All language subtitles for Poker.Face.2023.S02E12.1080p.HEVC.X265-MeGusta_[eng]

♪ In-a-gadda-da-vida, honey ♪

I'm telling you, this isn't it.

It's probably, like,
two roads and three houses.

We need to turn on the phone.

Dude, I'm telling you,
we turn that phone on,

nothing good is happening.

Okay, well,
then I don't know, we...

Alright, would you
just calm down?

Turn it on
but just for a second.

Thank you.

I'm not going to say
I told you so.

- It's ringing.
- Yeah, fucking waste of time.

She's not going
to pick up the phone.

- Don't be like that.
- Yeah. Okay.

Charlie, don't hang up.
You were right.

The hitman at the wedding
isn't just another mob heavy.

Hasp's son was killed
by the Iguana.

Keep her talking.
This will take a minute.

A-a-alright. One, hello.

Two, killed by a what?

N-not a what, a who.

The Iguana was killed
by The Iguana.

Look, I-I-I don't want it, Luca,

but you're going to have
to explain it to me.

The Iguana is
the code name for
the world's greatest assassin.

This guy's wanted
by every government
in the Western hemisphere.

He's a suspect in more
than 50 assassinations.

And you, Charlie Cale,
are now the cornerstone

of his plan
to kill Beatrix Hasp.

It's why the he framed
your friend,

it's why the pair
of you got away,
the Iguana wanted you to.

This whole thing is a setup.

Look, I-I-I'm sorry,

but there's just,
uh, there's no way

that he could know
I'm headed to Beatrix's.

But you are, aren't you?

So he did.
The Iguana knows you
are the only person

who can lead him to Hasp.

Cover your ears.

Cover your ears!

Both of them.
Thank you.

Look, they're going
to kill Alex, okay.

I mean, if not the mob,
then this Iguana dude,

and if not him, some other mob.

So, like, o-our minutes
are numbered here.

Come in.

You're a smart cookie, Charlie,

but you don't understand
what you're up against.

The Iguana is
a master of disguise.

He can look like anybody.
I'm texting you a video
right now.

What?

Oh, geez.

On the beach
by the wedding venue.

You see what I'm talking about?

Look, dude,
I-I know you're going

for some dramatic reveal here,

but you're going to have
to explain it to me.

It's the Iguana's prosthetics.
It's his disguise.

Huh? You see it?

The top left is his nose,

cheeks across the middle,
lips and chin at the bottom.

How do you not see it?

I'm sorry, but what kind
of a psycho would recognize

a flattened-out, mixed-up face?

I s... I see it.

The Iguana can look
like anyone, okay,

and his disguises are flawless.

Charlie, if you lead
this guy to Hasp,

if she dies,
I cannot protect you.

FBI, CIA, NSA, they will
all come after you.

You will spend the rest
of your life in federal prison.

You know I'm not lying.

Tell me, do you know
where Hasp is?

Almost there.

Shit.

Okay, well, they crossed
over into Indiana.

Okay. Indiana. Great.

- No, not great.
- We can just cross...

There are over 25 possible
safe houses in the state,

if this is even
their final destination.

This doesn't narrow it down
enough to do a sweep.

Oh.

Hey, I'm sorry to hear
about the divorce.

Jim told me what
you're going through.

What I really don't
want to do is talk

about my personal life
with Agent Luca fucking Clark.

Okay.

Ah, man.

Yeah.

I mean,
Luca's right. Yeah.

Ah, this...

this could be a setup.

Yeah.

I mean, if this Iguana guy
is following us.

Could be a setup,
but we don't know.

Alex, look, I want
to protect you, okay?

But if we lead
an international uber-assassin

to Beatrix Hasp's front door
and just, what,

crossing our fingers
hoping it goes okay, I...

It's alright.
Yeah, you're right.
We shouldn't risk it.

There's a truck stop coming up,

and we could get coffee and pie

and come up with a new strategy.

You're a good kid, Alex.

It's going to be alright,
it's going to be okay.

Ugh!
This piece of shit car.

Alright, man.

Now, remember, he's
a master of disguise.

Jesus, any one
of these guys could be him.

- Are you alright?
- Me? No.

Paranoid as fuck right now.

Let's just get our food
and get the fuck out of here.

- Any snack requests?
- I don't know,

maybe some Butterfingers
and, uh,

you know, uh,
whatever looks good.

Actually, no, just water.

Water and, uh...

No, uh, get some
of that freeze-dried taffy

and then Almond Joy
and some of that jerky,

but not the sweet kind,
you know, the good stuff.

