All language subtitles for Hart to Hart 1994-3 Old Friends Never Die

This is my boss, Jonathan Hart.

He's a millionaire, self -made.

And this is his wife, Jennifer.

She's quite a lady.

Oh, and that's me.

My name is Max.

I take care of them, which ain't easy.

Because when they met, it was murder.

Exactly as you planned.

I believe you're ready, sir.

A costume for Mr.

and Mrs. Hart.

If I can't meet this challenge, I'll
hang up my pincushion.

They're all here, you know.

The greats and the near greats. From
Valentino to Dietrich and Chaplin and

Harlow.

Those were the glory days when Hollywood
costumes meant style and glamour and

panache. Mr. and Mrs. Hart, if you'll
come this way. Now, these are the

costumes I told you about, but I don't
know what that would interest you. See

now, what is the point?

This aisle has some very nice things in
it. We'll just come down here.

Don't give up now. We're just getting
started.

Charles Lawton wore this in Henry VIII.

How about this?

Hedy Lamarr and Samson and Delilah.

Perhaps it would help if I knew what the
theme was.

Oh, I don't think there is a theme.

We're simply going to Alfred Raines'
private island in Hawaii for the weekend

for a costume party. Alfred Raines?

The publisher?

Oh, I am impressed.

You're not one of Mr. Raines' world
-famous authors, are you?

Not exactly, no.

Oh, well.

I suppose we'll find something.

Don't be so modest, darling. You know,
the only reason that we're going to this

affair is because Raines is going to try
to sign it.

I know that and you know that, but does
he have to know that?

Wait. I've got it.

Famous couple.

Romeo and Juliet.

Columbus and Queen Isabella.

Cary Grant and Catherine Hepburn.

Antony and Cleopatra.

On the other hand, there's always
another way to go.

Exactly what I had in mind.

Oh, too bad.

Gee, Ollie, I thought we looked great.

Really?

Well, all right, Stanley, if that's what
you want.

We'll do it.

Herbert, wrap up another Laurel and
Hardy.

The decision's been made.

Really? Come here, Junior. Come on. Yay!

Thanks,

Max.

Hello?

Yeah, hi, Lou.

Well, uh, keep trying, okay?

Yeah.

Right. Thanks a lot, Lou.

We'll be, uh, gone for the next four
days.

Right.

What was that all about?

Remember my telling you that company was
making a run on hard industry stocks?

We still don't know who it is.

Sounds pretty serious.

Mac, do me a favor, will you?

When does it destroy?

Check with some of your buddies on the
street. Maybe one of them will hear

something that's not being said up in
those executive suites.

Right. You've got a plane to catch.

We've got to get home and back.

No way, Squirt.

You and me are staying home.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to
Honolulu, where the local time is 1 .45.

Please remain seated with your seatbelts
fastened until the captain has turned

off the fasteners.

Mr.

and Mrs. Hart, welcome aboard.

Our flying time to Mr. Raines Island
will be about 38 minutes.

If there's anything you need, just let
me know.

Request clearance to Raines Island,
vector south -southeast on a heading of

the island.

There'll be a jeep waiting to take you
and your bags to the main house.

Hope you enjoyed the flight.

We did.

Thanks.

Jonathan, welcome.

I'm Alfred Rain.

Jonathan Hart. Good.

My wife, Jennifer.

Yes, Jennifer. How are you?

I'm so glad the two of you could make
it. Oh, thank you very much. You have a

wonderful place here. Thanks for
inviting us. No, no, no. The thanks is

mine. Signing Jennifer Hart will be a
real feather in my cap. I hope you

understand my intentions are serious.

Well, I hope you understand that I'm
seriously flattered.

Then we're off to a good start.

Now, someone will deliver your bags to
your room, and meanwhile...

This place is yours. Please, make
yourselves at home, will you? All right.

We'll see you later. Fine. Need
anything, please call me.

It looks like Rain built his own little
paradise here.

Well, you know what they say, publish or
perish.

I guess publish won out, huh?

I just kept staring at the board. It
seemed that Spassky had made a major

blunder.

I mean, the move made no sense.

He put his queen in jeopardy very early
on in the game.

If you read my book, you'd see how wrong
I was.

I have the gift with him.

Let's be Shelby Lyons who wrote
Surrender in Black and White.

I suppose this is your way of trying to
express some sort of pack dominance.

No, it's just... Because if you think
that I am impressed with your androgen

-based efforts to maintain some sort of
elite power position, you are sorely

mistaken.

I'm sorry.

You're sorry?

As if that's all that's required to
eradicate 2 ,000 years of male

and domination.

Here's your book.

Who's that?

Nora Kingsley.

Nora Kingsley? Sure, you know. She wrote
that book, Men Don't Like Them Never

Did. Let me ask you a question.

Did you ever read that book?

Well, I scanned it.

One or two chapters.

Are

you

hungry? I'm starved. I'm sure glad we
didn't have any breakfast.

Me too.

Great.

Oh. Please, you two are not really going
to eat those, are you?

We were considering it, yes.

I mean, even the cracker.

