Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:09,730 --> 00:00:12,932
[phone ringing]
2
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,000
Wow.
3
00:00:19,273 --> 00:00:21,839
I believe they're here.
4
00:00:21,908 --> 00:00:24,409
Welcome to the Golden
Chamber Spa. I'm Carol.
5
00:00:24,478 --> 00:00:26,511
You must be
Roseanne and Jackie.
6
00:00:26,580 --> 00:00:28,246
Yeah, you got
anything to drink?
7
00:00:28,315 --> 00:00:31,216
Yeah, the air conditioner
in our cab was busted.
8
00:00:31,285 --> 00:00:32,484
Man, it was so sticky,
9
00:00:32,553 --> 00:00:35,787
I about pulled the whole
back seat out with me.
10
00:00:35,856 --> 00:00:37,822
Uh-huh.
11
00:00:37,891 --> 00:00:39,757
Why don't we check you in?
12
00:00:39,826 --> 00:00:41,092
Rinse off,
13
00:00:41,161 --> 00:00:43,394
and I'll meet you down
here for your evaluation.
14
00:00:43,463 --> 00:00:44,562
Yama, the bags.
15
00:00:47,067 --> 00:00:49,800
Can you put us close
to the soda machine?
16
00:00:49,869 --> 00:00:53,938
Yeah. I'm sweating
like a pig, man.
17
00:01:00,580 --> 00:01:02,714
I know that this
is a bit awkward,
18
00:01:02,783 --> 00:01:05,182
but I do have to identify
the problem areas.
19
00:01:07,620 --> 00:01:10,354
Oh, Roseanne, what
is this back here?
20
00:01:10,423 --> 00:01:13,057
Oh, well, that's
a dowager's hump.
21
00:01:13,126 --> 00:01:16,393
A lot of Eastern European
women have them.
22
00:01:16,462 --> 00:01:18,095
I don't have one.
23
00:01:18,164 --> 00:01:20,764
That's because
I smashed yours
when you were little.
24
00:01:23,302 --> 00:01:26,103
You really are quite
hairy, aren't you?
25
00:01:26,172 --> 00:01:30,374
Well, I think it's just,
it's kind of thick and dark,
26
00:01:30,442 --> 00:01:32,176
so it looks like
there's a lot.
27
00:01:32,245 --> 00:01:34,044
You should have a bikini
wax immediately.
28
00:01:34,114 --> 00:01:36,713
I shave my thighs
regularly.
29
00:01:37,783 --> 00:01:39,416
I can see the stubble.
30
00:01:43,655 --> 00:01:46,823
Jackie,
your hair is thin,
31
00:01:46,892 --> 00:01:48,825
follicles are clogged,
32
00:01:48,894 --> 00:01:51,328
root texture is rough.
33
00:01:51,398 --> 00:01:53,997
I'm very sorry.
34
00:01:54,066 --> 00:01:57,234
And, Roseanne,
I see lots of gray
35
00:01:57,303 --> 00:01:58,768
and split ends,
36
00:01:58,837 --> 00:02:03,506
and what is going on
with your eyebrows?
37
00:02:03,576 --> 00:02:07,177
Oh, I tried to light
the pilot light last week.
38
00:02:09,982 --> 00:02:13,016
Your skin is dirty, mmm.
39
00:02:13,085 --> 00:02:14,852
Um...
40
00:02:14,921 --> 00:02:17,586
some scarring.
I would recommend a facial.
41
00:02:17,655 --> 00:02:18,822
Every day.
42
00:02:18,891 --> 00:02:23,426
It's unusual,
but so is your skin.
43
00:02:23,495 --> 00:02:29,232
Jackie, okay, yeah, a lot
of dead skin on this face.
44
00:02:29,301 --> 00:02:31,768
Um, and those eye bags.
45
00:02:31,836 --> 00:02:33,869
Uh, wow! Okay.
46
00:02:36,341 --> 00:02:40,643
Okay, neck skin
is not good.
47
00:02:40,711 --> 00:02:43,213
It has very little
elasticity.
48
00:02:43,282 --> 00:02:45,615
Yours
is looser than most.
49
00:02:45,684 --> 00:02:48,718
I'm not really sure
what to recommend here.
50
00:02:48,786 --> 00:02:51,587
Well, maybe we should just
pack our bags and go home.