Just get whatever
looks good, okay?

Jesus, man.

Fucking lighter.

Smoking again.

This is cute.

Hey.

- Coffee?
- Oh, hi.

Uh, two, please.

And, uh, two cheeseburgers,
uh, garlic fries,

and, uh, a couple of Xanax
if you got some.

I'm kidding.

There's a guy
in the parking lot.

Oh. Uh...

He's got a BOGO deal going.

- Like a two for one?
- Mm-hmm.

Oh.

Very quick on the fries.

Suspicious.

What's this?

"Grand Canyon Canyon."

It's a canyon named
after the Grand Canyon.

It's like this big,
big local attraction.

The lady in the store
said that it's actually

more of a gorge.

A clandestine choice.

So any ideas cooking?

I don't know.
Me and the fries
are working at it.

You can't lead a trained killer
to Hasp's door,

but I can't stop thinking,
I put myself in his shoes,

we are the only ones
that can get him to Hasp.

He's about to make
a move, right?

Force our hand
or going to just grab us

and beat it out of us.

Alright, look,

the way I figure it,
all we have to do

is stay safe
until Hasp testifies.

That's two weeks.

After that, whoever it is
that hired this Mr. Chameleon,

you know, he goes off to jail,
all this becomes a moot point.

Then you and me, well,
we go square this with Beatrix

once she's out of danger.

That's right. That's right.

And you already outran a bunch
of mob guys before, right?

Like, how hard can it be?

Yeah.

Just, uh, eat your fries.

Is that how you got that?

Oh, this? Uh...

Counter.

Cute.

Wait, what am I looking at?

Right hand.

There.

Shit. Okay.

It's the same hand.

It's the exact same position

where the Iguana had a cut.

He's the right height.
He's the right weight.

It's him. I know it.

Shit!

Go, go, go!

Oyster girl!

He's going to kill us!
Police!

- He's trying to hurt
me and my friend!
- What?

Hey! Hey! Oyster girl?

Oh!
Oh, we lost him!

Holy shit!
We lost the Iguana!

Oh, and they were
beating him up!

Oh, yes,
and the cops were there.

As long as the highway
behind us stays clear.

Shit, Alex, Alex, we did it!

Okay, grab the map.

Grab the map, baby. Yes!

We are going to Bea's,
and we are clearing your name!

I asked you here because
I believe the Iguana is

on his way to kill
Beatrix Hasp right now.

I need you each to release
your three code words

so I can locate Hasp

and move her as soon
as possible.

We have to get ahead of this.

We're hearing nothing
on the wires.

Agency sources say
the Iguana retired

more than a year ago.

Not a peep since Alaska.

Agent Clark, you've
presented zero evidence

that the Iguana knows
Hasp's location.

You've offered
a farfetched theory

that the killing
of Hasp's adopted son

is part of some complex plan

- designed by somebody...
- The Iguana.

To reveal where Hasp is.

You argue because
this somebody...

The Iguana.

Believes that
an oyster-shucking drifter

will take him there.

I mean, isn't it more likely
that the Iguana is hoping

that you do exactly
what you're doing?

Asking us to break
a triple blind protection

so you can lead him
there yourself?

I think we can all agree
that the only way to keep

Beatrix Hasp safe

is not to reveal
her location to anyone,

even ourselves.

- Ma'am, you...
- Agent Clark,

the whole reason we split
the three-word code,

identifying Hasp's location
between our agencies,

is so that no one agency,
or agent,

can work out where she is.

It's the only way
to keep this witness safe.

And we must keep
this witness safe,
Agent Clark.

But I'm saying I believe
the location has already

been compromised.

- By this girl?
- Yes.

You have to understand,

Charlie Cale has
an uncanny talent

for figuring out things
that nobody else can.

She's a force of nature,
crime-solving genius.

She has the detail detection
of a hawk,

the logical meticulousness
of Sherlock Holmes,

and the stubborn persistence
of an English bulldog
at lunchtime.

She can out-crack the NSA,
outsmart the CIA,

and she could frankly run
the FBI better than anyone

in this room, including me.

So underestimate her
at your peril.

I think we're done here.

Here we go. Here we go.

So I'm going
to go in first, alright?

Uh, give her
a little primer, you know,

before we put you
in the firing squad.

Okay.

Oh, fuck.

I got a bad feeling.

Jesus.

Why am I so nervous?

You got any gum in there?

♪ Give that breath
long-lasting freshness ♪

♪ With Big Red ♪

Alright, listen to me, uh...

anything goes wrong,
anything feels weird,

just slam on that horn, okay?