Bromated wheat.

Bromated. Do you know how many chemicals
they use to bromate wheat?

I never thought about that.

Probably because it's too frightening to
remember.

What about these?

Fish eggs.

Watch as I shudder.

Dirty water.

Dirty fish.

I guess I'll just settle for celery.

Sure, if you don't mind the pesticides.

Who was that?

Reginald Cinder.

What did he write?

Are you sure you aren't what you eat?

Are you sure?

I'm not.

Ah!

This can't be too bad.

Try this.

Delicious. What is it?

Watercress. What do you think?

Not a cheeseburger.

No, sir? Cheeseburger?

Thanks.

Best breakers in the city.

You gotta know I just don't slip out
here for just anybody.

But I know how you get when Mr. and Mrs.
H leave town.

Keep it between us, don't squirt, or
we'll both end up on kibble and water.

Hey, squirt, stop eating and give me the
phone.

Max here.

Oh, yeah, dude.

Look, I need a little legwork.

Yeah, I'll fill you in when I see you.

No way, you're not getting fried.

Wow.

Where are you?

The part where Marjorie goes into the
house alone.

Oh, I'm not there yet.

Oh, it's great. She goes into the house
alone. Oh, no, no, no. Please, don't

tell me.

I want to find it on my own.

Did you get to the part when they...

How much do you know about this Stacy
Rogers?

Sorry.

I only know that Stacy Rogers is one of
Alfred Ray's most successful fiction

writers.

I can certainly understand why.

She takes you on a ride here that's
unbelievable.

Wow. See what I mean?

No, I mean, wow.

I'm hungry.

I'm going to get something to eat.

Can I bring you anything?

No, thanks. I think I'll stay here and
finish this chap. Okay.

I got it, thanks.

Oh.

Eric Roth.

Jennifer Hart.

I want you to know I'm not usually in
the habit of refusing help from such a

beautiful woman.

But considering I wrote I Can Do It
Alone, it might look a little funny to

people if they caught you doing it for
me.

Oh, I saw you on television.

Very inspirational.

Yeah, well, that inspiration's become
something of an albatross for me.

See, I tried to give handicapped people
a little push and encouragement.

Now I can't accept a favor from anybody.

Maybe my next book should be Accepting
Help with Grace.

Oh, well, I tell you, if Grace is ever
not around and I can do anything, just

give me a call.

I'll try to find an excuse, I promise.

Okay.

Yeah, girls are fantastic.

Oh.

Yummy.

Oh, boy.

Hi there.

Hi.

Uh, the water is great.

It's really good here.

He's here for the weekend. It's a big
bash.

It has to look like an accident.

That's a must. That's what it were.

As soon as people start wondering about
motive or something.

But you figured it out.

Absolutely.

The hardest part is getting him
separated from the crowd.

So, we get him out on a fishing boat.

We get five or six other people to go
with him. It's perfect.

A few others will die in the accident.

No one will even know that our guy was
the intended target.

What kind of accident?

Fire.

It's clean and it's thorough.

It also gives a few of the others a
chance to save themselves.

Two or three people survive out of six.
It's very real, very natural.

And how do you know that our man won't
be one of the people who saves

themselves? Because he'll be drugged.

A few sips of his drink, he'll get low
-key, start to feel a little faint.

go down into the cabin and sleep it off.
By the time the fire breaks out, he

hasn't got a chance.

I'm telling you.

The man will die, and no one will even
suspect murder.

Jonathan, I see you found my favorite
spot.

I also understand I'm reading your
favorite author.

Second favorite author.

That's a wonderful book, isn't it?

Yeah, it's great.

Is, uh...

Stacy Rogers here? Yes, Stacy Rogers is
indeed here.

I'd like to meet her.

Well, I'm sure you'll find it very
interesting.

Now, Jonathan, I did not come down here
merely to make a social call.

Now, I was kind of hoping that you might
give me a little advice on how to

entice your wife.

Al, Jennifer and I made an arrangement
years ago.

She doesn't borrow my razor, and I don't
make her business deals.

She's very good at managing her own
affairs.

All right. Well, then I'll just leave it
up to her.

All I ask is 20 minutes alone with her
once I have the proposal drawn up, huh?

Well, just let her know.

I'm sure you'll find her very
reasonable.

Thanks.

Oh, I thought it was an eternity.

I have to show you something. What's
wrong?

I just overheard two men planning a
murder, planning to murder someone here

the party.

Did you get a look at them?

Yes, but I don't think I could recognize
them. Maybe one of them. He was gray

with a thin face.

But you would recognize him if you saw
him again? I think so.

Let's go find him.

Okay.

I was standing right here.

What were you doing?

I was drinking water.

You were standing in the middle of the
bridge drinking water? Why?

Because I was trying to get away from
Reginald.

Where was Reginald? Well, he was over...
Oh, darling, it has nothing to do with

him. Listen, I was standing right here
when I heard the first man who said,

take my word for it, this is the perfect
murder.

And then the two of them went on to
discuss how they were going to do it

weekend. Well, there's only so many
people on the island. We ought to be

find them.

