All language subtitles for my_boys_s03e09_spring_training

Even things we love can become stale and
predictable.

Sometimes we can benefit from a fresh
perspective.

Is this a good hand?

Yeah, you win. Again!

I really miss Bobby right now.

Plenty of offense intended.

After three weeks, nobody misses him
more than me. I still don't understand

Bobby had to go to spring training for
so long.

All the pro teams have got to go for a
month. They've got to train, get back

into shape, figure out who's going to be
on their team. Why don't they know

their team?

Well, they do, but spring training is a
chance for young guys to, you know,

prove themselves and maybe get a shot at
the big leagues.

So now that I'm a columnist, I can
finally write about the cool stuff.

Not just transcribe box scores like some
little stat monkey.

You mean like Bobby?

I miss my little stat monkey.

But the good news is, by this time
tomorrow, we will all be in Arizona.

Wait, why are you going to Arizona?

Working. Meeting girls.

Working. Right, working.

Spring training is big for collectors.
If I can get an old cub to sign a

it more than doubles the price.

Do you have to knock the little kids out
of the way to get that?

Brendan, you should come with us.

Everybody's doing it.

Wait, Steph, you're going too?

You don't even like baseball.

No, but I like spas.

And free stuff.

So, I talked Travel and Leisure magazine
into sending me.

So, technically, it's a business trip.
You should totally come. You know, if

this was college... You'd be the oldest
guy in the dorm. You'd be arrested for

being creepy.

You'd have a name for your bong.

Zeus.

Yeah, but there'd be some great vacation
going on right now. I mean, come on.

Why does spring break have to stop just
because we're not in school anymore?

That's right.

Spring break.

We're working.

Right. Working.

You don't have to watch, Mike. Yeah, I
do.

I'm going to the hotel.

Wait, you're in our hotel?

Ha! So much for your fancy spa weekend.
You're in the same boat as us. Not

exactly. Unless your boat is the Grand
Executive Suite, because that's my boat.

Hey, uh, speaking of boats, bed, bed,
bed, floor.

Oh, it's Andy.

Hey, what's up?

It's poker night. Where are you?

Arizona, remember?

That's this week?

I thought that was next week. Remember?
You said you were going to water my

plants. Drink your scotch?

You're breaking up. Sorry.

Gotta go.

Alcohol.

Hey. Hey.

So did you figure out what your first
big spring training column is going to

Well, I have some ideas, but I'm not
exactly sure yet, you know? I just want

write something that hasn't been written
before.

Oh. Is that all?

Spring break, vacation, spring training.

Kind of makes me feel like anything's
possible, huh, fellas?

And the ratio of women to men is like 20
to 1. I like my odds.

Hey, those a couple of Dodgers?

Yeah.

Well, this place is dead. Let's go check
out the hotel.

I'm kind of tired from the trip anyway.

Spring training is a great chance for
young ballplayers to prove themselves.

And young reporters, too.

So, you want to join me for the
afternoon game?

Oh, God, I'd love to, but most starters
are gone by the third inning, so where's

the story in that, you know? Well, you
never know.

No, I'm going to go talk to some of the
folks at the front office later on and

find out why they didn't sign a bigger
player during the offseason.

All right. Well, I'll see you later
tonight.

Okay.

Ah, star -crossed lovers from the
Tribune and the Sun -Times. That's

It's like Romeo and Juliet.

Romeo and Juliet died in the end. I'm
not wishing it on you, kid. I'm just

saying.

You enjoying the desert air, Jack? I
can't stand it. The wife wants to retire

down here, but I'm not having it.
There's too many scorpions.

How's the column coming? Terrible?

Great. Actually, I'm going to go talk to
some of the guys in management later

on. You're going to be asking them why
they didn't go after C .C.

Sabathia in the off -season?

That might come up. You know, I've been
writing that same free agent column

since 1988.

I just switched the names.

