Original subtitles

Dr. Horace Chilworth, 36.

Very attractive.

Research scientist.

On external examination, I've discovered a single medial lateral incision, which

has been re -sewn for purposes I just don't understand at this time. In any

event, multiple stab wounds.

The angle of entry and depth of the blows indicate a clockwise pattern of

which matches exactly to victim Gwendolyn Benedict, who was...

Pulled from the Lona Creek last Friday.

Dr. Daniel Slade?

Yes, I'm Dr. Slade. We're here to take Dr. Chilworth off your hands.

Just like that.

We do have authorization.

Thank you.

Well, I don't recognize the signature on this document, so the body will just

have to stay with me.

Dr. Chilworth's body has to be turned over to people who are better equipped

deal with it. Well, I can deal with the body just fine.

Now a few gentlemen will excuse me.

Great.

This is the best opening that you've ever written.

I'm not just saying that because I'm your agent.

Thanks for the compliment, but I... I mean, another 350 pages like this, and

you've got your fifth best seller on your hands.

Not even Sue Grafton started this fast.

Well, I'm glad you're so optimistic.

So, where's the rest of it?

Jim, there's a little problem.

That's all. All what?

All the pages I've written.

I haven't got any more.

The publisher expects 350 pages by Friday.

I have writer's block.

You don't have time for writer's block.

If you don't meet this deadline, they'll cancel your contract. And then you'll

have to give back the 25 million advance.

That's it. You see? The money.

It's so intimidating.

Don't.

Forgive me for being such a great agent.

Turning you into the next Mary Higgins Clark.

I want my 2 .5 mil.

Please, don't yell at me. I'm having a hard enough time the way that... You

don't know hard.

If you blow this, I'll make sure that you never sell another book anywhere.

Um, you wouldn't have any ideas, would you?

Any ideas, would I? For all I care. You could kill some poor slob, follow the

police around, and see how they solve it. You just get me those 350 pages by

Friday.

Okay.

Thanks.

That's a much better opening.

Not only was the victim not killed in the woods, but his body was kept in a

freezer for six months.

Now, if it weren't for the forensic entomologist who was able to calculate

amount of maggots in his chest cavity, we might never have known.

That's disgusting.

Oh, but bugs are very hot right now.

And I'm just trying to do my job as your technical advisor.

I know.

And I couldn't write the Danielle Slade novels without you.

You know what? I like the cobra bite in your first book.

You read Deadly Darkness?

Yeah. I have to admit, I only picked it up because Amanda was so giddy about

having her name in print. I'm never giddy.

Four thank you notes and flowers for a week might be considered giddy.

Deadly Darkness is a lot of fun to read. As a matter of fact, I picked up your

other three books, too.

I can't figure out where you get all those great ideas.

Oh, pretty much the way you do things.

It's a fact.

I visualize the murder.

The killer.

The motive.

And then I used the great physical evidence that Amanda always gives me.

I think physical evidence is very important, but it's no more important

behavioral evidence.

Oh, you're right.

In fact, sometimes behavioral is more important.

The real final clue.

The perfect solution to what would otherwise be considered the unsolvable.

And when you find it, you know exactly where you're going.

And when you're going to get there, the moment of perfect synchronicity.

Not that it's easy to find, no way.

And even when you do find it, making the physical and the behavioral work

together is a bitch.

I think I'm going to the ladies' room.

It won't be too much.

It's Kay's purse.

Oh. Will!

You can't call me. It might be important.

Hello?

Hello? Kay?

You there?

Kay isn't here right now. Who's this?

It's Jim.

Why aren't you there?

Call me.

Hello? Kay isn't here right...

It's dead.

Dr. Sloan, if you really needed to make a phone call, I could have loaned you a

quarter.

Actually, your purse was ringing.

Oh.

I'm afraid it was a bad connection. It sounded like somebody, Jim, somebody.

Jim Rothman, my agent. He was being paranoid.

He got me this huge three -book deal, and I have to turn the first manuscript

Friday.

I'm holding on to it just to torture him.

