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Oliver: ♪ green acres
Is the place to be ♪
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00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:32,497
♪ farm livin' is
The life for me ♪
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♪ land spreadin'
Out so far and wide ♪
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♪ keep manhattan, just
Give me that countryside ♪
5
00:00:40,407 --> 00:00:41,973
Lisa: ♪ new york ♪
6
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:44,442
♪ is where I'd rather stay ♪
7
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♪ I get allergic ♪
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♪ smelling hay ♪
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00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:52,117
♪ I just adore a
Penthouse view ♪
10
00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:53,426
♪ darling, I love you ♪
11
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♪ but give me park avenue ♪
12
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♪ the chores ♪
13
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♪ the stores ♪
14
00:01:01,929 --> 00:01:03,695
♪ fresh air ♪
15
00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:04,874
♪ times square ♪
16
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,464
♪ you are my wife ♪
17
00:01:06,533 --> 00:01:08,311
♪ good-bye, city life ♪
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♪ green acres, we are there ♪
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Captioning made possible
By mgm home entertainment
20
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:29,766
You want me to cover up
21
00:01:29,790 --> 00:01:30,800
This lumber, mr. Douglas?
22
00:01:30,824 --> 00:01:31,956
What for?
23
00:01:32,025 --> 00:01:33,236
It makes the rest of the house
24
00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:34,671
Look worse than it is.
25
00:01:34,695 --> 00:01:35,627
If that's possible.
26
00:01:35,696 --> 00:01:37,040
That's funny. Give
Me a hand here,
27
00:01:37,064 --> 00:01:38,408
Will you? Yes, sir.
28
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:39,364
You're really going
29
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:40,477
To rebuild this house?
30
00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:42,011
Yep. That's why I'm
Pulling this stump out.
31
00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:45,504
I'm gonna extend the
House out about this far.
32
00:02:00,688 --> 00:02:02,632
Give her full
Power, mr. Douglas.
33
00:02:02,656 --> 00:02:04,489
I am!
34
00:02:12,999 --> 00:02:15,434
Go ahead and say
It, mr. Douglas.
35
00:02:15,502 --> 00:02:17,202
That won't be necessary.
36
00:02:17,271 --> 00:02:19,504
I'm perfectly capable
Of controlling my...
37
00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:21,293
Ooh! You dirty...
38
00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:24,809
What happened?
39
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:28,813
Ooh! I was trying to
Pull this stump out.
40
00:02:28,882 --> 00:02:31,216
I got the tractor going
And rope tight and like...
41
00:02:33,954 --> 00:02:35,498
Well, why didn't
You do it that way
42
00:02:35,522 --> 00:02:38,223
Instead of ruining the tractor?
43
00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:41,526
Oh, wait till I see that haney.
44
00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:49,301
Well. Morning,
Mr. Douglas. Mrs. Douglas.
45
00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:50,869
Mr. Haney.
46
00:02:50,937 --> 00:02:52,697
Look at that tractor.
47
00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:55,685
Well, what's the matter with it?
48
00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:57,342
What's the matter?
49
00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:59,043
It came apart while I was trying
50
00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:01,012
To pull up that
Little tree stump!
51
00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:02,392
Well, you got it up, didn't you?
52
00:03:02,416 --> 00:03:04,082
I pulled it up by hand!
53
00:03:04,151 --> 00:03:05,662
Well, you should
Have done it that way
54
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:07,486
Before you ruined the tractor.
55
00:03:08,622 --> 00:03:10,889
Well, that's what I said.
56
00:03:10,957 --> 00:03:12,457
I know what you said.
57
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:13,892
But he said the same thing.
58
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:15,505
I don't care who said it!
59
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:18,497
Mr. Haney, you sold
Me a defective tractor!
60
00:03:18,565 --> 00:03:20,899
No, sir. It's not a defective.
61
00:03:20,967 --> 00:03:23,201
It's a hoyt clagwell.
62
00:03:23,270 --> 00:03:25,937
Yeah, a defective has
Bigger wheels in the front.
63
00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:28,540
Eb!
64
00:03:28,609 --> 00:03:30,253
Isn't there anything
You got to do?
65
00:03:30,277 --> 00:03:31,677
No, sir.
66
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:33,912
Then do it!
67
00:03:33,980 --> 00:03:35,447
Mr. Haney.
68
00:03:35,516 --> 00:03:37,193
That tractor is the last thing
69
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,795
You are ever going to sell me.
70
00:03:38,819 --> 00:03:39,751
Yeah, but...
71
00:03:39,820 --> 00:03:41,740
I don't even want
To talk to you!
72
00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:45,935
Oh, mrs. Douglas.
I'm sorry this had
73
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:47,604
To happen in front of you.
74
00:03:47,628 --> 00:03:50,529
Such a beautiful
And delicate lady.
75
00:03:50,597 --> 00:03:51,863
Why, thank you.
76
00:03:51,932 --> 00:03:54,800
Doggone, you're prettier
Than a little red wagon
77
00:03:54,868 --> 00:03:56,513
Going up a steep hill.
78
00:03:56,537 --> 00:04:00,104
Oh, please, seth. Don't...
79
00:04:00,173 --> 00:04:01,105
What's that mean?
80
00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:02,106
Huh?
81
00:04:02,175 --> 00:04:03,908
That thing about
A little red wagon
82
00:04:03,977 --> 00:04:05,655
Going up a steep hill.
What does that mean?