Well, I mean, my take's a little
different, so... Right, right. You know,

those stories have already been written,
kiddo, but I'm sure you'll find the

fresh one.

You know, they got poison in their
tails.

I mean, who wants to deal with that?

They're like mini dinosaurs.

Hey, how'd it go today?

I struck out, as they say.

Ah, me too. Twice.

Peach, this is Owen Scott.

Oh, hi.

Owen played in Lansing last year.

Yeah. Well, if I ever want to play in
Chicago, I should probably call it a

night. But it was nice meeting you, PJ.
Yeah, good luck out there. You too.

Tomorrow's another day, right?

Let's hope.

Hey, I got a question for you. Does the
sun times let you expense beer?

Oh, God, no.

That's why we always drink at places
that serve food.

Genius.

Hi.

Hi. I'm Connie.

Brendan.

Brendan. That's Iris.

Huh? Yeah.

Are you a leprechaun, Brendan?

It depends on who's looking for me.

Maybe it's me.

What do I get if I catch you?

Oh, uh, yellow moons, orange stars,
green clovers. Oh, I like green clovers.

So, uh, Connie, is that, um, like,
Latvian or Peruvian?

Check.

Go back to being a leprechaun, Brendan.

Dude,

I cannot get a woman to talk to you.
Just because I'm not a ball player, big

deal. What do those guys have that I
don't? Muscle, talent, potential, youth.

Just because they can hit a ball with a
stick or throw a ball hard, I can throw

a ball hard. I could strike one of those
guys out. Who?

It's a pro dude.

Of all of the crazy things that you have
claimed. I could be mayor.

I could land a jet. I could find Bin
Laden. That might be the craziest, all

right? You cannot strike out a
professional baseball player. I could. I

in high school.

Hey, there's your column right there.
Mike Callahan, a young... Bobblehead

salesman. Naperville Central all -star,
walked into Ho -Hocum today and rocked

the Cubs world by striking out fill -in
-the -blank.

Mike, she's a columnist, not a fiction
writer. That's not even a fiction.

fantasy.

Yo. Hey, they got Hefeweizen on tap.

Okay. I'm in Arizona.

I just thought you'd want to know.

Dude, do you miss us?

No.

You've been gone two days.

You know, and I'm very busy.

Got a full life and a full glass of
Hefeweizen.

Yeah.

Freak, freak!

Woo!

What? Why is she into you? Does she
think you're a ball player?

No. She thinks I'm a leprechaun.

I hate to break this to you, but that
girl is dating Mike Fontenot.

Cub's second baseman, Mike Fontenot?

Well, that's too bad for Mike Fontenot.

Finders keepers.

Brendan, she has a boyfriend.

She doesn't act like it, but all I see
is... Hot!

My sources tell me they're on...

Donna Hughes. All right, I got to go.
Mike, you stay here.

You've been working very hard today.

What, you're making fun of me? Yeah.

Plus, I don't want you talking to Santa
five beers in, so I will see you guys

later. You too.

Because we're staying at the same hotel,
and we might run into each other in the

elevator, which would disgust me.

I'm going to go make sure this phone
number's real.

Yeah, I got to get up early.

All my ideas are drying up. I got to
find something to write about.

Hey, hey, you know, uh, Peach.

I was hoping that we could chat later,
you know, like just the two of us.

Yeah. Yeah, you want to get an early
lunch? Yeah, yeah, that'll be great.

You coming? Yeah.

Night, guys.

Good night.

Later, pumpkin.

Well, it's just you and me, kid.

You can be my wingwoman.

Yeah, he actually has a great story.
Yeah, I know. It gets better every year.

Dabney Haywood's been driving his
tractor for 30 years. In that time, he's

probably run over 50 ,000 scorpions.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

J. Franklin has had her job for just
five months.

She's about to be fired for turning in
absolutely nothing.

Steph, I'm really worried about my
deadline. I can't find anything to write

about. CJ, you need to relax.

I mean, that's what works for me.