51
00:02:51,656 --> 00:02:54,724
We do have a product,
from France.
52
00:02:54,793 --> 00:02:56,192
It is a thigh cream,
53
00:02:56,260 --> 00:02:58,261
but I think that your
neck would respond.
54
00:03:05,704 --> 00:03:09,639
Jackie, your breasts
are oddly shaped
55
00:03:09,708 --> 00:03:12,676
and too small
for your body.
56
00:03:12,744 --> 00:03:16,579
I am so sorry.
57
00:03:16,648 --> 00:03:20,449
And, Roseanne,
ah, mmm,
58
00:03:20,517 --> 00:03:22,752
your derriere
is badly in need
59
00:03:22,821 --> 00:03:27,290
of a re-shaping
and a lift.
60
00:03:27,358 --> 00:03:29,659
I guess we're probably
the most disgusting people
61
00:03:29,726 --> 00:03:31,826
you've ever tried
to help, right?
62
00:03:31,896 --> 00:03:34,096
We don't judge.
63
00:03:34,165 --> 00:03:36,132
We reveal and heal.
64
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:37,967
That's what we do here.
65
00:03:38,036 --> 00:03:40,702
So, Jackie, why don't you
hop up on the bike?
66
00:03:40,771 --> 00:03:42,237
And we'll test
your endurance.
Okay.
67
00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:46,275
And, Roseanne, we will
measure your body fat.
68
00:03:46,343 --> 00:03:48,177
Great.
69
00:03:48,245 --> 00:03:50,345
Here.
70
00:03:50,414 --> 00:03:53,715
Oh, wow, okay, you're
bigger than you look.
71
00:03:53,784 --> 00:03:54,782
Okay.
72
00:04:01,959 --> 00:04:05,193
You are
unpleasantly fat.
73
00:04:05,262 --> 00:04:06,227
Thank you.
74
00:04:06,296 --> 00:04:07,496
Okay.
75
00:04:07,565 --> 00:04:09,465
Help. Roseanne?
76
00:04:19,342 --> 00:04:23,945
♪ If what doesn't kill us is makin' us stronger ♪
77
00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:26,114
♪ We're gonna last longer ♪
78
00:04:26,182 --> 00:04:28,950
♪ Then the greatest wall in China ♪
79
00:04:29,019 --> 00:04:32,120
♪ Or that rabbit with a drum ♪
80
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:36,290
♪ If there's one thing that I've learned ♪
81
00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:38,459
♪ While waiting for my turn ♪
82
00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:41,462
♪ It's that in each life some rain falls ♪
83
00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:44,632
♪ But you also get some sun ♪
84
00:04:44,700 --> 00:04:48,636
♪ And we'll make out better than okay ♪
85
00:04:48,704 --> 00:04:51,472
♪ Hear what I say ♪
86
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:56,144
♪ Yeah, any day ♪
87
00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:02,750
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
88
00:05:21,538 --> 00:05:23,738
[speaking Japanese]
89
00:05:30,846 --> 00:05:32,112
[speaking Japanese]
90
00:06:13,556 --> 00:06:17,424
The seaweed wrap
must be airtight.
91
00:06:17,493 --> 00:06:23,028
Gaps, spaces, and openings
will not be tolerated.
92
00:06:23,097 --> 00:06:26,600
So this cleans out
all the toxins, huh?
93
00:06:26,668 --> 00:06:30,003
It is not
a mere cleaning.
94
00:06:30,071 --> 00:06:32,938
The impurities are purged
95
00:06:33,007 --> 00:06:37,443
by a relentless drive
through the skin.
96
00:06:37,512 --> 00:06:40,212
I'm scared, Roseanne.
97
00:06:40,281 --> 00:06:42,214
Tighter.
98
00:06:42,283 --> 00:06:44,584
Oh.
Yike.
99
00:06:44,653 --> 00:06:46,786
That's pretty tight.
100
00:06:46,854 --> 00:06:50,523
At least I can still
move my fingers.
101
00:06:50,592 --> 00:06:53,092
You are weak. Pull!
102
00:06:53,161 --> 00:06:54,927
[both exhaling]
103
00:06:54,996 --> 00:06:57,931
Okay, now I can't breathe.
104
00:06:57,999 --> 00:06:59,398
Perfect.
105
00:06:59,467 --> 00:07:01,833
Now, you will
feel itching.
