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Mr. Woodman, ever say about my uncle I
thought he was a steam radiator?
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00:00:07,470 --> 00:00:08,530
Well, nobody's perfect.
3
00:00:09,790 --> 00:00:11,950
Oh, my aunt took him to see a
psychiatrist anyway.
4
00:00:12,890 --> 00:00:15,470
Now, what did she want the psychiatrist
to do, convince him he wasn't a
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00:00:15,470 --> 00:00:16,470
radiator?
6
00:00:17,270 --> 00:00:18,910
No, just get him to stop hissing.
7
00:00:20,950 --> 00:00:24,210
After hearing that joke, I know how your
uncle felt.
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00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:39,000
Welcome back.
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00:00:40,060 --> 00:00:43,160
Your dreams were your ticket out.
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00:00:44,160 --> 00:00:50,080
Welcome back to that same old place that
you laughed about.
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00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:54,520
Well, the names have all changed since
you hung around.
12
00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:59,080
But those dreams have remained and
they've turned around.
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00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:04,959
Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Who'd
have thought they'd lead ya? Back here
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00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:07,120
where we need ya. Back here.
15
00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:12,420
We tease him a lot because we got him on
the spot.
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00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:13,800
Welcome back.
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00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:18,060
Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome
back.
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00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:39,940
seats and clam up.
19
00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:45,080
Uh, Mr. Horshack, who put you in charge?
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00:01:45,340 --> 00:01:48,700
It just so happens that during Mr.
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00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:53,540
Carter's absenteeism, I have juniority.
22
00:01:55,780 --> 00:01:58,560
Yeah, well, where is Carter anyway? He's
gonna miss my big surprise.
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00:01:58,820 --> 00:02:02,280
I don't know. You know what? Maybe he
took his kid to the baby doctor.
24
00:02:03,220 --> 00:02:04,220
That's stupid.
25
00:02:04,420 --> 00:02:05,560
Babies can't be doctors.
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00:02:09,039 --> 00:02:10,500
would they put in the prescription,
Google?
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00:02:23,340 --> 00:02:24,340
Good morning.
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00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:27,920
Good afternoon.
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00:02:29,340 --> 00:02:30,620
Look, I'm sorry I'm late.
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00:02:31,580 --> 00:02:33,520
You're sorry you're late?
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You're sorry? for depriving these eager
young minds of their much -needed
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education.
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00:02:40,870 --> 00:02:42,290
You are sorry?
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00:02:44,910 --> 00:02:48,590
Well, Shaq, you want to be a teacher,
you've got to wear a tie, you've got to
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00:02:48,590 --> 00:02:51,990
keep thumbs in your pocket at all times,
and you've got to practice being
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00:02:51,990 --> 00:02:52,990
ignored.
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00:02:53,330 --> 00:02:54,330
Take a seat.
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00:02:57,070 --> 00:02:58,070
Did you hear me?
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00:02:58,770 --> 00:03:00,210
No, I'm ignoring you.
40
00:03:08,430 --> 00:03:10,150
is because I went to see apartments
again.
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00:03:10,370 --> 00:03:12,170
Apartment hunting all week, can't find
anything.
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00:03:12,730 --> 00:03:14,470
Well, say no more.
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00:03:15,010 --> 00:03:16,530
Juan Epstein is here.
44
00:03:17,390 --> 00:03:19,330
You say you're looking for an apartment.
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00:03:19,590 --> 00:03:23,950
You say you can't find one. You say you
looked in Brooklyn, Queens, and parts of
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00:03:23,950 --> 00:03:24,769
Staten Island.
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00:03:24,770 --> 00:03:26,790
Let me tell you what I'm gonna do.
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00:03:27,730 --> 00:03:29,210
What are you gonna do, sell me a
Vegematic?
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00:03:31,370 --> 00:03:32,690
Close, but no cigar.
50
00:03:34,150 --> 00:03:37,230
I have here in my hand the answer to all
your problems.
