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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,940 --> 00:00:09,120 I'm an open book with pages left to write. 2 00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:16,079 I can't wait to see what's inside. This is the new story of my life. 3 00:00:22,340 --> 00:00:26,380 Hey, Skye, check out this picture of Jude Logg jogging with his shirt off. 4 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,820 You know what? He's just not my type. I could never date a guy with better 5 00:00:29,820 --> 00:00:30,820 eyelashes than me. 6 00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:36,030 He is the most gorgeous man on earth, and he keeps getting more gorgeous. 7 00:00:36,250 --> 00:00:39,050 Every time I think he's the most gorgeous a person can be, he outdoes 8 00:00:39,150 --> 00:00:42,950 But no, I am pretty sure this picture is the most gorgeous someone can be. 9 00:00:44,130 --> 00:00:45,130 He did it again. 10 00:00:47,030 --> 00:00:48,310 Hey, Kat, can I get a cup of coffee? 11 00:00:48,610 --> 00:00:50,010 Of course you can. It's right over there. 12 00:00:51,890 --> 00:00:53,030 Thank you. Very helpful. 13 00:00:53,450 --> 00:00:54,830 You're welcome. Tip jar's right there. 14 00:00:57,470 --> 00:00:58,470 Ow! Ow! 15 00:00:59,130 --> 00:01:00,130 Ow! Ow! 16 00:01:07,320 --> 00:01:08,320 Always helpful. 17 00:01:09,140 --> 00:01:10,980 Again, talk is cheap. Tip jar. 18 00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:16,380 Oh, hey. Oh, nice sweater, Harold. It's hideous. 19 00:01:17,780 --> 00:01:21,580 Well, then why are you wearing it? My daughter's visiting today, and I wanted 20 00:01:21,580 --> 00:01:24,520 pick. I like all the Father's Day gifts she got me. 21 00:01:24,900 --> 00:01:26,620 Hey, the sweater. Zoe coming today? 22 00:01:26,980 --> 00:01:29,860 I didn't know you had a daughter. 23 00:01:30,100 --> 00:01:33,760 Oh, we haven't seen much of each other recently. Things have been a little 24 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:34,738 between us. 25 00:01:34,740 --> 00:01:35,740 Aw. Oh, I'm sorry. 26 00:01:36,310 --> 00:01:40,030 What do you like? Oh, she's beautiful and intelligent. 27 00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:41,350 Extremely intelligent. 28 00:01:41,410 --> 00:01:45,190 She has a Ph .D. in applied botany. She actually led the team to discover the 29 00:01:45,190 --> 00:01:46,890 secret to growing vegetables in sand. 30 00:01:48,250 --> 00:01:49,950 I mean, think about it. 31 00:01:50,270 --> 00:01:51,330 Vegetables in sand. 32 00:01:51,590 --> 00:01:53,170 It's outrageous. 33 00:01:54,630 --> 00:01:58,210 You think that's cool? My brother can grow pot in his closet. 34 00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:06,820 Unfortunately, her intelligence goes out the window when it comes to choosing 35 00:02:06,820 --> 00:02:07,820 men. 36 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:12,140 Now she's dropping by to introduce me to who I'm sure will be her latest 37 00:02:12,140 --> 00:02:16,080 mistake. You know, you sound just like my dad. He never liked my boyfriend. 38 00:02:16,620 --> 00:02:18,540 It's just that she's an exceptional woman. 39 00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:20,640 She deserves an exceptional man. 40 00:02:21,060 --> 00:02:22,059 Well, take my advice. 41 00:02:22,060 --> 00:02:24,720 The more you say you hate him, the longer she'll stay with him to prove you 42 00:02:24,720 --> 00:02:26,740 wrong. Oh, I don't know about that. 43 00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:30,420 No, it's true. If my dad let me make my own mistakes, I probably wouldn't have 44 00:02:30,420 --> 00:02:31,339 made so many. 45 00:02:31,340 --> 00:02:32,760 Like that drug dealer you dated? 46 00:02:34,540 --> 00:02:35,540 Drug lord. 47 00:02:42,100 --> 00:02:43,180 Hello, Harold. 48 00:02:43,980 --> 00:02:44,980 Zoe. 49 00:02:47,660 --> 00:02:54,580 You expressed some interest in my work the last time we spoke, so I brought 50 00:02:54,580 --> 00:02:55,820 you a sand turnip. 51 00:02:57,580 --> 00:02:58,580 That's amazing. 52 00:02:59,450 --> 00:03:01,710 You know, you don't have to keep wearing that sweater. 53 00:03:02,030 --> 00:03:05,030 It wasn't in style when I got it for you ten years ago. 54 00:03:05,250 --> 00:03:09,370 Oh, thank God. It gives children seizures. 