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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:20,810 --> 00:00:21,810 Oh, my. 2 00:00:23,450 --> 00:00:26,130 What a sea of bright and shiny faces. 3 00:00:28,030 --> 00:00:30,510 Oh, come on. Coming back to school isn't so bad. 4 00:00:31,390 --> 00:00:33,030 We can all use the sleep. 5 00:00:34,450 --> 00:00:35,450 Man, 6 00:00:35,950 --> 00:00:37,530 you know what I hate about the first day of school? 7 00:00:37,770 --> 00:00:40,590 What? It's too far away from the last day of school. 8 00:00:42,210 --> 00:00:43,810 I love the first day of school. 9 00:00:44,130 --> 00:00:46,650 It's the only day I don't gotta lie about what I did yesterday. 10 00:00:48,110 --> 00:00:49,370 Hey, where's Vinny? 11 00:00:49,870 --> 00:00:52,550 I don't know, Ronald. I really haven't seen him in about a week. 12 00:00:52,930 --> 00:00:54,830 Don't worry, man. Vinny, he's going to be here. 13 00:00:55,290 --> 00:00:57,490 Sometimes he just likes to straggle in a month or two late. 14 00:00:59,510 --> 00:01:02,150 You know, Ronald, the old school still looks the same, don't it? 15 00:01:02,410 --> 00:01:05,230 Yeah, just like they tore it down but forgot to haul it away. 16 00:01:07,210 --> 00:01:09,510 Gee, it even smells the same. Yeah, 17 00:01:10,690 --> 00:01:13,350 well, that's either Epstein's old locker or Mr. 18 00:01:13,590 --> 00:01:14,590 Cocktail's old joke. 19 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:29,100 Good morning, Mr. Cotter. Have a nice summer vacation? 20 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,600 Oh, hello, Mr. Washington. 21 00:01:32,940 --> 00:01:33,940 Hi there. 22 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:41,180 Listen, I'm ready for a great school year. Oh, that makes me feel so great, 23 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:44,060 Washington. Now, why don't you just have a seat right over there, right? Yes, 24 00:01:44,060 --> 00:01:46,660 sir. Yes, sir. Okay. Our lesson for today... Will you shut up? 25 00:02:00,110 --> 00:02:01,470 Welcome back. 26 00:02:02,510 --> 00:02:05,650 Your dreams were your ticket out. 27 00:02:06,650 --> 00:02:12,550 Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about. 28 00:02:13,390 --> 00:02:16,990 Well, the names have all changed since you hung around. 29 00:02:17,690 --> 00:02:21,550 But those dreams have remained and they've turned around. 30 00:02:22,610 --> 00:02:27,430 Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Back here 31 00:02:27,430 --> 00:02:29,590 where we need ya. Back here. 32 00:02:34,959 --> 00:02:36,440 Welcome back. 33 00:02:37,060 --> 00:02:40,720 Welcome back. Welcome back. 34 00:02:41,300 --> 00:02:47,580 Welcome back. Welcome back. Yeah, we tease him a lot because we got him on 35 00:02:47,580 --> 00:02:49,260 spot. Welcome back. 36 00:02:50,060 --> 00:02:51,100 Welcome back. 37 00:03:02,830 --> 00:03:04,930 Hey, Mr. Carter, are you glad to be back in school? 38 00:03:05,350 --> 00:03:08,450 Arnold, this is the second most painful day in a schoolteacher's life. 39 00:03:08,650 --> 00:03:09,650 What's the first? 40 00:03:10,170 --> 00:03:11,170 Payday. 41 00:03:13,690 --> 00:03:16,430 Come on, sit down, everybody. Let's go. Go, go. Move it, move it, move it. 42 00:03:16,850 --> 00:03:19,610 I have a very important announcement to make. 43 00:03:20,130 --> 00:03:21,750 You're in my chair, missy. 44 00:03:23,110 --> 00:03:24,470 Relax, Epstein. What's the difference? 45 00:03:24,770 --> 00:03:25,770 What's the difference? 46 00:03:26,070 --> 00:03:27,590 This is the chair where I flunked math. 47 00:03:30,050 --> 00:03:31,710 This is the chair where I flunked history. 48 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:35,240 This is the chair where I flunked biology. 49 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:38,940 So? So, it's my lucky chair. 50 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:45,180 Miss, if you're not terribly attached to this chair, would you mind sitting 51 00:03:45,180 --> 00:03:48,460 somewhere else? As you can see, this young man is slightly disturbed. 52 00:03:50,500 --> 00:03:54,220 Sit down, Epstein. Sit down. Sit down. You got your chair. You feel okay? 53 00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:55,940 Ah, that's much better. 