83
00:04:05,679 --> 00:04:06,611
I don't know.
84
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:07,612
It's just one of them things
85
00:04:07,681 --> 00:04:08,613
That you city folks
86
00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:11,583
Expect us country folks to say.
87
00:04:11,652 --> 00:04:13,418
Oh, mrs. Douglas.
88
00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:14,919
Ever time I see you,
89
00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:17,155
It reminds me of a speckled hen
90
00:04:17,224 --> 00:04:18,156
Setting under...
91
00:04:18,225 --> 00:04:19,624
Oh, come on!
92
00:04:19,693 --> 00:04:20,625
Eh, eh, eh.
93
00:04:20,694 --> 00:04:22,894
A speckled hen
Sitting under what?
94
00:04:22,963 --> 00:04:25,129
A little green wagon.
95
00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:27,366
Ohh. Isn't that charming?
96
00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:29,045
That doesn't make any more sense
97
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:31,837
Than a little red wagon
Going down a steep hill.
98
00:04:31,905 --> 00:04:34,105
Up the hill.
99
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:35,218
If you're gonna say 'em,
100
00:04:35,242 --> 00:04:36,553
Say 'em right or everbody'll
101
00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:38,537
Know you're from the city.
102
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,013
Mrs. Douglas, I've
Got your wallpaper
103
00:04:42,048 --> 00:04:42,981
On the truck.
104
00:04:43,049 --> 00:04:44,516
But we didn't order
Any wallpaper
105
00:04:44,585 --> 00:04:45,684
From you, mr. Haney.
106
00:04:45,753 --> 00:04:48,097
You will when you
See what I've got.
107
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,532
We don't want to see it.
108
00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:51,289
Oh, but, darling, we
Need some wallpaper,
109
00:04:51,358 --> 00:04:53,425
And it doesn't hurt to look.
110
00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:54,526
Mrs. Douglas,
111
00:04:54,595 --> 00:04:57,228
You're as thoughty
As a bluebird flying
112
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:59,564
Over a tumbledown yeller barn.
113
00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:01,266
Ohh.
114
00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:03,769
All right. We'll look
At your wallpaper.
115
00:05:06,339 --> 00:05:10,008
And this patter is
Called winter's dream.
116
00:05:10,076 --> 00:05:11,476
Winter's dream?
117
00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:12,555
Yeah. That's the kind of thing
118
00:05:12,579 --> 00:05:15,480
You dream about
During the winter.
119
00:05:15,549 --> 00:05:16,481
It might be the kind of thing
120
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:18,116
You dream about, not me.
121
00:05:19,553 --> 00:05:22,253
Oh, I... I'm afraid
I don't like this.
122
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,322
Well...
123
00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:29,060
How about camels
At the water hole?
124
00:05:29,129 --> 00:05:31,062
No. I don't like this, either.
125
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:32,764
I have to agree with you.
126
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:33,932
I like the water hole,
127
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,568
But the camels don't
Do anything for me.
128
00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:41,406
How about doctor's waiting room?
129
00:05:41,475 --> 00:05:43,141
No.
130
00:05:43,209 --> 00:05:44,609
It's real practical.
131
00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:46,277
You can sit anywhere in the room
132
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,246
And test your own eyes.
133
00:05:48,315 --> 00:05:51,650
There's nothing
Wrong with my eyes.
134
00:05:51,718 --> 00:05:53,084
Well, then I can't understand
135
00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:55,119
Why you don't
Like winter's dream.
136
00:05:56,623 --> 00:05:59,190
Now, ain't that a pretty
Pattern, mrs. Douglas?
137
00:05:59,259 --> 00:06:01,893
That's the one we
Got on there now.
138
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:05,029
I don't like it.
139
00:06:05,098 --> 00:06:06,531
Oh, I'm afraid, mr. Haney,
140
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,900
You haven't got anything
That appeals to us.
141
00:06:08,969 --> 00:06:11,336
Well, you don't have to
Make any snap judgment.
142
00:06:11,404 --> 00:06:12,571
Leave 'em up a week.
143
00:06:12,639 --> 00:06:13,705
Live with them.
144
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,740
You might learn
To like one of 'em.
145
00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:16,942
I doubt it.
146
00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:18,109
Well, like they say,
147
00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:19,744
Learning to like wallpaper
148
00:06:19,813 --> 00:06:22,246
Is like pushing a
Purple straw hat
149
00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,315
Through a keyhole.
150
00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:28,386
Pushing a purple
Straw hat through a...
151
00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:31,222
Don't try to figure it out.
152
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:32,291
Ha ha ha.
153
00:06:35,662 --> 00:06:37,629
We're pulling into
Hooterville, mrs. Douglas.
154
00:06:37,698 --> 00:06:41,199
That's the best news I've
Had since we left pixley.
155
00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:47,739
Hooterville!
156
00:06:47,808 --> 00:06:50,375
All ashore that's going ashore!
157
00:06:50,443 --> 00:06:52,143
Mrs. Douglas, where are you?
158
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,713
I'm right here.
159
00:06:54,781 --> 00:06:55,814
Mrs. Douglas,
160
00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:57,126
Passengers are not allowed
161
00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:59,150
In the baggage compartment.
162
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:00,705
They shouldn't be
Allowed anywhere else
163
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,086
In this train, either.
164
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,824
It's a menace to life and limb!
165
00:07:09,462 --> 00:07:12,163
Enjoyed your train
Ride, mrs. Douglas?
166
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,232
Train?
