All language subtitles for diagnosis_murder_s01e03_murder_at_the_telethon

Welcome to the Buddy Blake Show.

And here he is now, the star of our
show, Mr.

Buddy Blake.

How do, how do, how do, how do.

Buddy B, Buddy B.

Welcome to the Buddy Blake Variety Hour.
Do you believe it's 1973?

Hey, we've been on the air for seven
years.

Count them.

Thank you.

Thank you so much. Your applause gets
right here.

Or is it here?

Maybe it's heartburn. Hey, I had
leftovers for lunch that kept staring at

You don't think that's funny?

Listen to me.

I'm here to tell you that that is funny.
Do you know how much of my jokes... How

much more of my jokes... Wait! I did it
for you! I did it for you!

You never did this to Pearl.

understand michael michael michael i'm
here dad michael i'm here they killed me

relax they killed me i'm blind no you
just had to dream again just relax here

here take peace okay take deep breaths
okay take deep breaths okay what now

a bad dream what the hell kind of doctor
did you get me all these pills all

these pills And they can't stop a simple
nightmare?

They're just sleeping pills.

Oh, they're gonna help you, Dad. Gonna
help you. Help me?

Look at me.

Some doctor.

Thanks for nothing, Michael.

Get away from me.

You give me the creeps.

My throat is very dry.

Give me some juice.

What's the matter, Dad? You afraid the
dreams might come true?

Compadre, I have some very exciting
news. Your presentation to the board, by

keeping the emergency room open, is
tremendously effective.

They're going to fund it for another
year?

No, you and I are going to raise the
money. You and I.

How are we going to do that, Norman?
We're having a telethon.

I've already started the ball rolling. I
booked KCDM for two weeks from Sunday

at no cost.

I know this is a big project, amigo, but
if we put on a full court press, you

could pull it off.

I can pull it off?

I'm booked on this Caribbean cruise
seminar on cost accounting, but I'll be

in time for the telethon itself.

Congratulations, compadre.

I'll send you a postcard, Mark.

Thanks.

Jack, I can't thank you enough for stage
managing this affair.

Come on, no sweat.

I had to do this once in high school.
It's kind of fun.

I got Phil covered for me at the
hospital, so... Oh!

That does not belong there!

Okay, and you're going to coordinate the
talent, right, Dolores?

Well, if you can call them that. Where
did you get these people from?

Carlo, the cavorting camp.

So we've got to be grateful for what we
can get.

Need I remind you guys, if we don't
raise at least $100 ,000 during that 24

hours, we close the emergency room
doors.

I'm on the case.

I've got to ask you something. Why did
you get this guy, Buddy Blake, to host

this thing? I mean, who remembers him?

Jack, the man's a TV legend.

He was number one on television from the
late 60s through to the early 70s.

You know, they used to call him Mr. Boob
Tube. But in those days, it was a

compliment. Who cares?

Hey, guys, the band goes to the left,
all right?

Yeah, look, I'm sorry I'm late.

Well, it's all right. I need you.

You know what's really got me excited is
we've got almost all the old crew

together. We've got his old sidekick,
Hank Mallory. We've got the two writers,

Monty and Sarah Emerson, all coming
together.

Oh, that is great.

I can't believe it. Buddy Blake is right
here.

This is the welcoming committee of
Governor Hammer?

Hank, Monty, Sarah, where are they? I
don't know, Dad. I thought they'd be

by now. Oh, you thought. I thought I
smelled something burning.

Why don't we hire somebody to do your
thing for you, and then we'll know it'll

be done properly.

Uh, Mr. Blake? That's me. I'm Dr. Mark
Sloan from Community General. I cannot

tell you what an honor it is to finally
meet you. Well, try, try.

Excuse me?

Hey, Doctor, you know what you're gonna
do? Call me Buddy.

All right. Buddy?

I'd like to meet my son.

Steve. Oh, it's a pleasure.

Dr. Sloan.