Steph, you write about the spa.

Hey, it's not all fun and games, okay?

Yesterday I had a salt scrub and it
hurt.

So what is it you want to talk to me
about?

Oh, yeah, that.

Um, I mean, it's nothing serious, but...
Morning, guys.

Am I interrupting something?

Um, well, we were just talking.

Oh, you know, just like stupid girl
stuff.

And we can just save it for later.

Are you sure?

Absolutely. Yeah.

Hey, how's the article coming?

Oh, it's terrible.

Everything has been done. I can't find
anything new about spring training.

Maybe you just need a different
perspective.

Yeah, like face down with hot rocks on
your ass.

Yeah, that.

Or how about going to a baseball game?

Sitting in the stands being a fan.

Gosh, I haven't done that in forever.

Hey, let's do that today.

The Cubs are playing the Rockies.

Forget about your column. No pads, no
pens.

Just fun.

You and me.

And Mike.

And Kenny.

And Brando.

I'm still kind of working. No, no,
you're not working. Remember, we agreed

just enjoy the game from the stands.

That's a great idea. You know, we should
make the same agreement.

Mike, you made that same agreement with
yourself four beers ago.

I won!

You are the best beer I have ever had.

Good, because it was $8.

Oh, dude.

That girl is a 10 out of 10.

Dude, you're playing with fire, I am
telling you.

What, because I'm fun, though?

Please.

Hey, guys, check it out. It's Owen
Scott.

Oh, my God.

Hey, I'm cheering.

Huh?

We're not allowed to cheer or anything
in the press box. Oh.

for two if I was on the mound. Oh, man.
Here we go again.

I'm serious. Put me in and I'll strike
that dude out in three pitches.

Remember how Brendan said in spring
training anything's possible?

That's not.

I caught you, you little leprechaun.

Now do I get your pot of gold?

Yes, you do, but are you sure your
boyfriend won't mind?

What are you talking about?

my friends that you're dating Mike
Fonda.

Oh, I am.

What? Yeah.

Really?

Then what the hell are you doing with
me?

Mike's always liked baseball this and
baseball that, so the easiest way to get

his attention is to make him jealous.

No.

Connie, I don't think I want any part of
that. Oh, too late. I already told him

we slept together.

That's totally insane. Why would you do
that? I told you I like to make him

jealous, so let's go make out behind
home plate.

You guys, spring break rule has gone
haywire, all right? That Connie chick is

off her nut.

She told Mike Fontenot that we slept
together.

Did you?

Yeah, Mike, I did, right there in line.
Here's your nachos. I don't want them

anymore. Dude, you do not want to make
Mike Fontenot mad. The guy swings a bat

for a living.

So what am I going to do?

Here's the story I'm getting sick of.

You guys, I'm totally in love with this
crazy hot chick.

Oh, wait a minute, dudes. I think she
just made soup out of my shoes.

You know, there are plenty of beautiful,
sane women out there.

Stop shopping at the crazy mall.

But it's such a good mall.

You know, they got the duck pond and the
food court. It's Orange Julius.

It's also next to a hospital.

You want to end up there?

No.

I do not.

All right. Then ask yourself, why are
you drawn to crazy chicks?

You know you're going to be trapped in
the cycle until you figure it out.

Brandon, calm down. I seriously doubt
Mike Fontenot even knows who you are.

Well...

The biggest difference between the
regular season and spring training is

the first three innings, but the last
three.

Number 87.

Who the hell is that?

I've never heard any of the guys playing
right now. It's because the starters

are in the outfield running wind
sprints. These guys are all minor

right, my margarita light is flashing.

Let's go.

I've been bored since...

Hey, where are you guys going?

It's 13 to 4. I think the Cubs have lost
this one. They could always come back.

Screw it, they can't come back. Screw
it. Chapter 1 from Mike Callahan's Guide

to Living.

Let's go.

Well, I'm not leaving until it's over.
It's bad luck.