55 00:03:12,690 --> 00:03:14,610 So, this must be Zoe. 56 00:03:15,010 --> 00:03:17,470 Zoe, this is Skylar. Hi, nice to meet you. 57 00:03:17,690 --> 00:03:19,630 Gosh, you're every bit as pretty as Harold said. 58 00:03:20,270 --> 00:03:22,970 Yeah, I just don't see the family resemblance. 59 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:27,800 Oh, that's because I acquired a higher than usual number of dominant genes from 60 00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:28,920 my mother's genome. 61 00:03:29,740 --> 00:03:30,740 Okay, 62 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:33,200 now I see it. 63 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:40,380 Zoe! Oh, good. Well, this is Gary. Gary, this is Skylar. Hello. Nice to meet 64 00:03:40,380 --> 00:03:41,900 you. And, of course, my father. 65 00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:44,240 Wow. 66 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:47,000 Professor March, it is an honor. 67 00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:48,380 Oh, forget it. 68 00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:52,460 I hug Professor Harold March. 69 00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:56,140 Technically, you're still hugging Professor Harold March. 70 00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:02,140 Gary is a very affectionate person. That is one of the things that I love most 71 00:04:02,140 --> 00:04:03,059 about him. 72 00:04:03,060 --> 00:04:04,700 That and my dangerous criminal history. 73 00:04:06,460 --> 00:04:07,460 I'm kidding. 74 00:04:07,780 --> 00:04:09,460 It's my sense of humor that she loves. 75 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:11,840 I'm not a criminal anymore. 76 00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:14,920 Kidding again. I can't turn it off. 77 00:04:16,700 --> 00:04:18,320 It happens when he's nervous. 78 00:04:18,839 --> 00:04:19,959 Like at my murder trial. 79 00:04:21,930 --> 00:04:22,930 I'll stop now. 80 00:04:24,010 --> 00:04:25,950 Is that drug lord still single? 81 00:04:35,830 --> 00:04:36,830 Nice. 82 00:04:37,590 --> 00:04:40,550 So, Gary, what do you do? 83 00:04:41,130 --> 00:04:44,490 Well, I got my master's degree in psychology at Stanford, and now I do 84 00:04:47,830 --> 00:04:48,830 I'm not kidding. 85 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,020 Hypnotist? Really? 86 00:04:53,740 --> 00:04:55,980 Sorry, you make people cluck like a chicken. 87 00:04:57,020 --> 00:05:02,940 No, he's a hypnotherapist. He helps people quit smoking, lose weight, 88 00:05:02,940 --> 00:05:06,480 phobias. He is changing people's lives. 89 00:05:07,300 --> 00:05:09,740 But occasionally I make the really mean ones cluck like chickens. 90 00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:12,599 I'm kidding. 91 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:16,420 You know, a friend of mine used hypnotherapy to get over his fear of 92 00:05:16,820 --> 00:05:17,820 Did it work? 93 00:05:18,420 --> 00:05:19,420 Unfortunately, yes. 94 00:05:21,930 --> 00:05:26,770 Tell me, Gary, can you help people who consistently make bad choices? 95 00:05:27,230 --> 00:05:30,910 Or someone who's pig -headed so that they stop offending people? 96 00:05:32,490 --> 00:05:35,130 Or somebody who ignores the good advice of a friend? 97 00:05:36,450 --> 00:05:38,290 Oh, sure, I can help all those people, yeah. 98 00:05:40,210 --> 00:05:43,930 Well, that's quite impressive. 99 00:05:44,770 --> 00:05:48,130 And you have nice skin. 100 00:05:50,470 --> 00:05:51,470 Zoe! 101 00:05:55,690 --> 00:05:57,390 You're looking well. Yeah, so are you. 102 00:05:57,670 --> 00:06:01,990 Thanks for sending me those sand yams, by the way. You know, I canned them and 103 00:06:01,990 --> 00:06:03,150 made candied sand yams. 104 00:06:04,470 --> 00:06:06,910 I'd love to taste them. Oh, you can. I canned them. 105 00:06:08,270 --> 00:06:10,270 You can can candied sand yams? 106 00:06:10,910 --> 00:06:13,190 You can. You can can candied sand yams. 107 00:06:14,430 --> 00:06:16,430 This is the worst Dr. Seuss book ever. 108 00:06:18,190 --> 00:06:20,290 So, how's Charlotte? She's so great. 109 00:06:20,670 --> 00:06:22,170 Oh, didn't you hear we got divorced? 