Alright.

I'll be back in a second.

Thank you.

I got you.

Oh.

Shit. Alex!

Shit, shit, shit!
Shit, shit, shit!

Shit! Hey!

Oh.

Shit.

Oh, shit.

Shit.

Jesus Christ!

Shit.

Oh, geez.

Shit, shit, shit!

Oh, shit. Fuck.

You have only
10 seconds to do this.

There's quite a bit
at stake here.

- Good luck.
- "Back porch."

You got it!

Yeah, I did!

Adrian, memories
and money go together.

$50,000!

- Oh, my God!
- Which means

she has 7,900...

Beatrix. Shit.

$598.

Who needs all the rounds?

Beatrix.

Are you here?

Shit.

Category is "phrase"
and off we go.

Oh, my God. Beatrix?

Tavaris?

"Right in the butt"?

- Jesus.
- Charlie.

No.

Oh, my God, Charlie.

Charlie.

Hey, skink.

Cut the shit.

Come on out.

I know who you are.

I was just fucking with you.

Couldn't resist.

Shouldn't you be dying
of anaphylaxis

caused by a fatal
cinnamon allergy?

I'm severely, like deathly
allergic to cinnamon.

All true.

You know what's funny?

The amount of lies
I've told you,

the amount
of mundane made-up details
I've had to keep track of,

it has been bonkers.

I never expected
I'd get taken down

by a stick of Big Red, though.

Always wondered
if you were out there,

and now I found you.

The one person in the world
who can lie to me.

Technically, I found you.

Okay, so, uh, how do you do it?

Huh? You got, like,
a trick or something?

Like, you only use
certain words,

so technically you're not lying?

No. I've lied to you.

Over and over.

Cool.

So you're the world's
biggest sociopath.

Jesus!

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

Sudden hot flash.
You mind? I'm of an age.

Fucking Christ.
Really, Alex.

And all for this, right?

All to get to Beatrix Hasp.

I mean, Jesus, lady,
wasn't there an easier way?

I mean, I'm doing
the math here, you know.

Um, seems like a lot of work.

You invented
a whole other person.

Like, is there anything that
you didn't lie to me about?

Yes. There was one thing.

I wasn't lying at the wedding,

when we first met.

I really was at an all-time low.

My entire adult life,

I've been deceiving and killing

some of the most
powerful people in the world.

It was always so easy.

I've seduced
and murdered movie stars,

I've killed kings and queens,

dukes, viscounts,
barons, countesses.

When the Vatican wanted
to put out a contract

on the sitting Pope...

they called me.

- You killed a pope?
- No.

Always good to have a line.

Cheap fuckers
wouldn't make my rate.

The last few years though,

a feeling had started
to settle over me.

I was taking out some CEO
in a panic room

300 feet under
the Alaskan tundra.

Nobody knows you're here.

It took months
of research and planning.

Nobody knows you're here.

I traveled there on foot

a hundred miles so that
I could not be detected.

I had to wrestle
a polar bear to the death.

Nobody knows you're here.

And when it was finally done...

I realized what
that feeling was.

I was bored.

It just wasn't
a challenge anymore.

And without that,
I was dead inside.

Two weeks before we met,
I hit an inflection point.

Luckily, at that very moment,

my agent called.

I'm sorry, you have an agent?

Talk about world's
biggest sociopath.

I know you're out
of the game, Iggy,

but hear me out.

I've got the perfect job.

A real noisy comeback.

Beatrix Hasp.

She's about to testify

against the entire
East Coast mob,

and there is a lot of money
on the table to get her gone.

A fucking mob hit?

I told you no more boring jobs.

Wait, listen.

Nobody will take it.

They say it can't be done.

The FBI's got this broad

in some crazy unbreakable
protection program.

She's been invisible since
the day they arrested her.

- I'm hanging up.
- Hold on!

Here it is: there's only
one person left in the world

who has any connection
to Beatrix Hasp,

and get this, honey,

it's impossible to lie to her.

Everyone can be lied to, Cedric.

Not this gal.

Charlie Cale is a bonafide
human lie detector.

Infallible, every time.

Let me send you her file.

I haven't been caught in a lie

since I was 5 years old.

And that was only
because I didn't know

you could kill witnesses.

Well, you actually can't.

When I realized
my kryptonite might exist,

I couldn't wait to meet you.

So I designed a test.

The coffee!

One black coffee,

and what's the most
disgusting beverage

you have here?

