All language subtitles for My Boys s01e05 The Show

So Hank and I are dating now, and it's
like I got called up to the majors.

They don't even look like cats. They're
not cats.

They're meerkats. Look, I don't care
what they are. I don't want to watch

Meerkats are so cute.

You've got to give it time. Okay, look.
Right now, what do you think he's doing?

He's scouting the area, and he's going
to give orders to the family down there.

They're ready. Look at them. They're
ready to go. One on the right looks like

he's going ballistic. He can't wait to
fight. What do you guys think?

Fantastic. I like the jacket. It's a
good choice. Nice hat. You guys are

useless.

Dude, look at him go. Watch this. They
couldn't do that.

It's what every player dreams about. The
call up to the majors. The call up to

the show.

Where the grass is greener and the food
tastes better.

Literally. Okay, I gotta tell you, this
is the best and first Osso Buco that

I've ever had.

You want Osso Buco? There's this little
hole in the wall. It's flooring.

It's unbelievable.

I'll take you there sometime.

Okay, I'm free on Thursday.

Well, I'll see what I can do.

Hey, what is this anyway? What is this,
like a brontosaurus?

It's big.

That's a big -ass bone.

It's big.

So, here we are.

Yeah.

God, you know, thanks again. I had a
really good time tonight. Me too.

Well, um... Good night.

Yeah. Good night.

The thing about the show is, once you
get there, you really

don't want to leave.

Good night.

You're repeating yourself. Yeah, but
that's the last time this happened.

Good night. Good night.

Good morning.

Hey, where did those good nights go?

That was a really good one.

Now what?

Food! Whoa, whoa, whoa. You're going to
love this place. They have the most

amazing omelets. Oh, I love the omelets.
Oh, my God, that's Brendan.

Who? Brendan. He's a good friend of
mine.

Yes, I can see that. He's actually
staying with me. I don't believe this.

God. He told me he was visiting his
parents.

Oh, no, he seems very close with his
mom.

We gotta get out of here. What?

And there he is with his ex -girlfriend
just making out, playing his day.

Doesn't even have the decency to skulk
around.

So he's seeing Wendy again. That's a big
deal. The big deal is that I'm the one

that has to pick up the pieces every
single time. You know what?

So don't do it anymore. You know what?
I'm not gonna do it anymore.

This time when they break up, he can
stay at your place.

Uh, well, actually, he can't.

I don't think it's going to be my place
much longer. What are you talking about?

Meredith decided she wants to live in
the suburbs.

What? I know. And you're thinking of
going with her?

Well, you know how it is. More space,
better schools, quiet desperation.

No, no, no, no, no, no. Andy, this can't
happen.

It's happening.

I actually have to see a house with her
this afternoon.

But did you understand what happens to
people when they move to the suburbs?

Remember Eric and Cindy?

Nope. Exactly.

We're never going to see you again.

Come on, that's not true.

It is true.

You're going to see me all the time.

Eric and Cindy.

I don't know any Eric and Cindy.

Exactly.

Hey, guys. Hey, bud.

To be continued.

When? I'll never see you again. Well,
then remember me as I am.

Young and perky.

So, Brando, how are the folks?

Great.

That's nice.

Hey, you know, your mom...

and she happened to mention that you
didn't actually spend the night there

night.

Yeah, yeah.

Funny story, actually. True story, too.

I actually bumped into some friends of
mine from the station, and they were all

on their way to this party, so they
asked me if I wanted to go... To the

To the party, yeah. And so, you know, I
went to the party. Oh, my God. Oh, God.

Stop it.

I saw you with Wendy.

What?

This morning at Staley's, Hank and I saw
you two together.

Morning meal with Hank.

Nice. You guys sealed the deal? Oh,
we're trying to change the subject.

Gee, PJ, I mean, you could have told me
you saw me. Why'd you have to make me go

through all that? Oh, I'm sorry. You're
giving me crap for not coming out and

telling you something. You're really
going with that.

All right, look, I didn't say anything
because I know how judgmental you get.

I'm not judgmental. So you think it's a
good thing that Wendy and I are back

together? God, no. I think it's the
worst thing that ever happened in the

history of the land.

