All language subtitles for One On One s04e09 Who Brought the Jive Turkey

Good news, baby. The Detroit airport was
snowed in, so I don't have to go there

to cover the game.

But, Daddy, the Thanksgiving game is
huge.

Doesn't that mean Rania will cover the
game by herself and get all the

attention, making her more popular than
you on your own show?

Oh, man, I spent four hours on the
runway trying to forget that. It only

you four seconds to bring me down. You
more like your mama every day.

Well, look at it on the bright side. At
least you have the holiday off, and

Mom's on the other side of the world.

Ooh, I do have a lot to be thankful for.

And I get to spend Thanksgiving with my
favorite girl.

Well, you get to spend Thanksgiving
morning with your favorite girl. And

she's spending the rest of Thanksgiving
with Arneza's spirit.

Baby, now that I'm here, you don't have
to spend Thanksgiving with those people.

But I want to.

Baby, it's just you and me. You don't
have to lie.

It's Arnaz's first Thanksgiving living
away from his mom, and he really doesn't

want to be alone.

So I'm going to make the Thanksgiving
perfect for him. All right, fine.

Invite the boy. But does Spirit have to
come?

Well, Daddy, you do know it is our first
Thanksgiving together as a couple. But

if you want us to next to Spirit and
watch Arnaz and I feed each other turkey

all day, then by all means, join us.

All right, fine.

Have dinner with your friends. But
remember, you owe me a holiday.

All right, Daddy. Flag Day is all yours.

Sometimes in the dark, you can feel all
by yourself.

But I have a partner, but I can't tell
no one else.

So don't isolate yourself when there's
nobody else.

You remember Butter, right? From New
York?

He's my new roommate.

What happened to your dreams about
making it in New York?

They're still there.

I'm not anymore.

There.

Angel.

And he's joining our band.

How cool is that?

Uh, Spirit, can you and Butter go
outside and grab the rest of the

We got all the groceries.

Well, then maybe he can help you bring
in all the CDs from the car.

What are you talking about? Spirit,
just...

Come on, Butter, but you got ten
minutes. It's cold out there. I don't

ash up and start looking like him.

Our mess.

Sweetie, you should have told me that
Butter was going to be here. I only have

place settings for three.

Who cares?

What's a place setting?

Look, I'm not used to making a big deal
about Thanksgiving.

Back home, I was just happy when my mom
didn't baste a turkey or herself with

Crown Royal.

own tradition.

So why don't you start by throwing away
the pizza boxes?

Oh, I can't. That's Butter's luggage.

Look. A hot pie and a hot therapist.

I'll take a slice of each a la mode.

I don't remember offering either.

Wait, what are you doing here? I thought
I just saw you on TV with Rania

covering the game.

Oh. Oh, no, no, no, that's not you.

That's Denzel Washington.

She's talking to Denzel Washington.

Oh, though I can't see how you'd mistake
him for me.

Yeah, I need a new TV.

So, can I have a piece of pie?

No, this pie is not for you. It's for a
support group I'm hosting.

Oh, you need a shoulder to cry on? I
have broad ones. Come here, girl.

Give it a rest.

No, I'm filling in for a colleague who
hosts these lonely holiday parties. And

since my family's in Seattle, I'm
available.

Oh, I've been waiting to hear those
words.

Why would you want to spend your
holidays with a bunch of losers, you

Wouldn't you want to spend it with a
winner?

Sure. Do you know one?

Wait, wait, let me guess. Rihanna didn't
invite you to her dinner at Arnaz's, so

you have nowhere to go. Oh, please,
girl. Look at me. I'm...

Handsome, successful,

and I look good with a turkey leg in my
hand.

How could I not have somewhere to go on
Thanksgiving?

Look, I just stopped by to wish my
friend a happy turkey day.

Oh, well, that's sweet of you. And if
you weren't so busy, I'd entertain the

idea of you, me, and the butterball.

a turkey. Now, isn't that redundant?

You gotta be finished. See, at the
dining, I'd put on some music, yeah, and

then I'd pour you a nice glass of wine,
and then I'd slowly massage your

shoulders. Come on now, I don't have
time.

No. Oh.

That does feel good.

I think my pot's boiling.

Yeah, when I get it going, you can't
fight it.

No, no, no, no. Really, really, my pot's
boiling. I'm making some gravy. So,

buddy, I got some cooking to do. Oh, all
right.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Same to you. Yeah.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Hello.