167
00:07:13,299 --> 00:07:15,967
How dare you call this
Liver shaker a train?
168
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:16,968
Need a hand?
169
00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:19,971
Keep your grimy
Hands to yourself.
170
00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:21,406
Visiting your son?
171
00:07:21,474 --> 00:07:22,407
Yes.
172
00:07:22,475 --> 00:07:24,053
I sent him a wire
To meet me here.
173
00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:25,588
I wonder where he is.
174
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:26,545
He's a nice fella.
175
00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:27,546
Folks around here
176
00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:28,758
Sure like him.
177
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:32,216
Then why did they let him
Buy that horrible farm?
178
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:33,852
The haney place?
179
00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:35,453
Ohh, it's not so bad.
180
00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:37,722
Is there someplace
I can get a taxi?
181
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,068
Yes, ma'am. Where?
182
00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:40,025
In pixley.
183
00:07:40,093 --> 00:07:41,626
Would you like to
Ride back with us?
184
00:07:41,695 --> 00:07:43,662
I wouldn't get back
On that horrible thing
185
00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:45,830
For all the money in the world.
186
00:07:45,899 --> 00:07:47,799
Where's hooterville?
187
00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:50,149
Right there behind
That billboard.
188
00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,006
That!
189
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:57,175
All right, floyd.
Best get rolling.
190
00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:02,346
Nice having you aboard, ma'am.
191
00:08:23,269 --> 00:08:24,269
Help!
192
00:08:30,410 --> 00:08:31,342
Good morning.
193
00:08:31,411 --> 00:08:32,555
Good morning, mr. Drucker.
194
00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:34,980
Sam: well, good morning,
Mr. Douglas, mrs. Douglas.
195
00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:37,148
Doggone, you look as
Pretty as a green wagon
196
00:08:37,217 --> 00:08:38,217
Going up a steep hill.
197
00:08:38,284 --> 00:08:39,324
Red wagon.
198
00:08:40,386 --> 00:08:41,586
Oh, I always said green.
199
00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:44,623
No, the green wagon
Is where the pickled hen
200
00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:45,924
Is sitting under.
201
00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:48,359
No. That's speckled hen.
202
00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:50,495
Yeah, but she's not sitting
Under a green wagon.
203
00:08:50,563 --> 00:08:52,530
She's hopping up and
Down on a hot silo.
204
00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:53,531
Speckled hen...
205
00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:55,277
Could I get some information?
206
00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:57,435
Well, quick as a slow
Rabbit chasing a...
207
00:08:57,504 --> 00:08:58,436
Please, please.
208
00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:00,071
Oh, sure.
209
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:01,140
Uh, mr. Drucker.
210
00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:02,685
Do you have some wallpapers?
211
00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:04,643
Oh, I got a sample
Book right here.
212
00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:07,289
And, now, what'd
You want to know?
213
00:09:07,313 --> 00:09:08,992
How can I get my tractor fixed?
214
00:09:09,016 --> 00:09:09,948
What kind is it?
215
00:09:10,017 --> 00:09:10,949
Hoyt clagwell.
216
00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:12,216
Heh heh.
217
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:13,285
Heh heh.
218
00:09:14,621 --> 00:09:15,621
Oh, oh, excuse me.
219
00:09:15,689 --> 00:09:17,488
I haven't heard
That name in 40 years,
220
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:19,423
Since hoyt busted
Up with clagwell.
221
00:09:19,492 --> 00:09:22,460
You see, mrs. Clagwell
Couldn't get along with mrs. Hoyt.
222
00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:23,461
So the 2 fellers...
223
00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:24,974
I... Look, I just want
To get some parts
224
00:09:24,998 --> 00:09:25,930
For my tractor.
225
00:09:25,999 --> 00:09:28,177
I don't want the family history.
226
00:09:28,201 --> 00:09:29,267
Look, darling.
227
00:09:29,335 --> 00:09:30,579
Winter's dream. Oh.
228
00:09:30,603 --> 00:09:31,803
Oh, no. No.
229
00:09:31,872 --> 00:09:33,304
That's paradise lost.
230
00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:35,073
This here is winter's dream.
231
00:09:35,142 --> 00:09:36,074
No, no.
232
00:09:36,143 --> 00:09:38,543
That is camels
At the water hole.
233
00:09:38,611 --> 00:09:40,879
Hey, what's this?
234
00:09:40,947 --> 00:09:42,080
Oh, this is an eye chart.
235
00:09:42,149 --> 00:09:43,948
I use this for
Giving driving tests.
236
00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:47,418
Mr. Haney called this
Doctor's waiting room.
237
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:48,619
Haney.
238
00:09:48,689 --> 00:09:50,521
Has he been trying to
Sell you this wallpaper?
239
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,522
Yes.
240
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:52,523
Well, doggone him.
241
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,125
I've got the exclusive
Selling rights
242
00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:55,694
On this line in the valley.
243
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,974
Mr. Drucker, about
My hoyt clagwell.
244
00:09:57,998 --> 00:09:59,164
Oh, yeah.
245
00:09:59,232 --> 00:10:01,599
When mr. Hoyt busted
Up with mr. Clagwell
246
00:10:01,668 --> 00:10:03,534
On account of their
Wives couldn't get along...
247
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:04,535
I just want to know
248
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:05,915
Where I can get it fixed!
249
00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:08,073
Well, that's what
I'm trying to tell you.
