All language subtitles for i_love_lucy_s04e21_the_hedda_hopper_story

Operator, are you sure you're calling
the right number in New York City?

Muriel 5 -9 -0 -9 -9.

Well, I don't understand it. They should
answer.

What's the matter, dear?

Look,

Ricky, I lied to you before we were
married. I really don't understand

Now, what's the matter with Hedda
Hooper?

We've been here five whole weeks, and
she hasn't had my name in the paper

And neither has Roelia Parsons.

All they talk about is Marilyn Monroe,
Marilyn Monroe, Marilyn Monroe.

What has Marilyn Monroe got that I
haven't got?

Well, I'm sorry, dear, but you'll get
your own publicity in due time. Yeah,

well, I'm going to get my own publicity,
that's what I'm going to do. That's a

good idea. Yes?

Oh, well, thank you very much, operator.

They don't answer. I wonder where Mother
and Little Ricky are. I've been calling

the apartment all morning.

Well, maybe they went to the park.

Well, they wouldn't stay in the park
this long.

You don't think something could have
happened?

Well, I don't know.

Your mother in the park with all those
squirrels running around.

Hey, maybe they're on their way out
here. In her last letter, she said they

getting ready.

Well, don't you think she would have let
us know?

Well, you know how Mother is.

Yeah.

You take that back.

What? What you were thinking when you
said, yeah.

Mother wouldn't forget to send a wire.

Oh, no?

Let's just hope that she doesn't forget
to bring the baby with her.

Morning.

Hi, come in.

I know one thing. If we don't hear soon,
I'm going to call Mrs. Trumbull. What's

the matter, honey? I've been calling New
York all morning. There's no answer in

the apartment.

Well, maybe your mother took the baby to
the park. I wouldn't stay in the park

for four hours. You're just worrying
because you're so far away. Well, it's

back there now. You know, it's the
middle of winter. You don't stay in the

Oh, hi, Bobby. Hi. Telegram for me?
Well, I don't know whether it's for you

not. We've been trying to figure it out
down at the desk. Now, it's either for

you or we'll have to forward it to
Japan.

What?

This is Mickey Mercado.

This from your mother.

What'd you say?

Arriving 9 .30 with little Ricky, love
mother.

Hey, it's little Ricky and I'm big
Mickey.

Well, at least she sent us a wire, told
us she's arriving at 9 .30.

Hooray for mother.

A .M. or P .M.? She doesn't say.

What day?

She doesn't say.

She doesn't say.

Whatever happened to that woman's brain?

She doesn't say.

Come on, give it to me. Maybe I can
figure it out. They sent the wire last

night, so they must be arriving at 9 .30
this morning. I'll call the airport.

International Airport, please.

Gee, maybe they're waiting for us out
there right now.

Fly information.

Oh, why didn't they deliver that
telegram sooner?

Just be thankful you didn't have to wait
till it came back from Japan marked not

known at this pagoda. Oh.

Hello. Will you please tell me if any of
the airlines have a flight due in at 9

.30 this morning?

Well, how about 9 .30 tonight?

No, huh?

Well, thank you very much. Wait a
minute. Maybe there's a flight number 9

Hold it.

Okay. Any of the airlines have a
flight... number 930?

Yes?

What time is it doing?

1 .55.

Good.

From Bombay?

Bombay? Well, with your mother, no.

Even she wouldn't go from New York to
Los Angeles by way of India.

Thank you very much.

Don't say it. You're right, but don't
say it.

just have to stay here and wait for her
to find us. Oh, honey, she might never

find us.

Yeah.

She's got the baby with her.

I'll get it, honey. Thanks.

Hello?

This is Lucy.

Oh, it's Mother. Mother!

but we didn't understand your wire.

Tell her to stay right there and we'll
come and get her. Yeah, Mom, listen. You

stay right where you are and we'll come
and get you.

Now, Mother, please do just as I say.
Stay where you are and we'll come and

you as soon as we can.

Okay, dear. Bye.

Come on, let's all walk to the airport
and get her. Yeah, come on. I don't want

your mother running around loose too
long. Come on, let's go. Here we go.

Well,

I still think we should have waited out
at the airport. I'm sure Mother was out

there somewhere.

But, honey, we were there a whole hour.

Yeah, and we looked every place but in
the windsock.

Oh, Fred.

Don't make jokes. I'm serious. I'm
worried sick.