110 00:06:22,390 --> 00:06:23,390 Thank God. 111 00:06:24,549 --> 00:06:25,730 Why does everyone always say that? 112 00:06:26,650 --> 00:06:28,170 Let me introduce you to Gary. 113 00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:29,430 Oh. Gary. 114 00:06:30,730 --> 00:06:34,270 Gavin, this is Gary. He's a hypnotherapist. Hi. Oh, that's so cool. 115 00:06:35,110 --> 00:06:38,890 Wait, will you put me under? I've been dying to know what it's like. Oh, that's 116 00:06:38,890 --> 00:06:39,890 not really what I do. 117 00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:42,190 Oh, so you don't really know how to hypnotize people. 118 00:06:43,670 --> 00:06:44,549 No, I do. 119 00:06:44,550 --> 00:06:45,550 Oh, cool. Okay, great. 120 00:06:45,710 --> 00:06:48,210 Make me think I'm a monkey. No, that would be too embarrassing. 121 00:06:48,610 --> 00:06:49,690 No, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do it, do it. 122 00:06:51,820 --> 00:06:53,920 Okay, I'll try, but this is not the ideal environment for me. 123 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:55,680 Hawaii is. 124 00:06:57,580 --> 00:06:58,900 Hawaii. Good one. 125 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:01,360 I see you've already hypnotized him. 126 00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:07,500 Okay. What I'd like you to do is take a deep breath and listen to the sound of 127 00:07:07,500 --> 00:07:08,419 my voice. 128 00:07:08,420 --> 00:07:10,080 Oh, you hate him, right? 129 00:07:11,100 --> 00:07:12,100 Uh, 130 00:07:13,020 --> 00:07:14,020 no. 131 00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:16,380 Quite the opposite. 132 00:07:16,860 --> 00:07:21,200 Really? I've liked him ever since that long, lingering hug failed to make me 133 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:22,340 excruciatingly uncomfortable. 134 00:07:24,780 --> 00:07:28,780 Wow, I must say, I'm touched by your enthusiasm. 135 00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:32,420 Where are you going? 136 00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:36,340 Oh, to put more money in the meter. I thought that you would have offended 137 00:07:36,340 --> 00:07:37,720 and we would have left by now. 138 00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:42,300 Three, two, one. 139 00:07:44,300 --> 00:07:45,960 All right, what should we have her do? 140 00:07:47,060 --> 00:07:48,120 Make her talk like a vampire. 141 00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:52,440 Make her think it's Thanksgiving and her head's made of cranberries. 142 00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:55,059 No, no, no. 143 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:58,780 Make her think she's a pimp and she drinks out of a goblet and she says 144 00:07:58,780 --> 00:08:00,920 like, Hey, bitch, give me my money! 145 00:08:03,260 --> 00:08:04,600 I got it, I got it, I got it. 146 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:06,380 Make her think she has no butt. 147 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:08,800 What's funny about that? 148 00:08:09,340 --> 00:08:10,620 If she has no butt, she can't sit down. 149 00:08:12,500 --> 00:08:13,800 Well, what's there instead of her butt? 150 00:08:14,300 --> 00:08:15,300 Uh, nothing. 151 00:08:16,620 --> 00:08:18,820 Well, that's weird. So her legs just go right into her back? 152 00:08:19,860 --> 00:08:20,860 Does it bend there? 153 00:08:21,380 --> 00:08:22,380 I don't know. Yeah. 154 00:08:22,740 --> 00:08:24,460 Well, then she can sit down. 155 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:27,580 Well, it's better than talking like a vampire pimp. 156 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,980 Oh, oh, oh. I know what. I know what. I know what. Okay. 157 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:33,240 This is good. 158 00:08:33,860 --> 00:08:38,580 Get her to think that Stuart is Jude Law. She loves Jude Law. Okay. That's 159 00:08:39,260 --> 00:08:42,080 Kath, I'm going to snap my fingers. And when I do... 160 00:08:42,330 --> 00:08:45,970 You will wake and you will realize that the man in the bowling shirt is Jude 161 00:08:45,970 --> 00:08:50,050 Law. Yeah, yeah, and he's hiding here to research a role as a bookseller. 