Oh, well, at least you're not being
judgmental. Okay, you know what? When it

comes to you and Wendy, I am judgmental.
But that is only because it is torture

watching you guys do this over and over
again. I mean, when are you finally

going to face the fact that this
relationship does not work?

Well, actually, I'm going to ask her to
marry me.

Congratulations. Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

Hank is perfect.

You're dating Mr.

Perfect. You know, I never dated anybody
like Hank before.

He makes plans.

And then we do those plans. And they
are, like, fancy plans.

It's very... It's grown -up, you know?

I'm grown -up dating.

You're grown -up dating.

I mean, I get all dressed up, you know?
I worry about what to wear.

I shave my legs every day.

I wanted Mr. Perfect.

Where's my Mr. Perfect? I'm telling you,
he's out there, you know?

Something is in the air.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Brendan and Wendy are getting engaged.

What?

That's horrible.

I mean, I can't believe Brendan is
getting married before me.

Is he even remotely ready for this?

I mean, does he understand what a huge
commitment it is? Does he have a dress

already picked out?

Because I do.

And I've narrowed it down to three pairs
of shoes.

Well, you know what? I think it's
terrific.

You know? I think they're going to be
really happy together. I completely

support his decision.

I've been working all day on that. I
could tell.

Man, I'm like sweating.

What are you doing?

Going through ads for engagement rings.

I can't believe how many choices you
have to make.

Hey, answer me this.

How am I supposed to find out what size
ring she is without her actually knowing

that I'm getting her a ring?

You steal one of her rings while she's
not looking and you measure it.

Off her finger?

Yes, Brendan, you cut off her finger and
you take the ring from her jewelry box.

What's wrong with you?

That's perfect.

You are a genius. Gun for your money.

Wow.

Hey, look at you.

Wait a minute, look at you. That can't
be good. Why do you look like that? Why

does she look like that? I don't know.
Why do you look like that? I'm going

Why are you guys here?

You moved poker tonight, didn't you? No,
I moved it to next Thursday.

I thought this was next Thursday. No,
this is this Thursday. Next Thursday is

next Thursday.

Yes, but when you moved it, this was
next Thursday. No, this was always this.

thursday next thursday is next thursday
technically this was the next thursday

wasn't it right which is exactly what
makes it this thursday you're not

understanding the word next you guys
don't have time to argue this right now

hank's coming over in like like five
minutes we actually get to meet the

mythical hank oh god help me please
don't embarrass me we're talking about

not gonna embarrass you

Nice cleavage. Are you even wearing a
bra?

Okay, guys.

Brando. Brando. Hey, man. Are you ready
to play some cards? I thought we moved

poker to next Thursday. This is next
Thursday.

Oh. Well, sorry, guys. I got to go over
to Wendy's and steal a ring.

Brando, if you need a loan, I'm asking
her to marry me. What?

Really? That's huge.

Dude, are you sure you're really ready
for that?

Yeah, trust me, Brendan.

Marriage is not something to be entered
into.

That's all I got.

And right on cue.

Dude, you've really got to get a new
ringtone.

I want people to know how I roll.

Yes, Meredith.

What?

Now. No, I can't do it now.

Yes, but I can't do it now.

Can't do it now.

Okay.

You're kidding.

Sorry, guys. Meredith just saw a house
she needs me to see immediately.

Come on, that knocks us down to three.
You can't play poker with three.

You gotta blow it off. I can't. The real
estate agent said it'll be gone in the

morning. Where is it?

Naperville.

Naperville? Dude, that's not even
Chicago.

Come on, yes it is. Don't kid yourself.
That's the land part of Chicagoland.

Well, this is a waste of a perfectly
good night.

Hello.

Hey!

How you doing?

Uh, you guys, this... This is Hank.

Hank, these are my friends. It's Brendan
and Kenny and Bobby, and that's my

brother Andy.

You hurt my sister, I'll kill you.

And Mike.

I heard a lot about you guys. Yeah, us
too.

Or is it we two?

Hey, is that we two?

We two, we two, we two. Try it, it's
fun. We two, we, we two, we.

See that?

That's a normal ringtone.

That's how he rolls.

Hello.

Excuse me.

Did you see the guy's suit?

Yeah. It's boss, Armani, Xenia, whatever
it is. It's two dimes a poppet. That

kid is sweating cash.