It's good to see you. How are you? Do
you know that I was this man's teacher

med school?

Very, very promising student who
shouldn't have dropped out, by the way.

I've heard this before.

Ann.

You must be Mrs. Blake.

Oh, please call me Marcy.

What are you waiting for, idiot boy?

Take this stuff to the dressing room.

Marcy. May I call you Marcy? Could you
get me some tea? It isn't going to make

me throw up. Go, go, go.

Well.

Folks, let's get this show on the road,
shall we? This way, Mr. Blake. I'm going

to put up Dolores. Oh, good. Thanks.

Mr. Blake. Yes.

Jack Stewart.

I'm a huge fan of yours. Well, I'm a
stage manager.

What about Crazy House?

Good. How about take it from the slab?

Oh, Hank.

Hank Mallory, you old bag of bones.

God's been good to you. You're still
breathing. Oh, buddy.

No. No, no, no. You're supposed to say
how happy you are to see me.

This is the best check I've been out in
the whole business. Look at this guy.

You give this guy a kick in the butt, he
takes it better than anybody.

The best.

Whoa, look what the cat dragged in. My
two favorite writers.

Arthur. Arthur.

Never wrote a joke I didn't have to fix.

Correct me if I'm wrong, are you still
both happily divorced?

I guess that does it for hello, eh,
buddy?

Yeah, we're still divorced, buddy. Hey,
bingo.

In case you're interested, Monty and I
haven't seen each other in years.

Tell you the truth, I'm not that
interested.

Okay, the reunion is over.

Children, everybody, in my dressing
room. I need Washington jokes, Bill and

Hillary jokes. I want them put into the
Robin Hood sketch. And no pun, or you're

dead meat.

Doc, get my lunch, will you please? No
oil, no salt, no taste. My job, grin and

bear it. Your job, go fetch it.

All right, Doc, go.

Fetch. The fetching duck.

I'm back, Mark.

Oh, hello, Norman. How was your cruise?

Buddy Blake did the best he could do.

There are a lot of people who remember
and love Buddy Blake. It'll work fine.

Fine. I'm calling Jerry Lewis.

And now, here is your host for the first
annual Community General Emergency Room

Telethon, Mr.

Boat Tube, Buddy Blake!

How do, how do?

How dee -dee -dee -dee -doo. It's me,
Buddy B.

I cannot tell you how wonderful it is
for me to be here in Vegas.

Wait.

Wrong jacket.

Oh,

I know. I know you're thinking what a
warm and funny guy this Buddy Blake is.

And if you're not, why aren't you?

Hey, you know when my good friend Dr.
Mark Sloan...

called me and asked me to do this
telethon, I had one question for the

doctor. When do you want me?

And here I am.

Thank you.

Okay.

Before we get this stuffing going, the
stuffing going, I've got it going now.

Before we get things started, I want
every one of you wonderful people out

in television land to call up and make a
generous pledge because this time

tomorrow night, We have got to raise
$100 ,000!

And women as well!

And remember, I know where you live!

Okay, it gives me great pleasure to
bring you the auntie of Carlo, the

cavorting cavo!

Let's hear it!

All right!

Oh, what a... Careful with that nose.

Enjoy. Dad,

Dad, can I talk to you for a second? You
moron.

We're going to chip in and get you a
brain.

How dare you book me in with my show?

Don't shush me.

Don't shush me. I'll turn you into a
doormat and I'll wipe my feet off on

You think you're a man?

You're a useless parasite.

Look, I'm through being your whipping
boy.

Oh, really?

What are you going to become, a doctor?

A mean, self -centered old has -been.
And you're lucky to be here.

Don't you walk away from me.

I just did.

No one's answering the phone.

They're not ringing.

Exactly.

Where's Jerry Lewis?

I left a message.

He'll pick up, Ronald.

How's it going?

Well, unless it's on Phil, then Buddy
and his Robin Hood sketch is up next.