All right.

You know, I should have made my move
when I had the chance. You've already

someone else.

Don't tell me I know. It's my new
aftershave.

This is my husband, Jonathan Hart, Eric
Roth.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Hart.

Husband, huh? I guess that was later
than I thought.

You didn't buy any chance. You two men
under the bridge talking earlier, did

you?

No, I didn't.

Oh.

Excuse me.

See you.

Maybe you could loan me your aftershave
sometime.

Anytime.

Excuse me.

I could have won it.

We're looking for a man that... That was
the lights.

You do know that.

The lights?

The fluorescent lights.

Well, he did something to them.

Well, maybe he was wearing special
contacts so they didn't affect him, but

couldn't concentrate.

Those lights.

Those lights were slowly driving me out
of my mind.

Really? Not to mention the fact that he
hypnotized me, too.

Oh, it's a blunder, no doubt about it.

He couldn't have planned that on one.

We were wondering if you saw a man... A
thin -faced, gray hair.

His hair turned gray?

Who? What do you mean, who? Who are you
talking about?

Well, I know who I'm talking about. Who
are you talking about?

Spassky.

I want to give you people fair warning.
If you get close to him, do not look

into those eyes.

That's how he did it.

That's how he...

Don't you

think

it'd be a good idea to see his face?
Just to make sure.

What are you doing?

I'm going up to him. That's the murder.

I'm just going to get a shrimp. I'm sure
I'll be safe.

Pardon me. You know who I see here to
get some ice?

The guy you want to see is Alfred.

Excuse me.

Oh, my God.

Johnny!

Frank. Yes!

Frank Culver.

Remember me telling you about Frank
Culver? He was my best friend in school.

Frank, great to see you. Good to see
you. You look wonderful. Where's the

surprise?

This is my wife, Jennifer.

Oh, how do you do, Jennifer?

What am I saying?

You're Johnny's wife.

Hello, Jennifer.

Nice to meet you.

What's it been, Johnny? 30, 35 years?

Who's counting?

You're doing great. Every time I open
the paper, it's Jonathan Hart this,

Jonathan Hart that.

You've been doing great, Jonathan.

Well, how are you doing?

Well, not as good as you, but what's the
surprise?

Just like it was in college.

Jonathan was always most likely to
succeed. I was always most likely to be

hanging around Jonathan.

What do you say we grab a table?

I've got 30, 35 years to catch up on.
Come on. Great.

Jonathan, that's him.

That's the guy.

What have you been doing, Frank?

I've been writing for the past 12 years.

Surprise, huh?

Well, not so much. You always wanted to
write the great American novel.

Well, I'm afraid that one's going to
have to wait for a little while.

You don't become a Hemingway just
because you want to. You have to have it

you. Oh, you've always had it in you.

The trick was getting it out.

Ha, ha, ha, ha. Just like old times.

You may be right about that, John.

But in the meantime, I've been writing
mysteries.

Mysteries?

We love mysteries.

Really? Could we have read any of them
or seen any of them?

Well, you might have stumbled across one
or two.

You wouldn't have known it was me. I've
been writing under a pseudonym.

Say the real thing for the real thing.
You know what I mean?

You ever hear of Stacey Rogers?

Stacey Rogers? Are you Stacey Rogers?

Guilty.

Hey, that's terrific.

Really? Yeah.

We've read most of her books.

I mean, we've read most of your books.

I had no idea.

Anyway, that's what I'm doing here.

And I've read a couple of your books.
You've done wonderful work.

I didn't know you were with Rand.

Thank you.

I'm not.

Well, not yet.

As always, John, you've done good.

I don't know what happened to me in that
department.

Things just didn't work out the way I
planned.

And it's your fault.

Hanging around with you all those years,
I guess I just wouldn't settle for

second best.

Just between you and me, Jennifer, there
was many a night I lay awake plotting

this man's murder.

You okay?

I'm fine. I'm just a little tired.

It's been a long, long day.

Maybe we can take this up tomorrow.

How about a threesome?

Rain has got a fabulous 18 -hole golf
course here. I'd love that, as long as

it's not too early.

Jen? Fine.

See you then. All right.

You get some rest.

Good to see you, Jen.

Thanks, Frank.

Why didn't you say anything?

What was I going to say?

Well... Gee, Frank, it's good to see
you. And while we're at it, my wife

you're a murderer.

Oh. Darling, think about it. If you're
right, then you don't want him to know

that you know.

No, that's right.

Don't think about it that way. We just
can't do nothing.

Look, we'll meet him tomorrow for a
little golf. We'll go out on the golf

course, have a little small talk
conversation, and then we'll play it by

All right.

All right.

Just relax.

Put your hands together.

Move them back and forth.

Like that?

Very slowly.

Oh. Very softly.

That's good.

Have you been practicing without me?

No, no, no. It's just beginner's luck.

You wouldn't want to bet me on the next
one.

Joking. Just joking.

Oh, sure.

Practicing. No fair, John.

I was just giving Jennifer some
pointers.

Well, I got some good news and some bad
news.