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00:03:37,780 --> 00:03:43,260
It's a lease to a two -bedroom apartment
at 1962 Linden Boulevard.
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00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:47,780
What's the matter, Epstein? Your mother
stopped writing notes and started
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00:03:47,780 --> 00:03:48,780
writing leases?
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00:03:50,540 --> 00:03:51,740
No, my uncle did.
55
00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:55,620
Wait a second. This is a real lease.
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00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:57,320
Of course it's a real lease.
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00:03:57,740 --> 00:04:00,800
Hey, I got connections. My uncle, he
runs a chain of slums.
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00:04:07,150 --> 00:04:08,150
very nice neighborhood.
59
00:04:08,610 --> 00:04:12,410
Yeah, well, you know, the way Uncle Mo
figured it out, he had the branch off.
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00:04:12,850 --> 00:04:16,990
Why just steal from the pool when you
can rip off everybody?
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00:04:19,190 --> 00:04:21,930
Epstein, I don't know if this is a put
-on or not, but at this point, I'll grab
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00:04:21,930 --> 00:04:22,930
at anything.
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00:04:23,250 --> 00:04:25,230
What are you grabbing at now, Carter?
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00:04:26,830 --> 00:04:29,630
Epstein may or may not have found me an
apartment.
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00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:31,690
Well, it's my Uncle Mo's building.
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00:04:32,670 --> 00:04:34,330
Why would you want to move to Puerto
Rico?
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00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:41,620
the wrong side of the family.
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00:04:42,060 --> 00:04:44,000
Uncle Mo, he runs a slick operation.
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00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:45,620
He's teaching me the ropes.
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Ropes?
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00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:49,380
What's the matter? The building has no
elevators?
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00:04:51,740 --> 00:04:55,820
Look, kid around if you will, Mr.
Woodman, but this looks legitimate.
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00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:57,300
When can I see it, Juan?
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00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:58,600
Anytime you want.
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00:04:58,980 --> 00:05:01,160
You better make it fast before it gets
condemned.
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00:05:04,180 --> 00:05:07,780
There is only one thing that can make a
man that crabby.
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00:05:08,910 --> 00:05:10,710
He buys his underwear too small.
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00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:16,390
Hey, you guys would be weird, too, if
you were raised by lizards.
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00:05:20,010 --> 00:05:21,010
Was she really?
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00:05:24,550 --> 00:05:26,030
Joke, Barbarino. Joke.
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00:05:28,930 --> 00:05:31,450
Julie, this is all going so smoothly,
it's making me nervous.
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00:05:31,690 --> 00:05:34,350
Honey, relax. We saw the new apartment.
It's wonderful.
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00:05:36,410 --> 00:05:37,950
Okay, truck's loaded up.
84
00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:39,660
The only thing left to go is the babies.
85
00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:41,760
Arnold, could you get us a cotton?
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00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:47,260
Wait a minute, wait a minute. Now, don't
be stupid. You don't pack babies in
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00:05:47,260 --> 00:05:48,260
cotton, Epstein.
88
00:05:50,500 --> 00:05:51,800
Strap them to the roof of the truck.
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00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:56,340
Yeah, otherwise they might get chipped.
90
00:05:58,500 --> 00:06:03,680
Uh, okay, Santini brothers. Listen, you
handle the hardware. We'll take care of
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00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:04,680
the livestock.
92
00:06:06,990 --> 00:06:11,330
Mr. Carter, I think your refrigerator's
sick. It looks all hot and sweaty.
93
00:06:13,090 --> 00:06:15,490
Yeah, well, that's what generally
happens when you pull a plug out.
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00:06:15,990 --> 00:06:17,930
What are you going to do with this root
beer? Are you going to leave it here to
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00:06:17,930 --> 00:06:18,930
die?
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00:06:20,970 --> 00:06:25,730
Well, old pal, I know that over the
years, you know, I took more than I
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00:06:27,410 --> 00:06:28,870
But you tempted me, you know that?