Well, what are we going to do, Rick?

come out to California?

I just put him down, but he's not
asleep.

Oh, honey, we told you to stay there.
What happened?

Well, I got so terribly bored just
sitting there.

Well, look, Mrs.

McGillicuddy, why didn't you tell where
you were?

I mean, we've been looking all over the
airport.

What for?

For you.

Well, now, Mickey, that wasn't very
bright.

I wasn't at the airport.

Well, where were you when you called?

Down in the lobby.

She didn't ask me.

12 .30. What time is it doing?

12 .30.

Didn't you get my wire?

Well, yeah, we got your wire, but it
said 9 .30.

Well? Well?

Please. Mother, why did you tell us 9
.30 if they told you 12 .30?

Well, I thought everybody knew that
there was three hours difference in time

between here and New York.

Oh, God, Dawson, brother. Now I've heard
everything.

Don't you let him talk like that about
me. Ricky, now, look, Mother's right.

There is three hours difference in time.
Yeah.

Look, Mrs.

McKeeler, I would like to explain
something to you.

In the first place, they meant Pacific
Coast time.

And in the second place, if you wanted
to allow for the time, you should have

added three hours.

You did the whole thing backwards.

You should have said arriving at 3 .30.
Oh, poo.

Now, look, I'm just trying to explain to
you what you should have said. I can't

hear a word you're saying.

You see, it's only quarter past three.

So, according to you, I'm not even here
yet. Huh?

Now, how do you like that? I'm only
trying to get it straight, and all I get

poo and hot.

Now, just a minute, Ricky. I think she's
right about the time. Ethel, Ricky.

Please, don't. I'm telling you, you've
got to wind it when you go. You've got

take it off when you come. You listen to
me. Look, Ethel, the sun opens. It

opens in the east and it closes in the
west.

There's the round derby right there,
see? And right over in there is the

Hollywood Bowl.

Oh, isn't this exciting?

And, Mother, this afternoon we're going
to take you all around and you will just

be amazed. Every time you walk down the
street, you see movie stars walking

right along.

Really? Oh, I hope I see some of my
favorites.

Have you seen Raymond Navarro or Francis
X. Bushman?

Well, no, I don't.

house where Rudolph Valentino lived.

Oh, I'll never forget him in the chic.

I'm the chic of Africa.

Your love belongs to me.

Well, that's very nice, Mother.

You know, they're grooming Ricky to be
another Rudolph Valentino. Ricky?

Ricky who?

Ricky me, that's all.

I'm sorry, Mother.

Oh, that's all right, Mickey.

Mother,

you haven't told us a thing about your
trip.

Who'd you meet on the plane? Anyone
interesting? Oh, yes, I met some lovely

people. The lady next to me was just as
sweet as she could be.

Her daughter wants to get into the
movies.

I told her to call you to the studio,
Mickey.

Oh, you did, eh?

And the man across the way.

Uh, he owns an amusement park in Red
Bluff, California. And, oh, if we ever

up there, little Ricky can ride the
merry -go -round free.

Oh, well, that's nice.

And the woman behind me was, uh, oh,
some kind of a newspaper woman.

Uh, she said she might like to do a
story on you.

I invited her over to tea tomorrow
afternoon.

Now, look, Mrs.

McGillicuddy, I... Mother, if you're
going sightseeing, you better get your

on, dear. All right.

I'm the chief called Valerie.

Please, honey, why do you have to get so
mad?

Oh, I'll get it.

Hello.

Oh, come right up, Mr. Pomerantz.

Yes. Who's that?

My new press agent.

Well, honey, do you have to see him now?

Yeah, honey, this is business. I got to
see him now. You go take your mother

out. Okay, I'm ready.

Oh, mother, you go over and pick up the
baby at the Mercer's. I'll be with you

in about five minutes.

Oh, all right, dear.

Goodbye, Mickey.

Goodbye, mother.

Call me Charlie, Dad.

Okay, Charlie.

Now then, you're looking for someone to
give you a real good publicity build

-up, right?

Well, I need something, boy. I don't
seem to get a thing in the motion

columnist.

Is that accent real?

What accent?

Good, good.

Let me take a look at you.

Eh, handsome, good build. Hey, you know,
Ricky, with your looks and talent, I

know how we're going places.

We are?

Dad? I'm going to make you the Cuban
Liberace.