162 00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:53,350 And he doesn't want anyone to know he's here, so he's going by the name of 163 00:08:53,350 --> 00:08:54,610 Stuart. Anything else? 164 00:08:54,830 --> 00:08:56,070 And she has no butt. 165 00:08:58,470 --> 00:09:00,830 And three, two, one. 166 00:09:04,090 --> 00:09:05,910 What's going on? Nothing. Nothing? 167 00:09:41,550 --> 00:09:42,550 Can I get you anything? 168 00:09:43,710 --> 00:09:44,750 Sure. Coffee? 169 00:09:45,470 --> 00:09:47,130 Okay. I'm coming right up. 170 00:09:47,550 --> 00:09:48,690 You were great, Melfi. 171 00:09:49,770 --> 00:09:51,850 Thank you. I was worried I came off a little gay. 172 00:09:54,170 --> 00:10:01,070 I'm so 173 00:10:01,070 --> 00:10:02,450 impressed. You're really talented. 174 00:10:03,130 --> 00:10:05,070 Hey, could you hypnotize me into not like chocolate? 175 00:10:06,090 --> 00:10:07,870 Absolutely. Is that your weakness? 176 00:10:08,370 --> 00:10:09,370 Totally. 177 00:10:09,530 --> 00:10:10,650 And I'd be happy to do you. 178 00:10:14,700 --> 00:10:16,700 I've been thinking about doing you since the moment I walked in here. 179 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:20,240 That's the way you say you're kidding. 180 00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:22,960 I'm kidding. 181 00:10:23,860 --> 00:10:25,420 But I'm not. 182 00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:28,260 But now you are. 183 00:10:29,260 --> 00:10:30,260 Maybe. I don't know. 184 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,960 And what are you two up to? 185 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,300 No good. I can tell you that much. 186 00:10:38,420 --> 00:10:39,420 I'm kidding. 187 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:43,880 Sorry. 188 00:10:44,030 --> 00:10:45,370 Madison Peeper! 189 00:10:55,750 --> 00:10:59,970 Here you go. Come again. 190 00:11:01,390 --> 00:11:02,390 Hi. 191 00:11:03,850 --> 00:11:04,850 Hi. 192 00:11:05,850 --> 00:11:06,850 Hi. 193 00:11:08,410 --> 00:11:11,730 Can we not say hi ten times before every conversation? 194 00:11:12,130 --> 00:11:15,680 Sorry. You've got the most beautiful face I've ever seen. 195 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:17,500 I just want to lick it. 196 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:19,880 Okay. 197 00:11:20,460 --> 00:11:21,780 I can't do this anymore. 198 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:23,560 I'm not Jude Law. 199 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:25,240 Right. 200 00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:28,160 No, no, seriously. It's me. 201 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:30,400 It's Stuart. 202 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,000 It's me. I'm Stuart. 203 00:11:32,740 --> 00:11:33,740 I'm Stuart. 204 00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:36,360 I'm Stuart. Come on. Let's go. 205 00:11:37,380 --> 00:11:38,980 I know. I feel like I'm dreaming. 206 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:40,900 Would you pinch me? 207 00:11:41,819 --> 00:11:42,819 I'll show you where. 208 00:11:45,460 --> 00:11:47,020 Oh, I knew we should have done the butt. 209 00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:51,160 I've got to talk to you. 210 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:53,160 What's up? 211 00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:54,900 That Gary guy just hit on me. 212 00:11:55,700 --> 00:11:56,800 Really? Yeah. 213 00:11:57,060 --> 00:12:00,100 I asked him if hypnosis could keep me from eating chocolate, and he said he 214 00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:01,960 would be happy to do me. 215 00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:05,560 Oh, he's probably talking about hypnosis. 216 00:12:06,260 --> 00:12:07,740 Are you sure he was coming on to you? 217 00:12:08,720 --> 00:12:09,720 Well... 218 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:11,780 because he always says he's kidding. 219 00:12:12,100 --> 00:12:14,540 But it's kind of hard to tell because nothing he ever said is funny. 220 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:19,100 Before you say anything to Harold, you better be 100 % sure he was hitting on 221 00:12:19,100 --> 00:12:21,360 you. Yeah, well, I mean, I guess you're right. 