250
00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:09,841
After hoyt and clagwell split up
251
00:10:09,910 --> 00:10:11,387
Because their wives
Couldn't get along,
252
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:13,144
Hoyt went into the
Wax fruit business.
253
00:10:14,715 --> 00:10:17,682
He made the realest looking
Persimmons you've ever seen
254
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:19,395
And clagwell... Mr. Drucker,
255
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:21,920
Where can I get
My tractor fixed?
256
00:10:21,988 --> 00:10:23,788
Darling, if you
Stopped interrupting
257
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:25,790
Mr. Drucker, he'll tell you.
258
00:10:25,859 --> 00:10:27,125
Thank you.
259
00:10:27,194 --> 00:10:30,061
Like I said, hoyt went
Into the wax fruit business
260
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,163
And clagwell went
Over to the county seat.
261
00:10:32,232 --> 00:10:34,232
I got one of his cards
Here somewheres.
262
00:10:35,902 --> 00:10:36,902
Whoo.
263
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:39,871
Oh, sue ann bedlington.
264
00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:42,073
If you ever need a good
Blacksmith, she's great.
265
00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:45,210
There's a coincidence.
Tony webster.
266
00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,378
He used to do all of
Hoyt's persimmon paintings.
267
00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:49,848
Hey, how 'bout this?
268
00:10:49,916 --> 00:10:51,783
Here's a letter for
You and mrs. Douglas.
269
00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:53,395
Oliver: oh, uh, may we have it?
270
00:10:53,419 --> 00:10:54,986
Ooh. Just a second.
271
00:10:55,055 --> 00:10:56,788
I like to keep things official.
272
00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:58,156
Thank you.
273
00:10:58,225 --> 00:10:59,535
Oh, darling, it's from mother.
274
00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:01,637
Why didn't you deliver this?
275
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:02,739
Is that an official inquiry?
276
00:11:02,763 --> 00:11:03,763
Yes.
277
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:07,866
Well, sir, this is a
Class d1 post office,
278
00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:09,433
And that means
It's part post office
279
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:10,802
And part general store.
280
00:11:10,871 --> 00:11:12,270
And a class d1 don't have
281
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:14,005
To deliver mail or groceries.
282
00:11:14,074 --> 00:11:15,173
Any other questions?
283
00:11:15,242 --> 00:11:16,174
No, no.
284
00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:18,203
Oliver, mother
Sent our furniture.
285
00:11:18,245 --> 00:11:19,177
When is it supposed to get here?
286
00:11:19,246 --> 00:11:20,178
Wednesday.
287
00:11:20,247 --> 00:11:21,323
That's today.
288
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:24,149
Well, shouldn't we be
Home when it arrives?
289
00:11:24,217 --> 00:11:26,151
Darling, do you realize
290
00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:27,152
What you just said?
291
00:11:27,220 --> 00:11:28,153
You said shouldn't we be home?
292
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,598
That's the first
Time you've called
293
00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:32,001
Our place home
Since we've been here.
294
00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:32,957
Did I say that?
295
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,937
Yes, you did. Say it again.
296
00:11:34,961 --> 00:11:35,961
Let's go home.
297
00:11:36,963 --> 00:11:38,362
Oh, doggone it.
298
00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:41,499
You two remind me of a
Pair of lovesick cuckoos
299
00:11:41,567 --> 00:11:43,835
Flying over a load
Of monday wash.
300
00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:48,273
Hello?
301
00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:49,341
Hello, operator.
302
00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:51,009
I want the haney place.
303
00:11:51,077 --> 00:11:53,077
I want to talk to... Ohh!
304
00:11:55,782 --> 00:11:56,881
Hello?
305
00:11:56,950 --> 00:11:59,017
Why aren't you here at
The station to meet me?
306
00:11:59,085 --> 00:12:00,451
Didn't you get my telegram?
307
00:12:01,754 --> 00:12:02,787
Uh, who is that?
308
00:12:02,856 --> 00:12:04,522
It's mother!
309
00:12:04,590 --> 00:12:05,857
Ma?
310
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:07,966
Well, sure don't
Sound like you, ma.
311
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:11,196
Well, it doesn't
Sound like you, either.
312
00:12:11,264 --> 00:12:12,197
Who is this?
313
00:12:12,265 --> 00:12:13,464
Who is this?
314
00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:15,766
I want to speak
To oliver douglas.
315
00:12:15,836 --> 00:12:17,446
Oh, well, he don't live here.
316
00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:19,070
Well, isn't this
The haney place?
317
00:12:19,139 --> 00:12:20,538
That's right.
318
00:12:20,606 --> 00:12:21,606
Well, where is oliver?
319
00:12:21,674 --> 00:12:23,394
Uh, he's at the haney place.
320
00:12:24,644 --> 00:12:27,912
But I thought you just said
This was the haney place.
321
00:12:27,981 --> 00:12:30,181
Well, this is the
New haney place.
322
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:33,151
Now, what you want
Is the old haney place.
323
00:12:33,220 --> 00:12:36,254
You see, I used to live
At the old haney place,
324
00:12:36,323 --> 00:12:37,989
But I sold it to your son.
325
00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:40,624
Oh, you worthless, no-good...
326
00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:47,298
It's been nice
Talking to you, too.
327
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:50,534
Hello.
328
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:51,802
Hello, operator.
329
00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:53,071
You gave me the wrong number.
330
00:12:53,139 --> 00:12:56,574
I want the old haney place.
331
00:12:56,642 --> 00:12:58,343
They don't have a phone?