Hey, he seems like a really nice guy.

Yeah. He actually seems like the type of
person who might just enjoy, you know,

hanging out and maybe playing some
poker.

Well, he actually doesn't play.

He doesn't play?

He doesn't play.

You're dating a guy who doesn't play.

Yeah. I got it, I got it. Totally.

You know, you have all kinds of new
priorities now. And listen, I, we, we

support that. But can I also state, just
for the record, that this is total

bullshit. Total bullshit.

Come on, you guys are being ridiculous.

Oh, our game fell apart.

What are we supposed to do now?

Well, I don't know. You figure it out.
I'm not your mother.

Sorry about that. Uh, we gotta go. You
ready?

Yeah. Oh, I'll walk out with you guys.
Yeah, I'll come.

Hey, it was nice to meet you guys. Yeah,
me too. Nice to meet you too.

The other thing about being called up to
the majors is only some of the

teammates get the call. So as much as
you're all rooting for each other, when

that divide appears, it does become a
little difficult to ignore.

Still, you figure, after a little
adjustment period, everyone makes their

with it and moves on.

Hey, guys.

Well, well, well. If it isn't our old
friend PJ.

What are you doing around here,
slumming? Or not.

Oh, ha, ha. Come on, you guys. Don't be
like that, huh? I'm sorry about poker

the other night.

Poker? What poker? There was no poker
the other night.

You guys, you don't need me to play
poker.

We do. Your place is the hub. Now we're
totally hubless, completely without hub.

Oh, okay. I'm sorry. I'm supposed to
dump Hank so you guys have a place to

and play poker every night?

Why do you make it sound unreasonable?

Well... Hey, good. You're here. You
coming to the movies with us? Thank you.

would love to. I can't, though. Hank is
taking me to the opera.

Let's dress up like dorks and listen.

Come on, guys.

Be happy for me. Be happy I met a guy
who wants to take me to new and

places. Is that sexual?

Sounds kind of dirty.

It's not sexual to me. We don't talk
about stuff like that. It's this Hank

character. I don't like his influence.

She's a totally different person. Wait,
you guys, what are you expecting? I'm

going to dick around with you guys for
the rest of my life?

Wow. Really? All right, I didn't mean
that.

Getting awfully crowded in here. Yes.

Robert, Kenneth, perhaps we should go
dick around someplace else. Maybe we

dick around at the movies. Because you
know I didn't mean it like that, right?

Actually, we should call the theater to
see what their dicking around policies

are. Come on, you guys. And when we're
done dicking around, maybe we should

ourselves a new hub.

Well, enjoy Parsifal.

Thank you.

I dated a mezzo -soprano once.

An opera leader.

Oh, all right. Bye.

Wait, you guys are going to leave like
that?

And that's when it hits you that it
might not be that easy after all.

That once that divide appears, you just
might not be able to cross back over it

again.

Unless there's a killer guitar solo
coming up, please make this stop. I'm

God.

Hank is taking me to the opera.

Yeah. Well, good luck with that. Thanks.

Oh, you know, speaking of luck.

Yeah. I'm off to get my ring.

Tonight's the night. I'm asking her.

Sometimes people can get called up to
the show when you really don't think

they're ready for it. You're really
going through with this.

Yeah. And it's really what you want.

It is.

Yeah.

You know, I've been over this a million
times, and I really think that the

reason that we keep going back and forth
is just I haven't had the guts to step

it up, you know?

That all changes tonight.

But in the end, you just have to wish
him luck and hope for the best.

You know, I just want you to be happy,
right?

I am.

I am. Yeah. I am. Okay.

It's a grown -up thing.

Yeah, I know.

Kind of weird, right? Yeah, it's so
weird. It's weird.

It is weird.

Yeah. I'm going to go.

Come on in.

I can't believe I've never been here
before.

I know. I've been meaning to have you
guys over for a while now, but you know

how it is.

Pretty cool, huh?

Sure.

Is this the living room?

Yeah. Why?

No reason.

Well, go on, man. Cop a squat. Make
yourself at home.

Let's see what's on the big screen.

So how long have you lived here,
exactly?

Well, I don't know. Ten years, give or
take.

Dude, wow.

Yeah, I know, huh?

Hey, what do you guys think would be the
worst way to die?

