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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,879 --> 00:00:06,580 Last time on One on 1. Oh, great party the other night. People are still 2 00:00:06,580 --> 00:00:08,300 about it. So where's your girl Natasha? 3 00:00:08,740 --> 00:00:09,479 Where's your boy Louis? 4 00:00:09,480 --> 00:00:10,459 I miss you. 5 00:00:10,460 --> 00:00:11,460 I miss you too. 6 00:00:13,740 --> 00:00:14,740 No, no, no. 7 00:00:15,120 --> 00:00:16,119 You should stop. 8 00:00:16,219 --> 00:00:17,220 You're getting married. 9 00:00:17,420 --> 00:00:19,840 Maybe I owe it to myself to be sure. 10 00:00:20,300 --> 00:00:22,780 Do you really want to know what happened with Natasha in your bedroom? 11 00:00:23,020 --> 00:00:25,720 Nothing. She broke up with me and hasn't spoken to me since. 12 00:00:26,080 --> 00:00:27,480 Oh, black... 13 00:00:27,770 --> 00:00:29,550 You swore you would be here. 14 00:00:29,990 --> 00:00:32,210 Tanya, sorry I'm late. You up? 15 00:00:36,630 --> 00:00:38,310 She made filet mignon. 16 00:00:57,320 --> 00:00:58,820 You just tried to cook me. What were you thinking? 17 00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:05,099 Well, I fell asleep, and when I woke up, I saw this big menacing silhouette, and 18 00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:09,100 I have seen too many movies where a cute girl like me living alone ends up being 19 00:01:09,100 --> 00:01:15,980 a cute dead girl dying alone, so naturally I... Oh, baby, I am so 20 00:01:15,980 --> 00:01:19,320 sorry. But where were you? I was waiting up for you all night. 21 00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:21,640 I was doing father stuff with Brian and the kids. 22 00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:24,620 Oh, you're such a good daddy. 23 00:01:25,420 --> 00:01:26,420 You know what? 24 00:01:27,370 --> 00:01:30,490 I make it up to you with something tall and icy. 25 00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:32,510 What, you got my ex -wife in the closet? 26 00:01:33,470 --> 00:01:35,630 No. Skip and get naked. 27 00:01:36,110 --> 00:01:37,410 Can't I just get naked? 28 00:01:38,590 --> 00:01:44,290 No, baby. It's a combination of herbs designed to give you more bounce. 29 00:01:45,410 --> 00:01:46,470 In your bounce. 30 00:01:48,470 --> 00:01:50,090 Bounce me and I'll bounce you back. 31 00:01:54,710 --> 00:01:56,150 Wait a minute. 32 00:01:57,050 --> 00:01:58,050 Should we be doing this? 33 00:01:58,150 --> 00:02:01,130 I mean, you're engaged, and if I were your fiancée, I'd kill me. 34 00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:05,150 You're right. It would just be wrong. 35 00:02:05,810 --> 00:02:07,590 Man, we'd never be able to live with ourselves. 36 00:02:09,310 --> 00:02:10,310 What are you doing? 37 00:02:10,830 --> 00:02:14,370 Well, you've been living with yourself this long. One more night won't hurt. 38 00:02:14,430 --> 00:02:15,430 you're going to play around. 39 00:02:27,020 --> 00:02:28,780 to let you down when there's nobody 40 00:02:56,840 --> 00:02:57,840 I gotta go. 41 00:02:58,020 --> 00:03:01,020 But it's early, and Mama is making breakfast. 42 00:03:01,620 --> 00:03:05,460 Baby, I would love to stay, but I've been here all weekend. I've got a child 43 00:03:05,460 --> 00:03:06,439 look after. 44 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:07,680 Rihanna is fine. 45 00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:09,900 She's at the little gypsy girl's house. 46 00:03:10,920 --> 00:03:12,120 Where are my keys? 47 00:03:12,500 --> 00:03:17,340 But I was gonna make my world -famous French toast and serve it on my stomach, 48 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:20,780 and you were gonna be in charge of pouring the syrup. 