332
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:17,406
Excuse me. Could
I get at the phone?
333
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:18,997
Oh, I'm sorry.
334
00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:26,804
Just a moment.
335
00:13:26,873 --> 00:13:28,739
I believe that's my dime.
336
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,808
Can you identify it?
337
00:13:30,877 --> 00:13:33,144
Well, no.
338
00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:35,246
You've got to have a
Stronger case than that.
339
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,181
You one of them lady drummers?
340
00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:38,582
Am I a what?
341
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,751
Lady traveling salesman.
342
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,620
No. I am not.
343
00:13:42,688 --> 00:13:43,832
Ah, I guess you're
A little too old
344
00:13:43,856 --> 00:13:45,556
For that sort of thing.
345
00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:47,392
I beg your pardon!
346
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:49,127
Oh, that's all right.
347
00:13:49,195 --> 00:13:50,594
Just a second.
348
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,663
I wonder if you could help me?
349
00:13:52,732 --> 00:13:53,965
Oh, I don't think so.
350
00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:56,267
I'm trying to get
To the haney place.
351
00:13:56,336 --> 00:13:57,346
Old one or the new one?
352
00:13:57,370 --> 00:13:58,303
The old one.
353
00:13:58,371 --> 00:13:59,415
Oh, that's the one
That the douglases
354
00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:01,239
Got suckered into buying.
355
00:14:01,308 --> 00:14:02,885
You know, she's real nice.
356
00:14:02,909 --> 00:14:05,209
He's kind of strange.
357
00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:07,611
He is my son.
358
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:10,982
Oh, well, I guess
That accounts for it.
359
00:14:11,051 --> 00:14:12,061
Uh, can I give you a lift?
360
00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:14,052
Oh, that would be wonderful!
361
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,332
I got a car right
Around the corner, here.
362
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,722
Oh, uh, what about my bags?
363
00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:20,925
Oh, uh...
364
00:14:20,994 --> 00:14:22,393
I wouldn't leave them there.
365
00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:32,070
The couch goes in the kitchen.
366
00:14:32,138 --> 00:14:33,482
And the refrigerator
Goes right here.
367
00:14:33,506 --> 00:14:34,638
No, darling.
368
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,640
We're not putting the
Couch in the kitchen.
369
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,109
It goes in here.
370
00:14:38,178 --> 00:14:40,178
And the refrigerator
Goes in the kitchen.
371
00:14:40,246 --> 00:14:41,579
And the dishwasher?
372
00:14:41,647 --> 00:14:42,847
Yes.
373
00:14:42,915 --> 00:14:44,315
Well.
374
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,064
Got the whole thing solved.
375
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:48,619
We're going to put the
Stove in the bedroom.
376
00:14:51,824 --> 00:14:53,436
Everything is going
To fit perfectly.
377
00:14:53,460 --> 00:14:54,837
It's going to be beautiful.
378
00:14:54,861 --> 00:14:55,861
If it ever gets here.
379
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:56,961
It will.
380
00:14:57,030 --> 00:14:58,590
It's getting late. I
Wonder where it is?
381
00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:01,065
Furniture for me?
382
00:15:01,134 --> 00:15:02,244
Well, this is the
Haney place, isn't it?
383
00:15:02,268 --> 00:15:03,368
That's right.
384
00:15:03,436 --> 00:15:04,580
Well, the lady that
Sent it said to be sure
385
00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:05,803
To tell you good luck.
386
00:15:05,872 --> 00:15:08,539
Well, wasn't that nice of her.
387
00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:09,840
Is it all paid for?
388
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,042
Oh, sure.
389
00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:12,043
No charges?
390
00:15:12,112 --> 00:15:13,044
Nope.
391
00:15:13,113 --> 00:15:14,113
Bring it in.
392
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:19,050
Well, I wonder which one
393
00:15:19,119 --> 00:15:21,886
Of my feminine
Admirers sent me this?
394
00:15:30,446 --> 00:15:32,513
What are you stopping for?
395
00:15:32,581 --> 00:15:33,680
To get my breath.
396
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:38,785
When you said car, I thought
You meant automobile.
397
00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:41,688
If I'd a had an automobile,
I'd a said automobile.
398
00:15:41,757 --> 00:15:42,856
Keep pumping.
399
00:15:42,925 --> 00:15:44,958
Why do I have to pump?
400
00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:47,161
Somebody has to steer.
401
00:15:47,230 --> 00:15:49,430
Why can't I steer?
402
00:15:49,499 --> 00:15:50,864
You got a handcar license?
403
00:15:52,001 --> 00:15:53,367
No. Of course not.
404
00:15:53,436 --> 00:15:54,735
Keep pumping.
405
00:16:01,077 --> 00:16:02,554
Good morning, mr. Drucker.
406
00:16:02,578 --> 00:16:03,710
Oh, morning, mr. Douglas.
407
00:16:03,779 --> 00:16:05,179
Did your furniture get here yet?
408
00:16:05,248 --> 00:16:07,515
No. Not yet. My
Wife is all upset.
409
00:16:07,583 --> 00:16:08,927
I want to call my
Mother in new york
410
00:16:08,951 --> 00:16:10,329
And find out exactly
When they promised
411
00:16:10,353 --> 00:16:11,353
To deliver it.
412
00:16:11,421 --> 00:16:12,498
Could I use your phone?
413
00:16:12,522 --> 00:16:14,242
I-I really don't think
You ought to do that.