106
00:07:01,902 --> 00:07:04,203
It means that the toxins
107
00:07:04,272 --> 00:07:08,640
are fleeing
from the purification.
108
00:07:08,709 --> 00:07:11,577
After that, report
to the showers.
109
00:07:18,420 --> 00:07:22,120
Oh, I really wish she
hadn't said that thing
about the itching.
110
00:07:31,131 --> 00:07:32,897
Well...
111
00:07:32,966 --> 00:07:37,769
I haven't seen a worse case
since maybe Janet Reno.
112
00:07:37,837 --> 00:07:40,471
That's hitting
below the belt.
113
00:07:40,540 --> 00:07:44,209
And Ms. Reno
refused the products
that I recommended,
114
00:07:44,278 --> 00:07:47,545
just like Tommy Lee Jones
and James Woods.
115
00:07:47,614 --> 00:07:49,347
Well, we'll buy
your products.
116
00:07:49,416 --> 00:07:52,551
Oh, yeah, we'll get
all your products.
117
00:07:52,619 --> 00:07:53,918
Oh, good.
118
00:07:57,790 --> 00:07:59,724
Your pores are engorged!
119
00:07:59,793 --> 00:08:01,893
Ew, with what?
120
00:08:01,962 --> 00:08:05,363
Debris.
121
00:08:05,432 --> 00:08:07,865
That's why your face looks
so rough and peasant-like.
122
00:08:10,070 --> 00:08:11,636
You eat
a lot of cheese.
123
00:08:11,704 --> 00:08:12,870
No dairy!
124
00:08:12,939 --> 00:08:15,973
Ssh! Ssh!
125
00:08:16,042 --> 00:08:18,075
No dairy!
126
00:08:18,145 --> 00:08:20,110
Do you know the pores
define the face?
127
00:08:20,180 --> 00:08:22,847
They're little fountains
that squirt garbage
out of the body,
128
00:08:22,915 --> 00:08:24,949
and sometimes that
fountain gets clogged,
129
00:08:25,017 --> 00:08:27,117
and that's what
enlarges your pores.
130
00:08:27,186 --> 00:08:30,555
Large pores make a face
look tired and cheap.
131
00:08:30,623 --> 00:08:31,556
What is that?
132
00:08:31,624 --> 00:08:32,923
It's an extractor.
133
00:08:32,992 --> 00:08:35,526
It gets rid
of blackheads,
pimples, et cetera.
134
00:08:35,595 --> 00:08:37,294
Ow!
135
00:08:37,363 --> 00:08:38,295
One.
136
00:08:38,364 --> 00:08:40,798
Ow!
137
00:08:40,867 --> 00:08:45,269
We're just going to have
to peel off this top face.
138
00:08:45,338 --> 00:08:47,404
I recommend an acid peel.
139
00:08:47,473 --> 00:08:49,239
Michael Jackson
just swears by them.
140
00:08:49,309 --> 00:08:51,442
Oh, he's got
beautiful skin.
141
00:08:53,379 --> 00:08:55,279
Ohh!
142
00:08:55,348 --> 00:08:56,848
Ow!
143
00:08:56,916 --> 00:08:59,083
Calm!
144
00:09:04,423 --> 00:09:05,857
[peeling]
145
00:09:05,925 --> 00:09:08,359
[Roseanne]
Ow!
146
00:09:16,835 --> 00:09:20,604
It's like
little people food.
147
00:09:20,672 --> 00:09:23,340
I can't believe it,
I'm almost finished.
148
00:09:23,409 --> 00:09:24,641
Excuse me.
149
00:09:24,710 --> 00:09:26,676
Please tell me that
this is not the dinner.
150
00:09:26,745 --> 00:09:28,812
Please tell me that,
even if you have to lie.
151
00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:30,847
I'm afraid it is.
Carol has you both
152
00:09:30,916 --> 00:09:32,616
on a very strict
800-calorie diet.
153
00:09:32,684 --> 00:09:34,217
Well, you know what?
154
00:09:34,286 --> 00:09:36,786
I would like to know what
Carol is eating tonight.
155
00:09:36,855 --> 00:09:37,787
Tell me.
156
00:09:37,856 --> 00:09:39,022
Tell me!
157
00:09:39,090 --> 00:09:42,224
Ma'am, please,
there's still dessert.