Maybe you ought to call him back.

Oh, not until after we have lunch. He won't stop being twitchy until the check

clears. I should have been a call girl.

It's a lot easier way to make a living.

It's Professor.

Oh, great.

And you really own it? Yeah, me and my son met the blurry -eyed young man in

scrub room.

Let me go take care of this. Excuse me.

Busy, huh? No kidding.

Twelve -hour shift, three nurses out sick. We had a bus crash and an outbreak

chicken pox at a computer conference.

Ow, and now this.

What is this?

It smells like coffee. So does that stuff at the hospital. We all know what

tastes like.

This is my restaurant.

I ordered Costa Rican.

Where is it?

Steve. He canceled my beans.

How could he cancel my beans? I let him have these plastic little ketchup

bottles. I want my coffee.

There's been a homicide.

Okay, I'm sorry. We need you to identify the body.

That's Jim, all right?

You all right?

No, not exactly.

That's my agent with a... whatever.

Stuck in his chest?

It's the letter opener.

And then there's this.

What's this?

A scorpion.

Ooh, well, message from the killer, I'd imagine.

I have no idea what it means.

Well, it doesn't make sense, not at all.

Well, it will.

I hope so.

I really do.

This isn't a field trip for pencil -pushing civilians.

You're a civilian, Sue, and you're also a pencil pusher.

Damn right, I'm one of Jim Rothman's best clients.

But... Once a cop, always a cop.

Retired Sergeant Mullen was meeting Rothman for lunch. He found the body.

immediately secured the crime scene as I've done so many times before.

Right. From the front seat of the chief's car.

You were a driver, not a detective.

Baby, I saw more on the streets when I was with the chief than any detective

could see in a lifetime.

That's what gives my books the stink of realism.

Yeah, well, you've got the stink part right.

See, look at this. Two coffee cups.

One of them could be the killer's.

Nope. Coffee's too cold.

Timing's all wrong.

Let's test these for prints.

Look at this.

Page 102 to 130.

Huh.

Chapter 12 is missing.

I noticed that, too. Glad to see you're keeping up. I'll have it checked.

Now, that's odd.

Hmm. Three books.

Upside down? Uh -huh.

Well, Sloan, looks like you've got a tough one here. You know, there aren't

many clues.

But if there's anything else I can do to help, you know where to find me.

He wonders why no one gave him a retirement present.

Who could have done this?

Don't worry.

We'll figure it out.

Thanks.

what clues were left behind.

Well, for one, there was the letter opener left in literary agent Horace

Chilworth's chest.

Somehow appropriate, yet ordinary.

Then there were the three mundane textbooks all turned upside down.

Greenagraph in six days, kickboxing with Dickie Kimber, and low -cal desserts

for two. Ordinary.

Then we had, oh yes, the scorpion in the jar.

Definitely not ordinary.

And the rifled manuscript. Could this be the deed of some disgruntled writer who

was angered by Kilworth's cool response to his or her work? And if so, why steal

the 12th chapter of his or her manuscript?

Brilliant. Brilliant only if you can figure it out. I think you left too many

clues hanging around.

There was the rifled manuscript.

The three upside -down books and that damn scorpion.

What on earth were you thinking about? I don't know. I just thought it would be

interesting on the jacket copy.

You're not playing fair with your readers. You cannot plant clues not

where they lead.

Well, that's the problem. I don't know where anything leads anymore.

Well, then how are you going to work us through this one?

I'm not.

Mark Sloan will do it for me.

Very creative.

Amanda Bentley's always saying how brilliant he is.

Why not use him?

Especially now that I'm stuck with a dead whore of Chilworth and no idea who

killed him. And Mark Sloan won't figure out that you're the one who killed Jim

Rothman, right?

No way.

I left so many clues he'll be swimming in a school of red herring.

Well, I'll use his deductions.

for our basic plot points, and then we'll fill in the interesting parts, and

can make alterations when it becomes mundane or simplistic.

Not bad.

Hello?

Oh, um, well, of course, Dr. Sloan. I don't know what I can do, but I'll

certainly try.