Well, I don't know about that, but I'd
like to see my name in a few of the

columns. Now, let's see. You're doing
the lead and Don Juan in the studio

to make you the great lover type, huh?
Well, I guess that's right. Yeah, well,

that's always a good angle. We'll start
out by linking your name with Glamour

Girls. You'll be seen at restaurants and
nightclubs, holding hands, dancing

cheek to cheek. Hold it.

I am married.

Married? Yeah.

Why'd you go and do that for?

Well, I'm sorry, but I've been happily
married for 14 years.

Say, that might be an angle in itself.

Now, who'd believe it?

Well, we've got to find something for
you, Rick.

Something good.

Well, Charlie, you're the publicity
agent. You're supposed to dream it up.

Hey, wait a minute.

a minute. That pool gives me an idea.
Can you swim?

No. Just a minute. I'm going to die off
that balcony.

This is the third floor.

Oh, no, no, no. Listen, this is the bit.

Tomorrow afternoon, the Motion Picture
Mothers Club is having their annual tea

here at the hotel.

Now, Hedda Hopper always covers it.
She's always here.

Well? Now, look, they're having it on
the terrace down by the pool. Now,

I arrange for you to sing at that tea.
Yeah? And suppose one of the guests

accidentally falls into the pool and she
can't swim.

Yeah? And suppose you jump in with your
clothes on and save her life.

Well, you might got something there.

Might got?

It's absolutely inspired. It's the
greatest. You'll be the lead item and

column the very next day.

We'll try it.

Oh, hiya, honey.

Oh, hello. Charlie's my wife. Lucy,
Charlie Pomerantz. Nice to meet you. How

you do, Mr.

Pomerantz? It's very nice to meet you.
I'm sorry I have to pop off like this.

Goodbye, dear. Goodbye, honey.

Now, what we need is a good -looking
young girl who could use some publicity.

Uh -huh.

Yes?

You wanted a young girl that was good
-looking?

Well, I'm... I'm... I want some
publicity.

Oh, no.

No, no, no. You can't save your own
wife. Nobody would ever believe this.

Hey, that might be a wonderful gimmick,
saving your own wife. Might be just

daring enough to make it.

Oh, I don't know, Charlie. Oh, come on,
Rick. Let's give it a try.

Well, I... All right.

God, what do I do?

Oh, it's easy. All you do is fall in the
pool with your clothes on. Well, I

think I can... What?

But Ricky is going to be singing at the
tea. He'll jump in and save you.

He will?

Well, all right.

I'd like to do that.

Besides, I told all my friends in New
York I was going to make a big...

in Hollywood.

Oh, my, you look lovely, dear. Thank
you, Mother.

You didn't have to get that dressed up
just for my company.

What? My company dear, that nice lady I
met on the plane, you know, I told you I

invited her to tea this afternoon.

Oh, Mother, I'm sorry, but Ricky and I
can't be here this afternoon.

Well, well, this is a pretty kettle of
fish, and I was only doing it for

Mickey's sake.

Oh, well, I'm sorry, Mother, but Ricky
made plans to sing at a tea down by the

pool this afternoon, and I'm going to...
Well, I have to be with him. I told you

yesterday I'd invited her.

Oh, dear.

Oh, come on, honey.

We got to get downstairs.

If it isn't Mr. Ingrid.

I wish that just once your mother would
get my name right.

Mother, mother, couldn't you tell the
lady that we're busy and that we'll see

her another day?

I certainly could not.

What's the problem now?

Oh, well, the lady the mother met on the
plane is coming to tea this afternoon

and mother's upset because we're not
going to be here.

And I only invited her to meet you,
Mickey.

She's in the newspaper business.

What does she do, sell them?

Now, look, Mother, we appreciate your
trying to help. Really, we do, but

just nothing we can do about this today.

Oh, horse feathers.

Oh, dear.

I'm afraid we hurt her feelings.

Well, honey, I'm sorry. We can do...
Nothing we can do about it. Come on,

go.

Yes, sir, I'm Cuban Pete.

I'm the grace of my native street. When
I start to dance, every single...

The cheeky boom cheek causes the dance
of Latin romance.

And Cuban feet doesn't teach you in a
hurry like Castle Mary.

I come from Havana, and there's always
mañana.

So señorita, please, take it easy. Do it
with ease, and you'll love it when

you...