No, he's up now.

Clear. Some of us are working. Finally.

We're working.

We're working. Clear, clear. Where the
hell is that idiot son of mine? He's

needed for brain surgery in my dressing
room immediately.

I can't find my hairpiece.

I can't work like this.

Somebody has to solve.

You. I'll get ready. You solve.

Get out of my way.

No. Oh, no, sir. No, hey, guy. Wait. No.

What?

Hello there. I'm Dr.

Mark Sloan.

the camera, Doc.

Oh.

Talk.

I'd like to talk to you about the
importance of our emergency room

You know, emergency room service is a
medical service that's available to

very few people at this moment because
so many of our emergency rooms around

city have closed, and it's very
important that we keep this one open.

Dad? Oh, very funny.

What's the matter? What's the matter?

And I can assure you, if you have never
seen this sketch, you all are in for a

real treat.

It's what I would call a classic TV
sketch.

Some of you are probably, a lot of you
are probably too young to have ever seen

it, so get out your... Oh, here comes
Buddy. I mean, Bobby.

Call an ambulance.

I'm sorry.

Buddy, the order was punctured. We
didn't make it.

We did everything we could.

I know it's a shock.

Mrs.

Blake, my deepest sympathy.

Where's the phone?

It's down the hall.

But he was such a wonderful guy.

A real humanitarian.

He was an original talent.

There'll never be another one like him.
Never.

Excuse me, Dad.

Could I speak to you for a minute,
please?

Excuse me a moment.

Where's Michael Blaine?

He's down the hall. Why?

I'm here to arrest him for the murder of
his father.

Michael?

I know Michael. He didn't kill his dad.

Dad, I've got my doubts, too, but look
at the evidence.

I saw him fight with his father.

He was alone in the dressing room with
him. Buddy Blake ends up with a knife in

his back, and Michael's got blood on his
hands.

D .A. says that's all we need.

Give me a moment with him, I am.

Go ahead.

But he wasn't always so terrible, you
know?

Well, difficult, sir, and bad -tempered.

But in the old days, you know, when his
show was on, there were times...

Oh, I wish I hadn't have said those
things to him.

I called him a has -been.

Oh, I know that hurt him.

I guess I loved him in spite of himself.

Michael, I hate to have to tell you
this.

The police think that you killed your
father.

Oh, they don't really believe that.

I'm afraid they do.

You don't believe that, do you?

No.

What am I going to do, Mark?

I don't know. Maybe I can help.

Do you know anyone who might want to
kill Buddy?

Yeah, sure. Any one of those four down
there waiting and pretending to grieve.

They all hated that.

Do you know exactly why?

Yeah. It's all that dirt I did in
printing my book.

It takes time.

Mr.

Blake? I'm afraid I'm going to have to
place you under arrest for the murder of

your father.

Greetings, Mr. Ryan.

You have the right to remain silent.

Michael didn't kill his father.

Yeah, I can't believe it either. But
right now, all the evidence points to

I had no choice but to arrest him.

I think one of those four people killed
Buddy Blake.

That's going to be very hard to prove.

No trouble is with Buddy gone. They're
all going to leave town.

I can't stop them.

I'll see you back at the studio. All
right.

As you know, Buddy Blake was just rushed
to Community General's emergency room.

Our thoughts and prayers are for his
full recovery.

This tragedy just points out the
importance of our emergency room

What if we were closed today?

Buddy Blake may not have survived.

And so we could...

Unfortunately, even the valiant efforts
of our emergency room crew could not...

Buddy Blake did not survive. He passed
away a few

moments ago.

As shocking as this is, and what could
be more shocking than the untimely

of a truly great man, let us remember
that Buddy Blake's last wish...

was to raise as much money as possible
for the hospital he loved, Community

General. So we will continue on with our
telethon, but just one reason, Buddy

Blake would want it that way.

Yes, and now,

thank you.