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00:06:29,090 --> 00:06:33,870
You tempted me with your liverwurst and
your Danish and your anchovies.
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00:06:34,770 --> 00:06:35,770
So stay.
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00:06:36,300 --> 00:06:38,760
Stay full and keep a cool upper chest.
101
00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,760
That was very touching, Vinnie.
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00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:45,000
Very touching.
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00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:48,020
Now, we would like a moment alone with
the stove.
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00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:53,740
Yeah, I mean, you guys aren't the only
ones that have to confront the beloved
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00:06:53,740 --> 00:06:54,740
appliance.
106
00:06:56,300 --> 00:07:01,520
You know, Mr. Carter, I'm kind of glad
you're moving because we're all getting
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00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:03,480
too old to be climbing in and out of
windows.
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00:07:05,690 --> 00:07:06,690
See you in a while.
109
00:07:06,710 --> 00:07:08,790
Bye. Hey, guys. Hey, y 'all. Come here.
110
00:07:09,090 --> 00:07:10,090
Hey, guys.
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00:07:10,490 --> 00:07:11,490
Hey, y 'all.
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00:07:12,930 --> 00:07:17,590
One more time for old time's sake.
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00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:40,320
Take a good look around.
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00:07:41,720 --> 00:07:43,240
Goodbye to our first apartment.
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00:07:44,220 --> 00:07:45,220
Yeah.
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00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:46,959
Hey, Julie?
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00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:49,440
What? What do you say we leave the way
we first came in?
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00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:51,420
You mean in debt and unemployed?
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00:08:42,059 --> 00:08:43,059
I love the way it's decorated.
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00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:44,500
Early sweat hog.
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00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:48,100
It would be great to have enough room
for all four of us, honey.
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00:08:48,500 --> 00:08:51,300
I think we should have kept our old
apartment, though. You know, use it as a
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00:08:51,300 --> 00:08:52,300
summer home.
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00:08:52,940 --> 00:08:54,760
Come on, let's show the girls to their
nursery.
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00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:59,280
Hey, Richie baby, you want to see your
new digs? Come on, you want to help us
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00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:00,280
unpack?
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00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:02,299
Come on.
128
00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:03,019
Let's go.
129
00:09:03,020 --> 00:09:05,580
I think Robin wants the crib by the
phone.
130
00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:07,660
Oh, yeah, well, I'm sick of Robin's
demands.
131
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,940
It's already stronger than I am.
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00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:28,100
All right, then. Let's let biceps be
biceps.
133
00:09:29,660 --> 00:09:33,760
I'd like to congratulate everybody on
the job well done. All furniture
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00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:34,860
and economy force, sir.
135
00:09:35,560 --> 00:09:39,520
Anyway, except for that runaway bookcase
that hit that bump on Ocean Parkway.
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00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:46,200
I think that we moved the furniture and
we worked very hard. I think it's Miller
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00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,200
time.
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00:09:53,070 --> 00:09:54,890
we got the time, who's got the beer?
139
00:09:56,210 --> 00:09:57,710
Did you settle for root beer?
140
00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,230
Requesting permission to sit, sir.
141
00:10:03,050 --> 00:10:04,910
All right, everybody, just ease up.
142
00:10:10,930 --> 00:10:11,930
Listen,
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00:10:15,430 --> 00:10:17,310
you guys worked hard all day.
144
00:10:17,590 --> 00:10:18,790
I guess it's Miller time.
145
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:31,080
Hey, Mr. Carter, I gotta hurry up
downstairs and get the driver. He wants
146
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,380
paid. What's his hurry?
147
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:34,660
Well, he's parked in a no -furniture
zone.
148
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,280
Money, money, money. Everybody wants
money.
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00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:40,460
Hey, guys, I gotta congratulate you.
150
00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:42,280
You didn't break a thing.
151
00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:44,020
What I mean, like, what did you expect?
152
00:10:44,300 --> 00:10:46,000
We left all the broken stuff on the
truck.