49 00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:25,160 Baby, we have gone through three bottles this weekend, okay? I really have to 50 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:26,240 go, okay? Keys! 51 00:03:26,730 --> 00:03:30,970 Okay. Well, why don't you retrace your steps? And while you're doing that, I'll 52 00:03:30,970 --> 00:03:32,950 be frenching my toe. 53 00:03:35,230 --> 00:03:36,230 Lord, 54 00:03:43,250 --> 00:03:45,030 help me. She's feeling me too much. 55 00:03:46,670 --> 00:03:47,670 Oh, 56 00:03:48,470 --> 00:03:49,470 man. 57 00:04:10,860 --> 00:04:14,760 Okay, how about I go to work, spend some time with Brianna, and then I'll come 58 00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:19,540 back later to tuck you in. Okay, one time. What should I wear? 59 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:20,839 Seven and nothing. 60 00:04:25,940 --> 00:04:27,020 Three and that's it. 61 00:04:27,940 --> 00:04:34,560 Four! Look at him, 62 00:04:34,680 --> 00:04:38,540 surrounded by a bunch of hoochies, with his braids and his javelin. 63 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:20,779 I'm asking for you. 64 00:05:20,780 --> 00:05:21,780 Okay. 65 00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:26,600 Dang, girl, it's on the braids. I left my emergency glue at home. 66 00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:30,260 All right, I'll ask him. 67 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:38,800 Wait, I... Arnaz, baby, your coat looks a little low on ice. 68 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:39,920 How about I hook you up? 69 00:05:40,220 --> 00:05:43,180 Now, remember, Ginger, I like the round cubes, not the half moons. 70 00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:47,560 So... 71 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:53,780 cute girl to the main moon like that? 72 00:05:54,380 --> 00:05:55,380 I haven't decided. 73 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:57,600 I might have somebody else in mind. 74 00:05:58,780 --> 00:05:59,780 Really? 75 00:06:00,020 --> 00:06:01,020 Are you going with Louis? 76 00:06:01,900 --> 00:06:03,560 Uh, I haven't decided. 77 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,040 I might have someone else in mind, too. 78 00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:07,700 Really? 79 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:08,960 Like who? 80 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:11,760 Excuse. 81 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:15,920 I'm sorry, baby. They didn't have any round cubes, but I could lick the edges 82 00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:16,920 off the square ones. 83 00:06:17,180 --> 00:06:18,420 Oh, you'd do that for me? 84 00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:20,660 Mm -hmm. All right, here you go, baby. Take care of that. 85 00:06:25,580 --> 00:06:28,320 Where were we? Oh, yes. So, who's taking me to the dance? 86 00:06:29,740 --> 00:06:36,500 Uh, well, um... Let's just say, if you're a fan of Little Bow Wow, you 87 00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:37,500 want to get there early. 88 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:20,840 That Tanya is Sparrow. 89 00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:22,480 I love you. 90 00:07:24,920 --> 00:07:25,920 Oh, my God. 91 00:07:26,420 --> 00:07:27,840 She shrunk in her head for me. 92 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:30,680 How did I get here, man? 93 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:34,840 I ran into her at a club. We realized we missed each other, got together for one 94 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:36,900 weekend. But I didn't expect any of this. 95 00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:38,200 Come on, man. 96 00:07:38,420 --> 00:07:41,640 You knew she was weak for you, and you went over there anyways and activated 97 00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:42,780 little love senses. 98 00:07:44,060 --> 00:07:47,540 You unmade her bed. Now you have to lie there without any covers, my brother. 99 00:07:50,410 --> 00:07:52,250 Hey, man, I've been Tanya, all right? 