Jim meant a lot to me.

The three upside -down books were all written by a client that Mr. Rothman

dropped earlier this past year. Now, Steve figured that out when he looked at

Rothman's records.

Well, Steve checked their alibis. One of them's dead, and two of them don't even

live in L .A. anymore.

So if there's a message there, I don't see what it is. Well, we can't be

already. I mean, you said yourself that there was a chapter missing out of that

manuscript, and perhaps the killer took it with him.

Especially if the chapter included something damaging.

Well, I don't think that's it. I mean, it was written by that actor, Bruce

Blazer. He doesn't have any secrets.

Everybody has secrets.

Not Bruce.

And even if he did, he'd use them to get himself a cover story in the National

Enquirer. How can you talk about the star of Tuttle and the Mummy like that?

Tuttle and the Mummy?

You know him?

Sure. Harry Tuttle and his partner, the Mummy, were supernatural crime fighters

in a 60s TV show.

They rerun it on one of those cable stations at 2 a .m.

What, you guys never had insomnia?

Not that bad.

Tuttle and the Mummy was cancelled in 1968 and became an instant cult hit.

Bruce has been living off the persona ever since.

And writing these disgustingly effective occult thrillers for the last ten

years. The man's a walking money machine.

Then he wouldn't want to kill Jim Rothman.

Unless he suspected that Jim was trying to cheat him.

Loyalty wasn't exactly in Jim Rothman's lexicon.

We'd better find out what's in that missing chapter.

So let's go.

I don't think so, because this is a police investigation, and I am the

But you're not a writer.

I know these people. I know this world.

I could save you a lot of time.

Jim was my agent?

She's right.

She'd be a big help.

I don't know why I bother.

You never went anywhere without that food.

My partner, the mummy, fighting evil whenever it threatens the innocent.

That's, uh, that's good.

Ted was, uh, largely responsible for the success of Tuttle and the Mummy.

The fans loved him.

And what happened to him?

He was clocked by a golf ball on the 17th hole at Pebble Beach.

Turned him into a vegetable.

That's when I started writing.

Doing personal appearances with Adam just seemed all wrong.

The demon roared with indignation at the intrusion into his dark sanctuary by

such virginal interlopers.

Creeping crawlers.

The prose is a little purple, isn't it, Bruce?

Not the gritty realism of Daniel Slade conducting autopsies in a halter top.

At least I can write.

We didn't come for a literary critique, so if you could just print us out a copy

of chapter 12 of your latest manuscript.

I don't use a computer.

Deflexic. Hmm.

That must make it hard.

Dreadfully. Well, maybe you could just tell us what was in it, then.

Yeah.

I, uh... Actually, I haven't read that far.

It's your book.

All those stunts I did on the show did bad things to my short -term memory.

Or maybe you didn't write it in the first place.

You have a ghostwriter?

Sid always said that writing is 10 % inspiration, 90 % perspiration.

I don't like to sweat.

Sid Abernathy?

That no -talent drudge is your ghostwriter?

My creative collaborator.

Well, don't be so shocked.

All writers need a little help now and then.

Well, maybe we should have a little talk with your helper.

Why would anyone want to be a ghostwriter anyway? Nobody knows what

accomplished.

Money.

Besides, those books would never sell under Abernathy's name.

Well, how would he know if he didn't try?

He did.

Remember that passage I read from Bruce's book?

It was originally in one of Abernathy's own detective novels.

He not only steals from himself, he steals the worst part.

You're so bad, why do you read him?

Well, don't you keep up with other detectives?

Not the same thing.

Oh, sure it is. Case loads, bestseller lists, it's all competition.

Mr. Abernathy?

Hey, it's open.

No. You're right inside. Go on in. You're not going to solve this one for

too?

How you doing, Sloan? Bentley?

Doctor? Don't tell me you had an appointment with Abernathy. Oh, no.

scanner. You know you've got to keep up with these radio calls. Never know when

I might be able to lend a hand.

I don't know how we're going to figure this one out without you, Sloan.