And now, how about a nice welcome for a
wonderful pair of ballroom dancers,

Marvin and Maxine. Let's hear it, come
on.

Marvin and Maxine.

I know how upset you all must be.

But I also know you all came down here
out of your great love for Buddy.

So I'm asking you to see this telethon
through in Buddy's memory.

I can't get a plane out till tomorrow
anyway.

Monty and I used to do an act together.

Do you remember it, honey?

Sure, sure, we could do that.

I was rehearsing some bits Buddy would
have loved.

I'll stay.

Thank you.

Thank you all.

Let me tell you something.

I think Steve is right.

How are you going to prove that one of
those four people killed Buddy? I don't

know yet.

How's it going out there? Ever since
Buddy got killed, we shot up to 27 ,000.

But after that, he just died. I'm
telling you, somebody's got to front

thing. Where's Briggs? He's lying in the
back with an ice pack on his head. Huh?

He's fine. He's nervous.

Dad, Elvis has left the building and
Dolores can't find him anywhere. Great.

Steve, my boy.

What do you want?

Do you remember mentioning that you'd do
anything to help out?

Yeah. Take the list of acts out there
and read them as they come on. That's

you have to do. Dad, I can't do that.
Look, Steve, it's for the emergency

I'm not a performer, Dad. I don't even
like to get up in front of people. All

right. Don't do this.

Say something.

How do you like to sew shofar?

Uh, yeah, you can give me a hand with
this. It's stuck.

Here it is.

Do you think Michael killed Buddy?

Looks that way, doesn't it?

Obviously, you don't.

Uh, no. No, I don't.

But I think someone close to him did.

Like his widow?

His rich widow?

If all I wanted was the money, I would
have divorced the slob 20 years ago.

Well, I guess to wear a bikini.

Well, but then if you just divorced him,
you'd only get half the money.

With the Michael out of the way, you get
the whole estate.

I do now.

Just toss this and the rest of the stuff
here.

Where were you when Buddy was killed?

None of your business.

That's where I was.

That was the three little piggies doing
my achy bacon heart.

Our next act will be appearing nightly
at the Gallery Barn Grill. Please

Waldo the Juggler.

Marcy Blake is starting to look like a
prime suspect. Keep an eye on her.

Hold down the floor.

I want to talk to you.

They're sitting on their hands out
there. I mean, can't those comedy

give me a few jokes? I'm dying out
there.

Steve, would you like something cold to
drink, maybe?

Yeah, make it a diet soda, lots of ice,
please.

Makeup?

I just spoke to you. You must have
broken old speed records between San

Francisco and Denver.

No, no, Herb, I don't think that's a
good idea. Somebody might see us

Me too.

I know.

Okay, well, meet me in the lobby of the
Crown Region Hotel.

Okay, bye.

Yeah, give me the phone.

Hey, don't listen.

I need to send some flowers to Buddy
Blake's room, all right?

Thank you.

Let's go to our tote board, shall we?

Well, I see we're a little short of our
$100 ,000 goal, so please keep those

calls coming in.

Our next act is a...

Very talented dancer who's here with
her... Snakes.

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome
Sahar.

One minute. Where's the bathroom?

Down that hall.

You better go back. Why? One of the
snakes got away.

I hate snakes.

To what?

Finally.

Did you bring the rest of the papers?

Yeah, the sooner we get this thing out
of the way, the better.

You can use my pen.

Oh, I said, who's got time for that?

Oh, I like it. Very nice.

Yes.

Yes, it's very nice.

Hotel security, you're busted.

Well, I was just sitting here, minding
my own business, and this woman came

my room. Happens all the time, so you
just relax. Everything's under control.

What about my money?

Evidence. You be quiet. And you.

You keep your nose clean from now on,
you hear me? I will.

I will.

Come on.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

What's the story here? Don't tell me
you're hotel security.

Don't worry about who I am.

You want to make this 200 the easy way
or what?

Yeah, I'm listening.

All right, come with me.