She'll be here. Now, relax.

You know, Charlie, I'm not sure I'll
recognize Hedda. I've never seen her in

person. You can't mess with her. You
just look for the craziest hat you ever

and Hedda will be underneath it. I've
heard that about her.

Are you sure she's coming?

Oh, now, keep cool, Dad. Just trust old
Charlie.

She'll be here. Maybe you better play
another number, all right? Play the one

like, doll. Yes.

Hey. What? Hey, there she is. There's
Hedda.

There. Go, go, go.

Go, go, go ahead. Go, go, go, go, go,
go.

Oh, no, wait!

Be careful.

Yes, sir.

Thank you. Better stay away from the
edge.

Yeah, I will.

I'm sorry, honey. I thought it was him.
It sure looked like her hat.

Well, that's all right, but what are we
going to do about him?

If I jump in, he'll save me before I hit
the water.

I'll take care of him.

me, I thought you were Burt Lancaster.

Well, I've seen you someplace. You are
in the movies, aren't you? No, but I'd

sure like to be. Well, a guy with your
build and looks shouldn't have any

trouble. Hey, you know, you're just
great for the lead in Esther Williams'

picture. I am?

Yeah. Hey, you don't have to have a
picture of yourself handy, do you? Yeah,

got some right in my locker. I kind of
figured you would have.

Why don't you go get me one of those
pictures and I'll show it to some

I know out at Metro, huh? Hey, thanks.
Yeah, pick out a good one.

Okay. Take your time.

You know, sometimes my brain amazes even
me.

You sure got rid of him.

I do.

Listen, are you sure she's coming?

Now, will you please not worry about it,
Rick? I said she'd be here. She'll be

here. Trust Charlie, will you? She'll be
here. She'll be here.

Telephone from Mr. Ricardo.

Telephone from Mr. Ricardo. Here, Bobby.

Oh, come and take it in the lobby, sir.
Hurry it up, Rick.

You know, I just can't understand it.
Hedda has made this function every year

for the last ten years. I know she's
going to be... Well, she'll be here,

Charlie. Wait a minute, wait a minute.

There she is. There's her hat.

That's a hat?

I know it's her favorite. I can't miss
it anyway. Now, go ahead. Go ahead. Do

your stuff. But Ricky isn't here. Oh, go
get him. Now, don't you worry about a

thing. Come on. But Charlie, Ricky isn't
here. He'll be here in time. Now, you

just go, go, go, go, go, go, go on.
Hedda!

It wasn't that after all. What? What?

It was just an old potted plant.

What?

but it turned out to be all wet.

Oh, dear.

Well, anyway, you're in time to meet my
company.

She's in seeing little Ricky.

What an adorable child.

He's almost cuter than my granddaughter.

Oh, thank you, dear.

Uh, Lucy?

my good friend, Heather Hopper. How do
you... Your mother's told

me so much about you two.

You know, I do wish I could stay and
chat, but I was due at a party

an hour ago.

Uh, is it raining outside?

No?

And they say I wear crazy hats.

Thank you for everything, Mrs.
McGillicuddy. Goodbye, Heather.

And it's nice meeting you.

Mrs. McGillicuddy was played by
Catherine Carr. Charlie Pomerantz was

High Everback.

The bellboy was Bobby Jellison. The
lifeguard was John Hart. And Miss Hedda

Hopper played herself.

I Love Lucy is a Desi Lou production.

Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz will be back
next week at the same time.

Hi. We came back to tell you something.
Something that's important to all of us.

It's about the Olympic Games.

They're going to be held next year in
Melbourne, Australia.

And our team must be there to win.

It's up to us. To every American who
wants to see the stars and stripes

above the victor's stands.

to see that funds are available.

You see, the teams behind the iron and
bamboo curtains are government

subsidized. But our team is really our
team, yours and mine.

It's only going to be there if we prove
that we want it there with our

contributions.

You want to know something?

The Pan American Games in Mexico City
are on right now.

And because we didn't raise enough
money, we couldn't send the soccer team.

Honey, not sucker, soccer.

All right, all right.

But our team isn't there.

And we can't let this happen in the
Olympics.

Let's show our Olympic team how we feel
about them and show the world how we

feel about our country.

Send your contributions to U .S. Olympic
Fund, care of your local postmaster.

That's U .S. Olympic Fund, care of your
local postmaster.