Sit Abernathy.

Looks like one of his disgruntled fans decided to save the world for more Rick

Steele novels.

Noble motive.

Looks like we've got a serial killer on our hands. You do? You know, preying on

the literati. And that's his calling card.

I like his style.

I'll tell you what, while I'm here, why don't I go out and check the perimeter,

see what you've missed? I'd appreciate that.

Yeah. I think we have a novel here.

I get first dibs, baby.

That is the most silly, stupid, impulsive idea.

Well, it's an interesting puzzle, all right.

Well, you don't think Archie could be right, do you?

About the serial killer?

I mean, the crime is identical.

Well, I admit it doesn't look a lot like Rothman's place, but somehow it just

doesn't feel like the work of a serial killer.

What does it feel like?

Confusing. The same M .O. as Horst Chilworth's murder.

A single upward thrust with a letter opener.

Piercing the descending aorta.

Causing rapid exsanguination.

And death.

There is a difference.

And it is a significant one, one I must not overlook.

This latest victim was stung before he was

killed.

This is way too confusing.

Mark alone is confused.

I'm not.

Well, why aren't you? I mean, we have two killers now.

Yeah, you offed Rothen, but you didn't off Abernathy. I know. Isn't that great?

Yeah, I hate when you get to this part of a book. You become positively

delusional. I'm not delusional. I'm excited.

This thing finally has a life of its own. That's a good thing, too. It's

starting to get a little straight line in the plot.

It needed a few more twists.

Twists?

Come on.

That's nothing.

300 pages while he or she interviews suspects before rounding them all up in

end and dazzling them with deductive reasoning.

I'm all for action.

Remember when you wrote Praying Mantis and I used a corpse's rib at my kendo

stick?

Yeah,

that was good.

I don't know who killed Sid Abernathy or why.

But this shows that if you plant a couple good what -ifs, the whole

just lays itself out.

Oh, if you really believe that, you would have had a manuscript ready

A dull one.

This is definitely not dull.

Well, you're right about that, at least.

Where do we go from here?

Where else?

Back to Mark Snow.

Oh, I asked for coffee.

I know, but there will be none. At least not until the good stuff gets here.

Hey, I know these books.

Got the Dance of Death series.

Rick Steele. Super Spy.

Fast with its fists.

Faster on its feet.

Jesse has very low literary standards.

Sid Abernathy happens to be a great writer. His constant reworking of

themes and scenes makes him one of the most complex contemporary American

writers. Look at Cha -Cha Choker's brilliant use of metaphor.

And then there's Lindy Hop Lunatic.

And that one, Rick is chasing after this serial killer who preys on swing dance

competition. Look at this right here.

Cha -Cha Choker right on the edge of Jim Rothman's desk.

That one was great.

And that one, Rick Steele uses a dead guy's rib as a kendo stick to battle the

forces of evil.

That shot -shot choker is missing from Abernathy's personal library.

You mean he took an already published book to his agent? That doesn't make any

sense. Maybe not, but the lab guys found something in Abernathy's computer that

does. A blackmail note.

The whole world will soon know the lying thief you really are.

I guess ghostwriting just doesn't pay enough.

Did you find that chapter 12 from Blazer's book that Abernathy was

-hmm. The hero...

who thinks he's turning into a vampire, gets on a plane for Albania and reviews

the eerie events of the past 11 chapters.

If there was information the killer wanted to hide, he would have had to

the entire manuscript.

At least that red herring is dead. I told you you left too many clues lying

around.

You know, um, this isn't working. Why don't we just drop it? Why? When it's

getting interesting.

We managed to trace the jars the scorpions were in.

Wopak Greek olives.

There's only a couple of stores in the L .A. area that carry them, so I'm going

to check the surveillance tapes and see if any of Rothman's clients are

regulars. You see that just when you're about to give up, the perfect clue pops

right up.

It wasn't plagiarism.

My subconscious merely borrowed a few elements from a book I barely remember

reading. Praying mantis is a lie?

My whole life is a lie, a lie.