414
00:16:14,290 --> 00:16:15,467
Oh, I intend to pay you.
415
00:16:15,491 --> 00:16:16,790
Oh, it isn't that, mr. Douglas.
416
00:16:16,859 --> 00:16:19,093
It's just that I better put
The call through for you.
417
00:16:19,162 --> 00:16:21,395
Any long distance call
Farther than pixley,
418
00:16:21,464 --> 00:16:22,896
And sarah goes all to pieces.
419
00:16:22,965 --> 00:16:24,165
Uh-huh.
420
00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:26,033
Hello, uh, sarah?
421
00:16:26,102 --> 00:16:29,070
Sam. Are you sitting down?
422
00:16:29,138 --> 00:16:30,471
Well, you better.
423
00:16:30,540 --> 00:16:33,407
Now, get a firm
Grip on your plugs.
424
00:16:33,476 --> 00:16:36,810
I got a long distance
Call to new york.
425
00:16:36,879 --> 00:16:37,945
Hello?
426
00:16:38,013 --> 00:16:39,646
Sarah?
427
00:16:39,715 --> 00:16:41,382
She'll come to in a minute.
428
00:16:41,451 --> 00:16:42,383
Hello?
429
00:16:42,452 --> 00:16:43,750
Hello?
430
00:16:43,819 --> 00:16:44,751
Uh, pardon me, mack,
431
00:16:44,820 --> 00:16:45,964
Is there a good
Mechanic around here?
432
00:16:45,988 --> 00:16:48,155
Mechanic? Uh, well,
I really don't know.
433
00:16:48,224 --> 00:16:49,723
Ask mr. Drucker, here.
434
00:16:49,792 --> 00:16:50,902
My moving van broke down.
435
00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:52,003
It's a lucky thing it happened
436
00:16:52,027 --> 00:16:53,439
After we delivered
The furniture.
437
00:16:53,463 --> 00:16:55,062
The furniture?
438
00:16:55,131 --> 00:16:56,708
Yeah. We brought a
Load out from new york.
439
00:16:56,732 --> 00:16:57,732
New york!
440
00:16:58,767 --> 00:17:00,045
Was there a leopard-skin couch
441
00:17:00,069 --> 00:17:02,169
And a glass table
With red chairs?
442
00:17:02,238 --> 00:17:03,348
Yeah. That's the stuff.
443
00:17:03,372 --> 00:17:05,038
Ah, at last!
444
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:08,209
Hello. Sarah?
445
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:10,944
You better cancel
That new york call.
446
00:17:11,013 --> 00:17:12,513
No, no, now, don't cry.
447
00:17:12,582 --> 00:17:14,381
He'll make another one someday.
448
00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:23,690
For crying out loud.
449
00:17:23,759 --> 00:17:25,192
Lisa, open the door.
450
00:17:25,261 --> 00:17:27,595
Right away.
451
00:17:27,663 --> 00:17:29,341
How does it look? Does it fit?
452
00:17:29,365 --> 00:17:30,365
Where is it?
453
00:17:30,399 --> 00:17:31,332
Where is what?
454
00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:32,400
The furniture!
455
00:17:32,435 --> 00:17:33,367
Well, where is it?
456
00:17:33,436 --> 00:17:36,003
It's here! Where?
457
00:17:36,071 --> 00:17:37,382
Well, I just talked
To the moving man
458
00:17:37,406 --> 00:17:39,585
At mr. Drucker's store.
He said he delivered it.
459
00:17:41,076 --> 00:17:42,076
Who is this?
460
00:17:44,547 --> 00:17:45,857
You looking for this?
461
00:17:45,881 --> 00:17:46,913
No, I got...
462
00:17:46,982 --> 00:17:48,582
I just dropped by.
463
00:17:48,651 --> 00:17:51,652
I wondered if you
Made any decisions
464
00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:53,298
About the wallpaper.
465
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,699
We're not interested
In wallpaper.
466
00:17:54,723 --> 00:17:56,101
We're interested in furniture.
467
00:17:56,125 --> 00:17:58,992
Mr. Douglas, this
Is your lucky day.
468
00:17:59,061 --> 00:18:02,729
I got some furniture that
Was just made for this place.
469
00:18:02,798 --> 00:18:05,132
An unknown lady
Friend sent it to me.
470
00:18:05,201 --> 00:18:06,978
I told you I am not going to buy
471
00:18:07,002 --> 00:18:08,636
Anything else from you.
472
00:18:08,704 --> 00:18:10,103
It's a shame. It
Fits beautifully.
473
00:18:10,173 --> 00:18:11,438
No.
474
00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:15,776
Nice, leopard-skin couch,
Red velvet chairs, glass table.
475
00:18:15,844 --> 00:18:17,884
Don't you understand
Simple english?
476
00:18:17,946 --> 00:18:20,181
I don't want a
Leopard-skin couch
477
00:18:20,249 --> 00:18:21,993
And red velvet chairs
And a glass table and...
478
00:18:22,017 --> 00:18:24,084
That's our furniture!
479
00:18:24,153 --> 00:18:25,085
Yours?
480
00:18:25,154 --> 00:18:26,898
Yes. How did you get it?
481
00:18:26,922 --> 00:18:29,056
Well, this fella come
To the door and...
482
00:18:29,124 --> 00:18:31,692
I don't care how
You got it, I want it.
483
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:33,194
Well, I don't want
To keep anything
484
00:18:33,262 --> 00:18:35,462
That don't rightly belong to me.
