All language subtitles for i_love_lucy_s01e20_the_young_fans

Good morning, honey. Good morning. What
are you doing up at the crack of dawn?

It's only 9 .30.

Well, I'm trying to get out of here
without that little monster from next

following me. Little Peggy Dawson?

Yeah, yeah. I can't get rid of her.

Ever since she found out that I'm Ricky
Ricardo, she's like a spook.

No matter where I go, she's there. She
walks with me to the subway in the

morning, she shows up at rehearsal, and
the way she looks at me.

Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye.

You know how teenage girls are. They get
these fabulous crushes on men for no

reason at all.

Yeah, well, I... What do you mean, for
no reason at all?

Oh, you know what I mean. She thinks the
sun rises and sets in you.

Of course, I don't know where she ever
got the idea that you're the smartest,

the handsomest, the most talented man in
the whole world.

Neither do I.

There are a few other men smarter than
I.

Why, you big ham.

Well, anyway, I can go through this cow
-eye routine for another morning. I got

to get out of here. Oh, now you've got
plenty of time. Nobody in their right

mind would expect you to be up for
another two hours yet.

Well, I guess you're right. Drink
another cup of coffee. I'll get your

All right, honey. Thank you.

Am I going crazy or something?

No.

Peggy. Good morning, Ricky.

Good morning. Did I startle you?

Oh, no, no. I always wash my hands in
the coffee every morning.

My, that's interesting.

Yeah.

You go right ahead and eat your
breakfast.

Don't let me bother you.

Now, look, Peggy, I have something to
say to you. What?

Peggy, you're a very sweet girl, dear.

Oh, you call me dear.

Now I can die happy.

Well, uh, look, look, Peggy. Yes, Ricky,
darling.

I'll be right back.

This is not my day.

Look, Lucy, would you do me a favor,
honey? Oh, you called me, honey.

Oh, now I can die happy.

Now, cut it out, will you? May I have
your autograph, Ricky? Just tattoo it on

my arm.

Now, that's enough of that, honey.

How am I going to get rid of her? Why
don't you disillusion her? How?

Just go in there and be mean and nasty
and unattractive.

I'm not that good an actor.

There must be some way.

Of course.

I know the perfect way for me to
straighten her out. How?

You talk to her.

Me? Yeah.

I gotta go to rehearsal. Goodbye, honey.
But, Ricky, what do I say?

Well, honey, you're so clever. You think
of something. Goodbye. Goodbye, you

coward.

He's gone. Oh, gosh, I have to catch up
with him. Oh, now, Peggy, wait a minute.

But I walk into the subway every
morning. Yeah, well, he's a big boy now.

find it by himself.

Now, sit down, Peggy. I want to have a
little talk with you.

All right.

That's a good idea, really.

I want to have a talk with you, too.

Now, look, Peggy. Mrs. Ricardo, let's be
adult about this.

Are you sure about what you're saying,
Peggy? Do you know it's love and not

infatuation? Oh, yes.

My infatuations only last a little
while. This has been going on for two

weeks.

Two whole weeks.

Well, there's a little thing you
overlooked, Peggy. Ricky is married.

I know.

Doesn't that make it sophisticated?

Well, yes.

And he's so much more worldly than the
boys I know.

Well, I should hope so. He's a little
older, too.

I'm...

What?

He must be pushing 23.

Yeah, he's pushing 23 all right. In
fact, he's pushed it all the way to 35.

I suppose you think that I'm pushing 23
too?

Oh, no.

A woman can always tell another woman's
age.

Yes, well, now about Ricky.

You know... Oh, there's another thing
you overlooked, Peggy. What? I love him,

too. I was afraid of that.

You're going to be terrific competition.

Well, thanks.

Gosh, you've got that certain something.

Well, that's quite a compliment.

But how would a girl your age know that
I have that certain something?

I can tell by the way my mother looks at
my father when my father looks at you.

Ricky can take me to the school dance.

Well, now, look, Peggy, I want to have a
talk with you, not as a rival, but as

a... a... A mother?

No, a friend.

Now, what about boys your own age?

Oh, they're all so icky.

They're icky, huh? Yeah.

Except Arthur.

Arthur? Arthur Morton. He's wonderful.

He's got curly hair, big sad eyes, and
floppy ears.

He looks like Gregory Peck.

Sounds more like Lassie.

But if you like Arthur so much, why
don't you go to the school dance with

Oh, he's too shy to ask me.

Well, why don't you ask him?

He doesn't know how to dance.

Oh. Well, how about this? Now, suppose
someone taught him to dance by Saturday.

Would you ask him to take you?

Oh, sure.

Okay. I'll teach him.

I think I can recall a few variations on
the turkey trot.

Now, look, you tell Arthur to come here
right after school and have his first

lesson. Okay.

Oh, gosh, I'm going to be late. Oh, Mrs.
Ricardo.

Yes? Don't say anything about Arthur.

I don't want Ricky to know that I'm
untrue.

Well, your secret is safe, Peggy.

Gee, you're keen.

Bye.

Yes, ma 'am.

Won't you sit down?

Can I get you a drink of water?

Arthur, say something.

I think I'm going to faint.

Now, nonsense.

There's nothing to be shy about. I'm
just going to teach you how to dance,

that's all.

Well, look, we'll start this way.

Now, you just watch my feet.

Now.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four. That's all there
is to it.

Oh, is that all? Yeah, now you try it.

Now.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two. Arthur, Arthur.

Take shorter steps. You'll be dancing
with a girl, not an antelope.

Oh, now try it again.