153
00:10:48,420 --> 00:10:49,840
Vinnie, there's someone here I want you
to meet.
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00:10:50,100 --> 00:10:51,100
Oh, yeah? Who?
155
00:10:51,340 --> 00:10:52,340
Over here.
156
00:10:52,620 --> 00:10:53,620
Her name is Shirley.
157
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:55,480
Oh, hello, Shirley.
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00:10:56,980 --> 00:10:58,140
Boy, are you alone?
159
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:04,280
Yes? Well, that's good, because you've
got a nice face.
160
00:11:07,540 --> 00:11:08,960
But you're empty inside.
161
00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:12,180
Well, I'm going to give her a chance to
get turned on.
162
00:11:17,420 --> 00:11:19,720
Well, Rachel loves the new nursery.
163
00:11:20,020 --> 00:11:21,020
Oh, that's terrific.
164
00:11:21,100 --> 00:11:25,180
But Robin's complaining about the
wallpaper. She says it clashes with her
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00:11:25,180 --> 00:11:26,180
diapers.
166
00:11:27,589 --> 00:11:28,910
It didn't when we put them on.
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00:11:31,530 --> 00:11:32,550
I got the driver.
168
00:11:32,890 --> 00:11:33,890
This way, Matt.
169
00:11:39,410 --> 00:11:40,950
All right, Carter, how do you want to
pay me?
170
00:11:41,210 --> 00:11:42,390
About a mile or about an hour?
171
00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:44,430
Well, which is cheaper?
172
00:11:45,550 --> 00:11:47,430
Well, for anybody else, it'll be 40
bucks.
173
00:11:47,670 --> 00:11:48,770
For you, it's on the house.
174
00:11:50,650 --> 00:11:52,250
Thank you, Mr. Wilbur. That's nice of
you.
175
00:11:52,590 --> 00:11:53,590
Listen.
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00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:59,400
It's a hard trip. Got stopped by a cop
and sold an end table and a lamp.
177
00:12:01,580 --> 00:12:03,720
I need those for my living room.
178
00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:05,520
That's what the cop said.
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00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:12,600
If you really use that 40 bucks, the
price of polygrip goes up every day.
180
00:12:15,260 --> 00:12:18,100
Now, you low -lifes want to ride back
with me?
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00:12:18,460 --> 00:12:19,540
Yeah, yeah, let's go.
182
00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:21,220
Hasta luego, baby.
183
00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:23,060
Vaya con Dios.
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00:12:23,820 --> 00:12:24,820
Chili con carne.
185
00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:32,920
I'll get it.
186
00:12:34,180 --> 00:12:35,180
Phones you get.
187
00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:36,840
Babies you take care of.
188
00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:38,320
I'll be right back.
189
00:12:42,340 --> 00:12:47,880
Well, I don't want to be one to squeeze
my own accordion, but did I do good or
190
00:12:47,880 --> 00:12:48,880
did I do good?
191
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,280
Well, Juan, given those choices...
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00:12:51,710 --> 00:12:55,170
You did good. Yeah, we got a real sweet
deal here, Mr. Carter.
193
00:12:55,690 --> 00:12:59,250
I just hope you remember it the next
time you grade my tests, you know what I
194
00:12:59,250 --> 00:13:00,250
mean?
195
00:13:00,350 --> 00:13:03,970
You see, a D can become a B very easily.
196
00:13:04,650 --> 00:13:07,270
All you gotta do is just put a line
right down the middle of it.
197
00:13:08,170 --> 00:13:10,690
What do you need me for? You've been
doing that yourself for two years.
198
00:13:12,030 --> 00:13:14,630
Yeah, but if you get caught doing it, I
don't get in any trouble.
199
00:13:17,650 --> 00:13:20,250
I'll get it. Maybe it's your
refrigerator. Looking for Vinnie.
200
00:13:24,620 --> 00:13:25,620
Come in.