222 00:12:21,780 --> 00:12:24,620 Now, whatever you do, don't flirt with Gary, okay? That's probably why this 223 00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:26,020 whole thing started. You're very flirty. 224 00:12:27,560 --> 00:12:31,580 I am not flirty. Oh, please. You were totally flirting with me yesterday. 225 00:12:31,940 --> 00:12:34,180 Well, that was because I wanted the weekend off. 226 00:12:35,900 --> 00:12:39,660 Uh, by the way, have you made a decision on that? 227 00:12:41,230 --> 00:12:42,490 Yeah, take whatever you need. 228 00:12:43,810 --> 00:12:44,810 Thank you. 229 00:12:47,030 --> 00:12:49,430 Oh, hey, you guys are back. How was lunch? 230 00:12:50,430 --> 00:12:55,210 Delightful. Gary made an ethnic slur at the expense of our waiter. 231 00:12:57,670 --> 00:12:59,970 Fortunately, it turned out he was just kidding. 232 00:13:02,130 --> 00:13:07,550 Well, sorry I missed it. I must say, I am so touched by your acceptance of all 233 00:13:07,550 --> 00:13:09,440 this. I love you, Daddy. 234 00:13:09,740 --> 00:13:13,300 Oh, Zoe, I love you, too. 235 00:13:14,020 --> 00:13:16,660 I love you so much. 236 00:13:17,220 --> 00:13:21,240 Well, as long as I'm here, perhaps I'll grab a book. 237 00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:23,240 Not if it grabs you first. 238 00:13:23,860 --> 00:13:24,799 I'm kidding. 239 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:26,720 Can you imagine a book grabbing a person? It's absurd. 240 00:13:30,040 --> 00:13:32,040 Did you hear that, Skyler? 241 00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:33,980 She called me Daddy. 242 00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,520 She hasn't called me Daddy in years. 243 00:13:37,370 --> 00:13:41,450 Thank you so much if it weren't for your advice right now, we'd be in a huge 244 00:13:41,450 --> 00:13:44,410 fight. Oh, Harold, well, I'm glad I could help. 245 00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:50,550 Now, Gary. 246 00:13:51,050 --> 00:13:52,310 Oh, hi, Skylar. 247 00:13:52,550 --> 00:13:53,990 Just checking out the biographies. 248 00:13:54,650 --> 00:13:56,810 I like to keep abreast of titillating personalities. 249 00:13:59,870 --> 00:14:00,870 What? 250 00:14:01,170 --> 00:14:03,950 Nothing. I just like to bury my face in a couple of juicy volumes. 251 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:08,280 We need to talk. 252 00:14:13,540 --> 00:14:17,540 Listen, I never know if you're kidding or not, so I'm just going to ask you 253 00:14:17,540 --> 00:14:19,340 out. Are you hitting on me? 254 00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:20,760 Oh, yes. 255 00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:25,400 Well, that is just the sleaziest, stupidest thing I can't believe. 256 00:14:25,860 --> 00:14:27,700 I was so obviously kidding. 257 00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:30,560 You were? 258 00:14:30,660 --> 00:14:32,180 Yes. Oh, good. 259 00:14:32,780 --> 00:14:35,640 I'm sorry. I just thought that you would have an understanding of my dry sense 260 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:36,640 of humor. 261 00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:41,290 Being such a sexy, desirable, slightly nasty woman. Wait, wait, wait. You're 262 00:14:41,290 --> 00:14:42,310 doing it again right there. 263 00:14:42,510 --> 00:14:43,550 And don't tell me you're not. 264 00:14:44,110 --> 00:14:47,430 How dare you? Harold is a friend of mine who loves his daughter, and you don't 265 00:14:47,430 --> 00:14:49,950 deserve her. Let's take it down a notch. Oh, take it down a notch? 266 00:14:50,230 --> 00:14:54,910 Just relax, take a deep breath, and listen to the sound of my voice. 267 00:15:07,660 --> 00:15:08,660 A gift. 268 00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:13,440 Wow, a martini shaker. 269 00:15:13,700 --> 00:15:15,800 Yeah, I read in Newsweek that you collected them. 270 00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:17,500 This must have been really expensive. 271 00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:20,140 Why is what Jude Law collects news? 272 00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:22,760 So you like it? 273 00:15:24,460 --> 00:15:26,900 It's actually the coolest gift I've ever gotten. 