Now.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, sidestep.

That's right, sidestep.

That's it.

That's it.

Gee, is this all there is to dancing?
Yes.

This is easy.

Yeah, I knew you'd catch on.

There, now, let's try it together. Oh,

now, come on, Arthur.

What are you going to do to me?

I'm not going to do anything to you.
We're just going to dance together.

You mean just the two of us?

Yes, that's the usual number.

Mrs. Ricardo, I can't dance with you.

You're a woman.

Yeah, my husband likes me that way.

Well, I don't know.

A woman.

Now, look, Arthur.

Some people are men and some people are
women. They're made that way so they can

dance together.

dancing the minuet. Put your arms around
me.

Oh, I couldn't.

Now, don't be silly. Now, come on.

Now, just follow me. Now, come on.

Now. One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

on your feet. Light on my feet. Yeah.

Now, follow me.

One, two, three, four. One, two, three,
four.

I'm sorry.

Oh, that's all right.

Okay.

Now, come on. Let's try it again.

Light on my feet. Yeah. Now, try it
again.

Now, one, two, three, four. One, two,
three, four. One. Oh!

Oh!

I'm sorry. I did it again.

You don't think this last time broke it?
No, the first time broke it.

Well, I'll try to be more careful.

Okay. Now, come on.

Light on my feet. Yeah. Light on your
feet.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four. One, two, three,
four.

That's right. Now you're getting it.
There.

That's fine.

Now we'll try it with the music.

I could.

But Arthur.

Mrs. Ricardo.

What? I love you.

What do you mean you love me? I love
you. I love you. Arthur, relax now.

Now calm down.

Now relax.

Gosh, this is the first time I've ever
had my arms around a woman. Now I know

what all the fellas are talking about.

Now, Arthur, there's a big
misunderstanding. You better go now.

No, I'm never going away from you, ever.

Now, Arthur... Let's dance some more.
No, no. You dance by yourself.

Oh, no.

Come on, now. Let's see how much you've
learned, and then maybe I'll dance with

you.

Now, go on. Well, all right. Now, why...

What are you talking about?

Well, after you left this morning, I had
that little chat with Peggy.

Yeah? And she said that she liked a boy
named Arthur Morton, but that he didn't

know how to dance.

Yeah? So I had Arthur come over here,
and I gave him a dancing lesson to get

Peggy off your neck.

What are you whispering about?

If my feet ever find out that it was my
idea, they'll kill me.

Well, I knew you'd figure a simple way
to clear the... entire situation.

Simple. I may never walk again.

Well, listen, honey, thank you very
much. Can I forget about Peggy now? I

so. Hey, you know, this Arthur was so
shy, I practically had to lasso him to

him in here.

No kidding?

Yeah. It was really unbelievable.

And then after we'd been dancing for a
couple of minutes, he suddenly looked me

in the eye and said, I love you.

Oh, no. Yeah.

That's very funny.

In love with you.

Sister. But his being in love with me
isn't that funny. You fell in love with

once, you know.

I sure did, sweetheart.

Hello?

Oh, hello, Peggy.

Oh, Peggy, I don't know what you're...
Well, Peggy, I didn't mean to... Oh,

well, now, dear, you're jumping to
conclu... But Peggy, I... Hello, Peggy?

coming over.

What for?

She says now that I've taken Arthur away
from her, she ought to get you.

Why didn't you tell her not to come
over? I couldn't get a word in edgewise.

No, no, no, I'll get her this time.

Now listen here, Peggy.

Oh, hello, Arthur.

Yeah, I know Arthur.

Well, now look, after all... Now look,
Arthur, you can't...

is coming over, too.

Oh, no.

Yeah? He said he wants to have a man -to
-man talk with me about you.

Oh, swell. Here we are in the middle of
a four -sided triangle.

And it's all your fault. It never would
have happened if you hadn't learned to

play that lousy conga drum.

Never mind that. We got to figure a way
to discourage them.

Well, pointing out that we're too old
for them won't work. I tried that with

Peggy and didn't make the slightest
impression.

Well, maybe you didn't make us old
enough.

Hey, you know, maybe you got something
there, Grandpa.

Yeah. That's what I mean, Grandma.

Yeah. Hey, come on. We got a lot of
aging to do. Okay.

Oh. How is this? That's pretty good, but
you can't talk with such a young voice.

Oh. Is this any better?

Yeah, that's better, but don't tell me a
man your age still has teeth.

Is this all right, Grandma?

Oh, no.

I used to think I'd enjoy growing old
with you, but after this preview, you

better grow old alone.

Never mind that.

Listen, how about you? You don't look
very old. Oh, don't worry about me. I

a few plans.

I may express my teeth, too.

done to me.

I'm disappointed in you.

Oh, well, girly, I'm so sorry. Sit down.
We'll have a little talk.

What? Oh, pardon me. Oh, dear. I always
forget those things.

he is either. Oh, don't try to scare me,
Mrs. Ricardo.

I've seen him when he comes in for
breakfast.

Oh, well, he's all put together by then.

Put together?

Oh, yeah, you should see him when he
wakes up in the morning. He's scattered

over the place.

Yeah, well, you see, us show people know
a lot of makeup tricks. We can look

young whenever we want to.

your way. I'll turn him over to you.
I'll go get him.

Back at home!

Mr. Ricardo, let's be adult about this.
I...

Who of you?

Ricardo doesn't look so old.

She's kind of well -preserved.

At least her hair isn't white.

Oh, Johnny, do you like my hair?

Yeah.

I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.