Yes, yes, I made you up. Oh, don't you become a realist on me now.

Oh, damn.

Wolfpack Greek olives. You don't have the plotting ability of a wombat.

Go away.

Hi. Hi.

Uh, yeah, come in.

My setup you've got.

Everything you need, huh?

Tools of my trade. Can't do without them.

Kind of like surveillance cameras are the tools of my trade.

Kind of, I guess.

You take a nice surveillance photo.

Especially the one from Lindler's Market, where they sell these.

Wopak olives.

Glad you left the scorpion home.

Oh, there was no scorpion.

I got this from a recycled bin.

You were digging in my garbage?

It's always interesting.

Look, Lieutenant, don't play cat and mouse with me. It won't work.

I didn't kill Jim Rothman.

Well, we don't think you did.

You don't?

You didn't have motive. I mean, he just got near that big deal.

And he didn't have opportunity.

He called you before he was killed, and from that point on, you were with that

and Amanda.

I know that.

But you were at the scene of the Rothman murder.

You went over every piece of evidence with us.

And it made you realize it was a perfect opportunity to kill your blackmailer.

What blackmailer?

Sid Abernathy.

Sid wasn't blackmailing me.

Even though you stole from Cha -Cha Choker?

Figured that out, did you?

When Jesse was telling us about Rick Steele and the kendo stick, Dad

a similar scene from Praying Mantis.

Where Danielle fights off the bad guys with the corpse's rib.

You did plagiarize Abernathy.

Borrowed. Borrowed.

Unconsciously. Just a tiny part.

But I didn't kill him.

I'm not a copycat.

Then why were there olive jars from your favorite brand at both murder scenes?

I wish I could answer that.

So do I.

Since you can't, I'm afraid I have to arrest you for the murder.

I framed myself for a murder I didn't commit.

By committing the murder I did commit.

And I can't convince them I didn't commit the second murder unless I admit

committed the first one.

You know, I usually like it when a character starts taking over the story,

this is getting a little out of control.

Oh, I think it's Dr. Sloan who's gotten out of control. And what about all those

red herrings he's supposed to be swimming in? Don't start with me.

At least you told the truth about the blackmail.

Yeah, the truth will set me free.

No, but it'll make a great ending.

Oh, Amanda, thank you for coming to get me.

I'm just glad I was in the path lab when you called.

I didn't know how I was going to get home after I posted Bill. You know how I

hate taxis.

I can't believe they're doing this to you. I told Steve he was all wrong.

he is.

I said if Kay Ludlow really wanted to kill Sid Abernathy, she would have

of something more intelligent.

Nefarious. Exactly.

And you're a mystery writer. I mean, there's no way that you would have been

sloppy enough to leave all those obvious clues lying around.

Amanda, the real clue is still out there.

And he might be getting ready to kill another one of Jim's clients. Maybe even

me.

Okay, no one's going to kill you.

All we need to do is find out who committed the first murder.

We do?

Absolutely. And once that person confesses to both murders, well, you'll

and clear.

Yeah.

Right. Great.

Okay, come on. Let's go over and talk to Mark about it.

Hey.

Didn't you kill Sid Abernathy?

No, she didn't, Jess.

I knew he'd believe you.

You know, it's possible that this was about killing Sid Abernathy and

Jim Rothman was just a point of story to Kay. And since Rothman called Kay just

before he died... She had an alibi that the real killer couldn't have known

about.

So who is our killer?

Why would I kill my co -author, ghostwriter?

The real unknown author of Creeping Crawlers? I'll read the acknowledgments.

He's mentioned prominently in every one of my books.

Acknowledgments aren't royalties. And why would someone as famous as you go

ahead and hire a ghostwriter anyway?

Hmm. Writer's block?

Laziness?

Paranoia?

General lack of talent?

Or all of the above.

The truth is, Tuttle and the Mummy made me famous.

Once you've been a celebrity, it's hard to go back to being a nobody.

And being a best -selling author made you famous all over again.

Fame of a different kind.

But I'm certainly not complaining.