Butterscotch pumpkin mochaccino.

It's like drinking a candle.

That's perfect.

Uh, do you want this coffee?

This was the moment.

Could I lie to you?

Uh, it's just
a regular black coffee,

they accidentally made me two.

It required total suppression
of my involuntary responses.

Heart rate, adrenaline,

body temperature,
saliva production,

oxygen concentration.

I even had
to control my sinuses.

Not coffee.

Not controlling
the presentational effects,

but choking off the roots
of my humanity.

They messed it up.

I'm so sorry.

It took everything I had.

And I said it was black coffee,
I lied, that's awful.

It was exhilarating.

It's fine. You're trying
to do something nice.

And-and you didn't lie.

I went home,

hooked up in a hydration IV,

and slept for 26 hours.

I'd never been happier.

Lying to you.

I felt like an Olympic athlete

pushing beyond
what's physically possible.

I'd never struggled before,
not once.

Lying to you was like
great sex...

I assume.

I don't really do
physical pleasure.

Well, that's unfortunate.

And it never got easier.

Every single time I lied to you,

and I lied to you a lot,

it was the same Herculean act.

And even then,
I could tell I was just

barely getting it over the net.

One slight slip-up
in concentration

and you'd detect me.

I see.

But lying to you
was just the start.

To find my way to Hasp,

I had to earn
your complete trust.

That's when I got
my lucky break.

- The murder at the gym.
- The murder at the gym.

Oh, jackpot!

I couldn't have
planned it better.

I became your kooky
little Watson,

and, yeah, you lapped it up.

After that, cracking
the Charlie code was easy.

I'm sorry, uh,
what's the Charlie code?

It's not complicated.

You're a compulsive do-gooder.
Simple as that.

You're a sucker

for the world's victims
and losers.

You know what, I think, uh,

I think I, uh...

I think I just like people.

Do you?

Sure.

All they do is lie
to you, all the time.

You ask me a question and I lie,

who'd you just have
a conversation with?

Nobody.

Charlie, you've been talking
to nobody your whole life.

I saw how much it meant to you.

Not being lied to for once.

You loved it.

Fine. I get it.

Then what?

And then I just had
to get into some hot water

that only Beatrix Hasp
could pull me out of.

Once I uncovered
Hasp's adopted son...

everything fell into place.

First, I hired the world's
second greatest assassin.

Total schnook.

Then I got him to frame me.

Stick with the plan.

Find a patsy to take the fall,

and we'll double your fee
to help compensate

for the added risk.

He was room temperature
butter in my hands.

And that leads us
to this moment here.

I'm so sorry.

What happened at the truck stop?

I had to, uh,
improvise that one.

Hey, want an oyster?

Oyster?

Well, well,

my initial impression
still stands.

I mean, all that for a mob hit.

Like, do you get paid
by the hour or something?

All because of you,
Charlie Cale,

the greatest challenge
of my career.

You gave me a reason to live.

Wow.

Well, here's some
honesty for you.

Even now, here,

hearing you say those words,

it still just sends
a little zing through my heart.

I guess I, I can't suppress

that root of my humanity stuff,

which is...

it's kind of fucked up,

but it's also kind of
a relief in a way, you know?

It means I'll never be you.

I really wish
I didn't have to kill you.

Ah, yeah, shit.

Well, I figured
that might be coming.

But, hey,
won't killing me mean
that you got nobody left

to light your fire?

You just got to go back
to that meaningless thrum

of nihilistic dread.

Probably.

- What did you do?
- Oh, me?

Oh, I, uh... I lit your fire.

Clever girl.

We have a location for Hasp!
Greenville, Indiana.

Contact local PD,

tell them to send
everyone they have
to that address right now.

You want an extraction team
for Hasp?

Nope. Tell them
to bring firepower.

Suspect is armed and dangerous.

Beatrix Hasp is likely dead.

I'm on my way.

Hostage!
She's got a hostage!

Stand down, do not engage.

Ow! Geez!

Federal agents are
en route and will intercept.

- Do not engage.
- Geez.

Ouch! Necessary?

Fuck!

So... what now?

Okay.

I spoke to headquarters.

Okay, we can take out the car!

I'm not putting
our hostage in danger.

There's still time.

Fucking Christ!
We need to act!

Stand by!
The hostage has a plan.

I know how that sounds
but just wait.

Is there a plan?

Maybe cut a deal?

You know,
maybe you could negotiate

down to minimum security?

They're not
catching me, Charlie.

Explain to me how that
interacts with reality.

I've got an order
straight from the top
to take out the car.