201
00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:27,940
I'm Mo Epstein, your landlord.
202
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:31,880
Well, well, well. What do you know,
Uncle Mo? Epstein, the young guy. How
203
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:35,080
doing? All right. Mr. Epstein, nice to
meet you. Listen, I can't tell you how
204
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:38,900
much I appreciate this apartment. Don't
mention it. The one here told me all
205
00:13:38,900 --> 00:13:39,900
about you.
206
00:13:40,660 --> 00:13:42,920
You're the famous Mr. Cotter.
207
00:13:44,820 --> 00:13:47,500
A man who molds young minds.
208
00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:52,440
Once in a while, of course, a mind is
moldy before it gets to you.
209
00:13:54,280 --> 00:13:58,040
That's such is the life of a teacher.
So, I hear you have a beautiful wife.
210
00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:00,300
Yeah, well, I'm a lucky man.
211
00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:01,960
Oh.
212
00:14:03,700 --> 00:14:04,700
Hi.
213
00:14:05,500 --> 00:14:06,500
What is that?
214
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,620
That's my beautiful wife.
215
00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,640
No, no, no, I mean the thing at the end
of her arm there.
216
00:14:12,780 --> 00:14:13,900
That's her beautiful hand.
217
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:16,700
I mean the thing in the blanket.
218
00:14:17,180 --> 00:14:18,360
This is Robin.
219
00:14:18,820 --> 00:14:20,660
Juan, they have a baby.
220
00:14:21,700 --> 00:14:22,700
Oh?
221
00:14:33,580 --> 00:14:35,580
Yeah, what's the matter? Tell him. Tell
him what's the matter.
222
00:14:36,160 --> 00:14:37,160
Uncle Moe.
223
00:14:37,300 --> 00:14:39,500
Uncle Moe, these people here, they were
desperate.
224
00:14:39,700 --> 00:14:42,220
Well, you know what my rules are. No
babies allowed.
225
00:14:45,020 --> 00:14:46,020
They make noise.
226
00:14:46,860 --> 00:14:48,060
They get sick.
227
00:14:48,460 --> 00:14:49,700
They spit up.
228
00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:54,000
Uncle Moe, these people here, they need
an apartment. Yeah, well, they're going
229
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,880
to need a lawyer now. And you, you're
going to need a new future. You're too
230
00:14:56,880 --> 00:14:58,760
soft -hearted to be in the apartment
business.
231
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:00,920
Nice to meet you.
232
00:15:04,560 --> 00:15:06,280
I was just trying to help, folks.
233
00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:11,540
Come on. Juan, you want to help? You
better stop Woodman in the truck.
234
00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:13,580
We might have to live in it for a while.
235
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:25,320
Here's one.
236
00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:28,600
Large indoor -outdoor suite.
237
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:31,280
Fenced in yard.
238
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:33,140
Wooded area.
239
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:37,900
And it's only $100 a month, Mr. Connors.
Let me see that.
240
00:15:38,620 --> 00:15:39,620
$100 a month.
241
00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:44,560
Arnold, this is an ad for a kennel.
242
00:15:48,620 --> 00:15:50,160
Maybe they'll make an exception.
243
00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:52,499
Oh, wow.
244
00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:54,620
Lookie, lookie, lookie, lookie, lookie,
lookie. Check it out. Check it out. Look
245
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:55,620
at this. Look at this.
246
00:15:55,760 --> 00:16:00,040
Four rooms, over bowling alley, under
pool hall, next to a disco.
247
00:16:04,270 --> 00:16:07,170
That's nice for you, but we were hoping
for something a little noisier, like an
248
00:16:07,170 --> 00:16:09,310
apartment on an airport runway or
something.
249
00:16:10,650 --> 00:16:11,990
Wait a minute. What's this?
250
00:16:13,090 --> 00:16:14,090
Unfirm apt.
251
00:16:15,550 --> 00:16:19,990
A fish kitchen shop.