54 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,280 Can I continue? Oh, please do. Please do. 55 00:03:59,580 --> 00:04:02,720 Now, as I said, I have an announcement to make. 56 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:04,820 announcement, you never finished the last one. 57 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:09,440 This is the last one. All right, everybody, Mr. Cocktail's gonna make his 58 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:10,440 announcement. 59 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:16,899 Thank you, Freddie Washington and the Buchanan Brass. 60 00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:19,200 Now, can I continue? 61 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:20,720 Certainly. 62 00:04:21,279 --> 00:04:24,240 I'd like to say that the worst things in life are listening to my announcements. 63 00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:28,240 And here come two of them now. 64 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:32,700 Marion Carvelli, what are you guys doing here? 65 00:04:33,130 --> 00:04:35,690 They cleaning out your cages over at your school? Yeah. 66 00:04:37,570 --> 00:04:40,530 How about that? A joke from the human Brillo pad. 67 00:04:41,910 --> 00:04:44,670 He said he got a joke from a human Brillo pad. 68 00:04:46,910 --> 00:04:50,170 All right, what are you guys doing here? Yeah, you see, we got transferred. It's 69 00:04:50,170 --> 00:04:51,270 all in there. Oh, Mr. 70 00:04:51,470 --> 00:04:54,610 Cotter, I'm sorry, I'm late. You see, I had to have my aunt throw some stuff out 71 00:04:54,610 --> 00:04:55,349 of the apartment. 72 00:04:55,350 --> 00:04:57,050 Two chairs and my uncle. 73 00:04:58,810 --> 00:05:02,310 He said he's talking about two chairs. I heard what he said, Murray. 74 00:05:03,270 --> 00:05:05,490 All right, Carveli, why don't you and your echo find a seat? 75 00:05:05,770 --> 00:05:06,770 Sure. 76 00:05:07,570 --> 00:05:09,590 So what are they doing here, Mr. Carter? 77 00:05:09,890 --> 00:05:12,550 Well, it looks like they moved into the Buchanan School District. 78 00:05:12,890 --> 00:05:14,250 So, why'd you move? 79 00:05:18,030 --> 00:05:21,890 Mijolantis? Oh, no! 80 00:05:23,350 --> 00:05:28,310 It just so happens, Arnold, that the city tore down the building where I 81 00:05:28,910 --> 00:05:30,770 Now, ain't that just like the city? 82 00:05:31,370 --> 00:05:34,860 It's hit on the perfect... good building, and they leave you standing. 83 00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:41,380 And you think I got to sit here and get insulted by you, Washington? 84 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:44,980 Yeah. You think you got to sit there and get insulted by you, Washington? 85 00:05:45,740 --> 00:05:46,800 All right, all right, look. 86 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:49,000 That's enough. 87 00:05:49,340 --> 00:05:52,080 That is enough. You understand, Carvelli? Yeah, you want to know what I 88 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:55,420 understand? Anytime any two of you guys, I'll take all three outside and 89 00:05:55,420 --> 00:06:00,400 personally switch your noses. Yeah, Carvelli said you'll put your nose on 90 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:02,180 and your nose... 91 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:09,360 I have 92 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:17,460 an 93 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:20,000 announcement to make. Is this announcement going to be good news? 94 00:06:21,460 --> 00:06:22,560 Yes and no. 95 00:06:22,780 --> 00:06:25,180 Oh, wow, man. Then you better give us the bad news first. 96 00:06:35,590 --> 00:06:36,670 Boy, that was fast. 97 00:06:39,370 --> 00:06:40,850 May I have your attention, please? 98 00:06:41,230 --> 00:06:42,230 No. 99 00:06:43,530 --> 00:06:44,530 Thank you. 100 00:06:45,410 --> 00:06:47,010 I would like to make an announcement. 101 00:06:48,970 --> 00:06:51,950 When I started teaching here, we had 73 teachers. 102 00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:56,270 By the second year, 23 of them left to go into other occupations. 103 00:07:08,780 --> 00:07:10,560 you have to get the age of the bus driver. 