Hey, Fitzy.

No, we're not doing anything.

Yeah, bring everybody.

A little turkey with, I think, a yams.

And some football.

This is what I call Thanksgiving.

And this is what I call domino.

Ha, look at you, Ron. You're stuck
interviewing the lion's mascot.

Wait a minute.

That's no lion.

You're talking to John Madden.

I'm talking to the screen.

Why am I talking to the screen?

Why am I talking to myself?

What's the matter? You still looking for
someone for your menage a butterball?

Very cute.

No, I came out for some of that sweet
potato pie. And don't worry, I won't

disturb your music.

No,

you're not interrupting anything.

We're just about to get started. Come on
in.

Hey, everybody.

all these women? Well, not all of them.

I don't know her.

That's Washington. How that's a boy.

You lifebreaker.

After you stole my heart, I lost my
confidence, my dignity, and my job.

Now I'm a broke accountant thanks to
you, mister.

And don't cash that check for two weeks.

This is gonna be interesting.

Oh, no, it's not. It's gonna be quick
and boring. Can I have that pot of gold,

please? No, no, no, no, no, no.

Flex Washington.

Mr. Love Machine.

Mr. Romance.

The king of putting it down.

Well, uh, obviously, you know me. Do I
know you?

Uh, flight 116 to Dallas.

I gave you your wings.

Four from Fort Worth.

My, you've grown.

Flex, obviously these women are hurting
because of you. Let's try to be a little

bit more sensitive.

And Judy, please put my candlestick
back, okay?

What do you need two for? Your lights
work.

I don't know why y 'all are tripping. I
was always the perfect gentleman.

Oh, yeah.

He was the perfect gentleman, right,
ladies?

At least in the beginning.

Yeah, that's how he traps you. First, he
takes you out for a romantic dinner.

Orders the best wine.

Only one bottle, though.

Then he massages your shoulders, gets
what he wants, then disappears.

Really? Isn't this interesting, Flex?

What do you have to say about this? It's
not true.

And I don't mean to break up this little
war party.

But I gots to roll. Happy Thanksgiving.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So you're
just going to leave?

I'm not going to stay here so y 'all can
carve me up into little pieces and feed

me to Liza.

Well, I, for one, cannot wait to hear
what these ladies have to say about my

good neighbor and friend.

All right. All right. Well, you know
what? Maybe I should stay so that the

isn't distorted by this bitter pack of
pitties.

prove to y 'all that there's not one
relationship that I am ashamed of.

Hello?

Am I late? Not late enough.

Flex? What are you doing here? I thought
you were going to dinner with your

mama. Why lie?

I'm lonely, Flex.

I mean, Candy's gone, and my mama said
that she was spitting Thanksgiving out

town at her boyfriend's. Man, that's
only in D .C. That's not even an hour

I'm just telling you what they told me.

What are you doing here?

Well, it seems by some coincidence, Flex
has dated most of the women in this

room. No coincidence?

I mean, Flex has dated most of the women
in Baltimore.

Man. I really like the spinach.

Those are collard greens.

I'm sorry. My mom's white.

Yo, I'm really feeling Charlie, dude.
You were right. She's hot.

What? Uh, I think she was a hot singer.

Let's crack this party started.

No. You mean, let's get this party
cracking.

No, no, no, no, no, no. There will be no
cracking.

This is Thanksgiving, and none of you
are even invited.

Brianna, these are my friends.

my house there's plenty of tofurkey
there not you arnaz

i was just saying

i should have known he was a man when he
looked me straight in the face and said

when i look into your eyes i see a
better me

he said that to me too

Only he wasn't looking in my eyes when
he said it.

Flex, I am learning a lot about you. And
I am definitely sensing a pattern here.

A pattern? There's no pattern here.

There's no plaid, no polka dot, no
argyle. The only pattern I see here is

Is y 'all crazy?

Oh, no, there's a pattern all right. He
winded down me, too. And then had the

nerve to stand me up on my birthday.

That was the first time I ate a whole
cake by myself.

Do you see a problem here?

Uh, yeah.

Y 'all need to get some more muffins
before Liza bites her fingers off.

Look, I didn't tell y 'all to go out
with me, all right? It was your choice.

Yeah, well, who wouldn't choose you,
Flex?