252
00:16:21,750 --> 00:16:24,130
You know, the guy who wrote this, he
spells worse than me.
253
00:16:29,290 --> 00:16:32,090
Vinnie, these are abbreviations. It
means, uh...
254
00:16:32,330 --> 00:16:36,430
Unfresh, unfresh apartment, living room.
It's an efficiency kitchen, stall,
255
00:16:36,530 --> 00:16:37,530
shower.
256
00:16:37,730 --> 00:16:38,750
$2 .50 a month.
257
00:16:39,330 --> 00:16:40,330
Not bad.
258
00:16:40,570 --> 00:16:41,670
It's also my old apartment.
259
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:47,770
Mr. Carter, I do not understand why you
were giving up so easily.
260
00:16:48,170 --> 00:16:50,570
Hey, you know, Mr. Carter, Arnold's
right.
261
00:16:50,930 --> 00:16:54,370
I mean, Epstein's uncle, he don't got a
leg to stand on.
262
00:16:55,970 --> 00:16:58,070
Look, you know, Juan's in enough trouble
as is.
263
00:16:58,290 --> 00:17:00,350
I mean, he feels so bad he didn't even
come to school today.
264
00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:04,060
I'll just stay with my brother for a
couple of weeks until I can find
265
00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:05,380
Oh, got it.
266
00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:07,940
What's this I hear about you moving out
of your new apartment?
267
00:17:08,740 --> 00:17:10,099
Yeah, unfortunately, it's true.
268
00:17:10,940 --> 00:17:14,040
Didn't take your neighbors long to get
up a petition, did it?
269
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:16,599
Get it, Carter? Petition?
270
00:17:20,180 --> 00:17:22,140
I'm too much, you know that? I'm too
much.
271
00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:28,880
Take your medicine, Mr. Woodman.
272
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:33,240
was raised by lizards.
273
00:17:36,380 --> 00:17:40,340
Well, we'll forget about leaving so
fast. I didn't have time to get you to
274
00:17:40,340 --> 00:17:41,340
place.
275
00:17:41,820 --> 00:17:45,560
I'm really sorry, Mrs. Carter. I didn't
mean to mess it up, you know? Oh, it's
276
00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:48,840
okay, Juan. We can find another
apartment. I don't know if you're going
277
00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:49,719
another uncle.
278
00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:50,499
Oh, yeah.
279
00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:52,900
Uncle Mo's really bummed out. I mean, he
gave me the can.
280
00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:56,920
Look, I just had these cards ordered for
myself. Look at this here.
281
00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:58,880
Juan Epstein, consultant.
282
00:17:59,380 --> 00:18:01,080
Real estate rentals and sales.
283
00:18:01,740 --> 00:18:03,160
Ears pierced while you wait.
284
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:06,020
Special rate for groups.
285
00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:09,939
Hi, Joyce.
286
00:18:09,940 --> 00:18:10,940
Hi, honey.
287
00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:12,860
Hi, Juan. Hi, honey.
288
00:18:15,340 --> 00:18:17,220
I got a message for you from Mr.
Woodman.
289
00:18:17,440 --> 00:18:19,080
Show up in school tomorrow or else.
290
00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:21,680
I got a lot of thinking to do, Mr.
Carter.
291
00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:23,420
And I really can't do that in school.
292
00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:30,940
Listen, Juan, I know you got problems,
but that's no reason to cut class.
293
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:34,160
Not cutting class.
294
00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:37,200
I was tutoring him in moving and
storage.
295
00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:39,500
An accomplice.
296
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,960
Juan, I think we should find your family
tree and chop it down.
297
00:18:47,180 --> 00:18:49,000
Oh, look who it is. Uncle Schmo.
298
00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:54,820
If you're trying to make me feel bad,
don't bother. Better men than you have
299
00:18:54,820 --> 00:18:55,820
tried and failed.
300
00:18:56,060 --> 00:18:58,300
Gabe, why don't you invite Mr. Epstein
in?
301
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:00,640
The babies have already had their shots.