104 00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:17,080 This is not a riddle, Arnold. 105 00:07:17,980 --> 00:07:20,540 This is an announcement. You are a riddle. 106 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:29,520 The announcement is that I am the new principal of Buchanan High School. 107 00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:36,080 What happened to Principal Lazarus? He got an easier job. 108 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:38,040 Warden at a high -security prison. 109 00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:41,660 Principal Lazarus retired. 110 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:46,780 The school board, in its infinite wisdom, selected the most talented, the 111 00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:48,900 capable, and the most able man for the job. 112 00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:50,440 Oh, so where is he? 113 00:07:52,340 --> 00:07:55,420 I'm going around making this announcement to all the classes, Carter, 114 00:07:55,420 --> 00:07:56,560 thought I'd start at the bottom. 115 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:00,260 Oh, Mr. 116 00:08:00,860 --> 00:08:01,860 Woodman. 117 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:05,100 Let me be the first one to congratulate you. 118 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:09,040 And I'm happy to see that success is not going to your head. 119 00:08:09,340 --> 00:08:12,120 Thank you. In fact, I don't see it in any part of your body. 120 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:19,980 I would also like to 121 00:08:19,980 --> 00:08:21,180 announce... No, no, no. 122 00:08:21,420 --> 00:08:22,420 Don't do it. 123 00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:24,700 You want to tell them that you're the new vice principal? 124 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,960 You did it. You had to come in here and do it. You had to come in here and blow 125 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:30,859 my whole surprise. 126 00:08:30,860 --> 00:08:32,559 Wow, Mr. Tatum, is that true? 127 00:08:33,919 --> 00:08:34,919 You're the new VP. 128 00:08:35,039 --> 00:08:36,039 Yeah. 129 00:08:36,460 --> 00:08:39,120 announce what I was going to make, but I'm also going to be teaching this class 130 00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:40,120 and a few others. 131 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:44,560 Well, congratulations to you. You're the first one of us to make it. 132 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:50,420 Yeah, yeah, yeah. A Mazel Tov on your face. 133 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:53,660 This is great. Really, really great. 134 00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:58,460 What's so great about it? I'm happy, Mr. Woodman. You remember the way you were 135 00:08:58,460 --> 00:09:00,140 when you were named poster boy for Poison Oak? 136 00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:08,920 you punks are delighted because you think you have a friend in high places. 137 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:14,600 I never said that. I didn't say that. I said it. 138 00:09:14,860 --> 00:09:15,860 Said what? 139 00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:21,000 Now that your partner in crime is the vice principal, you think you can get 140 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,000 with anything you want? 141 00:09:22,780 --> 00:09:24,900 The possibilities are mind -boggling. 142 00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:47,700 This is going to look just like home just as soon as I put up a few more 143 00:09:47,700 --> 00:09:48,700 pictures. 144 00:09:48,820 --> 00:09:50,120 As if I don't run out of nails. 145 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:52,240 Or thumbs. 146 00:09:55,420 --> 00:09:56,420 Ha! 147 00:09:56,780 --> 00:09:59,260 Well, they gave you Woodman's old job and his old face. 148 00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:04,700 Julie, what am I going to do? 149 00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:06,460 I'm a teacher, not an administrator. 