Maybe Sid Abernathy got tired of still being a nobody.

Not a chance. The man had no ego.

But he loved money.

As long as he got paid, he didn't mind being used.

And how much is being used worth these days?

A lot.

Fortunately, I could afford it.

Maybe somebody else decided they couldn't.

So where are we going now?

Dad's found something at Abernathy's house.

Do people really read this stuff?

Only people with bad taste, which explains Jesse's infatuation with him.

You said you found something?

Yeah. You know, Abernathy's got quite a collection of books.

Oh, well.

Most authors have big collections. It's sort of an addiction.

None of Abernathy's books are organized except on this one shelf.

These are alphabetized by author.

That's not all.

This is everything any one of these authors ever wrote, including Bruce

Exactly. All of these books are books that Sid Abernathy ghost wrote. Then why

are retired Sergeant Archie Mullins' books here?

Probably because all he ever knew about the street was how to find one on a map.

I think you better have a talk with him.

reinforcement? Shut up.

Archie, this is a friend.

Yes, darling.

You know the cops are on to you. They know you killed your ghostwriter.

They're on their way. If I were you, I would run.

Run, run, run.

You know what they do to cops in jail.

Bye -bye.

You're warning your suspect?

No. I do hate to manipulate the plot like that.

I recall you giving an interview to one of those unbearably pretentious literary

periodicals, and you prided yourself on letting your characters, namely me, tell

the story.

Well, I does feel a little ham -fisted.

Unless you're becoming one of those terribly plot -heavy hack writers you

profess to hate.

Like Sid Abernathy?

Well, let's face it.

He couldn't have been all that bad. You did steal a book from the man. It was a

plot point.

It wasn't stealing. It was an homage.

I thought you called it unconscious borrowing. Look, Danielle, this is the

solution, okay?

If Archie Mullen runs away, they'll blame both murders on him, and they'll

forget about me and about Jim Rothman, and I can finally type the end on this

nightmare, and I can even make sure that Archie doesn't write a book about it

before I do.

Okay, are we ready? Thank you very much.

I did some more checking on the way over. Turns out Mullen was on

one of those grocery store surveillance tapes.

Don't tell me you missed one.

No, one of the clerks took it home to record a couple of South Park episodes.

You know, but Lucky didn't tape over everything.

See, in real life, not everything comes easy.

No. At least you were able to locate that pet store when Mullen bought that

scorpion. Oh, no. People use scorpions as pets?

No wonder Mullen used a ghost rider. He's not very good at hiding his set

Get out of here, Sloan!

You're just making this worse, Archie. You know how to fight for a carpentry,

Sloan! Now get out of here!

I'm calling for backup, Archie. You know what happens if you don't give it up

now.

Yeah!

Amanda?

How it ends.

You all right?

I'm perfect.

Doesn't make sense.

Archie Mullen wasn't the gung -ho, self -sacrificing type.

No, he said he was afraid of prison.

Not enough to keep him from killing Rothman and Abernathy.

No.

Blackmail can make you stupid.

At least it makes my character stupid.

Looks like it had the same effect on Mullum, too.

Same note we found on Abernathy's computer.

I wonder how many people he's gonna blackmail.

He certainly put the wrong person to start with.

I guess Archie did exactly what we thought he did.

Killed Rothman to set up Kay for both murders.

And when Kay was released, and he thought that his plan was going to fail,

decided to depart in a poorly thought -out blaze of glory.

Well. It's never a good idea to kill off your protagonist.

No, it definitely isn't.

It is nice to close both cases at once.

Kay, how are you with all of this? I mean, now that it's over and you have to

get a new agent.

Oh, I'm okay.

In fact, maybe we could talk about that maggot stuff after all.

For my next book.

And there will be a next book.

Don't worry. Oh, I'm not worried.

Well, you don't look happy.

I don't like these kind of surprises.

Always makes me think I missed something.

I know.

It's like when I write and it turns up short.

I'm sure that I've missed a big chunk of the story.

Have you?

Well, sometimes.

But usually it means that the story was too simple to begin with and that the

solution was too easy to find.