485
00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:37,798
Just send your truck
Over for it and you can...
486
00:18:37,866 --> 00:18:39,667
I haven't got a truck!
487
00:18:39,735 --> 00:18:42,135
Oh?
488
00:18:42,205 --> 00:18:43,870
I got a truck.
489
00:18:43,939 --> 00:18:47,541
Let's see. It'll take
About 4 trips at $6 a trip.
490
00:18:47,610 --> 00:18:49,610
Plus storage charges.
491
00:18:49,679 --> 00:18:50,911
Get it!
492
00:18:57,920 --> 00:18:59,953
Hold it. This is
As far as we go.
493
00:19:03,859 --> 00:19:05,626
Get off here.
494
00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:09,774
Well, you might give me a hand.
495
00:19:09,798 --> 00:19:11,432
Oh.
496
00:19:16,539 --> 00:19:19,740
And remember, you take
The path straight across...
497
00:19:19,808 --> 00:19:23,844
Mr. Carson, I have
Been on african safaris,
498
00:19:23,912 --> 00:19:26,113
Mountain climbing
Trips in switzerland,
499
00:19:26,181 --> 00:19:28,716
And I have floated
Down the amazon.
500
00:19:28,784 --> 00:19:30,495
Yeah. But you ain't crossed
Newt kiley's pasture
501
00:19:30,519 --> 00:19:32,085
With a mad bull chasing you.
502
00:19:32,154 --> 00:19:33,554
Now, remember,
You bear to the right
503
00:19:33,623 --> 00:19:34,921
Till you come to the forest.
504
00:19:34,990 --> 00:19:37,924
Thank you. You've been
A perfect gentleman.
505
00:19:37,993 --> 00:19:39,192
Yeah. So have you.
506
00:19:44,066 --> 00:19:45,098
Oh!
507
00:19:52,174 --> 00:19:54,174
Here's the first
Load, mr. Douglas.
508
00:19:54,243 --> 00:19:56,243
Lisa! Our furniture's here!
509
00:19:56,312 --> 00:19:58,111
I'm sorry this happened.
510
00:19:58,180 --> 00:20:00,281
Oh, I'll bet you are.
511
00:20:00,349 --> 00:20:02,316
Well, it was an honest mistake.
512
00:20:02,385 --> 00:20:04,425
These fellas got
The new haney place
513
00:20:04,453 --> 00:20:06,754
And the old haney
Place mixed up.
514
00:20:06,822 --> 00:20:09,156
Second time it happened today.
515
00:20:09,224 --> 00:20:11,191
You mean you got
Something else meant for me?
516
00:20:11,260 --> 00:20:13,860
Uh, just a phone call
From your mother.
517
00:20:13,929 --> 00:20:15,095
My mother!
518
00:20:15,164 --> 00:20:16,408
Yeah. She called this morning
519
00:20:16,432 --> 00:20:17,909
From the hooterville station.
520
00:20:17,933 --> 00:20:19,767
Well, what did she say?
521
00:20:19,835 --> 00:20:22,670
I wouldn't care to repeat it.
522
00:20:22,738 --> 00:20:25,071
Why didn't you tell
Me that this morning?
523
00:20:25,140 --> 00:20:26,307
Well, I was busy.
524
00:20:26,375 --> 00:20:29,209
These fellas was moving
Furniture into my house.
525
00:20:29,278 --> 00:20:31,378
Darling, did you know
That mother was coming?
526
00:20:31,447 --> 00:20:32,946
No.
527
00:20:33,015 --> 00:20:34,559
She should have sent a
Telegram or something.
528
00:20:34,583 --> 00:20:35,683
The poor darling.
529
00:20:35,751 --> 00:20:38,585
She must have been sitting
At the station all day.
530
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:40,098
Uh, you want me to go get her?
531
00:20:40,122 --> 00:20:43,056
It'll only cost you 75 cents.
532
00:20:43,125 --> 00:20:44,692
No.
533
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:45,970
Lisa, you go and pick up mother.
534
00:20:45,994 --> 00:20:47,060
Get eb to drive you.
535
00:20:47,129 --> 00:20:48,829
I'll help mr. Haney
Unload the furniture.
536
00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:51,532
Mother!
537
00:20:53,569 --> 00:20:54,569
Did you find her?
538
00:20:54,637 --> 00:20:55,637
No.
539
00:20:55,705 --> 00:20:57,338
Mrs. Mother!
540
00:20:57,406 --> 00:20:59,340
Mrs. Mother!
541
00:20:59,408 --> 00:21:00,341
She isn't here.
542
00:21:00,409 --> 00:21:01,742
No.
543
00:21:01,811 --> 00:21:04,211
Strange. I wonder
Where she could be?
544
00:21:20,329 --> 00:21:22,095
Now, see here.
545
00:21:22,164 --> 00:21:24,631
Don't you think you
Can intimidate me.
546
00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,767
Go on! Scat!
547
00:21:39,849 --> 00:21:40,781
Where's mother?
548
00:21:40,850 --> 00:21:41,948
I don't know.
549
00:21:42,017 --> 00:21:43,194
We looked all over hootersville
550
00:21:43,218 --> 00:21:44,496
And we couldn't find her.
551
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:45,753
Oh.
552
00:21:45,821 --> 00:21:46,754
Well, if I know my mother,
553
00:21:46,822 --> 00:21:48,032
She probably got
Back on the train
554
00:21:48,056 --> 00:21:50,491
And went back to new york.