158
00:09:42,293 --> 00:09:43,861
Oh, okay, good.
159
00:09:43,930 --> 00:09:46,797
Let me take these.
160
00:09:48,700 --> 00:09:49,932
Voilá.
161
00:09:54,574 --> 00:09:58,341
I'm really not getting
this joke, junior.
162
00:10:00,913 --> 00:10:03,714
This is our last meal
for 12 hours.
163
00:10:03,782 --> 00:10:04,914
Like hell it is.
164
00:10:04,983 --> 00:10:06,784
I can get us a pizza
here in 30 minutes.
165
00:10:06,852 --> 00:10:09,585
No, don't you start that.
166
00:10:09,654 --> 00:10:12,889
I'm going to get
two pepperoni pizzas
167
00:10:12,957 --> 00:10:15,357
with extra topping
of two pepperoni pizzas.
168
00:10:15,426 --> 00:10:17,126
Roseanne.
169
00:10:17,195 --> 00:10:19,562
You'll never get that past
the guard at the gate.
170
00:10:19,630 --> 00:10:20,630
Oh, yeah, I will,
171
00:10:20,698 --> 00:10:22,098
because you'll
distract the guy,
172
00:10:22,167 --> 00:10:26,035
and I'll smack him
with my hump.
173
00:10:26,104 --> 00:10:28,438
Roseanne.
174
00:10:28,507 --> 00:10:30,239
Listen,
if you are not with me,
175
00:10:30,308 --> 00:10:31,507
then you're against me.
176
00:10:31,576 --> 00:10:32,809
You can do it.
177
00:10:32,877 --> 00:10:35,011
People can go a month
without food.
178
00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:38,247
Yeah, because
they're idiots.
179
00:10:38,316 --> 00:10:39,415
I need food!
180
00:10:42,987 --> 00:10:45,988
I'm not going
to make it, Jackie.
181
00:11:03,373 --> 00:11:06,008
Don't, stop
hanging on me.
182
00:11:10,181 --> 00:11:13,982
Ah, why don't you
just go on without me?
183
00:11:14,051 --> 00:11:17,352
Just leave me the gun
so I can shoot the buzzards.
184
00:11:17,421 --> 00:11:18,821
Come on, come on.
185
00:11:18,890 --> 00:11:21,022
We're gonna get in trouble
with the hike leader.
186
00:11:21,092 --> 00:11:23,926
Oh, my God, Jackie.
What?
187
00:11:23,995 --> 00:11:26,295
There's a big, fat, juicy
squirrel over there.
188
00:11:26,363 --> 00:11:27,395
Get a rock!
189
00:11:27,464 --> 00:11:30,532
You are deranged
from lack of protein.
190
00:11:30,601 --> 00:11:33,135
Bean him!
191
00:11:33,203 --> 00:11:35,670
Hi.
192
00:11:35,739 --> 00:11:36,771
Hi.
193
00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:38,873
Would you like to have
dinner with me tonight?
194
00:11:38,942 --> 00:11:40,441
No, but can I
eat your dinner?
195
00:11:42,813 --> 00:11:45,581
Let me know when you're
the last man on Earth.
196
00:11:47,317 --> 00:11:49,618
Come on, let's shuffle
back to our room
197
00:11:49,687 --> 00:11:50,852
and nap before lunch.
198
00:11:50,921 --> 00:11:53,354
Maybe we'll get lucky
and drop dead in our sleep.
199
00:11:53,423 --> 00:11:54,956
Now, see? Here,
we're in trouble,
200
00:11:55,025 --> 00:11:56,558
here comes
the hike leader.
201
00:11:56,626 --> 00:11:58,125
Excuse me, ladies.
202
00:11:58,194 --> 00:11:59,861
No habla ingles.
203
00:11:59,930 --> 00:12:02,263
Look, if you want
to quit the hike,
204
00:12:02,332 --> 00:12:04,465
I just need to know.
It's really no problem.
205
00:12:04,535 --> 00:12:06,901
Okay, well, yeah, we're
gonna quit the hike.
206
00:12:06,969 --> 00:12:09,336
Yeah, I'm kind of amazed
you made it this far.
207
00:12:12,241 --> 00:12:13,742
What's that
supposed to mean?
208
00:12:13,810 --> 00:12:16,076
Well, a woman of your size
209
00:12:16,145 --> 00:12:18,746
really shouldn't put so
much strain on her heart.