302
00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:03,820
Very funny, but this is not a social
call.
303
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:07,700
Oh, it's too bad. We're about to offer
you some flat beer and stale pizza.
304
00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:10,780
I came up to offer you this.
305
00:19:11,340 --> 00:19:15,740
Don't bother reading it. I will
summarize all 40 pages in five words.
306
00:19:15,740 --> 00:19:16,740
30 days.
307
00:19:17,420 --> 00:19:19,660
That's not soon enough. We'll be out
tomorrow morning.
308
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:21,560
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
309
00:19:22,720 --> 00:19:23,980
You mean they're not going to fight me?
310
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:25,800
What?
311
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,200
You want us to fight you? Sure, sure, of
course.
312
00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:31,120
I sue you, you sue me.
313
00:19:31,700 --> 00:19:32,900
Court battles, lawyers.
314
00:19:33,420 --> 00:19:36,220
Look, some people golf, some people
bowl.
315
00:19:36,420 --> 00:19:38,640
I fight with my tenants. That's my fun.
316
00:19:39,780 --> 00:19:42,820
I mean, what would life be without a
little litigation, you know?
317
00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:48,020
You are not only a mean man, you are a
thick man.
318
00:19:48,980 --> 00:19:51,300
And you people are crazy, don't you
understand?
319
00:19:51,540 --> 00:19:55,080
If you hang in for long enough, you'll
win. I don't have a leg to stand on.
320
00:19:55,120 --> 00:19:56,120
It'll be fun.
321
00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:59,080
Now, look, Uncle Moe, Uncle Moe, they
ain't going to fight you because you're
322
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:02,500
uncle, and they don't want to get me in
any more trouble than what I am. Forget
323
00:20:02,500 --> 00:20:07,460
that I'm his uncle. Forget that. Think
of me as a mad dog, as a bee, huh?
324
00:20:09,020 --> 00:20:10,220
Look, look, cut it.
325
00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:11,760
Picture this, huh?
326
00:20:12,020 --> 00:20:17,580
A courtroom. On one side, a hated
slumlord. A man who started with a
327
00:20:17,580 --> 00:20:19,840
tenement and built it into a thriving
ghetto.
328
00:20:21,900 --> 00:20:25,020
I see, I see, I see. The one with the
foam at the mouth. That's you, right?
329
00:20:25,820 --> 00:20:28,480
That's me. Okay, now on the other side,
right?
330
00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:33,360
A dedicated teacher, a beautiful wife,
sitting with their twins. Can you see
331
00:20:33,360 --> 00:20:35,660
them? Yeah, I can see it.
332
00:20:35,940 --> 00:20:37,580
Rachel's cooing for the jury.
333
00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:39,560
And Robin wants a mistrial.
334
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:42,420
And look, look at the jury.
335
00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:47,320
You've won their hearts. They hate me.
They're climbing out of the jury box to
336
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:48,660
tear out the rest of my hair.
337
00:20:48,940 --> 00:20:50,380
We don't have to go to court for that.
338
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:56,320
A contender? Huh? Now, what about you?
Come on. What about me?
339
00:20:56,540 --> 00:20:59,540
Right. You want to know about me? Right.
You want to fight? All right. All
340
00:20:59,540 --> 00:21:03,040
right. All right. You got one. Okay.
We're not moving out of this apartment,
341
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:06,700
we're not even going to court to prove
it. A staggering blow. Okay. We don't go
342
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:08,080
to court. Keep punching. Come on. You
want more?
343
00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:09,159
You want more?
344
00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:13,360
All right. I want one to get his job
back, and I want you to give him a
345
00:21:13,360 --> 00:21:16,600
salary. How about that? Oh, beautiful
Carter. You got me on the ropes. I'm
346
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:19,280
dazed. Okay. Give me the knockout punch.
347
00:21:19,540 --> 00:21:20,540
All right. Here it comes.
348
00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:21,580
You ready?