150 00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:09,960 I've been on this job for less than a day and I think I'm in over my head 151 00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:11,860 already. You want to talk about it, honey? 152 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:13,600 No. Okay. 153 00:10:17,230 --> 00:10:19,650 First of all, my secretary, Ms. Scherbeck, doesn't show up today. 154 00:10:20,150 --> 00:10:21,990 So I have no one to schedule my appointments. 155 00:10:22,310 --> 00:10:25,650 Consequently, the president of the PTA and the Roto -Rooter man show up at the 156 00:10:25,650 --> 00:10:26,650 same time. 157 00:10:28,170 --> 00:10:31,250 She would try to talk to a man about the morality of our youth in front of 158 00:10:31,250 --> 00:10:33,090 another man standing there with a dripping plunger. 159 00:10:35,210 --> 00:10:36,990 I'm glad you didn't want to talk about it. 160 00:10:37,450 --> 00:10:42,750 On top of all that, Woodman waltzes into my class. 161 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:46,440 blurts out that I'm vice -principal before I have a chance to tell anybody, 162 00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:49,520 then Epstein goes running around the school like Paul Revere yelling, 163 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:50,119 the VP! 164 00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:51,120 Cotter's the VP! 165 00:10:52,900 --> 00:10:53,940 It's not funny, Julie. 166 00:10:54,300 --> 00:10:55,300 Come on. 167 00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:57,440 Where's the old Cotter sense of humor? 168 00:10:58,140 --> 00:11:00,820 I'm going to need more than my old sense of humor to solve this problem. 169 00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:05,180 Well, Gabe, I can solve one of your problems right now. I'm here already. I 170 00:11:05,180 --> 00:11:08,780 might as well just stay for the rest of the day and sub for Ms. Sherbeck. I can 171 00:11:08,780 --> 00:11:11,240 just call the sitter and have her stay with the twins the rest of the day, 172 00:11:11,790 --> 00:11:13,570 Oh, thanks a lot, honey. That's going to really help. 173 00:11:14,670 --> 00:11:16,130 But what am I going to do about the sweat hogs? 174 00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:18,470 I could get the sitter to stay with them, too. 175 00:11:21,330 --> 00:11:22,330 I'm serious. 176 00:11:23,510 --> 00:11:25,870 Now that I'm vice principal, they think they're going to get away with murder. 177 00:11:26,130 --> 00:11:28,770 That is something you're going to have to deal with when the time comes. 178 00:11:29,430 --> 00:11:30,890 I feel like I'm two different people. 179 00:11:31,330 --> 00:11:34,450 I'm Mr. Cotter, their old friend, and I'm also Mr. Cotter, their new enemy. 180 00:11:36,410 --> 00:11:40,310 Excuse me, Mr. Cotter, your vice principalship. I am Mr. Cotter, the 181 00:11:40,310 --> 00:11:41,259 the sweat hogs. 182 00:11:41,260 --> 00:11:44,640 And I'm here in the vice principal's office because I want to tell you that 183 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:47,980 have to treat the sweat hogs a little differently because you must understand 184 00:11:47,980 --> 00:11:49,460 that they have special problems. 185 00:11:54,020 --> 00:11:56,260 Special problems, my big toe, Connor. 186 00:11:58,220 --> 00:12:01,640 In the vice principal business, everybody gets treated the same. 187 00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:05,420 treated as an equal. Now get out of my office and don't dare ask for a raise. 188 00:12:05,780 --> 00:12:08,800 I get the picture. I get it. 189 00:12:10,109 --> 00:12:11,109 Didn't you like my aunt? 190 00:12:11,530 --> 00:12:12,630 I loved him. 191 00:12:13,050 --> 00:12:14,150 I hated him. 192 00:12:20,550 --> 00:12:21,550 How's it going, Carter? 193 00:12:22,770 --> 00:12:24,430 Smooth. Under control. 194 00:12:24,730 --> 00:12:25,730 Just give it time, Carter. 195 00:12:25,810 --> 00:12:27,050 That's what General Custer said. 196 00:12:43,470 --> 00:12:44,690 What is going on here? 197 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:46,110 We got your presents. 198 00:12:47,550 --> 00:12:49,350 A matching set of dummies. 199 00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:54,110 It was the strangest thing, Mr. Carter. 