100 00:07:52,870 --> 00:07:54,970 Dissed, dismissed, and set aside. 101 00:07:55,770 --> 00:07:59,950 Left alone in a motel room with nothing but a wig, a support bra, and some Hugo 102 00:07:59,950 --> 00:08:00,950 sticks. 103 00:08:02,910 --> 00:08:04,070 All right, all right. 104 00:08:04,810 --> 00:08:09,050 I'll send her some flowers, tell her I had a good time, but I'm seeing other 105 00:08:09,050 --> 00:08:10,050 people. 106 00:08:11,010 --> 00:08:11,909 No, Flex. 107 00:08:11,910 --> 00:08:15,230 What you have to do is you have to tell her that what you two did was wrong and 108 00:08:15,230 --> 00:08:17,630 that she should walk down the aisle with the man whose ring she's wearing. 109 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,720 Then you should say you're sorry and let her get on with her life. 110 00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:23,440 Since when did you become so sensitive about women's needs? 111 00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:27,960 Man, two days handcuffed to a sleazy motel bed tends to soften you up a bit. 112 00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:35,559 Flex, 113 00:08:42,380 --> 00:08:44,140 you are just in time. 114 00:08:44,580 --> 00:08:45,580 I... Tanya. 115 00:08:46,190 --> 00:08:50,710 We need to talk. I have something very important to say. Oh, my God. Oh, my 116 00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:51,830 You're proposing? 117 00:08:53,290 --> 00:08:55,690 Why would I propose to a woman who's already engaged? 118 00:08:55,930 --> 00:08:57,130 Because I'm not, baby. 119 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,030 I broke it off for us. 120 00:08:59,230 --> 00:09:00,230 I didn't tell you to do that. 121 00:09:01,530 --> 00:09:03,890 And would somebody please turn that song off? 122 00:09:06,090 --> 00:09:07,090 Listen, 123 00:09:07,310 --> 00:09:12,510 Tanya, our weekend together was great. More than great. It was life -altering. 124 00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:15,430 moment in time I will never forget. 125 00:09:19,470 --> 00:09:22,470 Tanya, we can't do this anymore. I'm not ready for the kind of commitment that 126 00:09:22,470 --> 00:09:23,470 you want. 127 00:09:23,810 --> 00:09:25,470 Remember, that's why you broke it off before. 128 00:09:25,830 --> 00:09:27,630 Yeah, but now we're in love. 129 00:09:28,450 --> 00:09:32,070 Aren't we, Flex? I mean, I will give up everything. I want to devote my entire 130 00:09:32,070 --> 00:09:33,070 life to you. 131 00:09:33,590 --> 00:09:39,570 Oh, Tanya, that's sweet, but your life is such a precious thing, you know, far 132 00:09:39,570 --> 00:09:41,530 too precious to devote to me. 133 00:09:41,730 --> 00:09:47,490 But... Listen, I know us parting will sting a little at first, but in time, 134 00:09:47,490 --> 00:09:48,590 we'll both go on. 135 00:09:50,350 --> 00:09:51,350 Take care of yourself. 136 00:10:00,690 --> 00:10:02,910 Not before I take care of you, Mr. 137 00:10:03,130 --> 00:10:04,730 Flex. Walk out on me, Washington. 138 00:10:22,410 --> 00:10:26,210 that you didn't like me. Oh, girl, stop thanking me. Take another bite of that 139 00:10:26,210 --> 00:10:27,210 taquito. You do it. 140 00:10:28,430 --> 00:10:31,750 And two dip and get naked. 141 00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:39,010 We didn't know any of these. That's compliments to your number one fan. 142 00:10:42,290 --> 00:10:44,490 So, do you have a lot of fans buying you drinks? 143 00:10:44,950 --> 00:10:46,890 Yeah, girl, all the time. 144 00:10:51,560 --> 00:10:52,560 Dr. Tittlehorn? 145 00:10:53,340 --> 00:10:56,500 Sorry, wrong number. Would you please stop calling and ask you for Tanya? 146 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:02,600 Tanya? 147 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:08,720 Tanya? 