210
00:12:20,516 --> 00:12:23,317
Are you saying that I
can't finish that hike?
211
00:12:23,386 --> 00:12:26,921
I'm just saying that not
everyone was meant to be fit.
212
00:12:26,990 --> 00:12:28,422
Well, I'm fit!
213
00:12:28,491 --> 00:12:30,157
Yeah, right,
214
00:12:30,226 --> 00:12:33,060
and I'm the World Boxing
Council lightweight champion.
215
00:12:35,098 --> 00:12:39,100
Well, I'll snap
your spine in half like
a potato chip, you bitch.
216
00:12:46,109 --> 00:12:47,040
Jackie.
217
00:12:47,109 --> 00:12:48,041
What?
218
00:12:48,110 --> 00:12:49,042
There's another squirrel,
219
00:12:49,111 --> 00:12:52,346
and I am not letting
this one get away.
220
00:12:52,415 --> 00:12:54,114
Oh, my God.
221
00:12:56,919 --> 00:13:00,387
And reach forward
through the fingertips
of your left hand.
222
00:13:00,456 --> 00:13:02,422
Now drop the right shoulder
underneath your thigh,
223
00:13:02,492 --> 00:13:04,357
reach your right hand
between your legs.
224
00:13:04,427 --> 00:13:06,927
Wrap your left arm around your
body with your right hand,
225
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:08,628
grab on to your left wrist.
226
00:13:08,697 --> 00:13:11,297
Inhale, lift the chest
away from the tailbone.
227
00:13:11,366 --> 00:13:12,833
Let's press the arms
straight.
228
00:13:12,901 --> 00:13:15,234
Open up your chest
towards the sky.
229
00:13:16,572 --> 00:13:20,073
This is not human.
230
00:13:20,142 --> 00:13:23,744
I thought yoga
was about reefer
and Ravi Shankar.
231
00:13:23,813 --> 00:13:26,579
And now back
on your buttocks.
232
00:13:26,648 --> 00:13:28,315
Press the left heel
forward
233
00:13:28,383 --> 00:13:30,851
and with both hands, lift
the foot over your head.
234
00:13:37,192 --> 00:13:40,560
Hi, Pete, I hate
to disturb you,
235
00:13:40,628 --> 00:13:43,796
but I have a couple
of openings
236
00:13:43,865 --> 00:13:46,298
for past-life
regression therapy,
237
00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:49,070
if anyone's interested.
238
00:13:49,137 --> 00:13:54,341
I think at this point I would
volunteer for lab testing.
239
00:13:54,409 --> 00:13:55,842
Pick me up.
240
00:14:03,485 --> 00:14:06,853
Now, it's not unusual
for a person
241
00:14:06,921 --> 00:14:10,255
to question the reality
of past lives,
242
00:14:10,324 --> 00:14:14,293
so let's begin by shaking off
our uncertainty and doubts.
243
00:14:14,362 --> 00:14:17,464
Just shake off
that cosmic debris.
244
00:14:23,304 --> 00:14:24,237
Very nice.
245
00:14:24,305 --> 00:14:25,436
Thank you.
246
00:14:27,909 --> 00:14:33,846
Yama is going to be
infusing me with his breath
247
00:14:33,915 --> 00:14:37,850
so that I can
better assist you.
248
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:40,119
We're going to...
249
00:14:40,187 --> 00:14:42,889
go inside--
250
00:14:48,328 --> 00:14:51,030
We're going to go inside
251
00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:53,465
so that we can find out
252
00:14:53,534 --> 00:14:56,334
why you come back
into this lifetime
253
00:14:56,403 --> 00:14:58,603
with these obstacles.
254
00:14:58,672 --> 00:15:01,273
You, with the eye bags,
255
00:15:01,342 --> 00:15:04,076
and you,
so unpleasantly fat.
256
00:15:06,980 --> 00:15:11,082
So let's begin by
breathing in the air
257
00:15:11,151 --> 00:15:13,051
through our eyeballs,
258
00:15:13,119 --> 00:15:15,687
and bringing it down
259
00:15:15,756 --> 00:15:18,057
into our diaphragms.
260
00:15:18,124 --> 00:15:23,629
Just follow Yama
and I and inhale.