555
00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:52,437
Darling, don't you think
We should look for her?
556
00:21:52,461 --> 00:21:54,060
Oh, no. Don't worry
About mother.
557
00:21:54,129 --> 00:21:55,796
She knows how to
Take care of herself.
558
00:21:55,865 --> 00:21:58,432
Come on. I want to
Show you something.
559
00:21:58,501 --> 00:21:59,600
I put all the furniture in.
560
00:21:59,668 --> 00:22:00,601
You have? Yeah.
561
00:22:00,669 --> 00:22:02,302
Close your eyes.
562
00:22:06,975 --> 00:22:08,709
All right. Open your eyes.
563
00:22:15,384 --> 00:22:17,584
Open your eyes!
564
00:22:17,653 --> 00:22:19,364
It looks better
With them closed.
565
00:22:19,388 --> 00:22:21,688
Well, it's not perfect.
566
00:22:21,757 --> 00:22:23,189
It needs a little rearranging.
567
00:22:23,258 --> 00:22:24,669
Oliver, don't you think...
568
00:22:24,693 --> 00:22:26,593
The kitchen. Wait till
You see the kitchen.
569
00:22:37,873 --> 00:22:39,372
Well?
570
00:22:39,442 --> 00:22:41,007
What do you think?
571
00:22:41,076 --> 00:22:43,844
If I tell you, you'll
Only get mad.
572
00:22:43,913 --> 00:22:45,513
I just stuck everything
Around, you know.
573
00:22:45,581 --> 00:22:47,659
Just to give you an idea of
What it's going to look like.
574
00:22:47,683 --> 00:22:49,282
It gave me an idea.
575
00:22:49,351 --> 00:22:51,195
Let's go back to new york.
576
00:22:51,219 --> 00:22:53,153
Now, lisa.
577
00:22:53,221 --> 00:22:54,499
What is this doing here?
578
00:22:54,523 --> 00:22:55,656
Oh.
579
00:22:55,724 --> 00:22:57,624
Well, I thought, in case
You got tired cooking,
580
00:22:57,693 --> 00:23:00,761
You might like to lie down.
581
00:23:00,830 --> 00:23:02,774
This goes into the bedroom.
582
00:23:02,798 --> 00:23:03,964
The bedroom?
583
00:23:04,032 --> 00:23:05,766
I almost forgot.
Come on. Come on.
584
00:23:05,835 --> 00:23:06,867
Wait till you see this.
585
00:23:08,571 --> 00:23:09,981
This will make you feel better.
586
00:23:10,005 --> 00:23:12,405
No more sleeping
On mr. Haney's cots.
587
00:23:17,379 --> 00:23:18,946
How about this?
588
00:23:23,586 --> 00:23:25,251
Oh, there's plenty of room!
589
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:28,254
Well, how do I
Get to my dresses?
590
00:23:28,323 --> 00:23:31,424
Follow me.
591
00:23:31,494 --> 00:23:32,960
If you please.
592
00:23:35,197 --> 00:23:36,396
Here they are.
593
00:23:36,465 --> 00:23:37,664
Easy. Eh?
594
00:23:37,733 --> 00:23:38,899
Where are my trunks?
595
00:23:38,968 --> 00:23:40,011
In the bathroom.
596
00:23:40,035 --> 00:23:41,580
But where are the
Clothes which were in it?
597
00:23:41,604 --> 00:23:43,804
In the closet.
598
00:23:43,873 --> 00:23:46,473
How do I get them out?
599
00:23:46,542 --> 00:23:48,375
Open the closet door.
600
00:23:54,650 --> 00:23:56,249
Aah!
601
00:23:56,318 --> 00:23:57,450
Oliver!
602
00:23:57,520 --> 00:24:00,387
Oh, I'm sorry! I'm sorry.
603
00:24:00,455 --> 00:24:01,555
Did I, uh...
604
00:24:06,061 --> 00:24:07,160
What was that?
605
00:24:11,734 --> 00:24:14,535
Eb!
606
00:24:14,603 --> 00:24:15,702
Yes, sir.
607
00:24:15,771 --> 00:24:17,370
What's that racket?
608
00:24:17,439 --> 00:24:19,940
Oh, that's newt kiley's bull.
609
00:24:20,009 --> 00:24:21,119
Sounds like he found himself
610
00:24:21,143 --> 00:24:22,308
A new girlfriend.
611
00:24:22,377 --> 00:24:23,788
You go away, you nasty beast,
612
00:24:23,812 --> 00:24:25,423
Or I'll give your
Name to my butcher!
613
00:24:27,382 --> 00:24:30,684
Lisa, do you know
What that bull is saying
614
00:24:30,753 --> 00:24:31,785
To his girlfriend?
615
00:24:33,856 --> 00:24:35,288
No. What?
616
00:24:35,357 --> 00:24:38,091
He's saying, "You're as
Pretty as a little steep wagon
617
00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:40,293
Going down a red hill
Pushing a purple speckled hen
618
00:24:40,362 --> 00:24:42,395
Through a load of wash."
619
00:24:42,464 --> 00:24:45,365
That doesn't make any sense.
620
00:24:45,434 --> 00:24:46,934
Love never does.
621
00:24:50,138 --> 00:24:52,305
Moo!
622
00:24:59,615 --> 00:25:02,549
Captioning made possible
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623
00:25:02,618 --> 00:25:05,738
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