The bad news is the sprinkler system
went bonkers. No golf today.

But the good news is that our
illustrious host, Mr. Alfred, I supply

with everything.

Rain is taking care of things.

Instead of golf, a bunch of us are going
to do some deep sea fishing.

Hey, I'd love that.

I was hoping to get some fishing in
while I was here.

Well, great. Now you've got your chance.
We'll see you at the boat in 30

minutes. You got it. Don't be late.

Darling. Great news.

Guess what?

We're going fishing.

Fishing?

I just spoke with Al. Frank got a
business call. That's why we took off

him. So?

So. Don't you think that's a little
convenient?

Well, maybe with a little luck, we could
get shipwrecked.

Jonathan. Just imagine, you and me alone
for a weekend on a deserted island,

huh?

Relax. I am relaxed.

Darling, what's wrong?

Oh, no.

You're a little queasy.

Really?

I think I'll go below. Is that your
stomach?

Catch a big one, darling. But darling, I
have to tell you something.

I kind of lost my seat right there.

Darling.

Oh, Al.

You've got to stop this boat.

What? Don't ask me to explain. Just stop
the boat.

What, is something wrong?

It's going to burst into flames.

What are you talking about?

Please don't ask me to explain. Just
stop the boat.

Jennifer, my mechanics go over these
boats at least once a week. There's

wrong with the engine. How can you be
sure?

All right, if it'll make you feel
better, we'll take a look.

Okay. Ralph? Yes,

sir. Oh, don't you think it's a good
idea to put the fire extinguisher on?

No, that's not... Please, sir.

Oh, God.

fire from that tool shed.

Well, there's the problem.

That wire's been stripped back way too
far.

This is very sloppy wood.

Now, how did you know about this? You
seem to know about the fire before it

happened.

Well, didn't you smell it?

No, I didn't smell anything.

Well, I... smell very strongly from
where I was standing.

I naturally assumed it was in the
engine.

Well, I guess we're all very lucky we
have such a great sense of smell.

How are you doing?

Oh, fine. I'm feeling much better. You
are?

Yeah. Much better.

Oh, thanks.

Because I have bad news.

What is it?

Frank Culver just tried to kill you.

What are you talking about?

Everything that just happened. It was
detail for detail what I overheard Frank

planning. Darling, you heard Al.

The motor had faulty wiring. And I heard
Frank get the man on the fishing boat,

rug him so he'll go below and go to
sleep and then burn the boat, and Frank

conveniently missed the proverbial boat.

I don't understand. Why would Frank want
to kill me?

I don't know.

But didn't he say he was thinking of
killing you? Oh, people use that

all the time. Well, maybe he...

was jealous of your success after all
these years.

Well, I'm sure there's a reasonable
explanation for all of this.

Don't stare at me, swerve. Go on, get
something to use me.

How's it going?

It's going, Duke.

I need a tip. Sort of inside stuff.

The 5th of Santa Anita. A guarantee.

Not the ponies, Duke.

Stock market.

Stock market? What, are you nuts?

Stick with the ponies, Max. It's a lot
safer.

Come on, you can do better than that.

Safer or not, I gotta find out who's
buying up the hot industry stock.

What kind of buying are we talking
about?

Big boys.

Forget the kiddie stuff.

How come your boss isn't doing this
himself?

He and Mrs. H are out for the big bash
at Alfred Rain's place.

Alfred Rain, the publisher, the guy with
the island.

The shoe was better than that. Come on,
Squirt, try again.

That's the place.

Okay, Max, but I'm a bookie. I'm not
real comfortable with these stock market

types. Thanks, dude.

Where's the mud?

What do you got there, squirt?

Glad to see you're feeling better,
Jonathan. Oh, thank you very much.

Do you mind if I ask what you had for
lunch?

Why? Just curious.

Well, I had the shrimp salad sandwich,
right?

Well, then I am afraid I owe you a
tremendous apology.

I have just spoken with one of my staff
people. I don't know how this happened,

but it seems that the shrimp salad was
spoiled.

Now, I'm told we had a few people fall
ill back here at the house, too. Same

thing that happened to you.

Convenient. Excuse me?

Oh, it's just a little something between
the two of us.

Sorry. Well, once again, my apologies to
both of you.

And now I have a chef to fire.

Well, what do you think?

Interesting story, huh?

There you are.

I'm so sorry I missed the boat.

Not that it would be the first time.

Catch anything?

Shrimp salad.

I beg your pardon.

Frank, there's something we want to talk
to you about.

Shoot?

Yesterday, when Jennifer was standing
over there on the bridge, she overheard

you.

Talking about what?

About killing someone.

Killing someone on this weekend.

On a fishing boat, drugs, fire,
everything that just happened to

Could we have a drink?

Jennifer, you're absolutely right.

Everything you said you heard, you
heard.

Until you put it together, I never even
thought about it, but you did hear me

plotting a murder.

None of that was real.

It was fiction.

Hypothesis. I was helping someone plot
out a murder, mister.

Really?

Why would I make something like that up?

A fella came up to me.