What are we going to do?

But, Rita, I can get around, but I
really love doctors.

And I love that they have this knowledge
and all this education.

And if I am ever in any kind of trouble,
I want a doctor near.

So I moved next to a golf course.

Don't laugh.

The other day I keeled over and I asked
for a doctor. Two of them came over.

One of them says, I think you fainted. I
said, I'd like a second opinion.

The other doc says, I think your
backswing's too short.

I think it's great.

He always was.

I've heard a rumor that Community
General's own Dr.

Sloan has been known to cut loose with
some fancy footwork.

Maybe with a little encouragement.

What do you say, Doc?

Ladies and gentlemen, for Community
General Hospital's emergency room, Dr.

Mark Sloan.

Surprise came to this telethon that way
buddy treated you, but he treated

everyone exactly the same rotten You had
an extra reason to kill him

when your wife fell ill and you asked
buddy for money Senator, Florida he

you down How'd you know that?

Michael told me He

didn't even come to the funeral

Good thing I'd have killed him. Maybe
you didn't have an opportunity until

telethon. I didn't kill him, Doc.

Maybe you wouldn't mind telling me where
you were when Buddy was murdered.

Across the street, getting quietly
smacked.

Ask the bartender.

I will.

This is the Blake suite.

No, no, no, no. She can't come to the
phone now. She's in the shower.

She's in the shower.

All right. Get him out of the room.

Oh, yes. Hello. I'm sorry to keep you
waiting, sir.

This is Mrs.

Steiner, the assistant hotel manager.

And I'm afraid there's been a mix -up in
Mrs. Blake's account.

We need verification of her credit card
number.

I'm her associate. Can't this wait?

Oh, no, sir.

I'm afraid not. Unless this matter is
cleared up immediately, another party

be checking into the room.

I'll be right there.

He'll be right down.

Good girl.

Hey.

Oh.

Here you go.

Oh, watch where you're going. Sorry,
pal.

I forgot your mints. Hey, come back
here.

$69 ,405.

Now, there's only seven hours to go, so
let's keep those pledges coming.

I have a terrible feeling we'll never
raise the $100 ,000.

17 hours.

Has anybody ever talked for 17 hours?
See, Mr. Wainwright will never take me

seriously again, never.

Tell Monty and Farrah I can't learn
their jokes. My eyes won't open.

17 hours into this telethon, we've only
raised two -thirds of the money. Two

-thirds. You know, maybe just a little.

Oh, no, no. No, Sloan Jr. No, no. Stay
up. Stay up.

Sloan, you have to help me out. I
guarantee the board will raise the

guarantee the board, Sloan. I guarantee
them. Calm down.

It isn't over yet.

How are you?

Oh, great.

Like I'm swimming through jail. Here.

Finish.

Where are Monty and Sarah?

They're in their dressing room
rehearsing their old act.

All right.

Okay, let's go. Let's go.

Back to the stage.

Right this way. Let's bring this home.
Where am I? Right here.

Stage, right this way.

When I first met Sarah, I asked if I
could see her home, so she gave me a

picture. When we first got married, it
was great.

Then, as we were walking back down the
aisle... I said to Sarah, what would you

like for a wedding gift? And she said,
separate honeymoons.

I always say, love is mind over matter.

That's right. She doesn't mind, and I
don't matter.

Oh, hiya, Doc Sloan. Hey, don't stop. I
love the routine.

So do the troops at Valley Forge.

We're not that old, darling.

It was Gettysburg.

Is there something we can do for you?

I wanted to ask you a couple of
questions.

Oh, do we win a prize?

No, but maybe we find out who killed
Buddy.

Michael killed Buddy.

Poor kid.

You know, I don't think so, really. Not
Michael.

But somebody who hated him did.

And you two both had good reason to hate
Buddy Blake.

Mr. Warmth, Mr. Personality.

I mean the Buddy Blake who ruined your
marriage.