148 00:11:18,140 --> 00:11:20,260 Hey, hey, hey, hey, man, could you stop that? 149 00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:21,630 We didn't order... that's all. 150 00:11:21,870 --> 00:11:24,030 No, senor. Your wife did. 151 00:11:27,870 --> 00:11:29,130 What's going on here, Flex? 152 00:11:29,410 --> 00:11:34,770 I think I'm being stalked. No, you are being left high and not dry. 153 00:11:39,010 --> 00:11:41,370 So you wanted to dance with little Bow Wow. 154 00:11:41,970 --> 00:11:45,170 Okay, so what are you going to do? Tape his poster to your back and walk him 155 00:11:45,170 --> 00:11:46,170 sideways? 156 00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:53,460 Don't you get it? I was the girl of his dreams. 157 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:57,120 The dreamy does not turn around and ask the dreamer if he wants to go to the 158 00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,120 dance. So, dreamy, what are you going to do? 159 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:02,860 Simple. I'm going to ask the next guy who walks through that door. 160 00:12:04,980 --> 00:12:06,640 Oh, girl, it's Motormouth Lewis, though. 161 00:12:08,140 --> 00:12:09,140 Step aside. 162 00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:12,280 Uh, Lewis, would you like to go to the dance with me? 163 00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:15,000 Obviously, you're not keeping up with the ladies. 164 00:12:15,240 --> 00:12:18,420 I'm going with Evergreen Gibson. She's hot for me because she thought me and 165 00:12:18,420 --> 00:12:20,500 were making out in your father's bedroom at your party. 166 00:12:20,890 --> 00:12:21,890 Thank you. 167 00:12:24,330 --> 00:12:27,750 So not only is she sabotaging my dates and finding their phone numbers, she's 168 00:12:27,750 --> 00:12:28,750 following me everywhere. 169 00:12:29,230 --> 00:12:30,230 My God. 170 00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,290 There she is now. 171 00:12:32,810 --> 00:12:33,810 What up now? 172 00:12:38,430 --> 00:12:42,430 Man, what is it about me that makes me so irresistible to women, dog? 173 00:12:43,050 --> 00:12:47,390 Man, the thing is, she doesn't know the evil flex. The flex that's self 174 00:12:47,390 --> 00:12:49,610 -absorbed, self -centered, and self -fit. 175 00:12:50,010 --> 00:12:51,010 Especially when it comes to money. 176 00:12:51,570 --> 00:12:52,730 Speaking of which, can I borrow a pie dollar? 177 00:12:53,210 --> 00:12:55,110 No, but you ought to order something, dog. 178 00:12:55,590 --> 00:12:59,250 I need to show her that loving me ain't easy, even if I am beautiful. 179 00:12:59,750 --> 00:13:01,490 La, la, la, la, la. Come on, man. 180 00:13:04,270 --> 00:13:07,330 My brother, it's time to fight crazy with crazy. 181 00:13:08,290 --> 00:13:09,290 Watch this, all right? 182 00:13:10,450 --> 00:13:13,890 Hey, Tanya, I thought it over. I made a mistake. 183 00:13:14,390 --> 00:13:15,390 You want to move in? 184 00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:49,080 You need to hook yourself some buffalo wings and some beer. You know, because 185 00:13:49,080 --> 00:13:52,220 game day ain't game day unless you burp and taste the hot sauce. 186 00:13:53,660 --> 00:13:57,780 Game day, burp. I got it. I got it. And you're going to like this. 187 00:13:58,420 --> 00:14:03,100 For being my baby, you get to stay in my room all by yourself until the game's 188 00:14:03,100 --> 00:14:04,280 over. Yes, you do. 189 00:14:20,650 --> 00:14:21,650 Hey, Tanya. Hey. 190 00:14:21,970 --> 00:14:24,250 Flex tells me he's laundry day, so hit that, will you? 191 00:14:25,470 --> 00:14:28,110 And use a little fabric softener on the box of shorts. 192 00:14:28,330 --> 00:14:29,330 Got a little rash. 193 00:14:32,450 --> 00:14:33,670 Might want to hit this, too. 194 00:14:39,710 --> 00:14:40,710 Okay, 195 00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:44,250 um, do I have to do his laundry? 196 00:14:44,790 --> 00:14:48,570 Dwayne has family, and what is rule number 47? 197 00:14:49,660 --> 00:14:51,500 Family takes care of family. 198 00:14:51,740 --> 00:14:52,740 Yes, they do. 199 00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:54,800 Dr. Smackdown! Man, 200 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:00,740 I think it's working. 