Right over here, as a matter of fact.

He started praising my books, and before
I knew it, he was asking me to help him

with a book he was trying to write.

Just like that?

Just like that.

He was stuck trying to figure out how to
pull off the murder among all these

people and still get away with it.

It's just a story. Do you always give
away your ideas for free?

Well, I'm a writer.

I carry ideas around in my pocket.

Besides, there were only a couple of
thoughts. It wasn't as though it was a

complex scenario.

And he was so flattering, I guess I
couldn't resist.

I admitted I was showing off.

Who is this man, Frank?

I was afraid you were going to ask that
question.

I don't know.

I never saw him before. I certainly
haven't seen him since.

It isn't exactly the strongest story.

Maybe so, but it's the truth.

Jonathan, I'm a writer.

If I were trying to think up a way to
kill you, don't you think I'd come up

a better story than that?

What do I have to do to convince you?

Well, finding the man might be a step in
the right direction.

Okay.

We'll do it tonight.

Everyone will gather for dinner. We'll
just cruise the room and check out the

faces. It should be a snap.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your
attention, please? I have an

to make.

The masquerade party, which was
scheduled for tomorrow night, will be

tonight.

Wonderful.

There goes your snap.

Any luck?

Not so far.

His costumes aren't helping either.

We'll keep looking.

Okay. Once more into the breach.

Ooh,

champagne and pizza.

Ooh, full of...

Calories, cholesterol, and fat.

What do you think?

It is a masquerade, Ollie. We should
keep up appearances.

Hi there.

You didn't see that.

I didn't?

And if you say anything, I'll just deny
it.

Well, if it's good enough for him.

It's good enough for us, Ollie.

I'm sorry.

Oh, God.

Jonathan. Jennifer.

I see you got your appetite back,
Jonathan.

Good as new. Thank God.

I thought this might be the right time
to have that little talk with Jennifer.

Oh, that's your party.

Publisher parish.

Right this way.

Now just remember, no more shrimp salad.

Word of honor.

Have a seat, Jonathan.

Now, I could talk and talk, but it would
be just that, talk.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

A contract?

Your contract.

Your proposed contract.

Most of what you need to know is on the
first page.

Oh.

Very generous.

I'm a publisher.

I know what's important to writers, and
I think I know what's important to you.

There is a lot of creative support in
that paper.

It's a very good deal.

It's one of the best I've ever offered.

You are serious.

Very.

What's going on? What happened?

Someone's been shot!

Oh, my God. John!

That's him, John.

That's the man who asked me to help him
plot the murder.

I have a feeling, darling, someone else
was thinking exactly the same thing.

His name was Harold Simpson.

Is, Mr. Raines. His name is Harold
Simpson.

Because a man has died doesn't mean his
name has changed.

Fine.

And I understand he was one of your
invited guests?

Yes, yes, he was.

Is an aspiring author.

Was an aspiring author, Mr. Rain.

Being dead, it seems unlikely he will
write many more books.

I understand you were not present at the
time of the shooting.

Yes, that's correct. I was in my office
at the time.

So you were present.

You are not at the scene of the crime.

Right.

Thank you.

I hope you understand.

It helps to be precise.

Of course.

Now, with your permission, perhaps some
of your other guests can shed some more

light on this tragedy.

You know, you might start with Mr. and
Mrs. Hart.

They seemed quite anxious to speak to
the police.

And I suppose they still are.

Thank you.

There's no doubt about it, Detective Wu.

Who? Who?

Whoever killed that man was trying to
kill my husband.

I'm here only for the facts of the case,
Mrs. Hart. That's what I'm trying to

tell you. No.

You're giving me conjecture. Your
opinions, fascinating as they are,

facts. Well...

Isn't it a fact that that man was
dressed in the same costume as my

he wound up shot to death?

It is.

But what you're concluding may be mere
coincidence.

Coincidence?

Is it a coincidence that that was the
very man who was talking about murder

Frank Culver and everything that Frank
suggested wound up happening to my

husband? As we sit here, Mrs. Hart, your
husband seems to be in perfect health.

Another man is dead, and those are the
facts.

You can't tell me that you know for sure
that my husband wasn't the intended

victim. Now, that's a fact, isn't it?

I'm afraid not.

Detective Wu.

Who? Who?

How can you say that?

What happened last night, Mrs. Hart, was
not a murder.

It was a suicide.

Suicide? I don't believe it.

Perhaps this will help.

It's a note.

It was written on his letterhead.

Harold Simpson.

In it, he talks a little about his
business, his family problems, and he

with, I realize that I will be
considered a coward for taking the easy

I prefer to see my death as an act of
courage.

I've done everything I could, and though
I had all my pieces on the board,

I find myself in checkmate.

You see, the facts can be useful.

It doesn't make any sense.

Facts always make sense, Mrs. Hart.

One has to know how to put them in the
proper order.

You absolutely sure of that?

Who knows?

It's on first.

What?

Second base.

Oh, Jonathan.

Do you get the feeling someone is trying
to play games with us?

I do.

But why?

Who knows who?