Let's take a break, Monty.

You're right. I did have an affair with
Buddy.

Years ago when we were working with him.

It didn't last long.

None of Buddy's affairs ever did.

It was the biggest mistake I ever made
in my life.

Well, Sarah, from what I hear, you took
that affair pretty seriously.

And when Buddy broke it off so abruptly,
you were very upset.

I thought he loved me because he called
me honey.

Turned out he couldn't remember my name.

Monty, is it true at that time you
threatened to kill him?

Sure, but I didn't have to. He was dying
every Wednesday night in front of 30

million people on television.

But you took the breakup of your
marriage pretty hard, didn't you?

Oh, wouldn't you?

About half to six weeks in a rubber
room.

No, no, I got over it, Doc.

And here we are again, for the first
time.

That's great. I'm happy for both of you.

Oh, one last thing.

When Buddy was murdered, where were the
both of you?

Is it the trick question?

No, not really. I just wondered where
you were.

Together.

I've been in the same room at the same
time.

Oh.

Well, I mean...

You had finished writing Buddy's
material, and nobody saw you backstage,

was just wondering what you were doing.

Making whoopee!

Oh.

Sorry.

Congratulations to the both of you.

Jack, where have you been?

I think I know who killed Buddy Blake.

I got the proof right here.

Well, one more hour to go.

One more hour.

Let's go check the tote board, shall we?

Oh.

Isn't that nice?

Let's put it over the top, shall we? For
the emergency room.

I love the emergency room.

They have beds there.

Nice.

Soft.

Warm beds.

Blankets.

Pillows.

Our next guest is Carlotta, who is going
to yodel for us.

What do you know?

After all Buddy's insults, he gave Marcy
power of attorney.

She didn't waste any time transferring
his money into her bank, or changing the

ownership on the rest of their home. Now
look at these.

The changes are dated last week.

Add that to Mr. Loverboy, and you get...
Survival.

Now, I don't know who you two think you
are, but I've got a good mind to call a

cop. Well, you know, then you'd have to
explain how all of Buddy's bank accounts

very suddenly became yours, and as
lately as last week.

Maybe I can explain, if you'll allow me.

I'm Herb Morton, Buddy's business
manager.

Man, that's not all you manage, pal.

It's true.

Marcy and I love one another, which is
why I couldn't stand by and watch what

Buddy was doing to her.

So what? You killed him.

Hardly. Look, everybody knows Buddy was
a horrible person.

But what you probably don't know is that
he was also... He was also a two

-timing philanderer and gambler.

It's true.

Every month I'd see large sums of money
paid out to one young woman or another

to cover his markers in Las Vegas.

I was... That is, we were merely
protecting what was left.

All I'm hearing is a stronger motive for
murder.

Unless you can tell us where you were
around the time Buddy was killed.

I was backstage on the phone with Herb.

Actually, we were on a conference call
with an associate at my office.

We were talking about the information in
those faxes.

The call was timed and dated.

If you'd care to check.

Any other questions?

Doc? Uh, no, I don't think so.

Unless you want to make a contribution
to the telephone.

I'll excuse us.

Guess not.

I'm sorry, Mark. I... I thought we had
to kill her.

That's okay. So did I.

So what does that mean?

Marcy's got an alibi.

Hank was across the street at the bar
having a drink, which I checked.

And Sarah and Monty were together.

Who's the leader?

Leader you know who?

Michael.

You know, not necessarily, though,
because Monty and Sarah only have each

as alibis.

Joe, can you play the tape from just a
few minutes before Buddy comes out

Look, I'm not quite sure what we're
looking for here.

Okay, hold it right there.

Now, there's Monty sitting at the
celebrity phone bank. Clock says 12 .15.

go ahead.

All right, stop.

Now, look.

Monty's gone, and the clock reads 12
.18.

Can you fast -forward now to when he
comes back?

All right, now Monty's back at the phone
bank, and the clock says 12 .30.