200 00:12:54,430 --> 00:12:59,790 We were all just sitting around when suddenly Carvelli says, I think I'd like 201 00:12:59,790 --> 00:13:00,810 tie myself up. 202 00:13:02,630 --> 00:13:06,970 That's right, Mr. Carter. And then Murray said, I think I'd like to tie 203 00:13:06,970 --> 00:13:07,970 up, too. 204 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,920 and I want you guys to meet me in the vice principal's office in five minutes. 205 00:13:30,740 --> 00:13:37,520 So this is what the new vice principal's office 206 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:42,280 looks like. This is our very nice layout you got here. Very nice. Well, I, for 207 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:43,400 one, am very impressed. 208 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:51,440 Why, to get an office like this, I too might step on some of the little people. 209 00:13:54,420 --> 00:13:56,280 Why did you guys pull a cheap trick like that? 210 00:13:56,680 --> 00:13:59,080 Come on, Mr. Carter, it was only Carvelli and Murray. 211 00:13:59,900 --> 00:14:03,620 Come on, Mr. Carter, it's not like we tied up real people. 212 00:14:05,060 --> 00:14:06,060 Well, 213 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:07,840 you guys broke the rules of the school. 214 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:10,620 And you've got to suffer the consequences. 215 00:14:15,660 --> 00:14:16,800 These are detention clips. 216 00:14:17,140 --> 00:14:18,900 I'm giving you detention for one week. 217 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:34,020 I get it, I get it. Your 218 00:14:34,020 --> 00:14:36,560 joke is much funnier than our joke. 219 00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:39,960 Sure, sure. 220 00:14:40,060 --> 00:14:41,860 I get it, Mr. Carter. Here you go. 221 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:45,000 No joke, Epstein. 222 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:48,620 Scotch take this back together and report to the detention hall after your 223 00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:49,620 period. 224 00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:51,480 Are you for real? 225 00:14:52,880 --> 00:14:53,940 Hey, Mr. Carter, look. 226 00:14:54,820 --> 00:14:57,220 I get that all of a sudden you ain't one of us anymore. 227 00:14:57,820 --> 00:14:58,820 You're one of them. 228 00:14:59,260 --> 00:15:02,240 I never thought you'd turn into a them, Mr. Carter. 229 00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:06,100 Hey, wow, man. You're deserting us. 230 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:10,540 Guys, I'm not deserting you at all. I just have to do my job as vice 231 00:15:10,820 --> 00:15:12,920 Why, you're dropping out on us, Mr. Carter. 232 00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:17,610 Look. I'm not doing anything of the kind. I'm going to be here whenever you 233 00:15:17,610 --> 00:15:20,870 me. Well, what happens if we ain't going to be here when you need us? 234 00:15:21,370 --> 00:15:24,150 That's right. You want to drop out on us? Well, we can drop out on you, too. 235 00:15:24,190 --> 00:15:26,230 That's right. I'm going to tell you something. I was thinking of quitting 236 00:15:26,230 --> 00:15:29,770 anyhow. And as a matter of fact, I was thinking about dropping out three years 237 00:15:29,770 --> 00:15:30,770 ago. 238 00:15:33,470 --> 00:15:35,730 I guess I was, too. There it is. 239 00:15:36,410 --> 00:15:38,210 All this is happening because I gave you detention. 240 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:41,580 That ain't the reason, Mr. Katya. We ain't tripping over that, man. The thing 241 00:15:41,580 --> 00:15:44,940 that if we used to get in trouble or something like that before, you used to 242 00:15:44,940 --> 00:15:46,200 cover for us with Mr. Woodman. 243 00:15:46,780 --> 00:15:48,760 But now, you are Mr. Woodman. 244 00:15:50,660 --> 00:15:52,160 So you're going to drop out of school, huh? 245 00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:54,620 What are you going to do? Where are you going to go? 246 00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:56,840 Don't worry about it. We can all find jobs. 247 00:15:57,100 --> 00:15:58,100 What kind of jobs? 248 00:15:58,420 --> 00:16:00,380 We can get good jobs for big bucks. 