Well, I don't believe any of this.

If that man committed suicide, I'm the
real Oliver Hardy.

I think it's time we packed up and got
out of this place.

Maybe we can catch a ride back to
Honolulu with Detective Who.

Good idea.

I was hoping to catch up to the two of
you. Can you spare me a couple of

minutes? Just the two of us, I'm sorry,
for old time's sake.

I'll go pack.

Thanks, Jennifer. I won't keep him long,
I promise.

Well, this has not exactly been a class
reunion.

No pun intended.

It's been interesting.

It's like old times. I stepped knee
-deep into it, and you were trying to

me out by the ears.

Let me own this one, Jonathan.

I played the patsy for someone who was
clearly trying to set you up, and I'm

sorry. Uh -oh, you don't have to
apologize.

You had no idea you were being used.

Well, I want to apologize. I'm hoping
that after all this blows over, under

different circumstances, maybe we
could... I'd look forward to it.

In the meantime, you might actually
write that great American novel you

dreamed about.

I stopped dreaming a long time ago.

It's been finished for a while.

Really?

Just haven't had the guts to show it to
anyone.

Afraid it might not be everything I
planned for it to be.

And yet I can't face the idea of being
Stacy Rogers for the rest of my life. If

you don't take the risks.

I know, I know. Nothing ventured.

Well, I can't leave it in my closet
forever. Even the moths are getting

Well, if you ever want someone to look
at it, let me know.

You'll be the first.

I mean that.

You've been a good friend, Jenna.

Take care of yourself.

It's been good to see you.

I know he apologized profusely, but I
still don't trust dear old Frank.

It all started with him.

Or maybe he's telling the truth.

He could be a patsy for someone else.

Hello?

Oh, no.

What, packing already?

No, the guests are supposed to leave
tomorrow morning at 11 o 'clock.

Al. I know. Poor Harold Simpson's
suicide has sort of put a damper on the

atmosphere, hasn't it?

Death tends to do that.

We hate to spoil your weekend, but...

After all that's happened, I think it's
time that we say our goodbyes.

This party, for me, has been a disaster.

I'm mortified.

I'm sorry.

Now, let me check with the police about
taking you back, huh?

Al.

How well did you know Harold Simpson?

Hardly at all, really.

I invited him because he wrote one
foreign piece that I published.

He was trying to get into mysteries.

You know, he was a big fan of Frank's.

Followed all his work. Used to write to
Frank all the time.

You mean they knew each other?

I don't know if they actually knew each
other. I think it was mostly through the

mail. But Simpson told me that he used
to write Frank fan letters all the time.

Curiouser and curiouser.

Do you think he committed suicide?

You don't?

I keep asking myself this one question.

If he shot himself, then who pushed the
button in the elevator to send him up?

Jonathan, you should have been a mystery
writer yourself.

Now, would you please tell that to
Detective Who? Maybe he can do a little

digging here.

Meanwhile, I'll send someone up for your
bags.

Oh, and Jennifer, please do not forget
my offer. I still intend to make you

of my team.

Mr. and Mrs. Hart, wait, please.

I was asked to give you this note before
you left.

Thank you.

Who's that from?

Frank.

John, I think I've figured this whole
thing out. Meet me at the old shack as

soon as you can.

It's important.

I'm going to check this out. Oh, I don't
try that.

Ten minutes, Tox.

I'll be fine.

Very strict schedule.

Detective, I'm sure he'll be here in
just a minute.

Fact is, Mrs. Hart, we're only 30
minutes away by air. If you need us,

call.

And ask for who?

Absolutely.

No, no, no. No, take it.

I'm sorry, you'll have to take those
bags back. Oh, would you take this with

after the room? Yes, ma 'am.

Shut the fuck up!

Oh!

What's going on here?

What the hell happened here?

What did I do?

Get out!

Jonathan, I've been looking all over for
you.

What in the world happened?

Well, it seems that someone wanted me to
take an unscheduled swim. If it hadn't

been for Eric, you'd have been in real
trouble. No problem, John.

It's like the two of you could use a hot
bath.

I'll get some of the sand out of my
teeth.

Do you mind if we just sit here and
relax a while until I figure out what's

going on?

I knew who hit me. I think we should
call Detective Who.

He said he could be here in half an
hour.

What do you think?

Who?

I'll give you two good reasons.

What? One is, if we leave now, we'll
never find out who's at the bottom of

And two?

And two is, darling, I don't actually
think that my life is in danger. Oh,

Jonathan, you can't be serious.

What would have happened if I didn't
know about the fire on the boat?

And what would have happened if Eric
hadn't just come along at that moment?

that's just the point. You see... You
did know about the fire on the boat, and

Eric did come along just at the right
time. No, no, I think we were just very

lucky. Sit down.

I found this in the shack looking for
Frank.

It was hanging from its neck.

You think someone's trying to tell me
something?

Grace, why don't we go home and they can
fact it to you?

What makes you think that all this would
stop if we went home?

What are you saying?

If I'm right, and this is all somehow
connected to the stock purchases, then

what's going on here is going on at
home.