Well, it's going to be bad luck for me
if I don't get out of here.

Fine, I did not look happy.

It's Owen Scott.

Oh, go away!

Hey,

hey, hey.

Your buddy is a home run away from
hitting for the cycle.

Yeah, look at that. He had a single in
the fourth, double in the sixth, and a

triple in the first.

Oh, he wants it. He wants it bad.

Yeah, but, Paige, don't get too excited.
You know how slim the odds are. Yeah,

that's exactly why I'm excited.

It takes something pretty special to get
two jaded sports reporters to spill

beer on their shoot.

Something like watching an unknown kid
do something extraordinary.

I don't know. I was just really seeing
the ball well today. It helps getting

that triple out of the way early.

Yeah, well, you still needed that homer.

To be honest, I don't even remember that
part.

So what do you think your chances are of
making the team?

Hey, I'm a long shot, I know. But I got
to say, today felt...

Really good. It was probably one of the
greatest days of my life. It was fun.

Yeah, it was fun.

All right, thank you so much for the
interview.

And congrats again.

My pleasure, Ms. Franklin.

Hey, um, any chance you and some friends
feel like helping settle a bet?

Hey,

rookie, let's see what you got.

Are you serious?

OK.

All right. I need to warm up a little
bit.

OK.

I

wish

Andy was here. He would love this. Oh,
shoot. You're right. I'm going to call

him.

I'm kind of in the middle of something.

What are you doing?

Savannah's birthday.

Andy, are you ready?

I gotta go.

Come on.

It's a new low.

Try throwing it on her hand, Callahan.

Hey, man. What are you doing with my
girlfriend?

Oh, my God. Look, dude, you don't
understand, okay? I never touched

swear to God. Why would she lie?

To get your attention.

To make you jealous, dude, she's playing
games with you. She's trouble.

I'm with you, dude.

I'm attracted to crazy women, too.

I dated a girl who boiled my shoes.

My last girlfriend lit my car on fire.
Okay, see? We're chasing the wrong kinds

of women.

It's because we're afraid of committing
to the good ones. You think?

Yeah. And we can always blame it on
crazy when stuff erupts into flames.

Literally. Yeah. You know, there are
plenty of beautiful, sane women out

We gotta break the cycle, man. We gotta
stop shopping at the crazy mall.

Dude, you get me. I know.

Not a strikeout. It has to go by the
batter three times.

So did you find an idea for your call?

Yeah, yeah. You know when you see an
unknown kid like Owen do something truly

great? That's when you realize that
anything is possible, and that's what's

special about spring training.

Can I quit now? I don't know. Did you
strike anyone out?

No? Keep going.

We're gonna need more balls.

Oh, hey, Andy.

You are the first one here.

Um, Andy?

What? We're hugging.

We don't hug. I know, but I missed you.

Promise you'll never leave me again.

Okay. Promise?

I promise.

All right. We'll never talk of a hug
again.

Hey. Hey.

Hey. Somebody left this poor 18 -year
-old bottle of scotch in your doorstep.

Whoa. What's happening? Who is this?
Promise me you'll never leave me again.

Okay. I promise.

Where's Kenny? He missed our flight.

He'll be here.

Who's the bottle from, Peach? It's from
Jack Briscoe.

Great column, kid.

You're ahead of the curve, and I'm happy
to report that Owen Scott made the Cubs

roster. Hey!

Well, of course he made the team. You
saw the way he hit against me. Easy

heater. Oh, shoot. I forgot to get beer.
I didn't have a chance to restock. All

right, I'll go.

I'll come with you.

Thanks. Whoa, whoa. You're going to
leave us here with Huggy Andy?

Yep.

Not leaving here.

Baby,

your column is really great.

I couldn't have written it without you.

Oh, I know.

I feel a little sorry, though. I never
got a chance to talk to Steph.

About what?

I don't know. She said she had something
important to tell me. We just never got

around to... I wonder what

she wanted to tell you.