249 00:16:01,180 --> 00:16:02,019 That's right. 250 00:16:02,020 --> 00:16:03,260 That's right. You tell him, Freddy. 251 00:16:05,780 --> 00:16:10,230 Well, um... Okay, well... Personally, I don't got no job right now. But I 252 00:16:10,230 --> 00:16:14,130 guarantee you this much, man. I'm going to be rich and famous in three years. 253 00:16:14,590 --> 00:16:17,690 What a coincidence. Just the same amount of time it took you to pass geometry. 254 00:16:20,530 --> 00:16:21,530 Look, 255 00:16:23,030 --> 00:16:26,190 guys, if you want to do anything with your life, you've got to get a high 256 00:16:26,190 --> 00:16:30,430 diploma. And the only place you can get that is right here. Oh, great. We'll be 257 00:16:30,430 --> 00:16:31,650 by this afternoon to pick it up. 258 00:16:32,710 --> 00:16:34,230 It's not that simple, Epstein. 259 00:16:34,690 --> 00:16:35,690 You've got to earn it. 260 00:16:36,270 --> 00:16:37,330 I knew there was a catch. 261 00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:41,510 Look, you know, I can make some big speech, but I'm going to just tell you 262 00:16:41,510 --> 00:16:42,510 truth, the way it is. 263 00:16:42,730 --> 00:16:44,810 You've got to stay in school, and that's all there is to it. 264 00:16:45,010 --> 00:16:47,070 Well, we all quit in school, and that's all there is to that. 265 00:16:47,350 --> 00:16:48,810 That's right. That's all there is to that. 266 00:16:50,190 --> 00:16:51,790 I guess that's all there is to that. 267 00:16:53,350 --> 00:16:57,750 Look, guys, I'm the vice principal now. If you guys do something wrong, I've got 268 00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:58,750 to reprimand you. 269 00:16:59,050 --> 00:17:01,050 But also, as vice principal, I can help you. 270 00:17:01,410 --> 00:17:04,010 Like, if you need some work experience, I can help you get that experience. 271 00:17:04,329 --> 00:17:06,810 Oh, wow, Mr. Cathy. Now, you're going to tell me... You're telling us that you 272 00:17:06,810 --> 00:17:08,190 can go out and get us jobs, man? 273 00:17:08,410 --> 00:17:11,550 No, no, I can't get you jobs on the outside, Freddy. That's not what I said. 274 00:17:11,550 --> 00:17:13,450 there are jobs right here in school that have to be done. 275 00:17:13,790 --> 00:17:15,589 Yeah, sure, sure. Like what? 276 00:17:16,210 --> 00:17:18,130 Like what? This doesn't... You work in the cafeteria. 277 00:17:18,630 --> 00:17:19,630 What can we do there? 278 00:17:19,750 --> 00:17:22,010 A lot of things. You can clean up. You can serve lunch to the kids. 279 00:17:22,250 --> 00:17:24,369 Great. And after lunch, we get to scrape it off the cook. 280 00:17:26,190 --> 00:17:28,750 If you don't like the cafeteria, you can work in the school store. 281 00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:30,940 There's visual aids. You can run the projector. 282 00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:32,300 And what do you get for that? 283 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,680 You get credit, Arnold. 284 00:17:34,100 --> 00:17:35,820 It counts like going to a regular class. 285 00:17:37,300 --> 00:17:40,240 Hey, uh... Hey, what do you say, you guys? 286 00:17:41,820 --> 00:17:43,760 A class where there's no tests? 287 00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,660 No homework? 288 00:17:46,060 --> 00:17:47,700 No teachers? No offense. 289 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,120 No offense taken, Arnold. You learn what it's like to have a business. 290 00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:54,960 You deal with customers. You take inventory. 291 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:57,900 And most important of all, you get that diploma. 292 00:17:59,470 --> 00:18:00,470 What do you say? 293 00:18:08,870 --> 00:18:10,150 We'll stay if there's no detention. 294 00:18:12,930 --> 00:18:13,930 Three days' detention. 295 00:18:19,970 --> 00:18:21,010 One day, firm. 296 00:18:22,550 --> 00:18:24,010 Two days, that's my final offer. 297 00:18:25,150 --> 00:18:26,450 You got yourself a deal. 298 00:18:51,590 --> 00:18:54,210 odds in my school store. It's fair enough I have one as vice principal. 299 00:18:54,710 --> 00:18:57,390 Well, perhaps you'd like to speak to the head of our complaint department. 