So where'd he go for the 12 minutes?

I don't know.

Wait a minute, didn't you tell me that
Sarah said Monty was with her backstage?

Maybe.

Joe, could we see this from a different
angle, right from the top?

Okay, freeze it right there.

Can you enlarge that any?

Yeah, see?

Now there's Sarah and the clock.

What does that say?

12, 12 .18.

Okay, okay, keep going, Joe.

12 .30.

Sarah's still there. No sign of Monty.

So she lied about Monty being with her.

But come on, Mark. It doesn't mean that
that Monty murdered Buddy.

Joe, can I see that angle of Monty
again?

Can you enlarge that any? I can't.

Yeah.

All right. Now, on the same screen, can
you show me this picture of Monty from

before?

There.

Oh, this is very interesting.

Now I think we have something.

Steve.

Steve. Hey.

You all right?

What's going on?

Plasma with cream and sugar.

It's only going to take a minute.

I thought you'd like to be here when I
expose Buddy Blake's killer.

Well, this better be good, Doc.

I've been up for about 36 hours. I'm
beat.

It's not going to take long. I just have
a tape I want you to see here.

Oh, and Sarah, I want to tell you I know
that you lied about being backstage

with Monty.

You never left the set.

We have it on tape.

So? This is ridiculous.

Come on, Sarah. No, wait a minute.

That's not what I want to show you.

You know, in reviewing these tapes,
there's one thing that caught my

and that was your hair, Monty.

And that's how I know you're the one
that killed Buddy Blake.

What is this, a joke? What's the
punchline? Take a look here. We edited

tapes.

Now, if you look closely, at the
beginning of the telethon, Monty's hair

rather short.

Now, after Buddy was killed, you notice
Monty's hair hangs over his ears.

Now, I had to ask myself the question,
how much hair can a person grow in 30

minutes?

All right, you got me. How much?

The answer is it wasn't your hair.

When you and Buddy struggled in the
dressing room and you stabbed him, your

toupee must have fallen off. And in your
rush to get out of there, you grabbed

Buddy's by mistake, which is longer than
yours.

That's crazy.

My toupee fits perfectly.

Well, of course it does, because you
have a spare toupee.

Because as soon as you could, you took
off Buddy's toupee and put on your own.

This one.

You can't prove any of this.

When Buddy staggered on stage, I thought
he was coming toward me.

But actually, he was going toward you,
clutching this hairpiece, your toupee.

This is the hairpiece that Buddy was
carrying on stage.

Your toupee.

And it has...

The same code number assigned by the wig
maker to identify a specific client, in

this case, you.

Monty, I'm so sorry.

You were afraid he did it, weren't you?

That's why you lied for him.

He was such a mean, cruel creep. I hated
him for what he took from me.

My career, my dignity.

Most of all because of you.

He never had me, Monty.

He had a simple, naive girl who came to
her senses too late and has regretted it

ever since.

Sure look like you.

Let's go, Monty.

What? I'm placing you under arrest.

I'm being arrested by an emcee? What is
this, Hollywood?

Steve is a detective with the police
force, Monty.

Come on.

Monty?

This time I'm going to stick around.

And after college, I got a job working
for a textile manufacturer.

Cotton does your body good. Just don't
ask the sheep.

Well,

I don't know where everybody is.

But we have ten minutes to go, and we
haven't reached our goal yet.

So then I... Hello, Steve. Somebody help
me.

And just get happy.

You better chase all your cares away.

Sing hallelujah.

Come on, get happy.

Get ready for the happy day.

The fun is starting. Come on.

The Lord is waiting to take your hand.

Sound hallelujah.

Come on, get happy.

We're going to the promised land.

We're heading across the river. Wash the
sins away in the tide. And it's

oh so peaceful on the other side.

We're heading.

I don't have school today.

Thank you, son.

We did it, Sloan. You had a phone call
from Jerry Lewis.

Take a message.

Viagra.