261
00:15:27,835 --> 00:15:30,002
Exhale, I didn't
hear a fah.
262
00:15:30,070 --> 00:15:32,704
Inhale.
263
00:15:32,773 --> 00:15:34,404
[all]
Faaaaaah!
264
00:15:34,473 --> 00:15:38,944
Very nice. Now just continue
that gentle breathing,
265
00:15:39,013 --> 00:15:42,313
in silence,
and close your eyes--
266
00:15:42,381 --> 00:15:43,849
Faaaah!
Faaaah!
267
00:15:43,918 --> 00:15:46,551
...and know that
what we call life
268
00:15:46,619 --> 00:15:51,822
we have experienced
many times in the past.
269
00:15:51,892 --> 00:15:55,759
Imagine yourselves
in nature.
270
00:15:55,828 --> 00:15:58,396
There's a bridge up ahead.
271
00:15:58,464 --> 00:16:02,667
On the other side
lies a lifetime
272
00:16:02,735 --> 00:16:07,272
you have not visited
in many years.
273
00:16:07,340 --> 00:16:09,840
Go ahead.
274
00:16:09,909 --> 00:16:12,109
Cross the bridge.
275
00:16:19,018 --> 00:16:19,950
There she is.
276
00:16:20,019 --> 00:16:22,219
Xena, the
warrior princess.
277
00:16:22,287 --> 00:16:23,220
Get her.
278
00:16:34,167 --> 00:16:35,532
Ha ha.
279
00:16:35,601 --> 00:16:40,203
I guess your mother never
told you not to hit girls.
280
00:16:40,272 --> 00:16:42,106
Xantippi!
281
00:16:42,175 --> 00:16:44,808
I should have known
these men were with you.
282
00:16:44,877 --> 00:16:46,844
Forget them, Xena.
283
00:16:46,913 --> 00:16:49,345
I have come to give you
a real challenge.
284
00:16:49,414 --> 00:16:51,048
Fine.
285
00:16:51,116 --> 00:16:52,482
But no weapons.
286
00:17:18,443 --> 00:17:20,378
You have won, Xena.
287
00:17:20,445 --> 00:17:23,347
Slay me now
and end my suffering!
288
00:17:23,415 --> 00:17:28,985
Oh, I have something
even more terrible
in mind for you.
289
00:17:29,054 --> 00:17:31,955
Haison! Kim!
290
00:17:34,726 --> 00:17:36,460
Scrub her.
291
00:17:38,730 --> 00:17:39,896
Aah! Aah!
292
00:17:43,569 --> 00:17:47,236
Slowly bring your awareness
back into the room.
293
00:17:47,305 --> 00:17:49,873
Ahhh!
294
00:17:49,942 --> 00:17:52,308
Oh, man,
that was so awesome.
295
00:17:52,377 --> 00:17:56,578
I was kicking ass,
and my neck looked great!
296
00:17:56,646 --> 00:17:59,415
Jackie, who were you?
297
00:17:59,484 --> 00:18:02,485
I was a leper.
298
00:18:06,024 --> 00:18:08,424
Parts kept
falling off of me.
299
00:18:20,171 --> 00:18:23,139
Ladies,
congratulations.
300
00:18:23,208 --> 00:18:24,540
Give yourselves
a big hand
301
00:18:24,608 --> 00:18:25,974
for all the hard work
302
00:18:26,043 --> 00:18:29,111
that you've
accomplished thus far.
303
00:18:29,179 --> 00:18:32,414
Now that you've achieved
these beautiful bodies,
304
00:18:32,483 --> 00:18:35,150
it's a shame
to cover them up.
305
00:18:35,218 --> 00:18:36,851
But it is the law,
306
00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:38,953
so it is with
great pleasure
307
00:18:39,022 --> 00:18:40,989
that I introduce to you
308
00:18:41,058 --> 00:18:44,993
world-renowned fashion
designer Todd Oldham.
309
00:18:47,798 --> 00:18:48,863
Thank you, Carol.
310
00:18:51,335 --> 00:18:52,634
I believe every
good designer
311
00:18:52,702 --> 00:18:55,302
filters his ideas through
the era that we live in,
312
00:18:55,371 --> 00:18:57,206
and we're living in an
era of self-expression,
313
00:18:57,274 --> 00:18:59,107
where colors,
patterns, and textures
314
00:18:59,176 --> 00:19:00,742
all mingle perfectly
together.