300 00:19:02,950 --> 00:19:04,630 So, what's the problem? 301 00:19:05,030 --> 00:19:08,590 The problem is I think I'm losing my mind. 302 00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:13,410 Sorry, we don't handle small appliances. 303 00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:27,640 Punching Judy. 304 00:19:31,340 --> 00:19:32,340 Hey, 305 00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:34,800 Murray, Murray, once is enough. 306 00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:39,320 You guys got a nice little setup here. It's cute, you know, little bells, but 307 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:42,180 what you need is something you can make a little money on, you know, a little 308 00:19:42,180 --> 00:19:44,300 Christmas club money, you know? Yeah, like what? 309 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:50,040 Just so happens I got the most expensive line of auto parts in all of Brooklyn. 310 00:19:50,640 --> 00:19:54,060 If I don't have it, just show me where it's parked. 311 00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:01,040 We have no intention of... Right. We have no intention of letting you down. 312 00:20:01,060 --> 00:20:02,180 We'll see you on your offer, right? 313 00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:05,640 Oh, he said we'd like to start with some mag wheels. Beautiful. 314 00:20:06,100 --> 00:20:08,240 Right. The racing car type. You got those? 315 00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:10,460 The round ones. Yeah, the oval. Right. Okay. 316 00:20:10,980 --> 00:20:13,140 Could they be steel belted? Hey, no problem. 317 00:20:13,360 --> 00:20:16,220 I know you can do it. And we want them in raised white lettering. You got that? 318 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:19,240 Beautiful choice. Okay. There's one more thing, though. One more. 319 00:20:19,460 --> 00:20:21,620 We want you to get them off a moving car. 320 00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:45,660 Epstein's my name. Visual AIDS is my game. 321 00:20:46,980 --> 00:20:49,240 Oh, sure, sure. Check it out. Check it out. 322 00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:53,040 Hey, hey, don't monkey with it. Don't monkey with it. It took me hours to 323 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:54,040 how to use this machine. 324 00:20:54,180 --> 00:20:55,620 Oh, come on, man. Can you really work that thing? 325 00:20:55,820 --> 00:21:00,820 Oh, sure. Sure, I can. I just ran this film over here for biology class. 326 00:21:01,140 --> 00:21:01,919 Which one is it? 327 00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:03,060 This one right over here. 328 00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:09,540 See what you started trying to... Monkeys. 329 00:21:09,980 --> 00:21:11,520 The school's being run by monkeys. 330 00:21:12,190 --> 00:21:13,310 All right, what's going on here? 331 00:21:13,890 --> 00:21:16,470 What do you mean, what's going on here? I'm showing a film. Can't you see? 332 00:21:19,550 --> 00:21:20,550 Look at this. 333 00:21:21,350 --> 00:21:22,350 Look. 334 00:21:23,550 --> 00:21:24,550 Come here. 335 00:21:27,350 --> 00:21:29,750 Look what your little creepy crawlies are doing. 336 00:21:31,070 --> 00:21:32,070 Look at that store. 337 00:21:32,410 --> 00:21:33,410 This projector. 338 00:21:33,710 --> 00:21:35,010 They're destroying school property. 339 00:21:35,470 --> 00:21:38,830 You gave them these jobs, Connor. This is your responsibility. I want this 340 00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,200 100 % right. You guys are destroying a school property. 341 00:21:57,740 --> 00:22:01,660 Come on, Mr. Codd. I can roll this film up blindfolded. Yeah, Mr. Codd, we'll 342 00:22:01,660 --> 00:22:04,940 take care of that mess. We'll clean it up. Look, that's not the point. 343 00:22:05,180 --> 00:22:07,080 You know it. Hey, come on, Mr. Codd. 344 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,340 It's not like this is Gone with the Wind. 345 00:22:10,860 --> 00:22:12,620 It's just some crummy nature film. 346 00:22:13,100 --> 00:22:15,320 The Armadillo, nature's little tank. 347 00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:20,780 All right, I want you to clean everything up inside the store. I want 348 00:22:20,780 --> 00:22:23,360 clean the projector and the film up, and I want you all to meet me in my office 349 00:22:23,360 --> 00:22:24,360 in five minutes. 