We need to buy her more time.

Get me Agent Darville
on the line.

- Agent Darville can't help you.
- Then get me the director!

No, Luca.

The top, top.

You haven't been
paying attention.

I fooled the unfoolable
Charlie Cale.

The closest thing
I'll ever have to a nemesis.

So what's left?

This is the end of the road.

You're wrong.

Okay, you can't lie to me.

See, you've never done it
when I'm trying to catch you.

And I don't think you can.

Jesus!

They just turned
onto a dirt road

towards Grand Canyon Canyon,
she's trying to lose us.

There's no way out of there.

This dirt road dead ends
at the overlook.

- Are you paying attention now?
- Uh-huh.

Two truths and a lie.
Fair fight.

You win, I'll have
an equal in the world.

Sherlock to my Moriarty.

And that'll be fun.

That's reason for us to live.

- And if you win?
- Ready?

When I was a kid,
I had a dog named Puddles.

I'm double-jointed.

I'm going to drive us
off this cliff

no matter who wins this game.

True.

True.

Bullshit.

You win.

Oh! This piece of shit car!

♪ Trailer for sale or rent ♪

♪ Rooms to let, 50 cents ♪

♪ No phone, no pool, no pets ♪

♪ I ain't got no cigarettes ♪

♪ I'm a man of means
by no means ♪

♪ King of the road ♪

This piece of shit car!

Oh, shit!

Oh, fuck!

Fuck!

Oh! Oh, fuck!

Oh, my God!
Fuck! Luca!

Oh, shit! Wait, wait!

Oh, Jesus Christ!

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Oh, shit.

Oh, my God. Oh, shit.

Not bad for two people
under 5'5", huh?

I'm 5'7".

I'll allow it.

Oh, my God.

Oh, fuck!

I'm so sorry,
I'm so sorry about Beatrix,

and you were right.

Catching up real quick here.

Your shuck buddy was the Iguana

and she could lie to you?

Long story short, uh,
she could until she couldn't.

Doesn't matter now.

Agent Clark, any sign
of the suspects?

- Back up.
- Ooh.

Uh, I don't see anyone up here.

Ah, bullshit.

Oh, sorry about that.
Reflex.

Charlie,
it's a stroke of luck
I found you first.

They're sweeping the canyon.

You can get me
out of this, right?
Like, uh...

You know, I mean,
you could just tell them...

I mean, I was trying
to help, right?

You just aided
and abetted a serial killer,

you got
a federal witness killed,

you revealed the location
of a WITSEC safe house.

If I keep listing
the federal crimes

you've committed,
they'll be here.

Okay. Uh...

When you put it that way.

Yeesh.

You're officially wanted
by the FBI.

Makes sense.

Yeah.

Got it.

Two miles south,
there's a service road

that'll take you back
to the highway.

You're lettin' me go?

Luca.

Call it a head start.

Oh, thank you.

Thanks.

This wind.

You look really cold.

No, it's okay, I'll be okay.

There's a service road
two miles south.

Yeah, I got it.

It's cool.

Yeah.

You take this.

Thanks, Luca.

Next time, Charlie...

I will arrest you.

I mean, I have to at this point.

Hey, go now.
Now scurry on.

- Bye.
- Yeah, go.

- Okay.
- Go a little faster, please.

- Okay, I'm running, Luca.
- Yeah.

♪ Take what you need
you think will last ♪

♪ But whatever it is
you think you need ♪

Agent Clark, any sign
of the suspects?

♪ You better grab it fast ♪

That's a negative,
nothing up here.

♪ Yonder stands your
orphan with his gun ♪

Hey, can I get a ride?

Can I get a ride?

Fuck no.
That dog's not with me.

Where'd you come from?

You're fucking up my whole shit.

You're screwing up my ride.

Alright, there you go,
off you go.

Shit.

Jesus Christ.

No. You're going
to get hurt.

Come here.

Jesus, you're shivering.

Hey!

How's it going?

Oh, fuck yes.

Hey, thanks for stopping.

So where are you headed?

Oh, well, I guess
that's a deceptively
profound question.

Well, I'm going to Wichita.

Works for me.

You mind? I found a scamp.

Oh, well, hello.

Uh, I'm Charlie, by the way.

Thanks for the ride.

♪ The vagabond
who's rapping at your door ♪

♪ Is standing in the clothes
that you once wore ♪

♪ Strike another match,
let's go start anew ♪

♪ 'Cause it's all over now,
Baby Blue ♪

♪ It's all over now,
Baby Blue ♪