I mean, you say everything a girl wants
to hear to charm her into going out with

you. And when she does, the hunt's over
and you're done with her.

Oh, wait, wait, wait. Come on. That's
not true.

My friend, thank you. Mm -hmm. Sometimes
I'll sleep with you, then have me drive

you home.

Familiar. Listen, a man can change.

Some of y 'all may not know this, but I
was engaged last year. Oh, right.

Listen,

no, no, but it ended because I realized
that we were lovers and never really

friends.

And after being friends with a certain
woman for the past three months, I've

learned a lot about the way women feel
and a little bit about myself, too.

I cry too, you know.

I may look perfect, but I'm not.

God, he's good.

Maybe I should give him and Jenny Craig
another chance. No.

Don't fall for it, girl. He is nothing
but a tall glass of chocolate lies.

Come on, ladies.

You know, Flex does have a point. People
can change.

That's right, and y 'all need to change.

Y 'all need to stop pointing the finger
at me and point the finger at

yourselves. And if you got salt on it,
don't point it at Liza.

Look,

I think what Flex is trying to say is as
much as we want to blame him, and he is

partly to blame, we can't let men take
advantage of us. Now, we all need to

examine what our relationships with Flex
say about how much we love ourselves.

You know?

When you stop to think about it, he's
just like us, alone.

I mean, it is Thanksgiving, and he is
here.

So I say we forget about Flex and get on
with our lives.

So what do we do now?

It's Thanksgiving.

Won't we join hands and give thanks for
finally getting over Flex?

Look, I'm just trying to help y 'all to
let go.

Let me say a prayer for y 'all, okay?

Dear Lord, please let these lonely,
bitter, soon -to -be -spinster

women get over the very thing they
desire most, flex.

Are

you

done tripping in there?

stripping. I can't believe you ruined
Thanksgiving.

All I wanted to do was chill out with my
friends.

I just can't believe you're still
thinking I when it's supposed to be we.

If it's supposed to be we, how come you
never asked me what I wanted? You never

asked me what I wanted to eat. You never
asked me who I wanted to invite. You

just made plans expecting me to go along
for the ride.

Next stop of Brianna's Thanksgiving
fantasy, burnt marshmallows.

Two spirits who care.

Look, Arnaz, I was just trying to make
it a traditional Thanksgiving.

The kind you and I never had growing up.
I just wanted everything to be perfect.

Look, baby, nothing's ever going to be
perfect.

I learned that much from my family.

Sure, we'll argue, but it's not going to
change anything.

What's important is that we're together.

And I still love you.

Even after I broke your plate?

Hey, guys, no one wanted Tofurky, so can
we crack this party started?

Judy! Um, that's my coat.

Oh, my bad. Yeah.

Oh, wow.

How'd that get there?

We can work on that, okay?

Well, uh, hey.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Let me help you with those.

So, uh, now that everybody's gone, um...

You didn't buy any of that, did you?

Uh, no.

No, I didn't.

Especially that part about you changing,
you know?

I was just starting to feel you.

You almost had me.

Wait, what are you talking about?

You're gonna believe an alcoholic, a
Jenny Craig reject, and a klepto over

Well, Flex, your reputation is pretty
clear. I mean, you are all about the

chase. Oh, come on now. We are both
grown -ups here.

Now, I've broken a few hearts, and my
heart's been broken.

I get the feeling that you've done your
damage in your day, too.

Who, me?

Oh, come on now. My life has been hung
out to dry here tonight.

Now, give me the worst thing. What's the
worst thing you've ever done, friend to

friend?

Come on now.

Nope, nothing.

Oh, come on.

I know you a little better than that.
You can't play a player.

Okay, okay, fine.

I pretended to be drunk, though I could
make out with my boyfriend's twin

brother.

Say what?

I wanted to see if there was a
difference.

That's bad, Danielle. That's real bad.

But, um, I like bad ladies.

Okay, Sammy.

Well, okay, your turn.

Man, I can't top twins. That's freaky
even for me.

Really? Well, unless, of course, you
count the Thompson triplets.

Ah. See, that was Lena, Dina, and Tina.

Ah, they were the best babysitters a boy
could ever have.

You know what? I still can't believe you
spent your whole Thanksgiving with a

group of women who hate you.

Ah, they don't hate me anymore.

They're all in a better place.

You can't keep following me around like
this.

Love you too, Netta.