350 00:22:24,430 --> 00:22:25,430 Your office? 351 00:22:25,630 --> 00:22:26,790 Yeah, yeah, you know. 352 00:22:27,370 --> 00:22:30,210 His Highness the Vice Principal's office, right? 353 00:22:30,930 --> 00:22:35,250 Oh, boy, Mr. Carter, you really have gone over to the other side. 354 00:22:35,970 --> 00:22:38,070 It's a sad day in Brooklyn. 355 00:22:41,230 --> 00:22:42,230 Hey, 356 00:22:49,570 --> 00:22:50,950 guys, Mr. Carter, how's it going? 357 00:22:51,510 --> 00:22:52,650 Hiya, Vinnie, where you been? 358 00:22:53,210 --> 00:22:54,210 I don't, Vinnie. 359 00:22:54,470 --> 00:22:55,470 Check it out. 360 00:22:57,170 --> 00:22:58,410 You dig my little threads, huh? 361 00:23:01,110 --> 00:23:02,970 Where'd you get the money to buy those new clothes, Vinnie? 362 00:23:03,970 --> 00:23:04,970 I got a job. 363 00:23:05,370 --> 00:23:06,370 You got a job? 364 00:23:06,690 --> 00:23:07,690 Yeah. 365 00:23:07,770 --> 00:23:09,750 Look, man, I quit school. I'm through with it now. 366 00:23:10,210 --> 00:23:12,150 I got me a good job in a county hospital. 367 00:23:13,150 --> 00:23:15,050 You don't say. Vinnie, congratulations. 368 00:23:15,870 --> 00:23:17,770 Hey, Vinnie, man, how'd you get a job in a hospital? 369 00:23:18,490 --> 00:23:20,270 You got experience in doctor stuff? 370 00:23:21,790 --> 00:23:23,630 I just walked in. I got this terrific job. 371 00:23:23,950 --> 00:23:26,750 Vinnie, what kind of job do you get by just walking in and asking for it? 372 00:23:26,950 --> 00:23:29,090 Do you mean you didn't have to play stower? 373 00:23:31,330 --> 00:23:32,470 What are you talking about? 374 00:23:32,730 --> 00:23:35,470 You mean to tell me you didn't have to wheel around a projector for a year? 375 00:23:37,110 --> 00:23:39,750 Vinnie, this job, is there any room for advancement? 376 00:23:40,230 --> 00:23:41,310 What kind of money are you making? 377 00:23:41,550 --> 00:23:42,630 Money, check this out. 378 00:23:43,350 --> 00:23:45,350 All right, 47 big ones. 379 00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:52,520 That's almost a million dollars. 380 00:23:54,660 --> 00:23:56,140 Gee, how do you like that? 381 00:23:56,700 --> 00:23:58,880 We get credit and Vinnie gets cash. 382 00:24:00,780 --> 00:24:03,960 Vinnie, you still didn't tell us what kind of job you got. Oh, he's on a 383 00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:05,220 Come on, take you guys out for pizza. 384 00:24:06,740 --> 00:24:08,600 Yeah, I don't got to take this negativity. 385 00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:12,260 From now on, you can consider me out to lunch. 386 00:24:13,120 --> 00:24:14,120 Permanently. 387 00:24:15,340 --> 00:24:16,340 Yeah, me too. 388 00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:17,680 Come on, Horchette. 389 00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:20,660 I guess I'll be seeing you, Mr. Carter. 390 00:24:21,300 --> 00:24:24,620 Wait a minute. You guys are making a big mistake here. You just say goodbye to 391 00:24:24,620 --> 00:24:25,620 my lucky chair. 392 00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:33,200 Thanks. 393 00:24:36,860 --> 00:24:37,860 Welcome back. 394 00:24:50,670 --> 00:24:53,550 Your dreams were your ticket out. 395 00:24:54,430 --> 00:25:00,330 Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about. 396 00:25:01,230 --> 00:25:04,830 Well, the names have all changed since you hung around. 397 00:25:05,550 --> 00:25:09,330 But those dreams have remained and they've turned around. 398 00:25:10,530 --> 00:25:12,530 Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? 399 00:25:12,730 --> 00:25:18,030 Who'd have thought they'd lead ya? Back here where we need ya. Back here where 400 00:25:18,030 --> 00:25:19,030 we need ya. 401 00:25:19,390 --> 00:25:24,050 We tease him a lot because we got him on the spot. Welcome back. 402 00:25:24,770 --> 00:25:28,490 Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back. 403 00:25:29,070 --> 00:25:32,690 Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back. 404 00:25:33,830 --> 00:25:37,010 We always could spot a friend. 405 00:25:37,990 --> 00:25:39,290 Welcome back. 31531