.
104
00:13:45,510 --> 00:13:47,850
Oh, hello, Robin. I didn't see you.
105
00:13:48,150 --> 00:13:52,550
Eh, most people don't. Listen, I'm
running away from home, but I did want
106
00:13:52,550 --> 00:13:53,550
stop and say goodbye.
107
00:13:53,790 --> 00:13:55,410
Oh, you're running away from home?
108
00:13:55,670 --> 00:13:56,670
How come?
109
00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:59,580
Because nobody notices me around here.
110
00:14:44,490 --> 00:14:45,490
Deep enough.
111
00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:51,700
Funny you should mention it, Robin. You
know, I was just thinking the same
112
00:16:51,700 --> 00:16:52,740
thing. Oh.
113
00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:58,740
Curtain opens, and I'm standing there in
a spotlight.
114
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:05,900
The music swells, and I sing, A way out
here they've got a name. No, no, no,
115
00:17:05,980 --> 00:17:09,980
no, no. They call the wind Mariah? Yeah,
great, huh? Robin, that's ridiculous.
116
00:17:10,319 --> 00:17:13,700
No, no, no. Listen, I have a cute little
song here that's much more fitting to a
117
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,599
frog your age. It's called I'm Five.
118
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:18,680
It's called Cute and Yucky.
119
00:17:40,940 --> 00:17:44,320
Welcome again to Muppet Labs, where the
future is being made today.
120
00:17:44,860 --> 00:17:48,620
Dr. Bunsen Honeydew here with news to
set you a quiver.
121
00:17:49,340 --> 00:17:51,340
Beaker, Beaker, dear lad, come over
here.
122
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:55,160
Oh, Beaker, you forgot the beaker.
123
00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:57,200
Now, get the beaker, Beaker.
124
00:17:58,500 --> 00:17:59,500
Come on.
125
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:04,100
You are about to see the first sample
ever isolated of the new element,
126
00:18:04,220 --> 00:18:07,800
Bunsonium, contained in this selfsame
beaker here.
127
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:11,920
for Bunsonium.
128
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:16,780
We already know that it does not remove
paint, it isn't a good glue, and when
129
00:18:16,780 --> 00:18:20,320
used as a shampoo, it produces unusual
side effects.
130
00:18:20,620 --> 00:18:21,620
Right, Beaker?
131
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:29,920
So today, we begin an experiment to see
what Bunsonium does when taken
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00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:30,920
internally.
133
00:18:32,340 --> 00:18:36,460
My assistant, Beaker here, will now
drink the Bunsonium.
134
00:18:37,060 --> 00:18:39,440
Oh, that's all right. There, there,
Beaker.
135
00:18:39,820 --> 00:18:43,760
Just take a teensy little sip at first
and remember not to get carried away and
136
00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:44,920
gulp the whole thing.
137
00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:46,700
Go ahead.
138
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:48,280
It's all right.
139
00:18:48,900 --> 00:18:49,900
Go on.
140
00:18:55,060 --> 00:19:00,560
Good. And now, in just a few moments, we
shall know exactly what Bunsonium does.
141
00:19:20,030 --> 00:19:21,630
and pump you back up.
142
00:19:24,750 --> 00:19:29,390
Well, it's introduction time, so here he
is, my own cute little nephew, Robin,
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00:19:29,510 --> 00:19:30,910
singing, I'm Five.
144
00:19:38,350 --> 00:19:40,430
I'm five, I'm five.
145
00:19:40,650 --> 00:19:42,330
I'm a big fog now, I'm five.
146
00:19:42,690 --> 00:19:46,430
I can dress myself, I don't need mom to
help me anymore.
147
00:19:46,930 --> 00:19:51,230
And when I sit in my father's chair, my
feet... can reach the floor. Almost.
148
00:19:51,450 --> 00:19:52,189
I'm five.
149
00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:53,190
I'm five.
150
00:19:53,310 --> 00:19:55,150
I'm a big frog now. I'm five.
151
00:19:55,370 --> 00:20:01,130
My mother doesn't spank me just for
going without a hat. She knows darn well
152
00:20:01,130 --> 00:20:03,410
run away cause I'm too old for that.
153
00:20:03,930 --> 00:20:05,730
What does she think? I'm three?
154
00:20:06,210 --> 00:20:07,350
Not me.
155
00:20:08,130 --> 00:20:09,870
What does she think? I'm four?
156
00:20:10,590 --> 00:20:11,890
I'm more than four.
157
00:20:12,190 --> 00:20:14,030
I'm even more than four.
158
00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:55,020
Okay,
159
00:20:55,620 --> 00:21:00,060
and now let's go down home for a little
singing, a little banjo picking, and a
160
00:21:00,060 --> 00:21:02,500
little applejack with the lovely Miss
Bernadette Peter.
161
00:21:08,620 --> 00:21:13,820
Lived by the apple orchard in a little
old orchard shack. His name was Jackson
162
00:21:13,820 --> 00:21:14,820
Taylor.
163
00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:35,380
But you can only find out how to enter
during Nick in the Afternoon. That's
164
00:23:35,380 --> 00:23:38,480
weekdays at 3, 2 Central, right here on
Nickelodeon.
165
00:23:39,180 --> 00:23:42,360
Now stay tuned for The Partridge Family,
next on Nick at Night.
166
00:23:52,660 --> 00:23:55,720
Seriously, what did you think of Miss
Mousy? I loved her. Me too.
167
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:57,460
What? No, we didn't.
13323
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