201 00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:06,060 That was genius. Hey, man, anything for my dog. 202 00:15:07,060 --> 00:15:08,060 Tanya! 203 00:16:02,260 --> 00:16:03,640 Don't hate 204 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:19,020 me 205 00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:20,680 because Arnaz doesn't. 206 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:32,920 I quit her. 207 00:17:07,630 --> 00:17:09,270 are we going to have some us time? 208 00:17:13,410 --> 00:17:18,530 Every third Sunday of the month. See? Rule 48. 209 00:17:18,910 --> 00:17:19,910 You know what, Flex? 210 00:17:20,050 --> 00:17:22,050 I am getting sick of all your rules. 211 00:17:22,250 --> 00:17:25,750 I never knew you were this impossible to live with, and I never thought I'd say 212 00:17:25,750 --> 00:17:28,710 this, but I don't think that we're meant to be together. 213 00:17:28,970 --> 00:17:29,970 I'm going home. 214 00:17:30,310 --> 00:17:31,310 Excuse me. 215 00:17:31,330 --> 00:17:34,890 What? No, baby, please don't go. I need you. 216 00:17:41,070 --> 00:17:42,450 you to detail my car 217 00:18:12,810 --> 00:18:15,210 this relationship, and I'm not going to give up that easily. 218 00:18:15,410 --> 00:18:21,410 Butter, fresh turn, rule number 49. See, I added my own rule. I am so on board. 219 00:18:23,550 --> 00:18:26,190 Woman, what does it take to drive you out of our lives? 220 00:18:26,590 --> 00:18:27,750 What are you saying, Flex? 221 00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:31,310 Ooh, Daddy, you might want to slow your roll because those muffins smell real 222 00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:32,310 good. 223 00:18:32,790 --> 00:18:34,410 All right, Daddy, I'm gone. Bye. 224 00:18:35,550 --> 00:18:37,990 Listen, I can't do this anymore, okay? 225 00:18:38,190 --> 00:18:39,930 The game is over. You have to leave. 226 00:18:40,150 --> 00:18:42,210 Me letting you move in here was part of a bigger plan. 227 00:18:42,590 --> 00:18:43,590 To make you hate it here. 228 00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:45,050 Oh, I don't believe you. 229 00:18:45,250 --> 00:18:47,150 Yes, oh, yes. I'm a bad man. 230 00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:52,670 I mean, don't you hate me? Don't you want to throw a brick through my window, 231 00:18:52,810 --> 00:18:56,710 hobble me, torch my cocky -duty little car like a normal woman? No. 232 00:18:57,070 --> 00:18:59,430 No, that's crazy. I love you. 233 00:18:59,810 --> 00:19:01,430 Oh, stop saying that, Tom. 234 00:19:02,170 --> 00:19:03,750 You love me too much. 235 00:19:03,970 --> 00:19:05,670 I hate you, Flex Washington. 236 00:19:06,090 --> 00:19:07,290 Okay, now do you love me? 237 00:19:09,830 --> 00:19:11,130 Not the way you want me to. 238 00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:13,400 I'm sorry. 239 00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:20,260 Do you really mean that? 240 00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:28,280 Well, I guess there's nothing left to say. 241 00:19:29,060 --> 00:19:30,060 Goodbye, Flex. 242 00:19:30,780 --> 00:19:32,100 Tanya, I didn't mean to hurt you. 243 00:19:32,580 --> 00:19:33,580 Whatever. 244 00:19:45,930 --> 00:19:47,250 I hope she's going to be all right. 245 00:19:48,350 --> 00:19:50,430 And thank you for this food, which I'm about to receive. 246 00:19:55,770 --> 00:19:56,770 Hmm. 247 00:19:57,290 --> 00:19:58,850 Crazy women sure can cook. 248 00:20:02,970 --> 00:20:05,310 Is that my car? 249 00:20:06,890 --> 00:20:12,050 Tanya, you're going to be all right. 250 00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:17,960 And that's not my car! 251 00:20:22,340 --> 00:20:24,420 Okay, girls, here's the phone. Call our names. 252 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,300 house tomorrow at 3 o 'clock. Get back here! 253 00:21:19,590 --> 00:21:20,590 Love you too, Netta. 18398