And it all started before we got here.

Damn it.

What? Oh, I keep thinking about the
suicide note. I keep reaching back,

trying to grab it.

Because there was something in that
phrase about all the men being on the

It's all a game.

Don't you see, darling?

You overhearing Frank, Simpson being in
my costume, Eric being on the beach at

just the right time.

Simpson didn't commit suicide. He was
murdered by someone who wanted to prove

point that I'm a target, an easy target.

He was a sacrifice for the game.

A pawn.

In an elaborate game of chess.

And it all keeps coming back to Frank.

I swear to you, I don't know what you're
talking about.

This.

The note that got me over to that old
shack that nearly took my life.

Jonathan, I didn't write this.

This isn't even my handwriting.

What do I have to do to get you two to
believe me? Try telling the truth.

That's what I'm doing.

How well did you know Harold Simpson?

I told you I didn't know him at all.

He struck up a conversation with me.

Next time I saw him, he had a bullet
hole in his head.

That's the truth, Jonathan. You may not
believe it, but that's the truth.

He never wrote you letters?

Wrote me letters.

Fan letters?

Fan letters?

Jennifer, I don't get fan letters.

Stacy Rogers, remember?

Stacey Rogers gets thousands of fan
letters. I never see them.

The publisher has people to take care of
those.

Oh, boy.

Oh.

This is beginning to sound like one of
your mysteries.

Well, then maybe I can help.

I write them.

I've spent a lot of time trying to put
characters into mysteries.

Since we are the characters in this one,
maybe if we work backwards, we can find

our way out.

Beginning where?

Friends, relatives, enemies.

Anybody would have a reason to put you
through something like this.

What we have to do is take it apart and
put it together again.

I found this in the shack when I went to
meet you.

It was hanging by its neck from a wire.

Well, this is a hell of a lot more than
a coincidence.

Look, we all agree there was no suicide,
right?

Somebody killed Simpson and then planted
a note on him with references to a

chess game.

Suicide and chess, that's the key.

What is it, darling? You look as if
you've seen a ghost.

I may have.

I've never seen you go picky.

Always talk about stocks, having Mr. and
Mrs. H out of town.

A lot of stress.

Tell you what, after all this is over,
you and me are going to have a little

vacation out of town.

Son, girls, biscuits, the whole nine
yards.

Hello?

Hello, Max.

How are things going?

Fine. Sir H., we're doing fine.

How about you guys?

Everything is great here.

I'll tell you about it when I get back.

Listen, Max, I need you to get some
information for me.

It's something that happened back in the
summer of 1980.

You got it.

See what you can find out concerning the
death of a man called Rupert Holmes.

Rupert Holmes?

Yeah, businessman.

He killed himself that summer.

It was in all the papers.

It will be in Honolulu tomorrow.

I can check with you then. We get in
about 12 o 'clock.

Will do, Mr.

H.

Here

you

are, sir.

Lemonade?

Sure.

Donnie, what are you trying to find out?

Maybe the name of the man that thinks
that I'm responsible for the death of

Rupert Holmes.

Jonathan, you're going to have to bring
me up to speed here. Who is Rupert

Holmes? He was a competitor of mine.
About a year before he died, we were

the same company.

And you won.

There were a lot of moves and counter
moves, and in the end, some bad moves.

He got into deep trouble.

Checkmate.

Didn't you offer him a 50 -50 deal?

I seem to recall you helped him as much
as you could.

Well, he lost most of his money in a
proxy fight.

Then he started to undermine his other
companies. I actually staked him to a

start.

It was after he lost that money that he
committed suicide.

He was very sad.

What made you think of him?

I don't know.

Something bothered me about that Simpson
suicide note.

With a similarity.

The reference to the death game.

He had all the pieces on the board and
he couldn't make it.

So, at least we have a possible why.

Now the question is who?

Right.

Who?

Frank knew Simpson.

He says no, but... Crane says that...

Simpson wrote him letters.

No.

Maybe Frank didn't realize the
connection.

Simpson may have written to him
anonymously.

Oh, Don.

Don, I know you don't want to admit it
because Frank is your friend, but

really...

He's probably the one that's playing
with us.

Ready for dinner?

My bailiwick now, pal.

Mystery.

Tonight, we'll get to the bottom of
this.

I don't know what's happened to me. I
don't feel very well.

I feel... Jonathan,

you okay?

I wish I knew the number of that bus.

Jonathan!

The helicopter left three hours ago.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

Well, you'd think there'd be somebody
here, just some staff to watch the

I don't know what to think anymore.

Hello? Hello?

Anybody here?

Hello?

Hello?

Any luck?

Nothing. Did you check Raines' office?

Nothing.

I'll check the staff quarters. You check
the kitchen. I'll meet you back here.

Hello?

We've got to get to that radio equipment
somehow.

But you said it yourself.

If someone planned every detail, why
would they leave us a radio that worked?

Sometimes human beings make mistakes.

Maybe leaving that radio equipment was
one of them.

First things first.

We've got power.

That's a start.

I hope so.

Mayday. Mayday.