So I just put it in a drawer and start something new.

Maybe I ought to put this in a drawer.

Yeah.

Want some?

We back in the coffee bit? Yeah, even I compromise. I get the Costa Rican beans,

but then we have to cut it with the canned stuff.

Sounds fair.

I thought the Abernathy Rothman case was closed now that Mullen is dead. Well,

it is, supposedly.

We've got coasters now?

Oh, yeah.

You know what it does to public morale?

The water rings everywhere?

You know something, Jesse?

Mullen's dead. I think the killer's still out there. And I know just what to

about it. Put that on my tab.

I told you Mark Sloan would get me my plot and miss the truth besides.

You got lucky.

I got enough material for a dozen books.

There is the self -sacrificing cop story.

The blackmail scheme story. The missing author story.

Kay Ludlow.

I know what you did.

Did? His spirit will walk until it's avenged.

What are you talking about?

And I will be the instrument of that vengeance.

What vengeance?

Archie Mullen may be dead by another's hand, but the fault lies with you.

Oh, come on, Bruce.

As to the deaths of Jim Rothman and Sid Abbott.

You know, you really should stop watching your old reruns. You're not

Tuttle.

I approve.

What? And so will the police.

Very soon.

And then, the restless can rest.

Wait a minute. I didn't kill Sid Abernathy.

I believe I have to drop another body.

But it's an excellent final chapter. Besides, it'll fix that lame ending

got right now.

When did you get so pragmatic?

Oh, God.

I don't want to know.

Hello.

We did the same thing in episode 39.

You should have been watching my old reruns.

I thought you were going to put it in the drawer.

Well, I tell you, I'm never satisfied when it gets that easy.

I'm the same way.

So how did you know?

Well, you write detective stories.

What's missing in this scene compared to Jim Rothman's office?

The upside -down books, different titles?

Nice guess.

But wrong.

Rifled manuscript.

Chapter 12 is missing, I assume, but irrelevant. Right.

Well,

there's the damn scorpion and coffee cup.

No coasters. No coasters.

When you were Barbecue Bob's, you always found yourself a coaster to put on your

coffee cup.

And you did the same thing in Jim Rothman's office.

But after Nathie's house, there were no coasters at all.

And Archie Mullen's kitchen table was covered with water rings.

Oh, the man never used a coaster in his life.

Well, obviously it wouldn't occur to him to use one in Jim Rothman's office

either. Hmm.

You know...

This could add a whole new layer of psychological motivation to my killer. I

could blame his murderous bent on an obsessively, compulsively neat mother.

Well,

I did have an alibi for the time of Jim's murder. Yes, you did, and it was a

neat piece of plotting, too.

Instead of making us believe that you were nowhere near Rothman when he was

killed, you made us believe that he was alive when he was actually already dead.

I like that.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Well, simple is usually best.

That's what Mommy always told me.

Brilliant powers of deduction behind that body wrap.

But obviously there was a mistake.

Rothman asked why you weren't there.

Now, that's something you'd say to an answering machine, not to a bad

on a cell phone.

I don't know.

That's kind of weak on the physical evidence.

But terrific on the behavioral.

You should have modeled me after him.

I still didn't kill Sid Abernathy. It really was Archie Mullen.

We know.

Please, apologize to Amanda for me.

I guess I'm not as good as either one of us would like me to be.

But I was telling the truth. There will be another book.

Why did you kill Jim Rothman in the first place? Was he trying to cheat you?

No.

Nothing that defensible.

Writer's block.

You have no idea.

You need a drink after you, you know.

Great kiss.

Too bad that's all we've got time for.

Great plan, show worth.

And almost a perfect murder. Two perfect murders.

The false... Clues, the apparent coffee cat killing, all to cover the fact that

you plagiarized your last book.

Hello, Lieutenant.

Yes, I have the real literary agent killer.

The end.

Brilliant. Really brilliant.

I still didn't get to sleep with the very attractive Horace Chilworth.

Wait till I write the prison breakout story.

You're going to love it.