I'm going to say being hit in the balls
with lightning.

Or old age.

Long and slow.

That's no way to go.

I was thinking we could always go over
to my place and hang out there and talk

about balls and all that.

Hey, come on. Project Runway's on.

All right.

Fine.

I'll see you later, Frank.

Oh, hang on. Someone's texting me.

That's from Kenny.

Man, this is Mike's place. Really
creepy. I'm still mad at you, but I had

tell someone.

Why is he mad at you?

Oh, my God. We got into this fight. I
said the stupidest thing. Plus, poker

all screwed up.

Well, I don't know. At least he's
talking to me.

Well, do you need to call him?

Oh, no. I'll call him later at school. I
have an opera to go to.

Okay. But again, I just want to warn
you. It's like three hours.

I know. It's no problem.

And all in German.

Uh -huh. Very funny.

Seriously?

It's a nice place. A little cluttered
for my taste.

Well, things really fill up when you add
stuff like furniture.

Hey, is this the living room?

Yeah. Why?

Why do you have so many shirts hanging
in this closet?

I ran out of room in the bedroom.

How many shirts do you have, man? I
don't know. I like shirts. What's it to

Nothing.

It's just that's a lot of shirts.

It's kind of weird, dude.

Seriously.

That's it. No, no, no, no.

I was going to use the coaster. Yeah,
but condensation builds up on the

then that trickles onto the wood. Next
thing you know, mayhem.

Do you have them arranged by color or
pattern?

Sleeve length?

By purpose.

Purpose? I don't know what that means.

I have kettle corn.

I can't believe...

You know, you always said you wanted a
nice romantic dinner under the star,

so... Here you go.

This is amazing.

Hold on a second.

Oh, God!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God, I am so sorry.

No, it's a new shirt, but I can totally
get it cleaned. I can't believe I just

did that. Yeah, well, let's just try to
transcend the moment.

You're absolutely right.

After all we do, we've got a beautiful
night.

Beautiful girl.

You know, Wendy, I know that we've had
our ups and downs.

Oh, one thing, actually.

One, two.

You thought of everything. Yeah, well, I
tried.

Oh, my God.

I can't believe I... Ow!

I'm like Jerry Lewis.

Are you okay?

Yes, I'm fine, I think.

All right, you know what? I'm just going
to cut to the chase here before I do

any more permanent damage.

I need to love you.

I want to spend the rest of my life with
you.

I'm hating this.

I am hating this.

Let's get out of here.

Oh, thank you, God.

So what do you want to do now?

That's for Mike.

Kenny has 697 shirts.

And then he says, her ass is... He's a
sweet guy, man.

Oh, I'm sorry. What?

What? What do I want to do? What do you
want to do?

I know what you want to do.

So Hank wasn't pissed at all? What? No,
I'm going to head over there later. He's

totally fine with it. That's great.

Hank seems cool.

Yeah, he is.

By the way...

It's official.

Meredith and I now own a house in the
Burbs.

Take his money now, fellas. You'll never
see it again.

Would you stop saying that? She's right,
dude.

It's going to be just like Eric and
Cindy all over again. Who the hell are

and Cindy? I know it.

Oh, my God. Eric and Cindy. I totally
forgot about them.

Sound that depressing?

A toast to Andy?

Yeah. To Andy. You were a kind and
decent man. Sort of.

And you will be missed.

Oh, and to Brendan? To Brendan?

Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah.

Hey, guys.

Hey. We were just drinking to you.

Oh, yeah? Yeah.

What are you doing here?

She said no.

Oh, man. I'm sorry.

Oh, man. Sorry, buddy.

I'm kidding.

I'm totally kidding. Dude. Dude, don't
do that.

Congratulations.

Congratulations. That was good, but I'm
not rooting for you.

Actually, we're going to take off for
the weekend to celebrate, so I just came

home to grab a few things.

Why don't you join us for a minute? No,
no, it's just that... Come on!

Before the ball went chain, my friend.

Two hands. Two hands.

So maybe that's the thing.

Maybe being called up to the show
doesn't have to create this whole great

after all.

You just have to do everything you can
to help your old teammates make it up

there as well.

Because, well, what the hell, it's a lot
more fun with them right there beside

you anyway.