315
00:19:00,811 --> 00:19:03,344
Were what's fashionable
is what makes you feel good.
316
00:19:03,412 --> 00:19:05,814
So today I want to show
you a few pieces
317
00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:07,082
from my Fall 1996 collection.
318
00:19:07,151 --> 00:19:09,683
Ah, so do you make anything
over a size 3?
319
00:19:09,752 --> 00:19:10,985
Yes, we do.
320
00:19:11,054 --> 00:19:12,587
Oh, great, good.
321
00:19:12,655 --> 00:19:16,724
Uh, Todd, maybe you could
give Roseanne some help.
322
00:19:16,792 --> 00:19:17,725
Okay.
323
00:19:23,300 --> 00:19:24,232
It's a pleasure.
324
00:19:24,301 --> 00:19:25,466
Nice to meet you.
325
00:19:25,535 --> 00:19:28,502
Well, I think to cantilever
the top section,
326
00:19:28,571 --> 00:19:31,439
a really strong foundation
garment is in order,
327
00:19:31,507 --> 00:19:33,907
and the mid-section,
328
00:19:33,976 --> 00:19:36,411
let's keep it dark
and go with long cuts
329
00:19:36,479 --> 00:19:39,079
to sort of de-emphasize
this area
330
00:19:39,148 --> 00:19:41,949
and bring your
attention...elsewhere.
331
00:19:42,017 --> 00:19:44,652
And then, to avoid that
cloven hoof problem,
332
00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,423
I think a closed-toe
shoe would be in order.
333
00:19:47,491 --> 00:19:49,524
So don't wear anything
reflective.
334
00:19:49,592 --> 00:19:51,058
Keep it simple,
nothing shiny.
335
00:19:51,127 --> 00:19:53,561
No furs.
It'll add too much bulk.
336
00:19:53,630 --> 00:19:56,664
No belts, just go
with what you want to do,
337
00:19:56,733 --> 00:19:58,633
what you feel good about.
338
00:19:58,701 --> 00:20:01,201
You have such pretty skin,
such a pretty face.
339
00:20:01,270 --> 00:20:02,737
Aw, thank you.
340
00:20:02,806 --> 00:20:04,604
Oh, sure.
341
00:20:04,674 --> 00:20:06,440
Oh, my goodness.
342
00:20:10,914 --> 00:20:13,180
Now, girls,
is there anything special
343
00:20:13,249 --> 00:20:15,816
that you'd like
in your make-up today?
344
00:20:15,885 --> 00:20:17,450
No. You're the artist.
345
00:20:17,519 --> 00:20:19,287
Yeah, just go
with your instinct.
346
00:20:19,356 --> 00:20:20,453
Good.
347
00:20:20,522 --> 00:20:21,854
Because from my experience,
348
00:20:21,925 --> 00:20:23,991
I have found out
that natural is best.
349
00:20:24,060 --> 00:20:26,426
Let your face tell
its own story.
350
00:20:26,494 --> 00:20:27,560
Would that be okay?
351
00:20:27,629 --> 00:20:28,594
All right.
All right.
352
00:20:41,377 --> 00:20:42,310
Wow!
353
00:20:58,626 --> 00:21:01,461
Oh, my God.
354
00:21:01,531 --> 00:21:02,695
[clink]
355
00:21:25,086 --> 00:21:26,920
We're going to go inside
356
00:21:26,989 --> 00:21:29,688
so that we can find out
357
00:21:29,757 --> 00:21:31,891
why you've come back
into this lifetime
358
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:34,093
with these obstacles.
359
00:21:34,162 --> 00:21:37,696
You with the eye bags,
360
00:21:37,765 --> 00:21:40,433
and you
so unpleasantly fat.
361
00:21:44,172 --> 00:21:48,007
So let's begin
by breathing in the air
362
00:21:48,075 --> 00:21:50,543
through our eyeballs,
363
00:21:50,612 --> 00:21:55,281
and bringing it down
into our diaphragms.
364
00:21:55,350 --> 00:21:57,917
Just follow Yama and I
365
00:21:57,985 --> 00:22:00,386
and inhale.
366
00:22:02,724 --> 00:22:04,791
Faaaaaah!
367
00:22:04,859 --> 00:22:07,793
Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA
28901
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.