274 00:15:27,780 --> 00:15:28,780 Really? 275 00:15:29,300 --> 00:15:32,960 Oh, that's so sweet. I heard Steven Spielberg gave you a Vespa. It was all 276 00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:33,960 CNN. 277 00:15:35,530 --> 00:15:36,890 We're in a war. How is this news? 278 00:15:39,450 --> 00:15:40,450 What's wrong with you? 279 00:15:40,870 --> 00:15:42,970 Jude Law and I lead very different lives. 280 00:15:44,370 --> 00:15:45,370 You think? 281 00:15:46,850 --> 00:15:50,190 People giving things for no reason. Women throw themselves at him. He looks 282 00:15:50,190 --> 00:15:51,190 great in a scarf. 283 00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:55,770 Look, his life isn't so great. He has no normalcy. Believe me, he's a very 284 00:15:55,770 --> 00:15:56,770 unhappy guy. 285 00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:57,709 How do you know? 286 00:15:57,710 --> 00:15:58,770 I read it in the Wall Street Journal. 287 00:16:50,540 --> 00:16:51,700 Look at all the good he does for the world. 288 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:53,680 Don't you think he tapes himself a little too seriously? 289 00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:55,960 For what it's worth, I think he looks great and the music is timeless. 290 00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:58,320 You're a creep. 291 00:16:58,620 --> 00:17:02,000 Well, you're giving me mixed signals. What is wrong with you two? How could 292 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,680 do this to Zoe? Okay, everybody, just calm down. 293 00:17:05,300 --> 00:17:07,859 Take a deep breath and listen to this. Stop that! 294 00:17:09,780 --> 00:17:11,500 Zoe, hey, babe. Everything all right? 295 00:17:11,740 --> 00:17:13,440 Actually, no. There's a problem with a patient of mine. 296 00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,220 Chronic overeater. He's at a drive -thru. 297 00:17:19,020 --> 00:17:20,020 Not much time. 298 00:17:22,920 --> 00:17:24,700 Don't be afraid to get in between the toes. 299 00:17:25,940 --> 00:17:29,420 Now you just sit back and relax and let me take care of these beautiful British 300 00:17:29,420 --> 00:17:30,420 feet. 301 00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:36,180 Honey, I think this has crossed the line into unethical and unsanitary. She 302 00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:37,180 handles food. 303 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:40,420 Three, two, one. 304 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:52,400 You thought it was Jude Law. 305 00:17:52,420 --> 00:17:53,980 I did and you took advantage of me? 306 00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:57,520 Calm down, I did not. Believe me, you wanted to rub more than my foot. 307 00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:26,200 Checking in with his parole officer. 308 00:18:27,140 --> 00:18:28,140 I'm kidding. 309 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,760 God, it was funnier when he did it. 310 00:18:33,600 --> 00:18:34,880 Oh, Harold, Harold. 311 00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:37,660 You were right about Zoe. 312 00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:39,420 Oh, yes. Isn't she brilliant? 313 00:18:40,100 --> 00:18:41,760 Handy to sand, yes. 314 00:18:42,140 --> 00:18:43,140 No, no, no, no. 315 00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:44,160 No, thanks. 316 00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:44,639 No, thanks. 317 00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:48,220 No, what I meant was you were right about her choices in men. 318 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:49,600 She does pick losers. 319 00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:51,320 Especially Gary. 320 00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:53,040 You know, he hit on me. 321 00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:54,900 What? 322 00:18:55,020 --> 00:18:56,080 I know. He's a bad guy, Harold. 323 00:18:57,260 --> 00:18:58,380 I have to tell Zoe. 324 00:18:59,580 --> 00:19:02,340 She's going to hate me again when I can't stand by and watch her get hurt. 325 00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:03,660 I'm sorry, Harold. 