Mayday on Rain's Island.

Does anybody hear me?

Mayday. Mayday. This is Jonathan Hart on
Rain's Island. Does anyone hear me?

Come back.

My wife and I are stranded here on
Rain's Island.

Could you send in a chopper for us?

Right. Standing by.

Don't you think you should try to
contact Detective Hu?

Yes,

copy.

Yeah,

that'd be great.

Listen, could you contact Detective Hu
of the Honolulu Police Department?

Tell him there's been a murder here on
the island. No one's here and there's no

phones out.

Could you do that for us? Do you copy
that?

Yeah, much better now. Thanks. We'll be
waiting for you.

Now that is a start.

It is.

Max, let me ask you a question.

Don't all these trees and birds and
fresh air get on your nerves?

He likes it.

Well, it makes me uncomfortable.

Too much open spaces.

Next time, let's do this at Ziggy's Pub.

What do you got, Duke?

Okay. Rupert Holmes. Like you said, the
guy offed himself.

There's not much there.

Except this really weird note.

Something about chess pieces.

What do you want?

No, no, doggie. This is mine.

You know this guy Holmes had a family?

Max, you ought to think about feeding
this dog from time to time.

He's better than you do.

You wouldn't know it from looking at
him.

He's also a better con man than you are.

What's so important about the Holmes
family?

He had a stepson. I bet you didn't know
that. But wait, it gets better.

You know all that stock stuff you had me
running down?

Well, guess who's been buying up Mr.
Hardstock?

The stepson. Now, I'll give you one shot
at guessing who the stepson is.

Alfred Rain.

I got a call of hearts.

Now, give the dog a prize.

You know what bag my glasses would be
in?

Try the zipper one.

The chopper's supposed to come from this
direction.

What's this?

I don't know.

I wanted you to be the first. You
convinced me that I can survive even if

only good.

What is it?

Fool's Gold by Frank Culver.

Must be the galleys to the book he
wrote.

Under his own name?

Yeah, he promised to write this book a
long time ago. This is a book about

youth. It's also a book about dreams.

I suppose it's no surprise how often
those two words walk hand in hand.

If it were not for the dreams of our
youth, the sheer belief in the possible,

our world would be without fancy,
without color, without music.

Therefore, I dedicate this book not to
one person, but to my adolescence.

To all that I believe possible and to
the good friends who convinced me to go

believing.

Oh, that's for you.

I promised him I'd help him get this
book published.

You know what?

You're going to keep that promise.

Shouldn't we be heading east?

I've got one more stop to make on the
far side of the island. Another call.

It's got another stop on the other side
of the island.

It's got another call on the other side
of the island.

I have to get out of here.

I don't understand.

I don't get it, Squirt.

Still no answer.

Mr. Ray said they'd be in Honolulu by
now.

Yeah, I've been trying to reach Mr.

and Mrs. Hunt for a couple hours now.

What do you mean they didn't check in?

They were supposed to check in four
hours ago.

Okay, thanks.

Something ain't right here, Squirt.

I think maybe it's time we call the
Honolulu cops.

saying this is crazy? It must be 40
miles back to that house. Well, that's

miles left of when we started.

We'll stop further up.

Don't die.

Can we just wait a minute?

Oh.

I hate to bring this up at a time like
this, but... You know, even when we get

back to the house, we're still going to
be in the same predicament.

I'm open to suggestions.

Jonathan, welcome to the game's final
round.

Alfred? How does it feel, Jonathan?

How does it feel to be toyed with?

To be run ragged until you drop with
exhaustion?

Until there's nothing left of you?
Alfred, what is this all about?

I don't think he can hear you.

He said he'd love to do that himself.

Well, unfortunately, I can't count on
you taking the same way out. But I can

push. I can push you to the end of your
rope.

You may survive, you may not.

But isn't that what games are all about?

Is that really a big point?

Come on.

Let's go.

Next year, let's just go to the movies.

Beginning to know the feeling, Tom?

Beginning to know what it feels like to
be at the end of your line with nowhere

to run?

I've been waiting a long time for this,
Jonathan.

Game's over.

Al.

How could you do this?

I never tried to hurt your father.

Too little, too late, Jonathan. Just
like now.

I win.

Now!

Game,

set, and match.

Go on, Stanley.

Stanley, go on.

I've got stage fright.

Oh, don't be silly.

It's all in the script. All you have to
do is say it.

I can't.

Oh, there's nothing to it.

You just have to look at the camera and
say, Hello!

We're safe and sound and we're here in
Hawaii!

Say it.

You just said it.

Oh, all right. Well, then forget all
that. Now you just look at the camera

you say, We love you! We miss you! We'll
be home soon!

Go on.

You just said it.

You know something, Molly?

What? I love you.

That's not in the script.

I know.

Now what do we say?

I got an idea.

Hey, Max.

Max, you're going to see something now
you've never seen before and you never

will again.

I really love those two.

Do it? Do it, Ollie.

Oh, don't make me do it.

All right, Stanley.

There's another fine mess you've gotten
us into.

That's what I call a postcard.