349
00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:25,820
You're going to let people with babies
in all your apartments.
350
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:31,740
You had me where you wanted me, but you
went too far.
351
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:35,400
You guys with principles, you never know
when to stop.
352
00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:36,720
All right.
353
00:21:37,620 --> 00:21:39,640
All right, stay if you want.
354
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:42,620
At least now, you're fighters.
355
00:21:43,580 --> 00:21:48,060
But one spit up on the floor, and I go
straight to the Supreme Court.
356
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,760
Does that mean I can show up at your
office in the morning?
357
00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:54,120
Yeah, yeah, come by. I'll teach you how
to evict the bedridden.
358
00:21:57,960 --> 00:21:59,240
Nice seeing you again.
359
00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:05,640
There it is, there it is, there it is.
I'm back in business.
360
00:22:06,300 --> 00:22:09,980
Honey, I have never seen you that mad.
361
00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:12,920
That was very exciting.
362
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:23,760
Don't you have something to do?
363
00:22:25,900 --> 00:22:29,000
Yeah. I got to go over the rules and
regulations of the building.
364
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:32,460
All right, now, first of all, here's the
situation.
365
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:35,420
Things have to be quiet around here
around 10 o 'clock.
366
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:39,640
Don't want anybody just blasting their
stereo, you know. We got a lot of old
367
00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:41,840
folks underneath you, and they're just
going to complain a lot.
368
00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:44,620
The rent is due on the 15th of the
month.
369
00:22:45,020 --> 00:22:47,360
Not the 16th, but it's due on the 15th
of the month.
370
00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:51,020
The garbage is picked up on Tuesdays.
You just...
371
00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:52,430
Just pick up the garbage.
372
00:22:52,770 --> 00:22:55,690
You pick up the garbage and you move it
to the door very easily.
373
00:22:56,310 --> 00:22:58,810
You open the door and you take the
garbage and you just go.
374
00:23:04,770 --> 00:23:05,090
Just
375
00:23:05,090 --> 00:23:13,830
think
376
00:23:13,830 --> 00:23:18,310
of it, Julie. This place is really ours.
Hey, you ever think about my Uncle
377
00:23:18,310 --> 00:23:19,310
Ellsworth?
378
00:23:20,470 --> 00:23:22,570
New apartment, but some things never
change.
379
00:23:23,910 --> 00:23:26,870
Listen to this. Uncle Ellsworth was a
real fancy guy. Liked to travel all the
380
00:23:26,870 --> 00:23:30,470
time. Lived in St. Louis, right? So one
time he's taking a train from St. Louis
381
00:23:30,470 --> 00:23:34,450
to Kansas City. Sits in a dining car,
and a cannibal sits down next to him.
382
00:23:35,590 --> 00:23:36,590
A cannibal.
383
00:23:36,830 --> 00:23:40,290
Yes, a cannibal. A cannibal. Cannibal.
And the waiter comes over.
384
00:23:41,210 --> 00:23:45,490
And he says to the cannibal. The
cannibal. Yes. Would you like to see a
385
00:23:45,550 --> 00:23:48,270
sir? Uh -huh. And the cannibal says, no.
386
00:23:48,750 --> 00:23:49,870
Just the passenger list.
387
00:24:05,050 --> 00:24:11,210
Welcome back Your dreams were your
ticket out
388
00:24:11,210 --> 00:24:16,150
Welcome back To that same old
389
00:24:40,040 --> 00:24:41,800
Welcome back.
390
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:44,780
Welcome back. Welcome back.
391
00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:46,280
Welcome back.
392
00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:50,400
Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome
back.
393
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:54,960
We always just thought of friends.
394
00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:57,040
Welcome back.
395
00:24:57,720 --> 00:25:01,780
And I smile when I think how we must
have been.
396
00:25:02,460 --> 00:25:06,360
And I know what a scene you were
learning in.
397
00:25:06,820 --> 00:25:10,220
Was there something that made me come
back?
31545
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