326 00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:04,960 It's not your fault. 327 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,100 Unless you're being flirty with him like you are with me. 328 00:19:10,220 --> 00:19:13,240 I'm not flirty with you. Hey, my eyes are up here. 329 00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:18,200 My dad really seems to like him. 330 00:19:18,480 --> 00:19:19,860 Yeah, he certainly seems to. 331 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:21,400 And you like him too, right? 332 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,220 Well... He's funny. So funny. 333 00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:28,240 He asked me to move in with him. 334 00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:31,380 Wow, that's so fast. 335 00:19:32,020 --> 00:19:33,320 Do you think that I'm rushing things? 336 00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:37,500 I mean, I guess that there's a part of me that's scared to take it to the next 337 00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:42,240 level, but I'm sure that that's totally natural. No, no, no, no, it's not 338 00:19:42,240 --> 00:19:44,540 natural at all. You have to listen to that part of you. 339 00:19:46,580 --> 00:19:47,580 Really? 340 00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:50,320 Zoe, open your eyes. He's not the guy you should be with. 341 00:19:52,500 --> 00:19:55,000 Kevin, are you saying what I think you're saying? 342 00:19:55,260 --> 00:19:56,260 Yes. 343 00:19:59,940 --> 00:20:01,300 I like you, too. 344 00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:02,619 You do? 345 00:20:02,620 --> 00:20:03,620 Oh, yeah. 346 00:20:07,060 --> 00:20:09,780 Zoe, we need to... Oh, no. 347 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:14,540 No, no, this will not stand. No, no, Harold, we were just sharing a beer. 348 00:20:14,540 --> 00:20:17,900 not enough for the sleazy hypnotist, but I will not stand by and watch you 349 00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,700 destroy your life with him. 350 00:20:20,860 --> 00:20:21,860 Wait, what? 351 00:20:21,950 --> 00:20:23,030 This man is a failure. 352 00:20:23,310 --> 00:20:24,850 A failure at marriage. 353 00:20:25,210 --> 00:20:29,790 A failed writer who's running a failed bookstore. Everything he touches is 354 00:20:29,790 --> 00:20:30,790 doomed to fail. 355 00:20:31,690 --> 00:20:35,610 Why would you say that? Because you're an uptight neurotic mess. 356 00:20:37,050 --> 00:20:42,150 And I will not stand by and watch my daughter get sucked into the black hole 357 00:20:42,150 --> 00:20:43,750 that is your life. 358 00:20:43,970 --> 00:20:48,690 Harold! I will date whoever I want to date, and I choose Gavin. 359 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:52,840 Call me when you get off of work. 360 00:20:53,220 --> 00:20:55,560 I have to go talk to Gary. Goodbye, Harold. 361 00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:03,220 Harold, I'd like it if you left, and I think you should find a new place to get 362 00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:05,680 your coffee. Oh, don't be such a baby. 363 00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:10,420 I just drove her into your arms. 364 00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:12,220 You should be thanking me. 365 00:21:13,060 --> 00:21:14,420 Wait, so you're happy? 366 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:15,640 Are you kidding? 367 00:21:15,900 --> 00:21:17,080 This is marvelous. 368 00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:19,560 You two are perfect for each other. 369 00:21:20,649 --> 00:21:21,649 Wow. 370 00:21:21,890 --> 00:21:22,890 Thank you. 371 00:21:24,350 --> 00:21:27,110 Still, all those mean things, they'd just roll right off your tongue, didn't 372 00:21:27,110 --> 00:21:28,110 they? 373 00:21:28,970 --> 00:21:34,070 Believe me, if I had given you my approval, it would have been the kick of 374 00:21:34,070 --> 00:21:35,070 death. 375 00:21:36,230 --> 00:21:41,670 I do like Zoe. Well, welcome to the family. 376 00:21:44,630 --> 00:21:45,630 Ew! 377 00:21:47,590 --> 00:21:49,870 At least I thought I was kissing Bono. 28515

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